Dec
12

You Probably Also Think that Africa isn’t a Country




Posted at 20:46 by Cerberus


Only known photo of Daniel Horowitz

I don’t tend to do shorters, but sometimes you just have to throw your hands up and post it anyways, because you just can’t believe the argument is that inane.

As such:

Shorter Daniel Horowitz, FascistState:
Newt Gingrich Tells the Truth About the Palestinian Non-Entity

    • Palestinians are just a delusion of the liberal mind and its desire to hurt Israel.
  • Yeah.

    I fucking dare you to get off the boat.

    Oh and a taste of what you are in for?

    The Palestinians are the global warming climate change of geopolitical conflict. They use deceptive parlance to advance their agenda. Thankfully, Newt is speaking the truth, instead of worshiping at the altar of the pan-Islamists in the UN.

    Newt Gingrich is just as right on Palestine as he is about climate change! Also the UN is controlled by Muslims who probably also planted all those fake fossil records for evolution. The sky is green and the Freemasons control my teeth!

    I…I…just.

    Sorry people, I’m out.

    But as apology, please enjoy what this douche uses as a twitter logo:


    Fighting the fight against vegetables and tasteful visual design since I realized Mommy was part of the Islamo-Communist Conspiracy!


    ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™ Stealing Tintin’s shtick on the very same blog is created by Cerberus.

    266 Comments »

    1. Bitter Scribe said,

      December 12, 2011 at 20:56

      Mike Huckabee says the same thing, IIRC–no such thing as Palestinians.

      Yeah, just because your ancestors have lived in a certain place for generations doesn’t mean you have the right to hang around. Let’s take over Mexico, because what the hell, they’re all brown-skinned and speak Spanish so they’ll fit right in when they push them into South Murrica or whatever that place is.

    2. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 20:56

      fywp!

    3. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 12, 2011 at 20:57

      Daniel Horowitz is just trying to stay relevant. Which he is having a hard time doing, as the right wing is stampeding past his Islamist alarmism. It used to be a person could get reviled as a bigot for saying horrible things about all of the practitioners of a large religion. But in the current media climate, that isn’t shocking enough. Horowitz is actually going to have to demand genocide if he wants to keep his rep as the most Islam-hating guy in the room.

    4. address my envelope, lips! said,

      December 12, 2011 at 20:57

      Annex Canada! Whoever heard of Canadians anyway?

    5. kg said,

      December 12, 2011 at 20:58

      Let’s take over Mexico

      Isn’t this how we got California?

    6. address my envelope, lips! said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:00

      And that logo – if you took out everything except the elephant and the teacup, and put it over a photo of Newt so that the elephant is looking at Newt with that cross expression, it might be saved as a visual.

      I always feel sorry for elephants, socialistic and feminist creatures that they are, being co-opted by the most idiotic personalities in the US. When Nast used the elephant he wasn’t being complimentary, but that’s no excuse to keep maligning one of the nicest creatures on the planet.

    7. Bitter Scribe said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:02

      Isn’t this how we got California?

      No, we bought California fair and square.

      That is, after the Mexicans refused our first offer and we added the little sales incentive of invading Mexico City.

    8. address my envelope, lips! said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:03

      Isn’t this how we got California?

      I think we bought parts of Cali from the Spanish. Virginia, though, we just walked in and took. (Along with Texas, when it was deemed convenient.)

      Louisiana and Alaska, though, we bought, fair and square.

      Wait, what? You mean there were people living there already who had no say in the purchase and received no monies from same?! Did they have a flag? Well, then.

    9. Pupienus said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:04

      BTW bbkf, how’d the sauerbraten turn out?

    10. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:13

      BTW bbkf, how’d the sauerbraten turn out?

      haven’t made it yet…’tis for the eve of babby jeebus…altho, maybe i should do a practice run?

    11. Aunt Acid said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:13

      Everyone knows there is no such thing as a “Texan”. They are just a part of the larger American community, who happen to live in Texas. There’s simply no rational reason to assume that the so-called Texans couldn’t be assimilated into the population of the greater United States (initially in refugee camps and shelters, but that shouldn’t last for more than a generation or three). So when the Mexicans seek to reclaim this territory, referred to by the squatters who have eked out a living there as “Texas”, there should be absolutely no international outcry for the displacement of the “Texan peoples”, right?

    12. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:15

      There’s simply no rational reason to assume that the so-called Texans couldn’t be assimilated into the population of the greater United States (initially in refugee camps and shelters, but that shouldn’t last for more than a generation or three).

      i beg to differ…i lived there for a couple of years, and things like ‘assimilation’ to anything normal seems like a tall order for most of them…

    13. Spaghetti Lee said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:20

      That elephant looks like he’s watching an off-panel orgy, and half disgusted and half wondering whether he should join in.

    14. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:22

      omfg…is my mom says she is ‘retired’ one more time, i am going to lose it…the last time she had a job is 1985…she doesn’t even get her own ss for dog’s sake!!!

    15. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:25

      Juan Cole weighed in on this yesterday:

      You could make all the same assertions about Albanians that Gingrich made about Palestinians. There was no Albanian state in antiquity. They were ruled by the Byzantine, Bulgarian, Serbian and Ottoman Empires. There was no Albanian province under the Ottomans.

      But Gingrich does not assert that the Albanians are not a nation. It is not necessary to denationalize the Albanians. None of Gingrich’s campaign contributors wants to make the Albanians stateless and homeless and steal all their land and property.

      http://www.juancole.com/2011/12/washington-actions-on-palestine-dont-differ-from-gingrichs-words.html

    16. Aunt Acid said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:26

      The so-called “Texans” are a made-up people. In the case of Texan women, I would add make that “heavily made-up”.

    17. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:27

      The so-called “Texans” are a made-up people. In the case of Texan women, I would add make that “heavily made-up”.

      heh…indeed…

    18. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:30

      Now now. There’s nothing wrong with Texas – except that it’s full of Texans.

    19. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:32

      according to my mother, you can buy a ‘chifforobe’ at ikea…she came up with that word after remembering ‘what the colored guy broke up for the girl in to kill a mockingbird?’

      *sigh* can we send her back to texas?

    20. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:33

      Now now. There’s nothing wrong with Texas – except that it’s full of Texans.

      that was my biggest problem with it…

    21. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:35

      Y’know, most campaigns have spin doctors.

      Newt needs a fucking dervish.

    22. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:38

      Newt needs a fucking dervish.

      mitt has a harpy, so newt can’t be too far behind…

    23. Aunt Acid said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:40

      There’s nothing wrong with Texas – except that it’s full of Texans

      And there’s nothing wrong with Uta, except that it’s full of Mormons;
      theres nothing wrong with Florida, except it’s full of freaks, feebs and old people;
      there’s nothing wrong with Montana, except that it’s fucking freezing cold 9 months of the year;
      there’s nothing wrong with Alabama, except..no wait, Alabama sucks;
      there’s nothing wrong with Colorado…AT ALL! (All right, if you could just burn CO Springs out like a precancerous wart…)

    24. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:43

      ha, ha…now she just said her asshat husband’s kid’s house is ‘drowned’…

    25. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:44

      there’s nothing wrong with Colorado…AT ALL!

      Hypoxia. Tim Tebow.

    26. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:45

      There’s nothing wrong with Wisconsin except for a pernicious lack of 10,000′+ high mountains and warm sandy beaches on warm salt water seas. Oh and that douchebag in the governor’s mansion, and his stooges in the state legislature.

    27. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:48

      There’s nothing wrong with New York. Period. End of discussion.

    28. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:50

      totally OMFG…my mother is now bitching about how asshat’s son’s wife HASN’T WORKED SINCE SHE MARRIED HIM!!! ZOMG SHE STAYS AT HOME WITH THE KIDS!!!

    29. Pupienus said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:51

      Romney Accidentally Crashes Married Gay Vet’s Date While Trolling for Anti-Gay Votes

    30. Aunt Acid said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:53

      There’s nothing wrong with Colorado, except that it’s full of Californians

    31. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:54

      minnesota is full of scandahoovians…

    32. lobbey said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:55

      Red Meat would be a great name for an S&M club?

    33. tensor said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:56

      Horrorshowlackwitz is being clever* with Palestinean Non-Entity,’ you see, as Saudi Arabia has long had a “Committe Against Normalizing Relations with the Zionist Entity.” See? The soft elimainationism of low bigotry is OK shen WE do it!!1!

      Then again, wasn’t this joker a die-hard Communist, during the Cold War? If so, things may be looking better in Gaza soon.

      *for exceptionally small values of clever

    34. address my envelope, lips! said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:58

      *sigh* There’s everything wrong with Virginia. I can’t work out why these lovely lovely people (seriously, I haven’t met an asshole since I moved here) can be racist without thinking and keep voting in Republicans whose contempt for 90% of Virginia and its needs is palpable.

    35. fabbo said,

      December 12, 2011 at 21:59

      I wonder how long it’s going to take for GOPpers to decide they need a new mascot once they figure out that elephants are (gasp!) vegetarians.

      I nominate…WOLVERINES! Or weasels.

    36. Smut Clyde said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:00

      Isn’t this how we got California?

      IIRC you used the “Afghan gambit”, whereby a band of possibly-legal Anglo immigrants staged a revolution against the central government and declared independence as the Bear Republic, which they then invited the US to annex.

    37. UKBristolDave said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:01

      Oh, if we are doing the long game then there is no such thing as the USA. You’ve only been around since 1776.

    38. Thread Bear said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:01

      according to my mother, you can buy a ‘chifforobe’ at ikea…she came up with that word after remembering ‘what the colored guy broke up for the girl in to kill a mockingbird?’

      We had to read that book in high school. I remember there was a longer discussion among my classmates about the word chifforobe and what the hell a chifforobe was than about anything actually important about that book.

    39. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:02

      Red Meat would be a great name for an S&M club?

      Or….

    40. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:03

      now she just used the phrases ‘the i-chat’ (which is really fb) and leaving a message on ‘the message machine’ in back to back sentences…

    41. Tom Robinson said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:04

      I”d be glad to help bust up that chifforobe for yer ma, bbkf.

    42. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:05

      I remember there was a longer discussion among my classmates about the word chifforobe and what the hell a chifforobe was than about anything actually important about that book.

      It’s a portmanteau of chiffonier and wardrobe.

      It also played a prominent role in Pride of der Nazis the Yankees. Gehrig’s mom had a chiffofetish.

      A chiff-o-tine would be cool.

    43. Smut Clyde said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:06

      One could argue that ethnic cleansing is a foundational value for the US, so Gingrich and Huckabee are merely returning to tradition when they set out to make it a key element of US foreign policy.

    44. Bitter Scribe said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:06

      There’s nothing wrong with Illinois except for its government. And the Bears.

    45. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:08

      that is 47 minutes of my life i will never get back…

      also:
      I”d be glad to help bust up that chifforobe for yer ma, bbkf.

      i’m assuming this is code for something…and if you mean destruction and violence, then yes…if it is an innuendo…gross!

    46. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:09

      I was left behind!

      Here’s teh funnay. Accidents caused by having beverages in yer mouf are NOT my responsibility.
      .

    47. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:09

      There’s nothing wrong with Illinois except for its government. And the Bears.

      And the pizza.

    48. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:10

      I”d be glad to help bust up that chifforobe for yer ma, bbkf.

      Careful with that, that’s a good way to sprain your credenza.

    49. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:14

      Careful with that, that’s a good way to sprain your credenza.

      It’s well-armoired.

    50. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:15

      The so-called “Texans” are a made-up people. In the case of Texan women, I would add make that “heavily made-up”.

      Not my mom! Then again, she’s Pentecostal.
      .

    51. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:17

      Oh lay off the pizza already actor.

    52. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:17

      Jeffraham, woulda owed me a keyboard.

      SPACE POOH!

    53. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:21

      SPACE POOH!

      I’d fight a chicken with hands. A REAL chicken.
      .

    54. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:27

      Oh lay off the pizza already actor.
      A REAL chicken

      i am trying to lay off things like pizza and instead choose more things like real chicken so i would appeciate no talk of pizza or other good things…

    55. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:32

      i am trying to lay off things like pizza and instead choose more things like real chicken so i would appeciate no talk of pizza or other good things…

      bacon

    56. Thread Bear said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:32

      Tonight I will be having a pizza with real chicken on it.

    57. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:32

      Oooooooh, I may need to watch that again.

    58. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:33

      bacon

      you are truly evil…

    59. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:34

      Oooooooh, I may need to watch that again.

      I have easily watched the One-L-Two-N one 100 times.
      .

    60. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:34

      bacon

      you are truly evil…

      And I didn’t even have to go to “I’m having bacon-fried BBQ chicken pizza”…

    61. bbkf said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:34

      Tonight I will be having a pizza with real chicken on it.

      well, i will be concocting something that is low carbish, high fibery and full of veggies…sigh…i knew the good times with christmas goodies would be taking their toll…

    62. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:35

      Jeffraham, your scooter would fit right in here in Paris. They’re all over the place.

      The riders seem to have no apparent fear of death. I had several pass me between the lanes on the freeway.

    63. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:35

      Stealing Tintin’s shtick on the very same blog is created by Cerberus.

      Well played!

      And no, I am not getting out of this boat, even if you fucking triple-dog-dare me.

      So. Many. Posts. It’s a holiday miracle, I tellsya!

    64. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:35

      I’d fight a chicken with hands. A REAL chicken.

      GASP

      You’re PETER GRIFFIN!

    65. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:39

      Oh, and I always preferred this Red Meat.

    66. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:39

      Jeffraham, your scooter would fit right in here in Paris. They’re all over the place.

      Oh, I know. Most of the rest of the world understands the utility and practicality, but most of the rest of the world is paying at least $7/gal. for gasoline, too.

      Lane splitting, even where legal, is idiotic. Have lots of life and health coverage if you’re going to attempt this, please.

      You’re PETER GRIFFIN!

      Rick Parry, y’mean. Only I don’t think Parry’s that bright.
      .

    67. Smut Clyde said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:41

      i would appeciate no talk of pizza or other good things…
      Breakfast: feral pork sausage. Fried with tomato & haloumi. Coffee, not fried.

      even if you fucking triple-dog-dare me.

      What else do you expect from Cerberus?

    68. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:45

      I was in Paris around this time last year. Saw a couple on a scooter get hit by a car in a busy intersection downtown.

      The rider was able to walk, but he was limping pretty bad.

      The female passenger was laying in the street screaming in French and holding her (presumably broken) ankle. I didn’t want to try to move her, not knowing how bad she was injured.

      So Idiot-boy here was standing in one of the busiest intersections in Paris directing traffic around the whole mess until some Gendarmes showed up and called the paramedics.

    69. vacuumslayer Googles that for You said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:57

      Fried with tomato & haloumi.

      Marry me. I’ll take Frau Doktorin on, I will!

    70. S. cerevisiae said,

      December 12, 2011 at 22:59

      There’s nothing wrong with New York.

      Traffic?

    71. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:04

      There’s nothing wrong with New York.

      Traffic?

      And Bloomberg.

      And the “Today” show. And all the other morning shows. Also too.

      And actor lives there.

    72. Chris said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:04

      Mike Huckabee says the same thing, IIRC–no such thing as Palestinians.

      Yep. He also thought the West Bank should belong to Israel and if the Palestinians needed a homeland, they should just move to Egypt or Jordan and carve it out of their territory. Hellllllo, Trail of Tears. Helllllllo, recreating the exact same problem just a few miles from where it is now.

      Someone on Balloon Juice once said that Huckabee was the kind of politician they could easily imagine loading non-Christians onto cattle cars, which to me really captures the essence of the guy. Apparently, Newt Gingrich is now on that bandwagon too. But Huckabee would do it because he’s a True Believer… Newt would do it for ratings.

    73. Major Kong said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:14

      Actually my holy book clearly states that the whole region belongs to me.

      I am, however, a reasonable person. I’ll settle for two blocks of prime beachfront property in Tel Aviv.

    74. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:18

      And actor lives there.

      Precisely why all those things you list as bugs magically become features: I make up for them.

    75. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:19

      I’ll settle for two blocks of prime beachfront property in Tel Aviv.

      And have those messy flotillas show up unannounced?

    76. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:32

      I love flotillas. Especially with hot salsa.

    77. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:36

      I love flotillas. Especially with hot salsa.

      Flotillas! Flotillas!

      You know, like in the Tournament of Roses Parade!

    78. Pupienus said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:48

      Flotillas! Flotillas!

      You know, like in the Tournament of Roses Parade!

      No no no, those are big floats, flotillas are the small version.

    79. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:51

      No no no, those are big floats, flotillas are the small version.

      I thought those were flotets?

    80. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:51

      Are we back to sinkers and floaters already?

    81. actor212 said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:55

      Are we back to sinkers and floaters already?

      I guess sinkers didn’t make it into the parade.

    82. Whale Chowder said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:55

      Are we back to sinkers and floaters already?

      Really, did we ever leave?

    83. Jacob Singer said,

      December 12, 2011 at 23:56

      OT, just wanted to drop in and add my kudos to Cerberus for these fantastic posts. I will have a celebratory POOP for thee this very evening!

    84. Horny Asian Guy said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:10

      Frottirras?

    85. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:12

      I suspect beer is indicated. I need a beer fund.
      .

    86. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:27

      Are we back to sinkers and floaters already?

      flotsam! and if n_b enters his gynocopter we’ll have jetsam!

    87. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:28

      I suspect beer is indicated

      beer is ALWAYS indicated…

    88. Looch said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:32

      Sinker or floater? You decide.

      http://2012.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/12/right-wing-radio-jock-offers-newt-1-million-to-drop-out.php?ref=fpb

      Go. See the alien wife-thing of Newt.

      NOT OF THIS PLANET

    89. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:36

      NOT OF THIS PLANET

      It was originally of this planet, and was then killed, mummified, and reanimated. That’s the only thing that can explain its hideous pallor. Well, that or the whole otherwordly thing, but what are you going to believe — something real like reanimated mummies, or some silly thing like aliens. Yeah, as if.

    90. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:42

      Go. See the alien wife-thing of Newt.

      I think this is some of her best work.
      .

    91. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:45

      My gynocopter left me for a four-rotor Sikorsky.

    92. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:49

      Go. See the alien wife-thing of Newt.

      I am waiting for someone to take one of those Newt-&-Callista loving-couple poses and phop in the Southern-Gothic pitchfork.

    93. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:51

      My gynocopter left me for a four-rotor Sikorsky.

      that’s a shame…but you know what they say…it’s not the size of your rotors, it’s how you spin them…’

    94. Looch said,

      December 13, 2011 at 0:52

      Yeah, as if.

      OK, fine.

      It is not of human flesh, whether from this planet or another.

      It is NOT HUMAN.

    95. Anonymous said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:00

      i am trying to lay off things like pizza

      which part of pizza are you concerned about? ’cause if you’re not doing some sort of low-carb thing a margherita pizza (just tomato, basil, and mozzarella, and more emphasis on the first two ingredients) might be a nice way to move away from gooey fatty deep-dish…

    96. tigris said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:00

      Jeez, Israelis’ own holy book says their patriarch came from Ur, which is NOT where Palestine is i.e. even in their own mythology they are interlopers. Plus there are multiple maps and mentions of Palestine that predate the modern state of Israel’s creation, do they expect people to just ignore centuries upon centuries of proof that contradicts their “IMAGINARY PEEPULS!” claim?

      And BOO to OBS for beating me to posting Red Meat comic. BOO I SAY.

    97. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:02

      which part of pizza are you concerned about?

      crust mostly…i have type 2 diabetes so have to watch the carbs…i don’t have it that often, and there are some pretty decent low carb options out there, but holy crap, making diabetic friendly food is a pain in the ass…

    98. vacuumslayer Googles that for You said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:02

      Her hair and skin are the exact same color. Creepy.

    99. Bitter Scribe said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:03

      Chicago pizza rules.

      But I will concede New York hot dogs are better.

    100. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:04

      And BOO to OBS for beating me to posting Red Meat comic. BOO I SAY.

      I am diabolical in my scheming.

    101. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:05

      Jeez, Israelis’ own holy book says their patriarch came from Ur, which is NOT where Palestine is i.e. even in their own mythology they are interlopers. Plus there are multiple maps and mentions of Palestine that predate the modern state of Israel’s creation, do they expect people to just ignore centuries upon centuries of proof that contradicts their “IMAGINARY PEEPULS!” claim?

      holy crap…you should check out the comments…one dood was like, ‘well, there’s a palestine on the map in my bible’ and one commentor called him a stupid lying twelve year old because the MAPS IN THE BIBBLE CHANGE TO REFLECT MODERN DAY SO HIS BIBBLE IS WRONG AND EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT!!! and then they all got really snotty and icky…

    102. Spearhafoc, who is a lousy dancer said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:13

      She’s obviously the Rule #63 version of The Man Who Laughs.

    103. Maddog said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:17

      Everyone knows there is no such thing as a “Texan”. They are just a part of the larger American community, who happen to live in Texas.

      American?

      Nice try… but I’ve never seen any mention of an ‘American’ tribe in the Bible or any early Classical writings.

      Ergo, made-up people, made-up country. Wow, Newt has really simplified the evaluation of First Nations land claims!

      Just because you killed the owners and squatted in their house doesn’t mean you own it you know….

      -K

    104. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:17

      It is not of human flesh, whether from this planet or another.

      It is NOT HUMAN.

      “The People: Different Flesh After All?”

    105. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:17

      She’s obviously the Rule #63 version of The Man Who Laughs.

      ya know…when a person is known for ALWAYS linking to hot red-heads, a little warning on that link would have been nice…that is creeeeeepy…

    106. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:24

      Btw, hot tip for Spear: American Horror Story…hot maid…google it.

    107. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:25

      Hot “tip of the spear”? Hmmm.
      .

    108. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:27

      Hot Redhead. To cleanse the palate….

    109. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:27

      Asparagus is yummy.

    110. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:30

      Hot redhead.

    111. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:33

      Asparagus is yummy.
      On beer-dough pizza.
      With feral pork sausages.

    112. Spearhafoc, who is a lousy dancer said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:34

      It won’t let me post!

    113. Spearhafoc, who is a lousy dancer said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:36

      Oh, now it does.

      I guess it just doesn’t want to link to that picture of a hot redhead*.

      *It’s Rorschach from Watchmen (who of course, is a redhead) narrating a story involving fire (hence the heat). Ha ha ha. I is a funny person.

    114. Whale Chowder said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:42

      It is not of human flesh, whether from this planet or another.

      She’s deep in the uncanny valley. Almost, but not quite, perfectly human looking.

    115. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:46

      Btw, hot tip for Spear: American Horror Story…hot maid…google it.

      he would totally dig her…

    116. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 1:49

      Hate to do it, but… it’s Meezer Monday!
      .

    117. Snorghagen said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:14

      Hot redhead… but not welcome in Leesburg.

    118. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:17

      “bbkf said,
      December 13, 2011 at 1:46

      Btw, hot tip for Spear: American Horror Story…hot maid…google it.

      he would totally dig her…”

      Do I lie?

    119. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:18

      “Snorghagen said,
      December 13, 2011 at 2:14

      Hot redhead… but not welcome in Leesburg.”

      You can defeat him if you play the most rocking song in the world.

    120. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:18

      Time to break out the popcorn- gonna be a bloodbath! A lymphbath at the very least.

    121. Snorghagen said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:31

      Beck has long made it clear he disapproves of Gingrich, whose main sin in Beck’s eyes appears to be citing Theodore Roosevelt as one of his favorite former presidents.

      It’s all been downhill since McKinley.

    122. pearloftheprairie said,

      December 13, 2011 at 2:40

      there’s nothing wrong with Colorado…AT ALL! (All right, if you could just burn CO Springs out like a precancerous wart…)

      Oh, Ant…as a native of Denver and now in the Pitstop of the Prairie there is plenty wrong with Southern Colorado. “Support Our Troops” stickers are still here in full display and three to a bumper.

    123. pearloftheprairie said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:17

      *sigh* broke the thread. Back to lurking.

    124. address my envelope, lips! said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:23

      Nah, it’s just pinin’ for the fjords.

      (bows out hastily to avoid being hit)

    125. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:29

      *sigh* broke the thread. Back to lurking.

      Pearl…come back Pearl…

    126. vacuumslayer said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:33

      Pearl, wear it as a badge of honor. Do you know how many threads I’ve grievously injured?

    127. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:42

      Pearl, wear it as a badge of honor. Do you know how many threads I’ve grievously injured?

      I think the only thing which can possibly kill a thread here is a new post.

    128. Looch said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:44

      All threads are really Zombee threads. You can’t kill ‘em and they just keep shambling along…

    129. Looch said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:46

      And I do not like this “no refresh after post” bullshit. I do not like it at all.

    130. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 3:59

      And I do not like this “no refresh after post” bullshit. I do not like it at all.

      Looch likes it not the unrefresh
      Looch likes it not at all
      Sadly the No unrefreshes
      Refresh us all Sadlys call

    131. acrannymint said,

      December 13, 2011 at 4:00

      For a historian Newt has never read Herodotus

    132. Pupienus said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:11

      I have seen PENIScopters but never, thank gawd, a gynocopter. Eeew, do they drip stuff?

    133. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:26

      I have seen PENIScopters but never, thank gawd, a gynocopter. Eeew, do they drip stuff?

      You know, some of us like gynocopters.

    134. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:33

      You know, some of us like gynocopters.

      I remember that first set of whirling blades initiating me into the Art of Hover.

    135. Doctorb said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:33

      Remember, there was no Israel as a state — (it was) part of the Caananite Kingdom. I think we have an invented Israeli people who are in fact mainly Europeans and historically part of the European community and they had the chance to go many places for a variety of political reasons

    136. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:47

      James Caan is a fine actor in tough-guy roles, but I don’t think he deserves his own kingdom.

    137. rodert rudis said,

      December 13, 2011 at 5:57

      The first clear use of the term Palestine to refer to the region synonymous with that defined in modern times was in 5th century BC Ancient Greece.

      Wiki

    138. Another Kiwi said,

      December 13, 2011 at 6:24

      I can never get close enough to a feral pork sausage to get a fork…innim. Once they go feral they get extra sensitive.

    139. Another Kiwi said,

      December 13, 2011 at 6:25

      The McCainites are pretty wacky tho’

    140. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 6:43

      dammit…hubbkf and i wasted two nights watching ‘bag of bones’…when will we learn?!?!

      also, pierce brosnan is not aging well…i struggled watching him and i just saw a clip of him as james bond on colbert…startling!

    141. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:07

      Hildredmay Dolores’s Paneer Cheese Fizz

      Ingredients:
      4 tablespoons undead wyrm, peppered
      1 paneer cheese, glowingly swirled
      4 cups clear Port Salut cheese, herbed
      7 pounds archangel bowel
      1 jigger sesame
      1 cup mustard

      Begin praying. Place the undead wyrm into a small wok. Mash the paneer cheese with the Port Salut cheese over low heat in a skillet. Drizzle resulting potion over the undead wyrm. Pickle the archangel bowel, sesame, and the mustard. Spread the latter combination on to the former. Leave raw. Serves 1.

    142. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:14

      Also this is very funny.

    143. lobbey said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:17

      Remember, there was no Israel as a state — (it was) part of the Caananite Kingdom. I think we have an invented Israeli people who are in fact mainly Europeans and historically part of the European community and they had the chance to go many places for a variety of political reasons

      In fact they left their so called holy land a couple of thousand years ago, so fuck ‘em…..

      With respect to Newt, does he really have a chance at the nomination? the GoP are going to seriously let him run against Obama, have they gone stark raving mad? Or is there going to be an ‘accident’ involving Newt in the enxt couple of months?

    144. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:29

      Or is there going to be an ‘accident’ involving Newt in the enxt couple of months?

      Two wetsuits, a dildo and a Jesustoaster, if there is a Dog.
      .

    145. Snorghagen said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:37

      Remember, there was no Israel as a state — (it was) part of the Caananite Kingdom.

      That was before the Vegemites and Marmites spread over the land.

    146. jim said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:38

      #weeatwhatwekill

    147. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:53

      Jesustoaster, if there is a Dog.

      o.m…i am sooooo tempted to get the jesustoaster for my sister…it definitely beats the jesus nightlight and the jesus outside the u.n. building that i she gave me…

    148. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      December 13, 2011 at 7:58

      i am sooooo tempted to get the jesustoaster for my sister…

      I forgot to include in the Newtaccident fantasy the all-important hot tub, implying that electrocution might be involved, and that Pennis might also be there, trunks (at least partially) on, champagne flute in-hand.
      .

    149. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 9:15

      That was before the Vegemites and Marmites spread over the land.
      I think you will find that Vegemite and Marmite are both minerals. Varieties of ultramafic rock if memory serves, but I could be wrong.

    150. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 9:26

      I tasted Vegemite once. Wasn’t too bad as I recall but I wouldn’t go out of my way for it.

    151. John M. Burt said,

      December 13, 2011 at 9:55

      The graphic is accurate: rank & file Republicans are the elephants supplying the red meat eaten by the jackals of the party leadership.

    152. wiley the intrepid go and get some mangos said,

      December 13, 2011 at 10:33

      This guy deserves my mother— a woman who thought that whole wheat bread was a communist plot.

    153. wiley the intrepid go and get some mangos said,

      December 13, 2011 at 10:46

      You want to know what pain sufficient to want to expatriate for the chance to work in a car wash anywhere but Fort Worth, Texas, when you’re seven years old feels like? It’s having to sing the following song every morning at your militantly regimented school after singing the National Anthem along with Pat Boone, saying the Pledge of Allegiance, and saying the Lord’s Prayer:

      Texas, Our Texas
      Written by William J. Marsh and Gladys Yoakum Wright
      Composed by William J. Marsh

      Texas, Our Texas! all hail the mighty State!
      Texas, Our Texas! so wonderful so great!
      Boldest and grandest, withstanding ev’ry test
      O Empire wide and glorious, you stand supremely blest.

      Texas, O Texas! your freeborn single star,
      Sends out its radiance to nations near and far,
      Emblem of Freedom! it set our hearts aglow,
      With thoughts of San Jacinto and glorious Alamo.

      Texas, dear Texas! from tyrant grip now free,
      Shines forth in splendor, your star of destiny!
      Mother of heroes, we come your children true,
      Proclaiming our allegiance, our faith, our love for you.

      God bless you Texas! And keep you brave and strong,
      That you may grow in power and worth, throughout the ages long.
      God bless you Texas! And keep you brave and strong,
      That you may grow in power and worth, throughout the ages long.

      In the fourth grade I knew who Madelaine Murray O’Hair was and that she was the reason we didn’t have to go through that dawg-awful indoctrination ritual every single school morning, and the reason why we girls could start wearing pants to school (the school insisted they be pantsuits) instead of always having to choose between going for the shot whenever we played boys vs. girls in gym class (which we always did and being mocked mercilessly because someone saw our underwear. I was shamed and sent home from school for wearing shorts under my dress. For once, my mother defended me and tore the gym teacher a new asshole for shaming a girl for trying to act like an athlete while avoiding the bog standard shaming for having girl parts; even though she hated Ms. O’Hare (and I just kept my mouth shut about how greatful I was to her).

      Thanks elder baby boomers for ending that bullshit and letting me kick the shit out of boys in sports for a few years.

    154. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 12:57

      That was before the Vegemites and Marmites spread over the land.

      Those land mines can be tricky, it’s true.

    155. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 12:58

      James Caan is a fine actor in tough-guy roles, but I don’t think he deserves his own kingdom.

      Dude had his own planet! Ceti Alpha Six!

    156. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 14:26

      Caaaaaaaaaaan!!!!!!!

    157. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 14:31

      Jon-a-than! Jon-a-than! Jon-a-than! Jon-a-than!

    158. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 16:36

      Since I’m here all alone, the end of the best movie ever made: http://youtu.be/IguzgGx7y-8

    159. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 16:55

      Haven’t seen that one in a long time.

    160. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:05

      I must respectfully take issue with the “best movie ever made” statement:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_XPnBec2gcE

    161. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:13

      Jesus. People really do go with their hobbies don’t they? Why am I not surprised that Major Kong picks the bomber movie and N__B picks the death-sport movie?

    162. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:17

      Six degrees of Sterling Hayden. The best movie ever made is “The Godfather.”

    163. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:31

      Jesus. People really do go with their hobbies don’t they? Why am I not surprised that Major Kong picks the bomber movie and N__B picks the death-sport movie?

      Match the movie to the S,N commenter!
      Godzilla
      Heavy Metal
      El Topo
      The Wizard of OZ
      Mad Max: Road Warrior
      The Bridges of Madison County
      Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
      the Brotherhood of the Wolf
      Highlander II: the quickening
      Breakin’ II: Electric Boogaloo
      Cool Runnings
      Better Off Dead
      Ghostbusters

    164. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:35

      Helmut Monotreme said

      *whew*

      You left off Deep Throat, so I’m free.

    165. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:35

      Hmmmm, greatest movie ever made….hmmmmm….

      Imma say The Princess Bride

    166. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:37

      i am sooooo tempted to get the jesustoaster for my sister…

      I love the jesustoaster math. The ad says that you can buy 3 jesustoasters for just $75. It also says that if you buy three jesustoasters you get a virginmarytoaster free, but that deal will cost you $95.85

    167. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:40

      The ad says that you can buy 3 jesustoasters for just $75. It also says that if you buy three jesustoasters you get a virginmarytoaster free, but that deal will cost you $95.85

      For that price, the damn virgin better come and make me a tuna melt herself.

    168. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:44

      From FOX News

      People get drunk. People have sex. You can’t explain it.

    169. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:45

      The best movie ever made is “The Godfather.”

      I first saw that movie with my parents at the drive in when I was 10.

      I was checking my bed for horse heads for a week after that.

    170. Pryme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:50

      The best movie ever made is “The Godfather.”

      “It insists upon itself.” — Peter Griffin

    171. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:52

      “Quick! Get me Detective Frank Drebbin!”

    172. Chris said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:52

      The best movie ever made is “The Godfather.”

      Better than “The Godfather Part II”?

      Going to go with Star Wars myself. Big surprise I’m sure…

    173. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:52

      People get drunk. People have sex. You can’t explain it.

      They spent all that money on a study for that? Jimmy Buffet figured that out years ago.

    174. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:53

      They spent all that money on a study for that?

      And FOX breathlessly reported it.

    175. Pryme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:54

      I have favorites based on genre and decade; very few of which have been mentioned here.

    176. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:56

      Better than “The Godfather Part II”?

      I grew up in a Sicilian neighborhood, so let me weigh in here.

      I think 2 is better than the original, but the original was, well, so original, it’s like how many people love Episode IV: A New Hope, but EpVI is much, much better.

      The first movie was required viewing, over and over, mostly because, you know, many of da guys was portrayed in it. Part II? Not so much.

      Me, I enjoyed the backstory in Part II more than the contemporary (because many of the incidents were based on real life stuff that the local crew knew about or was involved with.)

    177. vacuumslayertse said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:56

      Those Jesus toasters are pretty disappointing. Why can’t the toast spring out of a big Jesus-head? Now, that would be impressive.

    178. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 17:58

      Best movie eer made.

    179. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:00

      I agree that Part II is outstanding. But, no Brando.

    180. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:04

      I agree that Part II is outstanding. But, no Brando

      - Brando, + DeNiro, is pretty close to a wash in my book, but you have a point.

      Which brings up The Freshman…

    181. Bitter Scribe said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:05

      Wiley, I’m a little late asking this, but…how the hell did you ever have time to learn anything?

    182. Chris said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:11

      Me, I enjoyed the backstory in Part II more than the contemporary

      Me too – preferred it to both Part I and the rest of Part II (still haven’t seen III).

      The whole thing’s pretty good, but there’s just something more engaging about watching the Corleone crew as working stiffs trying to make ends meet than when they’re rich and powerful and living in mansions.

    183. wiley the intrepid go and get some mangos said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:13

      People get drunk. People have sex. You can’t explain it.

      Funny you mention that, because I was just thinking that getting drunk might make it more likely for a person to fall down. Does anyone have a link for that? Seen a study? Or review?

    184. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:17

      still haven’t seen III

      Don’t. You’ll ruin any goodwill you have towards Coppola.

    185. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:19

      The whole thing’s pretty good, but there’s just something more engaging about watching the Corleone crew as working stiffs trying to make ends meet than when they’re rich and powerful and living in mansions.

      On the other hand, there’s a lot to be said (it’s true of sections of II, as well) for the metaphor between that era and the current corporatocracy.

      For example, the way Hyman Roth literally slices up Cuba…

    186. wiley the intrepid go and get some mangos said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:26

      Thanks, Substance. I was just cleaning out the fridge and I have 8 pounds of archangel bowl laying around &

      How did I ever have have time to learn anything? I could read before I went to school. Didn’t go to kindergarten. I bugged my parenting units to tell me what street signs said and to play reading games I made up when we were on the road. With that and cereal boxes I figured out.

      The only teacher who didn’t love me was my first grade teacher. She hated me. Before school started the parent and child had to meet with the teacher. Mrs. (Preggers) Gray asked me to spell a word that sounded exactly like the word for the color “red.” Feeling proud of my ability to read AND spell, I said, “r-e-d”. She said, “I meant the other “read.”" It was clear from the start that this woman was teaching school out of love for children and helping to nurture developing minds

      We had to really moronic things like walk up to a chart and point to the color yelow—-

      I’ll write about it more on my own blog. Jeez. I’ve been reading my writing, editing it, writing more, and looking for stuff I’ve written for six hours. Soon, clouds is going to install ubuntu and kubuntu on my computer and the migration will begin in earnest.

      I got some stories about Pregger Bitch and Mrs. Bolton who spent most of every class preaching fire and brimstone. Apparently she had some brain glitch that kept her stuck in Revelations for the better part of EVERY school day. Certifiable.

    187. wiley the intrepid go and get some mangos said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:27

      as you can see, i’m kinda burnt out on the editing stuff

    188. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:29

      unny you mention that, because I was just thinking that getting drunk might make it more likely for a person to fall down. Does anyone have link for that? Seen a study? Or review?

      Scientific research

    189. Pryme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:31

      Take two and cuddle in the morning: http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/medical_examiner/2011/12/health_benefits_of_sex_are_they_for_real_.single.html

    190. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:31

      Scientific research

      Y’know, you laugh, but…

    191. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:33

      People get drunk. People have sex. You can’t explain it.

      whoa…those peeps over at fox better slow it the fuck down…someone is likely to get a brain injury with crack reporting like that…

    192. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:35

      (still haven’t seen III).

      do. not. watch.

    193. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:39

      Not that masturbation is so bad. A 1988 study found that genital self-stimulation increases pain thresholds and produces an analgesic effect in women, and a 2003 study linked masturbation to a reduction in prostate-cancer risk, which the researchers attributed to ejaculation frequency. But a subsequent study failed to confirm the relationship and, no doubt to the chagrin of many men, concluded that prostate cancer risk was unrelated to a man’s ejaculation count. (Some studies suggest a link between sex and breast cancer, too: One found a reduced risk of breast cancer among women who’d had multiple sexual partners, though another found that women who’d had children fathered by different partners did not have a lessened risk of the disease.)

      this may be so, but don’t let that crazy sheila chick from canada find out…then she’ll have to rant again about how sex toys and masturbation take you away from jesus and your partner!!!

    194. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:42

      A 1988 study found that genital self-stimulation increases pain thresholds and produces an analgesic effect in women, and a 2003 study linked masturbation to a reduction in prostate-cancer risk, which the researchers attributed to ejaculation frequency

      I’ll be damned. And here I thought it just felt good…

    195. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:46

      sex toys and masturbation take you away from jesus and your partner!!!

      What if you masturbate with a cross-dildo? Or a Jesuildo?

    196. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:53

      “sex toys and masturbation take you away from jesus and your partner!!!

      What if you masturbate with a cross-dildo? Or a Jesuildo?”

      As I mentioned last week, arms and hands are where they are for a reason. Intelligent design that.

    197. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:53

      What if you masturbate with a cross-dildo? Or a Jesuildo?

      all sex toys are BAD! your relationship with your spouse should be enough to bring you to climax!!! because that’s the way god meant for it to be…man, i pity the women whose husbands are inept or uncaring…sheila must make them feel real good about themselves…

    198. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 18:54

      As I mentioned last week, arms and hands are where they are for a reason. Intelligent design that.

      at first i read that as ‘arms and legs’ and i was all ?!?!?!?

    199. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:06

      testing…testing…

    200. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:07

      “at first i read that as ‘arms and legs’ and i was all ?!?!?!?”

      Well, I AM a leg man, but…………..

    201. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:11

      Well, I AM a leg man, but…………..

      You’ve never had a toe job?

    202. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:21

      Well, I AM a Lego man, but…………..

    203. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:23

      Writing today’s date makes me feel like I’m a four-year-old learning to count…….or I’m married to Michael Corleone learning English in Sicily: 12-13-11.

    204. bbkf said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:26

      …….or I’m married to Michael Corleone learning English in Sicily: 12-13-11.

      don’t start the car!!!

    205. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:48

      Indiana Hoosiers.

      This is who we are.

      This is what we do.

      IU vs. KY…..The Shot Heard Round the World

    206. Pryme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:49

      It’s beginning to look a lot like MOTHER OF ALL CREATURES BIG & SMALL!!!

    207. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 19:56

      What if you masturbate with a cross-dildo?

      First my dildo was just humorless, now it’s downright cross.

    208. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:10

      IU vs. KY…..The Shot Heard Round the World

      Those people are very excited about that tall man throwing that ball through the big ring with the strings on it, especially with the mean blue guys trying to stop him.

    209. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:10

      “IU vs. KY…..The Shot Heard Round the World”

      Big deal. I was there when U.S. Reed hit the shot from half-court to eliminate the defending champs in the NCAAs:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-TtGo8CwUM

    210. Thread Bear said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:17

      IU vs. KY

      Obviously nobody is drinking there because the study Fox news showed us indicates that the IU device and perhaps even the KY would not be involved if people were drinking.

    211. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:18

      That day was awesome, smedley. There were 4 big upsets that day and they all came right after the other on television.

      IU won the NCAA championship that year, blowing everybody away.

      Isiah Thomas…..March 30, 1981 “And a Little Child Led Them

      The day Reagan was shot, actually.

    212. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:20

      Ronald Reagan…….wow.

      Good times.

      Those were the days.

    213. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:21

      It’s beginning to look a lot like MOTHER OF ALL CREATURES BIG & SMALL!!!

      Rats, I was expecting a link to an article about our protoplasm soup ancestor.

    214. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:23

      What’s an IU? Is that where you don’t owe me?

    215. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:24

      The Spaniards win the war on christmas: http://wonkette.com/458166/foreigners-delight-in-sarah-palin-pooping-on-nativity-set

    216. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:25

      Rats, I was expecting a link to an article about our protoplasm soup ancestor.

      My name is LUCA. I live on the second floor.

    217. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:25

      Indiana Hoosiers.
      This is who we are.

      How nice for you. Could you stand downwind?

    218. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:31

      What’s an IU? Is that where you don’t owe me?

      Amazingly idiotic question, nevertheless, IU is where they have one of the best business schools in existence.

      Also, it’s where #1 ranked basketball teams go to die.

    219. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:32

      IU is where they have one of the best business schools in existence.

      Interesting.

      When you reach the level of Stern School, perhaps I’ll give you a job interview for my gopher.

    220. tigris said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:35

      Rats, I was expecting a link to an article about our protoplasm soup ancestor.

      Stanislaw Lem was a GENIUS.

    221. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:36

      Stern School? Does the faculty consist of cross nuns?

    222. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:38

      Does the faculty consist of cross nuns?

      Hot cross nuns: wimples and bikinis.

    223. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:38

      Stern School is where people go when they don’t get in to IU’s B-school.

      Stern hangs up posters in the Kelly school lobby urging students to consider them as their fallback choice.

    224. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:38

      Stanislaw Lem was a GENIUS.

      I have a poetry-generating robot right here:

      Rebelliously in the expecting forest
      A finished redtooth triggerfish outclasses his sense
      Because it is awful

      Okay, still working on it.

    225. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:39

      Stern School is where people go when they don’t get in to IU’s B-school.

      Yes, of course. That’s why we’re perenially ranked right behind Stanford and Wharton at number three.

    226. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:41

      Stern School? Does the faculty consist of cross nuns?

      Stern’s a Jewish name, so more like annoyed rabbis.

    227. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:44

      Thanks for killing my fantasy, actor.

    228. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:44

      Hot cross nuns: wimples and bikinis.

      I’d suddenly believe in corporal punishment

    229. Bloom said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:52

      That’s why we’re perenially ranked right behind Stanford and Wharton at number three.

      “We’re”?

      A cursory google search shows you to be a failed New York actor.

      So what’s with the “we’re” shit?

      Sounds like you have self-actualization issues with your over-eager need to argue.

      A-hole.

    230. Major Kong said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:52

      Nobody from Indiana has ever been able to tell me exactly what a “Hoosier” is supposed to be.

      Sure, a Buckeye may be a poisonous nut, but at least we know what our nickname actually means.

    231. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:52

      Thanks for killing my fantasy, actor.

      I trust I’ve since made up for that.

    232. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:53

      A cursory google search shows you to be a failed New York actor.

      So what’s with the “we’re” shit?

      Not so much failed, DenDen, as much more successful elsewhere.

    233. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:53

      Yes, of course. That’s why we’re perenially ranked right behind Stanford and Wharton at number three.

      You’re arguing about quality of business schools?

      This country would be a vastly better place if they were torched and their MBA graduates were forced to break rocks for the rest of their lives.

      I bet the troll who-shant-be-named has an MBA.

    234. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:54

      Nobody from Indiana has ever been able to tell me exactly what a “Hoosier” is supposed to be.

      You know, Horton, hears?

      Indianians can’t spell for shit, however. It shows in their B-school grads.

    235. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:55

      I bet the troll who-shant-be-named has an MBA.

      A shitty MBA, you mean.

    236. jim said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:55

      The real best movie of all time?

      There is only one possible choice.

      It’s a timeless tale of epic conflict, one that tears at the heart – because both protagonists are known & loved by all.

      A saga of combat mythological in scale, gargantuan enough to shock & amaze the entire world, yet able to zoom in to portray the unremembered intimate moment from one ordinary day that might be a motif for humanity itself.

      A parable dancing on a tightwire between tragedy & comedy, mesmerizing the viewer with the beauty of that dance.

      BOOKMARK IT, LIBS!

    237. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:55

      This country would be a vastly better place if they were torched and their MBA graduates were forced to break rocks for the rest of their lives. locked inside at the time.

      Now you see the violence inherent in the fixing that for you.

    238. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:58

      locked inside at the time.

      I have no problem whatsoever with that fixxoring.

    239. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 20:59

      This harsh reaction to the MBA neglects to mention the fact that MBAs are very useful when applying for jobs that require an MBA.

    240. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:00

      POOP
      ~

    241. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:00

      MBAs are very useful when applying for jobs that require an MBA.

      Such as jobs supervising MBAs or teaching in MBA programs.

    242. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:00

      This country would be a vastly better place if they were torched and their MBA graduates were forced to break rocks for the rest of their lives.

      When I attended, we had to take a full year of business ethics classes as part of a rounded academic career.

      I was sad to see the lessons didn’t stick universally.

    243. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:01

      it is the first part of a question asked by pimps everywhere “Hoosier daddy?”

    244. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:01

      ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
      December 13, 2011 at 21:00

      POOP
      ~

      AHEM: http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/35954.html#comment-1248397

    245. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:02

      “I trust I’ve since made up for that.”

      Sadly, no. I am at work(!), and when I click your link, I get the snowy winter wonderland of blockpage. I shall click it again when I am at home. But, for now, a premature thank you.

    246. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:02

      it is the first part of a question asked by pimps everywhere “Hoosier daddy?”

      Nah, it’s because they all wear panty hose.

    247. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:03

      jobs that require an MBA.

      I’d be fine with there not being anymore “Human Resource Managers” around, and with the business schools gone we won’t need the “Associate Professor of Business Administration” jobs either.

    248. Aunt Acid said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:03

      I think “Stern School” is a euphemism for the things you learn at the “back of the boat” IYKWIM

    249. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:04

      Rats, I was expecting a link to an article about our protoplasm soup ancestor.
      I am astonished that BBBB has missed an opportunity to mention Ubbo-Sathla.
      Also astonished how many things that New Scientist article managed to get wrong.

    250. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:04

      Such as jobs supervising MBAs or teaching in MBA programs.

      Damn you N_B!

    251. smedley said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:04

      Business ethics? The business school at U. of Texas is named for a used car salesman…………

    252. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:05

      New Fred

    253. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:06

      I think “Stern School” is a euphemism for the things you learn at the “back of the boat” IYKWIM

      I didn’t say we were a *good* business school, just that we were one of the best in the country.

    254. Substance McGravitas said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:06

      The business school at U. of Texas is named for a used car salesman…

      Crazy Eddie’s MBA Schoolathon sounds about right.

    255. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:07

      The Spaniards win the war on christmas

      I’ll bet Rich Lowry has one that he uses for masturbatory purposes.

      I bet the troll who-shant-be-named has an MBA.

      I bet he’s an MRA.

    256. Whale Chowder said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:07

      I think e-peen measurement is a couple doors down. You two want to take it over there?

    257. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:08

      The Spaniards win the war on christmas
      That is Catalonia, not Spain.

    258. Pryme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:08

      A shitty MBA, you mean.

      Well, SAW-REEEE, but not all of us have connections or trade skills to fall back on (unless you count landscaping, which most don’t)…and TBOH, it’s probably the only degree that fits with what I’m doing…

    259. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:09

      I bet the troll who-shant-be-named has an MBA.

      I bet he’s an MRA.

      I bet he stockpiles MREs

    260. N__B said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:10

      That is Catalonia, not Spain.

      I’m short on caffeine and near-Catalonic.

    261. Helmut Monotreme said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:12

      What does the Moldovian Basketball Association have to do with anything anyway? And why is it so influential?

    262. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:18

      Well, SAW-REEEE, but not all of us have connections or trade skills to fall back on (unless you count landscaping, which most don’t)…

      I’m told there’s a very old profession nearly anyone can take up…as for landscaping, TMI!

      Unless you’re offering photos.

    263. actor212 said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:19

      That is Catalonia, not Spain.

      I’m short on caffeine and near-Catalonic.

      No no, Catalonia. You know, where the Sears Big Book comes from.

    264. The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:30

      From the sidebar of that same New Scientist page: Police can identify suspect’s eye colour from DNA. Why haven’t they always been able to do this? Short of single-nucleotide substitutions like sickle-cell or cystic fibrosis, shouldn’t this be the absolute easiest thing to determine from DNA?

    265. Smut Clyde said,

      December 13, 2011 at 21:49

      Short of single-nucleotide substitutions like sickle-cell or cystic fibrosis, shouldn’t this be the absolute easiest thing to determine from DNA?

      Evidently not:

      The actual number of genes that contribute to eye color is currently unknown, but there are a few likely candidates. A study in Rotterdam (2009) found that it was possible to predict the color of eyes with more than 90% accuracy for brown and blue, using just six SNPs (from six genes).[13]

    266. jim said,

      December 13, 2011 at 22:19

      Horowitz carrying water for both anti-Palestine & anti-climate-science assholes with the same “witty” rant = I CAN HAZ OWN SHOW ON FOX PLZ?

      Also, a true “heh, indeed” – according to my lying eyes, the monolith of bluster & butthurt that is redmeatconservative blog has even fewer comments than MINE does. It’s a bona fide Interwebs goose-egg farm.

      A WINR@R ISREAL

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