Oct
12

Not Gonna Be Foiled Again




Posted at 20:50 by Tintin

Shorter Peter Kirsanow, America’s Shittiest Website™:
Today’s Questions for the President

    • Hey, look, finally a reason to declare war on Iran!

  • ‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™

    653 Comments »

    1. Mark D said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:50

      FIRST!

    2. Bozo the Cocksucker said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:53

      SHUT THE FUCK UP

    3. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:56

      Neocon boner alert.

      Much more fun for them than trying to defend Wall St.

      Bombs away!
      ~

    4. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:56

      Animation!

    5. Mark D said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:59

      Now that I got that outta the way …

      The minute I read about the plot, a few thoughts came to mind:

      1. Why do I not believe what Holder is telling us? Not sure why, but I just don’t. At all.

      2. The rightwing is going to have a collective fapping at the thought of maybe possibly bombing Iran.

      3. Even though nothing gets the right more excited than the idea of bombing the shit out of brown people, they’d STILL bitch and moan about how Obama needs to get permission from Congress because only Democrats need to do that; GOP presidents can do whatever the fuck they want militarily without asking anyone.

      Should be interesting to see how this plays out …

      (* I actually agree that the Obama team, while having some latitude due to CiC powers, should’ve gotten Congressional authority for actions in Libya. But that’s for another time … )

    6. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 20:59

      Oh good grief. You just knew the drumbeat for war was going to start a-pounding*

      *VmasturbationR

    7. paleotectonics said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:03

      Well, actor, for Christ’s sake, President Oblackma is ever so, almost invisibly, slightly slowing down our existing wars. Kinda. A bit.

      Meantime, there are whole other nations of people who don’t belong to Pastor Jeffrass’ church who need to be bombed. Iran is the next closest.

    8. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:04

      Also too, teh DEA informer was pretending to be a Messican drug cartel d00d. Screw teh border fence, it’s time to invade Mexico and not in that good Spring-Break-tequila-and-hot-latin-sex kinda way.

    9. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:06

      Animation!

      Izzat actually a JPG? Never seen such a thang!
      .

    10. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:06

      You know what cracks me up? Teh ads I’m getting on Glennzilla’s page are for Erin Burnett’s CNN show.

    11. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:06

      Screw teh border fence, it’s time to invade Mexico
      yay! *runs to grab swim suit*

      and not in that good Spring-Break-tequila-and-hot-latin-sex kinda way.

      *screeching to a halt*

      wut?

    12. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:11

      Izzat actually a JPG? Never seen such a thang!

      Jeez, I never noticed that. The answer is Sadly, No!

    13. The Goddamn Batman Is Back, And He's Bringing Sexy With Him said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:13

      Libya was just too short to get a proper warboner on, wasn’t it?

    14. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:14

      BATMAN!

    15. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:15

      Iran should be held responsible via an invasion of American hitchhikers.

    16. paleotectonics said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:15

      I mean, I understand Petraeus shoveling this shit around. Killing has been his business for a long time, and business has never been bad. The President and Holder have really never been anything other than Clinton style triangulators, who just refuse to believe that, with the next complete sell-out of the American people, the Republicans will not now love him. (Double negative is deliberate – makes as much sense as Obama trying to get support from Yertle the McTurtle and Eddie Cantor.)

      But FFS, Biden has frequently shown flashes of being human! Yet even he is running around with battle-bongos. Dammit.

    17. Whale Chowder said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:23

      BATMAN!

      Oh sure. It’s teh Prodigal Son all over again. We hang around, provide cogent commentary and lulz and it’s all *yawn* but The Fucking Batman waltzes in and it’s “Where’s that fatted calf!”

      FINE.

    18. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:25

      What, you don’t like fatted calf?

    19. Another Kiwi said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:28

      Whaley’s all pouty, folks. Send Cetacean hugs!
      Isn’t it disgraceful that these ebul Ayrabs wanted to kill a senior political figure inna nother country. The fiends!!!

    20. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:32

      Libya reminds me of teh conflicted emotions on teh right. Sure they lurve their FREEDOM BOMBS, but dangnabit if they’re gonna cheer for Obummer. In this case it’s even worse since teh ultimate target of teh plot was a brown d00d. FREEDOM BOMBS are shockingly awesome but there will be hell to pay if a single US serviceman dies trying to protect teh Saudi ambassador.

    21. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:32

      Mmmmmm fatted calf….

    22. mmy said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:34

      But FFS, Biden has frequently shown flashes of being human! Yet even he is running around with battle-bongos. Dammit.

      I’m torn here. I never want to agree with the Corner about everything, especially when they’re motivated by more PNAC-style empire-building. Having said that, there is a line between things that you do as part of espionage, and acts of war. Trying to kill ambassadors is skating right up to that line.

      In short, the guys who want to go to war with Iran for money and/or power are evil. But it’s also possible for Iran to do something so dumb that the good guys agree with the evil guys. I’m not sure this is it, though, and we should pray that the Iraq folly has taught the importance of unimpeachable evidence.

    23. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:39

      mmy,

      Where does Raymond Davis fall with respect to the line? Also too, teh evidence that Iran is involved is that teh prosecutors say that d00d phoned his cousin who is totally in teh Quds Force. Or might have been at one point.

      Also remember – there were no explosives. No plot actually occured. Just teh feds luring some guy into this ridiculously contrived scenario.

      Remember that teh info we’ve got is based on teh unsealed criminal complaint. Sure teh prosecutors believe Iran is involved. Quelle surprise.

    24. Smut Clyde said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:40

      I mean, I understand Petraeus shoveling this shit around. Killing has been his business for a long time, and business has never been bad.

      In the best Westmoreland tradition, the figures that Petraeus quoted about targetting success were basically made up.

      While I’m reading the Guardian, is this news in the US yet?
      http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/oct/12/wall-street-journal-andrew-langhoff

      WSJ turns out to be boosting “sales” by giving away copies (41% of Europe edition!) but claiming them as actually paid for, through complex money-laundering schemes, involving advertorials (not labelled as advertorials) for companies assisting with the scam.

    25. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:43

      If it were an actual Iranian attempt, through their actual agents, or their cat’s paws, I would be surprised as hell. This incident sounds as plausible as the John McCain presidential campaign being an attempt by the shadowy Panama Canal Zone organization to take over the U.S.

    26. DrDick said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:44

      Come on now! Over a the Cornhole, there is always a reason to bomb Iran. Is it sunny out? Bomb Iran! Is it raining? Bomb Iran! A white conservative Christian terrorist blew up a Martin Luther King Day parade? Bomb Iran!

    27. DrDick said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:45

      sounds as plausible as the John McCain presidential campaign being an attempt by the shadowy Panama Canal Zone organization to take over the U.S.

      Damn! He’s on to us.

    28. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:46

      WSJ turns out to be boosting “sales” by giving away copies (41% of Europe edition!) but claiming them as actually paid for, through complex money-laundering schemes, involving advertorials (not labelled as advertorials) for companies assisting with the scam.

      By Grabthar’s Hammer! that’s the most dishonest thing Rupert Murdoch has done since breakfast!

    29. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:46

      it’s “Where’s that fatted calf!”

      I prefer “milky thighs” myself.

    30. mmy said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:48

      Also remember – there were no explosives. No plot actually occured. Just teh feds luring some guy into this ridiculously contrived scenario.

      Well, that’s kind of my point. A guys makes a suspicous trip to Iran, and then arranges some details with a DEA informant? Seems loose.

      Like I said, more and better evidence needs to be public before I would buy this. Hillary’s “Nobody could make that up, right?” is not sufficient, especially after all of the BS that was contrived to get us into Iraq.

      All I’m saying is – and it makes me feel dirty to type this next part – there are things Iran could do that would make me agree with the Corner on this. Actually killing ambassadors would be one of them. Plotting to kill them? Probably not, but it’s closer.

    31. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:48

      WSJ turns out to be boosting “sales” by giving away copies

      Oh right! England gets the kewl Murdoch phone hacking scandal, we get the crappy “Hey! Let’s boost sales by calling free giveaways actual sales!” scam…

    32. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:50

      BTW, TinTin, I’ve always thought this was a better Kirsanow trope

    33. sjelly said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:51

      How ghastly and unprincipled. Extra-judicial killing on the soil of foreigners. I am appall-ed. Why, it sounds like something Israel would do/has done. Or like something the USA would do/has done/is doing. Wait, have I got those country names right? That can’t be since they’re shining examples of democracy, righteousness, and like that. Obviously, I am mistaken.

    34. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:51

      Indeed, we can tie the trope to the topic.

      A sort of “tropic” if you will…

    35. Steerpike said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:53

      Ya know, on the subject of fishy-sounding rationales, did it seem strange to anyone else that 2 American civilians just “happened” to be on a nature hike in the region of the Iraq/Iran border, and just accidentally wandered a little too close and found themselves in Iran? I mean what? Were they going for a Boy Scout Merit Badge in “international Incident Triggering”? Were they just looking for fossils? Pirate Treasure? Hawt Camel Sex? Who does this?

    36. paleotectonics said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:56

      @Smut,

      I do not, really cannot, believe the whole schmeal isreal. At first glance this appears to be a Lackawanna 6 rerun, complete with Secret Agent Yusef Gamal asking,”So, do any one of you know anyone from Qods?”

      Ahmadinejad has never struck me as suicidal. A successful assassination like this would end him, and sooner than later. (

      Unless we get another Bush in the WH, in which case he’d get a decade of comfy retirement in Pakistan.)

    37. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 12, 2011 at 21:59

      It just seems so bananas that I’m not gonna believe it unless forced to. Maybe via waterboarding.

    38. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:00

      Okay. Got your point. I agree that plotting assassinations of public figures is one of those things that we should condemn. And context matters too, so teh assassination of bin Laden I suppose is okay because he’s ebul – but teh Saudi ambassador isn’t. Although how Al-Awlaki figures into the continuum of ebul is a bit moar complicated. And those two motorcycle guys that Raymond Davis shot – but they were petty thieves and credit card fraudsters so that’s okay. Teh hundreds of people he targetted for unmanned drone strikes too.

      Intelligence forces do fucked up shit. All. Teh. Frigging. Time. Outsourcing bombings to a criminal drug gang? Sure why not. Certainly no less fucked up than trying to send Fidel a box of exploding cigars.

      And still, teh “plot” makes no sense at all. Tell me, who do you think has a better chance at successfully planting a bomb in a Washington restaurant – a used car salesman with American citizenship but who is really a sekrit Quds Force operative or some guy who is part of an infamous Mexican drug cartel?

      It’s a fake plot. Even if it weren’t a fake plot, it is not so out of teh ordinary compared to stuff that intelligence operatives do all teh frigging time, let alone compared to shit they ineptly try to plot.

    39. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:01

      Ya know, on the subject of fishy-sounding rationales, did it seem strange to anyone else that 2 American civilians just “happened” to be on a nature hike in the region of the Iraq/Iran border

      3 Americans.

      I doubt it. Bauer writes for Mother Jones, The Nation and was a correspondent for Pacifica. Not exactly the kind of guy who would cooperate with the administration.

    40. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:02

      Of all the predictable, stupid, useless cheap shots in political rhetoric, none is more familiar than:

      “Oooooh, sanctions! That’ll teach ‘em. And maybe a really strong reprimand afterward.” Etc.

      Hey, fuckhead, if you think war is so great, I’ll help you find the nearest military recruiter.

    41. wiley said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:04

      Is a military option to prevent Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon off the table?

      Anyone have any idea what military play prevents a country from obtaining a nuclear weapon—shy of bombing every square inch of said country?

    42. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:04

      Outsourcing bombings to a criminal drug gang?

      For $1.5 million?

      Not a chance in hell.

    43. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:06

      I prefer “milky thighs” myself.

      hmmm…t & u is not a fan of a nicely turned cankle…

    44. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:06

      Yeah. $1.5 million. LOL.

    45. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:12

      t & u is not a fan of a nicely turned broken cankle…

      FTFY

    46. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:16

      I’m especially tickled by Kirsanow’s question regarding teh Iranian Green Movement of 2009. Not just because Iran’s alleged meddling is some sort of magical backwards justification of meddling in internal Iranian politics but because of teh implied better relations between Saudi and an Iran led by a populist democratic movement. LOL.

    47. Cerberus said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:18

      Libya was just too short to get a proper warboner on, wasn’t it?

      It’s just not the same if it’s not your idea. Imagine you are a complete douchebag and your wife/lover/rent-boy wants to do something for them, to get them in the mood for the triple dildo wet suit that is the daily standard. Things like pillow talk or a light massage and pussy ass shit like that. Well, that just doesn’t get one quite as hard as planning the right combination butt-plug/swing-harness of war-hard-on-fun and knowing that you are the only special people who want it.

      So, yeah, a black democrat recommended that war and they hadn’t had enough time to build their hate boner so they feel like they are owed Iran because they couldn’t quite spurt their load to their satisfaction on Libya. Not to mention they liked the person in charge of Libya, he was a good stooge, whereas they’ve still got a hate boner for how their puppet in Iran was disposed of.

    48. smedley said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:19

      “I prefer “milky thighs” myself.”

      THAT’S NOT MILK!!!!111

    49. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:21

      Further, teh “plot” makes so little sense for Iran’s perspective that there’s speculation that it was teh work of an independent possibly rogue faction in teh Quds Force. And we all know that post-populist overthrow of despotic governments with a deeply entrenched military structure, teh military never acts up or seizes control in teh power vacuum or anything liek that. Lookit Egypt!

      FFS, that question about teh Persian Awakening is even moar ludicrous than teh alleged plot.

    50. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:21

      THAT’S NOT MILK!!!!111

      *shrug*

      I wondered why it was so salty…

    51. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:22

      Ya know, on the subject of fishy-sounding rationales, did it seem strange to anyone else that 2 American civilians just “happened” to be on a nature hike in the region of the Iraq/Iran border, and just accidentally wandered a little too close and found themselves in Iran? I mean what? Were they going for a Boy Scout Merit Badge in “international Incident Triggering”? Were they just looking for fossils? Pirate Treasure? Hawt Camel Sex? Who does this?

      one of my tool friends wrote something on fb about these guys…he was all like…how do you not know you’re in iran?

    52. Thread Bear said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:23

      WSJ turns out to be boosting “sales” by giving away copies (41% of Europe edition!) but claiming them as actually paid for, through complex money-laundering schemes, involving advertorials (not labelled as advertorials) for companies assisting with the scam.

      You know, if people really want to deport dangerous aliens then Rupert Murdoch should be at the top of the list. Yeah, he’s only one person but as far as the money earned he’s probably taking more than all the illegal migrant workers combined. And it’s not like we couldn’t find plenty of Americans willing and able to do the job. I mean, “Evil Greedy Bastard” is not really something that we have a drastic shortage of.

    53. tigris said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:25

      how do you not know you’re in iran?

      Yeah, cuz every country is a different color and there’s that big black line!

    54. Steerpike said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:28

      The only way you’re going to defeat Iran is bombing, and I do mean nuke. Look at the map: Iran is bigger in both size and population than Iraq and Aghanistan combined. Iran is not some third-world shithole with a crippled army that’s gonna fold like a cheap lawnchair as soon as it sees American tanks, either. Furthermore, International sanctions notwithstanding, Iran is not withour friends. I don’t think China or Russia are going to smile too generously on us trying to occupy their biggest oil-suppliers. The Ayatollahs and Ahmedinejad are not particularly popular, it’s true, but that doesn’t mean the population is going to be throwing candy and flowers at the feet of American GIs.

    55. Pupienus said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:30

      the John McCain presidential campaign being an attempt by the shadowy Panama Canal Zone organization to take over the U.S.

      Seems legit.

      how do you not know you’re in iran?

      Really, they had to walk right over the line marking the border, right? Judging by google earth, it must be at least two miles wide!

    56. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:30

      Yeah, cuz every country is a different color and there’s that big black line!

      i know! i can’t believe they didn’t trip over the big black line…i mean in this day and age, country delineation has to be 3d, doesn’t it?

    57. Pupienus said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:31

      Grrrr tigris.

    58. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:32

      how do you not know you’re in iran?

      To be fair to teh not-hikers, I’d say that teh repeated warnings from teh guy running teh hostel you stayed at is a good clue. Teh border guards telling you to stay away is also a bit of a good sign that you might be near teh border.

    59. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:32

      And it’s not like we couldn’t find plenty of Americans willing and able to do the job.

      we could offer him to the ows protestors…

    60. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:33

      teh implied better relations between Saudi and an Iran led by a populist democratic movement.

      I thought the Arab Spring was an Islamofascist plot to get rid of friendly tyrants and wipe out Israel.

      Or are you saying Glenn Beck was wrong about something?

    61. Pupienus said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:33

      I *thought* i had just refreshed this tab.

    62. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:34

      Refreshing teh tab.

    63. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:35

      To be fair to teh not-hikers, I’d say that teh repeated warnings from teh guy running teh hostel you stayed at is a good clue. Teh border guards telling you to stay away is also a bit of a good sign that you might be near teh border.

      i am a pretty limited stay on the trail kind of hiker meself, only because i have absolutely no sense of direction and could quite easily find myself somewhere i wouldn’t want to be…which is why i generally eschew hiking…

    64. tigris said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:36

      Grrrr tigris.

      HOTCHA!

    65. Thread Bear said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:36

      My little guidebook here, Hiking in the Middle East for Fun and Profit, tells me that if you suddenly step in yellow cake then you have crossed the Iranian border and should immediately turn back.

    66. Mark D said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:36

      Yeah, cuz every country is a different color and there’s that big black line!

      That gave me da gigglez.

      Meanwhile, an actual on-topic thought: Anyone else think this all seems like another excuse to turn two small clusterfucks of wars into one big really big ‘ol clusterfuck?

      After all, those big black lines are only theoretical, especially if some nation has the military might to move them …

    67. Mark D said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:37

      That’s one big really big ‘ol typo.

      And to think someone pays me to write stuff.

      Ironic, that.

    68. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:37

      I thought the Arab Spring was an Islamofascist plot to get rid of friendly tyrants and wipe out Israel.

      Silly man. Arab Spring is a deodorizing soap that leaves you feeling like a genie in a bottle!

    69. Stag Party Palin said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:39

      Peter Kirsanow. People with mustaches are always suspect, and he stole his from Harcourt Fenton Mudd. Makes him look like a Black Russian, or the doorman at the Binkley Arms. If he stood up at my news conference I would be laughing too hard to answer him.

    70. Pupienus said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:39

      Operation Northwoods, anyone?

    71. Chris said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:39

      Further, teh “plot” makes so little sense for Iran’s perspective that there’s speculation that it was teh work of an independent possibly rogue faction in teh Quds Force.

      The Quds Force is part of the broader Revolutionary Guard Corps (the Pasdaran), and it’s an open question exactly how much these guys as a whole are still under control. Over the last three decades they’ve grown from a small elite group of bodyguards to a full blown state-within-a-state, and Khamenei’s had to lean on them more heavily than ever over the last couple of years as the regime’s main political army suppressing dissent and whatnot.

      Because of that, observers think the tail may be starting to wag the dog.

    72. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:40

      Um, you guys are forgetting that the hikers claim they were on Iraqi soil when they were captured.

      Who’s to say that the Iranian troops weren’t on an incursion into Iraqi territory and decided to take them hostage to keep them from talking?

    73. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:41

      Anyone else think this all seems like another excuse to turn two small clusterfucks of wars into one big really big ‘ol clusterfuck?

      I did, sort of

    74. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:42

      That’s one big really big ‘ol typo

      i thought you were just being vehement…

    75. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:44

      Silly man. Arab Spring is a deodorizing soap that leaves you feeling like a genie in a bottle!

      you silly man! everbody knows that swarthy brown people don’t bathe and they smell funneh…gosh!

    76. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:46

      Yeah, cuz every country is a different color and there’s that big black line!

      It is very easy to jam GPS receivers, and even for the U.S. government, to turn off the GPS signal or degrade its accuracy in a given part of the world. So if they were dependent on GPS to keep them on the right side of the line, perhaps they were screwed. In the past, Iran has not been shy about going outside of their borders to grab something they thought was shiny. In the shooting part of the 2nd gulf war, they did grab a UK patrol boat and kept their crew hostage for a number of weeks or months. Lastly, it is possible the giant black line was dotted, rather than solid, leading the hikers to believe they were crossing a state or territory line and not a national boundary. Of course, the hikers could have been on the wrong side of the border deliberately, accidentally but that would have been idiotic.

    77. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:47

      Silly man. Arab Spring is a deodorizing soap that leaves you feeling like a genie in a bottle!

      you silly man! everbody knows that swarthy brown people don’t bathe and they smell funneh…gosh!

      The joke’s on them: it’s made of camel dung!

    78. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:48

      Of course, the hikers could have been on the wrong side of the border deliberately, accidentally but that would have been idiotic.

      it could be a farside cartoon…

      c’mon ya big chicken…i dare ya!

    79. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:49

      The joke’s on them: it’s made of camel dung!

      it’s better to have camel dung than camel toe…

    80. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:53

      it’s better to have camel dung than camel toe…

      BITE YOUR TONGUE!

    81. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:54

      BITE YOUR TONGUE!

      heh…i knew that would get you…

    82. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:56

      a couple of years ago a drunk chick asked hubbkf if he wanted to see her camel toe

    83. jim said,

      October 12, 2011 at 22:59

      Meet the new con, same as the old con.

      Just in time to knock OWS off the front page, it’s ……… MOTORBOATS OF DOOM 2: MEXICAN BOOGALOO!

      This is NOT how you whack somebody when the potential ramifications of exposure include your country getting a case of Carpet-Bombing Flu. Much better to use a zealous (& ideally suicidal) nutjob (preferably a US citizen) who’s incoherent as hell even on a good day, just in case he chumps the job. Best to just hire a professional hitman from Stateside organized crime (same cost with a 100% chance of success & near-zero odds of geting busted) – who will probably do the job with one bullet & no innocent bystanders as victims.

      From what I’ve read so far, almost nobody bright enough to wipe themselves is buying this weak shit*. Even the G-Men themselves are backtracking on the money-shot of high-up Iranian knowledge or planning, after one whole DAY … & Clinton’s “nobody could make that up” is just Rice’s “surely noone could have anticipated” in a little black dress & pearls.

      Pretty telling that the bombing was to go down in a swank DC restaurant where there might very well be actual Congresscreatures as collateral damage!!!! Plausibility FAIL but niche-marketing WIN in a town where bulletproof glass & Kevlar vests are regular accessories for politicians.
      _____________________________
      * Yet NRO, who insist on an independant spectrographic analysis if Obama says the sky is blue, are lapping it up without blinking?

      RUN FAINTINGCOUCH.EXE

    84. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:01

      kirsanow reminds me of this

    85. Mark D said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:09

      i thought you were just being vehement…

      Had I included a comma, then yes. But sadly, no!

      It does, however, explain why my boss has three people edit my work (writers =/= good editors).

      This comment is a good excuse to note, for the umpteenth time, that Chris has taught me more in the comment sections of Sadlyville than ANYTHING I have ever learned through the not-so-regular* news.

      So thanks. Sincerely, honestly, and truthfully: THANK. YOU.

      (* Read: They’re full of shit.)

    86. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:17

      How amusing.

      Outrage: the (likely invented) notion that that evil country Iran is attacking our good friend of democracy Exxon, Saudi Arabia!!

      I’m reminded of the time our good friend, Iraq was attacked Iran, and we had to support our buddy Saddam through thick and thin, and even poison gas.

      I wonder how much better off everyone would be if we didn’t overthrow Iran’s democracy in the first place?

      USA! USA! USA!
      ~

    87. bbkf said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:19

      ot: joe soucheray giving back-handed compliments to rahm emanuel because he’s cleaning up some of the chicago city employees’ ‘corruption.’ is also going on about how ‘unfair’ it is that some retired city employees are being paid six figure pensions…first off, he foghorns and mocks ANYone who uses the word ‘unfair.’ secondly, he finds ows to be a big crock of shit and that the protestors are stupid, lazy, spoiled brats. thirdly, he is all CAPITALISM ROCKS!!! YAY BILLIONAIRES AND CORPORATIONS!!!

      he’s claiming that these employee pensions are unfair and corrupt, because the tax payers are paying for it…sigh…he is windmilling himself, to use a phrase of his…

    88. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:19

      I wonder how much better off everyone would be if we didn’t overthrow Iran’s democracy in the first place?

      Lots?

    89. wiley said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:30

      ZOMG. Fox news resurrected Reagan for a reach-around again, this time about what the president should should do about Iran, but is too wussy to do.

      Well, the answer is, Gretchen, unfortunately, they’re going to get a lot of this (shaking fist). You know, our secretary of state and our president are very good at shaking this fist and telling them that this just will not stand. Well, unfortunately, you know, our enemies understand that. Every Third World despot, every Third World country around the world understands that there will be no repercussions. What should happen? If President Reagan was in there, I assure you, I am confident in telling you, it would be a message on a very, very large scale, and it would not be one or two rockets into an aspirin factory.

      (It would involve a cake?)
      Too bad being oblivious to one’s own irony isn’t fatal.

    90. actor212 said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:32

      What should happen? If President Reagan was in there, I assure you, I am confident in telling you, it would be a message on a very, very large scale, and it would not be one or two rockets into an aspirin factory.

      Unless of course the weapons Reagan sold them ended up being delivered there by UPS….

    91. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:36

      I wonder how much better off everyone would be if we didn’t overthrow Iran’s democracy in the first place?

      As Henry Kissinger said, why should we let a country go socialist due to the stupidity of its own people?

    92. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:36

      Or the message was a Marine barracks in Lebanon.

      But we kicked butt on Grenada!
      ~

    93. Chris said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:45

      This comment is a good excuse to note, for the umpteenth time, that Chris has taught me more in the comment sections of Sadlyville than ANYTHING I have ever learned through the not-so-regular* news.

      So thanks. Sincerely, honestly, and truthfully: THANK. YOU.

      Compliment very much appreciated, sir.

      (Although, in fairness, being better than the not-so-regular news is kind of like being the world’s tallest midget. Not fishing for more compliments, I promise, I take the original one with much gratitude. I’m just saying… “Full of shit” puts it well and succinctly).

    94. tsam said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:51

      Is Obummer REALLY pulling the choo choo train = mobile weapons lab scam? I sure hope not.

    95. Chris said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:56

      Well, unfortunately, you know, our enemies understand that. Every Third World despot, every Third World country around the world understands that there will be no repercussions.

      Presumably, they understand this because Osama Bin Laden and Muammar Qaddafi are still living it up, Obama having repeatedly failed to take the opportunities fate gave him to bring those guys down. Because he’s a pussy.

      Oh.

      Fuck.

      Well, the answer is, Gretchen, unfortunately, they’re going to get a lot of this (shaking fist). You know, our secretary of state and our president are very good at shaking this fist and telling them that this just will not stand. [...] What should happen? If President Reagan was in there, I assure you, I am confident in telling you, it would be a message on a very, very large scale, and it would not be one or two rockets into an aspirin factory.

      An EXACT reversal of the way history actually happened. Reagan was the dude who was great at shaking fists and making “this just will not stand!” kind of statements like that “Tear down this wall!” moment in Berlin, giving American conservatives obelisk-sized boners that ensured his reelection.

      The problem is, what he actually did about Iran when he came up against them wasn’t nearly that impressive. There was that embassy bombing, and that Marine barracks bombing, and Reagan reacted forcefully to them by… leaving. Huh! Then there was the thing where Iranians and their allies were snatching American citizens (including a CIA station chief) off the streets in the Middle East. Reagan again reacted with the kind of forceful leadership you can only learn in the First Motion Picture Unit (actual name of his WW2 unit), and tried to buy the hostage-takers off with nice shipments of weapons, thus letting them now that any time they wanted goodies from America, they could just dangle a few hostages over our head.

      If we assume the conservative reaction of kicking asses and taking names to be the correct answer, Zombie Reagan would be the worst person to entrust with such a duty. Bring back Zombie LeMay, Zombie MacArthur and Zombie Sherman, for crying out loud, the people who were actual crazy-ass ass-kickers, rather than posers like Ronnie.

    96. tsam said,

      October 12, 2011 at 23:59

      and tried to buy the hostage-takers off with nice shipments of weapons, thus letting them now that any time they wanted goodies from America, they could just dangle a few hostages over our head.

      While talking a bigass game about NOT NEGOTIATING WITH TERRORISTS!

      And, let’s let those zombies rest in pieces.

    97. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:05

      and tried to buy the hostage-takers off with nice shipments of weapons, thus letting them now that any time they wanted goodies from America, they could just dangle a few hostages over our head.

      While talking a bigass game about NOT NEGOTIATING WITH TERRORISTS!

      c’mon! he didn’t remember any of that!!! jeez…pics or it didn’t happen…wait, wut?

    98. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:08

      Two girls, one cup Norwegian version.

    99. Spaghetti Lee said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:08

      Whatever happened to not getting involved in a land war in Asia? Seriously.

      I don’t know. Maybe Iraq/Afghanistan have just completely soured my concept of a “good war”. With all the poisonous little spiders scurrying around in the war industry, just waiting to sink their fangs into something, I don’t know if there can be such a thing in practice, even if there is in theory.

      There’s also the fact that we don’t. Have. The fucking money. Good God, NatRev’s been going on and on about how we need to destroy unions and sell Social Security to Wall Street in order to save us from The Debt, but of course they’ll start rattling sabres for a third fucking Middle Eastern land war, holy shit, because there’s always, ALWATS money for war. OK, maybe ignoring Iran is something of a security threat to this country. That’s not my department. But even if it is, letting our infrastructure crumble and our cities and industrial neighborhoods rot and our schools go to shit is also a fucking security risk, you neocon rat turd.

    100. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:09

      okay…i don’t get the whole x people, one cup…

    101. Spaghetti Lee said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:09

      okay…i don’t get the whole x people, one cup…

      You’re a lucky man.

    102. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:10

      You’re a lucky man.

      i’m a girl…and you are not helping…

    103. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:15

      I’ve never watched that video either, bbkf. I know enough from the hints that I don’t want to.
      ~

    104. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:18

      One day there will be a GIF waiting. And you will want to look away. You will not succeed.

    105. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:20

      I’ve never watched that video either, bbkf. I know enough from the hints that I don’t want to.

      hmmmm…thanks…i no wanna see either, then…

    106. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:33

      Without watching the video, this tattoo at the tattoo site you posted earlier, will give you just enough idea to be glad you’ve never seen the video.

    107. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:35

      LOL–just watch the video, bbkf. It’s not that bad. Mostly hype.

    108. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:35

      I wonder, why I like, commas so, much.

    109. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:36

      It’s not that bad. Mostly hype.

      tsam is evil.

    110. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:37

      Of course they always want to have it both ways.

      Iran is a big bad scary existential threat – but we can take them out with a few well placed smart bombs.

      They’re somehow a grave threat and a pushover at the same time.

      Sound familiar?

    111. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:37

      Is an Iranian Drug Cartel Behind the Assassination Plot against the Saudi Ambassador?
      http://www.juancole.com

    112. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:39

      tsam is evil.

      tsam want’s to impose tsaria law in the U.S.

    113. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:43

      I’m kidding–FFS, DO NOT WATCH IT.

    114. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:50

      http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/10/did_iranian_regime_really_approve_plot_to_have_mexican_drug_cartel_member_kill_saudi_arabian_ambassador.php?ref=fpblg
      incudes pdf of prosecutors complaint

    115. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 0:56

      Of course they always want to have it both ways.

      Iran is a big bad scary existential threat – but we can take them out with a few well placed smart bombs.

      They’re somehow a grave threat and a pushover at the same time.

      Sound familiar?

      Those boys will be home by Christmas.

      No, this doesn’t sound familiar at all.

    116. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:00

      okay…i don’t get the whole x people, one cup…

      Actually, if you’d like the experience of it without actually watching it, Youtube is loaded with reactions from various people to seeing it. Many of them are HILARIOUS. You will be able to tell just how horribly depraved and scary the video is from these reactions.

    117. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:09

      …letting our infrastructure crumble and our cities and industrial neighborhoods rot and our schools go to shit is also a fucking security risk, you neocon rat turd.

      No shit. It should go without saying. Really. A colonial superpower as banana republic is out of whack—just one of many pick one, you stupid motherfucker, obvious situations that neocon rat turds can’t think their way out of.

      Ditto—unhealthy, overworked or unemployed citizens with no access to affordable health care.

    118. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:13

      …letting our infrastructure crumble and our cities and industrial neighborhoods rot and our schools go to shit is also a fucking security risk, you neocon rat turd.

      Mr. Galt builds his own roads. Mr. Galt don’t need no education. Mr. Galt sez government is no good. Mr. Galt don’t like him some flouride in his water. Mr. Galt don’t like water in his whiskey. Mr. Galt got a rattlesnake for a necktie. Mr. Galt ain’t nuthin but a hound dog. Mr. Galt wear no shoeshine. Mr. Galt is one smooth criminal. Bet on it, suckah.

    119. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:13

      A colonial superpower as banana republic

      Sounds like the Soviet Union.

      (Too soon?)

    120. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:14

      Ditto—unhealthy, overworked or unemployed citizens with no access to affordable health care.

      PRECISELY why we need to cut taxes right now.

    121. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:24

      Sounds like the Soviet Union.

      (Too soon?)

      It sure is a good thing we aren’t being sucked dry in Afghanistan like they were, huh?

    122. Arky said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:26

      Know what would be kinda funny? If the WH released a fake leak saying the President wants to invade Iran, kill all the brown people and take all their oil and zooooom, KABLOOIE! Ak-ak-ak-ak! … But he’d have to re-institute the draft to do so.

      I bet a bunch of neo-tards would yank their schlongs off mid-wank.

    123. John Revolta said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:28

      They’re somehow a grave threat and a pushover at the same time.

      They’ll welcome us as Libya raiders!!

    124. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:29

      EMBARRASSING.

    125. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:35

      There’s also the fact that we don’t. Have. The fucking money.

      Neocon rat turd plan to reduce the costs of wars in the Mid-East so we can have more wars (without incovenient arguments about the costs):

      Pay civilian contractors to do more of the jobs that soldiers used to do, and encourage the contractors to hire from the prison population. That way, nobody would have to pay government workers their exhorbitant salaries and more real* jobs would be created. I can’t think of a better way to have a first rate military than to pay profiteers 20 to 30 times more than soldiers while military families are eligible for food stamps.

    126. acrannymint said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:42

      I felt I had to post something. No idea whether it will make it through filters/moderation that may be in place. Assholes like this only see in the abstract, they have no idea of the reality or the long term effects. http://www.english.illinois.edu/maps/poets/g_l/levine/bombing.htm – sorry too lazy to do the html thing

    127. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:43

      Mr. Galt don’t like him some flouride in his water.

      OUR PRECIOUS BODILY FLUIDS!

    128. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:44

      Like Ghostbusters 2, but with trains?

    129. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:44

      It sure is a good thing we aren’t being sucked dry in Afghanistan like they were, huh?

      VBJR?

    130. acrannymint said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:47

      I meant I had to post on America’s Shittiest Website™ in response to the drivel

    131. Anonymous said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:48

      Off topic: HAHAHAAHAdumbshit.

    132. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:49

      Koch was appointed president of the Institute for Humane Studies.

      GUH? Humane–I don’t this means what you think it does.

      (From Jim’s earlier link)

    133. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:49

      acrannymint

      The Hiroshima bomb was something like 18 kilotons. Today that would be considered a “tactical” nuke.

      Sometimes I try to wrap my mind around the fact that I used to sit alert with 16 of those things on my bomber – except they were each about 50 times as powerful as the Hiroshima bomb.

      Fortunately I don’t try to do that very often.

    134. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:50

      EPIC MUGSHOT. That belongs one tier below Nick Nolte’s.

    135. acrannymint said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:50

      @anonymous – because booze and weapons is always a good idea

    136. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:52

      Re: Atlas Slugged Part Deux:

      And the hope is that it will be bigger and better.

      First, it’ll be longer.

    137. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:54

      OUR PRECIOUS BODILY FLUIDS!

      Save your cheese for gold teef!

    138. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:55

      Like Ghostbusters 2, but with trains?

      Some people will watch *anything* with Bill Murray in it.

    139. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:55

      That Nation article jim linked to rocks completely. They’ve filed a Freedom of Information request to see if Hayek drew Social Security while living in the states and working for a libertarian think tank. ‘Tis ever so cool.

      Calling this mere hypocrisy downplays the seriousness of their fraud. Koch and Hayek are no more hypocritical than the used-car salesman who knowingly sells a lemon to a gullible buyer, or the financial agency that rates “AAA” instruments it knows are crap. This is a grand swindle played on a trusting, gullible public, a scam whose goal is to con America’s dying middle class into handing over their retirement money to the richest 0.1 percent, convincing them that in doing so, they’re “empowering” themselves and protecting their “individual liberty.”

    140. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:57

      LOL–just watch the video, bbkf. It’s not that bad. Mostly hype.

      not gonna…

    141. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 13, 2011 at 1:58

      Really, I think our reality may have collapse some time around 2005 and is now just a parody of itself.

    142. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:01

      That Iranian car dealer who allegedly hired a Mexican Cartel assassin, a.k.a. DEA Agent (aren’t they some lucky blokes?) to kill a Saudi diplomat—Is it wrong to picture him in a white suit, coked up, at a discotheque with a sausage in his pants? I was alive at that time—just coming of age—there really were a lot of Iranians in discotheques, and our Air Force, was training their pilots.

    143. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:01

      NINER NINER NINER–GUESS WHO TOOK THE LEAD

    144. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:01

      and i used too many commas. sue me.

    145. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:04

      CUT THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S TAXES NOW!

    146. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:22

      Sometimes I try to wrap my mind around the fact that I used to sit alert with 16 of those things on my bomber – except they were each about 50 times as powerful as the Hiroshima bomb.

      I was in Missile Warning (NORAD) and sat alert with coffee and cigarettes so I could help to make the nuclear holocaust more efficient in case of war. At the time, we were told that the number of warheads on a long range Soviet missile was classified, but their were probably ten to twelve 40 megaton bombs, per. It is actually possible to overstate a nuclear threat.

      Thanks for the traumatic memories Team B.

      This is just one reason I hated, hated, hated, hated the Bush Administration and hate it still and always.

    147. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:22

      you sir, are a comma-ie!

    148. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:24

      CUT THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S TAXES NOW!

      i really don’t see how he can live on that kind of take home pay…oh, that’s right, i forgot…he’s just an everyday joe in everyday life…he goes to the dq in omaha, just like us!

    149. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:25

      well, except that he owns the dq and i don’t go to the one in omaha…

    150. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:29

      i really don’t see how he can live on that kind of take home pay

      Well dude needs to create some more jobs like yesterday.

    151. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:35

      That’s “mam” to you, buddy!

      Comma, comma, comma, comma-chameleon. It comes and goes, it comes and goes-oh-oh-oh-ohs. I don’t what “it” is but it is something that really shows. It really shows. It really show-oh-oh-ohs…

    152. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:36

      part of a Headline seen at Great orange Satan:

      …Gingrich tops Perry.

      Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew.

      ..but really, who is surprised that Perry is a bottom?

    153. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:36

      heh…i got called a d00d earlier here…my apologies…and nice boy george imitation…

    154. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:37

      …Gingrich tops Perry.

      and i bet they have both topped santorum…

    155. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:41

      NINER NINER NINER–GUESS WHO TOOK THE LEAD

      I’d like to think it was Perry’s incoherence that made him drop in the polls. But I’d be kidding myself. It was his support of in-state tuition for undocumented alien kids.

    156. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:47

      Prince Fielder looks like a giant teddy bear in pajamas swinging a Slim Jim. That is one huge dude.

    157. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:47

      It was his support of in-state tuition for undocumented alien kids.

      Silly Perry. Education’s for whites!

    158. Crissa said,

      October 13, 2011 at 2:52

      What would attacking Iran do to stop intelligence agents from making up stupid plans?

    159. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:06

      They would be scared to make stupid plans, and would have to start making making smart ones, instead, silly.

      It was a DEA “informant” not an agent. My bad.

      I won’t call you “buddy” anymore, bbk, although I do call my boyfriend “kelly” but only because it’s his name. Never met a girl named Buddy, though.

    160. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:09

      It sure is a good thing we aren’t being sucked dry in Afghanistan like they were, huh?

      I can’t remember if I got this link from here: I don’t think so, but could be wrong, anyway, here it is: Closing the “Collapse Gap:” the USSR was better prepared for collapse than the U.S.

      The sentence that more or less summarizes the entire slideshow:

      [...] many of the problems that sunk the Soviet Union are now endangering the United States as well. Such as a huge, well-equipped, very expensive military, with no clear mission, bogged down in fighting Muslim insurgents. Such as energy shortfalls linked to peaking oil production. Such as a persistently unfavorable trade balance, resulting in runaway foreign debt. Add to that a delusional self-image, an inflexible ideology, and an unresponsive political system.

    161. kg said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:10

      Funny cuz I just heard about some grandma named Buddy today.

    162. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:16

      Dang. All I gotta do is say something then suddenly it ain’t true.

      LGM has a post up about Eric Erikson holding up a sign to show how hard his life is, yet he doesn’t blame Wall Street (like those protesting welfare cheats he’s supporting with the taxes he pays (and they don’t)).

      Dog, strike them dead. Pleeeze?

    163. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:19

      It was a DEA “informant” not an agent. My bad.

      An informant who started working for the DEA in exchange for the charges against him being dropped. It’s always important to have reliable sources before starting a war.

    164. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:26

      I won’t call you “buddy” anymore, bbk, although I do call my boyfriend “kelly” but only because it’s his name. Never met a girl named Buddy, though.

      you can call me buddy…spaghetti lee called me a d00d though…and now that i think of it, what kind of spaghetti IS lee?

    165. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:26

      It’s always important to have reliable sources before starting a war.

      Yeah—like Curveball and Chalabi. I think that’s called “honor among thieves” or something like that.

    166. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:27

      The sentence that more or less summarizes the entire slideshow:

      holy. crap. we. are. screwed.

    167. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:28

      My boyfriend, Kelly (I’ll have you know it’s a man’s name and is Celt for “warrior”) hates to be called “dude”.

    168. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:30

      Bitter expatriate mobsters make the bestest sources for war intel EVAR.

    169. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:31

      The sentence that more or less summarizes the entire slideshow:

      It’s worse than that. They weren’t full of end-timer fundamentalist types.

    170. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:32

      My boyfriend, Kelly (I’ll have you know it’s a man’s name and is Celt for “warrior”) hates to be called “dude”.

      LOL

      Hating to be called ‘dude’ calls your qualifying statement into question.

    171. El Manquecito said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:44

      I’m thumb typing at a remote location so I’ll be brief.
      Informant/zeta/qud plot: bunk
      jim: correct as usual

      Peak wingnut? We’re not even close.

    172. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:49

      It’s worse than that. They weren’t full of end-timer fundamentalist types.

      Oh, he brings that up too, towards the end:

      I have left out two important superpower asymmetries, because they don’t have anything to do with collapse-preparedness. Some countries are simply luckier than others. But I will mention them, for the sake of completeness.

      In terms of racial and ethnic composition, the United States resembles Yugoslavia more than it resembles Russia, so we shouldn’t expect it to be as peaceful as Russia was, following the collapse. Ethnically mixed societies are fragile and have a tendency to explode.

      In terms of religion, the Soviet Union was relatively free of apocalyptic doomsday cults. Very few people there wished for a planet-sized atomic fireball to herald the second coming of their savior. This was indeed a blessing.

      No shit.

    173. El Manquecito said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:51

      And, also, too, I’ve done three fancy meals in the last three nights but I’m damned if I’ll thumb type them. Fresh black trumpets in a light tomato sauce and a leek gratin were the highlights.

    174. Anonymous said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:52

      EPIC MUGSHOT.

      Ain’t it just?

    175. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:53

      Off topic: HAHAHAAHAdumbshit.

      AHEM, he ahemmed.
      ~

    176. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:56

      AHEM, he ahemmed.

      there were a few ahem worthy item this evening, but i’ve abandoned my tuff girl act, so imma let ‘em go…

      also, i am now going to be watching american horror story (which rilly ain’t o.t. if ya think about it) so i’ll talk to you cats tomorrow…

    177. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:57

      tsam, His qualifying statement, not mine. Never really understood why he hates it. Every once and a while I give him such a bong-smokin’ over-the-top duuuuuuuuuuu-ude that he has to laugh, though.

      el maquecito, I think peak wingnut is the denial that comes after a nuclear war fails to bring Jesus back, or does bring Jesus back but he gets the death penalty and we have do the whole damned thing over again, because the message that the fundies got was that Crucifixion is holy. Personally, since I was a little kid, what I got out of it was that we shouldn’t crucify people—Hey! That was the son of God you crucified there. Stop doing that!.

    178. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 3:59

      That was the son of God you crucified there.

      socks?!?! you know i’m getting crucified for your sins, don’t you?*

      *gaffigan paraffrase

    179. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:08

      Fresh black trumpets in a light tomato sauce

      I’d add some tubers, but they go straight to your bottom.

    180. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:09

      Chris, I read that excerpt and knew it was Orlov before I even clicked the link. He knows what he is talking about and unfortunately very few of the American public want to face the realities of peak oil. We are on the plateau now, like a roller coaster teetering on the brink of the plummet, and nobody knows how long the plateau will last. The recession may buy us a few years and maybe give us a softer landing but I doubt it. I may not always agree with Kunstler but The Long Emergency is looking more and more prescient.

    181. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:10

      In terms of religion, the Soviet Union was relatively free of apocalyptic doomsday cults.

      They did have a big upsurge in apocalyptic doomsday cults, science denialism and loony-tunes pseudoscience after the Soviet empire went tits-up, however [can't be arsed looking up the Sci.Am article].
      There seems to be a pattern when empires fall apart… people are using the reassuring sense of national exceptionalism as a defense against the crappiness and pointlessness of their personal lives, until it SUDDENLY STOPS WORKING, whereupon they turn to more reassuring though even less reality-based belief systems. Big decline in rationality. Some smart person could probably use it as an indicator for imperial collapse.

    182. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:14

      Fox news resurrected Reagan for a reach-around again

      Seems to be that if a nation’s standard of living and general place in the world has declined since a particular administration, then rather than feeling nostalgic for the decisions that were made then, perhaps it would be more rational to wonder what was wrong about them.

    183. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:15

      tsam, His qualifying statement, not mine. Never really understood why he hates it. Every once and a while I give him such a bong-smokin’ over-the-top duuuuuuuuuuu-ude that he has to laugh, though

      I knew a guy who hated that too. Never understood it. I use that term at what is probably an irritating frequency.

    184. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:21

      Fundamentalism and conservatism are on the rise world wide. I really think this is 1918 to 1936 again. Many striking similarities. This time, however, the good guys are turning fascist.

      Every empire, past and present, you can trace it’s downfall to an obscene wealth gap. The endless wars and fervent nationalism are just another means to that end.

      I suppose that the most frightening and depressing part of it is that the people responsible for all this shit know what they’re doing to their country. They don’t care. By the time the worst of it hits, they’ll be long gone. They destroy everything for even more wealth that they couldn’t possibly spend in their lifetimes.

    185. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:40

      Fundamentalism and conservatism are on the rise world wide. I really think this is 1918 to 1936 again. Many striking similarities. This time, however, the good guys are turning fascist.

      Yeah, that’s kind of what’s scariest when contemplating the possibility that the U.S. might go down the fascist road. Last time it happened, at least there were democratic governments elsewhere that managed to put it down and keep the flame burning. But if we go dark side, who’s going to slap us down? Especially since we have WMDs that the bad guys the last time around could only dream of.

      I suppose that the most frightening and depressing part of it is that the people responsible for all this shit know what they’re doing to their country. They don’t care. By the time the worst of it hits, they’ll be long gone. They destroy everything for even more wealth that they couldn’t possibly spend in their lifetimes.

      Eh. Most of them probably choose not to think about it and to believe the shit that passes for news at places like the WSJ, even if part of them knows better. When you’re rich and powerful enough to’ve shut out reality your whole life, you’d probably get used to it as a defense mechanism.

    186. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:41

      Bitter expatriate mobsters let off drugs charges in exchange for information against others make the bestest sources for war intel EVAR.

      Tsam left out the bestest bit.

    187. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:46

      S. cerevisiae said,
      October 13, 2011 at 4:09

      Never read anything by Orlov other than that article, but Wikipedia’s making the rest of his work sound interesting indeed. Apparently he’s done quite a lot on that topic.

      There seems to be a pattern when empires fall apart… people are using the reassuring sense of national exceptionalism as a defense against the crappiness and pointlessness of their personal lives, until it SUDDENLY STOPS WORKING, whereupon they turn to more reassuring though even less reality-based belief systems. Big decline in rationality. Some smart person could probably use it as an indicator for imperial collapse.

      I suppose that’s what happened to Europe after the Roman Empire. One of the more severe cases of that happening…

    188. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:47

      Tsam left out the bestest bit.

      I suppose we both left out the best part, in that Iraq was a done deal long before these two dirtbags got paraded in front of the media. They were just part of the laser light show.

    189. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:48

      US public leading up to Iraq:

      ” OTAY WE GO WAR NOW YAY!”

      “WHO GOING WIN AMERICAN IDOL WOOT!”

    190. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:51

      The best value in scooters is called Buddy, I tell ya.
      .

    191. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 4:53

      But if we go dark side, who’s going to slap us down?

      It’s not a great comparison, but the Roman Empire was significantly bigger than the US, at least by some metrics (like say, domination of the known world at the time), and after they ate their own guts, they went down like something that goes down really easy.

    192. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:01

      After they went down, people in Europe forgot how to use cement.
      ~

    193. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:06

      jim: correct as usual

      *checks mailbox*

      Not even a complimentary framed & autographed wall-plaque?!?
      That @$%$# Soros is TOTALLY stiffin’ my ass!

    194. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:07

      I suppose that’s what happened to Europe after the Roman Empire. One of the more severe cases of that happening…

      Yah. That little “Dark Ages” thing.

      Kinda sucked, I hear.

    195. South America said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:07

      Fundamentalism and conservatism are on the rise world wide.

      *COUGH*

    196. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:08

      After they went down, people in Europe forgot how to use cement.

      1) That’s one hell of a blowjob.

      2) What the hell is the cement for?

    197. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:15

      By the time the worst of it hits, they’ll be long gone.

      They’re not going anywhere. When the worst of it hits, they’ll be cheering like mad, swilling champagne. If they can get it all to actually collapse, just think how cheap labor will be!

      They’re not really concerned that the surrounding nation will be turned into one giant pigshit lagoon. It’ll be fine at their estate. The only possible worry they have is the guillotine, and keeping that at bay is what paramilitary police forces and the abolition of civil rights are for.

    198. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:20

      if we go dark side, who’s going to slap us down?

      Oh, I think that’s what you’d call a self-correcting situation. Assuming it involves lots of shit getting blowed up real good, I can’t imagine the US letting anyone else in on the action. Empires nearly always lead to nasty infighting among would-be Emperors, not to mention growing unpleasantness from domestic “insurgents” who fail to understand the joys of sunset-to-dawn curfews, state censorship or summary executions.

      Also might be worth noting that even centuries later, the Roman shepherds grazing their flocks amid the ruins were all saying, “What? This? This is just a temporary setback. Rome will rule again, just you wait & see!”

      (Roman shepherds = PNAC?)

    199. wiley said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:20

      I suppose we both left out the best part, in that Iraq was a done deal long before these two dirtbags got paraded in front of the media. They were just part of the laser light show.

      Surely. I figured it might have been a bet about what would happen if we destroyed a nation and then sold it to the lowest bidder with the legal structure of a globalist’s wet dream while encouraging Americans to buy Hummers to guzzle the oil that Iraqis had been using the proceeds from to buy food and medical supplies. The Neo-cons could have their cake and tell the Iraqis that they could eat cake too.

    200. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:21

      It’ll be fine at their estate

      What is there, like 100 million guns in this country? Nobody even knows how many there are. Shotguns, handguns, rifles, assault rifles….shit. I don’t think things will be all champagne and tranquility at their estates. If I’m around, I’ll kill several of them before they get me.

    201. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:24

      “What? This? This is just a temporary setback. Rome will rule again, just you wait & see!”

      Save your Roman talents, boys! The South shall rise again!

    202. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:43

      The cement was to make concrete ducks.

      You know, aqua ducks.
      ~

    203. Jennifer said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:44

      What tsam said.

      I was just wondering if any of the rich fucks have yet started considering that getting all the paranoid nutjobs het up about someone (anyone) tryin’ to take away their guns may not have been all that great of an idea, after all.

    204. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 5:57

      It’s not a great comparison, but the Roman Empire was significantly bigger than the US, at least by some metrics (like say, domination of the known world at the time), and after they ate their own guts, they went down like something that goes down really easy.

      +

      Oh, I think that’s what you’d call a self-correcting situation. Assuming it involves lots of shit getting blowed up real good, I can’t imagine the US letting anyone else in on the action. Empires nearly always lead to nasty infighting among would-be Emperors, not to mention growing unpleasantness from domestic “insurgents” who fail to understand the joys of sunset-to-dawn curfews, state censorship or summary executions.

      Right… so, shittastic society followed by more but different shittastic society. Problem remains.

      The original fascist nightmare had a happy ending because other democracies were able to beat it to a pulp, rebuild the society that spawned it, and replace it with something better. If we ever went fascist, I’m saying I’m afraid it’d be your Roman Empire scenario and not that one that would play out – no one to beat us down, certainly no one to help us rebuild, and potentially (depending on how much damage we’d do to the rest of the world) no place left safe for democracy. Sure, fascism would collapse eventually, everything does, but even after that, the world it destroyed would still be gone for good, or at least for centuries to come.

    205. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:02

      The cement was to make concrete ducks.

      Kinky.

    206. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:03

      It’s really hard to predict where it would go. There has never been quite the odd balance of power we have now. An emergent China, a resurgent Russia, a Europe that is a complete enigma, and a declining Ultra Mega Super Badass Power who is totally willilng to battle it out for the last of the resources in the world. It’s hard to imagine us not taking everyone else down with us.

      Seems like a global power vacuum is a likely scenario, with the added bonus of NUKES. Yikes. I should shutup now.

    207. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:07

      Sure, fascism would collapse eventually, everything does, but even after that, the world it destroyed would still be gone for good, or at least for centuries to come.

      Sure seems like it. Then again, liberalism might make a huge comeback. It remains to be seen if we let it get too far gone before administering any first aid. It’s a little early to report the demise of USA. Then again, Herman Cain would make a magnificently perfect last American president, yes?

    208. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:07

      You know, aqua ducks.

      What a fowl pun.

    209. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:11

      LOL–you guys saw Hank Williams teh fat fuck on The View? WEARING A NY YANKEES JERSEY? Getting bawled out by Joy Behar? LOLZ
      Transcript of everything PHANK said:

      “yeah”
      “yeah”
      “yeah”
      “yeah”

      He was DYING to drop a HITLERBOMB. You know he was.

    210. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:13

      Herman Cain would make a magnificently perfect last American president, yes?

      9-9-9 is just 6-6-6 misspelled.

    211. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:15

      9-9-9 is just 6-6-6 misspelled.

      Let him who hath understanding reckon the number of the douche. For it is a human number. It’s number is nine hundred and ninety nine.

    212. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:18

      HAHAHA Hank looks like he’s sitting on top of an open barrel full of thumbtacks! This is cracking me the fuck up–he’s on an image repair tour! OH SWEET SWEET JUSTICE. He had to sit at a table with a BLACK WOMAN! AN UPPITY ONE NO LESS!

      I’m choking on my own laugh juice.

    213. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 6:46

      I don’t think the Romans took the logical tax-cutting step of protecting the Emperor with a Praetorian Guard recruited entirely from prison inmates.

    214. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:00

      the number of the douche

      lol

    215. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:02

      They did do some outsourcing though, S.C., that came back to bite them in the ass.
      ~

    216. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:13

      Actual Rick Perry quote:

      “…actually the reason that we fought the revolution in the 16th century was to get away from that kind of onerous crown if you will.”

    217. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:16

      The cement was to make concrete ducks.

      but if it doesn’t float, doesn’t that make it a wich?

    218. John Revolta said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:18

      Florida tough guy is tough

      Snark fails me w/this one……………………..

    219. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:22

      Florida State Rep. Brad Drake (R-Wackjob) Advocates Execution by Firing Squad; is “So Tired of Being Humane”
      http://www.balloon-juice.com/

    220. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:23

      Damn you John.

    221. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:30

      Bitch needs a new angle.

      A woman who has been seeking to inspect President Barack Obama’s original birth certificate has run into another road block. Circuit Court Judge Rhonda Nishimura granted the state’s motion to dismiss a request by Dr. Orly Taitz to see that certificate.

      The state says it has verified that the president’s birth certificate is real. http://www.rumproast.com/

    222. John Revolta said,

      October 13, 2011 at 7:42

      Nya-ah-ah!!

      I love the part about the Waffle House.

    223. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 8:23

      Florida State Rep. Brad Drake (R-Wackjob) Advocates Execution by Firing Squad; is “So Tired of Being Humane”

      Frightening – In a “Holy shit! That monkey’s figured out how to work a flamethrower!” kind of way.

    224. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 13, 2011 at 10:17

      Why do I know I’m going to die being eaten by a cannibal horde? Like tsam, I won’t go out alone.

      I never should have read Collapse. or A Canticle For Leibowitz. or The Long Emergency. or Twilight in the Desert. etc. etc. etc.

      Fuck food, I’m stocking up on booze and weed.

    225. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 10:30

      Smut reveals his New Dark Age.

    226. Old Man Bowman said,

      October 13, 2011 at 10:36

      “So Tired of Being Humane”

      I haz a Sad

    227. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 10:47

      “So Tired of Being Humane”
      Also known as “the pain of being a man”, which according to Dr Johnson’s prescription can be alleviated by making a beast of oneself.

    228. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 10:55

      Florida State Rep. Brad Drake (R-Wackjob) Advocates Execution by Firing Squad

      There’s nothing especially painful about death by firing-squad, and there’s no obvious cost difference compared to usual methods of civilian execution. The reason countries avoid firing squads (and presumably the main attraction for Rep. Brad Drake) is that they are only suitable for a garrison state where every citizen is subject to military discipline

    229. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 13:50

      That, or perhaps a gun-nut state, S.C.?
      ~

    230. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 14:09

      I see state profits!

      $ 5,000.00 to be on the firing squad. Bring your own rifle.

    231. N__B said,

      October 13, 2011 at 14:18

      “Holy shit! That monkey’s figured out how to work a flamethrower!”

      It’s like you can see into my deepest dreams.

    232. John Revolta said,

      October 13, 2011 at 14:54

      Well, the “cool” thing about the firing squad is that no one person can be blamed for killing anybody. It’s democratic!!!11!!!111!

      Also too, it’s a lot faster & more efficient than most other methods.

      But, why fuck around? In China, they do you with a single shot in the back of the head.

      And, when you charge the deceased’s family for the bullet, it adds a lovely taste of poison to the whole procedure!

    233. Ted the Slacker said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:03

      Low-hanging fruit this, and so full of sadlynoyoumoron, but mainly I feel a sense of duty to share this great moment of ZOMG TEH FEMNINAZIS HAZ STOLN MAH MANHOOD!!!11!

    234. vacuumslayer said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:05

      “So tired of being humane”

      For realz, right?! When did kicking kittens become a “bad thing?”

    235. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:09

      In Brad Drake’s defense, at least it wasn’t stoning. Yet.

    236. N__B said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:16

      When did kicking kittens become a “bad thing?”

      Sometime after Ambrose Bierce died. Click on “cat”.

    237. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:17

      OMG TEH FEMNINAZIS HAZ STOLN MAH MANHOOD!!!11!

      i bet dildos really make him cry…

    238. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:18

      Comments of awesome at ted’s link. Same old “stupid bitchez is missing out on ALL THIS!” Think of it: a fried food and cheeto sculped blob of sweaty manhood to lay on you for a grand total of 44 seconds if he’s got whiskeydick. Hairy nose, hairy ears, eyebrows that reach his combover. Shit, what MORE DO YOU WANT?

      Yeah, you bitter bitches don’t know what you’re missing.

    239. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:24

      Comments of awesome at ted’s link.

      i couldn’t bring myself to read the comments after the first one consisted of: yeah, well those women aren’t worth it anywayz…

      i instead chose to check out brad drake’s voting record and guess what? SPOILER ALERT: he’s pro life, pro guns and voted no to extending unemployment benefits…bet he also thinks the drug testing for food stamps is awesome…

    240. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:36

      wah wah wah

      Insanity

      Submitted by ljacone on Wed, 10/12/2011 – 4:30pm.

      I love the arrogant insanity of the Left sometimes. Traditional marriage and family, concepts which date back for centuries and have been the building block of civilization, are now “outdated” to the Left in their infinite wisdom. Nevermind the mountains of evidence in support of marriage and family. No, your immediate gratification is paramount; all else is irrelevant.

      Liberals call us “weak,” but instant gratification is easy. Sexual promiscuity and sex with no strings attached is easy (assuming you can get some action). You need condoms? Go ask your teenage neice, she got some for free at school. You forget to take your pill and get pregnant? No problem, we have an abortion clinic ready for you. It’s easy to make yourself happy.

      You know what’s hard? Marriage is HARD. Raising a family is HARD. Which is why Liberals shy away from it or despise it. Your immediate gratification is no longer paramount; by definition someone else must take priority.

      You know the old saying that every generation thinks they are the ones who invented sex? The Left think that they are currently inventing civilization.

      ~

    241. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:56

      You know what’s hard? Marriage is HARD. Raising a family is HARD. Which is why Liberals shy away from it or despise it. Your immediate gratification is no longer paramount; by definition someone else must take priority.

      Yes, that’s why rates divorce and teen pregnancy are highest in THE BIBLE BELT. Of course, that’s just liberal influence, right?

      LOL–he said HARD.

    242. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 15:59

      There’s nothing especially painful about death by firing-squad, and there’s no obvious cost difference compared to usual methods of civilian execution. The reason countries avoid firing squads (and presumably the main attraction for Rep. Brad Drake) is that they are only suitable for a garrison state where every citizen is subject to military discipline

      Too, there were troubling instances of remorse on the part of the prison guards who fired at the prisoner.

      We cannot tolerate empathy in our prisons, dammit!

    243. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:00

      Marriage is HARD. Raising a family is HARD. Which is why Liberals shy away from it or despise it.

      This is why divorce rates in Red States are unfailingly high as compared to Blue States: Liberals hate marriage.

      Wait. What?

    244. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:00

      DAMN YOU, TSAM!

    245. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:00

      And damn me for actually tackling an issue of substance first…

    246. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:01

      Tackling the issue. Heh.

    247. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:02

      And damn me for actually tackling an issue of substance first…

      Jokes before substance, I always say. Wait, no I don’t.

      Never mind.

    248. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:03

      to’ve

      There’s a valid contraction that should be shot in the face with an Italian ladies’ shotgun.
      .

    249. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:04

      Too, there were troubling instances of remorse on the part of the prison guards who fired at the prisoner.

      At one time they got randomly selected with blanks or a live bullet, with the assumption that a guy who lined up and fired the weapon wouldn’t feel the recoil of an actual bullet and thus never be sure if he fired the fatal shot or not.

      It didn’t work.

    250. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:05

      to’ve

      When prounounced “tuv”, it sounds fine.

    251. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:16

      Traditional marriage and family, concepts which date back for centuries and have been the building block of civilization, are now “outdated” to the Left in their infinite wisdom.

      Wow, SOMEbody really wants to fuck his brother’s widow.

    252. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:16

      When prounounced “tuv”, it sounds fine.

      Oh, sure — and it’s perfectly valid, as far as that goes. Still, it reads like something the cat yakked up.
      .

    253. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:19

      And damn me for actually tackling an issue of substance first…

      Woof, that is HOT.

    254. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:22

      Still, it reads like something the cat yakked up.

      Come to think of it, I HAVE heard Larry the Cable Guy using that contraction.

      It is hereby banned.

    255. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:23

      Woof, that is HOT.

      Have I shown you my etchings?

    256. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:24

      It is hereby banned

      To’ve been, or not to’ve been.

    257. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:25

      The Left think that they are currently inventing civilization.

      Ha, no, just working against the forces working to destroy it while claiming to be conserving it.

      Also, am I a bad person because I laughed that the details of Drake’s desire to bring back the electric chair was published in something called “The Current?”

    258. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:27

      Have I shown you my etchings?

      I figured you as more a one for frottage.

    259. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:29

      I’m almost proud to say I had to Google “frottage”. I didn’t particularly like what I saw.

    260. kg said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:34

      damn you, N_B. every time I visit The Devil’s Dictionary I end up spending way too much time there.

    261. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:38

      I figured you as more a one for frottage.

      It’s more trompe l’oeil than etchings, actually.

    262. Thread Bear said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:44

      Also, am I a bad person because I laughed that the details of Drake’s desire to bring back the electric chair was published in something called “The Current?”

      This got a chuckle from me as well. Also, “The Current” also goes well with Drake’s other suggestion of just throwing people of the Sunshine Skyway bridge.

    263. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:46

      I’m almost proud to say I had to Google “frottage”. I didn’t particularly like what I saw.

      Really?

    264. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:47

      Stunning display of total unawareness.
      .

    265. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:48

      Do you suppose the OWS movement needs and enforcement wing?

      Cuz that’s what I want to do.

    266. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:51

      LOL–further definitions of frottage, according to Wiki.

    267. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:55

      Also: GO FUCK YOURSELF, POLITICO

      The tea party’s swift counteroffensive — which is remarkably similar to the left’s response to the fledgling conservative movement when it burst onto the scene in 2009 — suggests that the onetime rag-tag operation has matured and feels the need to protect its reputation as the nation’s leading grass-roots protest movement.

      No, it’s not similar in the least. And no, that operation hasn’t matured and there was nothing grass-roots about it. Also, I’ve had just about enough of that bullshit term, grass-roots. It’s irritating.

      Yes, the teabaggers DO want to crush this movement now, because they know what the scoreboard is going to look like when it’s over. You have to be a billionaire or a fucking moron to be in the Tea Party. That’s far from a majority in this country. Morons seem to be gaining ground, however.

    268. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 16:57

      WHAT THE FUCK? REMARKABLY SIMILAR? ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING? TSAM MAD!

    269. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:12

      LOL–further definitions of frottage, according to Wiki.

      I can see how rubbing someone’s dirty bits might might be traumatic. I WEPT AND WEPT when I found out. Mother soothed me. She’s up in the attic now, want to say hi?

    270. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:17

      That, or perhaps a gun-nut state

      Firing squads are vicarious penis enlargement for Drake.

    271. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:23

      Also: GO FUCK YOURSELF, POLITICO

      What’s really weird is, the Teabaggers are the ones getting their panties in a knot because….one OWS protestor said they were “part tea party”. Not “We’re going to knock them off their (ed note bought and paid for) mantle” or “We’re the true tea party”

      Only that OWS is inclusive of anyone who hates the patent unfairness of the American economy. Which would normally include Teabaggers if they actually stopped yammering long enough to think about it.
      .
      .
      .
      .
      .
      .
      .

      OK, I think I see the problem….

    272. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:24

      Shit, I haven’t been down there in a while. I ought to make a point to attend more often! And bring my etchings!

    273. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:25

      LOL–finally leveling the Soros accusations

      What took ya so long?

    274. Pryme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:26

      TSAM MAD!

      umm…”tsam smash puny Politico?”

    275. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:30

      umm…”tsam smash puny Politico?”

      Seriously, man. “remarkably similar”? How fucking insulting is that?

    276. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:32

      She’s waiting for you,
      actor212
      ~

    277. Ted the Slacker said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:35

      So you come across something like this and you think, easy, just root for injuries. But wait a moment…

      “When theological differences are demonized by the faithful of any religion—never mind by a clergyman—it makes a mockery of their own religion.”

      “Any religion”? I genuinely try not to gratuitously mock people’s religions (I fail sometimes, I’m human – just as some God’s allegedly intended), but thanks to Bill Donahue I now can wait for the religious douchies to mock themselves? Okay then.

    278. N__B said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:36

      damn you, N_B. every time I visit The Devil’s Dictionary I end up spending way too much time there.

      Check out Bierce’s definition of “architect” and you have the story of my life.

    279. N__B said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:37

      Mother soothed me. She’s up in the attic now, want to say hi?

      Now I’m stuck with the mental image of Norman’s-mother goatse.

    280. andonandon said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:38

      Small aircraft and commercial airplanes are releasing massive amounts of chemicals in the air, creating an atmosphere of subduement, and confusion; affecting cloud cumulations and precipitation; and altering memory retention. The air contamination must cease.

      The use of word transpositioning and electronic messaging with the use of various newer spyware and communication technologies in conjunction with the synchatron is creating forcefields of pressure in the atmosphere. Due to the efforts of many information technologies specialists, physicists and other talented individuals, the effects of these technologies has been minimized. Rapid increases in air pressure within flight paths and air tunnels is a public hazard, and puts passengers and flight personnel at risk. Wind tunnels force flight paths, forcing stop-overs, and creating influx’s in certain areas. Murderers and abducted persons are being sent to Saskatoon, Canada, steadily, daily.

      Surgeries, procedures, disguises, alias, and fraudulent documentation are being utilized at borders and stations. Displacement and abductions contribute to mass confusion, and the evasion of culpability of terrorists.

      The Pacific Army therefore recommends all nations consider no-fly zones for some areas. Airport, train and border security have the technologies, such as retinal scans that eliminate the possibility of fraudulent activity. Unfortunately, there is complicity at security levels. We, The Pacific Army encourage all racial-profiling activity to cease and desist.

      This is a state of emergency.

      The sattelites need to come down, now.

      There will be a world wide iniative to prevent the escape of criminals. They will be grounded, there will be mass arrests at this time. The time needs to be soon.

      Sincerely, Jenny and my twin, AKA Ashley or Steven, but that’s not his real name, on behalf of The Pacific Army.

    281. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:38

      LOL–finally leveling the Soros accusations

      So because Soros said something a little encouraging about the Canadian group, and gave a few bucks to another organization who funded (not necessarily Soros’) money to Adbusters, tens of thousands of people suddenly got off their asses in America (where Adbusters has been effectively banned, I should add) and started protesting?

      As opposed to, say, the Koch brothers building FreedomWorks under the auspices of Dick Armey and the entire GOP?

    282. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:38

      andonandon

      Well, at least it’s not Dennis.

    283. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:40

      She’s waiting for you,
      actor212

      That was a very painful relationship and I’ll thank you not to remind me of lost love, Thunder…

    284. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:41


      “The left is trying to create a counter force to the tea party, but it’s almost laughable that anyone is comparing the two, because they’re totally different,” said Sal Russo, chief strategist for the Tea Party Express.

      EXACTLY! i have seen ZERO (ZED) hoverrounds at ows…

    285. N__B said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:43

      If hover rounds actually hovered, I’d like them much more.

    286. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:44

      Shit, I haven’t been down there in a while

      wow…i had to keep checking the masthead to make sure i wasn’t reading the onion…

    287. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:44

      checking the masthead…

    288. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:48

      herein lies the difference:

      He has pledged to give away all his wealth, half of it while he earns it and the rest when he dies.

      i mean, soros is huge in philanthropic circles…is that why the fuckwads dislike him so much? he’s doing the ‘jesus didn’t say the government should do it, he said that i should do it?’ that victoria jackson was yammering about?

    289. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:48

      When theological differences are demonized by the faithful of any religion—never mind by a clergyman—it makes a mockery of their own religion.

      Muslims don’t count. No Hindoos!

    290. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:53

      So you come across something like this and you think, easy, just root for injuries. But wait a moment…
      “Any religion”? I genuinely try not to gratuitously mock people’s religions (I fail sometimes, I’m human – just as some God’s allegedly intended), but thanks to Bill Donahue I now can wait for the religious douchies to mock themselves? Okay then.

      1) I geniunely try to mock all religions with an equal amount of mockery I throw at the people on TV telling me about ghosts in their attics and flying saucers probing their anuses. It is very sanctimonious of me, I admit it. Perhaps someday I’ll find some fucks to give.

      B) Bill Donahue talking about someone else being nasty and mocking….let’s see DOES NOT COMPUTE. He’s among the worst of them. When I think I’m too angry and stupid, I load up some Youtube of Donahue talking about stuff and feel much better. Life’s not so bad, I’m not him.

    291. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:53

      So you come across something like this and you think, easy, just root for injuries. But wait a moment…

      why is it that christianity is teh bomb until some minister slips up? then it’s like…oh! get as far as you can from this intolerance!!! do they not realize that by doing this they are actually reinforcing the church/state separation argument?

    292. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:54

      is that why the fuckwads dislike him so much?

      He’s a billionaire who’s not white and not a scuzzy Galtian psychopath.

      What’s not to hate?

    293. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 17:57

      d’oh…hubbkf just emailed me that the framed print he donated to our local developmental acheivement center’s annual auction got dropped…glass shattered and frame damaged…suckiness…

    294. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:01

      Shit, I haven’t been down there in a while

      FY Post, I ain’t loading your app. No. Fucking. Way.

    295. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:03

      ha, ha…frame damaged sounds kinda funny in that sentence…

    296. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:03

      do they not realize that by doing this they are actually reinforcing the church/state separation argument?

      No.

      /SASQ

    297. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:05

      Today our company hired on four temps, they will be in our call center until spring. A that time three lucky winners will be fired and the loser will have to take a permanent full time job in our call center.

    298. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:06

      wow…i had to keep checking the masthead to make sure i wasn’t reading the onion…

      Yeah, that read like a hobotown screed printed with type carved out of tree bark. I bet a couple pages on there was a recipe for armadillo.

    299. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:07

      Today our company hired on four temps, they will be in our call center until spring. A that time three lucky winners will be fired and the loser will have to take a permanent full time job in our call center.

      wow…almost like winning shirley jackson’s lottery…

    300. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:08

      /SASQ

      isrl?

    301. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:08

      “The left is trying to create a counter force to the tea party, but it’s almost laughable that anyone is comparing the two, because they’re totally different,” said Sal Russo, chief strategist for the Tea Party Express.

      For one thing, OWS doesn’t have a professional political type like Sal Russo plotting strategy.
      ~

    302. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:09

      he’s doing the ‘jesus didn’t say the government should do it, he said that i should do it?’ that victoria jackson was yammering about?

      He’s Jewish

    303. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:13

      wow…i had to keep checking the masthead to make sure i wasn’t reading the onion…

      I don’t know which ads popped up in the sidebar when you went there, but I thought it was the height of irony in a New York Post article chiding the libidinous hedonism going on at OWS, including links to headline for other articles that panickly screamed FAMILIES BRINGING CHILDREN TO OCCUPY WALL STREET! was a come-on link to the Girls of Page Six.

      Page Six of the NY Post….

    304. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:15

      Oops. Supposed to be a linky there

      Page Six of the New York Post

    305. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:15

      He’s Jewish

      regardless, he’s walking the walk, not talking the talk like those sanctimonious, parsinomious twats…

    306. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:19

      SASQUATCH ISREAL(lyhairy)!

    307. Strawliberal said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:21

      I love the arrogant insanity of the Left sometimes. Traditional marriage and family, concepts which date back for centuries and have been the building block of civilization, are now “outdated” to the Left in their infinite wisdom.

      Um…

    308. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:21

      “Iran Epic Fail” trifecta now in play

    309. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:21

      “The left is trying to create a counter force to the tea party, but it’s almost laughable that anyone is comparing the two, because they’re totally different,” said Sal Russo, chief strategist for the Tea Party Express.

      Indeed, because the lighting of the teabagger fuse was Santelli’s bitching about the possibility of mortgage assistance for individuals, for Christ’s sake; seriously, after the government spent TRILLIONS bailing out his still unprosecuted cronies this asshole moans FROM THE CHICAGO TRADING FLOOR that a little money might be spent to help individual people in trouble might via cram-downs or whatever and that was what got those idiots up in arms enough to protest. So yeah, they are not only totally different, they are exactly opposite.

    310. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:27

      SASQ ISREAL!

    311. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:28

      Um…

      i know! that’s a lot of butthurt over women saying, ‘yeah dudes…we might shag you, but we don’t necessarily feel like we need to marry you’ isn’t it?

      haven’t men been trying to score teh wimmens w/out having to marry the bitches for like, ever?

    312. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:31

      haven’t men been trying to score teh wimmens w/out having to marry the bitches for like, ever?

      God bless NOW.

    313. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:32

      God bless NOW.

      you would think d00ds would be grateful for now, but no…they choose instead to be pissed off cuz women won’t pick up their poo-poo undies anymore…

    314. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:34

      they choose instead to be pissed off cuz women won’t pick up their poo-poo undies anymore

      And then touch me? Hell no!

    315. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:35

      God bless NOW.

      And THEN.

      Not to mention GOOD ‘n’ PLENTY.
      .

    316. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:36

      Not to mention GOOD ‘n’ PLENTY

      I was more partial to JuJuBes myself

    317. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:38

      GOOD ‘n’ PLENTY.

      want now…

    318. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:38

      but not good ‘n’ fruity…cuz god don’t swing that way, dontcha know…

    319. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:39

      Mike and Ike must be an abomination, then.

    320. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:40

      but not good ‘n’ fruity…cuz god don’t swing that way, dontcha know…

      Dammit! And Rich Lowrie ruined Starbursts for me forever!

    321. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:41

      Mike and Ike must be an abomination, then.

      Oddly, conservatives like their beef jerky….

    322. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:43

      but who doesn’t like jolly joe?!?!? amirite?

    323. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:44

      but who doesn’t like jolly joe?!?!? amirite?

      I suck teh Jolly Rancher.

    324. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:46

      This (and its follow-ups) ought to be the next S,N! post, IMO.
      .

    325. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:46

      Atomic Fireballs!

    326. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:46

      Oddly, conservatives like their beef jerky….

      Jerking the beef. Who DOESN’T like that?

    327. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:47

      Hot Tamales, baby!
      ~

    328. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:48

      Atomic Fireballs!

      there’s a cream for that…

    329. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:49

      Double Zout!

      Confession Time: I actually do like double zouts. Mmmm salty licorice.

    330. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:53

      I don’t often eat candy, but when I do, it’s Blow Pops.

      Stay sucky, mah friends.

    331. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:54

      Blow Pops

      It’s a noun AND a sentence!

    332. Thread Bear said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:55

      I Want Candy

    333. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:55

      Confession Time: I actually do like double zouts. Mmmm salty licorice.

      d’oh…a friend of mine gave me some black licorice fish things that had a salt covering…DID. NOT. LIKE. i love me some black licorice* but not with salt…i couldn’t even swallow it! i do like those little m&m-like things that are black lic and chocolate, though…do they come from canada?

      *NO, it’s NOT!

    334. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:56

      Jefferson Airplane!

    335. Pops said,

      October 13, 2011 at 18:59

      YES PLEASE

    336. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:00

      that had a salt covering…DID. NOT. LIKE.
      not with salt…i couldn’t even swallow it!

      Just. walk. away….

    337. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:01

      I Want Candy

      BOW(chicka) WOW WOW!

    338. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:02

      i do like those little m&m-like things that are black lic and chocolate, though…do they come from canada?

      SKITTLES?
      ~

    339. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:02

      Just. walk. away….

      heh…i knew only a master could walk away from that bait…

    340. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:04

      SKITTLES?

      nope…they are totally look like m&ms but they have black licorice in the middle…my bro-in-law’s dad brought some back from a fishing trip in canada once and it was love at first bite for me…

    341. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:04

      do they come from canada?

      If they do, I haven’t seen ‘em. There is this from Down Under.

      DZ’s aren’t anywhere near as salty as teh linked article pretends. It’s a delicious balance between salty and sweet with that anise flavour smothering it all. Yum.

    342. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:05

      not with salt…i couldn’t even swallow it!

      *pointing*

      You got a little something on your chin…

    343. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:05

      Reese’s or GTFO.

    344. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:07

      You got a little something on your chin…

      THAT IS ICE CREAM!

    345. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:07

      Licorice lentils, perhaps?

    346. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:09

      Fruit Stripe gum for me.

    347. Pryme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:09

      Ah, simplicity.

      Shorter MSN Money: Silly OWS’ers…Don’t protest; just make something people will want to buy!!

      Yeah, because the existing corporations whose pie you’re cutting into will just let you enter their market, and won’t try to destroy you (or buy you out, if you’re lucky).

    348. Thread Bear said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:10

      Jefferson Airplane!

      One sweet gives you chocolate
      And one sweet gives you praline
      But the ones that China gives you
      Have formalin and melamine

    349. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:10

      Yeah, because the existing corporations whose pie you’re cutting into will just let you enter their market, and won’t try to destroy you

      Bingo.

    350. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:12

      “The left is trying to create a counter force to the tea party, but it’s almost laughable that anyone is comparing the two, because they’re totally different,” said Sal Russo, chief strategist for the Tea Party Express.

      Hmmmmmmm.

      Teabaggers = probably planned during the 2008 election if not earlier, heavy Astroturf up the wazoo, nearly everything they say is laughably wrong, overwhelmingly old, actually just the Religious Right hiding Jeebus behind a tricorner hat, support fading away by the minute, not popular AT ALL.

      OWS = Wall Street demos were planned but the epic crowds (& the massive outbreak of “OCCUPY” demos throughout North America) are obviously spontaneous, real grassroots, a huge list of grievances – nearly all of which are dead-right, overwhelmingly young or middle-aged, speading like wildfire, popular as free blowjobs.

      I see his point.

    351. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:12

      you’re right actor…i just found them…

    352. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:31

      I suppose it’s not surprising, but eating salty licorice apparently is a YouTube meme. There’s even one video where teh candy makes a little boy run away from home. Probably for teh best considering teh child abuse and all.

    353. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:34

      There’s even one video where teh candy makes a little boy run away from home. Probably for teh best considering teh child abuse and all.

      did she want the kid to piss his pants for the rest of his life or what?

    354. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:41

      Shorter MSN Money: Silly OWS’ers…Don’t protest; just make something people will want to buy

      That seems to be the latest up is down trope. The other night Cain said “Production drives the economy” and he was IN THE ECONOMY (as Mittens puts it). It’s a shame no one asked him how many pizzas he’s making right now.

    355. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:44

      The other night Cain said “Production drives the economy”

      Ask some of the people he threw out of work how production-driven their economy is right now.

    356. jim said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:53

      Double Zout = ♥ !

      Yet I also have an undying ♥ ♥ ♥ for teh Nougat Praline … which is very sweet indeed.

    357. Cerberus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 19:59

      What struck me about the “EEEK BITCHES AIN’T MARRYIN’” link is that they basically took a news station fluff story (usual accuracy on these is usually somewhere near Tea Party manifesto levels) and basically just buys it wholesale in complete freakout.

      Oh my word, a news station is filling some time so they don’t have to talk about OWS by doing the usual “bitches aren’t getting married enough” angle but with an extra level of “we’re not even judging because we don’t want the women to get upset and turn off the tv and start surfing the net” and this equals “Eek, no woman will ever marry again, singleness is a direct dagger at the heart of traditional marriage and the end of the universe. Also feminazis are stealing my balls and men have become irrelevant”

      I mean, talk about all of your self esteem being tied into the patriarchy. I wonder how this fucker reacts to the “new trend” of women marrying women.

      Also, wow, way to be an over-trusting idiot. It’s a media fluff piece and he reacts to it completely without an analytical bone in his body. I imagine him watching TV instantly buying the world of each commercial as it happens: “I do need estrogen pills because my period has been irregular at best! Why yes, my hair isn’t as shiny as I would want, good point TV, it’s probably those bitches fault for draining my precious bodily fluids.”

    358. Cerberus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:00

      Salty licorice.

      Practically the national candy in Scandanavia. It was everywhere in Denmark and I can’t stand regular black licorice.

      That is all.

    359. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:00

      re: teh 53.

      Is Irksome part of teh 53? Here’s an LGM post.

      Irksome is claiming that his radio gig and CNN job are very modest. RedState may bring in some bucks, but I imagine that it also serves as an excellent excuse for him to write off a shitload of expenses. His mortgage interest deductions alone are probably in teh neighbourhood of $25K.

      Considering how much stock he puts into teh importance of paying personal federal income tax, maybe he should show us his 1040 amount owing. And teh long form vault copy too.

    360. kg said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:01

      give me a handful of sen-sen any day.

    361. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:03

      SHUT THE FUCK UP

      “DONNY” implied.
      .

    362. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:05

      I actually liked Necco wafers. I was a weird kid.

    363. Cerberus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:06

      On the teabagger response to OWS, I’m loving it.

      The pose when the masters have been selling the teabaggers to moderates has always been “oh, these isn’t an astroturf of racist KKK members who are freaking out about the first black president and will attack any liberal group we tell them to, they are just a bunch of concerned citizens angry about the bailout of Wall Street”.

      This despite the fact that they regularly come on the side of the rich and powerful on every issue, because, a-duh, those are the forces fronting the bills and bussing the 17 people to stand in a line and be hyped up on the media as the second coming of Jesus.

      And now a real genuine populist response to Wall Street has happened and the Teabaggers have to be mobilized in opposition and there’s just no way to spin that as anything other than being the hired stooges of the rich. Yes, they hate Wall Street so much they run to their aid at the first sign of resistance. Truly the real populist response in action.

      Also, this makes me wonder if one of the points was to try and discourage things like OWS, by making the idea of being a “populist group angered by Wall Street” look like a terrible idea because then people might confuse you with the racist psychotics in the Tea Party if you claimed those were your main goals. Sure, you can rise up against us, but people might think you are a teabagger, so best to just stay home and impotently stew.

    364. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:08

      I actually liked Necco wafers. I was a weird kid.

      I’m afraid I have breaking news for you, Pup…
      .

    365. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:08

      I agree with Necco wafers. Yum!

      BUT OMG CHECK THE WIKIPEDIA!

      The ingredients in Necco Wafers are sugar, corn syrup, gelatin (an animal by-product), gums, colorings, and flavorings.[2] They are commonly known as the favourite candy of the extremely elderly or those suffering from dementia[citation needed] .

    366. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:10

      Salty licorice.

      Practically the national candy in Scandanavia. It was everywhere in Denmark and I can’t stand regular black licorice.

      “Licorice is the liver of candy.”

      –Michael O’Donaghue

    367. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:11

      [catching up]
      I’m wondering if the end-game of all this will look more like Snow Crash, Mariposa or Riddley Walker… Probably something completely different.

      If there’s some semblance of society remaining with at least basic agriculture I hope to be able to survive via my knowledge of brewing, since software development will probably be useless. That’s if my ammunition holds out during the initial unrest of course.
      [/catching up]

      And no love for Sour Patch Kids?

    368. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:22

      Is it the depressing or the sour that killed it?

    369. Pryme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:22

      The 1%’ers get some help from their fictional counterparts.

    370. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:24

      I actually liked Necco wafers. I was a weird kid.

      They make great POGs when you don’t have spare milk bottles.

    371. Hogeye Grex said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:26

      I actually liked Necco wafers. I was a weird kid.

      Thirded on Neccos. Especially the pink ones that might as well be a dried up dollop of Pepto Bismol.

      Alright, yeah. I was a little weird too.

      Was, okay!

    372. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:28

      They are commonly known as the favourite candy of the extremely elderly or those suffering from dementia[citation needed] .

      Man, trolling a Wiki candy entry is just below contempt.

    373. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:28

      How about Crunchy Frog?

      Hey OBS which brewer is at Brew Station today?

    374. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:28

      Practically the national candy in Scandanavia. It was everywhere in Denmark and I can’t stand regular black licorice.

      “Licorice is the liver of candy.”

      –Michael O’Donaghue

      If you understood the Scandahoovian palate, you’d understand this is not an insult.

    375. Chris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:31

      Also, this makes me wonder if one of the points was to try and discourage things like OWS, by making the idea of being a “populist group angered by Wall Street” look like a terrible idea because then people might confuse you with the racist psychotics in the Tea Party if you claimed those were your main goals. Sure, you can rise up against us, but people might think you are a teabagger, so best to just stay home and impotently stew.

      A lot of this kind of populist rage is unfocused, primal and generally pointed at “people in power” in general, so, I think the teabagger idea there was to pre-empt OWS by co-opting enough of that general anger at the powerful and redirecting it onto Obama and the Democrats (not too hard since they were the ones running the White House and both houses of government).

      Not their only purpose in politics, but in regards to post-2008 populism I think that’s what it was.

    376. g said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:38

      Practically the national candy in Scandanavia. It was everywhere in Denmark and I can’t stand regular black licorice.

      First time I encountered salt licorice I was in Norway. I damn near died.

    377. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:41

      Hey OBS which brewer is at Brew Station today?

      21st Amendment from San Fran… You going? I’m hoping to be there sometime after 5 or so…

    378. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:43

      Hey Irky Irksome! You know who is part of teh 53%?

      Joe Biden.

    379. Steerpike said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:45

      I’m wondering if the end-game of all this will look more like Snow Crash, Mariposa or Riddley Walker… Probably something completely different.

      More like “The Road”

    380. gocart mozart said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:46

      actor212 said,
      October 13, 2011 at 16:00

      And damn me for actually tackling an issue of substance first…

      SMG is just not that into you actor.

    381. g said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:46

      so the teabaggers rode the bus Dick Armey chartered, or they drove the Suburban downtown to the Teabagger protest site; they brought their scooters or their folding lawnchairs, hoisted their sign-shop-made signs and stood in front of Fox News cameras (summoned by press releases sent out by Freedom Works or Teabaggrs R US) for a couple of hours, then packed it all into the bus bay or the back of the SUV, and went back to their gated communities.

      OWS has been camping out for 3 weeks, 24/7, sleeping under tarps and on broken-down carboard boxes.

      and the worst the Teabaggers can throw at them is “Ew, those people are using McDonald’s toilets!”

    382. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 20:49

      Another influential tech pioneer has passed

    383. S. cerevisiae said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:03

      I have a class until just after five but I will be there for a few. I do have to get home to watch the new-look Wild play Edmonton (NHL games are free right now).

    384. tsam said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:04

      Hey Irky Irksome! You know who is part of teh 53%?

      I’m part of the 53%. The difference is that I AM a job creator, I do work my ass off, and I’m not dumb like Irksome.

    385. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:14

      SMG is just not that into you actor.

      Well, he was, or there wouldn’t be any issue.

    386. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:22

      Another influential tech pioneer has passed

      kill(mortality)

    387. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:34

      with that anise flavour smothering it all.

      Dammit, now I want chilled ouzo.

    388. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:36

      My first edition K&R just soared in value!

    389. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:39

      Dammit, now I want chilled ouzo.

      Now, I wanna throw up in my mouth, a little.
      .

    390. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:39

      Chilled? There’s only one real way to drink ouzo.

    391. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:41

      My first edition K&R just soared in value!

      Ritchie’s book? My friend has an autographed one, but only by Kernighan.

      Guess he won’t be getting the “R”.

    392. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:41

      Chilled? There’s only one real way to drink ouzo.

      Takes allthe alcohol out, tho.

      Try that with grappa but you’d better wear goggles.

    393. kingubu said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:43

      Ouzo: life’s answer to the eternal question “what would liquid concentrated mule ass taste like?”

    394. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:45

      Ouzo: life’s answer to the eternal question “what would liquid concentrated mule ass taste like?”

      Look, it’s better than retsina.

      Which I would drink if it was free. Do not mind the shaking hands.

    395. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:46

      Glug is the drug I’m thinking ug.
      .

    396. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:46

      Takes allthe alcohol out, tho.

      Yesandno. Some folks extinquish teh shot with their hands before drinking and think they are all cool with their funky vacuum shot glass trick. But of you’re careful you can pour teh shot completely into your mouth whilst it is still flaming and not do severe personal or proerty damage. For that to work, you gotta do it before teh glass gets too hot, so not that much hooch burns off.

    397. kingubu said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:46

      Er, of course I meant grappa, not ouzo. I blame Barefoot In The Park.

    398. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:46

      Ouzo: life’s answer to the eternal question “what would liquid concentrated mule ass taste like?”

      I thought that was pear brandy?

    399. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:48

      Look, it’s better than retsina.

      Hush your mouth. Retsina is teh cheap gin of wines – a sure winner amongst women of more advanced years.

    400. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:50

      Hush your mouth. Retsina is teh cheap gin of wines – a sure winner amongst women of more advanced years.

      Only because Pine-Sol reminds them of better days.

    401. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:50

      But of you’re careful you can pour teh shot completely into your mouth whilst it is still flaming and not do severe personal or proerty damage.

      In a dim, dark, dingy Greenwich Village dive once resided a drink so toxic, so lethal, it was termed “The Flaming Suicide”

      (Sadly, a Google search only turns up a poor imitation)

      Ouzo, with a float of anisette poured on top over the back of a spoon. Light the anisette and pop the entire concoction into the back of your throat.

      Then pray.

    402. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:51

      Only because Pine-Sol reminds them of better days.

      When the madam gave them thirty percent of the john’s fee.

    403. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:53

      Ouzo: life’s answer to the eternal question “what would liquid concentrated mule ass taste like?”

      I thought that was pear brandy?

      Ginger Brandy, extra sharp.

      But only if the mule was eating ghost chilis.

    404. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:53

      Only because Pine-Sol reminds them of better days.

      wev. Teh key part of pretending to listen is teh pretending. Er, I mean teh listening part. Definitely listening.

    405. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:56

      Oh, I suppose you all are elitist and prefer Sambucca.

    406. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:56

      mmmm, heated Sambucca poured over a coffee bean……

    407. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:57

      Oh, I suppose you all are elitist and prefer Sambucca.

      Only in a snifter.

      And only with the floating coffee beans. Three. Should be arabian. Kenyan in a pinch

    408. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:57

      I’m a big fan of flaming ouzo and sambuca shots. Firstly, you gotta get teh booze warmed up before it lights properly – then teh fire itself warms it even moar. Hot anise liquor – and no sipping or alchol burns to teh face for you. Awesome.

    409. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:57

      what the hell, let’s just get into an argument about tequila.

    410. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:57

      I’m wondering if the end-game of all this will look more like Snow Crash, Mariposa or Riddley Walker… Probably something completely different.

      I’m hoping for Mad Max. Does this hockey mask and crossbow make me look fat?

    411. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 21:59

      and no sipping or alchol burns to teh face for you. Awesome.

      that happened to missus zombie, except with tequila.

      Good life lesson: Don’t hesitate or your face gets burned off.

    412. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:00

      I’m wondering if the end-game of all this will look more like Snow Crash, Mariposa or Riddley Walker… Probably something completely different.

      Well, since health care is going down the tubes, I would guess the Rage virus is only a couple of years from getting loose.

    413. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:00

      Good life lesson: Don’t hesitate or your face gets burned off.

      In a zombie’s case, who’d notice?

    414. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:01

      I would give actor an AHEM, but he’s a big old honey badger and don’t give a shit.

    415. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:01

      Good life lesson: Don’t hesitate or your face gets burned off.

      It’s almost funneh how many different ways alcohol has taught me that very same lesson.

    416. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:02

      In a zombie’s case, who’d notice?

      Pshaaw. Zombies don’t hesitate. ACTORS hesitate, and call it ‘Method’.

    417. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:02

      I would give actor an AHEM, but he’s a big old honey badger and don’t give a shit.

      Hey, I specified THREE beans…

    418. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:03

      Pshaaw. Zombies don’t hesitate. ACTORS hesitate, and call it ‘Method’.

      What….do you….meanbythat?

    419. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:03

      Ouzo: life’s answer to the eternal question “what would liquid concentrated mule ass taste like?”

      I suppose everyone has their own answer to that eternal question, but my bote would go to MD 20/20′s Kiwi wine.

    420. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:05

      [whoring]

      My wife would love it if everybody I know votes for South Albany here

      [/whoring]

    421. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:07

      I’m wondering if the end-game of all this will look more like Snow Crash, Mariposa or Riddley Walker… Probably something completely different.

      I suspect it will look more like cold war eastern Europe. Everything is too expensive, there’s nothing on the shelves of the grocery store, too many people die from violence due to insufficient subservience. There’s no gas for vehicles, no fuel for heating, and the party elites live it up with too much of everything.

    422. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:07

      My wife would love it if everybody I know votes for South Albany here

      And on that day, not a shit was given.

    423. Major Kong said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:08

      Oh, I suppose you all are elitist and prefer Sambucca.

      Pastis, actually. Preferably Ricard. I’m a bit of a francophile.

    424. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:08

      Everything is too expensive, there’s nothing on the shelves of the grocery store, too many people die from violence due to insufficient subservience. There’s no gas for vehicles, no fuel for heating, and the party elites live it up with too much of everything.

      Some dude named Tripp wrote something similar…wish I could remember exactly what it was called…

    425. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:13

      And on that day, not a shit was given.

      Isn’t that every day?

    426. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:14

      Isn’t that every day?

      yea, but I voted anyway.

    427. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:17

      Only because Pine-Sol reminds them of better days.

      Pine-Sol remeinds me of Black Balzam. Nastiest stuff I have ever put in my mouth. Yes, even worse than whatever actor is thinking of.

    428. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:18

      Yes, even worse than whatever actor is thinking of.

      A Snickers bar???

      Sorry, someone just walked in with the traditional Halloween candy bag…

    429. kg said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:18

      +1 south albany

      +eleventy!!!111!!! for sambucca

    430. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:19

      Some dude named Tripp wrote something similar

      Sleepy Tripp, the midget car racer?

    431. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:21

      Sleepy Tripp, the midget car racer?

      No, another Tripp. Maybe it was one of Palin’s brood…

    432. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:22

      C. A. Tripp? I don’t recall that in either of his books.

    433. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:23

      Pine-Sol remeinds me of Black Balzam.

      That Bubba gentleman had some experience with a variety of balzam.

    434. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:23

      C. A. Tripp?

      No, no! You know, that guy! Tripp!

      I wish Spengler Dampniche was here. I bet he’d know. He knows everything.

    435. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:24

      That Bubba gentleman had some experience with a variety of balzam.

      Many people balls ‘em.

    436. Oregon Beer Snob said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:33

      I wish Spengler Dampniche was here. I bet he’d know. He knows everything.

      Is he here? Tripp, not Spengler.

    437. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:33

      BUT OMG CHECK THE WIKIPEDIA!

      fuck wikipedia…i love neccos…specially the black ones…

    438. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:38

      Don’t hesitate or your face gets burned off.

      someone’s getting this embroidered on a pillow for christmas!!!

    439. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:39

      Is he here?

      Not that Tripp! The other one!

    440. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:40

      i love neccos…specially the black ones…

      Negra neccos?

    441. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:43

      Not that Tripp! The other one!

      ya mean ben? and something something rising? or something?

    442. bbkf said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:44

      Negra neccos?

      wouldn’t that be negro, since neccos ends with o? i just saw my old spanish prof about an hour ago, too…too bad, i could have asked…either way, it’s fun to say…

    443. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:49

      ya mean ben? and something something rising? or something?

      Yea, that Tripp! Rising Tripp!

    444. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 22:50

      wouldn’t that be negro, since neccos ends with o?

      Because there are prying eyes on every move I make, every post I break….

    445. Steerpike said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:04

      Rising Dampniche

    446. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:06

      Tripping the Dampniche

    447. RWW said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:06

      Worst tasting liquor with the worst after effects: Armagnac. Beware friends, beware.

    448. Helmut Monotreme said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:17

      I once had a swig from a bottle of JATO* juice**. It was surprisingly smooth and drinkable.

      *Jet Assisted Take Off
      **JATO Juice: Moonshine distilled by the Air National Guard mechanics in Antarctica.

    449. M. Bouffant said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:30

      “Iran Epic Fail” trifecta now in play

      Also at CBS (Get it?) pics of D-K Wangchcuk’s wedding.

    450. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:30

      Plug nickelism.
      .

    451. actor212 said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:30

      Worst tasting liquor with the worst after effects: Armagnac.

      OK, quick lesson on sipping any straight liquor or brandy: take a breath. Sip the drink. BEFORE YOU SWALLOW, EXHALE THROUGH YOUR NOSE. Swallow.

      This makes Armagnac a surprisingly flavorful drink.

    452. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:32

      Worst tasting liquor with the worst after effects: Armagnac.

      It’s the next vodka! Who ever heard of Goose, before?
      .

    453. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:32

      Armagnac is wonderful stuff! RWW must stand in the corner.

      Asbach Uralt too, I likes dat shit.

    454. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:38

      NO one has figured out how to market Armagnac. The hip approach… fails.
      .

    455. vacuumslayer said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:38

      Geez, what a day to be crazy busy. I missed talk of sweets and drinkin’. Why don’t you add hot gay sex unicorns, make it a trifecta, and really break my heart.

      I’m guessing this comment will tagfail humorously.

    456. Pupienus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:40

      The hawt gay sex unicorns were at my placee.

    457. vacuumslayer said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:40

      Hot gay sex unicorns. Where the fuck is my strikethrough?

    458. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:44

      Where the fuck is my strikethrough?

      My fuckthrough has been on strike for a while, now.
      .

    459. tigris said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:50

      Hot gay sex unicorns. Where the fuck is my strikethrough?

      Which did you strike through? And WHY when the whole thing sounds awesomer than the sum of its parts*?

      *tee hee. HORNSY.

    460. Smut Clyde said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:54

      Worst tasting liquor with the worst after effects

      Chartreuse. Or so I hear from a friend.

    461. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:57

      On Strike!
      ~

    462. Vice-Admiral Beatty said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:58

      Chatfield, there seems to be something wrong with our bloody strikethrough today.

    463. Augustus said,

      October 13, 2011 at 23:59

      Quintilius Varus, give me back my strikethrough!

    464. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:00

      Chartreuse. Or so I hear from a friend.

      That’s someone who had “an incident” with the empty bottle. X-rays may have ensued.
      .

    465. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:04

      Tigris, I struckthrough the hot gay sex, but hot gay sex unicorns is something that should exist.

      Rule 34, your move.

      Thudner, how’d u doit?

    466. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:07

      May I suggest not drinking a fifth of Old Crow & following it w/ a shot of tequila.

      Per a friend who was much younger at the time.

    467. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:08

      That’s someone who had “an incident” with the empty bottle.
      The chartreuse victim is not sure if he would have noticed, what with so much pain in so many other parts of the body.

    468. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:15

      [strike]
      strike
      [/strike]

      He suggested.

      STRIKE!
      ~

    469. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:15

      Who would fuck up salt with licorice, anyway? Sick bastids.

      As for undrinkable liquor, can’t believe no one has mentioned Jagermeister. With the licorice too.

      And another thing…I’ve had it with that stupid “voted the best vodka of 2033.” O rly? Ok, fine, motherfucker…we’ll just let it age until 2033, because according to what you just said, nobody’s voting it “best vodka of NOW” which means it SUUUUUUCKS.

    470. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:19

      As for undrinkable liquor, can’t believe no one has mentioned Jagermeister.

      It tastes just like Vicks Formula 44 cough syrup. They may not even make that shit, anymore.
      .

    471. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:23

      Yeah. Licorice. I don’t get it.

    472. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:23

      Thanks, thudner!

    473. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:26

      Jagermeister. *sigh* Heinie and a Jager was my standard order at Zeno’s, back in the day. I don’t think I could keep a shot down these days.

    474. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:26

      nobody can see the super-secret neat thing I’m writing here!: POOP BALLS BOOBIES BUTT!!!

    475. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:27

      crap

    476. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:28

      As for undrinkable liquor, can’t believe no one has mentioned Jagermeister.

      OMG AGREED. Of course every amateur douche in UFC clothes has to do shots of Jaeger and insists that I do them too. I don’t DO shots, however, unless I’m trying to go to sleep. Jaeger is disgusting and so is black licorice.

      Black licorice is one of two things I cannot eat. The other is coconut. BLECHHH

    477. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:29

      vacuumslayer probably smells of BOOBIES

    478. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:30

      I saw that!

    479. Major Kong said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:31

      As for undrinkable liquor, can’t believe no one has mentioned Jagermeister.

      Tastes like Vics Formula 44 cough syrup.

    480. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:32

      Tastes like FAIL to me.

    481. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:32

      Must share. http://i.imgur.com/3hbfz.jpg

    482. Major Kong said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:33

      I got talked into doing shots of Jaeger at the Officer’s Club once when we were on a deployment.

      I recall crawling back to my room on my lips and it’s all a blank after that.

    483. Steerpike said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:35

      Jagermeister is made from surplus stocks of Vick’s Formula 44, apparently, fortified with formaldehyde, pig piss and cobra venom, if flavor and effect are anything to go by.

      I have some very fond, embarassing and mercifully vague memories of my last encounter with Jagermeister, about 16 years ago. Never again.

    484. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:35

      Thread getting very shopworn.

    485. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:36

      Black licorice is one of two things I cannot eat. The other is coconut. BLECHHH

      Coconut licorice sounds COOL.

    486. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:38

      Okie-doke, here is gawd angry again at Wash., D.C. (& VS, depending where she is now.)

      Possible Tornado Reported Near Epicenter of August Earthquake

    487. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:38

      Tastes like Vics Formula 44 cough syrup.

      U O Me MexiCoke.
      .

    488. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:39

      No coconut? Who in hell doesn’t like a Mounds bar?

    489. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:40

      PENIS BALLS.

    490. Steerpike said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:42

      I like black licorice (including black jellybeans, which means I get all of them every Easter–yum!) but my all time favorite candy of all time is those candied ginger slices you only find at Asian markets. Man I love that stuff! I pick up a bag or 2 every time I’m somewhere that sells it, and I know it’s completely safe to have lying around, because absolutely no one else in my family can stand it, including the dog, and he eats poop!

    491. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:44

      As I recall, any sort of name brand candy bar like Mounds was a welcome addition to my Halloween pumpkin basket.
      ~

    492. tigris said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:52

      Okie-doke, here is gawd angry again at Wash., D.C. (& VS, depending where she is now.)

      Possible Tornado Reported Near Epicenter of August Earthquake

      REPENT, Eric Cantor!

    493. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:52

      The mere whiff of coconut is enough to give me a chubby.
      .

    494. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:54

      Must’ve been those babes I hung out with every summer, bronzing with that Hawaiian Tropic shit.
      .

    495. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:54

      May I suggest not drinking a fifth of Old Crow & following it w/ a shot of tequila.

      I really don’t see why not.

    496. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:56

      Heinie and a Jager was my standard order at Zeno’s, back in the day.

      YOU. ARE. DEAD. TO. ME.

    497. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:57

      PENIS BALLS.

      LOL–I need a drink now.

    498. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 0:58

      REPENT, Eric Cantor!

      It’s because he’s gay.

    499. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:02

      ON (shopworn) topic:

      You never want your college roommate talking to the New York Times about you, even when you’re a used car salesman from Texas accused of conspiring with elements of the Iranian government to carry out terrorist attacks in the U.S.: “His socks would not match. He was always losing his keys and his cellphone. He was not capable of carrying out this plan.”

    500. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:04

      I really don’t see why not.

      I’d say projectile vomiting, but there wasn’t much solid in the spew. And esp. embarrassing at some one else’s kitchen table.

    501. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:07

      Update on Florida death penalty.

    502. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:10

      Update on Florida death penalty.

      Musical accompaniment.
      ~

    503. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:11

      Gawd, the devil put those thoughts of hot gay sex unicorns in my heayud!!

    504. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:15

      Update on Florida death penalty.

      Best way to avoid this is to repeal all gun laws now.

    505. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:20

      Gawd, the devil put those thoughts of hot gay sex unicorns in my heayud!!

      Aren’t you some kinda artist? Gotta work that shit out.

    506. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:21

      Nastier than Jagermeister. To be consumed with salty liquorice. Or not.

      Oh look, Liquorice liqueur! Is anyone surprised that it’s from Finland?

    507. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:25

      “Aren’t you some kinda artist? Gotta work that shit out.”

      Dear Diary,

      I got the strangest commission request today…

    508. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:29

      I’d say projectile vomiting, but there wasn’t much solid in the spew. And esp. embarrassing at some one else’s kitchen table.

      You effete bastard.

    509. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:48

      zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      YOU. ARE. DEAD. TO. ME.

      Is that a good thing?

    510. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:58

      Sign ideas for the (sadly small) Occupy Spokane march, please! Like The Perfect Cheer, I need The Perfect Sign.

    511. Anonymous said,

      October 14, 2011 at 1:59

      Mmmm salty licorice.

      Guh. I’m pretty certain that stuff is what asphalt tastes like.

    512. Anonymous said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:06

      More on candy (which I shouldn’t eat): I like regular black licorice quite well, just not the salted stuff. I like Neccos, even the “chocolate” ones. And I like those weird Mary Jane taffy-with-peanut-butter-inside things.

      I also like Chimes ginger peanut butter candy. Which reminds me, there’s a tin of it lying around somewhere…

    513. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:08

      LMFAO.

      The origin of the 999 plan.

    514. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:22

      The other is coconut. BLECHHH

      Son?

    515. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:23

      Oh look, Liquorice liqueur! Is anyone surprised that it’s from Finland?

      It’s what we sell to the rubes. We drink lingonberry liquor.

    516. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:24

      May I suggest not drinking a fifth of Old Crow & following it w/ a shot of tequila.

      I really don’t see why not.

      Because the fourth old crow gets mad and goes home.

    517. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:29

      tsam – go over to my joint and copy the guillotine illustration. That would make a good poster.

    518. RWW said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:30

      actor212 said:

      OK, quick lesson on sipping any straight liquor or brandy: take a breath. Sip the drink. BEFORE YOU SWALLOW, EXHALE THROUGH YOUR NOSE. Swallow.

      This makes Armagnac a surprisingly flavorful drink.

      ###
      Oh, I got the flavor of it, and it was fer shit. I’ll go stand in the corner and enjoy my Jaegermeister and other licorice flavored booze. I got no problem with them.

    519. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:31

      tsam – go over to my joint and copy the guillotine illustration. That would make a good poster.

      Think I should be sporting an indirect threat like that? I mean I LOVE it, but I’m usually the one everyone is telling to calm the fuck down.

    520. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:32

      I’ll just stick with my dark rum.

    521. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:43

      tsam – I like the pitchforks and flaming faggots torches. Thought about taking that down to OWS Portland.

    522. vacuumslayer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 2:58

      “I’ll just stick with my dark rum.”

      Ok, not BAD…but a tad esoteric. I don’t know if most people are going to get it, though.

    523. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:01

      …wait, VS hasn’t been banned?

    524. vacuumslayer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:06

      Por what?

    525. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:13

      Is it too late to talk about candy? My beau has gotten into ice cream making. He’s made a lemon sorbet and two vanilla ice creams—one with whipping cream and one with heavy cream. For the second batch of vanilla I made a caramel sauce, a fudge sauce, and busted a lot of nuts. We got a can of whipped cream and a jar of maraschino cherries. I made some really bitchin’ turtle sundaes.

      Next experiment will be my personal fave—coffee and heath bars. We have a Colombian blend and a bag of Heath (Halloween is just on time). Once we perfect that, I’m going to buy some toffee bars from See’s candy to make a drop dead delicious version of my favorite ice cream. Then we can experiment with different coffees and different toffees.

      I love dairy. I love ice cream. I love this man. I love him like the sun.

    526. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:23

      Yeah? Ok. So it’s between the pitchforks/torches and the guillotine.

      Any votes?

    527. Bitter Scribe said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:27

      Yeah? Ok. So it’s between the pitchforks/torches and the guillotine.

      The guillotine comes out a head.

    528. RWW said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:31

      tsam’s speciality is slitting troll throat. Just sayin’

    529. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:39

      Ok. Guillotine it is.

    530. Major Kong said,

      October 14, 2011 at 3:57

      The guillotine comes out a head.

      It was neck and neck there for a while.

    531. Pupienus said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:00

      Coffee is cream is wonderful. My favorite remains rich chocolate with toasted almonds. That shit gave me a coronary, it did. Well, it was partly responsible, at least.

    532. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:02

      Currently the best gelato in Vancouver:

      http://www.bellagelateria.com/

    533. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:12

      The guillotine comes out a head.
      It was neck and neck there for a while.

      A close shave.

    534. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:12

      Chin up, though!

    535. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:14

      This is really starting to feel more like home, here.
      .

    536. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:16

      Speaking of effete bastards, the best (& only) creamy rosewater ice cream in Los Angeles.

      And no, I’ve never et there, nor I do intend to. For one thing, no coffee I scream.

    537. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:18

      This is really starting to feel more like a home, here.

      Slight but necessary alteration.
      .

    538. paperbagmarlys said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:33

      Giant Lizard Attack!

      Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan is from Sim City? (What’s going to happen when Cain discovers post-8 bit graphics? A while back, he ended a debate by quoting from Pokemon 2000. I’m not looking forward to him playing, oh, Halo.)

      …When asked about similarities between Cain’s plan and SimCity’s default tax rates, Cain campaign spokesman JD Gordon replied, “Well, we all like 9-9-9.”…

      http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/13/herman-cain-999-sim-city_n_1008952.html

    539. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:45

      9-9-9 sounds more like some kinda pizza deal promotion to me. Like, 3 medium pizzas X 3 toppings each for $9.99.

      Only problem is, that leaves out the crazy bread. And with Herman Cain, you gotta leave room for the crazy.

    540. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:46

      Also, too: YAY! My monopoly banker guillotine graphic is gonna get seen by some people in meatspace!

    541. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:47

      ahem.

    542. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:50

      What’s meatspace?

    543. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:52

      999:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMlpqOsc2BU

    544. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:52

      From OWS’s Facebook page:

      We just want to remind everyone that Occupy Wall St. is for the 99%! Each and every one of you is included! Many people are concerned that this is becoming a strictly left-wing movement. That just is not true. Remember, this is not about pushing a specific political standpoint, it is about discussion between all of us. This is not an “us” vs. “them,” this is everyone working together to make life better.

      Nice.

    545. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:57

      I’ll see your classic punk and raise you later, harder punk

      Still Brits, though.

    546. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 4:59

      Their other best song.

    547. El Manquecito said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:02

      While chartreuse and galliano rate for awfulness I think the worst booze I’ve had (other than back alley Asian arracks) was a kind of Chinese gin flavored with little caper like perfume berries, maybe what they dry to make Sichuan peppercorns. Instagag. Of heroic awfulness.

      Liquorish and salty? I’m that most nights.

    548. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:30

      Worst liquor experience for me was Mescal and a worm. It may have killed every brain cell associated with remembering the experience, but I could not forget the aftermath. It was strictly beer, weed, and wine for this woman for the next twenty years. A few years ago I developed an interest in vodka and juices, but had to cut that out because it doesn’t mix well with morphine and oxycodone and grapefruit doesn’t mix well with Copaxone.

      I miss it a little.

      sniff

    549. Provider_UNE_BlackityBlackBarbarian™ShopwornNymChangingKillerOfThreads said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:37

      Whats meatspace?

      The real world as opposed to cyberspace.

      Also, too, an occasional fan of anisette based liquors, ( had a buudy growing up who was Greek and turned me on to ouzo. Also a fan of Necca wafers, (not surprisingly a strange bird as well), lover of Chartruese, and Laphroig.

      Can’t stand Cilantro (possibly missing interperative alleele) as it tastes like joy diswashing detergent, and I’d rather my food did not taste like soap.

      Have I shared too much.

      BTB the thread has been a great read…Thanks to all!

      ps. Tsam I am down with the guillotine.

      pps. regarding a previously read thread always too far back to lurk, I was 4 + a couple of months old when I saw Armstrong jump out of the Eagle…One of my first memories.

      .

    550. El Manquecito said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:41

      I took a couple of noobz to an opium den in Vientiane once and, comparing notes the next day I explained the alcohol/opiates problem. A Dutch friend, overhearing us said; “Ja, but chew get used to it.”

    551. jim said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:46

      Sorry, libtards – the pictures don’t lie:

      OCCUPY protestors = just a bunch of ignorant hippies!

      PS: an online commenter elsewhere claims that the famous picture of the guy who POOPed on the cop-car was actually of a protestor in Toronto back in circa 2005. Interested to know if anybody can either confirm or refute this.

    552. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 5:49

      999:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMlpqOsc2BU

      Ahem. Someone (cawn’t be arsed) already linked that, maybe last thread, & it wasn’t me; even though I used to go out w/ a dame whose husband “grew up” w/ those boys.

    553. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:05

      Mmmm. Smoked opium once in Germany (in an Air Force dorm on an Army post), and it felt so damned good that I knew as much as I’ve ever known anything that I would never. smoke it. again. Never.

    554. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:16

      Jim, great links. I loved the Limbaugh statement set against the background of a WWII veteran pushing his walker in a march. Bless his heart. I love that generation—so democratic, and pro-social. I used to love old people and I thought I just loved old people until “old people” suddenly meant bitter fundamentalists cranks who appreciate nothing and bitch about everything.

      At the Veteran’s Hospital and on the shuttle on the way up to it a WWII veteran is always appreciated by all and encouraged to tell stories. Boy, do they tell stories well! A generation that appreciated conversation and questions, and knew how to entertain itself.

    555. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:20

      My mom’s husband is a WWII veteran – Battle of the Bulge. He turned 90 in July. And he’s a staunch Democrat.

    556. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:23

      Ahem. Someone (cawn’t be arsed) already

      Dude, it’s not like I don’t already post the same thing as you three hours later. Accept that I am a slowpoke!

    557. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:30

      My grandma turned 95 this year and is also a staunch democrat.

      I used to work for some elderly ladies who had been working with each other and their husbands forming unions in textile mills in the South, Ford in Dallas, and were pioneers in head start. When I met them l all their husbands had died and they were working in the Gray Panthers—“GRRRR, on the prowl!”

      It’s hard to express how honored I feel to have known them and to have cleaned their houses, tended their yards, and often helped one get dressed for yet another dear old friend’s funeral. They were committed people and real friends.

    558. El Manquecito said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:33

      Still another hour before the bread is done and I can sleep. Stop me before I reminisce again.

    559. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:38

      O.K. Stop. But a better hypnotic suggestion would be positive—think only of the present or future. All is well. When the bread is done you can sleep.

    560. Anonymous said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:39

      Yeah? Ok. So it’s between the pitchforks/torches and the guillotine.

      Any votes?

      I think we’re forgetting a third option, very classical– just ask Marcus Licinius Crassus.

      Not to mention that there’s several orifices available to use…

    561. John Revolta said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:50

      So. Y’all have had some bad tasting booze, you think? Feh.

      God knows why, but my parents had a bottle of this stashed away under the bar.

      It is the nastiest stuff you could ever put in your mouth.

      It’s made, by God, out of artichokes.

    562. El Manquecito said,

      October 14, 2011 at 6:52

      Local organic spelt, house levain, it’s bread worth staying up for. I’ll cut you a slice wiley, choice of spreads, all ours; honey, peach or beach plum jam, pate (no diacritical marks on iPhone) but it’s fancy liver, of course there’s really good butter, just typing on the phone makes the hours melt away

    563. El Manquecito said,

      October 14, 2011 at 7:14

      Haven’t kilt a fred in a while but it seems easy.

    564. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 7:23

      Plum jam?! Plum jam?! I love plum jam. Can’t find any in this freakish town and it chaps my ass no end. Why haven’t I looked for some on-line and had it delivered to me (I ask myself this right now and have no answer but “do it”)? Love it on biscuits especially but it’s great on home-made toasted bread.

      I’d offer you some of this coffee heath bar ice cream, but it would melt. I just tasted the cream/coffee mixture before it went into the fridge to cool overnight and I was immediately reminded of the scene in “Pulp Fiction” where Uma Thermon ‘s character snorted a line of coke and exclaimed,
      Goddam! Goddam! Goddam!” I said it just like she did and it was quite sincere.

      Coffee—the drug I can’t do without.

    565. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 7:35

      to’ve = *BLAM!*
      .

    566. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 8:11

      Dude, it’s not like I don’t already post the same thing as you three hours later. Accept that I am a slowpoke!

      Pls. don’t call me “dude,” man.

      Anyway, it was mostly an excuse to name-drop at three or four degrees of separation. Oddly enough, no one was impressed.

    567. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 8:18

      Smoked opium once in Germany (in an Air Force dorm on an Army post), and it felt so damned good that I knew as much as I’ve ever known anything that I would never. smoke it. again. Never.

      Smoked opiated hash (An American soldier on leave shared some.) in Paris, & was barely able to walk home, where I slept for 13 hrs.

      However, it was Demerol (in a hospital after surgery) that convinced me to stay away from heroin if ever offered, however. Not that I needed that much persuasion not to become a junkie.

    568. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 9:06

      Yeah. I learned enough from being addicted to nicotine to know that I really didn’t need the indignity of being addicted to a street drug. Swore off chemicals in the eighties and so never bothered with any of the designer drugs. I had to have friends explain to me the behaviors of people on Quaaludes or Ecstasy—drugs wasn’t my first guess. I was completely thrown by the people at the deli who deliberated for half an hour and couldn’t make up their minds what to order and all the loving friends I never knew I had who were popping out of the woodwork at clubs.

      What was wrong about the Demerol? I’ve never been knocked out for surgery, though it’s been tried. I went home and slept for 14 hours after the surgery.

    569. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 9:26

      Now I am reminded I have a whole bunch of Tylenol with codeine around that I haven’t abused yet. What is my problem? I mean, if one of my livers fails I’ve got another, right?

    570. McGravitas' kidneys said,

      October 14, 2011 at 9:32

      Do you wanna tell him or should I?

    571. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 9:56

      No wonder Belial is grumpty if Substance is using him as an organ donor.

    572. wiley said,

      October 14, 2011 at 10:05

      I convinced my doc to switch from hydrocodone to oxycodone because it gave me the creeps. Tylenol never did anything for me anyway and those damage stats are based on some average liver, not mine. I’ve been a caregiver for a liver transplant candidate/recipient and don’t even want to risk going there. It’s a horrible way to live and die.

      If I get high on any this shit I haven’t noticed and like almost everyone I ever talked to who took morphine for pain, I hate it but not as much as I hate the pain.

      I take morphine, oxycodeine, and amitryptaline at night it and doesn’t even make me drowsy.

    573. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 10:08

      Nothing bad about the Demerol at all. Woke up from having a vein pulled from my leg (seven incisions, crotch to ankle) & not only felt no pain but was ecstatic. I felt so damn good I realized mere psychological addiction would be as bad as any physical addiction that might develop later.

      Just don’t drink while taking the Tylenol, kidneys.

    574. John Revolta said,

      October 14, 2011 at 10:40

      Yeah…………….a friend of mine was in the hospital dying of AIDS some years back. One of the last times I went to see him, he wasn’t able to talk, but he scrawled out a little note for me:

      DEMEROL IS GOD

    575. M. Bouffant said,

      October 14, 2011 at 10:44

      I am, of course, on a higher spiritual plane now, straight-edge except for the every two mos. or so binge of four or five brews at a time!!

    576. lobbey said,

      October 14, 2011 at 11:37

      Worst tasting liquor with the worst after effects: Armagnac. Beware friends, beware.

      Mr RWW, outside, now.

      (either that, or you have only ever drunk the cheap stuff)

    577. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 11:43

      Now I am reminded I have a whole bunch of Tylenol with codeine around that I haven’t abused yet.

      I’m waiting on a delivery of “333s” any day now. I’m running low on Ones.

    578. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 11:46

      PS: an online commenter elsewhere claims that the famous picture of the guy who POOPed on the cop-car was actually of a protestor in Toronto back in circa 2005.

      Quite Sadly, No

    579. lobbey said,

      October 14, 2011 at 11:55

      Ok, will let you off RWW, sounds like you have never tasted the good stuff. Brother got me a 1968 for my b’day last year, and its one of the smoothest drinks you can imagine.

      If you ever get the chance, try some of this little tipple. No mixers, no ice, straight up… fantastic. Am going to have to hide it from the wife, though!

      http://foursquarerum.com/

    580. Provider_UNE_BlackityBlackBarbarian™ShopwornNymChangingKillerOfThreads said,

      October 14, 2011 at 12:48

      Quite Sadly, No

      Picture of random dude’s asscheeks laid upon a police car is not proof of pooping on said vehicle. Nor is any proof offered of affiliation of Mr Butt-rub with the protest.

      Didn’t I read that Jimmy O’Keefe made an appearance at some point?
      .

    581. Smut Clyde said,

      October 14, 2011 at 12:57

      I take morphine, oxycodeine, and amitryptaline at night it and doesn’t even make me drowsy.
      I am informed that if you take a fortnight’s dosage of amitryptaline and wash it down with a fifth of Famous Grouse then you may well attempt to climb a bookshelf under the impression that it is a stairway to heaven, then shut yourself in your room and be unable to find the door to let yourself out again, then pass out for 48 hours. Or your heart goes into fibrillation and you die. Whichever comes first.

    582. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 13:25

      Didn’t I read that Jimmy O’Keefe made an appearance at some point?

      Followed by about four OWS protestors with cameras, recording his every step, yes.

    583. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 13:27

      Picture of random dude’s asscheeks laid upon a police car is not proof of pooping on said vehicle.

      This is one case where I will take the photographers word at face value for it. Still, it’s one protestor and who’s to say he wasn’t really sick that day and just found a convenient curb, which had the misfortune of being next to a cop car?

    584. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 14:59

      So a guy took a shit on a curb. That says precisely nothing about what is going on at OWS. I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise.

    585. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:02

      Occupy occupies LEAFS SUCK’s financial district starting tomorrow (yes it is very Canadian to wait until teh week-end so that our anti-corporate protests don’t interfere with teh work week). Teh sucky part is that teh financial district is on Sunday’s Waterfront Marathon route. While this is valid since LEAFS SUCK’s Waterfront Marathon is primarily sponsored by Scotiabank, teh sucky part is that this event brings a couple million in for local charities annually.

      In other LEAFS SUCK news – we are ever so much a precious and quaint little town. For context, Yonge and Dundas is pretty much smack downtown. Teh new open public space at teh south west corner of the intersection is supposed to be “LEAFS SUCK’s Times Square.” Note also that teh transit stoppage and total messing up of traffic started a few minutes before 5 PM.

    586. paperbagmarlys said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:06

      Dear Tsam,

      I am, ahem, so sorry.

      Also: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVl8vfev4L8.

      PBM

    587. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:17

      Tintin, Thers mentioned your name…
      ~

    588. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:30

      Ugh. South east corner. Teh south west corner is teh Eatons Centre.

    589. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:34

      pressie for zrm

    590. vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:37

      Oh, come on, tsam. It says everything. Now those teatards who gleefully screamed at the dude with Parkinsons? Naw, that’s totally cool, bra.

    591. N__B said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:42

      Talking to your bra is okay, but if it talks back you’re in trouble.

    592. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:51

      Tintin, Thers mentioned your name

      TinTin is Thers? I thought he was that Karl Ehmerson or what have you…

    593. bbkf said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:53

      i don’t have time to get totally caught up here, but i wanted to take the opportunity to say BACK OFF THE BLACK LICORICE U H8TERS!!! hating it proves that you are the real racists!

      also too….wiley you are the luckiest woman ever…i would even write a song for your man…it would go something like: kellykellykellykellykellykellykellykelly…kelly…kellykelllykellykellykelly..
      okay, so i ripped it off of a cheers epsiode…wevs…

    594. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:54

      BTW, the London Stock Exchange is scheduled (pronounced shed-jeweled) to be occupied this weekend

      And it looks like fighting’s broke out on Wall Street…I hope the food I just dropped off is OK.

    595. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:56

      Talking to your bra is okay, but if it talks back you’re in trouble.

      I’ve had boobies give me an earful about motorboating.

    596. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:01

      We are all Tintin.
      ~

    597. Steerpike said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:02

      Talking to someone else’s bra is also okay, as long as you maintain eye contact.

    598. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:18

      Talking to someone else’s bra is also okay, as long as you maintain eye contact.

      How YOU doin’?

      And you?

    599. tigris said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:32

      9-9-9 sounds more like some kinda pizza deal promotion to me.

      Sounds like a Smut date with a German lady.

    600. Steerpike said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:34

      I think it was Jon Stewart (can’t be arsed) who compared Rick Perry’s situation to being in a porno movie: suddenly, for no apparent reason, a pizza guy shows up and fucks you…

    601. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:37

      We are all Tintin.
      ~

      I am Tintacus!

    602. tsam said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:38

      Sounds like a Smut date with a German lady.

      LOL! I have to drop an FTW on that one.

    603. Arakasi said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:41

      Since mocking the tea party is always on topic here, I thought I’d share a flyer I got in the mail a couple of days ago.

      Here in Virginia, we are gearing up for a bunch of state elections next month. I got a flyer with the Republican candidate on it, that listed a couple of endorsements from the leadership of the Tea Party Express. I was about to throw it out when I noticed the small print “Paid for by the VA State Democratic Party”

      Apparently, the Dem’s numbers are showing that the tea party is toxic enough that their endorsement would hurt a candidate in the purple portions of Virginia

    604. TruculentandUnreliable said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:41

      Hydrocodone actually makes me speedy.

      Has anyone mentioned Jeppson’s Malort yet?

    605. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:41

      Sounds like a Smut date with a German lady.

      I think we should make “Nein! Nein! Nein!” an Internet tradition.

    606. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:43

      T&U!

      *swoon*

    607. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:44

      I am Tintacus!

      I AM TINTINNABULATION!

    608. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:45

      Jeppson’s Malort

      I don’t care which duck or who’s fucking it.

    609. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:49

      Why does FOX News hate America so?

    610. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 16:57

      Bloomberg backs off, and uses the back door.
      ~

    611. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:07

      Bloomberg backs off, and uses the back door

      Yes, but fighting has broken out this morning Scroll up.

    612. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:19

      From a comment on Wonkette:

      Friend of mine spent the day at Zucotti yesterday. Some of his observations:

      “Yesterday was clearly “hygiene day.” It seems that Mayor Bloomberg and the park’s owners (A Real Estate holding company) decided that the Park was dirty and had to be professionally cleaned. Total bullshit. The occupiers are cleaning the park continually. I almost died laughing when I saw this dreaded dude polishing a metal trash can with a spray bottle, scrub brush and towel. THIS ONE PARTICULAR CITY BLOCK IS CLEANER THAN ALMOST ANY OTHER CITY BLOCK IN TOWN.”
      “It would seem that if the mayor is concerned about health and hygiene issues down there he might send down a few port-o-cans. There are ZERO….NADA…ZILCH….anywhere. The protesters (and beer infused visitors like me) have to rely on the generosity of the neighborhood businesses. There is a McDonald’s close by that is getting quite a bit of use….me twice!. Other businesses have also opened their doors to the protesters and by first hand account these facilities are also being kept very clean. I’ve been in a lot worse bathrooms at rock shows.”

      The ‘clean the park’ excuse is just that.

      Or as I asked the other day, “You know who else got rid of problems via cleansing?”
      ~

    613. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:20

      Heh. I am like The Beatles up in here.

    614. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:26

      I am like The Beatles up in here.

      *clasping head*

      *SCREAMING*

      *faint in a puddle of wet panties*

    615. Steerpike said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:27

      T&U appears to be having a bad “spell”

    616. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:28

      The ‘clean the park’ excuse is just that.

      In fairness, I don’t think the protestors would mind what was originally proposed, which was a staged cleaning, where portions of the park would be cleared and cleaned, while people remained in the other parts. The talk around here was this was a doable arrangement for the OWS crowd.

    617. tigris said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:28

      I think we should make “Nein! Nein! Nein!” an Internet tradition.

      Party of Nein!

    618. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:28

      I almost died laughing when I saw this dreaded dude polishing a metal trash can with a spray bottle, scrub brush and towel.

      Yeah, that’s pretty fucking awesome.

    619. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:33

      Party of Nein!

      *GASP*

      I….I….can I have your baby?

    620. tigris said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:35

      Friend of mine spent the day at Zucotti yesterday. Some of his observations:

      First hand observation vs UK Daily Mail link above describing “filth” (though most of the pictures of the “filth” are either stuff piled neatly around full garbage cans, just like the pictures used to prove how clean the saintly teabaggers were, or are piles of rolled sleeping bags etc, i.e. NOT TRASH) Hmm, who to believe, who to believe…

    621. tigris said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:36

      I….I….can I have your baby?

      Sure, I’m not going to finish it.

    622. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:37

      Hmm, who to believe, who to believe…

      Oh, well, clearly the Daily Mail…

    623. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:38

      Sure, I’m not going to finish it.

      Ooh! Toes……

    624. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:46

      Ooh! Toes……

      I find those to be better braised, personally.

    625. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:46

      I find those to be better braised, personally.

      Share? There’s ten of them.

    626. Dragon-King Wangchuck said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:49

      Interesting observation. Even babbies lurve teh taste of babby toes.

    627. TrucuelentandUnreliable said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:53

      Share? There’s ten of them.

      Pass the dippin sauce.

    628. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:54

      I’m with whoever it was upthread who doesn’t buy that picture of a dood “pooping” on a squad car. Alls I can see is some guy mooning a police car, and since I can’t see the plates or the city markings on the car, I can’t even be sure it’s an NYPD car. Whoever originally posted this as an example of the protestors being dirty and ill-behaved should have taken the time to photoshop in a turd if they wanted us to believe it is what they say it is. I mean, does anyone really believe that if somene shit on a squad car that the NYPD wouldn’t be out there making a huge stink (heh) about it? There’s been nary a peep from NYPD, which tells me there’s no poop-smeared cruiser.

      Mooning a police car is rude, to be sure, but hardly unhygienic, and overall much more civil than spraying penned, unarmed protestors who aren’t resisting anything with pepper spray..

    629. Substance McGravitas said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:54

      PEDOPEDOPHILES.

    630. Jennifer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:55

      Oh my, I never expected the toe-sucking to spread to over here. I thought it was quarantined over at my place.

    631. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:57

      I thought it was quarantined over at my place.

      You’re my new best friend.

    632. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 17:59

      Alls I can see is some guy mooning a police car, and since I can’t see the plates or the city markings on the car, I can’t even be sure it’s an NYPD car.

      It’s a police car. It’s been checked with the precinct listed in the photo (61st, in Brooklyn I think).

    633. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:00

      Even babbies lurve teh taste of babby toes.

      My mom used to tell me I couldn’t stop sucking my own toes.

      I didn’t have the heart to tell her I was aiming a little higher.

    634. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:04

      I didn’t have the heart to tell her I was aiming a little higher.

      Actor’s a knee sucker!!!

    635. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:06

      Actor’s a knee sucker!!!

      Bury my hard at Wounded Knee.

    636. Jeffraham Prestonian said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:15

      SHOPWORN!
      .

    637. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:29

      SHOPWORN!

      Nothing is more shopworn than saying something is shopworn.

      Side note – The entire Notre Dame football team just walked by. It was Notre Dame College out of Ohio though, they are in town to play college football powerhouse Ave Maria University. Fortunately I have to work tomorrow and can’t go.

    638. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:30

      college football powerhouse Ave Maria University

      Bet they rely a lot on Hail mary passes.

    639. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:31

      SHOPWORN!

      Nothing is more shopworn than saying something is shopworn.

      SHOPWORN!

    640. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:35

      Bet they rely a lot on Hail mary passes.

      The school was founded by the Dominoes Pizza guy, so their whole football strategy is to try to deliver to the end zone in thirty minutes or less.

    641. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:38

      Wow.

      Leave it to a couple of Indians to “get” OWS.

    642. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:39

      so their whole football strategy is to try to deliver to the end zone in thirty minutes or less.

      So they’re good for only two touchdowns a game? What happens in between quarters when they have to turn the car around?

    643. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 18:53

      So they’re good for only two touchdowns a game? What happens in between quarters when they have to turn the car around?

      Hey, I didn’t say it was a good strategy. So far they are only averaging one touchdown per game.

    644. Thread Bear said,

      October 14, 2011 at 19:07

      Back to politics: I just got caught up on last nights Rachel Maddow show. Apparently the Republicans are extremely adament that no fetus should be denied the opportunity to join the ranks of the unemployed.

    645. Tintin said,

      October 14, 2011 at 19:12

      New thread just posted

    646. vacuumslayer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 19:31

      *swoon*

      I don’t think I’ve ever elicited a swoon from a dude. Is it too much to ask all you guys to carry around a fainting couch on your backs? I mean COME ON.

    647. vacuumslayer said,

      October 14, 2011 at 19:32

      And after my dumb super-awesome joke?

    648. jim said,

      October 14, 2011 at 20:11

      Bury my hard at Wounded Knee.

      You stole this from me whan I was nine, didn’t you?
      DIDN’T YOU?!!?!?!

    649. actor212 said,

      October 14, 2011 at 20:16

      Is it too much to ask all you guys to carry around a fainting couch on your backs?

      OHNO! I’ve been on casting couches before…”Sure, honey, you’ll need to faint, so you just put this on your back and…”

    650. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

      October 14, 2011 at 21:42

      vacuumslayer probably smells of spoiled milk said,

      October 14, 2011 at 15:34 (kill)

      pressie for zrm

      why the hell are you leaving it here?

      Did I start another blog last night while I was drunk?

    651. Master Bator said,

      October 15, 2011 at 21:24

      It’s called “empire of the blotto.”

      IT. IS. AWESOME.

    652. elderneEldern said,

      November 10, 2011 at 22:40

      Hi! i’m Re-twit you post: to my @abroujbq twitter

    653. seabsPype said,

      January 10, 2012 at 21:57

      sovon google jjvhu

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