Let’s Push Robin of Berkeley Over The Top!
America’s Dumbest Homosexual™ — B. Daniel Blatt — has trotted out again his annual, and oddly-named, Grande Conservative Blogress Diva contest. And, no, a “Grande Conservative Blogress Diva” is not a new pumpkin spice mocha drink at Starbucks. It’s a contest in which readers — that means you, SadlyNauts! — get to select as the winner of the, er, coveted title “a strong woman who commands the respect of gay male conservatives.” Dan oddly adds that the Grande Conservative Blogress Diva need “not be conservative herself,” although all of the available candidates are pretty much so far right that they have all, at one time or another, accused Concerned Women for America of being a lesbian Bolshevik front group.
Really, the list is like a Sadly, No! hit parade of our favorite wingnutresses (to follow Dan’s odd — and ogress-inspired — feminization coinage). There is Pam Meister, who once lamented that hate crime laws were passed to honor a fag rather than those poor Duke lacrosse players who were the real victims of hate. And Elizabeth Scalia, the pathetic nun impostress who once said that condoms, not bankers, were the cause of the latest global economic crisis. Of course, the list also includes Professoress Winebox who thought that Obama put bombs on planes to help the Democrats last November. Not to mention the Middle-Aged White Woman From North Carolina Who Pretends Be A Hip, African American Blogress Named Sistah Toldjah. And the InstaCrackeress, who once hatched a plot to leave snarky notes to waitpersons instead of tips if Obama was elected and has been dining on Snothchos ever since. Also, a personal fave Sassy Cassy Fiano is on the list.
But, of course, there is a relative newcomer on the list who is sitting in second place in the voting and needs a nudge over the top. It’s American Thinkeress Robin of Berkeley. Crazy Robin has provided hours of amusement here and, most recently, over at World O’Crap. Robin was recently featured here in I See Rude People: Robin Of Berkeley Edition and her touching Thanksgiving tribute where she reminded us that the best way to give thanks for your own blessings is to forget completely about the impoverished uninsured layabouts who were at fault for only having an untreated case cancer to give thanks for on that holiday.
The awesome power that is Sadly, No! has been brought to bear previously on the Mucho Grande Wingnut Blogress Fabulous Diva and Girlfriend contest with great success and party hats and fairy dust for everyone! So, let’s do it againand assure that Robin is pushed over the top by a wild pack of Bolshevik commie-loving gay abortionists and their enablers.
It’s not easy to vote for Robin of Berzerkley over all those other worthies.
But I must march in the order that our Leftist Overlords dictate. So shall it be done.
~
I want a fairy dust bunny. Hyphenated either way.
Ogress vottage thus far.
~
Crap, the local DPW done plowed in the lot, and the company plowing contractor hasn’t shown up- at least my manager says, “Hey relax, you’re getting paid!”
Immagonna wait until I know who Thers is picking.
Sister…….Toldjah?!
I had to get out of the boat because I found that hard to believe. I have no idea why.
Who the fuck is Clarice Feldman?
Who the fuck is Clarice Feldman?
The protagonist of “Silence of the Trafe.”
With the goo goo googely eyes?
The protagonist of “Silence of the Trafe.”
Clarice, do you still hear the pigs screaming?
If I were to redo that quip, I’d write:
Clarice, do you still hear the lobsters whistle as they’re thrown in the pot?
I almost feel bad for Coulter, being all washed up and forgotten, even by a never-was like GayPatriot. Then I remember she is a hateful, hateful person who deserves to live in the Galtian dystopia she helped create.
Now I can’t stop picturing Jodie Foster entreating Anthony Hopkins to call her Eye-gor.
I almost feel bad for Coulter, being all washed up and forgotten, even by a never-was like GayPatriot.
Wasn’t she on some Fox show within the last couple of weeks? As despicable as she is, she’s totally out of “Gay Patriot’s” league.
Leave Unca Donald Alone!!
Wasn’t she on some Fox show within the last couple of weeks?
Dear Cthulhu Below, I have no idea. Are there still shows about Tailgunner Joe and Clinton’s Penis?
Possibly of use. Robin of Berkeley has my ongoing support.
http://www.azproxies.com/
Well it’s about fucking time! I’ve been keeping my powder dry* for at least a week, waiting for instructions. Off to do my duty!
*if that’s a VsomethingR I can’t imagine what the something would be.
Are there still shows about Tailgunner Joe and Clinton’s Penis?
They slapped a wig on Clinton’s Penis and it co-hosts “Fox and Friends”.
That dumb poll won’t even let me vote twice … which means that it hates America & wants Al-Quaeda to win.
I had to get out of the boat because I found that hard to believe. I have no idea why.
SHIT JUST GOT UNREAL.
Left the boat to check the poll, and found this hilarious little tarantula lurking among the spoiled mangoes:
Now, you want a Diva…what about Pam Gellar?? Man, what a Diva, but at least she’s fighting Sharia creep, probably at risk of her life (Robin of Berkeley can’t even come out of the closet…Conservatively speaking). I would think fighting Islam and Sharia in the U.S would be something you guys would be mighty interested in, considering you’d be first on their hanging list.
Yeah, Pammycakes may burst a blood vessel!
I’ve been keeping my powder dry* for at least a week….
*if that’s a VsomethingR I can’t imagine what the something would be.
Two words: talcum, testicles.
http://www.azproxies.com/
SMcG, what are you trying to tell us?
Did Timmy fall down the well?
Also: http://www.torproject.org/projects/torbrowser.html.en
Is there a miner trapped at the bottom of the mine and he’s broken his leg and needs insulin?
Are the neighbor’s chickens close enough to our yard that we can shoot ’em and call trespassing?
~
ARF! ARF! CLARICE FELDMAN HAS SUPERIOR TECHNOLOGY! ARF!
facepalm,jpg
I apologize to the poll for my cruel & unfounded accusations in the previous comment, & would like to take it out for dinner, a movie & a walk on the beach to make up for it. I obviously was wrong to call it dumb … it may even be one of the greatest minds of our time.
probably at risk of her life
There’s a Pam who lives a life of danger,
Jills off while reading Camus’ Stranger
She wants those Arabs dead,
The veins bulge in her head.
Odds are she won’t live under sharia.
Arab hatin’ Pam
Arab hatin’ Pam
Mooslims took your Coat Factory
And left you with a mosque.
Fuck her technology – RELEASE THE
KRAKENSHOGGOTHS!C’mon guys. Brave Soeur Robin is only 27 votes behind (and doubling up on Beast Malkin in 3rd place).
But wait! What about the queen of the shitmoat?
But wait! What about the queen of the shitmoat?
She’s left in the dust, along with Jennifer Rubin:
Are you really overlooking Jennifer Rubin, formerly of Commentary, now of the Washington Post? How? She is without peer — high volume coupled with intellectually acute analysis.
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/right-turn/
Comment by Judith — December 24, 2010 @ 3:56 pm – December 24, 2010
I looked low and lower annd still couldn’t find where to vote for Lindsey Graham.
Robyn, girl…you know had to vote for you…because, girl, you BRING IT!
I wanna get all up in those Mom jeans when you sit on that arm chair and unleash that crazy hot psychobabble…
When I read about your liberal days ( which I totally believe, girl) it makes me feel like you poured warm honey on my crotch…
And let loose a thousand fire ants
Awwwwwww yeeeeeeeeeah
Girl, my Robyn, my Lady…
You’ll always have my vote
UNH
Gay Conservative
Black Republican
Oxymoronic.
I still think Peggy Fignoonan should get a Lifetime Achievment in Redundancy Award.
Oh my!
I’m not positive that Robin will necessarily be inconsolable if she wins.
Tintin, you spelled “Over A Cliff” wrong.
I’ll have what she’s having.
“I looked low and lower and still couldn’t find where to vote for Lindsey Graham.”
That’s because Lindsey doesn’t “command the respect of gay male conservatives.”
Honorable mention to Orly Taitz?
(turkeyday linky kaput)
Clarice Feldman seems to have been radicalized by the collapse of the coal mining industry. Because nothing says America First! like digging up rotted ferns from ~400 million years ago.
Clarice Feldman seems to have been radicalized by the collapse of the coal mining industry. Because nothing says America First! like digging up rotted ferns from ~400 million years ago.
She thinks that, if we don’t sacrifice miners, the sun will burn out.
Grande Diva Sir Robin is only nine votes behind!
Honorable mention to Orly Taitz?
She may be a one-trick pony* but she’s fucking that chicken hard, which gets points in my book:
Richard Hung in a blond wig is penciled in to play Orly.
*She gets bonus points for having a name that conveniently self-mocks.
Lindsey voted against the 9/11 GI bill. He’s a snake who uses his military service to avoid having a real life. “I ain’t available.” I wonder if she took the gays-in-the-shower, I mean DADT survey that was sent to servicemembers?
Dark horse (ahem) Princess Sparkle Pony?
Taitz said that she was now trying to turn the Lakin story into a musical, and is appealing for Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
Oh please let this happen.
I wonder if she took the gays-in-the-shower, I mean DADT survey that was sent to servicemembers?
Soitenly, she probably voted to not rush the decision so she could study the hard evidence longer. Or vice-a-versa.
Taitz said that she was now trying to turn the Lakin story into a musical, and is appealing for Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
Now, if she got the producers of the Spiderman musical on board, THAT would be interesting!
OT, but…BACON!!!
Can bacon ever be off topic?
Taitz said that she was now trying to turn the Lakin story into a musical, and is appealing for Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
I don’t think “Pride & Prejudice: The Musical” would work as a name.
Taitz said that she was now trying to turn the Lakin story into a musical, and is appealing for Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
AWESOME.
I’ll take “Ways to make ALW even worse” for 1000, Alex.
I am very excited it appears as though my vote has helped inch Robin ahead by a mere two votes at this point. It is almost like the Minn. senate thing.
Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
Oh yeah! “Birther Express!” With lasers, and rollerskates, and disco and shiny stuff and other shiny stuff!
Oh yeah! “Birther Express!” With lasers, and rollerskates, and disco and shiny stuff and other shiny stuff!
Can haz Donny and Marie?
~
Andrew Lloyd Webber to contact her.
“The Phantom of the Vault”. Practically writes itself.
If the rumors of Coulter being a …um,ah… outie instead of a..uhh… innie are true, then prehaps that’s why h….. that name’s not there.
OT, I want to share a freebie – NPRmusic has “Our favorite 12 songs of 2010” free download from iTunes.
http://www.npr.org/2010/12/23/131333323/download-the-best-new-music-of-2010?sc=nl&cc=mn-20101221
Those with eclectic tastes in music might enjoy:
Now, if she got the producers of the Spiderman musical on board, THAT would be interesting!
Didn’t Bono and The Edge write the music? I can see them writing a song for ORLY?
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill MeHotter, Hornier, Wetter, Tighter
Robin pulls ahead.
Can haz Donny and Marie?
Heck yeah, great Idea for a one night only!
“Tonight, for one night only, at the Salt Lake City Ampithoreum Theatre..
Andrew LLoyd Webbers “Birther Express” with very special guest stars Donnie and Marie Osmond as Barack and Michelle Obama!!!!”
I’m surprised Gayp Atriot didn’t have a Very Special Mention for SARAH!
“a strong woman who commands the respect of gay male conservatives.”
GP seems to be looking for a dominatrix (if not a Donna Matrix). Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Not that I take direction from the powers that be at Sadly, No! because that would make them liable for any number of sins I’ve committed…COINCIDENTALLY…at places like Amazon and Date.com, but Robin now has an eight vote lead.
Robin pulls ahead.
From Robyn of Berserkely’s blog:
Teehee.
Teehee.
BEHOLD THE POWER OF BEZERKLEY!
Tintin, I’m assuming you’ve already prepared *the* email?
the powers that be at Sadly, No!
The dial-up connection hamsters?
As per instructions received on this website, which presumably gets them ultimately from George Soros (the beneficent, the merciful) I have bought my copy of Rise Again. Now, for step 2, I must learn to read.
77south, I just finished it this morning. You shan’t be disappointed.
As to the proxy thing, I may lose all my Internet Tough Guy Cred here but even after clearing history (Mozilla-style) and going through different proxies, I have been prevented from voting more than about four times. I haz a sad.
Iz da cookeez.
The dial-up connection hamsters?
I, for one, love our Cricetinaec overlords…
You misspelled Snotchos.
Don’t fuck with a registered trademark of Frito-Lay, Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of PepsiCo.
Don’t fuck with a registered trademark of Frito-Lay, Inc.
I prefer women anyway.
Springtime For Birthers
You misspelled Snotchos.
Get on the bus Eugene, actor is into Crotchos.
With Nathan Lane or Zero Mostel?
Get on the bus Eugene, actor is into Crotchos.
I do like the fish tacos.
I’ve cast my Monday vote in obedience to the Fuhrer Directive of our Most Secret Islamo-Stalinist Gay-Agenda Cabal.
Brave Robin has acquired fully 25% of the votes cast, and has a 16 vote lead. Our Evil Plot is working! Do your duty for Our Most Excellent Masters!
Birther of La Mancha
Iz not kookiez. Dems cleared wif histry.
Iz IP Add. Use McG.’s kind proxy suggestion, or
What’s the point of that, doesn’t seem very democratic. Oh, he he, traffic in this wk. of limbo. Silly me.
enoughschool.com worked for me, ‘though metrolink.info didn’t.
Robin is up by 21 votes, 1%! Go team!
Did you see the winner’s and runner-up’s prizes? Will Robin’s ‘Ethel’ tiara be made out out tinfoil?
The last 50 miles of our trips home is always excruciating. The traffic accordians and stops FOR NO REASON. I feel like I’m never going to geT home.
Whatever you do, don’t think about HOW BAD YOU HAVE TO PEE!
Don’t think about the stopping, the bumps, the never ending traffic.
bleh. proxies, cookies, cache, nuttin works and now I can’t even get to the vote page. fuxit. I’m goin’ skiing.
VS, hope you geT home quickly.
This is why I like to travel dehydrated
The runner-ups–it’s not clear how many–get an ‘Agness’ tiara. Then they are burned as witches. Great television for the awards ceremony!
Thanks, WC. we’re about 15 miles out and moving now.
Yeah, I know: Should have typed ‘runners-up’. So sue me.
My child the raisin.
VS, I hope you didn’t hit any of der bad wever I’ve seen on the news. Sceery.
Luckily, we didn’t!
Dear lord…one more fucking exit….everything goes at a crawl. I’m feeling killy.
Rex Ryan brings a whole new meaning to football.
Leak! the musical
Oooo-ooo, speaking of fetishes, Vacuum Pron! Be still my imagination!
Other voting: TBogg is up for some bullshit from Sullivan. Let’s push him over the top!
Plus which: Looks like you can vote all you want at the Dish.
Exford: I like Leak! the musical! I would love to see you continue for the whole libretto! I could imagine the music, imagine the set. I would purchase tickets for it. (Said seriously. And I would pay good money for good seats.) So here’s a blurb for the adverts: “Wicked, clever, sly, and FUN!”
Thanks, Snidely. Totes have to get Bill Maher to play Julian Assange
voting is fun and funny
Exford, I’m kind of getting a Greek tragedy feel to it, with different choruses. Home & condom tho?
More like GEEK TRAGEDY! Amirite? Three acts separated by two Statler and Waldorf type critics in viking helmets telling jokes like ‘Spilled your coffee? That’s rape in Sweden! Sent a letter without a stamp? That’s rape in Sweden!’
Currently considering ending second act with Julian’s (Rum Tum Tugger) lamentation a la ‘Swedish wimmenz are nowt but flying monkeys sent by the Wicked Witch of the West CIA
Also, Sofia Wilen’s character has an ‘I’m just a girl who can’t say no’ tune.
Also, Randy Nweman gets a gig
Well I hope you are all real happy now! Robiness of Berkleyess is in the lead. This is why wingnutesses can’t have nice thingess.
Most tone deaf comment at Paid Gayrat
Most unintentionally self-referential comment:
Go Robin Go!!!!
I think dinner tonight is hash, in honor of her Berkeleyness.
She’s up by 59.
I’m still mad at those cheatin’ cheaters for Clarice Feldman.
By the way, not hearing a dinner bell!
Yeesh. Remove the ummmm, ‘material’ from your ears.
In comments:
A gracious note from one of the strong contend—
Awwww.
Warner Todd Huston is late to the party. Nice to see the Brimleystache back again.
The fact is, I support anyone who will give all the faggots special rights back to real Americans.
Some of the responses to “Mitch” and his criticism of RofB’s panic when an alleged lesbian allegedly looked at her, in an allegedly lascivious way – they’re all, “damn straight I’d be upset at a same-sex somebody checking me out: O the horror!” Perhaps this means that the next time some man looks at my tits (and why wouldn’t he – they are lovely) I’d be justified in smashing him over the head with a shovel. No, no, no, wait. Hetero ogling is normal, and my proper response is to pretend not to notice while blushing winsomely.
Poor RofB. She’ll haul off and slug some poor woman, who will later testify at RofB’s trial: “I was just about to say to the defendant, ‘Ooh, cute shoes! Where’d you get them?’ and then BAM, she hits me!'” Luckily RofB is a highly trained psychologist with potentially huge future earnings which she can start paying the plaintiff when the civil suit settles.
I voted. Where’s my cookie?
Exford: Mahar would be a perfect casting choice. There’s a seperated-at-birth resemblence. But can Bill sing? (Ahh, doesn’t matter: Robert Preston couldn’t sing much and he killed in ‘Music Man’.)
I voted. Where’s my cookie?
Somewhere in your machine somewhere? I don’t really understand how they work.
Robyn, girl…you know had to vote for you…because, girl, you BRING IT!
I wanna get all up in those Mom jeans when you sit on that arm chair and unleash that crazy hot psychobabble…
When I read about your liberal days ( which I totally believe, girl) it makes me feel like you poured warm honey on my crotch…
And let loose a thousand fire ants
Awwwwwww yeeeeeeeeeah
Girl, my Robyn, my Lady…
You’ll always have my vote
UNH
Dang, slayer. You really bring it, too.
Mein schaden ist freuded:
Mein schaden ist freuded
A little ointment, some green tea, maybe a primal scream is all you need for that.
I am reminded of a little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants.
Yeah, I went and pulled the lever* for Robyn of Bedlam. What a load of simpleton skank bitches over there. Not a decent fag-hag amongst ’em.
VS, you should be pissing at about 15 to 20 minute intervals by now. Hang yer ass out the window and let it rip! Relieves your stress and entertains the other trapped motorists.
* VPR, of course!
PM: Gracias for the NPR iTunes freebies link … I dont really know what I’m getting (surprise!), but it’s downloading now
Robin is winning!
Just to get you in the mood, here’s a medley of paranoid Robin of Berkeley babblings from one of her recent outbursts:
radical Islam and drug dealers invading our borders… people who hate us start moving down the block… the ranks of adversaries increase every day… our youth are brainwashed to despise this country… I lay in bed disturbed, thinking of these people who want to harm me… evil does exist… the enemy comes cloaked in elaborate disguises
Mmmm. Can you feel the crazy?
Just voted, and Robin is still in the lead! With our help, she can go on to be the Pam Geller of 2011!
MEDIC!
Dammit, why do I always have to walk point here?
radical Islam and drug dealers invading our borders
people who hate us start moving down the block
the ranks of adversaries increase every day
our youth are brainwashed to despise this country
♫ These are a few of my favourite things. ♪
Link fail as usual, but the ‘toob carnage ain’t close to over yet.
As for ROB, I’m surprised that nobody’s mentioned Roy-Ed’s effort on the same date as the World O’ Crap effort cited above. (Preemptive link fail)
Burkas and headscarfs and kneeling to Allah,
Threat’ning the Christians and those who make challah,
Scowling brown strangers ensconced in their ‘burbs,
These are the things that get ‘murkins disturbed…
Clyde: Sounds like you have the clay for a musical of your own…
I’m bailing for the VA Medical Center ER. A 24-hour on-call VA RN advised me to do so. No pain, nothing life-threatening; possibly an umbilical hernia.
I’m apprehensive–I’ve never had surgery, if it proves to be UH–but my sense of humor is intact: I’ll look forward to reading SN! when I get back. Have fun, all!
You, too, Bull. Nice lyrics! Try another verse?
Hope it’s nothing serious, Snidely. Don’t let them nurses get near your moustache with them shaver thingies.
Army strong. (or whatev)
When the bomb bursts,
When the sword thrusts,
When I’m feeling “meh”…
I simply remember my Jihadic things,
And then it’s a bright… new day!
Don’t let them nurses get near your moustache with them shaver thingies.
If it’s a hernia (& I hope it isn’t & all is well) his mustache is going to be far from where the shaving’s going on!
possibly an umbilical hernia
DON’T MAKE SNIDELY LAUGH.
Sounds like you have the clay for a musical of your own…
Sticking to clerihews in the previous thread.
You know what’s another of my favourite things?
DKW’s mum.
I was going to write song lyrics along that theme, but with the rhyme scheme pointing to the involvement of either ‘thumb’ or ‘bum’, Mr Taste soon left the building.
the enemy comes cloaked in elaborate disguises
That’s why they call them “Decepticons”, dear.
I’m okay. It is a mild umbilical hernia, but won’t need surgery. The VA is going to fit me with a back brace. (No back problems fortunately; rather, the front strap will contain further expansion.) I’m relieved.
—————–
Let me tell you, government health care works–and works well. I’ve always had quality care at the Baltimore VA Hospital. The same quality of care should be available for everyone: I’m a firm believer in single payer. Whatever the other many defects and evils of the Health ‘Insurance’ vultures, their ‘business model’ is morally repugnant. ((End of editorial.))
I’ve been up all night; heading off for some rack time.
Suezboo & MB: Thanks….
And Bull and Clyde, too!
“Dang, slayer. You really bring it, too.”
Athankee,Snidely!
BTW, after I murdered several people on 95, I came home to a house with NO HEAT. Im sitting here with like 87 layers of clothing on under a fur blankie.
Clearly everyone has frozen solid and I am the sole survivor of the Sadly commentariat. I thought it would be more fun to be the king.
And Robin surges into the lead…
I came home to a house with NO HEAT. Im sitting here with like 87 layers of clothing
That’s the perfect time to reread Mr. Popper’s Penguins.
Somebody say something fucking funny.
I’m moving, some douche stole my debit card number and charged a bunch of WoW shit to it, and I have a “review” tomorrow that will, at best, be unpleasant. Also, I have a headache, too.
So, the funny, bitches. Bring it.
“That’s the perfect time to reread Mr. Popper’s Penguins.”
I think I need to read something about glorious big blazing fires.
“Somebody say something fucking funny.
I’m moving, some douche stole my debit card number and charged a bunch of WoW shit to it,”
Ugh. That happened to my paypal card number. Some guy was gambling online with it.
Funny…POO!!
On the upside, my heater does work…
Ladies of S,N, I got yer funny right HERE
If none of you respond soOn ill just assume you’ve killed yourselves because Doug is off the market.
Oh, I’ve explored the depths of the Men’s Rights movement, and this isn’t an uncommon sentiment amongst these assholes.
Sexism and racism. Like motherfucking peanut butter and jelly.
Also, my lips are chapped. Too.
When I was a kid, there was a guy who paraded up and down Fifth Avenue, mostly in the 40s and 50s (the touristy part in midtown) wearing a sandwich board and large buttons on the portions of clothing left uncovered by the sandwich board (including a top hat). The topic of the board and the buttons? Husbands’ Lib. He would preach as he walked, encouraging men to rise up against their “pantied, aproned oppressors.” One time as my father and I were walking by he said “I’m not against women: I think every man should own one.”
Moral 1: The more things stay the same, the more things stay the same.
Moral 2: If you don’t want your kids to hear you cursing, don’t walk them past assholes.
Also, my lips are chapped.
A family goes on a driving vacation across the west. Two weeks in, they’re at the Grand Canyon. The mother is resting by the car when her youngest comes running over, yelling “Mommy, Mommy…Daddy fell in.” The mother says “You know you shouldn’t make me laugh when my lips are chapped.”
I’m pretty sure there’s going to be a toddler walking around here soon saying “fuck fuck fuck.” Someone around here curses like a sailor. *cough*
I’m pretty sure there’s going to be a toddler walking around here soon saying “fuck fuck fuck.” Someone around here curses like a sailor. *cough*
Yeah, if I ever have kids, I think the best that I’m going to be able to do is tell them not to repeat what I said in public. Not that it will help.
Morning lulz for T&U…
Look what DKW found: Great video…or greatest video?
The first one kills me. Kills me.
Exactly. I’ll have to give that a try.
Perhaps this means that the next time some man looks at my tits (and why wouldn’t he – they are lovely)
I am truly interested and would like to subscribe to any newsletter than features your lovely breasts, plus any websites that mayhaps depicts them.
I think I need to read something about glorious big blazing fires.
I have JUST the etching…
Im sitting here with like 87 layers of clothing on under a fur blankie.
Sounds like my last date. Only she did it for self-preservation.
I have a feeling this will not make me hot…so much as horrified.
A leading indicator that sweet hot lovemaking down by the fire will not be forth,um,coming.
I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?
Um, Doug does realize that the odds are reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally high she’s cheating on him with a better model American Male?
I have a feeling this will not make me hot…so much as horrified.
Adrenaline raises body heat.
When I was a kid, there was a guy who paraded up and down Fifth Avenue, mostly in the 40s and 50s (the touristy part in midtown) wearing a sandwich board and large buttons on the portions of clothing left uncovered by the sandwich board (including a top hat).
I remember him. He extended his career by preaching loudly on the west side subways about “the Irish”.
His name was O’Shaugnessy, as I recall.
Doug doesn’t know much, besides he’s busy cleaning Cheetos dust off his orange-stained penis down in his mom’s basement.
Someone around here curses like a sailor. *cough*
That’s what you get turning tricks dockside.
he’s busy cleaning Cheetos dust off his orange-stained penis down in his mom’s basement.
Things have to be tough when Mom dumps you for another man.
Doug doesn’t know much, besides he’s busy cleaning Cheetos dust off his orange-stained penis down in his mom’s basement
One does this before logging on to Chatroulette!
Strange women don’t want to watch me play with my orange penis. I HATE AMERICAN WOMEN!!!
Ugh. That happened to my paypal card number. Some guy was gambling online with it.
Sigh.
Morning lulz for T&U…
Aw, I don’t have audio at work. Perhaps I will bookmark it, libs.
Teh Buttsecks?
Sadly, No!
What exactly is a Thers anyway? I was under the impression it was police slang for one of those guys whole crawls into the tank under womens bathrooms at rest stops so they can look up. “Hnn-hnn, Thers her butt, hnn-hnn.”
who
The really power behind Julian Assange’s persecution over WikiLeaks?
He’s about to expose The Einherjar
I guess Sarah Palin types with her tongue.
What exactly is a Thers anyway?
Short for Thersides.
What exactly is a Thers anyway?
Google is nice and easy to befriend.
I guess Sarah Palin types with her tongue.
Forked, no less.
Google is nice and easy to befriend.
You oughta see what it will do for five bucks, in fact.
If none of you respond soOn ill just assume you’ve killed yourselves because Doug is off the market.
I suspect American Women boycotted him first.
Why can’t she just say, “Whoops, I mis-spoke! Looks like I coined a new word! HAHAHAHAHAH!” like a normal person?
She’s so dumb she doesn’t even realize that it’s smarter to admit to saying dumb things sometimes than it is to pretend that you never said them.
Easter’s around the corner.
You oughta see what it will do for five bucks, in fact.
Will it do more or less than DKW’s mom?
Fat Zombie Jesus is my new band name.
She’s so dumb she doesn’t even realize that it’s smarter to admit to saying dumb things sometimes than it is to pretend that you never said them.
Because that would mean she makes mistakes.
Easter’s around the corner.
In fairness to Zombie Jesus, we eat his body every week in church.
Will it do more or less than DKW’s mom?
The ending is slightly less happy, if you don’t like to be Googled after.
“I suspect American Women boycotted him first.”
You think your hot shit just because your flesh is fAlling off but women still prefer you to me. SHUT UP, ZOMBIE!
I think Dougie needs a time out with Raptor Jesus.
Y’know, I tend to agree with Doug in one respect: I tend to be attracted to furren wimmin, because American women have much too much authoritay and power over me.
I prefer my women the way I like my coffee: hot, weak and bitter.
because American women have much too much authoritay and power over me.
Oooo-oo-oo, now you’re talking my language!
Oh her spurs, they jingle-jangle-jingle
What be this google? Something new?
I wonder if you Google Google if it would be like when you hold a mirror to a mirror? On and on forever.
The perfect buggy for the VS Zombie Baby Shower gift.
Doug.
Googling “Google”
I prefer to Yahoo Google.
Yahoo hoo?
PENIS (legs crossing edition)
A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.
I might actually know this Doug, or at least there is a local whose misogynist rants sound very much like the Doug at Boycott American woman.
I will have to ask the dude if he has a blog, next time our paths cross.
I will try not to snort whatever it is that I happen to be drinking out of my nose if the cad answers in the affirmative.
Okay, so this zombie shambles into a bar. The bartender looks at him, does that pantomime-gun finger pointing thing, and says “hey, we’ve got a drink named for you!” The zombie bites the bartender’s face and just starts chewing. It’s absolutely horrifying, the bartender’s screaming, there’s blood everywhere. Outside there are hundreds of other zombies and people are fleeing in terror and panic, the roads are blocked with abandoned and overturned cars, some on fire. Few, if any, will survive the day.
Anyway, turns out the zombie’s name is Tom Collins!
PENIS (legs crossing edition)
I remember a story from years ago (80’s) about a guy in a machine shop who decided to experiment with a belt sander – the results weren’t pretty. I tried looking for it but if you google “penis belt sander scrotum”, you realize that there are number of practical applications for genital belt sander combinations then one would think (hair removal being one)
I’m actually the one who suggested Pam Meister (as a joke).