Hey, I was wandering around the Internetz this morning when I saw our good friend
Amy Arnold Alkon out digging one of his famous shit moats. So I decided to pay a visit to our favorite Los Angeles transvestite and see what’s cooking in the advice goddess business.
First, Arnold was upset about a story he read that said McDonald’s wasn’t really one of the best food options for kids. “Not so!” Arnold insists.
[I]t’s entirely possible to eat healthily at McDonald’s. … Since carbohydrates cause the insulin secretion that puts on fat … , you just order, say, the bacon-cheese Angus burger without the bun.
That way children can get each of the four essential food groups — salt, beef fat, cheese and pork fat – in one nutritious meal and grow up to be just as smart and healthy as Arnold.
Arnold also has recently penned an article in Psychology Today (under his nom de drag Amy, of course). The article is called “The Truth About Beauty,” a must-read if ever there was one considering that Arnold’s ideal of feminine beauty appears to be Lipsynka, an L.A.-based novelty performer who apparently provides Arnold with most of his ideas on wardrobe, accessories and haute coiffure. Well, not surprisingly, the point of Arnold’s article is that beauty is not on the inside at all but exclusively on the outside and that if women want to get laid they’d better concentrate on their Pilates and restrict their diets to those fat-burning bunless burgers at McDonald’s. Plus they need to buy more fetching clothes. (Yes, folks, you just watched the death of irony before your very eyes.)
Arnold’s column elicited a negative reaction at Jezebel which, apparently, really got his dander up. Not content merely to dismiss his critics as hairy-legged lesbianatical Amazons, as Arnold did here, Arnold went on to say, in a second post, that the Lezebels used comment moderation to, gasp, block a comment favorable to Arnold. Arnold, of course, would never ban unfavorable comments from his site.
And speaking of people writing about things they know nothing about, here’s a link to a post by Mr. Play-Doh and Bacon about feminine hygiene and cunnilingus. Srsly. It’s as if Jim Hoft suddenly wrote a post on narrative strategies and the phenomenology of memory in Proust.