GOP Pledges Allegiance To the Fags (Not)

gay_patriot_blatt_watermelon

ABOVE: Dan Blatt and boyfriend


It should come as no surprise that Dan Blatt, America’s Dumbest Homosexual™ would fall in line behind GOP’s New “Pledge to America” regardless of what it said about Teh Gays. Even if it called for mass execution of homosexuals, our buddy Dan would be endorsing it saying that some gays probably really did need to go and that he was himself ready to make the personal sacrifice of putting his own head on the chopping block as long as it would result in tax cuts for the rich.

Well, somewhat surprisingly, the GOP “Pledge” stopped short of gay genocide but, not surprisingly, dog-whistled the bible-thumping base that the GOP stood firm against homonuptials. So let’s watch Dan twist himself up into a pretzel as he tries to say that what the GOP said in this regard was, in fact, good for the gays and was, according to his alliterative title, a “particularly pleasant pledge.”

I also took note of one interesting juxtaposition:

We pledge to advance policies that promote greater liberty, wider opportunity, a robust defense, and national economic prosperity.

We pledge to honor families, traditional marriage, life, and the private and faith-based organizations that form the core of our American values.

I like the first line, love it, in fact. Love the focus on liberty. And while I wish Republican leaders had left marriage out of their “pledge”*, the language of the second line is particularly anodyne, as if they had spent hours hashing over it so they could throw a bone to social conservatives and say something which most people agree with.

Note, the operative verb here is “honor.” And who doesn’t want to honor traditional marriages? (A gay marriage advocate, if he really valued the institution he seeks to promote, would honor traditional marriages. Note what the document doesn’t say, it doesn’t say let’s dishonor nontraditional ones nor (unless I missed it) nor does it say anything about same-sex marriage, though that will be implied to said social conservatives

This is not far from a pig defending a recipe for a club sandwich by arguing that there is nothing that said the bacon couldn’t be omitted or replaced by turkey bacon or, even, by a few tasty salted corrugated cardboard strips. Or a cow looking at an abattoir and thinking that there is no reason it might not be a day spa for cattle. Only someone who has been buried beneath the surface of Mars for the past 20 years doesn’t understand that the GOP honors “traditional” marriage by fighting gay marriage.

I’m beginning to think that calling Dan America’s Dumbest Homosexual™ may be too kind.

 

Comments: 409

 
 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

“I’m beginning to think that calling Dan America’s Dumbest Homosexual™ may be too kind.”

Does “quisling asshole” work?

Has a slightly dirty ring to it, too.

 
 

Shorter Gaytriot: There’s no way this GOP pledge can be racist, because it doesn’t use the word “faggot” even once!

 
 

Er, homophobic. >_>

 
 

But assholes are relatively quiet, hard working and unquestionably necessary. Totally unlike Dan.

 
 

or, even, by a few tasty salted corrugated cardboard strips

Remind me never to allow Tintin to fix lunch for me.

 
 

A gay marriage advocate, if he really valued the institution he seeks to promote, would honor traditional marriages

No, a gay marriage advocate would simply honor marriage, and seek to make it available to all. Only gay-bashers draw distinctions between “traditional” marriages and the other kinds.

 
 

Remind me never to allow Tintin to fix lunch for me.
Says mister ‘I’m too cool for dietary fiber’

 
 

Note what the document doesn’t say, it doesn’t say let’s dishonor nontraditional ones nor (unless I missed it) nor does it say anything about same-sex marriage, though that will be implied to said social conservatives …

The hell?

WTF does he think they mean by “traditional marriage”, anyway? Has he missed the last few years in which it’s become GOP shorthand for “the fagnitzes shall not marry”? Is he really this stupid/short-sighted?

 
 

The Pledge is so idiotic that even Irky Irksome is irked by it, but here comes¹ Ol’ Dubmass….

¹VER

 
 

Well, at least this clears Democrats of the accusation, so beloved of Republicans, that we were once the party of the KKK. The old Democratic Party didn’t pass resolutions condemning the Klan, but it didn’t condone it, either. Amirite?

 
 

B. Dan may be stupid, it is debatable. That he is delusional can’t be argued.

BTW, didja see that the Log Cabiners gave an award to Jon (Zero LGBT rating) Cornyn yesterday? No, really, they did. Right after he helped kill DADT repeal.

The Log Cabin Republicans on Wednesday honored Cornyn, chair of the National Republican Senatorial Committee, as well as Rep. Pete Sessions of Texas, the chairman of the National Republican Congressional Committee, with the Barry Goldwater Award. The award, according to the group, “recognizes leaders in the Republican Party who have served their nation with distinction in the model of the late Senator Barry Goldwater.

Yes, like Barry, who famously said:

You don’t need to be straight to fight and die for your country. You just need to shoot straight.</blockquote

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Yes, like Barry, who famously said:

You don’t need to be straight to fight and die for your country. You just need to shoot straight

But, but society has changed so much since then and SHUT UP!!

 
 

We pledge to advance policies that promote greater liberty…

…but only if you’re white, straight, hail from the middle-class and above, and worship Jesus. Liberty for the rest of you? Tough titty.

 
 

or, even, by a few tasty salted corrugated cardboard strips

Remind me never to allow Tintin to fix lunch for me.

He’s Jewish, remember? It’s called matzoh

 
 

Goldwater, who also was repulsed by the religious right nutjobs who took over the Republican(tm) brand and crapped all over it.

 
 

What’s so exciting about all this is this ‘pledge’ moves the Overton Window creakingly to the right yet another few notches — Democrats will now be playing defense as if this screed was the new normal. And when they get their asses handed to them in November, fried and diced, on a bed of tasty cardboard strips, this insane document may very well become the new normal.

 
 

It’s not that I’m not familiar with self loathing…but this guy takeS it to a whole new level

 
 

“I think every good Christian ought to kick Falwell right in the ass.”
– Barry Goldwater

Say what you want about the guy…

 
 

Goldwater, who also was repulsed by the religious right nutjobs who took over the Republican(tm) brand and crapped all over it.

The Overton Wind…oh never mind, it’s so fucking obvious. Barry Fucking Goldwater would be a pariah in today’s GOP. A RINO.

Oy.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

The Overton Wind…oh never mind, it’s so fucking obvious. Barry Fucking Goldwater would be a pariah in today’s GOP. A RINO.

Or a Democrat.

 
 

I said this at the end of the last thread…and then you all ran away!(sob):

Looks like Dems aren’t going to vote on tax cuts at all. I can’t wait for the next fundraising call I get. “Money? What would you need that for? You’ve already figured out how to lose without my money. Besides, I’ll need that cash when the Republicans take over again and run the economy even further into the ground.”

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Looks like Dems aren’t going to vote on tax cuts at all

I give up.

 
 

Or a liberal Democrat.

That hurts even worse, ya know?

 
 

First they came for the homosexuals, and I said sure, why not? See you.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

That hurts even worse, ya know?

Yes. Yes it does.

 
 

The Overton Wind…oh never mind, it’s so fucking obvious. Barry Fucking Goldwater would be a pariah in today’s GOP. A RINO.

As would Reagan.

Actually, Reagan was hated as “too liberal” by quite a few righties while in power, especially towards the end when he made nice with Gorbachev even though they knew it was all, as some admiral once said, a trap.

Except they rewrote history to make him a saint because let’s face it, he was pretty effective electorally, and they need an icon to inspire them. I mean, what other president are they going to gather around? Bush? Bush padre? Nixon? *snerk* Eisenhower?

 
 

Dan Blatt is some kind of creepy gay Sonderkommando who seems perfectly happy to lead his “people” to the ovens.

He’s not just America’s Dumbest Homosexual. he’s also just a really rotten piece of shit human being in general.

 
 

I found this quote while doing a little research on narcissism. Apt for Dan(and a vast majority of wingnutz), methinks.

“Fearful people are more dependent, more easily manipulated and controlled, more susceptible to deceptively simple, strong, tough measures and hard-line postures. … They may accept and even welcome repression if it promises to relieve their insecurities.”

 
 

So let’s watch Dan twist himself up into a pretzel

That is SO three threads ago.

 
 

Oh shit.

 
 

the italics! they come for us all!

 
 

Tag phail.

But there it is, to me anyway.

FEAR.

And there is a lot of that on the ground right now, mostly (I think) due to a huge swath of the population feeling economic insecurity.

 
 

“Fearful people are more dependent, more easily manipulated and controlled, more susceptible to deceptively simple, strong, tough measures and hard-line postures. … They may accept and even welcome repression if it promises to relieve their insecurities.”

Those who give up a little liberty for security deserve neither.

And fuck! This is a brand new thread and it’s fucked up already?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Dammit, Mat!

 
 

Oops! I did that

 
 

as if they had spent hours hashing over it so they could throw a bone to social conservatives and say something which most people agree with […] though that will be implied to said social conservatives

Buh? This guy thinks that social conservatives are the ones who are getting snowed here?

 
 

Oh thank God, it was somebody else’s fault.

 
 

“And there is a lot of that on the ground right now, mostly (I think) due to a huge swath of the population feeling economic insecurity.”

And that’s understandable, but for the life of me, I can’t imagine that during The Great Depression Americans rose to the bait and bit so hard on fearmongering.

That was Germany between wars, not us.

 
 

OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE!!!

 
 

I wonder what happens if you do that with the blockquote.

 
 
 
 

Holy shit, I omit one little /i and all hell brreaks loose. Ooopsie.

 
 

Mat, no one’s blaming you. People screw up tags all the time and nothing happens. There’s some weird random glitch in the system

 
 

Geee, thanks, Subby…

 
 

OK, so that didn’t work.

 
 

“And that’s understandable, but for the life of me, I can’t imagine that during The Great Depression Americans rose to the bait and bit so hard on fearmongering.”

You still had socialist and Communists running around in the open back then, publishing newspapers and what not. Besides, who was there to get mad at? The Germans had their own problems, Americans didn’t give a rat’s ass about Europe since the Great War, and there was nobody else to raise paranoia over.

 
 

Blockquote does nothing but a code fail might actually improve matters.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Does this mean that we are now all just personalities in Substance’s demented mind?

I don’t like it.

 
 

The gerbils are drunk!

 
 

That was Germany between wars, not us.

Um, yes, yes it was.
History, she do have a habit of repeating herself from time to time. Hoping this is not one of them (or this particular one of them).

*crosses fingers*

 
 

Well, we might as well make everything bold while we’re at it!!

 
 

And that’s understandable, but for the life of me, I can’t imagine that during The Great Depression Americans rose to the bait and bit so hard on fearmongering.

That was Germany between wars, not us.

Frankly, I think the only difference between us and Germany is that 1) FDR wanted to save democracy, not destroy it and 2) he had the charisma, public popularity and BALLS to make sure democracy was saved.

Someone told him, “If you fail, you’ll be remembered as the worst president in history.” “If I fail,” he replied, “I’ll be the last one.”

And he was right.

 
 

Just when you think it can’t get even more fscked up…

 
 

They all called me crazy, but I always knew one day the Italics would take over.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Mah eyes hurt.

 
 

Oh. Blockquote does fail catastrophically in Not Firefox.

Enjoy!

 
 

You still had socialist and Communists running around in the open back then, publishing newspapers and what not.

There’s that too… there was genuine populism back then, and the Great Depression brought it so far out in the open that FDR was actually able to pose as a middle choice between the inefficient old guard and the crazy radicals.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Oh. Blockquote does fail catastrophically in Not Firefox.

Okay, phew. Switched to Firefox.

 
 

They all called me crazy, but I always knew one day the Italics would take over.

They sent a Courier, too, it seems

 
 

Oh. Blockquote does fail catastrophically in Not Firefox.

Eh?

I’m using IE, no problems here…

 
 

Yeah Subs, just checked in Chrome and OUCH.

 
 

I only checked Safari. Betcha Opera does well.

 
 

Note what the document doesn’t say, it doesn’t say let’s dishonor nontraditional ones nor (unless I missed it) nor does it say anything about same-sex marriage, though that will be implied to said social conservatives …

It doesn’t say that. He’s right.

Here, you gays get into this railcar. We’re having an award ceremony for you…

 
 

And some awful person could blockquote things off to the right of the viewable page. Trolls take note!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

So, they’re installing three large flat-screen TVs here in the hallways for……um……..I’m not sure, actually.

 
 

And that’s understandable, but for the life of me, I can’t imagine that during The Great Depression Americans rose to the bait and bit so hard on fearmongering.

America has had seven (7) historic negative economic events (incredibly deep recession/depressions) in its history.

This is the first time — the very first time — millions of Americans have decided to not only go without punishing those responsible, but actually rewarding them—whether though favorable tax policies, fighting increased regulations, or voting them back into office.

I’ve joked for years that our nation is getting stupider. Thanks to the likes of Dan the Self-Hating Homo and the Tea Tardaloons, I now have actual proof of it …

**hangs head, sulks away depressed**

 
 

So, they’re installing three large flat-screen TVs here in the hallways for……um……..I’m not sure, actually.

Follow the cables to the locker room and you’ll find the cameras.

 
 

So, they’re installing three large flat-screen TVs here in the hallways for……um……..I’m not sure, actually.

Fox News, Fox Business, and Fox News.

 
 

greater liberty, wider opportunity, a robust defense, and national economic prosperity.

Sadly, a “robust” defense (Shoveling money at war profiteers who will return as much as they can in campaign donations & reactionary think tank funding.) pretty much precludes nat’l. economic prosperity. (Is there “non-economic” prosperity?)

And that ol’ nat’l. security state we need for robust defense is hardly conducive to liberty. Civil liberty, that is. When Blatt types “liberty,” he of course means economic license. Which makes “opportunity” redundant. Especially when the new opportunities are mostly in the sewing uniforms for minimum wage & funeral business. Unless you can be a contractor.

In all fairness, B-Dan should probably be called America’s Denyingest (Out) Homosexual&trade.

Face it, Hoft has retired the America’s Dumbest Dude (Any Orientation) ™ crown.

 
 

wtf? over.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Fox News, Fox Business, and Fox News.

I like tsam’s idea better.

 
 

FIXED! YAY TINTIN (OR WHOMEVER)!

 
 

I’ve joked for years that our nation is getting stupider. Thanks to the likes of Dan the Self-Hating Homo and the Tea Tardaloons, I now have actual proof of it …

Democracy was nice while it lasted.

 
 

Ahem. Closing tags have the slash at the beginning not the end
< /i> NOT <i />

Also putting a closing tag in the next comment doesn’t work; it has to be in the same comment, which means I have to fix the problem

This is why you people can never have nice things.

 
 

Democracy was nice while it lasted.

100 years or so, actually.

 
 

We’ve just translated the “Pledge to America”!

It’s a COOKBOOK!!!!

 
 

Democracy was nice while it lasted.

It would have been, if not for all the elections.

 
 

Oh< lawdy lawdy lawdy, Ahmadinejad turns out to be a 9/11 Truther and the US walks out on his speech.

Just further proof we need to bomb Iran!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

This is why you people can never have nice things.

Hey, it’s your code’s fault, too!

 
 

Take comfort in one thing, folks.

No matter how hard conservatives have tried to stand athwart history, shouting “Stop!”, history eventually steamrolls them.

Progress happens. Progressivism happens. It may be infuriatingly slow…it is…but it happens.

We will win in the end.

 
 

This is why you people can never have nice things.

Oh thank god. I thought it was all those fires. Like its my fault nice things are so often flammable.

 
 

Sadly, a “robust” defense (Shoveling money at war profiteers who will return as much as they can in campaign donations & reactionary think tank funding.) pretty much precludes nat’l. economic prosperity. (Is there “non-economic” prosperity?)

I have to laugh (black humor) at the apparently true story of an Air Force guy calling his superiors on the morning of 9/11 to ask whether attacks on American soil were part of the military’s purview.

What the fuck do you think “Department of Defense” means, dumbass?

 
 

This is why you people can never have nice things.

You saying my things aren’t nice?

 
 

I can’t imagine that during The Great Depression Americans rose to the bait and bit so hard on fearmongering.

That was Germany between wars, not us.

It can happen here.

It’s a nest of vandals in here. Have all you d00dz [sic] tagged your bedrooms?

Not that I necessarily dislike the new font.

 
 

Ahem. Closing tags have the slash at the beginning not the end
NOT

Y’know, *some* WordPress-based blogs have little clickythingies that will autoformat your HTML for you…

 
 

New Pledge furniture polish makes watermelon insertion easier than ever!

 
 

No matter how hard conservatives have tried to stand athwart history, shouting “Stop!”, history eventually steamrolls them.

Not necessarily.

Roman Republic > Roman Empire > Dark Ages. Yeah, eventually we had the Rennaissance and the Enlightenment, but we’re talking over a THOUSAND years.

 
 

You saying my things aren’t nice?

Show us your tits things.

Or thongs. Those will be fine too.

 
 

“Progress happens. Progressivism happens. It may be infuriatingly slow…it is…but it happens.

We will win in the end.”

I choose to believe this.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

actor212 said,
September 23, 2010 at 22:45

I hate you.

 
 

Aw fuck. How the hell? I know I put my tags in correctly!

 
 

Progress happens. Progressivism happens. It may be infuriatingly slow…it is…but it happens.

Its the damage done in the mean time thats the problem… we got some serious shit that may not wait 20 more years.

 
 

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!

 
 

You’ll all bow to me now.

 
 

So, they’re installing three large flat-screen TVs here in the hallways for……um……..I’m not sure, actually.

In T&U’s prison, the telly watches you.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!

I love how the tag fails make the normally mild-mannered Chris completely apoplectic.

 
 

“Its the damage done in the mean time thats the problem… we got some serious shit that may not wait 20 more years.”

Yea. That’s the fly in the ointment.

 
 

Closing tags have the slash at the beginning not the end
NOT

Empty tags have the slash at the end.

YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!

Look, it’s nice that you look out for your mom’s interests, but there’s a list and she can put her name on and wait like the rest.

 
 

Whenever I go some place with a tv it almost unfailingly tuned to Fux. It makes me so angry.

 
 

I love how the tag fails make the normally mild-mannered Chris completely apoplectic.

It’s the little things. Electronic malfunctions give me Tourette’s.

 
 

We have nukes but cannot close html tags.

Let that bake at 350° for 20 – 25 minutes or until your underwear turn brown.

 
 

Tags for empty elements, I mean.

 
 

Look, it’s nice that you look out for your mom’s interests, but there’s a list and she can put her name on and wait like the rest.

Going to be a long wait… I thought DKW’s mom had everyone booked.

 
 

It’s the little things. Electronic malfunctions give me Tourette’s

They make me furious too. It’s a fucking bug, WP. Fix it bitchez.

 
 

Neither nice things nor many posts.

Tintin is holding the fort by himself, & he has to take time to clean up the messes you little savages make, instead of creating. You’re just hurting yourselves!!

 
 

“Its the damage done in the mean time thats the problem… we got some serious shit that may not wait 20 more years.”

Yea. That’s the fly in the ointment.

At this point, knowing that Obama’s been sold as “The Ultimate Liberal President,” and his failing centrist policies as “The Ultimate Liberal Policies,” I’d say reform’s going to be even harder in the future. The public’s trust in the left will definitely have taken a big hit from the last two years.

The only hope is that the teabaggers act crazily enough to actually drive the American people back away from them. Though frankly, if they right now aren’t crazy enough for the American people, I don’t know what is.

 
 

So I’m confused… if there is no vote on the tax cuts, doesn’t that mean all of those Bush tax cuts reach their sunset and evaporate? Did they already vote to extend all of them? WTF is going on?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Meh. Whatever.

Global warming’s going to get us all anyway.

 
 

Ah, thanks mate!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

YAAAAAAAAY THANK YOU TINTIN!

 
 

“if there is no vote on the tax cuts, doesn’t that mean all of those Bush tax cuts reach their sunset and evaporate?”

It means the Dems will bring the issue up after the election, is all. The Bush tax cuts would sunset on 1/1/11, I think, but the dems wanted tax cuts for the middle class and the Republicans promised a filibuster unless the Bush cuts were extended.

 
 

until your underwear turn brown

Until?

 
 

*whew*

(mental note: no tags for me)

 
 

Chris, dude. You are depressing me. And I’m already in a shitty mood. Quick. Somebody do something funny.

 
 

Somebody do something funny.

*unzip*

Oh. You said funNY….

 
 

*clutches hands to chest and makes “yer my hero!” eyes at Tintin*

 
 

“*unzip*

Oh. You said funNY….”

Yeah. Funny, not puny.

 
 

We will win in the end.

I believe this as well. But I do worry about what we are going to have to go through to get there.

Given that this is a consumer society, and that a vast amount of what we buy is actually made in China, mebbe the Chinese could step in and say:

“Lissen up assholes! Start taking care of your middle class so they have enough money to buy our crap or we’re going to begin making calls on all of your debt obligations that we hold.”

I, for one, would welcome our Chinese overlords.

 
 

Yeah. Funny, not puny.

/:-|

 
 

Chris, dude. You are depressing me. And I’m already in a shitty mood. Quick. Somebody do something funny.

Good depression relief for non-Polish people;

http://polishjoke.com/polish_joke-index.htm

 
 

I, for one, would welcome our Chinese overlords.

And I love what they did with checkers!

 
 

I, for one, would welcome our Chinese overlords.

Personally, I think the West’s obsession with capitalism is playing right into their hands now that they’ve learned to play the game, but maybe that’s just me.

 
 

Its hard to argue with company cities with hundreds of thousands of workers living in dorms. Our best capitalists could only dream of that shit.

 
Turbine Yukon Palin
 

Leaving aside his typical, delusional-to-the-point-of-offensive Aunt Tom-isms, this

I like the first line, love it, in fact. Love the focus on liberty.

What “focus,” dude? They did the equivalent of writing the word “Liberty” on a piece of paper and put that under a lamp and saying that this, somehow, promotes liberty, and then patted themselves on the back, congratulating each other for their part in increasing net liberty in the world.

It’s called “pablum” and do you know why they do this?

as if they had spent hours hashing over it so they could . . . say something which most people agree with.

Amazing! You do!

“Truth, justice, freedom, reasonably priced love, and a hard-boiled egg!”

 
 

Yeah. Funny, not puny.

YOU GOT SERVED!

 
 

Sarah Palin is on the front page of MSN.com (something about Bristol and “Dancing with Myself The Stars”) and they refer to her as “mamma grizzly”.

‘Cause, you know, grizzlys are known for not only being batshite insane but quitting things halfway through.

 
 

Fox News, Fox Business, and Fox News.

Except for once a day, when it’s time for Two Minute Hate. After that, the third one gets switched to “Ow! My Balls!”

 
 

Okay, people, I found the reason why unclosed tags reformatted subsequent comments and fixed it. Unclosed tags will only fuck up your own comment now. Anybody can make a blog, but it takes a fag to make it pretty.

 
 

Here’s why I always use blockquotes and avoid tagfail: I don’t type the things.

Windows users get Autohotkey: your sucky systems will suck less and your co-workers will think you’re a genius.

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/technology/10-ways-to-use-autohotkey-to-rock-your-keyboard.html

 
 

Anybody can make a blog, but it takes a fag to make it pretty.

YAY! We can have nice things!

*makes sure tag is closed*

 
 

MSN.com is also still headlining the insanity in Texas.

wait… that last part’s redundant.

 
 

That was a more relevant comment two minutes ago.

 
 

‘Cause, you know, grizzlys are known for not only being batshite insane but quitting things halfway through.

Palin bear

 
 

That was a more relevant comment two minutes ago.

That is very nearly always true.

Also, Subby turned me on to BBExtra for Firefox, which also takes care of those pesky tags, and also give you a whole bunch of kewl other tags that TINTIN WON’T LET US PLAY WITH!!!

 
 

Facebook was down & Western Civ. has NOT come to an end?

 
 

a whole bunch of kewl other tags that TINTIN WON’T LET US PLAY WITH!!!

PoopPlay in your own sandbox.

 
 

Don’t bb codes only work on certain forums?

 
 

The zombie might be interested to know that I now use Quicksilver and its Shelf for tags. Covers more than just Firefox.

I’d actually prefer Autohotkey on the Mac: it’s one of the few really awesome things a Windows machine can have that my Mac could use.

 
 

I get the feeling that “Pledge to America” is much like “The purity pledge”;

No matter what they promise, majority of them will be fucked sooner rather then later
.

 
 

Personally, I think the West’s obsession with capitalism is playing right into their hands now that they’ve learned to play the game, but maybe that’s just me.

No, not just you. I think the Chinese are going to master the game and much of the rest of the world is going to have to play by their rules. Someone can correct me on this if need be, but don’t Chinese interests hold enough US debt instruments that they could bring our economy down?

Obviously, they have incentives not to do that (i.e. markets for their stuff). But hey, if it helps the average person in this country, I’m all for them stepping in.

 
 

I guess my thought is: Perhaps the Chinese financial interests are powerful enough to stand up to US and multinational interests controlling much of our economic decision making. I dunno, I would just like to see someone do something in the interests of us wretched proles.

*cue “Impossible Dream” music*

 
 

From tigris’ link:
This image provided by the Missoula County Sheriff’s Office shows the zucchini used by a Montana woman

Evidently the readers of Yahoo news are not sufficiently familiar with the appearance of a zucchini, and need an aid to visualisation.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Evidently the readers of Yahoo news are not sufficiently familiar with the appearance of a zucchini, and need an aid to visualisation.

Well, I’m sure that mostly Americans read Yahoo news.

 
 

China’s model = authoritarian capitalism. Which is closer to fascism than anything else, methinks.

I guess my thought is: Perhaps the Chinese financial interests are powerful enough to stand up to US and multinational interests controlling much of our economic decision making

Sure. And then replace those interests with their own.

I dunno, I would just like to see someone do something in the interests of us wretched proles.

I really doubt if anything the CCP and its new corporate buddies have planned is going to be good for any of us “wretched proles.”

 
 

“Zucchini” is such a foreign-sounding word, I’m sure all right-thinking Americans have no idea what it looks like or even if it’s edible.

“YOU CAN’T GET IT AT MCDONALD’S? WHAT KINDA FURRIN SHIT IS THAT? *BELCH*”

 
 

Chris: Fair enough. I am no expert on the Chinese government or its flavor of capitalism.

I not only stand corrected, I sit down corrected as well.

 
 

Oh thank God, it was somebody else’s fault.

I hear ya! I did it recently.

But assholes are relatively quiet, hard working and unquestionably necessary.

Dan wishes his was doing double doody, though.

 
 

No, not just you. I think the Chinese are going to master the game and much of the rest of the world is going to have to play by their rules. Someone can correct me on this if need be, but don’t Chinese interests hold enough US debt instruments that they could bring our economy down?

They do, and I remembr during the Vietnam Era there was a widespread belief that, to Asians, life was cheap, but if they play that card, they’re commiting economic suicide. USA! USA! Too Big To Fail. For now.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

And I love what they did with checkers!

The Asian supermarket down the street from me has Chinese checkers. They are pretty awesome.

 
 

This guy is like a black man who joins the Klan or Frank Collins the American Nazi who turned out to be Jewish. He’s not stupid he’s mentally ill.

 
 

Surprise, idiot conservatives try to turn their lack of knowledge into an attack on Obama.

Maybe we should tell them that lots of Jews go Galt at sundown every Friday.

 
 

attack on Obama

Now it will be spun as having been deliberately scheduled for Sukkot to offend Jews, ISREAL!! & all decent goobers ever’whar.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

M, where is everybody? You’d think they have lives or something.

 
 

OT business update, homies: the first school fundraiser using our state products catalog ends tomorrow, and today we got not one, but two calls from people associated with other schools in the same town. The first one is the head of a PTA at another elementary; she had ordered from a student doing our fundraiser because she was really impressed with the products, and wanted information about our company, etc so they could do a fundraiser with us next year. The second one was a teacher at a middle school; her son attends the school that’s doing the sale with us. She said it was the “best thing I’ve ever seen” and wants us to do a sale with her school – she said her son usually sells about 4 items when the school does the crappy cookie dough/giftwrap/candy bar fundraisers, but this time he’s sold 17 items. If that’s any indication of how it’s going for all the students, the school will raise at least twice as much in their sale as they have in the past – at least $50,000.

I think I might not end up losing my house by the time this all starts playing out. Keep your fingers crossed!

 
 

The fact is:

John Kasich will be the next governor of Ohio. I hope he will take Ohio down the path of economic freedom and kick out the bums and leaches. I want taxes and all government services to disaper.

 
 

Best of luck, Jennifer.

 
 

You mis-spelt “diaper.”

 
 

The fact is, as soon as government services disappear, it will be worth our while to track down your IP address and find out where you live so we can drive by and lob a molotov cocktail through the window. Then you can enjoy whatever “free market solution” which may or may not exist to try to keep all your shit from burning up. No matter though, with the huge tax savings (snerk!) you’ll realize, you’ll no doubt easily be able to just go buy all new stuff. And that will be good for the economy! Everyone wins!

 
 

Thanks, tig. My sleepless nights are now devoted more to “oh shit, we’ve got 500 orders to fill!” than they are to “oh shit, I’m going to go broke!” Which I suppose is an improvement.

 
 

The fact is, Ohio needs to Go Galt! No more handouts to moochers and drains on the producers, no more subsidies for minorites and the lazy, no more rewards for being lazy and unproductive…. boy the liberals will be crying when Kasich the NEXT GOVNR OF OH takes office on November 3rd, but prosperoty will return to The Heartland and the liberals can suck it.

 
 

Git down, Jennifer!

Also: Wooo!

Thinking part: Sadly, that’s almost a recession-proof biz. As funding diapersdisappearsdecreases, there’ll no doubt be more activity at the school & district levels to get money from all the Galtoids saving on their property taxes & laughing at shrinking gummint.

 
 

The fact is, all government services except defense are unconsititional and can be done better by the free market and that includes education, roads, fire and police protection which should be billed to insurance polices.

 
 

The fact is, Obamas Hitler-like way of governing insitututung Sharia law and taking away are freedom and the consititution and God is soon about the end when we begin im peaching him for crimes agains the people!

 
 

where is everybody? You’d think they have lives or something.

See what you did:

Gary Ruppert said,
September 24, 2010 at 3:21

The fact is:

John Kasich will be the next governor of Ohio. I hope he will take Ohio down the path of economic freedom and kick out the bums and leaches. I want taxes and all government services to disaper.

Gary Ruppert said,
September 24, 2010 at 3:28

The fact is, Ohio needs to Go Galt! No more handouts to moochers and drains on the producers, no more subsidies for minorites and the lazy, no more rewards for being lazy and unproductive…. boy the liberals will be crying when Kasich the NEXT GOVNR OF OH takes office on November 3rd, but prosperoty will return to The Heartland and the liberals can suck it.

And a fake. Real Gary wasn’t vulgar.

 
 

fire and police protection which should be billed to insurance polices

Yeah, right. Gives me a chance to pimp, though: Sharron Angle & her ideas about insurance.

Or don’t indulge me: Less cranky, more detail, same video.

 
 

I don’t know how to tell him this, but I just don’t think that watermelon as all that into him.

 
 

Evidently the readers of Yahoo news are not sufficiently familiar with the appearance of a zucchini, and need an aid to visualisation.

That zucchini is making me feel inferior.

 
 

I think I might not end up losing my house by the time this all starts playing out.

And that’s the goal in Ronald Reagan’s Dick Cheney’s Ayn Rand’s ‘merka.

 
 

The Founding Fathers were traitors.

Well, yes. Literally. Just not to the U.S.

 
 

I am on your foundling coattails, riding them.

What The Founding Fathers Hated Most

 
 

foundling = typo.

Damn.

 
 

What The Founding Fathers Hated Most

Not even an honorable mention for masturbation and condoms? Feh.

 
 

I meant honourable.

 
 

The Fondling Fathers are a separate issue.

 
 

Arrrggghhh! approaching 200 comments? I’ll have to catch up later….

Okay here you Mr/Ms Bouffant:

VIDEOTHERWISE: “Oh Dem Watermelons”
“Oh Dem Watermelons” … In one scene: “I just went up to the heavy equipment operator and asked the guy to smash a watermelon with his vehicle so I could film it, …
videotherwise.blogspot.com/2009/04/oh-?dem-watermelons.html – Cached
YouTube – Oh Dem WatermelonsOh Dem Watermelons by Robert Nelson 1965. purotine | August 23, 2008. Oh Dem Watermelons by Robert Nelson … I just saw this today in one of my film classes…..VERY TRIPPY!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvs0-nPNha8 – Cached.Play Video.Oh Dem Watermelons (1965)
This great short film has to be seen in order to truly appreciate its impact. … Discuss this movie with other users on IMDb message board for Oh Dem Watermelons (1965)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0141679 – Cached
Humor As Art: Oh, Dem Watermelons by Robert Nelson
… the film finds melons used as bombs, footballs, baseballs, shooting targets, even as sensuous love objects. … Oh, Dem Watermelons by Robert Nelson
fightuptight.blogspot.com/2009/06/oh-?dem-watermelons-by… – Cached
Expresión en Corto 2007 Presents : Oh Dem …
Expresión en Corto 2007 Presents Oh Dem Watermelons … Un clásico del underground estadounidense. Esta película originalmente se exhibió como una …
expresionencorto.bside.com/2007/?_view=_?filmdetails&… – Cached
U B U W E B – Film & Video: Robert Nelson: Oh Dem Watermelons …
Watch U B U W E B – Film & Video: Robert Nelson: Oh Dem Watermelons (1965) and thousands of other similar videos from around the web.
vodpod.com/watch/4018929-u-b-u-w-e-b-?film-video-robert… – Cached

Catch up to yuh later….

 
 

foundling = typo.

Damn.

Yep, knew I should make that clear.

 
 

Well, lookie here;

http://www.gallup.com/poll/143195/Americans-Trust-Foreign-Domestic-Affairs.aspx

“Americans Trust U.S. More On Foreign Than Domestic Affairs.”

Well, no shit. Because we’re not the ones on the receiving end of our foreign policy; foreigners are. The military is the most popular institution in America partly for the same reason.

Back in the real world. Our foreign policy isn’t better than our domestic; they’re made by the same people. Our military isn’t less prone to screwing up than our police departments or the FBI; by and large, they’re populated by the same kind of people. If anything, I’d say our foreign and military policy are more likely to be bad, since foreigners can’t vote and are therefore quite useless (in cold and practical terms) to the people who make it.

But it’s always easy to support policies and institutions when you don’t have to pay the price for their mistakes.

 
 

foundling = typo.

Damn.

Yep, knew I should make that clear.

On that note of disappointment, I’m off to bed. Only a 50/50 chance of sleep, but horizontality shall be achieved.

 
 

Facebook was down & Western Civ. has NOT come to an end?

you obviously have not been paying attention. Although I don’t think it can ALL be blamed on Facebook.

 
 

Only a 50/50 chance of sleep

N_B & JennofArk make me glad to be bi-polar/depressive & likely to sleep the sleep of the righteouslog-like.

Good luck w/ the inner turmoil, all.

 
 

Facebook was down & Western Civ. has NOT come to an end?

I guess the Randroid In Chief ain’t as vital as he thought he was.

 
 

Yer gay Republican bff has been reading Mike Adams again. I hadn’t checked in with Mike Adams in a long time but he’s on a roll. His recent gay marriage piece is a breathtaking piece of illogic, bad reading, fear mongering, and, oh, wait, okay, it’s pretty normal for a Townhall column. I used to have mild sympathy for Adams. Sure, he’s an ass but, hey, every university needs a Republican ass and some of his targets did need poking but his recent columns are psycho. Typical Townhall crazy but, whew, he must be spending whatever he gets from Townhall and Regency on PCB. Take a look at his gay marriage screed:

“There are a couple of terms I need to stop using in my columns. One of those terms is “liberal” – most of the self-described liberals I write about in my columns are not tolerant enough to be called liberals. The other term is “gay” – most of the self-described gays I write about in my columns are not happy enough to be called gays. This is especially true of those who also call themselves “gay activists.”

The active aggression of gay activists is on full display each time they lobby for so-called gay marriage. These are the same people who argue that marriage is a form of patriarchal oppression, which benefits men more than women – despite the fact that this “patriarchal” institution shields women from violent crimes including rape. Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia – in addition to the emotional weakness that causes them to rely upon feminism in the first place…”

http://townhall.com/columnists/MikeAdams/2010/09/20/nothing_gay_about_it

 
 

despite the fact that this “patriarchal” institution shields women from violent crimes including rape.

Holy shit. I have no words. All I have is holy shit.

 
 

Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia – in addition to the emotional weakness that causes them to rely upon feminism in the first place…”

Double holy shit. This fuckface needs his own entry here at Sadly, No!

 
 

The Pledge to America.

FINALLY, those Republicans are coming up with some new ideas.

 
 

Dr. Mike often displayed/flayed at World O’Crap.

 
 

The Pledge to America.

IT’S A LEMON!

 
 

Full funding for missle defense. It’s about fucking time.

 
 

The Pledge to America.
IT’S A LEMON!

No waxy buildup–LIE!

 
 

Mr. Medvedev; Put back up this wall!

Missile fucking defense? Really? Star Wars again? These people are just beyond hope. I guess I already knew that, but imagine what they would be if Obama had in skill in the message war. Marginalized doesn’t even begin to describe it.

 
 

Oh no, what have I done? I’ve killed da wabbit. Er, the thread.

 
 

Ding dong, the thread is dead.

 
 

Dead, said thread.

 
 

No, ’twas beauty killed the thread.

 
 

Beauty , truth, virtue, the whole renaissance bullcrap that is extremely different from the “BS” of Professor Frankfurt’s book.

Watermellons bombs and T-eh S-urface toA-ir M-issles kiled the thread, but not until the next one comes up….

 
 

I can’t believe they think any country would be stupid enough to lob a missile at us. We have all these fucking satellites that could trace the fucker back to it’s origin in seconds then a short time later a single Trident missile turns the offending country into slag. If anyone really wants to nuke us all they need is a ship or a fucking cargo plane and the wingnuts 21st century Maginot line can’t do a damn thing about it.

 
 

Yeah, that’s all good and fine but, I like bananas.

 
 

Missile defense is a first strike weapon, counter-intuitive as that may sound.

Take out most of your adversary’s missiles with a first strike and then let your defenses stop whatever few he may have left to lob back at you.

This puts your potential adversary into a “use ’em or lose ’em” situation, which is why missile defenses are considered to be very destabilizing.

Think how scared shitless we would be if China had the ability to stop our missiles.

 
 

despite the fact that this “patriarchal” institution shields women from violent crimes including rape.

Wait, what?

Oh. Of course. You can’t get raped if you’re in the kitchen making me a fucking sammich, eh?

Fucking amazing.

An exceptionally good day for Trig.

 
 

Or does he mean, “Nice vagina youze gots dere. It’d be a shame if somethin should, y’know, happen to it.”

Because either way…

 
 

The Fondling Fathers are a separate issue.

That would be Benjamin Franklin I assume.

 
 

Missile fucking defense? Really? Star Wars again?

The last time you went through this cycle of nonsense in the 1980s, at least there was the excuse that people like Teller were faking results from teh Excalibur tests to make it look like SDI was actually a practical idea rather than an excuse to keep funding Livermore Laboratory. This time, no excuse at all.

Say what you like about the Cargo Cults, at least they didn’t expend 30% of their national income building mock planes out of sticks and bark.

 
 

The Fondling Fathers

Worst. Episode. of The Waltons. Evar.

 
 

This time, no excuse at all.

I give you, in all its magnificent horror: IRAN! Boogedy-boogedy!

 
 

Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia

Their forebrains have slipped through a gap in their abdominal muscles? That’s going to surprise the people in the Accident & Emergency Ward, and they’re not easily surprised. Also, what kind of hernia? Inguinal, umbilical, femoral, epigastric? Inquiring minds expect specificity in our metaphors.

If I were trying to think of a predominantly male condition to accuse feminists of suffering from, I think I would have gone for prostate disease instead. Or maybe hemophilia. But that’s just me

 
 

If I were trying to think of a predominantly male condition to accuse feminists of suffering from, I think I would have gone for prostate disease instead.

Intellectual prostate disease is a right-wing phenomenon, as lefties tend to be more prointernationalism.

 
 

Fondling Fathers; great seminarian band name.

How about ‘The Semenarians’? Maybe not so much.

 
 

John Sununu and the Semenenarians. Performing almost-live and still wriggling!

 
 

Missile defense; spend billions and billions of dollars setting up a system to defend us from ICBMs, only to learn that we still aren’t protected because 1) some of Russia’s missiles can still get through, 2) the Russians too are capable of smuggling nukes past our border and blowing us up the al-Qaeda way.

There’s a strategic reasoning as well behind missile defense, but it only applies if you’re idiotic enough to think nuclear wars are winnable.

 
 

Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia – in addition to the emotional weakness that causes them to rely upon feminism in the first place

Women are emotionally weak if they don’t depend on a man for their self-esteem?

I do believe this guy needs to get laid.

 
 

Speaking of SDI in general, and the Excalibur X-ray laser project in particular, I have a theory that the whole fiasco contributed a lot to the current suspicion amongst rightwingers that climate scientists are making up their results about climate change in order to maintain their research salaries. It proved, after all, that rightwing cold-warrior scientists at least (looking at Edward Teller here) are capable of making up results in order to maintain their research salaries.

 
 

Smut Clyde said,
September 24, 2010 at 14:17

Kinda like Nixon shattering faith in big government, then Bush shattering it again, eh?

PK: “Life is easy if you’re a conservative. Even if you screw up totally when in office, all you have to do is turn around and say ‘see, that proves our point. Government doesn’t work!'”

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

despite the fact that this “patriarchal” institution shields women from violent crimes including rape. Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia – in addition to the emotional weakness that causes them to rely upon feminism in the first place…”

Sadly enough, this is not the first time I’ve seen this “argument.”

Also, I’ll give you a severe intellectual hernia, motherfucker.This is the kind of person who says something so mind-bendingly awful to a feminist that all she can do is splutter in rage and confusion, and he takes that to be evidence that we’re angry and stupid.

Um, no. I am calm! You’re just an asshole!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Besides, I thought wearing long skirts and turtlenecks was what shielded us from rape?

Oh, I forgot about not drinking, not not leaving the house at night, not leaving the house by ourselves, not having tits, not having the audacity to be female to begin with…

Silly me! It’s just marriage! Maybe we should start marrying off 8-year-old girls to protect them from molestation, because marriage prevents rape, right?

 
 

What I love from the GOP’s “Pwedge” is that not only are there to be WEEKLY debates on spending cuts (after all, Congress needs to be less productive) but every spending bill is now going to have to specify where in the Constitution is provided for that spending. Typical conservative “HA! We got you NOW!” bullshit.

Protip, guys – missile defense isn’t listed in the Constitution, either. Wankers.

 
 

2) the Russians too are capable of smuggling nukes past our border and blowing us up the al-Qaeda way creating hurricane Katrina, thus defeating America.

Believe it. Or not.

(seriously, there’s some evidence the Russians (or Chinese) did precisely that, and that we are in a “cold war” using weather).

 
 

not having tits

If Katy Perry didn’t, she’d be on Sesame Street.

 
 

Evidently the readers of Yahoo news are not sufficiently familiar with the appearance of a zucchini, and need an aid to visualisation.

In fairness, that was one fucking big zucchini. Most of the ones I see in my market look like cucumbers, and I too wondered how the fuck the bear got scared by that.

I mean, it’s not like I flashed my penis at him.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Ugh. Got out of the boat.

That column is nigh eliminationist.

“Medical insurance premiums will rise in order to offset healthcare costs associated with the bad lifestyle choices typically made by homosexuals. AIDS, colon cancer, and hepatitis are only a few examples of the costly consequences of these bad choices.”

Strangely, lesbians are always absent from these “arguments,” given that the rate of STIs among people who identify as lesbians is much lower than the rate of STIs among people who identify as straight.

 
 

because marriage prevents rape, right?

Not if you’re into role playing.

 
 

You can get colon cancer from teh ghey sex?

How come you can’t get mouth cancer from oral sex?

Of course…you can’t!

 
 

Scare headline on MSN.com:

Dems in worst shape than in 1994

New Voter Confidence Index indicates party in power heading for midterm losses as severe as 1994.

Only that’s not the case when you get into the article:

That’s eight points worse than where President Clinton and the Democrats stood in 1994, when Democrats lost 54 seats in the House and eight in the Senate. Does that mean Democrats are doomed to repeat 1994? Not necessarily. There were mitigating structural factors in 1994, including more Democratic retirements and an environment that seemed to sneak up on longtime incumbents. Neither is the case this year.

I’m getting the impression the MSM wants the GOP back in power, I really am.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Of course…you can’t!

Well, of course not.

You can get anal cancer from HPV, but you can get cervical cancer from HPV, too, so what the fuck ever. Vaccines for EVERYONE!

 
 

Oh, and evidently the oil spill was the Democrats’ fault as well. Buh?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Oh, and evidently the oil spill was the Democrats’ fault as well. Buh?

Sure, why not? Everything else is!

 
 

Oh, and evidently the oil spill was the Democrats’ fault as well. Buh?

Well of course! If we hadn’t insisted on all those “inspections” and “reg-u-lay-shuns” BP would have been free to stick a pipe in the ground and pump more easily!

Nevermind that it was the fact that BP was allowed by the GOP to do their own inspections and check themselves out.

 
 

Nevermind that it was the fact that BP was allowed by the GOP to do their own inspections and check themselves out.

Well, gosh! It was in their own “enlightened self-interest” to do those inspections and make sure everything was safe! rarrrOBJECTIWOLVERINES

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Nevermind that it was the fact that BP was allowed by the GOP to do their own inspections and check themselves out.

Well, gosh! It was in their own “enlightened self-interest” to do those inspections and make sure everything was safe!

It’s much more important to believe in the rationality of the free market than to prevent the complete destruction to an entire ecosystem again!

 
 

It’s much more important to believe in the rationality of the free market than to prevent the complete destruction to an entire ecosystem again!

Objective reality has probably caused more problems for the world than any other philosophy.

 
 

This might be my favorite story this week. (slightly NSFW)

 
 

Ohmy. Today is Donalde Duckass’ birthday. We should send him a cake.

 
 

I’m getting the impression the MSM wants the GOP back in power, I really am.

So am I.

It’s much more important to believe in the rationality of the free market than to prevent the complete destruction to an entire ecosystem again!

Don’t worry. Karl Rove said believing would create our own reality.

 
 

Today is Donalde Duckass’ birthday. We should send him a cake.

CAKE ISREAL!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Objective reality has probably caused more problems for the world than any other philosophy.

“Objective reality”=the delusion that “man” is “rational.”

 
 

CAKE ISREAL!

PERFECT!

 
 

“Objective reality”=the delusion that “man” is “rational.”

It goes deeper than that, I fear. I’m talking about the objectivism that allows a man or woman to turn his back on a fellow man.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

It goes deeper than that, I fear. I’m talking about the objectivism that allows a man or woman to turn his back on a fellow man.

Well, that’s rational, right? I mean, like, helping other people is BORING.

 
 

(seriously, there’s some evidence the Russians (or Chinese) did precisely that, and that we are in a “cold war” using weather).
orly?

 
 

Well, that’s rational, right? I mean, like, helping other people is BORING.

Actually, given the logic that all of us at one time or other need help, it’s irrational not to help.

 
 

I just saw something on the internet about “Cake Israel.” Clearly this is another instance where the leftists are hoping Israel gets nuked. Doubt me? Where else would the term “cake” come from, if not “yellowcake?” These libtards think they are clever, but I can see through their games.

 
 

Rly, if you stretch your imagination.

Personally, I don’t believe it, but I watched a program last night that provided some evidence that shortly after the HAARP project was completed and activated, weather started getting screwy.

Of course, there are other more reasonable explanations, but it has been the stated goal of the US military to weaponize weather.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Actually, given the logic that all of us at one time or other need help, it’s irrational not to help.

SHHHHH.

 
 

BIRTHDAY CAKE ISREAL!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Today is Front Desk Marine’s birthday, too.

My co-worker made GF cake so I could have some! Awww.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

So, BIRTHDAY CAKE IS SORTA REAL!

 
 

“HAARP?”

Hairy old people association?

 
 

HAARP = High Frequency Active Auroral Research Program

 
 

CAKE ISREAL is obviously another example of liberal hatred of Juses, in this case wishing them to eat sugary food and thereby suffer from diabetes.I stand by what I wrote! Toodle-loo!

 
 

The conspiracy theories linked to HAARP make the 9/11 Truthers look sane. Still, there is some effect on the atmosphere and some demonstrations were made in the program last night that lend some credence to some form of weather control.

 
 

My co-worker made GF cake so I could have some!

Sexist. I bet you wouldn’t eat boyfriend cake.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Sexist. I bet you wouldn’t eat boyfriend cake.

I would if it was chocolate.

 
 

HAARP sounds pretty implausible to me. If I were funding super weapons, I’d stick with something that produces verifiable results, like men who stare at goats.

 
 

Sexist. I bet you wouldn’t eat boyfriend cake.

I would if it was chocolate.

Why you hate white men?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Why you hate white men?

I’m an emotionally stunted feminist. What can I say?

 
 

I’m an emotionally stunted feminist. What can I say?

“I’m an emotionally stunted feminist”?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

“I’m an emotionally stunted feminist”?

I’m an emotionally stunted feminist.

 
 

I’m an emotionally stunted feminist.

So it’s all about the meat?

 
 

Say good night, Trucky.

 
 

Evidently the readers of Yahoo news are not sufficiently familiar with the appearance of a zucchini, and need an aid to visualisation.

Yes, but it’s THE ACTUAL zucchini she hefted. That’s NEWS, that is.

Facebook was down & Western Civ. has NOT come to an end?

It did make me cranky. Well, crankier.

What The Founding Fathers Hated Most

Wow, great link.

Feminists who claim to be anti-rape and anti-marriage simply suffer from severe intellectual hernia – in addition to the emotional weakness that causes them to rely upon feminism in the first place

He’s hysterical.

John Sununu and the Semenenarians.

Santorum and the Semenarians.

I have a theory that the whole fiasco contributed a lot to the current suspicion amongst rightwingers that climate scientists are making up their results about climate change in order to maintain their research salaries.

Right-wing projection? UNPOSSIBLE! Apparently they only believe in scientific fraud when it goes unproven in fields they disbelieve, while proven fraud in fields close to their hearts is met with LOOK SOMETHING SHINY! and continued support.

You can get colon cancer from teh ghey sex?

OMG, Reagan was GAY?!!!

 
 

Oh, wait, POPE Santorum and the Semenarians.

 
 

Eternal lurker Snoww-man checkin’ in to say, once again, that you all are teh awesome.

Oh and the new kid, Bilo? Can we keep her/him/them/it? Please Please PLEASE can we?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

So it’s all about the meat?

Nah. It’s all about the cake.

Say good night, Trucky.

*sigh* Good night, Trucky.

 
 

Oh and the new kid, Bilo? Can we keep her/him/them/it? Please Please PLEASE can we?

You promise to walk him? I don’t want him scratching at the door one cold rainy November night and hear you whine about your homework.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

You promise to walk him? I don’t want him scratching at the door one cold rainy November night and hear you whine about your homework.

And bathe him at least once or twice a week. I hate dog smell.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Oh, and he’s not allowed on the couch.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

McArdle is a cunt.

Sans depth, warmth, etc etc.

 
 

From T&U’s link:

Now she’s onto school loans. Perhaps to compensate for his frequent logrolling, she quotes Ole Perfesser Glenn Reynolds to the effect that we just make people soft by letting them take subsidized loans to get into college.

Please say this is satire.

 
 

Cripes.

Who but a lunatic would loan money to an eighteen year old with no job and no credit record, in the hopes that they will graduate college and begin speedy repayment?

And yet they do. And then pursue you for the rest of your life for it back.

Don’t get me fscking started on student loans. Just… don’t. They should goddamn be abolished in favor of direct government payment to the colleges, or something.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 
 

They should goddamn be abolished in favor of direct government payment to the colleges, or something.

You mean a subsidy? Like in France?

 
 

They really do want to take this country back to the Fifties, don’t they?

The 1350s, I mean.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Don’t get me fscking started on student loans. Just… don’t. They should goddamn be abolished in favor of direct government payment to the colleges, or something.

Yeah, me, neither. It usually descends into rocking in the corner and mumbling about Sallie Mae.

Although I actually paid off my Sallie Mae loan already. With a Direct Loan.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

And actually, I should stipulate that I have a pretty low load of student debt, comparatively. And probably could have avoided some of it.

 
 

Jeebus.

The subcommittee chairman invited the Comedy Central personality to testify at the hearing, which addressed the possibility of offering illegal immigrant farm workers a path to citizenship. Colbert’s “expertise” in the arena of immigration and farm labor stems from a July 2010 episode of his TV show “The Colbert Report,” during which he joined subcommittee chairwoman Rep. Zoe Lofgren to spend a day doing the work of an agriculture laborer.

Speaking in character as a bigoted and irate “free-market guy,” Colbert argued in his testimony that “we have to do something” about the plight of farm workers “because I am not going back out there.”

“At this point, I break into a sweat at the salad bar,” he said.

It’s unclear upon how many members of the committee the joke was lost.

Let me guess – all of them, particularly the GOP ones.

 
 

You mean a subsidy? Like in France?

Exactly. Here’s one place I would support vouchers.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

The 1350s, I mean.

The best thing is that they think they’ll be part of the elite.

Um, got news for you, kiddos. You’re just as fucked as the rest of us.

 
 

Oh, and he’s not allowed on the couch.
I’m ashamed of you. treating the new entity like he/she/it’s a dog.
Bilo could be anything. A man, a woman, an intersexed person, a dog, a cat a goldfish, a golem, an elf, an allegorical figure, a collective manifestation of mankind’s hopes and dreams, a hyperintelligent shade of the color blue, or even the internet itself come to life. Until we know for sure just who or what Bilo is, let’s show a little respect people.

 
 

Oh. And.

Colbert’s “expertise” in the arena of immigration and farm labor stems from a July 2010 episode of his TV show “The Colbert Report,” during which he joined subcommittee chairwoman Rep. Zoe Lofgren to spend a day doing the work of an agriculture laborer.

which I guarantee you is closer than anyone on any Congressional subcommitte has ever come to day labor, therefore more “expertise” than any of them have.

 
 

Speaking in character as a bigoted and irate “free-market guy,” Colbert argued in his testimony that “we have to do something” about the plight of farm workers “because I am not going back out there.”

I’m really disappointed in Colbert.

 
 

Until we know for sure just who or what Bilo is, let’s show a little respect people.

You promise to sprinkle food in his bowl before you go to work in the morning? I don’t want to come home to him floating on the surface!

 
 

Idiot: But homeownership and college aren’t causes of middle-class status, they’re markers for possessing the kinds of traits — self-discipline, the ability to defer gratification, etc. — that let you enter, and stay, in the middle class. Subsidizing the markers doesn’t produce the traits; if anything, it undermines them.

Education is a mere marker, and no one who is self-disciplined etc is unable to afford it. Why bother to educate at all? Better to send toddlers into coalmines and see who scratches out the biggest pile of coal and survives.

 
 

“At this point, I break into a sweat at the salad bar,” he said.

At Appleby’s?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

I don’t want to come home to him floating on the surface!

We already had to flush two new commenters this month!

 
 

Bilo’s not new, he’s posted here several times before.

 
 

But homeownership and college aren’t causes of middle-class status, they’re markers for possessing the kinds of traits — self-discipline, the ability to defer gratification, etc. — that let you enter, and stay, in the middle class.

So….a plumber works his fingers to the bone to save up enough to try to give his kids a kick start on a college education. He’s– BY INSTAPUTZHEAD’S OWN DEFINITION– middle class.

But because he can’t save enough to pay outright for college, there should be no resource for his kids to STAY middle class?

 
 

HAARP? I thought Remo blew that up and kill the CEO of the company making it?

 
 

But because he can’t save enough to pay outright for college, there should be no resource for his kids to STAY middle class?

Of course not, because argle bargle free market blah blah personal responsibility yadda yadda shut up that’s why.

 
 

By the way, where’s Steve and his crowing about Paladino being six points down to Cuomo?

Just one day after a poll showed his Republican opponent, Carl P. Paladino, with surprising strength in a one-to-one matchup, a new survey from a different polling organization showed Mr. Cuomo with a far wider margin. The new poll (pdf), issued by the Siena Research Institute, showed Mr. Cuomo leading Mr. Paladino by 57 percent to 24 percent, with Rick A. Lazio, who lost the Republican primary but remains in the race on the Conservative Party line, earning 8 percent.

 
 

I thought Remo blew that up and kill the CEO of the company making it?

Ahhhhhhhhh, that was the beginning of the adventure, remember?

 
 

Of course not, because argle bargle free market blah blah personal responsibility yadda yadda shut up that’s why.

Did I mention the plmuber was Republican? And his name was (not) Joe?

 
 

But because he can’t save enough to pay outright for college, there should be no resource for his kids to STAY middle class?
And estate taxes are bad because they make the poor suffering hyper rich parents leave only enough of their estates to their children to make them mega rich.

 
 

Education is a mere marker

For some people – I’m looking at you, MM – it’s barely a crayon.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Bilo’s not new, he’s posted here several times before.

I know.

I just got carried away.

 
 

Ahhhhhhhhh, that was the beginning of the adventure, remember?

You guys are old. Wasn’t the next movie supposed to take place in France, or was that just AotKT?

 
 

Do you ever get idea the people who complained really hate themselves and use that self-loathing to make everyone else as miserable as possible?

Almost like living Nosferatu.

 
 

I just got carried away.

Easy to do. I also want a pet.

 
 

Do you ever get idea the people who complained really hate themselves and use that self-loathing to make everyone else as miserable as possible?

That’s the dress? Sheesh, I really expected egregious boobage after the uproar, that just looks like a lady in a dress-up costume.

 
 

The best thing is that they think they’ll be part of the elite.

Um, got news for you, kiddos. You’re just as fucked as the rest of us.

Conservatism teabagger-style, as opposed to robber baron style. You get to feel just as smug, superior and puffed up as those rich fucks in Wall Street and on Fox News, without actually being materially ahead of the game in any way.

The elitism of people who wish they were elites but never will be. Really, really, really pathetic.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Did I mention the plmuber was Republican? And his name was (not) Joe?

Well, if he just went without cable for thirty years, he could easily pay tuition for a mediocre state school and even some of his kid’s rent if he lives in a cheap area!

 
 

You get to feel just as smug, superior and puffed up as those rich fucks in Wall Street and on Fox News, without actually being materially ahead of the game in any way.

but but but you get rich by thinking rich! And you join the upper classes by kowtowing to their every need! It’s so simple even a bonoboTeabagger could do it!

 
 

Do you ever get idea the people who complained really hate themselves and use that self-loathing to make everyone else as miserable as possible?

If you’re a social conservative with a thousand-foot stick up your ass, self-loathing’s practically a requirement. Look up all their Biblical rants about how evil and disgusting and irredeemable humanity.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Look up all their Biblical rants about how evil and disgusting and irredeemable humanity.

But Teh Free Market is inherently rational.

 
 

but but but you get rich by thinking rich!

Best line ever from Bill Whittle (himself the most vapid sack of shit currently working for PJTV), delivered during a rant about the value of positive thinking;

“I have never thought of myself as a poor person. Even in the worst of times, I have always thought of myself as a rich person experiencing severe cash-flow problems.” (n/ verbatim)

That’s probably because you’ve never been a poor person, Billy. The closest you’ve ever come is to be a rich person, experiencing severe cash-flow problems. And the fact that you think the “difference” between those is a state of mind speaks volumes for the degree to which you’ve led a pampered, privileged, sheltered and navel-gazing life.

 
 

Do you ever get idea the people who complained really hate themselves and use that self-loathing to make everyone else as miserable as possible?
It confuses my why so many rich people and their assorted toadies lackeys and lickspittles are so self loathing. I mean, I and many others across the country are working overtime, pulling double shifts to loathe them. How much loathing do they need?

 
 

I mean, I and many others across the country are working overtime, pulling double shifts to loathe them.

I’m doing my part for the war effort!

 
 

Ladies and Gentlemen, the next Senator from West Virginia:

HOST: Tell us a little bit about you and your business experience and how you got here.

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do. I hope more people in this country have that opportunity as soon as we abolish inheritance tax in this country, which is a key part of my program.

 
 

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do. I hope more people in this country have that opportunity as soon as we abolish inheritance tax in this country, which is a key part of my program.

As Mike Malloy used(?) to say, “Have I mentioned yet how much I HATE these people!?”

 
 

cAnceR haT said,
September 24, 2010 at 6:55
Beauty , truth, virtue, the whole renaissance bullcrap that is extremely different from the “BS” of Professor Frankfurt’s book.
Watermellons bombs and T-eh S-urface toA-ir M-issles kiled the thread, but not until the next one comes up….

You’ve broken the code. Now I have to start all over again.

 
 

I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do.

I really should have chosen that route. What was I thinking?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

It confuses my why so many rich people and their assorted toadies lackeys and lickspittles are so self loathing. I mean, I and many others across the country are working overtime, pulling double shifts to loathe them. How much loathing do they need?

The kind of people who fetishize wealth are also the kind of people who expect wealth to make them happy. Their self-loathing grows as their wealth grows…they can’t figure out why they’re not happy yet, so they keep acquiring. See: RUSH LIMBAUGH.

Their lackeys believe the same.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do. I hope more people in this country have that opportunity as soon as we abolish inheritance tax in this country, which is a key part of my program.

This is not for real.

 
 

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it.

…you see because that stack of cash is the same as Wholly Mammoth and taht proves I come from superior stock.

 
 

ROTFLcopter –

HOST: Tell us a little bit about you and your business experience and how you got here.

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do.

So that’s what I’ve been doing wrong all these years! Hey, does that work both ways? Maybe my kids can just inherit all the debt I’ll have accumulated when you and yours are done with this country.

 
 

Damnation. Please tell me I didn’t just doom the whole thread to blockquotes…

 
 

Ah, good.

That would have been unfortunate, especially after the Tourette’s episode I had at yesterday’s threadbreakers.

 
 

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do. I hope more people in this country have that opportunity as soon as we abolish inheritance tax in this country, which is a key part of my program.

Y’know, in a state with as many coal miners as WV has, you’d think it’s the people who work IN the mines that would be dopey…

 
 

I’m trying to figure out how the missile defense bullshit fits into the “reign in federal spending” trope these losers keep fapping over. Apparently my logical reasoning skills are broke.

 
 

I think we should start killing all the people in our lives and demanding our inheritances.

 
 

Fraid it is. He said it on camera microphone

Pendantically fixed

 
 

“But sire, the happiest man in your kingdom has no shirt”

This is the dumbest fucking piece of shit of a fable ever written. I can’t believe anyone would take this to mean that living in crushing poverty can bring happiness.

 
 

I think we should start killing all the people in our lives and demanding our inheritances.
I did that years ago. Now I need new parents, money’s getting pretty tight.

 
 

I did that years ago. Now I need new parents, money’s getting pretty tight.

1) Find a rich guy
2) Kill him
3) Forge adoption papers
4) PROFIT!

 
 

Someone said it in the last thread:

Mistake number one for jobless people: The failure to select wealthy parents.

Credit to the person who wrote this–I’m way to lazy to look back–or type that second o in too.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

I think we should start killing all the people in our lives and demanding our inheritances.

HA!

Ha ha!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

 
 

How much loathing do they need?

Did Oreos need double stuffing?

 
 

I think we should start killing all the people in our lives and demanding our inheritances.

Excellent! I always wanted to be the richest man in the prison.

 
 

Mistake number one for jobless people: The failure to select wealthy parents.

Right? I distinctly remember being given a choice in Baby Heaven, and somehow chose the drunk labourer over a Kennedy…

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

If, like, actual, common, everyday people vote for that guy even after knowing what he said….

Well, I just don’t know what to say about that.

 
 

Excellent! I always wanted to be the richest man in the prison.

Didn’t you see Goodfellas? They get treated like royalty! It’s better than living in the Four Seasons!

 
 

If, like, actual, common, everyday people vote for that guy even after knowing what he said….

Their hoping to leave an inheritance to their children.

Nevermind that ten generations of them have sweated for their dinner. Nevermind that three generations of them work side-by-side in the same fucking coal mine or Wal-Mart. No, they’ll be sure as shootin’ rich. One day. You’ll see! Bookmark it, libs!

 
 

I’m trying to figure out how the missile defense bullshit fits into the “reign in federal spending” trope these losers keep fapping over. Apparently my logical reasoning skills are broke.

All Defense spending is Constitutionally PRE-approved.

See:
===
“We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility,provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselvesand our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
===
See? It’s all really clear when you know exactly what The Founders meant with all those ‘words’.

 
 

okay, so no header tags except in preview.

🙁

 
 

Didn’t you see Goodfellas? They get treated like royalty! It’s better than living in the Four Seasons!

Tragically for my cultural knowledge, I did not see Goodfellas.

I did, however, see Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan weasel their way out of repeated drug offenses that would have landed them in jail for 25 years if they’d been mortals like you or I.

Perhaps my inheritance can save me in similar fashion.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Nevermind that ten generations of them have sweated for their dinner. Nevermind that three generations of them work side-by-side in the same fucking coal mine or Wal-Mart. No, they’ll be sure as shootin’ rich. One day. You’ll see! Bookmark it, libs!

People used to cope with that by believing that they’ll have more in the afterlife. This is much more ingenious.

 
 

RAESE: I made my money the old-fashioned way, I inherited it. I think that’s a great thing to do. I hope more people in this country have that opportunity as soon as we abolish inheritance tax in this country, which is a key part of my program.

He apparently also expects rolling back to minimally regulated free-market health care to allow people die leaving more money to their heirs.

 
 

Guess I’ll have to do it without elitist tags.

“We the White Christian People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare. and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain, sanctify, holyficate and otherwise establish this Constitution for the White people of the United States of America.”

See? Right there in the Constitution.

 
 

All Defense spending is Constitutionally PRE-approved.

If you notice, Teh Pwedge specifically exempts spending for “the elderly, veterans and our troops”, thereby fulfilling the primacy of paying attention to bigoted old codgers who still use the term “Japs” and can’t userstand why we couldn’t win in ‘Nam.

Oh, BTW – according to the local fishwrap, the conservatives who are snarking about Teh Pwedge are just pissed that it doesn’t go far enough in kneecapping the government. Like they hated Bush for not deporting the brown people.

 
 

Needs more scare-quotes.

 
 

Like they hated Bush for not deporting the brown people. Invading and Occupying Mexico

Cuz ya know it’s true.

 
 

“Mistake number one for jobless people: The failure to select wealthy parents.

Right? I distinctly remember being given a choice in Baby Heaven, and somehow chose the drunk labourer over a Kennedy…”

Well, I chose the Kennedy. Little did I know that it would be a poor, drunk, Irishman….

 
 

oh, wait, they CAN understand why we didn’t win in ‘Nam – the liberal media, Jane Fonda and all those uppity kids. And not breaking out the nukes.

 
 

I’ll just leave this here.

 
 

1) Find a rich guy
2) Kill him
3) Forge adoption papers
4) PROFIT!

Ahem!

 
 

Oh, I think this goes here too.

 
 

Oh, I think this goes here too.

Ah-HEM.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

oh, wait, they CAN understand why we didn’t win in ‘Nam – the liberal media, Jane Fonda and all those uppity kids. And not breaking out the nukes.

Don’t forget John Kerry.

 
 

Pendantically fixed

Allow me to pedantically fix your pedantic fail.

Oh, and you’re all a bunch of commie fag freeloading losers for not winning the Ovary and Sperm Lottery.

Why do you hate America?

 
 

oh, wait, they CAN understand why we didn’t win in ‘Nam – the liberal media, Jane Fonda and all those uppity kids. And not breaking out the nukes.

Don’t forget John Kerry.

nor all the Fluoride.

 
 

Completely OT:

The Orange One apparently thinks everyone in the world is completely blind.

I mean, really. That’s like Joan Rivers trying to say she’s never had a facelift.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

The Orange One apparently thinks everyone in the world is completely blind.

Maybe he eats a lot of carrots!

 
 

Maybe he eats a lot of carrots!

If he doesn’t tan or use some spray-on product, the only explanation is that he bathes with 10W-40 …

Until winter. Then it’s 5W-20 …

 
 

Re: Colbert going over the heads of the Republicans on the committee,

Colbert’s sarcasm continued when he was questioned by lawmakers. Asked by the panel’s ranking Republican, Lamar Smith of Texas, how many workers joined him during his day on the New York farm, Colbert replied, “I didn’t take a count. I’m not good at math.” When Smith asked how many of them were illegal, Colbert replied, “I didn’t ask them for their papers, although I had a strong urge to.”

Smith asked Colbert if that one day on the farm made him an expert. Colbert replied, “I believe one day of me studying anything makes me an expert.”

And asked if he endorsed GOP policies, Colbert said, “I endorse all Republican policies without question,” prompting Smith to thank Colbert for his endorsement of the Republicans’ just-unveiled Pledge to America.

 
Save The Satire Fund
 

Please say this is satire.

The wish in our hearts to tell you what you want to hear is matched only by the pain of the truth that keeps us from saying it.

We here at the STSF now hear this exact same terrible lament more & more every year, while our resources continue to dry up & the malodorous deposits of Buzzkillium that the planet’s raging fuckheads leave in their wake grow ever larger & deadlier.

The horrifying reality has come to humanity without warning: in sufficient concentrations, idiocy is satirotoxic. As its permutations grow increasingly morbid & surreal they eventually become powerful enough to exterminate all lulz outright.

The forces of psychic ugliness are on the march, & with our time running out, science has so far yet to go before perfecting a satire bomb. We need your support in these desperate times like never before, & the consequences of failure may well be irreversible.

Won’t you please mock the shit out of something stupid today?

Bystanders are standing by, waiting for you to make that call!

 
 

And asked if he endorsed GOP policies, Colbert said, “I endorse all Republican policies without question,” prompting Smith to thank Colbert for his endorsement of the Republicans’ just-unveiled Pledge to America.

WHOOSH! (right over his head)

Kind of scary to think just how stoopit the members of Congress can be.

 
 

Now that I know the secret to financial security, I’m gonna get it right the next time, in my second life. My new parents are gonna be SO RICH. And my sparklepony’s gonna be so much sparklier than yours! *sticks out tongue*

 
 

The horrifying reality has come to humanity without warning: in sufficient concentrations, idiocy is satirotoxic. As its permutations grow increasingly morbid & surreal they eventually become powerful enough to exterminate all lulz outright.

What about the snarkinolol supplements I’ve been taking?

 
 

Colbert said, “I endorse all Republican policies without question,” prompting Smith to thank Colbert for his endorsement of the Republicans’ just-unveiled Pledge to America.

Smith then hiked up his miniskirt & reportedly told Colbert, “twenty bucks, same as in town.”

 
 

And my sparklepony’s gonna be so much sparklier than yours! *sticks out tongue*

Nice tongue you’ve got there. It would be a shame if something were to happen to it…

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Colbert’s a fucking genius. If/when we get through this insanity as a country, I think he’ll be admired as one of the great American satirists.

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

The forces of psychic ugliness are on the march, & with our time running out, science has so far yet to go before perfecting a satire bomb. We need your support in these desperate times like never before, & the consequences of failure may well be irreversible.

We need a Colbert army.

 
 

Nice tongue you’ve got there. It would be a shame if something were to happen to it…

Hey, maybe if you’re nice I’ll let you ride my sparklepony.

 
 

Hey, maybe if you’re nice I’ll let you ride my sparklepony.

pshyeah, “ride my sparklepony” indeed. I believe Mrs. __B might have something to say about that.

 
 

Mrs. __B is an empiricist and does not believe in sparkleponies.

 
 

This will not help your case when you try to tell Mrs. __B that VS “was giving out sparklepony rides and [you] hopped right on.”

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

AHEM.

I’m pretty sure N__B has said he’s a full-sized person. How will he ride that?!

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

Also, WTF?

I don’t know, but that picture always makes me laugh.

 
 

They’re hoping to leave an inheritance to their children.

I don’t believe it. I know some of them would do everything they could to spend it all before they died, ’cause those lazy good-for-nothing kids never did anything to deserve it…

 
 

I don’t know, but that picture always makes me laugh.

I’d never seen it. It just came up when I googled “my little pony with glitter”. I need to put in semi-random shit like that more often.

 
 

I’m pretty sure N__B has said he’s a full-sized person. How will he ride that?!

I believe the question you’re trying to ask is: How will I ride that without getting it embedded in my ass?

 
TruculentandUnreliable
 

I believe the question you’re trying to ask is: How will I ride that without getting it embedded in my ass?

Yes. I was trying to be delicate about it. Because if I am anything, it is couth.

 
 

Well, I chose the Kennedy. Little did I know that it would be a poor, drunk, Irishman….

Dude…I know you. We met at Malkin’s back in the late 70s…

 
 

Hey, maybe if you’re nice I’ll let you ride my sparklepony.

HOT.

I was planning on the fucking the rich guy route. I got the guy and the fucking down, now he just needs to get rich.

 
 

Pendantically fixed

Allow me to pedantically fix your pedantic fail.

Dude. Intentional “n”

 
 

I was planning on the fucking the rich guy route. I got the guy and the fucking down, now he just needs to get rich.

Perhaps if you worked on getting the fucking down on the upstroke?

 
 

I was planning on the fucking the rich guy route. I got the guy and the fucking down, now he just needs to get rich.

You picked the wrong rich guy

*eyeing motherlode of Spanish treasure*

 
 

Re: Colbert going over the heads of the Republicans on the committee

I really fucking wish he had been serious. This is not an issue to joke about in front of Congress.

 
 

You picked the wrong rich guy

Yes, well, you go to fuck with the guy you got, not the… no, that’s not right. If you can’t be with the one you fuck, fuck the one… hmm, that’s not it, either.

P.S. on the Spanish treasure, did I tell you about the cask of fine Amontillado I have in my cellar?

 
 

P.S. on the Spanish treasure, did I tell you about the cask of fine Amontillado I have in my cellar?

Have glass. Will travel.

 
 

I’ll bring the mortar!

 
 

I’ll bring the mortar!

Will you bring the vessel with the pestle, which holds the brew that is true?

 
 

This is not an issue to joke about in front of Congress.

We’ve traced the punchline … it’s coming from inside the government!

 
 

We’ve traced the punchline … it’s coming from inside the government!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

*running down corridors of government*

 
 

Dude. Intentional “n”

Oh.

** heads to thread thata way ===> **

 
 

vacuumslayer said,

September 24, 2010 at 19:34 (kill)

AHEM.

vacuumslayer said,

September 24, 2010 at 19:35 (kill)

Also, WTF?

AHEM. (can’t be arsed to find it – I posted that link some while back)

 
 

Now that I know the secret to financial security, I’m gonna get it right the next time, in my second life. My new parents are gonna be SO RICH. And my sparklepony’s gonna be so much sparklier than yours! *sticks out tongue*

I plan to find a rich person and fuck them. Maybe we can work out a deal?

 
 

They really do want to take this country back to the Fifties, don’t they?
The 1350s, I mean.

Studying at the University of Paris in 1350 wasn’t actually so expensive since no tuition fees — the teachers were paid by the church. Also, as a student you had benefit of clergy.

 
 

Who am a Bilo? I have two rows of teeth! They keep me in cage!

Oh wait, that’s Borat’s little brother.

I am Georgia
I am Memphis, Tennesee
I am everything
Hollywood wants to be
I am love and I am hate
I’m your late night drunk debate
But you’ll never put
Your finger on me

I am North and South Dakota
And New York City
I’m everything Hollywood wants to be
I am love and I am hate
And all the crtics can all debate
But they will never put a finger
On me
No you’ll never put a finger on me

And I am Boston and DC
And all of Detroit city!
I am everything
That Hollywood wants to be
I am Southern rock-n-roll
Country and hip hop soul
And you’ll never put a finger on me
I’m a father and and I’m a friend
I’m your brother till the end
But you’ll never put your finger on me
I am only God knows why
I’ll be a cowboy till I die
But youll never put you
Finger on me
You’ll never put your finger on me
You’ll never put
You’ll never put
Put your finger on me

Oh wait, that’s Kid Rock. I don’t have much in common with Kid Rock, other than being tall and heterosexual and white.

Oh, and you can put a finger in me, that might be nice. Not too roughly, just a prostate massage, thank you. Cankle scars aren’t a problem for me.

 
Christine O'Donnell
 

They came first for the Communists,
and I told them they lived in the blue house across the street.

Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I told them they were in the house next door.

Then they came for the Jews,
and I told them they were in the attic.

Then they came for me,
and I stepped into the van obediently.
And Lord would, like, somehow find a way to save me?

 
 

Pere Ubu done wrote:
“I’m getting the impression the MSM wants the GOP back in power, I really am.”

My guess is that a lot of them are just apolitical or “centrist” and to them, it’s all just sport. If your job is to cover horse races, or auto racing, you like lead changes. To me, that’s about as interesting and entertaining as the two-paged single-spaced description of a ping-pong game in Sacha Baron Cohen’s “Borat” book, if you’ve seen it.

I recommend the book, it’s not just a rehash of the movie content, it’s more crazy shitte

 
 

Subbie McG, I see your Clyde Thorson and raise you a Scott Thorson!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Thorson

 
 

Actor — before things got more high tech, there is a small precedent with our trying to use weather as a weapon. We seeded rain clouds to make monsoon season over the Ho Chi Minh trail even worse. Lots of good stuff here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Popeye

I’ve read elsewhere that we also tried an emulsifier to make the mud more slippery.

 
 

It happens once every month or so, I have charitable, open-minded thoughts about my political enemies. Maybe Boehner has Addison’s disease, or some other medical condition that makes him orangey? That’s what made JFK look so tan on the B&W TV’s, and in color pics. Back then, having a tan meant you had… VIGAH!

Nowadays, like smoking, and seat belts, and global warming, and 5,000 other things, tanning is just another cultural divide issue between those in the camp of hedonism and fate and pigheadedness vs. the Consumer Reports/Volvo Pussies/science/reason types.

OTOH, we’re now “discovering” Vitamin D deficiencies, having started to, you know, look for them. I have a coworker who came back from Iraq with that. Really. Inside whenever possible and covered up, to include gloves, when riding on patrol. (Gloves because hatch handles and weapons get HOT in the sun, among other reasons.)

Now, why does Boehner work for the forces of evil? Only the Orangey Shadow nows.

 
 

Ha ha ha.

Gay people who want to be republicans always have trouble when they discover that republicans don’t like gay people very much.

And when I say, “don’t like gay people very much,” I mean “would like them all to disappear, except for that Charles Nelson Reilly fellow, who was funny on Match Game, and that Liberace guy, who was good on the piano – except for them, no gays, please. Thank you.”

 
 

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