Aug
9
9
The Dumbest Argument Against Gay Marriage Ever Uttered By Someone Not Addicted To Vicodin
Shorter Msgr. Ross Xavier Pius Douthat, S.J., O.P., O.F.M., S.S.J., Th.D+, The New York Fucking Times Pope-Ed Page*
The Marriage Ideal
- Our only hope of decreasing the heterosexual divorce rate is by refusing to recognize gay “marriage.”
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
*Tbogg is also all over this POS op-ed
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:34
I would AHEM you, but it’s not like Douthat’s obscure or anything…
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:35
I for one welcome our gay-married overlords.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:36
Of course, I still think the “gay marriage causes rape” argument is much worse.
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:39
Is there a point to this entire article other than “I concede all of my opponents’ points, but I still support heterosexual only marriage JUST BECAUSE”?
round guy said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:39
So, if someone different from me does something, it invalidates what I’m doing?
That’s some powerful thinkin’ there.
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:40
Rather, it’s that lifelong heterosexual monogamy at its best can offer something distinctive and remarkable — a microcosm of civilization, and an organic connection between human generations — that makes it worthy of distinctive recognition and support.
How does lifelong heterosexual monogamy do this in a way that other relationships don’t? Because, you know, BULLSHIT.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:43
That’s the true shorter.
Pryme said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:43
And how do you know he’s not addicted to Vicodin?
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:43
Oh, Ross Douthat, NO.
Dude, you are embarrassing yourself. You are embarrassing the pope. You are embarrassing every person who was ever baptized in a Catholic Church, all the way back to St. Jerome. You are embarrassing ME.
Just stop. Go get a job sweeping out the elephant cage at the zoo. At this then the shit you will be shoveling has a useful purpose.
RobNYNY1957 said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:48
Even though heterosexuals have screwed up straight marriage so badly, we can’t let gay people give it a go. It might be harmful to an imaginary ideal that never really existed..
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:52
“OMG, there was so much less divorce 100 years ago.” Yeah; and “less divorces” simply meant “more unhappy marriages.” People made just as many mistakes then as they did today. Denying them the opportunity to rectify it didn’t make us a “better” society.
“Frequent out-of-wedlock births.” See above; should people who had a one-night stand be forced to marry someone they hardly know or be ostracized from society forever? Also numb-nuts, the fact that having a kid out of wedlock is now socially accepted makes women much less likely to consider abortion than 100 years ago.
“Serial monogamy.” As opposed to what? Women marrying anyone who’ll have them at age 30 because they’re becoming desperate and social pressures say if they’re not married, they’re worthless? Yeah, those were good times. (Still are, in the more conservative parts of the country, which explains why the divorce rate is so much higher down there than in the “immoral” East Coast).
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:53
That’s the true shorter.
Then the day is MINE!
Ted the Slacker said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:53
Really very much shorter Douthat:
The difference between us and them is buttsecks
Gary Ruppert said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:55
The fact is, you liberals are wrong and he is right — which is usual. The gay marriage is a slippery slope toward collapse of USA civilisation, and we must stop it before it leads to are distruction.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:58
Gay marriage with a well-oiled Chinese guy would involve a slippery slope, I’ll grant that much.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:58
I’m all for cereal monogamy, because who really wants their Fruit Loops playing with their Cheerios, but…
lifelong heterosexual monogamy at its best can offer something distinctive and remarkable — a microcosm of civilization, and an organic connection between human generations
This is true, in the sense that many bad marriages include variations on the classic master/slave, lord/serf, and colonizer/colonized relationships of civilization.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:59
Opposite marriage is indeed a microcosm [sic] of civilization, beginning as it does with the first plowing of fields, and ending with either space travel or nuclear war.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:02
If my first marriage had included the invention of beer, one of the highlights of human history, I might somehow have endured it.
But hey — the real slippery slope is letting people REMARRY. I say only one wedding per lifetime.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:03
A Vietnamese guy, sorry. Subtle racism there, conflating the chinks and the zipperheads.
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:03
One word description of Douche’s debate style: prancing.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:05
I say only one wedding per lifetime.
How about: as many marriages in one lifetime as you want, but only one divorce. You have to live with all the other mistakes.
“Harcourt FENTON MUDD!”
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:05
Privilege? I’m guessing privilege, Russ.
Ohhhhh. I really thought it was privilege. Dammit!
El Cid said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:06
Has anyone encountered yet a marriage / family which resembled a “microcosm of civilization”?
‘Cause I haven’t.
I mean, at least, not a civilization past the hunter gatherer / pastoralist phase.
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:07
Menage. He actually used the word “menage.” This may put a different spin on the Chunky Reese Witherspoon story….
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:08
I’ve encountered marriages that made it as far into civilization as trebuchets battering down the castle keep.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:08
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 16:52
Conservatives just want everyone to be as miserable and repressed as they are. What’s wrong with that???
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:09
Furries are interested in menageries à trois.
Ted the Slacker said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:09
Has anyone encountered yet a marriage / family which resembled a “microcosm of civilization”?
The Simpsons?
Marco said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:09
Thank God we gays don’t have to subjected to Ross’ superior opposite marriage on video or anything. Ew.
Ross "I always" Douthat said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:10
But I AM special I AM I AM IAM LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEE
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:11
I’ve encountered marriages that made it as far into civilization as trebuchets battering down the castle keep.
I don’t know what that means, but it sounds hot.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:12
Also, can I just say that it always fucks with my head when I remember that Douthat is less than a year older than I am??? It’s that hard Catholic livin’, I guess.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:14
My first marriage made it as far as the Spanish Inquisition.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:15
Which I didn’t expect, but then I guess nobody expects — [SFX door opens, whoosh]
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:15
Wow. I had no idea he was that young.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:16
Wow. I had no idea he was that young.
So young, so stupid, so repressed.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:16
Wow. I had no idea he was that young.
Kind of depressing on a variety of levels, no?
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:22
Young, dumb, full of himself.
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:23
If you get my drift and I think you do.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:24
If you get my drift and I think you do.
I was about to say that I see what you did there.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:25
Mae West: I used to be snow white but then I drifted.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:25
Kind of depressing on a variety of levels, no?
Mostly it is depressing to know that a major newspaper pays him to write this ignorant crap, when any one of us could crap out a couple thousand words of more intelligent commentary in our sleep. And yet this amateur anchorite gets national press for being what amounts to a professional killjoy.
Spengler Dampniche said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:25
He’ll be behind the firewall, right? I never thought I’d welcome the demise of the NYT, but it’s gone so horribly wrong.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:28
Slippery trope:
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:29
I’mma gonna build a time machine and travel into the past and tell 8-year-old T&U to dream of writing right-wing drivel instead of fiction. There has to be more money in it, at least.
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:31
Is Douthat married? Seems a certain ASW editor and he would be………..aw, nevermind. Forgot K-Lo is saving herself for the return of The One.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:31
dream of writing right-wing drivel instead of fiction.
There’s a difference?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:32
Of course, 8-year-old T&U would be all like, “Why the fuck would I want to write for those motherfuckers?” Only, you know, without so many curse words.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:32
I would get very tired worrying about other peoples’ relationships so much.
Froley said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:33
Ross, Sid Meier on line one.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:34
There’s a difference?
Fiction has too many vegetables.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:34
dream of writing right-wing drivel instead of fiction.
There’s a difference?
Not in the horror genre, no. Otherwise, fiction tends to have some entertainment value beyond the natural tendency of humans to stop and stare at gory car accidents.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:36
I would get very tired worrying about other peoples’ relationships so much.
This is what happens when you don’t allow yourself to have perfectly healthy sexual fantasies.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:43
Fine. I didn’t want to talk to you people, either.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:43
This is what happens when you don’t allow yourself to have perfectly healthy sexual fantasies.
And embrace your own sexuality as part of being human (you know, in God’s image and all…).
Pretty sure giving other people space for the pursuit of happiness would be in keeping with “Traditional” “American” “Values” ™
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:46
Pretty sure giving
other peoplewhite straight dudes space for the pursuit of happiness would be in keeping with “Traditional” “American” “Values” ™FTFY.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:46
Fine. I didn’t want to talk to you people, either.
Relax T&U, you just inspired everyone to take some time and enjoy a perfectly healthy sexual fantasy.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:48
Relax T&U, you just inspired everyone to take some time and enjoy a perfectly healthy sexual fantasy.
That’s *always* happening around me!
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:50
That’s *always* happening around me!
That reminds me, could you post some pictures of yourself so
myActor212′s fantasies are more accurate?N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:52
Zombie 4chan: show us yur braaaaanes
Xecky Gilchrist said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:52
dream of writing right-wing drivel instead of fiction.
Terry Goodkind has made a decent living at a combination of the two.
El Cid said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:55
I just had lunch, and my Western sandwich lunch made me notice what a microcosm of the last several hundred years of Western lunch dining. The Asian model of rice bowl lunches would interrupt nearly 350 years of lunch stability.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:58
That reminds me, could you post some pictures of yourself so my Actor212?s fantasies are more accurate?
Sure!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 17:58
Terry Goodkind has made a decent living at a combination of the two.
Oh, god, even I have more dignity than that.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:03
Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™
If you increase the denominator, you decrease the percentage, so I would think Douthat would support including gay marriages, since it would cover up his sinning friends better.
Plus, it would double his chances of landing a spouse.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:04
That reminds me, could you post some pictures of yourself so my Actor212?s fantasies are more accurate?
I don’t need them, I live in her head already.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:06
I don’t need them, I live in her head already.
That reminds me, could you please dust behind the bookcase? I think I saw a dustbunny back there.
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:06
Plus, it would double his chances of landing a spouse.
According to his wiki entry (I actually looked him up after reading this shit this morning) he’s been married since 2007… The mere thought sends a frisson of horror up my spine.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:08
could you please dust behind the bookcase? I think I saw a dustbunny back there.
The lease didn’t say anything about no pets.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:09
According to his wiki entry (I actually looked him up after reading this shit this morning) he’s been married since 2007
Honey, that’s his other beard.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:10
According to his wiki entry (I actually looked him up after reading this shit this morning) he’s been married since 2007
A devout Catholic, married for three years but without three children? I smell an apostate.
jim said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:11
*sighs, jumps out of boat to investigate alleged mango-patch*
Oh fucking my … yep, looks like I picked the wrong week to quit huffing Nilodor™.
if we just accept this shift, we’re giving up on one of the great ideas of Western civilization: the celebration of lifelong heterosexual monogamy as a unique and indispensable estate
Never you mind that this gem is just as full of it as the other nonsense he concedes in the opening paragraphs – so full of it, in fact, that even the shysters who made the recent babyshit Hail Mary defense case for Prop 8 wouldn’t directly run with that stinker because it’s logically identical to arguing that increasing the population of an endangered species will render it extinct … FOR THE GREAT & MIGHTIE WIZZURD OF BUNKUM HAS SPOEKN!
But then suddenly to almost noone’s surprise the mightie Wizzurd Of Bunkum was mind-raeped in teh comments via Interwebz ninjas using massively superior IQs & then everyone laughed & went over the hills & far away to a huge magical orgy THE END.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:14
Interwebz ninjas using massively superior IQs
DUDE!
I’m going to have to ask you to stop attending our ninja meetings.
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:15
This is true, in the sense that many bad marriages include variations on the classic master/slave, lord/serf, and colonizer/colonized relationships of civilization.
Yeah, but that’s not necessarily exclusive to hetero-monogamy. Personally, I don’t dispute his contention that relationships can be seen as microcosms of the civilizations in which they exist, which seems to me to be a rather “well DUH, no fucking kidding” statement, but I deny absolutely that that’s ONLY true of hetero-monogamous relationships.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:16
This is true, in the sense that many bad marriages include variations on the classic master/slave, lord/serf, and colonizer/colonized relationships of civilization.
And some AWESOME marriages are based on those.
stryx said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:16
a combination of the two.
Cutting Taxes increases Revenues!
The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him!
al Gore!
How do you tell the difference?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:18
Yeah, but that’s not necessarily exclusive to hetero-monogamy.
Yeah, I mean, we recreate hierarchies wherever we go, whether we mean to or not. EVERYBODY does this, and unless you’re on guard against it in your own life, it’s going to happen in your personal relationships.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:23
Yeah, I mean, we recreate hierarchies wherever we go, whether we mean to or not. EVERYBODY does this, and unless you’re on guard against it in your own life, it’s going to happen in your personal relationships.
Spoken like an unterfrau. No, wait…
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:24
Sure!
T&U, I didn’t realize you were a furry.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:30
T&U, I didn’t realize you were a furry.
I’m not, but I figured I’d stop trying to dispel the rumors. Plus, according to N__B, that’s what I look like. Asking nicely, anyway.
Bitter Scribe said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:37
He just takes an entire column to say, “It’s not marriage because queers can’t have kids.”
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:45
He just takes an entire column to say, “It’s not marriage because queers can’t have kids.”
Which makes this actually meatier than most of his columns.
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:46
A devout Catholic, married for three years but without three children? I smell an apostate.
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
And, in a bit of delightful synchronicity, Bitter Scribe comes along and say
He just takes an entire column to say, “It’s not marriage because queers can’t have kids.”
I love this place.
Status: Single said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:52
Douthat should go eat a tailpipe.
He wouldn’t know “unique & indispensible” from a hole in his dick if he was their love-child.
Would the back of a well-directed hand applied enthusiastically to his bloated fuzzy face get him to trade in his thundering mush-mouthed oracular rhetorical style for a clue?
It would be unreasonable NOT to experiment.
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:53
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
I guess it’s a microcosm of late Easter Island civilization.
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:53
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
Is that Douchehat-speak for “My wife won’t let me anywhere near her?” I mean, what self-respecting woman would…
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:54
I guess it’s a microcosm of late Easter Island civilization.
With fewer erections.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:55
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
I guess it’s a microcosm of late Easter Island civilization.
You mean, these heads are wearing DoucheHats: http://otwarte.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/ancient-mystery-of-Easter-Island.jpg
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:57
I mean, what self-respecting woman would…
Well, there’s the problem right there.
Apathetic Soulless NORP #2 089 433 977 said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:57
Hey! Knock it off! I thought that article was GREAT!
Jennifer said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:00
But if we just accept this shift, we’re giving up on one of the great ideas of Western civilization: the celebration of lifelong heterosexual monogamy as a unique and indispensable estate. That ideal is still worth honoring, and still worth striving to preserve. And preserving it ultimately requires some public acknowledgment that heterosexual unions and gay relationships are different: similar in emotional commitment, but distinct both in their challenges and their potential fruit.
You gotta wonder if this dork ever took Western Civ 101. This “great idea” of Western civilization included the female house slaves (wives) of Democratic Greece, who stayed home and tended the hearth while their husbands cavorted with young men; the plural wives of the Hebrews, the marriages of alliance in Rome and later, in all European monarchies – many of which were not “lifelong” and most of which were not “monagamous”. In other words, neither all that “unique” nor “indispensible” if you belonged to a particular class. The peasants tended to stay married, because they couldn’t afford not to and because the church wouldn’t let them separate, not because of some “great idea of Western civilization.”
As for …ultimately requires some public acknowledgement that heterosexual unions….(are) distinct in … their potential fruit,, gee, thanks, Ross. It’s not like us fucking morons can grasp that only people of opposite sexes can procreate – we need you to conduct a goddamned public education campaign about it?
Fucking intercourse…how does it work?
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:01
Fucking
intercoursefucking…how does it work?Fiqqst for more fuckingness.
A freeper said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:03
When fascism comes to America it will be carrying a glitter covered swastika and wrapped in a rainbow flag.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:03
Fiqqst for more fuckingness.
There’s no such thing as too much fuckingness!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:04
When fascism comes to America it will be carrying a glitter covered swastika and wrapped in a rainbow flag.
Someone add “prancing” to this in a clever manner…I’m coming up short…
jim said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:05
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
Marriage as the microcosm of a cargo-cult.
“If you really truly love me, you’ll strap these coconuts to your head & join me in our sacred radio-shack so that together we may make the glorious silver birds of plenty return!”
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:05
the plural wives of the Hebrews
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! This is the new sooper sekrit BRAVO reality show: “The Real Housewiveses of Israel”
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:06
And preserving it ultimately requires some public acknowledgment that heterosexual unions and gay relationships are different: similar in emotional commitment, but distinct both in their challenges and their potential fruit.
The poor boy just couldn’t help himself; he had to throw a homophobic smear in there.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:07
When fascism comes mincing to America it will be carrying a glitter covered swastika and wrapped in a rainbow flag.
Look, if you’re going to parody a freeper, you need to go whole hog.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:08
join me in our sacred radio-shack
First Church of Tandy
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:11
First Church of Tandy
I thought momentarily that this was some sort of cryptic reference to Batteries Not Included. I am slightly disappointed that it is not.
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:12
…..and wrapped in a fabulous rainbow flag.
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:17
And preserving it ultimately requires some public acknowledgment that heterosexual unions and gay relationships are different: similar in emotional commitment, but distinct both in their challenges and their potential fruits.
Well duh.
btw, that was a direct quote from freeperville.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:21
“If you really truly love me, you’ll strap these coconuts to your head & join me in our sacred radio-shack so that together we may make the glorious silver birds of plenty return!”
The lack of respect shown here to the deeply held beliefs of a very devout people is shocking. Sure, I am an atheist now, but I was brought up in the Road Belong Cargo (Wisconsin Synod)*, and when John Frum returns you guys are going to be sorry.
*Ok for real I was raised Lutheran, but I always thought being raised Cargo Cult sounded like more fun.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:23
I wanted to join a cargo cult but I don’t like the pants.
H. Rumbold, Master Barber said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:23
Well, class, you see we take this bar magnet and one end is labeled ‘N’ and the other end is labeled ‘S’. And we put this sheet of paper over it and sprinkle on some iron filings and see how they line up. Next we take this other bar magnet and hang it up by a string tied around its middle and as we bring the two ‘N’ ends together and we see how they repel each other while the ‘N’ and the ‘S’ attract- and nine months later a beautiful little baby bar magnet will be born. so you see, class, maglev trains are the work of the devil because they work by the unnatural repulsion of two faggy ‘N’ ends.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:25
You gotta wonder if this dork ever took Western Civ 101.
One of the most baffling mysteries about wingnuts is how they can make it all the way through college and still manage to hang on to their own whitewashed version of history, and pine away for those old days as if they were somehow better. I supposed egocentrism trumps knowledge and fact based examination. Sadly, it leads to justifying outright hostile oppression with claims of tradition despite the fact that their view of tradition is one of unicorns and sparkly ponies, and completely irrelevant to the discussion at hand.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:28
However, Douchehat is a rare example. He is actually able to sympathize with a cult that fosters a culture of child rape. Education, it seems, does little to empower the mind of a fucking sociopath.
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:29
so you see, class, maglev trains are the work of the devil because they work by the unnatural repulsion of two faggy ‘N’ ends
Okay, this made me howl…
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:32
However, Douchehat is a rare example. He is actually able to sympathize with a cult that fosters a culture of child rape.
There’s nothing quite so single-midedly focused as a convert. This sect that I joned MUST be right in every particular…
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:33
*Ok for real I was raised Lutheran, but I always thought being raised Cargo Cult sounded like more fun.
I was raised in the wild by Clutch Cargo, if that means anything. He has a purty mouf
Angry Geometer said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:37
And preserving it ultimately requires some public acknowledgment that heterosexual unions and gay relationships are different: similar in emotional commitment, but distinct both in their challenges and their potential fruit.
HA HA HA HA he said “fruit”. Also, fuck that guy in everything but the literal sense.
lifelong heterosexual monogamy at its best can offer something distinctive and remarkable — a microcosm of civilization, and an organic connection between human generations — that makes it worthy of distinctive recognition and support.
At its worst, it can offer decades of miserably “staying together for the kids”, waiting for the other person to die.
Also, a microcosm of civilization? WTF? Did Douthat just have to read Faust for 11th grade English class or just pick up the Cliff’s Notes for Hobbes’ Leviathan some shit? No, it’s not a microcosm, you dumbfuck. Our civilization did not come from Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty having sex together.
Also also, “organic connection between human generations” — what does that even mean? Nobody has any gay uncles? Gay couples that raise kids have no interest in being grandparents? I have no idea what on earth that could possibly mean.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:38
Also also, “organic connection between human generations” — what does that even mean?
Stewing and eating your parents when they’re too old to profitably labor.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:41
At its worst, it can offer decades of miserably “staying together for the kids”, waiting for the other person to die.
Also, a microcosm of civilization?
Actually, this is a pretty good synopsis of most of history.
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:42
He has a purty mouf
Purty creepy, you mean.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:42
Also also, “organic connection between human generations” — what does that even mean?
I think it means to be tied to your parents and grandparents with plastic cords rather than iron shackles
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:44
Our civilization did not come from Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty having sex together.
I hope not. That baby would be half-French!
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:45
No, he said “organic.” Maybe a hemp rope?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:45
Purty creepy, you mean.
Oh, god, is that the creepy cartoon where they just film people’s mouths talking instead of animating them? I agree–CREEPY.
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:46
“Our civilization did not come from Uncle Sam and Lady Liberty having sex together”
Man, that Uncle Sam will fuck anything.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:47
Also also, “organic connection between human generations” — what does that even mean?
I suspect it means Douthat once heard somebody say, “The nuclear family is the building block of civilization!”, internalized it without thinking about or studying it, and is now willing to use any argument, no matter how flimsy, in support.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:48
Stewing and eating your parents in local, grassfed beef stock when they’re too old to profitably labor.
Fixed for more organicyness!
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:50
Stewing and eating your parents in local, grassfed beef stock when they’re too old to profitably labor.
Fixed for more organicyness!
I thought that, in Real America™, parents are grassfed beef stock.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:52
Soylent Green is family.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:54
Soylent Green was the name of my hockey team 1985-6.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:55
I thought that, in Real America™, parents are grassfed beef stock.
Wait, are you saying Real Americans (TM too lazy to bother) are cattle?
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:57
Wait, are you saying Real Americans (TM too lazy to bother) are cattle?
You don’t have to be a cow to eat grass. Just to digest it.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:58
GQ: Woman claims to have been kidnapped by Rand Paul, forced to take bong hits
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 19:58
I though Real Americans were sheeple…
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:00
How come nobody’s ever tried to force me to take bong hits? NOT FAIR.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:02
Soylent Green was the name of my hockey team 1985-6.
So you’re saying that when pressed, you turned to crisp biscuits?
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:03
So you’re saying that when pressed, you turned to crisp biscuits?
I’m saying we were all wearing old pads and smelled like shamblers.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:05
I’m saying we were all wearing old pads and smelled like shamblers.
And here I thought I invented peeing my shorts to score goals.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:05
How come nobody’s ever tried to force me to take bong hits?
Valkyries are frightening. Just ask Max Payne.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:08
Valkyries are frightening. Just ask Max Payne.
Are you saying I’m like a valkyrie? What does that have to do with bong hits?
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:11
Are you saying I’m like a valkyrie?
Tall and truculent.
What does that have to do with bong hits?
Little bitty people like Rand Paul would be scared of you skewering them.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:13
Little bitty people like Rand Paul would be scared of you skewering them.
That is actually not untrue.
Mainstream Media said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:25
Heh, Rand Paul. Boys will be boys, you know. And who didn’t kidnap and threaten to drug and drown a woman in college? Oh, by the way, did you know that Michelle Obama wrote a thesis paper about communism? Very strange…
smedley said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:44
“A 1983 photo of Rand Paul (dressed in black robe and straw hat) with fellow members of the NoZe secret society he is reported to have been a member of in college (“[A] cross between Yale’s Skull & Bones and Harvard’s Lampoon”). ”
Except, at Baylor, it would be more like a cross between a Southern Baptist convention and PeeWee’s playhouse.
Anonymous said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:45
Status: Single said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:52
Douthat should go eat a tailpipe.
He wouldn’t know “unique & indispensible” from a hole in his dick if he was their love-child.
Would the back of a well-directed hand applied enthusiastically to his bloated fuzzy face get him to trade in his thundering mush-mouthed oracular rhetorical style for a clue?
It would be unreasonable NOT to experiment.
#
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:53
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
I guess it’s a microcosm of late Easter Island civilization.
#
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 18:53
He did describe his marriage as “sterile.”
Is that Douchehat-speak for “My wife won’t let me anywhere near her?” I mean, what self-respecting woman would…
__________________________________________________
LULZ.
Is this the trifecta or what.
Doctorb said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:47
Some omelets contain roasted peppers, or spinach, or even avocado! The idea of cooking eggs with some other stuff folded in is not unique to our civilization, but the Western omelet is. The diced ham, onions, and green bell peppers are what make it distinctive and remarkable, different from all other omelets in an ineffable — but intuitively true — way, written upon the hearts of all who do not make themselves deny its understanding. Or at least it was — postmodern relativist multiculturalist thinking of the last century, which famously invented the notion that “man is the measure of all things”, says to go ahead and add whatever sort of ingredients and still call it an omelet. Or worse, an “omelette” or an omuretsu, which by its nature inevitably makes the addition of herbs fines or rice, ketchup, and soy sauce a moral and legal obligation.
But the Western omelet is a microcosm of civilization, indeed of the universe, nay, of God himself, and is thus still worth honoring and still worth trying to preserve.
justme said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:51
And there’s the real crux of his soggy biscuit. The peasants need to be told what to do, and to do it, damn it. If we let all this non-Church-sanctioned shit into society, who’s going to respect the Inquisition?
He just wants to party like it’s 999.
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:51
Doctorb, that’s a lovely mash-up of that awful copypasta troll from a while back and The Pasty Little Putz. [golf claps]
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:52
But the Western omelet is a microcosm of civilization
Peppers? Got the illegal immigration covered, so check.
Onions? For the folks on the right who make us tear up in rage, so check.
Ham? For Rush Limbaugh, so check.
And eggs.
Eggs are theft.
justme said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:53
OT, but… Everything old is new again.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:55
You guuuuuuuuuuuuuys my drawer is stuck again!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:56
*phew* A little wiggling and it’s fine now. Fucking lipgloss, always getting stuck up in there…
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 20:57
Fucking drawers, how do they work?
;)
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:01
Fucking drawers, how do they work?
Well, usually I like to hook my thumbs in her elastic, but sometimes I’ll use my tongue…
justme said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:02
*sipping tea*
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:05
I was afraid I was going to have to call the maintenance guy to grease it up and pull it out AGAIN.
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:07
Actor must be pretty close to his happy ending about now.
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:09
Wow, I just read that thing on Rand Paultard. Stick a fork, he’s done yadda yadda…
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:10
I was afraid I was going to have to call the maintenance guy to grease it up and pull it out AGAIN.
Oh, come on, now you’re just doing it on purpose.
Whale Chowder said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:10
Didn’t get out of the boat but it doesn’t matter anyway, I’ve heard it before. Honestly, these anti-gay-marriage people are just like the stereotypical American abroad who, when the local doesn’t understand what they’re saying in English, repeat it louder and slower because then the Savages will get it!
Color me sick-to-death of the “marriage is only for procreation” crappy argument.
Whale Chowder said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:11
Oh, come on, now you’re just doing it on purpose.
YA THINK?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:16
Oh, come on, now you’re just doing it on purpose.
“Now”?
Angry Geometer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:16
Come on people, let’s be fair to the man. He very well could be addicted to Vicodin and just be a high functioning addict.
and an organic connection between human generations
Like the connection between a priest and an altar boy? I for one would be in favor of fewer organ-based connections between human generations.
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:18
Didn’t get out of the boat but it doesn’t matter anyway, I’ve heard it before. Honestly, these anti-gay-marriage people are just like the stereotypical American abroad who, when the local doesn’t understand what they’re saying in English, repeat it louder and slower because then the Savages will get it!
“Where is the bathroom?”
“???”
“… you know, THE BATHROOM!?!”
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:18
You’re considering Dout-hat “high functioning”?
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:19
Altar boys are only organic if you compost them.
BrianX said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:19
You know, just a thought… if Ross wants to reduce the divorce rate, he can always find more chunky Reese Witherspoons to humiliate. Lower their self-esteem enough, they’ll forget they have awesome racks that look great in pink pajamas and never stray again.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:20
“Where is the bathroom?”
“???”
“… you know, THE BATHROOM!?!”
“THE! BATH! ROOM!”
Marion in Savannah said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:23
“Where is the bathroom?”
“???”
“… you know, THE BATHROOM!?!”
“THE! BATH! ROOM!”
Mimes taking a dump.
Willy said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:27
Would the back of a well-directed hand applied enthusiastically to his bloated fuzzy face get him to trade in his thundering mush-mouthed oracular rhetorical style for a clue?
It would be unreasonable NOT to experiment.
A good experiment has multiple trials.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:27
Poor Chunky Reese. Do you think she knows who she is? I hope she has succeeded in life on a scale that Douthat cannot imagine and only thinks of him now to be grateful she dodged that bullet.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:29
Fucking lipgloss, always getting stuck up in there…
You should go the full Palin and get lip tats. No more gloss required.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:30
Just out of curiosity, where does the “chunky Reese Witherspoon” thing come from? I am not aware.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:30
Poor Chunky Reese. Do you think she knows who she is?
Given the distortion with which Douchhat sees the world, we don’t actually know that she’s chunky or resembles Reese. It may be that he sees boobs and thinks “fat.”
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:30
Mimes taking a dump
Oh! La guerre o remorqueur est là-bas. Bonjour!
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:31
where does the “chunky Reese Witherspoon” thing come from?
Ben and Jerry’s House of Terror.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:31
VS,
Google is your friend:
http://tbogg.firedoglake.com/2009/03/16/worst-penthouse-letter-to-the-editor-ever/
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:33
where does the “chunky Reese Witherspoon” thing come from?
Ben and Jerry’s House of Terror.
Right next to Walnuts McCandyCain and Oleo Orleans.
M. Bouffant said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:33
Hey, aren’t we VS’s “friends” too? Jeeze, help a sister out.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:35
Hey, aren’t we VS’s “friends” too?
Depends.
How big a tipper are you?
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:37
high functioning addict.
High? Yes.
Functioning? Not so much.
Smut Clyde said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:38
These days, the ability to perform elaborate mental gymnastics is a pre-requisite for a professional catholic apologist.
Fortunately his current argument lends itself to many contexts: “Anything corrupt in the church hierarchy is really the fault of the Buddhists. Rather than reality, let’s focus on the aspirations embodied in Catholicism, the institution it could be if only the priests weren’t molesting children.”
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:39
Gawd, I had forgotten about that. “I was supposed to be excited, but I was bored”. There’s a really big clue in there.
Anonymous said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:39
http://delong.typepad.com/sdj/2009/03/fear-of-reese-witherspoon-look-alikes-on-the-pill.html
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:39
You should go the full Palin and get lip tats. No more gloss required
Just what kind of skank do you take me for?!
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:40
A good experiment has multiple trials.
I think Rossey has had enough trials. Score = FAIL.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:40
Sounds like chunky Reese is lot more than douchehat deserves. Who is he turn down a chunky cute girl ?
Anonymous said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:41
You guys have that bookmarked don’t ya.
Damnit!
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:42
These days, the ability to perform elaborate mental gymnastics is a pre-requisite for a professional catholic apologist.
Dout-hat’s problem is not only is his degree of difficulty low, but he never nails the dismount.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:43
Just what kind of skank do you take me for?!
First class!
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:43
Dout-hat’s problem is not only is his degree of difficulty low, but he never nails the dismount.
He did with Chunky Reese.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:43
They’re liberals. They have to BOOKMARK IT
Angry Geometer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:44
a chunkier Reese Witherspoon drunkenly masticating my neck and cheeks
Dickhead.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:44
Fortunately his current argument lends itself to many contexts: “Anything corrupt in the church hierarchy is really the fault of the Buddhists. Rather than reality, let’s focus on the aspirations embodied in Catholicism, the institution it could be if only the priests weren’t molesting children.”
Hm. Yeah. Let’s focus on the brilliant writer the Douth could be if he weren’t completely detached from reality and living in magic unicorn world. I guess it takes an institutional dumbshit to be a paid apologist for a dumbshit institution.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:45
He did with Chunky Reese.
He didn’t so much nail the dismount as fall off her.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:46
First class!
Damn straight.
Wait, is that good or bad?
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:46
Who is he turn down a chunky cute girl ?
Who am I to actually keep the world record fish I caught yesterday? I threw it back and it’s totally the truth.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:48
Dickhead.
Does anything else need to be said?
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:48
“Who am I to actually keep the world record fish I caught yesterday? I threw it back and it’s totally the truth.”
I’m skeptimacal.
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:48
Who is he turn down a chunky cute girl ?
A sexually confused and repressed egotistical religious freak? Just spitballing here…
N__B said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:48
Dickhead.
Does anything else need to be said?
Dickhead wearing a DoucheHat.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:50
“Who is he turn down a chunky cute girl ?
A sexually confused and repressed egotistical religious freak? Just spitballing here…”
There’s you’re problem. I don’t like spitballing on the first date.
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:51
He didn’t so much nail the dismount as fall off her.
Ross Douthat: trying to make whiskey dick sound like a principled refusal since 2007*.
*or whenever that column ran, I don’t care enough to look it up.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:52
Who is he turn down a chunky cute girl ?
Brad Delong (thanks, Anon, I hadn’t read that one) posits that he didn’t turn her down for looks, but for the fact she took control of getting pregnant.
And that got me to thinking: a lot of unwanted pregnancies may not be so unwanted after all.
Look, a man knows the risks going into unprotected sex with an opposite, pregnancy being a lot higher on the list than an STD. Yet, many men (perhaps most) wouldn’t bother using a condom or finding out of their partner is on some form of contraception. No man has sex without this knowledge in the back of his head, if he has any kind of education.
So he’s rolling the dice, figuring he won’t crap out. Here’s the thing, tho: I wonder if it’s possible, in some cases, for the guy to say “fuck it, I’m going in unwrapped” figuring he wants the girl to get pregnant so he’s forced to marry her.
Think about it: it’s not that big a stretch to see some guy sitting at home on a Friday night, getting nagged by his parents (I mean, you know, you’re in your twenties and you still live at home), and feeling trapped because he has responsibilities around the house, to see him head out and get laid not because he needs to vent (altho that’s there) but almost hoping the girl gets knocked up to force him out of his home.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 21:54
“Brad Delong (thanks, Anon, I hadn’t read that one) posits that he didn’t turn her down for looks, but for the fact she took control of getting pregnant.
”
THATS disturbing.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:00
THATS disturbing.
Note that no matter how uncomfortable the entire experience made him feel (and I’m not saying he was wrong to feel uncomfortable and awkward about it) it wasn’t until she mentioned the Pill that he walks out.
He was willing to go the distance with her, however grudgingly he claims it would have been, until that moment.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:03
Holy crap. You nailed it.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:03
THATS disturbing.
I think it’s pretty clear from the story. It was finding out she was on the Pill that made him stop.
His problem was either (1) she wanted to or (2) she was using oral contraceptives. Either way, Douthat doesn’t come away looking very good.
Although, at the risk of sounding like a concern troll, my conscience does nag at me in one respect. If we reverse the genders, it’s a routine story of a young woman saying “No” after the drunken frat boy who’s been groping at her for a while says, “Don’t worry, Baby, I have a condom in my wallet.” I imagine many young women have such a story, and we typically don’t fault with them for it.
Of course, most of them don’t write these stories in the New York Times as evidence of their piety, so there’s that.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:09
http://delong.typepad.com/sdj/2009/03/fear-of-reese-witherspoon-look-alikes-on-the-pill.html
…of heterosexuality?
Ross has a limp…wrist, people, wrist.
Smut Clyde said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:09
Are you saying I’m like a valkyrie? What does that have to do with bong hits?
Artist’s impression
Artist’s impression #2
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:09
Of course, most of them don’t write these stories in the New York Times as evidence of their piety, so there’s that.
Here’s the difference. I mean, you’re right that if you posit a reverse situation, we’d have a different opinion, but objectively Dout-hat admits he probably would have fucked her anyway up to that point.
But here’s the difference: Dout-Hat goes out of his way to identify the girl to anyone who knows both of them. In other words, he’s bragging about a) having this girl in a compromising position and b) having turned her down.
So he exploits this poor girl’s passion and lust to score a cheap moral point, one that gets tainted by the premise that he would have fucked her anyway if she hadn’t been on the Pill.
I’m betting large money he didn’t have a condom with him.
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:11
Gawd, I had forgotten about that. “I was supposed to be excited, but I was bored”. There’s a really big clue in there.
Also in the fact that he was turned off by her boobs.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:12
Think about it: it’s not that big a stretch to see some guy sitting at home on a Friday night, getting nagged by his parents (I mean, you know, you’re in your twenties and you still live at home), and feeling trapped because he has responsibilities around the house, to see him head out and get laid not because he needs to vent (altho that’s there) but almost hoping the girl gets knocked up to force him out of his home.
Besides the last part about impregnating some poor girl to get me out of the house, it would seem that Actor has hidden cameras in my home. I may never sleep again.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:13
it would seem that Actor has hidden cameras in my home.
By the way, lime green sheets do not flatter your complexion.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:13
Also in the fact that he was turned off by her boobs.
“Boobs are icky.” -Ross Douthat’s Harvard University yearbook quote.
Smut Clyde said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:15
The diced ham, onions, and green bell peppers are what make it distinctive and remarkable, different from all other omelets in an ineffable — but intuitively true — way, written upon the hearts of all who do not make themselves deny its understanding.
Has to be specifically Danish ham… the acme — the royalty, even — of Nordic agriculture. There is no substitute.
Otherwise it would be omelette without the Prince of Denmark.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:17
With people like Newt Gingrich and Ross Douthate in prominent public position I would have had a mental breakdown years ago if it weren’t for the Black Keys. Music cures the soul. But, only if you have one (talking to you Newt).
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:18
lime green sheets do not flatter your complexion.
YOU LIE!
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:20
Hm. In twenty minutes east coast time, it will be 05:06:07 08/09/10
LittlePig said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:20
N__B for the win.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:20
YOU LIE!
Yes. Perhaps I need to calibrate my monitor…
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:21
Nice to meet another Black Keys fan.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:21
FTW
77south said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:22
Hm. In twenty minutes east coast time, it will be 05:06:07 08/09/10
This calls for decisive action to commemorate this numeric oddity. 420?
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:23
Nice to meet another Black Keys fan.
This calls for decisive action to commemorate this numeric oddity. 420?
Likewise.
LittlePig said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:24
The part that gets me is how low the New York TImes has gone. They get a severely neurotic man that writes at 8th grade level a damn column, knowing he’s too stupid to realize he’s just hit bait. That’s carny crap, O Newspaper Of Record.
The P.T. Barnam Times, more like.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:27
Aren’t NY Times columnists supposed to have a way with the language?
That thing that he has with it could be called “a way.”
BrianX said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:28
Lurking Canadian:
If he wasn’t interested, he wasn’t interested, and that’s fine. But the idiot is coming out and bragging about turning down someone who most men (at least those that aren’t hyper-fatphobic) likely would not turn down unless she was a truly nasty person, and claiming it was because she was using contraception AND taking the sexual initiative.
In other words, there was no reason to tell the story at all except to get across the impression of being a smug, moralistic asshole. (Or a closet case. Or just too-dumb-to-live indiscreet.)
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:28
The P.T. Barnam Times, more like.
You masticated the hell out of em!
Wait.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:28
“I love to go swimmin’ with bow-legged women and become bored and somewhat disgusted with myself, with her, with the whole business…”
S. cerevisiae said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:28
420?
I’ll join you!
And Douchehat really deserves a swirly.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:29
That thing that he has with it could be called “a way.”
Just like a married brute having “a way” with his wife that leaves her groaning in agony while he rolls off and falls asleep.
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:30
On the Delusion Scale where does Douthat land?
And how about This guy?
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:32
“My throat was dry from too much vodka, and her breasts, spilling out of pink pajamas, threatened my ability to.”
Ahhhhhhhhhh, a clue. Poor l’il Ross was so numbed, big Ross thought he wouldn’t get wood, so he found an excuse…
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:32
Zion man is now ‘One Nation Under God’
Only slightly better than “Zion Man.”
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:33
Just like a married brute having “a way” with his
wifehusband that leavesherhim groaning in agony while he rolls off and falls asleep.Fixed!
Esteev said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:34
Only slightly better than “Zion Man.”
I assume he’s BIG Bob Marley fan.
Chris said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:37
The part that gets me is how low the New York TImes has gone. They get a severely neurotic man that writes at 8th grade level a damn column, knowing he’s too stupid to realize he’s just hit bait. That’s carny crap, O Newspaper Of Record.
And it’s supposed to be “liberal,” too.
BrianX said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:42
Chris:
I’ve always found the idea of the NYT being liberal rather amusing, given that it was always supposedly the newspaper of stuffy pseudo-intellectual conservatives.
actor212 said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:44
Antonin Scalia falls down drunk
Smut Clyde said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:46
how low the New York TImes has gone. They get a severely neurotic man that writes at 8th grade level a damn column
They are paying a writer who has appointed himself as an apologist for an obsolete empire of authoritarians, seemingly unaware that the empire in question has a perfectly good propaganda office of its own (i.e. they could be paying the newspaper to print their attempts to rationalise points of dogma).
mycroft said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:55
As so often happens, Greenwald takes Douchehat seriously/eviscerates him so nobody else has to: http://www.salon.com/news/opinion/glenn_greenwald/2010/08/09/marriage/index.html
tigris said,
August 9, 2010 at 22:56
Antonin Scalia falls down drunk
I prefer to believe God shoved him. The concomitant passing of a bus would make it certain.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:03
I prefer to believe God shoved him
Next time I hope God yanks his slacks down around his ankles. Motherfucker is lucky he doesn’t fit in a locker.
Johnny Pez said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:05
I’ve never dared to read Douchehat’s “chunky Reese Witherspoon” piece, but I’ve been told that it’s much more entertaining when read in a Rorschach voice.
tsam said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:07
I’ve never dared to read Douchehat’s “chunky Reese Witherspoon” piece,
Do it. It’s hilarious. Another “Don’t tease the panther” opus. Few people capture and convey depravity and sexual dysfunction like Le Douche.
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:16
“Antonin Scalia falls down drunk”
He’s imagining the rest of his judicial career being spent with three woman on the bench with him. That’s what he became a justice to *avoid*. I expect we’ll find Clarence Thomas in a bathtub with his wrists slit next.
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:17
“Women”, dammit spell check, can’t you correct for grammar too?
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:24
FYWP. can someone shorter the Scalia thing for me? I’m not getting off the boat.
Whale Chowder said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:26
Scalia goes to restaurant, leaves, falls down.
Reporter gets wind of the story, publishes.
Scalia reported “fine.”
The End.
Whale Chowder said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:27
Now, if it’d been Cheney, and given his history, the story could have been: “Ex VP Goes to Restaurant, Eats, Shoots and Leaves.”
That is, if you wanted to imagine Cheney as a panda furry.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:44
I dunno. I think it might have partly been that he thought maybe she was a good girl and was just putting out for him, but totally turned out to be a Slutty McSlutterson.
noen said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:44
“That is, if you wanted to imagine Cheney as a panda furry.”
DO NOT WANT!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:45
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
I just threw up in my cat’s mouth.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:47
Artist’s impression #2
If I squint, that one could *sort of* be me…
Whale Chowder said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:52
I just threw up in my cat’s mouth.
How she got into her cat’s mouth I’ll never know.
vacuumslayer said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:57
Slutty McSlutterson is my mother. That woman is a saint.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 9, 2010 at 23:58
Slutty McSlutterson is my mother. That woman is a saint.
DKW is your brother???
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:00
Oh shit. Things just got incestuous up in here.
Whale Chowder said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:03
Things just got incestuous up in here.
O RLY?
Do you have something to share with the class, VS?
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:05
Do you have something to share with the class, VS?
I hope you brought a piece for everybody…
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:05
Yeah. Apparently me tsam and DKW have been in some sort of incestuous 3-way. Disturbing!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:06
I hope you brought a piece for everybody…
*cider spittake*
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:07
In a way, DKW is all of our brother, and also son.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:08
In a way, DKW is all of our brother, and also son.
But, fortunately, not in the way that involves genetics.
T&U's Cat said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:09
Needs more garlic.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:12
But, fortunately, not in the way that involves genetics.
Thank God. I was worried I had completely forgotten 9 months of my life…in a time masheen…
Whale Chowder said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:13
Needs more
garlictuna.Phyx’d for more cataliciousness.
justme said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:20
Tease.
gocart mozart said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:26
Have you seen this yet, its all over the tubes. Sarah gets fisked by a schoolteacher.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKflKzmfRCw
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 0:57
Have you seen this yet, its all over the tubes. Sarah gets fisked by a schoolteacher.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKflKzmfRCw
What a ditz.
I try not to watch too much Sarah Palin and when I do she’s usually reciting something instead of reacting. But man, WHAT A BRAINLESS DITZ. No wonder the conservative voter sees her as his type of woman.
And I love the way she finally waves at the camera after her people have been trying to block it for three minutes but evidently can’t.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:31
Have you seen this yet, its all over the tubes. Sarah gets fisked by a schoolteacher.
I love how her goons try and screen the camera out by standing in front of it. At some point, that draws a swift kick in the
shinsg’nads. That would look good on the Interons, especially if it were Todd.“Grifter.” That’s the only word for that woman.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:32
Or what Chris said. Your choice.
gocart mozart said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:33
The ultimate pawnage, the unedited “Sarkosy”/Palin interview.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JV_IphAIGPg&feature=related
gocart mozart said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:34
I think that was Todd, Bristol is the girl who interjects near the end.
paperbagmarlys said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:35
I was a bit surprised that Greenwald took Douthat seriously, or, well, was reasonably polite about pointing out that if Douthat’s IQ was 5 points lower he’d have to be watered twice daily.
***
However, this lovely Thiessen POS WaPo editorial strikes me as today’s lowest hanging fruit. Not only is Assange Satan but Obama has a crush on him. Oh, and no matter what, America has the right to nuke Assange.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/08/02/AR2010080202627_pf.html
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:45
The Glennster is too polite and easy on Douchey. Cuz he’s a fag.
Pupienus Maximus said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:53
BTW, is Tintin saying that GayPutzRiot B. Dan Blatt is addicted to Vicodin? I ask because his “argument” was (arguably?) even dumber than Douchey’s.
M. Bouffant said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:55
Dunno if anyone uses memeorandum any more …
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 10, 2010 at 1:57
However, this lovely Thiessen POS WaPo editorial strikes me as today’s lowest hanging fruit. Not only is Assange Satan but Obama has a crush on him. Oh, and no matter what, America has the right to nuke Assange.
==============================
That’s the liberal WaPoop: Any douchey thing you do, NYT, we can out-douchey you!
~
M. Bouffant said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:00
How embarrassing.
No wonder no one reads it any more. Bastards.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:05
OMG, just saw someone on FaceBook refer to Palin as a modern TR…
J— said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:10
T. Rex!
wiley said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:17
No fault divorce is great. Aside from making a lot of Hitchcock plots unintelligible it prevents a lot of life-long pain and certain deaths. This married for life and all is well fantasy is weak sauce. That anyone should be denied their civil rights because of the fantasies of twatwaffle douchebags like Douthat is unconscionable. It’s hard to believe we’re having “debates” like this.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:24
Memeorandom may bite, but I might not have seen this otherwise.
lobbey said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:33
…..he can always find more chunky Reese Witherspoons to humiliate…..
I completely missed that one….. its just wrong, on so many levels…….
Klyde said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:41
That doesn’t even come close to the stupid rantings of Martin Luther King’s idiot niece.
lobbey said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:44
If he wasn’t interested, he wasn’t interested, and that’s fine. But the idiot is coming out and bragging about turning down someone who most men (at least those that aren’t hyper-fatphobic) likely would not turn down unless she was a truly nasty person, and claiming it was because she was using contraception AND taking the sexual initiative.
Owwww…. I feel durty just reading it….. the thing that really gets me is his boasting about it in a fucken NYT column. Now I didn’t go to no journalism school, but the last thing I would repeat is one of my early 20′s drunken sexual liaisons, particularly where the other person is identifiable. Has the man no fucken shame? If this girl is real, then I hope that one day she walks up to him and kicks him very hard in the nuts. [However,something tells me it isn't real.... and if it is, it kind of proves that Ross is teh gay].
Smut Clyde said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:49
tigris said,
Memeorandom may bite, but I might not have seen this otherwise.
Harrumph.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 2:56
You might think this isn’t really much of a debate. An annual income of two hundred and fifty thousand dollars puts you in the top three per cent of American households, and is more than four times the national median. You’re rich, and a small tax increase isn’t going to rock your world.
Good luck convincing people of this, though. Judging from surveys of how Americans describe themselves, most of the privileged don’t feel all that privileged.
… and then spends the rest of that article describing how that three percent is really much more stratified than you think, and how important it is that any tax cut take that into account.
Be nice if the New Yorker wasted this much bandwidth discussing the way the other
halfnine tenthsninety seven percent lives.Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:13
discussing the way the other
halfnine tenthsninety seven percent lives.…other 97 percent… are they those poor ragamuffins who have to share one another’s polo ponies?
Linnaeus said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:17
Which no one expected, I’m sure.
Larkspur said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:19
But Chris, the “lower upper class”, who are not plentiful among us 97 per centers, are the ones with the voices, the platforms, the stupid puerile Douthat columns. And a whole hell of a lot of 97 per centers still think that if they try rilly rilly hard, they or their kids might smash their way into the lower upper class. It isn’t going to happen.
So hearing the lower upper class be all “Woe is me! Look at The Way We Live Now!” hurts all of us. This is something I want the New Yorker to “waste” bandwidth on. If there is any hope of schoolin’ the bottom 2% of the top 3%, hell, yes.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:21
Well, sure, but raising taxes on the highest will help fund government programs that help the 97 percent. I actually thought it was a great article BECAUSE the Republicans have succeeded in conflating the relatively achievable lower end(and played on the reticence of folks who think they might make it to pay higher taxes) with the ultra-wealthy upper end in a way that has prevented the wildly, unbelievably wealthy from paying their fair share.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:32
If there is any hope of schoolin’ the bottom 2% of the top 3%, hell, yes.
I’m inclined to agree, in that it’s the best we could hope for from that publication, IMO. And maybe it’s a sign that if they write something about taking the highest echelon down a peg or two, that sort of thought is becoming non-heretical.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:40
that three percent is really much more stratified than you think
No problem. Raise taxes a little bit, say 3%, on people making >$250000. Then for each further increase of $250000, raise taxes 3% more.
That takes the upper bracket stratification into account and so should make the writer happy. That the marginal tax rate would get to 100% before you get out of the noise on a Goldman-Sachs Christmas bonus is just a happy accident.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:52
It’s easier to just hold them by the ankles and shake until change falls out of their pockets.
Major Kong said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:53
I read somewhere that people tend to think somebody making twice as much as them is rich. Regardless of their income.
So the person making $250k thinks you have to make $500k to be rich.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:58
It’s easier to just hold them by the ankles and
shake until change falls out of their pocketsand then drop them off the cliff.Fecksed to what everyone really was thinking.
What?
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 3:59
But Looch, that won’t help the budget.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:01
It will if we sell them for meat.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:02
What, you can’t scrounge up the change at the bottom of the cliff?
I mean, after we sell the meat?
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:03
That reeks of effort.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:08
That reeks of effort.
You’re already shaking loose the change.
Larkspur said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:09
Cool! Because I totally reek of effort. Point me to the cliff! I do not cook or roast or barbecue, but I can pick up moolah. I can pick up moolah all day long.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:09
You’re already shaking loose the change.
All in a day’s work for a bear. But climbing down a cliff just to climb back up again? That’s what monkeys are for.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:10
I can pick up moolah all day long.
This may take a while. You probably want to at least wear a helmet or something.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:12
No law says we can’t build an elevator into the side of the cliff.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:15
No law says we can’t build an elevator into the side of the cliff.
It’s not in the Constitution, so the teabaggers won’t support it.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:16
No law says we can’t build an elevator into the side of the cliff.
But a preservation board might.
Also.
Zombee barter. Win-win, no?
(Or is that, “Nom-nom, oui?”)
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:17
Hmm, and teabaggers are pretty fatty, so they won’t fetch much.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:18
Hmm, and teabaggers are pretty fatty, so they won’t fetch much.
One word: Soap.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:18
Hmm, and teabaggers are pretty fatty, so they won’t fetch much.
I would have thought they’re too fat to do anything other than roll over and play dead.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:20
Mother of God, this (http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/110258/us-economy-is-increasingly-tied-to-the-rich) was published in the WSJ? What’s wrong with the world?
Well, no shit, Sherlock.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:22
“I don’t think it’s healthy for the economy to be so dependent on the top 2% of the income distribution,” Mr. Zandi said.
I believe we are discussing the implementation details of the solution to this problem.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:23
And to be clear: The “dropping” part is essential.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:24
One word: Soap.
Hello, what part of DIRTY fucking hippies don’t you get? Unless we can package it in ALL-ONE DILUTE DILUTE! packaging… Dr Bagger’s?
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:25
Re the above, I admit I’m going with my gut instinct when told about the plight of the top three percenters. I’m also just skeptical that the bottom two percent of those three percenters can really be broken off, just because they seem to me that they’re rich enough to be more affected by taxes than by ordinary problems like health care or education.
If the article’s conclusions are right, great – but the “goddamn liberal tax leechers” meme still seems to be going strong.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:26
I believe we are discussing the implementation details of the solution to this problem.
I prefer guillotines to dropping people off cliffs. It’s the romantic in me.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:28
N__B, I’m afraid your repeated objections have proven you to be objectively pro-aristocrat. It gives me no joy to point this out, but the dialectic requires that you will have to join them at the cliff-top, comrade.
lobbey said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:31
I prefer guillotines to dropping people off cliffs. It’s the romantic in me.
the time is coming Chris, the problem will be picking who gets theirs first….
Larkspur said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:35
Oh good night nurse, I have been stockpiling torches and pitchforks. Now we have to get certificamated on guillotines? Also, anyone can push someone. Is there no respect for the torch and the pitchfork?
Larkspur said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:39
Ooh, I give up. For tonight. I am going to my lair. Hellhounds protect me, along with them torches and pitchforks. Anyone comes for me, I will drag you straight to hell.
Good night, y’all!
Smut Clyde said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:42
Compromise. Guillotine blades at the bottom of the cliff, facing up.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:49
I’m also just skeptical that the bottom two percent of those three percenters can really be broken off, just because they seem to me that they’re rich enough to be more affected by taxes than by ordinary problems like health care or education.
I’m not… there was something I read a couple years ago, some guy had researched tax law and practice and found that people making 250-500k were paying much higher actual taxes than those over 500k because of all the specialized loopholes the super-rich had pretty much bought from Congress, dammit I wish I could remember his name. The wealthiest have already separated themselves off, and they are just as happy to throw the 2% just under them under the bus as they are the 97% under that.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 10, 2010 at 4:55
Are we going to throw them under the bus, and then drive the bus off the cliff now?
~
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:09
We could just have them stand at the bottom of the cliff, then drive the bus off the cliff so it lands on them.
And we could mount guillotine blades on the front grille of the bus.
And fuckin’ lasers! Everything’s better with lasers!
Aws said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:12
I for one welcome our buxom chunky Reese overlords.
Aws said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:12
I for one welcome our buxom chunky Reese Witherspoon overlords.
Doctorb said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:13
Worst news I’ve seen today. Scalia unhurt, indeed.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:26
Don’t worry, Doctororb.
Lightning, on a cloudless day. Sooner or later.
~
Jennifer said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:31
I prefer guillotines to dropping people off cliffs. It’s the romantic in me.
the time is coming Chris, the problem will be picking who gets theirs first….
Oh good night nurse, I have been stockpiling torches and pitchforks. Now we have to get certificamated on guillotines? Also, anyone can push someone. Is there no respect for the torch and the pitchfork?
Compromise. Guillotine blades at the bottom of the cliff, facing up.
We could just have them stand at the bottom of the cliff, then drive the bus off the cliff so it lands on them.
And we could mount guillotine blades on the front grille of the bus.
And fuckin’ lasers! Everything’s better with lasers!
Well, I hope you’re happy.
Everyone on this thread just made the baby Atrios cry.
Anonymous said,
August 10, 2010 at 5:34
I thought that, in Real America™, parents are grassfed beef stock.
Oh no, definitely corn-fed.
lobbey said,
August 10, 2010 at 6:03
I for one welcome our buxom chunky Reese Witherspoon overlords.
its a dream come true for some of us..
smiling dog said,
August 10, 2010 at 6:36
I think that Thomas Sowell missed the boat on this one:
http://www.capitalismmagazine.com/culture/living/sports/1321-Was-the-Baseball-Juiced.html
BUTT HUNK said,
August 10, 2010 at 6:38
We’re doing pretty okay here in Massachusetts. Still maintaining the lowest divorce rate in the nation. Please please someone get him to respond to this fact.
A Regular Commenter said,
August 10, 2010 at 7:07
I’d just like to point out that I’m one of the fairly frequent commenters here and the family income is at or just over the $250K point. We would happily pay the additional marginal rate. We have friends in a similar situation who have no problem with increasing the rate to Clinton (or for that sake, Carter) era levels.
We don’t all need to be dropped off a cliff, bused to our death or guillotined.
A little discretion here, folks.
Besides, OOH LOOK A ZOMBIE! GET HIM!
Angry Geometer said,
August 10, 2010 at 8:27
I think that Thomas Sowell missed the boat on this one:
http://www.capitalismmagazine.com/culture/living/sports/1321-Was-the-Baseball-Juiced.html
Dude, you read Capitalism Magazine for the articles?
No-Visible-Means said,
August 10, 2010 at 9:06
BINGO!!!!!!!!! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!
There are enough “Chubby Chasers” in the male population that a “chunky” Reese Witherspoon need not settle for a Ross Douthat. Plus, the writing. “Do Harvard men” and “masticates”. It’s like a 9th grader trying his hand at gothic novels.
What really raises my eyebrows is that an editor let it go to print. The only explanation I can come up with is, “Okay, Ross. If you really want to embarrass yourself like this, who am I to stand in your way.” Stet.
justme said,
August 10, 2010 at 9:59
There’s a certain poetic justice in Overton defenestration.
Of course. Fret not. I for one don’t have it out for people who do well making an honest buck. Hell, I don’t even mind a bit of crookery here and there. It’s the pissbuckets that whine about what fucking victims they are because they’ll have to steal three percent more cat food out of granny’s mouth to cover their nut and that’s almost as bad as working, for Christ’s sake who make me want to flense them with a Garden Weasel and some fire ants. From the inside. It’s the sense of entitlement and the hypocrisy and the contempt. Those guys? Fuck ‘em. With straight razors. Actual working professionals who make bank and still understand that they share as much if not more responsibility in the upkeep of society as the rest of us? Love ‘em. We need more of them.
Just to clarify, y’know.
Pseudonym said,
August 10, 2010 at 11:27
My meagre contribution to the debate: http://jimisworkinghard.blogspot.com/2010/08/ross-douchehat-not-exactly-marriage.html
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 12:44
N__B, I’m afraid your repeated objections have proven you to be objectively pro-aristocrat. It gives me no joy to point this out, but the dialectic requires that you will have to join them at the cliff-top, comrade.
I told you guys: I don’t do monkey work. From each polar bear according to whom he wants to maul, to each polar bear according to how many seals he can eat.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:11
I’d just like to point out that I’m one of the fairly frequent commenters here and the family income is at or just over the $250K point. We would happily pay the additional marginal rate.
You have disqualified yourself from ankle grabbing and cliff flying.
Help me grab that one, wouldja?
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:11
And what justme said. Too.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:18
Let me also point out that the discussion going on in DC is not about $250K per family it’s $250K for an individual or $500K per family.
Smut Clyde said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:19
From each polar bear according to whom he wants to maul, to each polar bear according to how many seals he can eat.
However, N__B is not a furry.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:30
Hey, Marx said it, not me.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 10, 2010 at 13:43
Marx was a furry.
~
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:12
http://krugman.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/08/09/schoolteachers-driving-cadillacs/
Paul Krugman tears apart the little bitches whining about welfare queens in the public sector.
Snorghagen said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:16
The Theory of Relativity is a godless liberal lie.
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:41
Yeah, it totally does. My question is this: will get their “ass”es “banned”?
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:43
My question is this: will get their “ass”es “banned”?
My question is this: why does your question start the 1970s commercial “Bain de Soleil for that San Tropez tan” music going in my head?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:46
Everyone on this thread just made the baby Atrios cry.
Is baby Atrios as pasty and poorly-coiffed as grownup Atrios?
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:52
Because if you squint, you could almost see “tanned asses”.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:55
Whoa. Ted Stevens may have been in a plane crash.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:56
The theory of relativity is a mathematical system that allows no exceptions. It is heavily promoted by liberals who like its encouragement of relativism and its tendency to mislead people in how they view the world.[1]
You guys always bring me the very best entertainment.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:57
Ted Stevens may have been in a plane crash.
Shannyn Moore, a DJ for talk radio up there, is confirming that story, altho hers is at least second hand info
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 14:59
The theory of relativity is a mathematical system that allows no exceptions. It is heavily promoted by liberals who like its encouragement of relativism and its tendency to mislead people in how they view the world
Amazing.
Nevermind for a minute that the guy who thought it up basically got us the nucular bomb. Nevermind that it’s been proven over and over again to be basically correct. Nevermind that, yes, it allows for relativistic arguments because THAT’S HOW THE FUCKING UNIVERSE WORKS, on a scalar level.
No, it’s a liberal plot. Of course.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:00
I’d just like to point out that I’m one of the fairly frequent commenters here and the family income is at or just over the $250K point. We would happily pay the additional marginal rate.
For the record, this isn’t me.
But I concur. I’d pay it, gladly.
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:01
Also a liberal plot
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:02
WTF, Gibbs?
Although even I have to agree that saying Obama is just like Bush is ridiculous.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:03
Also a liberal plot
If that isn’t a little boy in that dress, with the watering can, then the mother is reinforcing gender stereotypes and therefore this is CONSERVATIVE!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:05
Also a liberal plot
If that isn’t a little boy in that dress, with the watering can, then the mother is reinforcing gender stereotypes and therefore this is CONSERVATIVE!
Also, that looks like a collection of mostly non-edible plants and maybe even non-native species…real liberals don’t grow flowers and use basil as groundcover!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:11
I ran out of allergy pills this morning. It’s ragweed season. I may die.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:12
I may die.
Can I get your stuff?
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:14
Also, that looks like a collection of mostly non-edible plants and maybe even non-native species…real liberals don’t grow flowers and use basil as groundcover!
What? No hemp? No illicit marijuana? NO PEYOTE????
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:15
Can I get your stuff?¹
¹Veiled necrophilia reference
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:16
real liberals don’t grow flowers and use basil as groundcover!
BASIL?!! Pshaw. Arctostaphylos uva-ursi in full sun, Asarum canadense in deep shade. Also, flowers are OK as long as they are part of an integrated pest management and pollinator feeding program.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:16
The Theory of Relativity is a godless liberal lie.
Fuckin GPS, etc.
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:19
Peyote is a native…
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:20
Can I get your stuff?
Yeah, I guess. I don’t know what you’ll do with a bunch of women’s clothes and shoes. Don’t sit in the Bertoia side chair until you take it to a welder. Sorry about all the dead plants.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:22
I don’t know what you’ll do with a bunch of women’s clothes and shoes.
Sell them to Actor, obviously.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:22
BASIL?!! Pshaw
Dunno. Just made that up. I DON’T HAVE A YARD, OKAY???
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:22
Sell them to Actor, obviously.
Thanks for that SASQ.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:22
Sell them to Actor, obviously.
Only the bras and panties.
Disingenious Lurker said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:25
If you enjoy reading the trainwreck that is conservapedia, then you have to checkout rationalwiki.com.
They mock convervapedia hourly here:
http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Conservapedia:What_is_going_on_at_CP
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:25
Y’know, that’s a little creepy…
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:27
Hey, I’m just engaging in a little free-market capitalism, ransacking the dead to sell to the fetishists…much like Tom Clancy.
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:30
Don’t sell anything to actor. He’ll go all Jaime Gumb on our asses.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:32
Don’t sell anything to actor. He’ll go all Jaime Gumb on our asses.
And just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse…
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:33
Don’t sell anything to actor. He’ll go all Jaime Gumb on our asses.
Look, I didn’t ask for her hair.
I was waiting for you to
fall into the oubliettedonate yours.Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:37
much like Tom Clancy.
Ouch.
I used to like the guy a lot – read all his books in my early teens. I still say his original books are very good, but the last four have been absolute dreck – that’s when he went all-out into politics, with the thriller stuff just serving as a background.
Odd sort of conservative, though. He hates liberals and will never miss a chance to tell you so, but he’s not nearly conservative enough to win a nomination. (That in itself should scare you).
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:41
I’ve got nothing against Clancy as long as he (a) doesn’t run for office and (b) is ever in the same room as me. His adult fans frighten me: they strike me as people who masturbate to descriptions of military violence.
Clancy’s like Rand: nothing to be ashamed of if read before the age of majority.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:43
Was Rand Paul named after Ayn Rand?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:44
Was Rand Paul named after Ayn Rand?
No, I think his full name is Randall.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:44
Damn, that would have been so perfect.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:45
I’m sure everybody is already aware of this from TBogg or elsewhere, but this
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:45
He shortened Randall to Rand to be more like Ms. Rosenbaum. So he’s the asshole on this sub-topic, not his parents.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:45
He didn’t use to be that crazy, though. If you read “Hunt for Red October” or “Red Storm Rising,” it’s very good and very realistic war fiction, and it doesn’t glorify war or violence. The politics are there to some extent, but none of the fanaticism you see in his later books.
As some people have said about OSC, I wonder if it’s him who changed or if there was a change in ghostwriters.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:46
He didn’t use to be that crazy, though. If you read “Hunt for Red October” or “Red Storm Rising,” it’s very good and very realistic war fiction, and it doesn’t glorify war or violence. The politics are there to some extent, but none of the fanaticism you see in his later books.
I’ll take your word for it. I’ve got better books waiting to be read.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:46
No, I think his full name is Randall.
He personally shortened it to “Rand”, altho it’s not clear he did this in her honor.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:47
I’m sure everybody is already aware of this from TBogg or elsewhere, but this
OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:47
Agree on the fans, though. Agree even more about the people who treat him like a military or foreign policy expert (especially after 9/11 when he was praised to the highest heavens for “predicting” suicide airliners – sixteen years after “Escape from New York”).
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:50
I’m sure everybody is already aware of this from TBogg or elsewhere, but this
There’s already a bar right next door to the mosque and my recollection is it ain’t exactly a meat market for girls. I don’t think it caters to Islamic men, but it probably will at some point.
Those, you know, who actually drink.
The funny thing about this cultural center that everyone on the right has ruffled feathers over, it’s going to be about as religious as a chapel in a hospital. It’s going to be more like a YMCA than anything else.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:50
Levi Johnston says he’s running for mayor of Wasilla.
Disingenious Lurker said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:50
I’m sure everybody is already aware of this from TBogg or elsewhere, but this
Wait. Isn’t hating fags something conservatives and Muslims agree on?
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:51
I’ll take your word for it. I’ve got better books waiting to be read.
I don’t blame you.
Re the Rand Paul/Ayn Rand thing, the only reason I don’t think it was deliberate is because Ayn Rand was such a flaming atheist. I can see Randall agreeing with her or drawing inspiration from her, but actually naming himself after an atheist? Isn’t that going kinda far?
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:51
Agree even more about the people who treat him like a military or foreign policy expert (especially after 9/11 when he was praised to the highest heavens for “predicting” suicide airliners – sixteen years after “Escape from New York”).
Fuck that. Al Qaeda had announced their intentions. Hell, they practically gave us a blueprint to the plans in the Marseilles debacle of 1998.
Who the fuck is Clancy to “predict” that which was fait accompli?
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:52
If Gutfield thinks building a gay bar in NYC will enrage liberals, he doesn’t really know us that well.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:53
It’s just so fucking juvenile.
And apparently, they think that Muslims only come in the Pat Robertson variety or something…
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:56
I can see Randall agreeing with her or drawing inspiration from her, but actually naming himself after an atheist? Isn’t that going kinda far?
He worships libertarianism far more than he worships Jebus.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:56
Jesus was totes a libertarian.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:59
And apparently, they think that Muslims only come in the Pat Robertson variety or something…
The entire meme against this “mosque” is that the guy running it, can’t recall his name, has one donation from a group that is sorta linked to Hamas.
That’s like saying a contribution from the Boy Scouts is toxic because they wear green uniforms like the US Army.
Manwhile, the imam himself was one of the first Muslim clerics in the world to condemn the attacks, stood shoulder to shoulder with Christian leaders in denouncing the attacks, and you would think being interviewed on Sixty Minutes days after the attack, condemning it as an act of criminals would have been enough.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 15:59
Imam Rauf. That’s the name.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:01
Jesus was totes a libertarian.
Render under Caesar that which is Caesar’s, but ONLY UP TO A FUCKING POINT.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:02
First thing that comes up when Googling “Imam Rauf.”
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:02
The politics are there to some extent, but none of the fanaticism you see in his later books.
As late as Executive Orders, he was always careful to draw a distinction between terrorists (bad) and Muslims (good). I don’t know if that survived 2001, but it would be enough to get him blacklisted these days.
I never really objected to the big picture politics in Clancy because the bad guys really are out to get you. The key difference between Jack Ryan and a guy like Krauthammer is that Jack Ryan really does live in a world where nefarious and powerful enemies are constantly scheming to destroy the United States and will pounce at the least sign of weakness. Krauthammer just thinks that’s where we live because he is delusional. (I did have problems with the small picture politics. In Clancy, as in Rand, any character who doesn’t agree with the author is also a sniveling, worthless coward.)
In my opinion, Clancy only really jumped the shark in Rainbow Six, which was about environmentalists made completely of straw who weep bitter tears at the death of laboratory animals while planning the genocide of the human race.
Lurking Canadian said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:03
If Gutfield thinks building a gay bar in NYC will enrage liberals, he doesn’t really know us that well.
I know, right? I still have a furrow of confusion on my brow. “Is this supposed to piss me off for some reason? Does it comply with the local zoning ordinances? Then let your freak flag fly!”
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:03
So, eighth graders now write for BigFuckaduck? Wow. That article’s shorter could easily be summed up by “nanny nanny boo boo”.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:04
Render under Caesar that which is Caesar’s, but
ONLY UP TO A FUCKING POINT.but, man, is he asking for a lot of croutons and anchovies.Fiqqst ’cause I’m hungry.
Rusty Shackleford said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:05
The wise man builds his house upon the rock; the foolish man builds his house where some government bureaucrat tells him to.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:09
Manwhile, the imam himself was one of the first Muslim clerics in the world to condemn the attacks, stood shoulder to shoulder with Christian leaders in denouncing the attacks, and you would think being interviewed on Sixty Minutes days after the attack, condemning it as an act of criminals would have been enough.
If you read the anti-Muslim dreck overflowing from the comments section on the right wing blogosphere, you’ll find one of the most persistent justifications is their endless chants of “Why won’t they condemn 9/11? Why won’t they condemn 9/11?” Invariably directed against people who have been screaming themselves hoarse for the last nine fucking years doing exactly that. Exactly fucking that!!!
Of course, that doesn’t fit the narrative Fox and PJM try to create of Muslims, so it never gets reported, and it’s not like these people ever read any real news.
[pant, pant, pant, pant]
DUMB, COCKGOBBLING, FUCKFACED, PEA BRAINED, LIMP DICKED, ASS HATTED, TEA BAGGING, HORSE FUCKING IDIOTS!!!
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:11
As late as Executive Orders, he was always careful to draw a distinction between terrorists (bad) and Muslims (good). I don’t know if that survived 2001, but it would be enough to get him blacklisted these days.
It did survive 9/11. That’s one of the things I always respected about him, and one of the reasons why I say he’d never win a primary.
In my opinion, Clancy only really jumped the shark in Rainbow Six, which was about environmentalists made completely of straw who weep bitter tears at the death of laboratory animals while planning the genocide of the human race.
That’s where I draw the line too. The three after that (and there’s a new one coming out) were crap as well.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:11
“Why won’t they condemn 9/11? Why won’t they condemn 9/11?”
I presume most of these commenters are white conservatives, mainly men…why won’t they condemn the Oklahoma City Bombing?
LittlePig said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:12
Jennifer was banned from the baby blue Satan by the use of that *particular* word.
She knows of what she speaks.
“Hard on the neck, but a sure cure for what ails ya”
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:15
One more; I believe I read somewhere that the imam was a Sufi. Anyone know if that’s true?
Because if so, that would make the antimosque crowd even dumber than I already think it is.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:18
Yup.
Like those retards* know the difference.
*Sorry, Trig.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:18
If Gutfield thinks building a gay bar in NYC will enrage liberals, he doesn’t really know us that well.
I think his wet dream is that the denizens of the cultural center will firebomb his bar
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:24
I think his wet dream is that the denizens of the cultural center will firebomb his bar
Yeah, and THEN we’ll have to hate Muslims because we loooooove gays.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:24
*Sorry, Trig.
Every day Trig sees news about the anti-mosque people is a very good day for Trig.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:24
Yup.
Then their failure is complete.
Sufis are somewhere between Quakers, Unitarian Universalists and New Agers. They’re also featured prominently on al-Qaeda’s shit list, and paid dearly for it during the five years of Taliban rule in Afghanistan. How the righties could imagine that -
Like those retards* know the difference.
Oh. Yeah.
Looch said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:26
I think his wet dream is that the denizens of the cultural center will firebomb his bar
Ah. Flames for the flaming, then?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:28
Oh. Yeah.
I mean, when Bush is all like “La la la, I’m going to invade a country full of Muslims…civil war? What’s that? Differnt factions? Who cares? They’re all sand n*****s”, we can’t really expect his followers to know what Sufis believe.
I mean, these are the same people who would beat the shit out of a Sikh, mistaking him for a Muslim.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:30
Did, not would. Several times in late September 2001.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:31
Did, not would. Several times in late September 2001
Of course. Poor word choice.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:33
Yeah.
One of the main reasons “Muslims” have become the number one enemy, I’m convinced, is because they simply don’t have the knowledge to box Osama into a narrower category.
They have so much trouble processing “Sunni”/”Shi’a” that you almost feel bad asking them to remember “Salafi,” “Qutbist” and all the rest.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:33
One more; I believe I read somewhere that the imam was a Sufi. Anyone know if that’s true?
That’s the bizarre thing about it: condemning him is like condemning the Presbyterians for Eric Rudolph.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:34
Most of them don’t even realize that Christianity, Judaism, and Islam are all related…duuuuuumb.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:34
That’s the bizarre thing about it: condemning him is like condemning the Presbyterians for Eric Rudolph.
God damn those Protestants and their goddamn Inquisition!
S. cerevisiae said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:34
Clancy nuked the Super Bowl just as the Vikings were about to win it
Fuck him.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:35
I mean, these are the same people who would beat the shit out of a Sikh, mistaking him for a Muslim.
N__B will bear witness to this, but suddenly on September 13th or so, yellow cabs in NYC started sporting “I am Sikh and I love America” bumper stickers.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:36
suddenly on September 13th or so, yellow cabs in NYC started sporting “I am Sikh and I love America” bumper stickers.
That’s really depressing.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:39
N__B will bear witness to this, but suddenly on September 13th or so, yellow cabs in NYC started sporting “I am Sikh and I love America” bumper stickers.
It was very weird for me because I was spending so much time at the WTC site and therefore disconnected from everything that was going on. Every few days I’d catch the news and had a hard time believing what I was reading/hearing.
But yeah, I saw that kind of sticker on cabs and at some stores.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:39
That’s really depressing.
It was really Sikh.
I will confess that I was surprised there wasn’t more violence directed at swarthy people in general, and I suspect part of the anti-undocumented backlash finds roots in this pent up anger.
Jennifer said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:40
Jennifer was banned from the baby blue Satan by the use of that *particular* word.
No, not really, and therein lies the hilarity of continuing to beat this dead horse.
I was banned because I wasn’t properly sycophantic to the big A and his inner circle. For example, because I didn’t join in the pile-on when Tena called them out. There’s several tells on this: first, the fact that someone else also used the word, in a more inflammatory context than I, just a few comments before mine, and wasn’t banned. Secondly, big A was above explaining himself or responding to my email inquiries asking “WTF?” though he happily responded to email inquiries about the incident from aforementioned members of the “inner sanctum”, and interestingly, to those who were friends of mine, lied about the incident, claiming that he had just signed on after several hours away and saw my comment (“Ah…the guillotine. An idea whose time has come…again.”) and freaked out. Given that he had put up the post with the comment in question, as well as another one 15 minutes earlier…well, you figure it out. Next there’s the stupid assumption that my comment could in any way, shape, or form be construed as a “threat” to anyone. No names mentioned, and it’s not as if in these days and times anyone is going to muscle their way through the security phalanx surrounding our politicos and execute them by guillotine.
In short, it was the half-assed excuse of a pussy who didn’t want to just own up to the fact that his ban-hammer is pretty fucking arbitrary, falling on those who don’t always agree with him and his rather than those who are causing any real problem for his blog or his “reputation”, such as it is. Though I’m not sure douches have much in the way of reputation to uphold.
So, Atrios’ crying over the word “guillotine” will remain TO FUNNY FOREVAR in my book, because it’s so revealing of who he actually is – a thin-skinned ringleader of a jr. high clique.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:42
I was banned because I wasn’t properly sycophantic to the big A
You’ve had your penicillin shots, then.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:45
Kevin Drum discusses the gay bar proposal, saying “we’re all grown-ups around here, right?” I laughed.
Chris said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:47
I will confess that I was surprised there wasn’t more violence directed at swarthy people in general, and I suspect part of the anti-undocumented backlash finds roots in this pent up anger.
We had a President then who did still draw a distinction between fighting terrorism and fighting Islam. I remember very well the guy going down to the Islamic Center in DC within two days of the attacks to promise that we didn’t hold them responsible and that it would be a war on terror, not a war on Islam.
A lot of what he did afterwards caused people to doubt his sincerity. But I don’t remember him ever deliberately inflaming the lynch mobs like the current leaders of the party.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:50
So, the woman who confronted Palin the other day was in a production of Hedwig and the Angry Inch, and now they’re saying she’s in a drag band and some other shit that I can’t be arsed to remember now…
exford legs said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:52
from kevin drum:
‘I’m willing to bet that mosques and churches and gay bars all over Manhattan have long since reconciled themselves to being within a stone’s throw of all sorts of establishments they consider less than savory. ‘
fixxt
people who frequent gay bars can find churches unsavory, no?
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:53
people who frequent gay bars can find churches unsavory, no?
“There goes the gayborhood”
TruculentandUnreliable said,
August 10, 2010 at 16:55
Oh, here it is…wtf?
And she *teaches* a theater tech class, dumbfucks.
In other news, did you know that Leonardo DiCaprio can manipulate you in your dreams?
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:00
God damn those Protestants and their goddamn Inquisition!
Well, yeah, I guess they didn’t CALL it an Inquisition, but Calvin, Knox, et alia were just as hep on burning witches and killing heretics as the Catholics were.
77south said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:01
In other news, did you know that Leonardo DiCaprio can manipulate you in your dreams?
His constant meddling in my particular dream world shows a huge lack of ambition on his part. What makes my dreams so special?
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:04
In other news, did you know that Leonardo DiCaprio can manipulate you in your dreams?
He’s a chiropractor?
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:09
I have never dreamt of DiCaprio. I may need to rethink my lack of belief in a merciful deity, because THANK YOU.
actor212 said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:14
In other news, did you know that Leonardo DiCaprio can manipulate you in your dreams?
That might explain my recent rash of dreams about ex-girl friends, but why did I own a mansion and a yacht?
77south said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:29
That might explain my recent rash of dreams about ex-girl friends, but why did I own a mansion and a yacht?
That was real life. You are dreaming now.
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:36
Hey…if you get bored today, do me a favor and pop on over to my forum. It’s very quiet. And it’s beginning to look like I’m talking to myself. And,hey, T&U and larkspur visit most days, so I know you wanna be a part of that.
N__B said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:38
The “forum” link on your home page is broken.
vacuumslayer said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:42
The designer has not finished it, which is why it’s not linked. But here’s the sneakylink: http://bethspencerdigitalartist.com/forum/index.php
tigris said,
August 10, 2010 at 17:47
Comment on T&U’s Hoft link: “This little kerfuffle will be over with by Tuesday. The left is just too weird.” That’s right, folks, the LEFT is who is ginning this up!
Snorghagen said,
August 10, 2010 at 18:22
Thanks for the link.
MC 900 Foot Jesus said,
August 10, 2010 at 18:25
The Marriage Ideal
The perfect gun is an idealist without any ideals.
Snarla said,
August 10, 2010 at 22:31
100 years ago one out of three people had lost both parents by the time we were 18 years old. And we liked it!
Marriage was sacred back then, dang it. Bring back polio!
Smut Clyde said,
August 10, 2010 at 22:55
He’ll go all Jaime Gumb on our asses.
The concept of donkeys dressed up in hand-sewn human-skin jackets is kinda kinky.
[Clancy] didn’t use to be that crazy, though.
Some time in the 90s, Clancy was invited down to the puzzle palace to address a meeting of NSA staff and explain his spin on geopolitics. There is a video.* They listened politely and thanked him afterwards for his unique and challenging views.
* Very not on Youtube.
Larkspur said,
August 11, 2010 at 0:33
When I log in to the Spencer forum, everything goes blank, so I just reload the Spencer forum link, and there it is, and there I am, all logged in. I’m sure it will all sort itself out. And it is a nice site, in spite of actor212′s nightmare inducing spirochetesque etchings. Oh, hell, what am I saying. I wanna see more etchings, and with the Spencer forum, I don’t have to risk traveling down into the underworld with actor212.
internal exile said,
August 11, 2010 at 0:33
Hey, I know you’re referring to Rush, but plenty of vicodin users are nice, intelligent people.
Civil rights for drug users! End the slurs!
actor212 said,
August 11, 2010 at 2:20
Oh, hell, what am I saying. I wanna see more etchings, and with the Spencer forum, I don’t have to risk traveling down into the underworld with actor212.
Admit it. You enjoyed the gangbang.
Bilo said,
August 11, 2010 at 2:56
Hey, speaking of fambly values, Mrs. Newt Gingrich #2 is spilling beans! (Into an omelet!)
http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2010_08/025136.php
Bilo said,
August 11, 2010 at 3:44
Sorry I’m late, busy last night, couldn’t finish this thread. (Oh, Mr. Bilfrip! Your thread is so swollen!)
Actor212, are you a millionaire? And Elmer Fudd?
Not so many divorces back in the good old days, but still lots of serial monogamy! Deaths during childbirth, disease, no antibiotics, no David Hasselhoff pulling you from the surf, trouble down at the mill, mushy remains of husbands mashed between trains down at the RR yard being scraped off by David Hasselhoff’s grandfather… Folks got plenty of chances to find a new one, I mean, Sky God expressed his displeasure with our wicked ways and tested our faith a lot more back then, by snuffing out our loved ones. Then he allowed us to discover penicillin, after 6,000 years, for some fucking reason.
>>>”Serial monogamy.” As opposed to what? Women marrying anyone who’ll have them at age 30 because they’re becoming desperate and social pressures say if they’re not married, they’re worthless? “<<>>But hey — the real slippery slope is letting people REMARRY. I say only one wedding per lifetime.<<<
Can we hold Catholic creeps Mel Gibson and Newt Gingrich to that? Please note that social conservative forced-pregnancies-with-the-wife Gibson didn't seem to have any problem with out-of-wedlock fucking with the new girlfriend, or knocking her up. Yes, he's very socially conservative, when it comes to what women do.
Now, back to why Ross was repulsed by her being on the pill: she was, by his definition, no longer a Nice Girl. She was having sex for pleasure. I assumed that Ross grew up twisted freaky Catholic his whole life, but the wiki-p tells me, "As an adolescent Douthat converted to Pentecostalism and then, with the rest of his family to Catholicism."
Which is freaky to me. But I'm not a denomination hopper. (Nor am I a donkey trough whopparrrr.)
Bilo said,
August 11, 2010 at 3:46
Come to think of it, Chunky Reese Witherspoon got lucky. If she was looking for sex for pleasure, Ross wasn’t the right place.
Reese Witherladle said,
August 11, 2010 at 8:15
Sometimes you just want a quickie followed by a lot of crying, you know?
Matt "Ynrique" Yglesias said,
August 11, 2010 at 8:30
I’d say congratulations are in order to Ross Douthat, the new hire at The New York Times. Dumping Bill Kristol in favor of Ross is a very smart move—probably the smartest one (Virginia Postrel?) the Times could have made—and will generate a conservative column that progressives will have reason to read and take seriously.
On a personal note, I’m pretty sure that when I was talking to Ross about leaving The Atlantic I specifically told him that the Times wasn’t going to have an op-ed page by the time they got around to giving guys our age columns, so there was no sense in him clutching to his idle legacy media dreams.