Jul
7
7
Who Eats Seafood Anyway?
ABOVE: Kevin D. Williamson (really)
Shorter Kevin D. Williamson, America’s Shittiest Website™
The Cost of the BP Cleanup, in Corn
- All the federal tax money spent on ethanol should be given instead to BP and other oil companies to help them pay for oil spills.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
watou said,
July 7, 2010 at 13:28
Kevin looks like David Sirota’s in-bred cousin from before they done flooded the Cahulawassee.
Carribbean Walrus said,
July 7, 2010 at 13:31
if I drove, which walruses don’t, I would have a car, which walruses don’t, and I would fill it up with gas and I would notice that my gas was 20% ethanol/methanol. That means less air pollution (and less need for ‘air repair’) and less imported oil. Fool wants something to show for ethanol subsidies, how about clean skies, mon?
Frist?
Carribbean Walrus said,
July 7, 2010 at 13:34
Do penguins count as seafood?
Can you eat petrale? Can you eat petrel? Can you eat petrol?
Ha, I made a funny, mon.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
July 7, 2010 at 13:35
How about B.P. cleans up its own mess AND we stop subsidizing corporate farmers via the ethanol scam?
~
Ted the Slacker said,
July 7, 2010 at 13:46
Either you’ve photoshopped Kevin Williamson a generous toupee, or that’s David Sirota…
Honus said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:29
Always a good idea to give money to the richest corporations to pay for environmental damage they have done by cutting corners to increase profits.
Pryme said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:38
If it’s in the sea, it’s seafood.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:41
Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™
Actually, given that in this nation, corn is subsidized, he’s not far off. We should eliminate the corn subsidy (which would have the added value of cutting into childhood obesity).
Just not give it to the oil companies, WHO HAVE THEIR OWN FUCKING PRICE SUPPORT!
El Cid said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:42
Just like the case in New Orleans of all them lazy blacks ignoring the clear warnings to get out of their when Katrina was pushing its storm surge in, those fish and sea mammals had plenty of warning and we need to stop subsidizing their lazy behavior in not migrating to other areas. If you keep patronizing animals, they will never learn to fend for themselves.
After all, give a fish a smaller fish and it’ll eat for some small portion of a day. Teach a fish to hunt in completely other ecosystems, and, well, it might die from being completely nonadapted to such new niches, but it’s better than welfare.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:46
BLERG GOT OUT OF THE BOAT.
You fucking FUCKTARD, “greenies” fucking HATE ETHANOL. It’s big business that causes corn subsidies to remain. FUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOOOOU.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 14:47
Hmm. Maybe that double serving of cold press this morning was a bad idea.
But I really, REALLY HATE ETHANOL.
77south said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:05
Ethanol from kernels of corn, is inefficient. There is a lot of validity to the charge that current ethanol incentives in the US are nothing more than price supports to big Agriculture like Monsanto and Archer Daniels Midland. In Brazil, ethanol is made from sugar cane, which is much more efficient. Here in the US where we don’t grow much sugar, cellulosic ethanol which uses the entire plant is probably a better way to go. Most cellulosic ethanol operation’s preferred feedstock is switchgrass, but cornstalks from harvested fields would work in a pinch too. The real key is to not take land away from food cultivation for fuel. This would lead to rising food prices and maybe even starvation for populations that depend on American food aid for famine relief.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cellulosic_ethanol
Ted the Slacker said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:09
Yay, now we got Andrew Sullivan’s inbred cousin…
Still it takes some chutzpah to complain about agri-biz hand-outs when one relies on wingnut-welfare subsidies to grow those mangoes.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:10
Most cellulosic ethanol operation’s preferred feedstock is switchgrass, but cornstalks from harvested fields would work in a pinch too.
Not only is corn ethanol inefficient; it utilizes TONS of fossil fuels to grow and harvest, and it’s fucking terrible for the soil. Corn is a greedy crop.
Grass grows anywhere, and it’s self-seeding. I, personally, would love to restore a lot of the current farmland that is dedicated to corn (and soy–ugh) into prairie and start a rotating cycle of harvesting that grass for fuel. It wouldn’t be enough to fuel every car on the road, but it would help stretch out fossil fuels, especially in combination with hybrids and electric cars.
But we’re more likely to kill ourselves off before doing that, I think.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:15
OH! And you don’t need to spray prairie grass or create genetically modified prairie grass in order for it to survive. Having a ton of different plants and animals in a natural environment is enough to create good yields without pesticides. And there’s no danger of some weird or disease coming in and wiping out entire crops like there is in a monoculture.
Seanly said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:16
What 77south sez.
Ethanol doesn’t lower price for gas, doesn’t help the environment and just helps to line the pockets of ADM which is owned by a 300-yr old conservative.
Also, adding ethanol was supposed to help reduce smog, but wasn’t green in terms of increasing gas mileage IIRC.
I fully support consevative efforts to end corn ethanol subsidies.
I don’t understand why conservatives fight against other alternative energy initiatives. Don’t they want us to get away from foreign oil? Surely they must understand that even the rosiest projections show we don’t have anything near enough supply of domestic oil for our SUVs. Something different will be required no matter what. But I suppose including reality in their schemes has never crossed their minds.
stackozone said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:26
I’m sorry, but did wardrobe glue that beard on…?
The Goddamn Batman Fills The Batmobile's Tank With Pure Liquid Rage, But Cellulosic Ethanol Would Make A Fine Alternative said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:29
Yeah, someone else here for switching out corn ethanol for switchgrass or some other non-food alternative. I’m also for reducing a lot: encouraging cycling and more fuel-efficient alternatives like light rail, as well as swinging from rooftops via Batrope (great for the upper body and abs, and the view can’t be beat).
watou said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:30
Ah good, no more Sirota pic, but now I see that the Wooly Willy [1] is still alive.
1. http://www.childofthe1980s.com/2007/10/05/wooly-willy/
Shell Goddamnit said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:39
What Seanly said; I have never understood the desperate need of the right to prevent any alternatives to oiloiloiloiloil. I have reasonably bright pals who actually have bought the whole abiotic oil thing so they can believe we’ll never run out, and can continue to punch hippies for big oil. Why are they so invested in remaining dependent on other countries for our main energy source?
Oh yeah, perpetual war. I forgot.
Butch Pansy said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:42
He’s got a purty mouth. You call them “ears,” I call them “love handles.” I like the way beards tickle, too.
Jasper said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:43
“The banks paid back their TARP money….”
Great point, if by “paid back” he means they still owe a couple hundred billion and what was paid back was made possible by Uncle Ben effectively paying banks to borrow money for at zero cost from the Fed. Plus there’s the $1.2 Trillion in MBS Ben took off the banks hands, creating a fake market for what was toxic waste to most investors, so nicely inflating the value of all those bonds and transferring all that default risk off banks onto taxpayers….
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 15:45
I like the way beards tickle, too.
I guess he’s a bearded crab.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:19
The problem is not ethanol, it’s corn, and stopping the current ethanol subsidies without stopping the rest of the corn (and soy and other agri-industrial products) subsidies will not fix anything. Our corporate subsidy system is welfare of the worst kind, to those who don’t need it and who use it to make the world worse.
drew42 said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:19
I trusted the shorter, but clicked through to read it anyway.
And then I read it again.
And I still don’t get Kevin’s point. I guess his post is just a product of that weird conservative mindset that lumps together all things they don’t like, like how liberals = communism = fascism = socialism = muslims = homosexuals.
In this case, I guess all money spent by the government is lumped together as “government spending” regardless of what the money is used for.
address my envelope, lips! said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:20
T&U has the right of it. Corn is a crap crop. I just don’t understand why robbing John Q.Public to pay off any business as a reward for fucking up is such a selling point for the repubs. Isn’t the free market at work when shit goes down and BP loses all its profits because it’s such a fucking greedy bunch of bastards that they’d rather risk killing every living thing in the ocean than spend a little more money on decent materials? Aren’t the Repubs messing with the free market? Doesn’t that mean they don’t get to go up when the rapture comes?
Corn-niblet ethanol is a put-up job by the corn giants. It’s a waste of time, ridiculously inefficient, and only benefits corn growers. Just like HFC, which I’d consume in moderation, except it’s in EVERY FUCKING THING I EAT, INCLUDING BREAD AND TOMATO SOUP.
address my envelope, lips! said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:22
Soy is a terrible crop, too. Anything that sucks nitrogen out of the soil like there’s no tomorrow is a terrible crop, and should only be planted once every five years in a field. And WHY IS THERE SOY IN EVERYTHING, TOO?
The only soy I like is edamame. And that’s because of the salt.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:27
Soy, like most legumes, is a nitrogen fixer, so it would be good to grow in a normal crop rotation. Corn would be fine that way, too, but of course that’s not how they do it.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:28
Soy, like most legumes, is a nitrogen fixer, so it would be good to grow in a normal crop rotation. Corn would be fine that way, too, but of course that’s not how they do it.
Exactly.
Commodity crops are teh devil.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:30
Commodity crops are teh devil.
You’re just jealous because of your gluten intolerance.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:34
You’re just jealous because of your gluten intolerance.
Hey, I can totes eat corn and soy. If I couldn’t have tacos or tofu, I would cry.
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:38
Our corporate subsidy system is welfare of the worst kind, to those who don’t need it and who use it to make the world worse.
From each person inversely to their ability, to each corporation according to its desires.
It’s a catchy slogan.
Lurking Canadian said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:40
You people are going at this all wrong. What you need to do is get AP to link to that page with the headline, REPUBLICANS WANT TO CUT FARM SUBSIDIES.
Support for the GOP will then drop from 27% to, well, to the people who went to Jonah Goldberg’s New Year’s Eve party, and then the grown-ups can run things for a while.
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 16:51
T and U kissed gluten good-bye
Couldn’t eat tacos and started to cry
When the Sadlies came out to play
T and U had lots to say.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:02
T and U kissed gluten good-bye
This is strangely arousing.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:04
T and U had lots to say.
My job is boring. Don’t judge.
This is strangely arousing.
Only if you like ladies with hives who complain about tummyaches.
vacuumslayer said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:05
“Couldn’t eat tacos”
VlesbiansexR?
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:05
strangely arousing
In your case, those words are damned near welded together.
Rusty Shackleford said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:05
Conservative is shocked, shocked to find that U.S. government subsidizes big campaign donor.
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:06
VlesbiansexR?
More a V fitting-the-meter-in-my-head R.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:06
In your case, those words are damned near welded together.
Most times, I understand why I’m aroused.
Only if you like ladies with hives who complain about tummyaches.
That’s how I like to leave them when I’m done.
vacuumslayer said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:07
Yes, my only contribution to an otherwise substantive convo is a carpet-munching joke. Cherish it, people.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:07
VlesbiansexR?
Yeah, I was sort of going for that in my original post, but it’s actually literally true, too.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:08
Yes, my only contribution to an otherwise substantive convo is a carpet-munching joke.
You lesbians and your obsessions…
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:08
That’s how I like to leave them when I’m done.
Ah, the old ragweed and ipecac fetish, eh?
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:09
Don’t judge.
We’re on a humor blog where the comments outweigh the overlords’ posts. Who said “lots to say” is bad?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:11
We’re on a humor blog where the comments outweigh the overlords’ posts. Who said “lots to say” is bad?
This is not untrue.
When I was a child, I talked so much that I would actually talk and inhale at the same time. It was actually a very useful skill when I was later in high school debate.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:11
Ah, the old ragweed and ipecac fetish, eh?
Leeches and carbon monoxide.
Lurking Canadian said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:12
, I talked so much that I would actually talk and inhale at the same time. It was actually a very useful skill when I was later in high school debate.
Also doing that makes you sound like the Bride of Satan, so I bet it made you popular at Church mixers and stuff.
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:12
I talked so much that I would actually talk and inhale at the same time.
Sort of like a bagpipe, where there’s a complete disconnect between the breathing pace and the tempo.
See, this is how I used to get dates: flattering similes.
vacuumslayer said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:13
“You lesbians and your obsessions…”
I’m a lesbian now? Hubby will be shocked. And oddly aroused…?
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:14
More a V fitting-the-meter-in-my-head R.
No it’s not! It’s lesbians, dammit!
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:15
See, this is how I used to get dates: flattering similes.
Oh, is that the new brand name for roofies?
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:15
More a V fitting-the-meter-in-my-head R.
No it’s not! It’s lesbians, dammit!
Can’t be. Lesbians are much more of an imperial-unit phenomenon.
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:16
I’m a lesbian now? Hubby will be shocked. And oddly aroused…?
There is nothing odd about it. It’s one predictable guy thing–provided said guy is not a closeted ghey hater–in which case he’ll never tell you he secretly loves it.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:16
Leeches and carbon monoxide.
Wow, that’s a new one…
Also doing that makes you sound like the Bride of Satan, so I bet it made you popular at Church mixers and stuff.
All I want to know is: why do cookies made by old Midwestern women all taste the same? And always have raisin in them?
N__B said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:16
Oh, is that the new brand name for roofies?
At least I don’t need roofies to masturbate, unlike some people I could name.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:17
Yes, just one raisin.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:18
At least I don’t need roofies to masturbate, unlike some people I could name.
It’s not my fault the rent boys closed my account.
owlbear1 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:19
From each person inversely to their ability, to each corporation according to its desires.
I think many of humanity’s problems could be solved via a very small change. If the only way a stockholder could express their displeasure at a stock’s performance, was to sell it, the world would see a lot fewer examples of pig ignorant corporate behavior.
As it stands now, we have corporate citizens who can simply say, “DO NOT INTERFERE! I AM SEEKING A PROFIT! GET OUT OF MY WAY!”.
For some reason, that is sufficient to get all those individual human beings who are actually making those short sighted and ignorant (i.e.- Greedy) decisions, off the hook.
?
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:21
See, you don’t *eat* the raisin. It’s like a communal raisin that you pass around from church member to church member, and everyone has a turn to bake it into a cookie. Sort of like the baby in a Mardi Gras king cake.
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:24
Can’t be. Lesbians are much more of an imperial-unit phenomenon.
I’m pretty sure Suburus are all metric.
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:24
imperial-unit phenomenon.
That’s a pretty rude thing to say about lesbians, btw.
Jennifer said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:25
Having just watched Gasland several days ago, I’m thrilled to learn that what BP did to the Gulf of Mexico, the gas drillers are currently doing to our drinking water all over the country. Thankfully Dick Cheney was able to get the Republican Congress to pass legislation that said they were exempt from the Clean Water and Clean Air acts to do it, so when we all die from the antifreeze they pumped into the ground (and into our water), there won’t be any of this Nazi-like insisting that they pay for the damages.
U.S.A.!!! U.S.A.!!!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:25
I’m pretty sure Suburus are all metric.
Yeah, but strap-ons are measured in inches, so I dunno…
Lurking Canadian said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:26
T&U, if everybody’s been using the same raisin all this time, then it’s no wonder the cookies all taste the same.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:27
T&U, if everybody’s been using the same raisin all this time, then it’s no wonder the cookies all taste the same.
True. Plus, it’s pretty dried out.
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:27
Yeah, but strap-ons are measured in inches, so I dunno…
Not the commie euro ones. I’d post a link but I’m a lazy hippy.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:30
Not the commie euro ones. I’d post a link but I’m a lazy hippy.
That’s okay. I’m at work anyway.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:35
If the only way a stockholder could express their displeasure at a stock’s performance, was to sell it, the world would see a lot fewer examples of pig ignorant corporate behavior.
I dunno, I think companies often listen to shareholders in a way they don’t listen to the general public. I also don’t think selling a profitable stock will teach an assholish company any lessons when there are always stock purchasers for whom profit is the only consideration.
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:37
I think many of humanity’s problems could be solved via a very small change. If the only way a stockholder could express their displeasure at a stock’s performance, was to sell it, the world would see a lot fewer examples of pig ignorant corporate behavior.
Owlbear, I recently watched a pretty well done, in depth analysis of the Enron rise and fall. The problem is human behavior–they’ll hang on to the stock, and the company’s sole purpose for living will become satisfying the stockholders and getting out before everything comes crashing to the ground. That might have been the most unsettling documentary I’ve ever watched. What those motherfuckers did to California (as a DIRECT result of their inconceivably stupid deregulation) was inarguably an atrocity. You’re right, if the stock market worked the way it used to (perform now, plan for the future, make me believe this will be worth something tomorrow, and I’ll hold the stock) then these sort of things wouldn’t happen with such sickening frequency. I think the biggest problem is the utter lack of accountability and the SEC’s SOP that lets these things run their course before they act. Their insulting fucking excuses (No one could have seen this coming…) have me out in the garage sharpening the pitchfork.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:39
This is the most genius job creation plan I’ve ever heard of.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:43
Y’all are really falling down on the job of entertaining me today. I’m disappointed.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:50
I dunno, I think companies often listen to shareholders in a way they don’t listen to the general public.
Only the ones who’s sale of stock would directly impact the price of shares AND would attract regulators.
If CalPERS, say, sold shares in bulk of General Electric (let’s assume they owned more than ten percent of the shares available), you can be pretty sure the SEC would start sniffing around. CalPERS would likely have to file some form or other indicating the reasons for the sale (it would significantly impact the ownership percentage, so the SEC would insist).
Substance McGravitas said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:50
Can’t entertain. Making Alvin Greene doll.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:51
Can’t entertain. Making Alvin Greene doll.
How much does that pay, by the way? I could use a new job.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:52
I could use a new job.
You have a standing offer, you know.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:56
You have a standing offer, you know.
I didn’t, but I’m guessing it’s not something that would use my library science skills?
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:58
I didn’t, but I’m guessing it’s not something that would use my library science skills?
Well, it could involve things between the covers, yes.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:58
I didn’t, but I’m guessing it’s not something that would use my library science skills?
Particularly your Dewy decimals.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 17:58
K-Thug smacks Brooks’ ass DOWN.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:13
Well, it could involve things between the covers, yes.
If you’re talking about what I think you’re talking about*, I had no idea I could get paid for it! I’ve been giving it away for free all these years…
*My writing.
Doctorb said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:26
Is taking off your glasses while undoing your hair bun in a single motion considered a library science skill?
A friend of mine needs to know. For school or something.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:28
Only the ones who’s sale of stock would directly impact the price of shares AND would attract regulators.
Those guys get more than listened to, they get fellated. No, I mean things like shareholder proposals which have to be paid attention to and voted on vs. letters or petitions from random people.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:31
Aaaand now we’re talking about people’s buns. You people are depraved.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:33
Is taking off your glasses while undoing your hair bun in a single motion considered a library science skill?
Yes. I took a whole class devoted to it.
DAS said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:38
You fucking FUCKTARD, “greenies” fucking HATE ETHANOL. It’s big business that causes corn subsidies to remain. – T&U
I don’t want to get off the boat, I’m queazy enough as it is, but does this yahoo think that liberals like ethanol?
Usually when it comes to junk like corn ethanol subsidies, conservatives (and especially glibertarians) realize that liberals don’t like it. So the argument becomes
Was Williamson at least up on his talking points enough to know to make that argument?
*
As to switchgrass — that was the smartest thing GW Bush ever said … although he managed to sound like a complete idiot saying it.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 18:58
I don’t want to get off the boat, I’m queazy enough as it is, but does this yahoo think that liberals like ethanol?
Yes. I have no idea why.
Chris said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:04
I don’t want to get off the boat, I’m queazy enough as it is, but does this yahoo think that liberals like ethanol?
Yes. I have no idea why.
Why not? They also think we like Sharia law and gay marriage.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:04
Because liberals love the government handing out money, no matter how! This is why we fight conservatives to get huge increases in military spending.
Pupienus Maximus said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:06
cutting into childhood obesity).
Yum. Grilled child when the fat gets charred and crusty…. OM NOM NOM
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:10
Because liberals love the government handing out money, no matter how! This is why we fight conservatives to get huge increases in military spending.
That’s the rare exception. Democrats are solidly on board with holding the oil gangs and defense contractors responsible for their behavior with unconditional tax cuts and subsidies.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:12
Yum. Grilled child when the fat gets charred and crusty…. OM NOM NOM
Delicious in the winter with a side of mashed sweet potatoes.
exford legs said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:16
Dewey decimals
GOLD
tsam said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:18
Yes. I have no idea why.
Why not? They also think we like Sharia law and gay marriage.
Not really a liberal thing, it has more to do with sifting through the propaganda and having the critical thinking skills to figure out what will eventually create a sustainable and clean energy future. Greenies see right through that corn subsidized smokescreen that ethanol represents.
It was an easy find for me–I asked myself who benefits…society or the little cabal of robber barons? It didn’t take much investigation to figure out what’s really going on here with the whole push for ethanol and trying to make alternative sources look crazy and un-doable.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:22
If you’re talking about what I think you’re talking about*, I had no idea I could get paid for it! I’ve been giving it away for free all these years…
You’re writing’s not that good.
I think you need to use my pen.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:25
I think you need to use my pen.
BE ON LOOK OUT FOR LEECHES.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:27
BE ON LOOK OUT FOR LEECHES.
My relatives left already.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:29
You’re writing’s not that good.
Good enough to know how to spell “your.” Harumph.
I think you need to use my pen.
Ballpoint or fountain?
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:31
You’re writing’s not that good.
Good enough to know how to spell “your.” Harumph.
See? Your too constricted by “rules”.
Ballpoint or fountain?
Fountain. Just tug on the handle.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:33
I could have said “quill” and told you to lick the tip.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:36
See? Your too constricted by “rules”.
Whatever, e.e. cummings.
TruculentandUnreliable said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:37
I could have said “quill” and told you to lick the tip.
What a gentleman.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:47
What a gentleman.
Where?!?!?
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:53
I could have said “quill” and told you to lick the tip.
You do know how the penknife got its name, right?
77south said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:54
All I want to know is: why do cookies made by old Midwestern women all taste the same? And always have raisin in them?
Because the only cookies that last long enough for you to get them are bad cookies. The delicious, non raisin-encumbered cookies, have a half life of about 30 seconds in the presence of hungry people. All that is left after a few minutes are the boring raisin contaminated leftovers.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:55
You do know how the penknife got its name, right?
A mohle told me once.
Lurking Canadian said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:55
Is taking off your glasses while undoing your hair bun in a single motion considered a library science skill?
Oh, STOP THAT.
I’ll be in my bunk. With a roofie. Again.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 19:58
I’ll be in my bunk. With a roofie. Again.
Hey!
I have copyrights to that!
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:00
You’ll get shingles.
Pupienus Maximus said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:01
No homo.
Gary Ruppert said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:13
The fact is shut the hell up desperitly loneley lieberals. But first tell me which Solvent tracks I should download from emusic. Heartland.
tigris said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:15
PM, that is an awesome headline.
Whale Chowder said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:16
What a gentleman.
And you claim you have writing skills. You got the punctuation all wrong:
“What, a gentleman?”
Whale Chowder said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:17
PM, that is an awesome headline.
Even better: the byline is “Gene Cherry.”
Candy said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:20
Another evil of corn is that field corn is that much of it is fed to beef cattle, which supports another hideous factor in the U.S. food chain, the factory animal farm. Unfortunately, grass fed beef is expensive. I certainly can’t afford it.
The entire farm to market food system in the U.S. is an environmental, health, and ethical nightmare. It’s not going to get fixed anytime soon, either.
actor212 said,
July 7, 2010 at 20:38
No homo
That’s some long Dix!
Smut Clyde said,
July 7, 2010 at 21:45
But I really, REALLY HATE ETHANOL.
I’ll have yours.
actually have bought the whole abiotic oil thing so they can believe we’ll never run out,
Gold’s abiotic oil theory predicts that oil slowly seeps up from the mantle until it is trapped by impermeable rock layers, so if we wait a few million years then the now-empty oil reservoirs will re-fill. Can’t see how this helps.
Shell Goddamnit said,
July 8, 2010 at 0:24
Eh, Smut, I guess my pals were buying the partial Gold theory wherein what they wanted to have happen (oil not gonna run out) would happen and not take several million years. Because that’s what they wanted. So that’s what’s true. Etc.
I said they were bright; I didn’t say they weren’t almost completely deluded. And Calvinist, to boot. Figure that one out.
Shell Goddamnit said,
July 8, 2010 at 0:29
Actually, it really really bugs me that smart people that I don’t hate believe this weird shit. I have these accusatory conversations with them in my head alla time; fortunately I don’t have occasion to confront them with these conversations very often or they wouldn’t be my pals any more, thas for sure, because *these are the people I’m really mad at. Because I think they should know better.*
Brrrr. It makes my soul cold, or something that feels like it might be my soul, if I had one, which I don’t think I do.
Smut Clyde said,
July 8, 2010 at 1:54
ABOVE: Kevin D. Williamson (really)
That man’s head is upside-down, with the chin on the top. Surely medical science can help him.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
July 8, 2010 at 2:10
Haven’t posted anything on this thread until now…I think algae (preferably used as part of sewage treatment/remediation) should be used for biofuels. If we were hanging out in a bar, I could expound on this for hours.
WOLVERINES!!!!!!CYANOBACTERIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!Bryan M. said,
July 8, 2010 at 2:57
>I have never understood the desperate need of the right to prevent
>any alternatives to oiloiloiloiloil.
This issue has nothing to do with left and right. Oil is simply the only fuel that can ever be cheap enough for working class car ownership and air travel. Very few normal people can afford to switch to something else.
“the right” didn’t prevent alternatives to wood when we deforested Europe, and it didn’t prevent alternatives to coal when we burned all the cheap coal. Now we’re at the end of cheap oil, and big business is positioning itself to profit from whatever comes afterwards.
We’re starting now to see a rollout of electric cars – each with a $20,000 battery that needs replacing every few years. These things work, but they aren’t as good or cheap as gasoline cars, and the working class won’t ever be able to afford them.
Shell Goddamnit said,
July 8, 2010 at 3:28
Oil is used for more than cars, y’know? So the desire to keep the working class in cars, which are anyway expensive & painful to buy, maintain, insure & register, must come from someplace else. Like, how horribly expensive it would be for the non-working class to pay for the infrastructure etc to allow more of the working class to be able to use say public transportation & get by without cars.
And anyway, I am speaking of the goddamned hyperactive crazed weasels that insist that we’re going to use MORE oil, not less, goddamnit, I’ve got my hummer & I’m lettin it idle out front.
I understand electric car batteries are vastly improved with more innovation coming along shortly, and anyway don’t cost anywhere near $20K any more.
Personally, I’m waiting for my 200mph electric motorcycle, with the spooky, completely silent massive monstrous roll-on acceleration oh yum yum yum. Ah…excuse me, I’ll be back inna minute.
actor212 said,
July 8, 2010 at 17:19
We’re starting now to see a rollout of electric cars – each with a $20,000 battery that needs replacing every few years. These things work, but they aren’t as good or cheap as gasoline cars, and the working class won’t ever be able to afford them.
Bryan’s right, of course. The appeal of oil is that it’s got the best bang for the buck in terms of BTUs generated per (random measure of resource), something on the order of 70% convertible to energy, where solar panels (the most effective renewable) can only generate about half as efficiently.
Shell Goddamnit said,
July 8, 2010 at 19:37
Bryan’s right that oil is cheapest. Is Bryan right that “left” & “right” aren’t relevant? Shit, tell me that all those arseholes who hate renewables are just…protecting the working class.
It would be silly to think our …situation… is all down to the right. But. It would also be silly to think that our approx 30-year lag in innovation isn’t due in large part to the right’s happy denial of reality around the time of oh say Morning in Fucking America.
tigris said,
July 8, 2010 at 19:56
I think if transportation for the working class were actually the priority (rather than profit maximization), we’d see better transit options.