Kudlow’s tears

Oh Dow, why hast thou forsaken us?

Dow Finishes Up 100 as Health Care Becomes Law

The Dow advanced more than 100 points Tuesday, despite a mixed assessment on the U.S. housing market, after President Obama signed a comprehensive health care reform package into law.

The Dow Jones Industrial Average added 103 points, or 1%, to 10,889. The S&P 500 gained 8 points, or 0.7%, to 1174, and the Nasdaq went ahead by 20 points, or 0.8%, to 2415.

Though actually, I’d feel a wee bit better if Obamacare had sent the Dow crashing and reeling into the Earth. The fact that it’s rising during an alleged government takeover of one-sixth of the economy shows that the government isn’t doing a good job of crushing private industry into dust, comrades. Furthermore, there’s this:

Bob Auer, senior portfolio manager for Auer Growth, attributed recent bullishness to the fact that there’s nothing else competing for the money.

“There really is just one thing, and it’s been said before, but it can’t be ignored: There’s nothing competing for the money. It’s not like you can go into a bank and ask for a CD,” Auer said, adding that municipals are a dicey situation, too. “The Fed said it’s going to keep rates low for a long time. They basically turned on the spigot. Nothing is going to compete with the stock market right now.”

I understand why the Fed is keeping monetary policy extremely loose right now since, you know, plunging the economy into a depression is a bad thing. I do worry about the potential for another long period of nonexistent interest rates leading to another bubble involving some stupid bullshit or another. Snatch up those collateralized POG obligations while they’re cheap, fellas!

HTML addz: And regarding another dire wingnut threat/prediction that didn’t come true: Wall Streeters didn’t Go Galt after all.

 

Comments: 23

 
 
 

Even wingnuts are smart enough to tell when a chart is going up or down, and this, more than arcane discussions about future costs to consumers or parliamentary procedure, this will make their fucking heads explode. They’ve invested their sense of self-worth and national worth in stock market culture, and now it’s betraying them!

 
 

Don’t make more of this than what it is. it’s just Granny throwing all her money at the market before our death panels get a chance to ice her.

 
 

since, you know, plunging the economy into a depression is a bad thing.

Komrade! How are we going to undermine the system of the capitalist swine if you defend them in this way?

Everyone must be miserable and poor and wear only Party-approved rags! It is the only path to freedom!

 
 

Can someone who pays more attention to stockmarket get us information of how much that raise was caused by firearm, ammunition and survival equipmet sales in US?

I’m just curious.

 
 

Don’t make more of this than what it is. it’s just Granny throwing all her money at the market before our death panels get a chance to ice her.

Well played.

 
 

it’s just Granny throwing all her money at the market before our death panels get a chance to ice her.

I applaud Granny’s, er, long-term approach to having a week to live.

Many people would opt more for the hookers-n-coke scenario, I imagine.

 
 

Can someone who pays more attention to stockmarket get us information of how much that raise was caused by firearm, ammunition and survival equipmet sales in US?

I understand that charcoal grill futures are up.

Oh, ‘scuse me, char-coh gree-ul.

 
 

Someone got a spare Granny who can throw some spondulix my way, perchance?

 
 

Even wingnuts are smart enough to tell when a chart is going up or down

Oh yeah? See Climate; Change due to anthropogenic influences.

 
 

Point taken, Citizen_X, but you see, this chart is about teh money, which serves as a combination of god, fetish object, and unconditional excuse for everything, and is in no way sociamalist or Algore, so they’ll be more sensitive to its ups and downs (not entirely veiled PENIS reference.)

 
 

A few years back, I was able to watch FOX in the UK. One thing that always stuck in my mind was that the nice and fat bloke who ran the business show – Neil Cavuto or something – always used to link a rise in the stock market with something Bush had said.

As FOX news channel is fair and balanced, I look forward to seeing similar commentary in regards to health care reform and the performance of the market.

 
 

Many people would opt more for the hookers-n-coke scenario, I imagine.
Yes, but in granny’s case that would be coals to Newcastle.

 
 

Market reaction says everything anyone needs to know about how well the Stupak-Lieberman pseudo-reform will control health care costs…

 
 

Many people would opt more for the hookers-n-coke scenario, I imagine.

In fact, forget the coke!

 
 

collateralized POG obligations

I go Pogo!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Someone got a spare Granny who can throw some spondulix my way, perchance?

No spondulix, how about some cowries?

 
 

No spondulix, how about some cowries?

Why do you hate quahogs so?

 
 

“I applaud Granny’s, er, long-term approach to having a week to live.

Many people would opt more for the hookers-n-coke scenario, I imagine.”

Welllllll…….She’s a hip Granny.

Very hip.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

No spondulix, how about some cowries?

Why do you hate quahogs so?

Quatloos or nothin’.

 
 

holy FSm, I am giggling my ass off, and for a zombie that’s a serious problem believe me, how can you shamble without an ass, but I am giggling at these comments, and there is no weed involved, just semi-heroic amounts of rum, and maybe a bit of white whine.

 
 

As any good ecomomic pundit can tell you, the performance of the Dow as it rose over the past year from 6500 to 10500+ is in no way a measure or validation of the current clueless administration or its policies, which have clearly failed in doing anything other than destroying america.

It merely reinforces the well know principle that if you really want to improve your jump shot, you need to tie a dead cat to both your feet. Those fuckers got some god-damned bounce in them.

 
 

Uriel,

Frankly, I think the Dow has skyrocketed on news that Apple is about to release it’s new software product, iDeath, where you can pick and choose which elderly relative Obama will kill next.

Yes. There’s an app for that!

 
 

I’m sure they’ll cheer up come November.

 
 

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