your search for worshipping a cardboard cutout of ronald reagan produced zero results

my comment was too short. all i wanted to say was “ew”.

However,

worshipping a cardboard cutout of george bush produces 98,900 results. Thank You, Jesus Camp!

http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHMB_enUS365US365&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=worshipping+a+cardboard+cutout+of+george+bush

Re: the Young Cons, I have urgent, breaking news! I just received a telegraph from my great-grandmother, it reads:

Just saw televideo STOP Have a total boner STOP Rest of community eagerly awaiting rap solving unemployment STOP Fanfic request for a lyric about a quote “John Galt” unquote STOP My dad is requesting the EP release for the Young Cons furnished with Sarsaparilla and Tapioca pudding STOP We demand that all Americans be sent a free copy of Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman FULL STOP

You don’t want to read the next message I received. It was like Cocoon meets Dawn of the Dead.

and on the subject of cardboard presidents –

i’m looking forward to life under President Smiley McMormonpants. it will be like living in a plastic valium disneyland of the soul

Two white boys in most dire need of blowjobs in modern history. Unfortunately for them, the only person I can stepping is the human steyn. Nothing says “edgy” & “hip” like two rhythym-deficient, stiff, erect, white guys in suits.

This thread is lonely & it wants to die.

SO WHITE. SO VERY, VERY WHITE.

I watched a little of it. Now I need to call in sick. OMG.

The Gipper’s performance in that video wasn’t bad. Not a fan of that “government is the problem” line, but he delivers it well. Those other two guys were rather wooden though….you might even say cardboard.

A Sarah Palin word salad with a backbeat and some rhyme? If there was more fiddle, it would be Number One with a bullet.

I want to hear more fiddle.

I already feel nauseous from the meds. I am afraid to click on that link. I remember too well the previous whitebread rap. I am able to sleep at night, but still the dreams come….

OK, that’s not a parody?

They’re doing that with *cough* straight faces?

Tongues not in cheek?

Oh, my.

And yes, yes, veiled wevs.

And yes, yes, veiled wevs.

More like tongues in Reagan’s zombie asscheeks, amirite? LULZ!

But srsly, no fucking way I’m clicking on that. Two whiter than white douchebags stuttering out Reagan quotes? I’d rather deal with the fact that Doughy Pantload has a mother.

Yeah, it’ll go viral- like smallpox.

I’d rather deal with the fact that Doughy Pantload has a mother.

The fact that you nailed her is central to my point.

The fact that you nailed her is central to my point.

I am ashamed by the fact that Lucianne has put me so off that I’ll never be able to scream “I DID YOUR MOMMA!!!” in Jonah’s face. Sure the sweet sweet touch of Wangchuck might even pierce through her cold hard shell of prejudice, spite and hate – but that’s a bridge too far.

Atrocious? Nah, more like tedious. It’s like they had a conservative blog laundry list of things to include.

Claiming fetus = baby: check
Reference to Acorn: check x3 or so
Shout-out to bloggers to get links: Malkin and Steyn, check
Comparing socialism to fascism: check

Yawn. I suppose they deserve some credit for putting the talking points to rhyme, bad though it is. Maybe Cantor can use that technique at the next health care summit.

Oh, these boys are very serious and are so twisted, they think this video is really cool. They remind me of the original Young Cons of my college days (who didn’t call themselves that, but looked exactly like these kids) back in the early and mid-80s when Reagan was president.

They were a few rungs above brownshirts in their zeal. Their biggest complaint (before they even actually paid income taxes or had anything at stake) was the canard of Welfare Queens. Oh, the good ol’ dayz.

That had to be Poe.

This… is a fucking atrocity.

I don’t know,…

It certainly shows the depths of Ronnie’s character…

You less than three me? Aw, I thought I meant more to you than that, you cheap bastard.

i’m looking forward to life under President Smiley McMormonpants. it will be like living in a plastic valium disneyland of the soul

I hope we all get special magical undies and secret names!

Thanks a fucken lot. Now I’m blind and I can’t even find the boat to get back into it. Good thing I brought my celly. Maybe I can leave a message for my loved ones not to follow the trail of mangoes to destruction.

By the way:

PPPPPPPP EEEEEEEE NN NN IIIII SSSSSSSS
PP PP EE NNN NN IIIII SS
PPPPPP EEEEE NN N NN IIIII SSSSSSSS
PP EE NN NN IIIII SS
PP EEEEEEE NN NN IIIII SSSSSSSSS

oh damn, forgot to block-quote it. It was really clever. Trust me.

A new record–I could only manage eight seconds of it.

Isn’t there something about that sort of thing in the Geneva Conventions Against Torture?

Since I have no self-respect, I watched the video, and thought I heard one of the rappers say something about hungry conservatives eating Ronnie meat.

I now must go and kill myself.

I haven’t seen such awkward dancing since junior high gym class!

Who was that kid mumbling at the beginning of the video? Did they drug him and threaten his mommy if he didn’t make the recording?

I’m waiting for their first album: The Young Cons: Law and Order.

i’m looking forward to life under President Smiley McMormonpants. it will be like living in a plastic valium disneyland of the soul

That’s it. I’m getting my soma scrip now, for great justice.

But srsly, no fucking way I’m clicking on that. Two whiter than white douchebags stuttering out Reagan quotes?

Just watch it on mute and check out their fly moves. It’s the new dance craze sweeping the nation: the stiff!

That cardboard guy was the best dancer of the bunch.

“Eat the rhino meat!” Yo!

Nothing says cool like dorm lobbies.