Feb
17

Alkonetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health




Posted at 22:10 by Tintin

bronzino_amy
Agnolo Bronzino (prob. Jacopo Pontormo): “Portrait of a
Shitmoat Builder with Her Litter“(c. 1530)(soil on wood)

Oh goodness me. You let Amy Arnold Alkon out of your sight for just a few minutes and the next thing you know she’s up to her usual shit-moat antics again, this time obsessively trolling the Amazon comments thread for her new book Fuck You, You C–t, You’re Rude, a soon-to-be-remaindered how-to paperback currently busting the top of the Amazon charts at #65,682.1 For those who haven’t yet had the time to read Amy’s Arnold’s book, it retells various anecdotes in which Amy Arnold sought revenge on “rude” people, rude being defined as anyone who annoys Amy Arnold and includes just about anyone who isn’t Amy Arnold.

One of Amy’s favored revenge tactics is the Internet outing of anyone who suggests on the Internet that Amy Arnold might not be someone they’d “friend” on Facebook or even want to stand near in a checkout line. Her latest victim was an Amazon commenter nymed BookWorm222 who called Amy’s Arnold’s book “irritating” and “drivel.” Amy justified her own boorish and rude behavior thusly:

Unmasking people who behave badly, like this woman trying to hurt the sales of a book she clearly has not read, is precisely what I’m all about.

Leaving aside how one negative comment could hurt the Amazon sales of a book ranked #65,682, which according to some means a sales volume of around 5 entire books per month, Amy’s clear goal here is to try to intimidate anyone from posting negative reviews of her chef-d’oeuvre. And I think I’m safe in saying that this intimidation shouldn’t succeed. So, folks, if you’ve read the book, not liked it, and want to stand up for freedom of speech, tell Amy Arnold what you think of the book. Comedy points will be awarded (but only to people who’ve actually read the book) for 3, 4, and 5 star reviews (harder to get removed than 1 star reviews) with what my grandmother used to call “back-handed” compliments — for example, a statement that for a book written by someone whose mother tongue is Serbian, the book has a surprisingly small number of grammatical errors. Or a statement that even though Amy’s advice got you banned from Safeway, it was worth having to do your shopping in another store just to be able to scream your head off at the woman with a crying baby in the Safeway. Etc., etc., etc.

UPDATE: This, from Amy’s Arnold’s blog, may explain a good deal of the erratic behavior on display in her book and her Amazon comment trolling:

I deal with some of the anti-drug paranoia surrounding my own ingestion of Ritalin. Sure, some people abuse it, but it helps me focus so I can write. And I’ve been taking the same 10 mg. dose for about 10 years. Better living through chemistry. It’s simply fantastic that I can take a pill, with almost no side-effects for me, apparently (according to an epidemiologist friend) and be better at what I do.

No side effects? Nuh-uh.


1To put this sales ranking in context, Amy’s Arnold’s book ranks somewhere in between Hitler’s Mein Kampf (in English) currently at #31,151 and Hitler’s Mein Kampf (in German) currently at #136,114.

362 Comments »

  1. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:12

    Leaving aside how one negative comment could hurt the Amazon sales of a book ranked #65,682

    You forget: Amy is of the class that hands out medals to anyone who makes it thru prep school.

    So, folks, if you’ve read the book, not liked it, and want to stand up for freedom of speech, tell Amy Arnoldwhat you think.

    Kin we just slam her for shits and giggles?

    Don’t answer that. I remember the Miller fiasco.

  2. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:18

    My review:

    If you want to learn how to be really rude and obnoxious and yet keep some weird semblance of self-esteem with a large dollop of ego on top, this book is for you! Arnold Alkon has many lessons on how to set straight innocent people who might have the misfortune of crossing her path and pissing her off. A must read for anyone who lives in the same town as Mr Alkon!

  3. mmy said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:19

    Why are you repeatedly calling her Arnold? Is this some kind of old joke that I missed?

    Or are you just saying that she looks like a man? I would have thought the S,N! staff above that kind of joke.

  4. mmy said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:22

    By the way, I’m totally down with the “she looks like an Arnold” joke, but that should be why I’m a commenter and you’re the staff.

  5. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:23

    Did I mention I tagged it “Sh*tmoat*?

    I forgot to mention that.

  6. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:24

    Why are you repeatedly calling her Arnold?

    She accused a critic on her blog of being “a tranny.”

  7. Tintin said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:26

    @mmy. It’s an old joke that isn’t premised on claims that she looks like a man (she doesn’t) but that she dresses like a drag queen. To add to the joke, she kept thinking we were calling her a transexual and saying that this was politically incorrect, even though we were trying to make a transvestite joke. Since I’m French, a fag, or both, it isn’t un-PC for me to make drag queen jokes.

  8. Tintin said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:27

    @mmy. What actor212 says too.

  9. Mark said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:28

    Even though Arnold’s advice got me involuntarily comitted, I think this book is well worth the hard earned Amazon Gift Certificates you received at christmas.

  10. Esteev said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:31

    Wow. I read the “discussion” on Amazon and you’ve got to be kidding me. This (wo)man, Arnold, actually went out of her way to combat a 35 word review? What a joke.

    100 Esteev Points to the person who correctly names the person who wrote the following:

    You spend your time playing out a grudge against me on Amazon

  11. Marion in Savannah said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:32

    For what it’s worth, you can say almost anything rude in your review if you follow it with “bless her heart,” as in “The Smith’s new baby looks just like a runt piglet, bless her heart.” I can’t play reviewer because I haven’t read the book (and certainly have no intention of doing so).

  12. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:37

    I can’t play reviewer because I haven’t read the book

    Here…I can lend you my copy right here on S,N!

    Read it? Go for it.

  13. Marion in Savannah said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:40

    Um, thanks, I think…!

  14. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:41

    Um, thanks, I think…!

    Odd, that was my reaction when I read it, too!

  15. tigrismus said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:44

    Kin we just slam her for shits and giggles?

    Don’t answer that. I remember the Miller fiasco.

    I would just like to point out, totally unrelated to the topic at hand, that’s it’s A Free Country.

  16. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:45

    that’s it’s A Free Country

    Unless you’re an average citizen, in which case Arnold Alkon is free to rudely post your personal information all over the place.

  17. tigrismus said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:48

    Yes, but that just goes to show that she is A Cunt.

  18. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:53

    Wow. She actually wrote a screed against someone who pointed out the absurdity of publishing a smug and rude book about manners.

    Um, actually, I constantly tell the press and say at readings, “I didn’t write this book because I have perfect manners. In fact, I’m rude. We all are. Rudeness is the human condition. I just try to recognize the ways I need to do better, and try really hard.”

    So, Scott, you’re yet another person posting here who doesn’t sound like he read my book. What is it, were you shouting on a cell phone somewhere and I asked you to pipe down? You have one “review” on Amazon, and it’s about me as a person, the name for my column — everything but the content of my book.

    If you read my book, you’d see it’s not about “extolling (my) own moral superiority” in the slightest. I did exhaustive research, pulled together findings from anthropology, econ, and other fields, figured out why people are rude (we live in societies too big for our brains) and how to change things: by using the Internet to shame rude people, to bring back the constraints of the hunter-gatherer village size our minds are adapted for, and by making an effort to treat strangers like neighbors.

    Furthermore, I consider giving unsolicited advice rude. Perhaps it’s escaped you, but the method for advice columns is that people write you and ask for your help and you write back. I don’t randomly seek people out by e-mail and tell them what to do.

    As far as “The Advice Goddess” goes, it’s a joke. I lost the trademark to “The Advice Ladies” when my former partners and I split up, and syndicated my column to a second paper and needed a name fast. Terry Rossio, who wrote Shrek, and who’s a friend, suggested “Amy Alkon, Opinionated Bitch,” which I loved. But, I thought it might keep me from getting into daily papers. So, my business card back then said “Freelance Goddess,” so I just became “The Advice Goddess.”

    Regarding judging people, as my late friend Cathy Seipp used to say when people said, “Why that’s a value judgment”: “I have values, therefore I make judgments.” My judgment here is that you have some grudge against me and thought it would feel yummy and good to try to hurt the sales of my book. You surely haven’t read it, because you get it completely wrong in what you write above. How ugly to be somebody who does what you did. You’re precisely the kind of person who inspired me to write this book. -Amy Alkon

  19. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    February 17, 2010 at 22:54

    One day, while driving, Mister Vengeance drives into a careless pedestrian. Sure enough, there’s a scratch on his bumper, so Mister Vengeance decides to get even.

    Oddly enough, there’s almost nothing on the t00bz regarding Buddy Hickerson’s Mister Vengeance.

  20. pedestrian said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:02

    I just try to recognize the ways I need to do better, and try really hard.

    So as soon as you figure that out, you get back to us.

  21. Froley said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:03

    You can read the first 6 pages on Amazon. She does make a reference to spotted owls, which is fresh and edgy. She also drops Starbucks, genital warts, Peter Parker/Spiderman, Johnny “Jackass” Knoxville (yes that’s how she refers to him), Trader Joe’s and Hesiod into the mix.

    If she wants to cure her problem of being annoyed by the people around her she should have a kid. Then again, I wouldn’t wish that on the kid.

  22. EnfantTerrible said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:10

    Possible review: “This book is a must-read for folks like James Lileks, who need help in coping with minimum-wage staff at big-box retailers like Target.”

    It needs work though – I’m just not funny enough to pull it off.

  23. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:14

    She’s so tiresome I can’t even summon the will to write a spoof review. In a way, knowing she takes such minor slights so incredibly personally takes the fun out of it.

  24. pedestrian said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:16

    I was taught that being well-mannered does not mean that you do not spill the gravy boat – it means that you do not notice when the gravy boat is spilled.

    Amy would grab you by the neck and smash your face in the spilled gravy until your nose is broken, then scoop your blood into the dish and loudly ask who wants to try your bloody gravy.

  25. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:20

    Possible review: “This book is a must-read for folks like James Lileks, who need help in coping with minimum-wage staff at big-box retailers like Target.”

    Oooh, we’d have to work in…was it Dan Riehl and the kids on the DC Metro?

  26. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:21

    I just try to recognize the ways I need to do better, and try really hard.

    Amy, ur doin it rong.

  27. Bigby said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:22

    I thought the Arnold thing had to do with Green Acres, it doesn’t???

  28. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:22

    Rusty, Enfant,

    Fortunately, Amazon allows you to merely click on some tags to show your opinion of the book and it’s totally anonymous.

    Like “ten pounds of crap in a five pound sack” or “useless”…not that I’m trying to influence your opinion of the book, mind you.

  29. Blue Raven said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:26

    <blockquoteYou spend your time playing out a grudge against me on Amazon

    Anne Rice? Laurell K. Hamilton? Dick Cheney?

  30. tigrismus said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:27

    Rudeness is the human condition. I just try to recognize the ways I need to do better, and try really hard.

    So it’s a rudeness “how to” guide, then?

  31. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:29

    Indeed, actor, one might even add one’s own tag anonymously, such as “i see single-digit sales.” Yet I can’t help but feel that her blood will be on our hands if she slits her wrists. (Although I suppose most of it will be on her hands, and perhaps forearms.) She seems dangerously unstable.

  32. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:31

    Yet I can’t help but feel that her blood will be on our hands if she slits her wrists.

    She’d have to bite a virgin’s neck first.

  33. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:32

    Why, look what I just found in the tags list!

    i see single-digit sales(2)

  34. actor212 said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:34

    a soon-to-be-remaindered how-to paperback currently busting the top of the Amazon charts at #65,682.

    Um, TinTin?

    Sorry…it’s Amazon.com Sales Rank: #96,347 in Books now

    Just thought you’d like to see how in the span of an hour or so of your posting, her fortunes have changed.

  35. Sir Ellis P. Worthington III, Esq. said,

    February 17, 2010 at 23:59

    So, I’m loving the cover they went with on the book. Totally illustrates the lack of an Adam’s Apple.

    Of course, photoshop, etc…

  36. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 0:01

    She’s such a misanthrope. I wrote a 2-star bash of her crappy book, so just give me lots of “Helpfuls” and she’ll be sure to see it.

  37. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 0:05

    On it, Loretta!

  38. Jim/The Velvet Blog said,

    February 18, 2010 at 0:52

    A book I ghostwrote is currently #7,264,045. Woo hoo!

  39. Smut Clyde said,

    February 18, 2010 at 1:05

    I can take a pill, with almost no side-effects for me, apparently (according to an epidemiologist friend)

    She needs an epidemiologist friend to tell her that she has apparently taken a pill? Or that she is having almost no side-effects?
    If you’re consulting friends as to whether you are showing side-effects, IT’S PROBABLY TOO LATE.

  40. Jim/The Velvet Blog said,

    February 18, 2010 at 1:08

    Alkon’s book is now at #102,655.

    Um… how is it falling so swiftly? I don’t get it.

  41. SoulCatcher said,

    February 18, 2010 at 1:17

    Someone needs to write a semi-glowing review of the book where they refer to Alkon using male gender language eg.

    I could not help but enjoy Mr. Alkon’s great treatise on how to be rude. His vulgar words throughout the book give me some new material to use when talking to the women of the night on the nearby street corner…

  42. Mr. Wonderful said,

    February 18, 2010 at 1:21

    The Amazon ratings are only minimally meaningful. You can sell one copy and go from 1,44,987 to 433,211. And back again the next day.

    As for Alkon, the wife and I are friends with her agent, so I’ll maintain a dignified silence. Although the statement “we all are (rude)” is half projection, half commercial hustling.

    The final irony–that a person who advertises herself as an expert on advice, on social behavior, and on proper deportment is herself constantly under attack for her writing and behavior–is so ironic it’s not even ironic. She seems to confuse “being socially astute” with “being opinionated.” I’ve actually learned things reading Miss Manners. Just the idea of reading Alkon gives me hives of the mind.

  43. Dhalgren said,

    February 18, 2010 at 1:35

    Thank you, Loretta and Simply Left Behind / Actor212. Great work!

  44. OTB said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:05

    Waah, my beautiful comment got spammed, wtf?

  45. KWillow said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:26

    “. . . she should have a kid. Then again, I wouldn’t wish that on the kid. . .”

    Or the world. The kid would be just like her.

  46. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:29

    Someone needs to write a semi-glowing review of the book where they refer to Alkon using male gender language eg.

    Ahem

  47. Esteev said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:48

    Loretta, actor, great work. I went to the comments page of Arnie’s book and there you guys are: one and two, not respectfully.

    I would like to point out actor’s “a large dollop of ego” comment which made me piss my pants. I have new pants on now.

  48. Esteev said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:54

    On a similar note: one commenter, who enjoys Arnie’s column, had this to say:

    “I love how Amy can write really smart stuff and at the same time use terms like ‘buttwads’”

    “Really smart stuff” is such a really smart stuff to say, I must say; which I just did. Furthermore, “buttwads” is not funny anymore. That is lifted from Bart Simpson and any 5th grader with an attitude. Full disclosure here: I haven’t and will never read Arnie’s books so I this is Assuming Esteev talking but, I can’t imagine calling someone a “buttwad” in a polite way.

  49. Hatchepsut said,

    February 18, 2010 at 2:59

    What I love is Amazon’s claim that many people who bought Mr. Alkon’s book also bought “Going Rogue.” Okay, so I’m Captain Slow, but I really did not see that coming…

  50. montag said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:13

    Nothing like a little Ritalin to bring out the passive-aggressive shrieking harpy in a gal (or fella, as the case may be).

  51. Lesley said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:14

    aw, don’t be mean. Amy spent three whole years writing the diatribe before it hit #65bazillionth on Amazon.

    A thought though. Without all those rude people, would she have the book she can’t live off of now? I think not.

  52. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:15

    I’m the hapless Amazon reviewer “SED” who opened this latest vortex of recursive irony and first let me say, love the reviews. I’m so inside my NPR bubble that I didn’t know who A…y/d was, and mistook her for a sane person after briefly flipping through her book. Say what you will, I was severely distracted…a visit to her blog cleared that up, and the resulting 10+ comments left in response to my review are too classic to make up. Amazon took it down but s/he’s excerpted them on the blog: http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2010/02/14/too_fat_to_fly.html#comments

    I’m happy to share the whole string with anyone who cares, but the rest of her stuff is almost as ironically ironical and equally batshit — which kinda makes me think she’s too fragile an easy target to even engage with…

    Thing is, seems like Mr. Wonderful’s friend her agent (no disrespect to M. W., whose comments are wonderful) and her publisher have worked hard to mask the deeper crazy behind some artful editing and lure people to her blog. (The title alone should be a tip-off, but even slow folks like me might deserve a bit of warning before handing over our IP address). If her behavior keeps escalating, this might constitute aiding and abetting a public menace.

    Happy ending for me, having emerged from my cave and stumbled on S, N which is more than worth it. But someone might want to tip off her publisher before a lawsuit inevitably erupts.

  53. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:23

    Almost forgot! In the two-hour time frame of AA’s serial commenting, the price of her book on Amazon went down by about $1 – from $12-something to $11-something

  54. Lesley said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:23

    Amy Alkon writes “In my spare time, I give free advice to people who have nowhere else to turn, people whose letters will never make my column, and speak to “at-risk” kids to demystify making it.”

    Imagine feeling wowsies because you got a response from an Internet nobody whose stupid column your letter will never show up in. Now that’s a sad life right there. My free advice to at risk people who have nowhere to turn is, avoid Amy’s free advice stand.

  55. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:37

    Getting “parenting” advice from a non-parent like Alkon (or Ann Coulter, for that matter) would be tantamount to getting investing advice from a bag lady.

  56. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 3:58

    mistook her for a sane person after briefly flipping through her book

    Hee hee! I think “she’s too fragile an easy target to even engage with…” is absolutely true, alas.

  57. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    February 18, 2010 at 4:08

    I just try to recognize the ways I need to do better, and try really hard.

    Hm. Pity about the low sales and all – if you could make money off of writing about your willfully unaddressed shortcomings, I reckon I could do a trilogy.

    But the market would probably be pretty crowded.

  58. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 4:15

    thanks tigrismus…alas, indeed, but someone should maybe warn the unwitting day-walkers — and also Satoshi Kanizawa — who risk their reputations by endorsing her

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/201001/applied-evolutionary-psychology-its-best

  59. Smut Clyde said,

    February 18, 2010 at 4:45

    Satoshi Kanizawa — who risk their reputations by endorsing her
    Presumably in the course of human evolution there has been some evolutionary advantage to behaviours like endorsing misguided advice from a low-attention-span loudmouth, or Kanizawa would not be doing it. So why fight genetics?

  60. Hatchepsut said,

    February 18, 2010 at 4:57

    I thought Mr. Alkon’s advice always boiled down to just three precepts: don’t get married; don’t have children; and men are going to stray after nubile younger ladies, so women should just resign themselves to being alone.

    Now, didn’t Arnold have a longtime boyfriend? I wonder, did he ever dump the aging Mr. Alkon for a younger, more nubile lady? I mean, that is what evolutionary psychology has programmed him to do, right? Or have they prehaps agreed to some kind of open relationship, where he spreads his seed and Arnold stays home and knits toaster cozies?

  61. Honus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 4:57

    “Unmasking people who behave badly, like this woman trying to hurt the sales of a book she clearly has not read, is precisely what I’m all about. ”

    So revenge is good manners now?

    Didn’t Amy recently write a column about how she was really nice person and then proceeded to talk about stiffing a waitress who had brought he a more well-done burger than she wanted? And now she’s an authority on polite society?

  62. Spengler Dampniche remembered his nym said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:06

    Oi Tintin, are you French, a fag, or both? We have a bet going, and I stand to make a quick twenty.
    Rupees, but they’re worth something these days.

  63. Spengler Dampniche remembered his nym said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:10

    Amy would grab you by the neck and smash your face in the spilled gravy until your nose is broken, then scoop your blood into the dish and loudly ask who wants to try your bloody gravy.

    Jesus, what a ghastly image. I want to use that in my next book.

  64. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:13

    This is one classy lady. I don’t understand why you looney libs take her to task for acting like such a cunt.

  65. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:14

    Amy Alkon writes “In my spare time, I give free advice to people who have nowhere else to turn, people whose letters will never make my column, and speak to “at-risk” kids to demystify making it.”

    In my spare time, I build shit moats for the disadvantaged.

    I like to give advice to people who can’t think for themselves, also. And thusly.

  66. Spengler Dampniche remembered his nym said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:15

    Seeing as I have the comments to myself, I just checked… My novel, which doesn’t come out until September, is at 1,007,902 on Amazon. I am now praying it beats her ranking before it comes out. Just for one day. That would be sweet.

  67. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:18

    From Alkon’s blog post about Kevin Smith:

    I thought twice about putting on Opium this morning – my favorite perfume, because I don’t want to torture anyone on an airplane.

    Must suck to be so codependent that you hinge your every decision on what a stranger might think.

    There’s good behavior, then there’s “got beat by my alokonholic father” codependency that gets projected onto everyone you meet. For everything else, there’s normal behavior.

  68. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:19

    Little known fact: Amy has a tattoo of a butt, shaped like a butt, on her butt.

  69. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:25

    ME THINKS THIS GUY HAS A CRUSH.
    Also, shit moats.

  70. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:25

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/201001/applied-evolutionary-psychology-its-best

    Um, that guy. WTF. FUWP.

  71. Spengler Dampniche remembered his nym said,

    February 18, 2010 at 5:37

    I guess I don’t have the comments to myself.

  72. Lesley said,

    February 18, 2010 at 6:07

    Opium perfume is so eighties, like Amy’s hairstyle.

    It also stinks.

  73. Lesley said,

    February 18, 2010 at 6:09

    ME THINKS THIS GUY HAS A CRUSH

    wait til he opens amy’s underpants and finds a wangdoodle.

    not that there’s anything wrong with that. to each his own.

  74. stackozone said,

    February 18, 2010 at 6:21

    As an example of Mr Alkon’s mental state regarding other people’s fucking lack of manners and their shitty attitudes, I give you this:

    Tim,

    How dare you call me at home with a recorded message? I am on the Do Not Call list, and I value my privacy. You woke me up in the middle of my nap during my deadline. Consider this an invoice for disturbing me: $63.20, which is my hourly rate for writing, since I’ll probably lose at least an hour thanks to your interruption. I’ll now try to go back to sleep so I can get my writing done.

    I’m considering reporting you to the California Attorney General. Have a bad day.

    —Amy Alkon

    As an example of Mr Alkon’s mental state regarding other people’s fucking lack of manners and their shitty attitudes, I give you this:

    Tim,

    How dare you call me at home with a recorded message? I am on the Do Not Call list, and I value my privacy. You woke me up in the middle of my nap during my deadline. Consider this an invoice for disturbing me: $63.20, which is my hourly rate for writing, since I’ll probably lose at least an hour thanks to your interruption. I’ll now try to go back to sleep so I can get my writing done.

    I’m considering reporting you to the California Attorney General. Have a bad day.

    —Amy Alkon

    Hourly rate for writing what? And he’s napping in the middle of a deadline? I’m sure the hour of lost time is all due to her foaming at the mouth, roaming her house, screaming at the walls, ripping her clothes, and slamming her head against the walls, because she got a recorded phone call, in the middle of the day.

    I can really see how that daily ritalin fix has had no effect on Mr Alkon’s brain chemical content and ratios.

    And how his writing apparently occurs while he sleeps.
    Hourly rate for writing what? And he’s napping in the middle of a deadline? I’m sure the hour of lost time is all due to her foaming at the mouth, roaming her house, screaming at the walls, ripping her clothes, and slamming her head against the walls, because she got a recorded phone call, in the middle of the day.

    I can really see how that daily ritalin fix has had no effect on Mr Alkon’s brain chemical content and ratios.

    And how his writing apparently occurs while he sleeps.

  75. gocart mozart said,

    February 18, 2010 at 6:42

    My first Amazon reveiw. What do y’all think?

    Good Advice Amy, February 17, 2010
    By gocart mozart – See all my reviews

    This book will provide usefull advice to anyone who has the misfortune of confronting such rude AS***LES, C**TS and R****DS on a daily basis.

    One small speck of criticism that I would give to this wonderfull new author Amy Alkon is that she should visualise a circle of steaming dog crap around herself whenever she is confronted with such uncivilized behavior by her lessers. This tactic seems to do wonders for my coping ability and helps me to get it through the day with less than half of a bottle of gin.

  76. Interrobang said,

    February 18, 2010 at 7:04

    Having been in the whole ADD subculture for years, I can pretty well vouch for the fact that it ain’t the Ritalin makes you an asshole — in fact, it’ll make an asshole less of an asshole — but the asshole has to be an asshole in the first place for there to be assholery involved. Asshole. Too. Also.

    I’d fucking hate to find out what sie’s like off hir meds — I mean, sie’s that bad while medicated, and going off the drugs only makes it worse. A distractable asshole with no sense of social propriety is a nightmare.

  77. dizzy said,

    February 18, 2010 at 8:50

    More than I want to know really –

    Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought

    Evil Genes: Why Rome Fell, Hitler Rose, Enro… by Barbara A. Oakley
    So Sue Me, Jackass!: Avoiding Legal Pitfal… by Amy Epstein Feldman
    The Little Black Book of Violence: What Every Youn… by Kris Wilder
    Your Hate Mail Will Be Graded: A Decade of Whateve… by John Scalzi
    Sawzall The Hatchet Reciprocating Saw Milwaukee 6524-21

  78. Grace Nearing said,

    February 18, 2010 at 9:23

    Sawzall The Hatchet Reciprocating Saw Milwaukee 6524-21

    I’ll tell you, nobody ever argues with a Sawzall — or not for very long, anyway.

  79. lobbey said,

    February 18, 2010 at 11:49

    I’d fucking hate to find out what sie’s like off hir meds — I mean, sie’s that bad while medicated, and going off the drugs only makes it worse. A distractable asshole with no sense of social propriety is a nightmare.

    I was thinking that too, Mrs lobbey used to work with ADD teens, and when they weren’t on Ritalin some of them were nightmares. As a general point, she seems such an angry person, so full of rage. perhaps writing a book like this has cathartic (sic?) purposes. But its obviously not helping.

    In a way, I kind of feel sorry for her, but I can also see the law knocking on her door, sooner, rather than later.

  80. OTB said,

    February 18, 2010 at 16:27

    This is a classic example of the Narcissist-As-Victim. Human vampires like Alkon are always “under siege”–they feed off the negative attention as much as the positive.

    Alkon should rent a copy of The Secret and think long and hard about why she’s attracting these sorts of people to her. She might also want to think about why she’s so unoriginal that she has to rip off crappy movie lines for her book titles.

  81. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 16:38

    My novel, which doesn’t come out until September, is at 1,007,902 on Amazon

    Oh yea????

    Well, MY novel, which I haven’t even written yet, is already at 1,010,743!

  82. Not actually Air Chief Marshal Sir Graham Eric "Jock" Stirrup GCB, AFC, FRAeS, RAF said,

    February 18, 2010 at 16:57

    Things are very quiet right now. Too quiet for my nerves. Is Arnold keeping her powder dry, preparing all her forces for an overwhelming 3AM counterattack? I don’t want to wake up tomorrow into a world of shit she created over night. Or does the silence represent surrender?

  83. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:14

    Chief, I think he shot his wad on Tuesday, for which he must pay us back for the hamburger he has today.

  84. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:23

    dash it all, i couldn’t resist. the public must be warned, even if only in an amazon comments thread they will never see:

    http://www.amazon.com/review/R3I0DMQ6G3KQSX/ref=cm_cr_rev_detmd_pl?ie=UTF8&cdMsgNo=2&cdPage=1&cdSort=oldest&cdMsgID=Mx1M9TV5FNAUF9U#Mx1M9TV5FNAUF9U

    absolute all-time favorite passage of http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/201001/applied-evolutionary-psychology-its-best

    Don’t. Fuck. With. Amy. Alkon. If you do, you will be sorry, and you will pay for it. But Alkon is far from mean and vengeful; in fact, she’s a tremendously warm and compassionate human being.

    “Hitler was actually really nice to Goebbels, who received several promotions”

    Not actually…RAF, I think her publishers got to her and/or the dialog is happening in some dark corner of “we’re not listening” — looks like she’s filtering new reviews altogether on Amazon.

  85. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:51

    Loretta’s review is a thing of beauty.

  86. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:56

    SED,

    The response, which I posted, really is a slam-dunk:

    It’s “rude” to not allow someone to smear you anonymously?

    In a word, yes. Arnold Alkon is a public figure. Bookworm is entitled to the protections of privacy, since she has not sought publicity and indeed actively hid her identity for precisely the reasons Arnold’s actions highlight.

    Any lawyer can tell you that, Internet protocols be damned.

  87. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:57

    Pardon me, I had to edit that for clarity. Here’s the edited post:

    “It’s “rude” to not allow someone to smear you anonymously?”

    In a word, yes. Arnold Alkon is a public figure who has published a book and gone out of her way to achieve some notoriety for her writings.

    Bookworm is entitled to the protections of privacy, since she has not sought publicity and indeed actively hid her identity for precisely the reasons Arnold’s actions highlight.

    Any lawyer can tell you that, Internet protocols be damned.

  88. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 17:59

    Loretta’s review is a thing of beauty.

    it is, as is actor’s must-read. so much love for this thread.

  89. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:02

    Alkon’s minions are on it. Obviously, mine is the most dangerous post since they seem to have concentrated their efforts on it.

  90. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:05

    By the way, kudos to whomever thought up this tag:

    verbal onanism

  91. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:05

    actor, my hero, your latest masterpiece didn’t live to see the light of amazon:

    SED,
    Do what I did: report it to Amazon. Nothing would be sweeter than to see Arnold Alkon banned from the site that she’s humping her book thru. It would kill her to see all our reviews of her pathetic attempts to “write” about manners.
    It’s like a vacuum cleaner writing about how to be a fan: it only works when she blows it out her ass.

  92. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:06

    p.s. oops our posts crossed.

  93. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:11

    SED,

    I didn’t expect that one to pass muster, but it was a warning to Amy.

  94. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:15

    It’s hilarious that Mr. Alkon seems engaged in a mutual admiration society with this oher fella who writes for Psychology Today, Satoshi Kanazawa.

    Mr. Alkon praises not just Kanazawa’s review, but lauds Kanazawa personally in his Amazon scrawlings.

    Now I got nuttin’ against the cross-dressing kink; lord knows this Alkonholic’s been there before, but I’m of a mind that one should own their kink; be responsible for it. Alkon claims to be a responsible man, so let’s encourage him to embrace himself in an act of self-love.

  95. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:15

    one hopes, actor. good times.

  96. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:20

    The fun part is, Arnold can’t do a damn thing about it. She’s stewing in her juices…and if that’s not the most nauseating image, I don’t know what beats it…and the best she can do is play on level ground. I already reported her post outting Bookworm so she’s going to have to play extra nice or be banned.

  97. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:22

    I deal with some of the anti-drug paranoia surrounding my own ingestion of Ritalin.

    The fact that she’s dating an inanimate carbon rod probably doesn’t help her, either.

  98. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:27

    She’s stewing in her juices…and if that’s not the most nauseating image, I don’t know what beats it

    Stewing in her juices…behind a SHIT MOAT!

  99. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:28

    juices

    effective metaphor, disturbing visual

    I already reported her post outting Bookworm so she’s going to have to play extra nice or be banned.

    i “reported” all of Arnie’s comments that outright violated amazon’s policy as written, in the sense that i clicked that box. i’m dubious as to whether they’re paying attention to our little microdrama.

  100. InsaneInTheCheneyBrain said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:29

    a statement that for a book written by someone who’s mother tongue is Serbian

    This should be “whose”. I wouldn’t have mentioned it, but the sentence in question is about grammar errors.

  101. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:36

    aw, already gone. here’s my prequel to actor’s rude…protocols be damned

    Yup, it really is “rude.” Yes, everyone has figured out that getting hold of your personal information is just as easy these days as crouching in your hedges, looking through your window. It’s not so much a question of *can* you, as *would* you.

    Most of us don’t bother to hide our IP with a free proxy while we surf the web — broadcasting one’s IP to a host is the virtual equivalent of handing the site’s administrator a business card. My experience visiting Alkon’s site was akin to handing an author my card at a book party, only to realize moments too late that she may well be dangerously unstable.

    Book promoters and publishers often deliberately drive traffic to an author’s website, in order to sell more books – occasionally they target potential buyers not already exhaustively familiar with the author’s work. That marketing strategy might be ill-advised for this particular book.

  102. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:38

    I’m surprised they hid that one, SED, but then votes for some reason matter in comments. Not sure why.

    Still, it’s nice to see that Amy’s minions are cowards.

    I’ll let this rest a few days, then re-assault the thread.

  103. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:58

    Sawzall The Hatchet Reciprocating Saw Milwaukee 6524-21

    JanusNode is going to be put out of business by Lowe’s.

  104. mac said,

    February 18, 2010 at 18:59

    Thank god she has a blawg

    From Amy’s Mall
    Hi, I’m Amy Alkon, and this is my store. Please buy stuff through my links so I won’t starve to death as all the newspapers carrying me are going out of business.

  105. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 19:04

    I’m surprised they hid that one, SED

    the review stated directly it’s not about the book content, but rather the author’s behavior — i suspect that’s how she could reconcile its censorship with her supposed “i welcome all genuine commentary, good and bad” policy

    I’ll let this rest a few days, then re-assault the thread.

    i’m staying tuned.

  106. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 19:07

    I wonder if they hooked Arnold’s comment, the one that outted Bookworm?

  107. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:09

    How f-ing pathetic are you people? I’m really, really hoping this is some Jr High blog with a bunch of kids pretending they’re adults-although that rather insults teens to suggest they’d act this way. One person in your clique decides they don’t like someone, and they rest of you go skipping off to do your pathetic anonymous best to harm their livelihood like lemmings brainless over a cliff?

    Go back to bitching and moaning about the left’s loss in Mass, and leave the people who actually have jobs alone to earn their money.

    And you’ll notice, and probably mock, that I don’t hide behind false anonymity. Get a life people. Maybe, even, a job!

  108. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:11

    Oh, and I’m curious, since the left is “supposed” to be all pro-gay and all, why you would use “tranny” as an insult? Transgendered people don’t have an easy time in this world, for you to use it like their plight is an insult is the height of stupid boorishness.

  109. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:24

    You’re very rude, “Farrar.” Perhaps you should read Arnold’s book.

  110. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:24

    How f-ing pathetic are you people?

    Not pathetic enough to euphemize “fucking”. See ya!

  111. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:25

    Rusty, truly, you’d think Arnold would rub up off on his readership!

  112. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:27

    Wow. Do you think we made Arnold cry?

    Why else would she direct her minions to skip off and do his pathetic anonymous best to harm our livelihood?

  113. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:27

    Ah, good. Very pathetic. Does it makes you feel less pathetic if I write out fucking? Good, I’ll do that.

    I am rude to asshats. I’ve read her book, but don’t need lessons on manners towards scum.

    Oh, and Mr “I have a book coming out…”, you do realize that while Amy would never counterattack you, others might, just for fun, on your own book? Of course, I rather doubt there will be a book, but if there is I find it surprising you would give people motivation to do harm to your own sales.

  114. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:29

    Actor, what have you been in? Anything I would know? Anything anyone would know? I doubt it, since you’re not listed anywhere in anything, so I’m curious how you decided to define yourself as “actor”?

    I’m not an Amy minion, by the way, I stumbled on to you via your “reviews”. Thank you also for leading me to her blog. I like it. There is no such thing as bad press seems to be true!

  115. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:37

    Does it makes you feel less pathetic if I write out fucking?

    Doesn’t make a goddamn bit of difference to me. I figured it would embarass the fuck out of you.

    Which was the point.

  116. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:39

    Jesus, the woman has made a habit of outing people, tracking them down and actually, personally trying to sabotage their careers and make them miserable, but posting sarcastic things in Amazon reviews are beyond the pale? Holy fuck.

  117. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:43

    Tig,

    Subtlety is lost on the likes of Farrar…who might note that I haven’t lifted a finger to “research” him, only to find that he’s chosen to cyberstalk me.

    Nice crowd Arnold attracts!

  118. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:43

    Thank you also for leading me to her blog. I like it. There is no such thing as bad press seems to be true!

    So you personally believe these poor reviews have actually worked to help her? Will you shut the fuck up about harming her livelihood then?

  119. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:49

    Well, Tig, in fairness, her book was lingering in the mid-100K range and now is up to the sparkling 55K range! That means she sold ONE WHOLE BOOK since we charged over there!

    WOOHOO! Now she can kick our profits back to us! What are you going to do with your share? Buy a shitmoat? A new gown from Trannies Max?

    I know that’s where I’m headed. I have a Carmen Miranda gown on lay-away.

  120. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:53

    I’m almost out of gum, but you know I’d really love a bag of chips.

  121. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:57

    Amy’s army of three (four?) have been speed-dialed to write a 5-star glowing review to bump out our reviews. However, one of her pals accused me of not being qualified to write a book review, despite the fact that I have written 20 book reviews and have a book on Amazon for sale (for real!) and am a published author and playwright.

    So, I guess you’re only qualified to write a review if you like the book.

    I, too (also!) read the excerpt and had already seen the entire chapter on telemarketers from an ebook download. Since I’m not a regular commenter in this site, it is obvious that I joined this comment section to express my opinion of her and her book. I even use my real name.

  122. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:01

    actor, you’ve entirely forgotten to be baited by farrar’s flaccid arguments and defensively list your full name, credit card numbers, and entire life’s accomplishments so s/he may pick them apart in some effort to bully the sane out of you. in keeping with the junior-high level of wit over here.

    falling….into….vortex….again….

  123. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:02

    loretta post the link to your book. for real, your arnold review is so fucking good i want to buy the book right now – backlink please…

  124. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:06

    SED,

    No biggie. My stock answer is “If you want my resume, call my agent.”

    If he’s that thorough at stalking, he’ll find out who that is.

    Loretta, I noticed that too. It only seems that you can write a review if it’s G L O W I N G in admiration for the book.

    This is why I flagged her book for Amazon. Also why I’m flabbergasted that someone who fights fire with fire can’t stand the heat of a few scorchings.

  125. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:08

    I read enough of her book to put it down. I won’t say how I got a copy (it wasn’t a present and I didn’t have to pay for it), but I did read a bit of it.

  126. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:11

    Also why I’m flabbergasted that someone who fights fire with fire can’t stand the heat of a few scorchings

    actually that makes perfect sense — unbridled rage is often a form of self-protection, which is why those who dish out the most usually can’t take anything in the least.

    i’d say let’s ask kanizawa about this, but it’s day here — he’s probably squatting in arnie’s coffin

  127. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:15

    “Farrar” seems upset, and a tad unstable. Maybe we should take it easy on her.

  128. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:16

    Stone Cold Guilty

    My current blog is linked to my name.

  129. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:17

    i may have forgetten to transition out of snark mode earlier…i am genuinely interested in loretta’s book, but can’t find the link for it, or are we anticipating another war of the reviews? i’m sure your work stands on its own merit, trolls notwithstanding

  130. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:18

    outstanding, thanks – love true crime

  131. Not actually Air Chief Marshal Sir Graham Eric "Jock" Stirrup GCB, AFC, FRAeS, RAF said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:19

    farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 18, 2010 at 21:09 (kill)

    How f-ing pathetic are you people? I’m really, really hoping this is some Jr High blog with a bunch of kids pretending they’re adults,,,,

    That’s all I needed to hear out of you. Pervert. Go get counseling before Stone Phillips catches up with you.

  132. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:24

    Loretta, you seem to have made many enemies over the course of your life.

    I like that in my friends! What was it Alice Roosevelt said, “If you have nothing nice to say, sit next to me”?

  133. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:26

    “Farrar” seems upset, and a tad unstable.

    In fairness, she seems to be on a downward spiral into pathos and shame. First, she’s pathetic enough not to be honest about her feelings and using the “f-ing” euphemism, then even MORE pathetically, when called on it, she uses the actual word “fucking”!

    I wonder, if I dared Farrar to jump off the Empire State Building to prove she’s not pathetic, would she be pathetic enough to actually do it????

  134. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:34

    well actor, when you’re daring people to jump off the Empire State Building, you should step out of the ether and say it to their FACE with your real name!

    that said, is it fair to bait the criminally insane into suicide attempts that will most likely succeed?

  135. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:38

    Farrar, Darling, look – this blog is just run by a bunch of howling liberals who can’t take a joke when it comes from someone as fabulous as Amy. Uh Arnold.

    Case in point – why get upset when Arnold simply made a comment about black women and their litters of pups, uh babies? I don’t know what the big deal is. Black women have lots of kids, usually by drug dealers and other swarth types. Arnold was brave enough to call them out. See? http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/10661.html

    Also, it’s perfectly OK to spend massive amounts of time obsessing…uh, detecting mean people who post comments on your blog. Because everyone would do that if they could, not just self-entitled rich white women, uh, men.

  136. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:44

    Loretta, you seem to have made many enemies over the course of your life.

    Ones who spell really, really badly. Seriously, “blook?” “Garabage?”

  137. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:45

    @SED – Ha! Enemies? More like mutts. Before Amazon changed the review process -where you had to actually buy something from Amazon before you could post a review – there were 20 trolls or so who came in and posted numerous 1-star reviews to my book. It was hilarious.

    I had a blog for years that attracted more than my fair share of trolls. Note the number of 1-star reviewers who have never reviewed any book before or since!

    If you really want a copy of my book, I’d be happy to send you a free PDF version. It’s not as if I make much money on it. The average non-fiction book on Amazon makes less than $1 in royalties for the author, so Amy is not getting rich on the Amazon sales. She probably got an advance and will not get another cent.

  138. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:47

    felonious grammar:

    It’s author is felon of assault of a pregnant woman.

  139. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:48

    Actually, “Blook” is a stupid name for a blog turned into a book. My “blook” was a 2006 Non-Fiction Blooker Award Finalist. It was beat by another blog turned into a book (and movie), “Julie and Julia.”

    So, while I was beaten by a cook-blook, at least Meryl Streep starred in the movie of the winner. I don’t feel so bad!

  140. Complacent said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:49

    What goes around comes around, assholes. You’re going to regret doing this. Promise.

  141. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:51

    I thought “blook” was a typo.

  142. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:53

    Yeah, I though it was, too, considering how well most of the 1-star reviewers wrote.

  143. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:54

    What goes around comes around, assholes.

    I sense a goatse fetish here.

    (LInk may not be safe for work…or people with faint hearts)

  144. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:54

    [This comment, with personal information about another commenter, was removed by Tintin.]

  145. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:54

    By the way, how ironic is that someone named Arnold “Complacent” is posting threats to take action?

  146. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:57

    If you really want a copy of my book, I’d be happy to send you a free PDF version.

    loretta, that’s kind of you but i’ve already bought a copy in the spirit of camaraderie, and as a curiosity because you really do resemble sarah palin sans the wild-eyed snake charmed look (see loretta’s blog). i also enjoy true crime.

    btw i think you’re quoting actor but i’m with him on this — the loathed of my loathed are the best dinner guests

  147. A concerned citizen said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:58

    Taking cheap-shots at people with ADHD is fucking bullshit. I love this place, but sorry, this is the least funny as well as the douchiest thing that’s been on Sadly, No in a year or two.

    It really chaps my ass I need to explain this, but if you have ADHD and you take a stimulant (especially one you’ve been on for close to 10 years), it makes you less hyper and erratic, not more. That’s the freaking point.

    [Tintin adds: Amy doesn't claim to have ADHD. Ritalin has not been approved as, or studied as, a treatment for adult ADHD. The only approved medication for ADHD for adults is Stratterra.]

  148. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 22:59

    Now, now, Alkonholics…I know you’re a stranger to these parts and are used to Arnold Alkon’s modality, but we have rules about posting private and personal information about other commentors here.

    I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask the powers that be to remove that comment.

    Oh, look! A chicken!

  149. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:01

    Concerned,

    You’ll note that she makes no claim of having ADHD, just that it helps her focus and soem nonsense about “drug paranoia.”

    I think it would be irresponsible not to speculate that she takes it recreationally and without legitimate reason.

  150. Mark D said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:05

    One person in your clique decides they don’t like someone

    Actually, everyone in our clique doesn’t like this someone.

    But thanks for sharing your very special kind of stupid with us.

    Now go run along unless you want a wedgie — us teenagers need to be amused, after all …

  151. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:05

    Taking cheap-shots at people with ADHD is fucking bullshit.

    agreed. i, for one, have been taking cheap shots at outrageous justifications for bad behavior. but point taken.

  152. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:10

    Ms. Alkon has found the time in her busy day of napping to respond to my book review:

    This woman is no objective reviewer. She brags at SadlyNo.com about bashing my book, making it clear she’s really reviewing me as a person– a person guilty of the crime of not sharing the (gag) “progressive” political views of the tiny thugs on this site:

    Here’s her sadlyno comment about what she’s done here:

    http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/28623.html#comment-1028751
    loretta said,
    February 18, 2010 at 0:01
    She’s such a misanthrope. I wrote a 2-star bash of her crappy book, so just give me lots of “Helpfuls” and she’ll be sure to see it.

    Amazingly, she’s actually written a book herself, but thinks it’s appropriate to try to destroy another author’s livelihood as part of a mob of adults who behave like awful seventh-grade girls. Disgusting.

    Again, these are not independent reviewers, but mob members coming over to try to damage my livelihood. It’s a very small and evil person who does such a thing, trying to tear down what others have built.

    Here’s a review by Dr. Satoshi Kanazawa, of the London School of Economics, first published in the journal Evolutionary Psychology, and later posted on PsychologyToday, that accurately reflects the science, humor, and writing in my book….

    ~~~~~~~~~

    My response to her:

    Ms. Alkon, I don’t even know what your political views are, nor do I care. Where have you seen anything about politics in my book review? I reviewed the book, gave my opinion of your writing – which I consider misanthropic, mean-spirited and narrow. The research is unoriginal and contrived. You simply justify your behavior, which is as rude or even more destructive than the behavior your deplore. Two wronger-wrongs don’t make a right, as it were.

    I seriously doubt that my little review will “destroy” your livelihood; look at how successful Ann Coulter is in writing mean books about people. Obviously, there is a market for it. I don’t find it enlightening, helpful or funny. I really wish I could have found it funny, because I really enjoy a good parody, satire or snark. Your book is a fail in that regard.

  153. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:12

    I like it that she calls the people in here “tiny thugs.”

    Thanks SED for your support! I think the book is overpriced on Amazon. Sorry for that. Let me know what you think of the book. Cheers!

  154. tsam said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:13

    farrar stowe-sanchez said,
    February 18, 2010 at 21:11
    Oh, and I’m curious, since the left is “supposed” to be all pro-gay and all, why you would use “tranny” as an insult? Transgendered people don’t have an easy time in this world, for you to use it like their plight is an insult is the height of stupid boorishness.

    Well now, I must thank you for placing the ball on a tee for me.
    Yes, the left is all pro-gay and whatnot, which draws the distinction between a joke that is actually a joke, and blatant homophobia hiding behind the mask of a joke. Are you keeping up with me here? That’s why us crazy leftists support such radical ideas as gays/lesbians being free to marry like the rest of us, and why we are constantly carrying on about oppressing gays. It’s very simple, really. We support the right of ALL Americans and view each person to be created equal, endowed … with certain inalienable rights…an so on and so forth.

    So yeah, if we want to crack a joke, maybe even call a homophobic jackass gay, we’ve earned the right to do that, since I have BEEN out on the street marching with them to stop the oppression gays face every day.

    But hey, be concerned, concern troll. If you feel that’s doing your part, then get on down with your bad self.

  155. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:18

    I jumped ugly on her as well.

    Hi Arnold! It’s nice to see you lurking Sadly, No!

    How’s the shitmoat?

  156. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:21

    Thanks SED for your support!

    i was rash, i should have just paypaled money directly to you for the pdf. but at least this way i can post a review on amazon, without risk of you coming to my house and bashing my head in. phew…

  157. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:24

    So yeah, if we want to crack a joke, maybe even call a homophobic jackass gay, we’ve earned the right to do that, since I have BEEN out on the street marching with them to stop the oppression gays face every day.

    Wait. We only had to march?????

    I ruined a perfectly good pair of kneepads!

  158. Alkonholics, Untie! said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:25

    Sorry Tintin. I guess I got carried away.

  159. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:30

    Dammit! I knew I was supposed to report something!

  160. loretta said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:30

    SED, you still have time to cancel the order. Send me an email and I’ll send you a PDF copy of the book. The photos are better in the PDF anyway.

    My email is lorettas2@cox.net – and unlike Ms. Alton, I don’t really worry about getting spam, or crank phone calls, so fire away.

  161. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:31

    The latest little “rebuke” on the Amazon fol-der-rol (i.e, book discussion board) by Mr. Alkon to actor follows:

    “…I looked this guy up. He’s a 52-year-old man. I find that creepy and shocking, that this is how he spends his time….”

    I guess spending your time “looking up the details on 52 year old men” is not creepy if you’re a glibertarian jackass.

    Breathtaking irony – and hilarious.

  162. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:34

    Mind if I borrow that, Repig?

  163. SED the Infamous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:38

    thanks loretta, but my order is already being shipped so i’ll have to save that thought for your next publication. and alas, fun and deeply rewarding as all this is, i have to go toddle off for a while and let the rest of you dance back. bon chance, courage.

  164. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:39

    Repig, I posted a reply to Arnold and used TinTin’s Straterra info to boot.

  165. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:40

    actor:

    Borrow away. Snark is Public Property.

  166. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:46

    Two of the recurring themes in Alkon’s damaged psyche are SHIT and PEOPLE I HATE ARE ACTUALLY TINY PEOPLE.

    H/She constantly calls the sadly, no crowd “tiny thugs”, and h/she used a picture of him/herself as a giantess on his/her latest book eating tiny people. (The h/she stuff is tiring, but I’ll keep doing it since my heart bleeds so much)

    I’m not a psychologist, I ‘m just a good American Heartlander.

  167. Anonymous said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:47

    actor212 said,
    February 18, 2010 at 23:24

    Wait. We only had to march?????
    I ruined a perfectly good pair of kneepads

    HAHA! That’s hilarious! I didn’t fall for that one, actor, but it warms my …heart to see that you …pulled your weight, so to speak…

  168. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:50

    As a true-crime buff I will also need to check out Loretta’s book. (Blook?)

  169. tigrismus said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:55

    I like it that she calls the people in here “tiny thugs.”

    I find my tiny size impinges on my ability to really bring the thug. Maybe I should just post people’s IP addresses, yell at service workers while they’re working, or call people at work? You know, use technology and social mores to bully people like the tiny little thug I am?

  170. actor212 said,

    February 18, 2010 at 23:56

    By the way, TinTin, Arnold specifically pointed out the Miller post.

    You don’t think she’s doing research here, do you?

  171. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:02

    Stop me before I post again!

    Riiiiiiiiiiiiight, we should take lessons in being nice from someone who calls people at their homes and jobs, threatens their employment, cyberstalks them, and basically bullies them because, in her feeble judgment, somehow they’ve wronged her.

    Arnold, your book cover shows you as some Gojira-like giantess figure about to swallow a tiny person. Why don’t you trot that over to your therapist, or even the editors at Psychology Today, and ask them to do a little analysis of that, and then mention that anyone who disagrees with you is a “tiny thug”?

    Finally– since I disagree with you so I must be a tiny thug– eat me!

  172. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:06

    actor, I’m glad you’re posting my “insights” about Alkon over at Amazon. I can’t since I sell books thru them and thus would risk being stalked by Alkon if I posted directly on amazon.

  173. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:07

    @ actor – I’d wager she’s spent the entire day frantically Googling everyone here (including yours truly) and is clamoring for dirt. Unfortunately, she found several other women that share my name, as well as some hilarious mutt blogs published many years ago that were specifically devoted to hating on me.

    I can totally appreciate Amy’s pain right now, but whereas I was attacked for calling Scott Peterson a murderer by his anonymous groupies who stalked and harrassed me and many of my readers, she’s being critizied for her mean-spirited opinions of which she is unrepentant. She’s a typical malignant narcissist – of that I am an unfortunate expert. I wrote another book called “The Narcissist’s Handbook of Romance” that explains their entire modus operandi. While most of the narcissists I have studied are men, there are many women who fall into that category. See also: Coulter, Ann; Palin, Sarah; et al.

  174. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:08

    Loretta, your book on Peterson seems to have been universally panned. Must sting. I see Alkon is one of the 100 women bloggers to watch in 2010. What # were you? Oh, right……

    And Sarah’s got you beat by a mile. (not to mention, she doesn’t try faux-blond hair) Come on, the rest of you authors here, let’s hear the titles and see what critics (and not just Amazon trolls) thought about your work!

    Nah, I shan’t be jumping off the Empire State Building. Let me know when to come watch you do it, though!

  175. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:10

    Oh, and ya’ll get to make fun of gays and others because you “support” them? Nice. Guess I get to too. Except….I don’t make fun of people for their sexual orientation, or imply that being gay or trans is an insult. Because that’s just not good-natured, no matter what you tell yourselves…..

  176. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:12

    I see Alkon is one of the 100 women bloggers to watch in 2010.

    According to the FBI

  177. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:12

    I see Alkon is one of the 100 women bloggers to watch in 2010

    Given her history, it doesn’t surprise me that every law enforcement organization in the country has a BOLO on her.

  178. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:13

    DAMN YOU RUSTY!

  179. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:13

    Who said it was an insult, Farrah?

    In Arnold’s case, it’s quite the compliment.

  180. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:14

    I’d wager she’s spent the entire day frantically Googling everyone here

    We interrupted her “nap on deadline.”

    Bad man! Bad bad man!

  181. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:15

    While most of the narcissists I have studied are men

    We’ve met, I see.

  182. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:19

    @ farrar – If you were to actually read the 1-star reviews, you would notice something really familiar about them! Not only do they make no sense, or have anything to do with the actual book, but are merely personal attacks – misspelled, badly constructed and stupid.

    On the other hand, there were dozens of good reviews.

    I am still collecting royalties on that book. Where is your book?

    As far as being a blogger, I closed my blog in 2006 and at the time, it had over 2 million unique visitors, was written up in several newspapers (including the National Enquirer! Ha! That was hilarious!), and my book is being used as a *reference* by the District Attorneys office in several California counties.

    And, just to add another claim that your friend Amy cannot – one of my plays was produced off-Broadway (not off-off, not off-off-off, not in a little regional theater, not at the local high school) last summer.

    So, before you come in here to ridicule me, perhaps you should do your homework.

  183. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:25

    loretta said, February 19, 2010 at 0:07

    She’s a typical malignant narcissist…

    Of that you are absolutely correct. I’m doing research on narcissism and how the use of personal blogs are a growing trend to lend narcissists their voice. Arnold’s is one I’ve been tracking the last year. It often brags about how “effortlessly thin it is.” Or posts pictures of itself in tight skirts and a hat…reminds me more of the Wicked Witch of the East.

  184. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:27

    I liked farrar’s first comment on this thread, wherein s/he told us to “leave the people who actually have jobs alone to earn their money”

    farrar earns a gold star for being the 1,000,000,000th rePIG visitor to S,N! to use the extremely clever and creative rhetorical flourish of telling us to get jobs.

    The novelty of this insult never fails to sting!

  185. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:33

    farrar stowe-sanchez said, February 18, 2010 at 21:29

    I’m not an Amy minion, by the way, I stumbled on to you via your “reviews”. Thank you also for leading me to her blog. I like it.

    What a fucking liar. You’re been reading Arnold’s blog for years, momof4. Go back to making babies in Texas. And being pro-death penalty. And being pro-life.

    From Arnold’s blog:

    Wow. Just went over and scrolled through, since the baby’s down and I don’t feel like doing the dishes yet. That there are people who spend their lives on that school-yard foolishness is so very, very sad. I’d not give those losers another thought past getting Amazon to ban them.

    I did notice one of them claims to have a book coming out this fall. Most of us have lives and brains and therefor don’t bother with this nonsense, but I find it amusing that someone who’s writing will (again, theoretically) be open to this crap would stoop to doing it to another and leaving themselves open for a counterattack. Obviously, even in his rantings he realizes Amy would never do what they’re doing to her.

    I posted, in my own name (they may drop dead of shock) a little observance on their loser-ness at sadlyno.

    Posted by: momof4 at February 18, 2010 11:42 AM

  186. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:33

    If you are doing research on Narcissists, you will notice many of the characteristics are shared by Amy.

  187. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:37

    Some of the things I’ve noticed about Amy:

    casual dishonesty
    cruelty
    lack of empathy
    vain
    overly sensitive to criticism
    envious
    expects to be treated better than she treats others
    delusions of grandeur
    poorly developed sense of humor (substitutes sarcasm for comedy)
    sense of entitlement
    poorly organized

  188. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:52

    I’ll add to it just a few others:

    hypocrisy
    false sense of intelligence
    false sense of superiority
    false sense of fashion
    mean spirited

    What it often passes off as rational argument is just the same crap Cliff-noted arguments rehashed and regurgitated over the years. It’s a two-trick pony.

  189. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 0:54

    @farrar (or shall I call you momof4, the name you go by on Alkon’s blog): Yes, indeed, you are a minion.

  190. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:17

    Wow, Farrar is a mom of four already?

  191. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:26

    Does Farrar really think Sarah Palin’s hair color is real? Or even if half the hair she wears right now actually belongs to her? She takes it out every night, I assure you! She also has to get major highlights every few weeks.

    Meow.

  192. Hatchepsut said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:28

    Well, while Mr. Alkon is busy researching the commenters, I’m certainly hoping he can “dig up” a little “dirt” about me! (Sorry. Old archaeology joke–but that Howard Carter did laugh so!). Anyway, to forestall the inevitable !!!ELEVEN!!TY!!! revelations about me, I will affirm that, yes, I was indeed married to my half-brother and had a child with him.

    Oh, and if in the course of his research Arnold can confirm the DNA results on my mummy, that would be just peachy.

    Bastet rules!

  193. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:34

    love what’s happening here since i’ve been gone, and my appreciation for actor and loretta grow by the moment. see how arnold has enhanced my life?

  194. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:36

    @Alkonholics: Yup. Farrar AKA momof4 has been a regular poster on Alkon’s blog for years. She’s such a regular poster, in fact, that she first posted as momof3…until she became momof4. I know all sorts of info about her. It’s not hard to find out if you connect the dots based on her postings.

    But unlike that nasty sputum Alkon, I would never make threats about revealing farrar/momof4′s information. Other than outing her as a troll liar, that is.

    Just comes to show that there’s no artform to tracking people online, Mr. Alkon (because I know you’re reading this). And BTW, wearing formal skirts at the Grove just reveals that you don’t get out much IRL. I wouldn’t try to pass myself off as a fashion expert, which you often do. Best stick to the drivel you call “writing”.

  195. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 1:55

    off topic a bit, but since we have two experts in residence on dangerous narcissistic obsession, have yo or loretta read the gift of fear

    http://www.amazon.com/Gift-Fear-Gavin-Becker/dp/0440508835/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1266538127&sr=1-1

    and should we be evaluating our calculated risk in this context? thoughts?

  196. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 2:21

    Just comes to show that there’s no artform to tracking people online, Mr. Alkon

    She has no power with this, but she doesn’t understand it.

    There was a time, back in the 90s, maybe the early 00s, when you could conceivably have scared someone off with the threat, real or implied, of outting them.

    Doesn’t work anymore. The Internet didn’t start 20 minutes before any of us first logged on (indeed, in my case, it started about 20 minutes AFTER I first logged on, old fart that I am) so we have a pretty clear idea of what information is and is not out there about us.

    Indeed, the reason she was able to find so much “information” about me (and yes, Arnie, I know exactly what you found, to which I will merely say, “Don’t believe everything ever posted on the Internet.”) is that I allow it to be out there.

  197. Alkonholics Untie! said,

    February 19, 2010 at 2:24

    It’s not hard to find out if you connect the dots based on her postings.

    Duh. I could connect the dots based on her attitude, but I won’t repost the obvious results gleaned from googling her name and following the longitudinal shit moat.

  198. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 2:41

    I’ll just say that it’s sad when a parent dies.

  199. Doctorb said,

    February 19, 2010 at 2:50

    Yeah I don’t see anything about Ritalin causing/exacerbating narcissistic personality disorder. Maybe it’s just allowing her to be a more effective and productive narcissist.

  200. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 3:02

    Yeah, I won’t repost the results I found on FB, either, showing her to be a fan of Rush Limbaugh and Sarah Palin.

  201. Honus said,

    February 19, 2010 at 3:41

    “In my spare time, I give free advice to people who have nowhere else to turn”

    “it didn’t cost nothin’, and it was worth it, too”
    Huckleberry Finn

  202. Capn Fatback said,

    February 19, 2010 at 4:12

    By the way, kudos to whomever thought up this tag:

    verbal onanism

    Actor, I knew you’d like that one. My (ahem) pleasure.

  203. Capn Fatback said,

    February 19, 2010 at 4:34

    Oh, here’s some choice nuggets from another “editorial,” from Alkon’s buddy Kanazawam entitiled “Why is Health Care a Right?”:

    Life – and everything in it – is a means to the ultimate goal of reproduction. Life is important, and we have to live, only because we can’t reproduce if we are dead.

    In the United States, millions of people – mostly, young, poor men, the same people who don’t have health insurance or choose not to take advantage of the available health care – are left mateless, sexless, and childless, and are destined to die as total reproductive losers

    How come nobody cares that millions of people in the United States fail to achieve the ultimate goal of all biological existence, the meaning of life itself? Why isn’t it the government’s job to make sure that every American has sex regularly and frequently and produces children? Why doesn’t the government import surplus women from Russia and Ukraine and distribute them at taxpayers’ expense to millions of young, poor men who can’t otherwise get laid?

    Now there’s an endorsement!

  204. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 5:16

    Kanazawam sounds like that “Precious Bodily Fluids” guy in “Dr. Alkonlove”

  205. Picky McNits said,

    February 19, 2010 at 5:25

    Farrar Stowe-Sanchez wrote:

    I’m not an Amy minion, by the way, I stumbled on to you via your “reviews”. Thank you also for leading me to her blog. I like it. There is no such thing as bad press seems to be true!

    In fact, I like it so much, I posted there two years ago!

  206. Picky McNits said,

    February 19, 2010 at 5:26

    Farrar Stowe-Sanchez wrote:

    I’m not an Amy minion, by the way, I stumbled on to you via your “reviews”. Thank you also for leading me to her blog. I like it. There is no such thing as bad press seems to be true!

    In fact, I like it so much, I posted there two years ago! It’s great to put your thoughts into a permanent record that anyone can read, but sheesh.

  207. Picky McNits said,

    February 19, 2010 at 5:41

    Bling blang it, yo, you were so far ahead of me on that.

  208. jgmurphy said,

    February 19, 2010 at 6:25

    This “person” is repulsive. And dangerous. And. And. And. (Help…I am hyperventilating…)

    AND……anyone who refers to herself as a “goddess” of any sort with no whit of irony, obviously has issues far too profound for our delving skills.

  209. jgmurphy said,

    February 19, 2010 at 6:46

    Methinks Arnold got hisself yet another ghost name or moniker and posted this, because frankly, who else would bother:

    11 of 14 people found the following review helpful:
    ” Beware of all negative reviews dated after Feb. 17, 2010, February 18, 2010
    By redc1c4 (Lost Angels, CA USA) – See all my reviews
    The blog “Sadly, No!” is conducting a campaign to vilify this book and its author, as shown in the post: [...]. That post includes instructions on how to game the Amazon rating system, such as the use of backhanded compliments and medium ratings, so as to keep these deliberately negative reviews visible. Do not let a petty and childish Internet vendetta keep you from enjoying a book you might otherwise read. Look to the reviews prior to the 17th for a fairer evaluation of the product.

    One need only read the suggested “tags” that came up when I was writing this post to see the vileness of this effort: “useless, books by rubes, i see single-digit sales, rudeness, dont waste your money, manners, annoying, sh t moat, bad advice” to see the nature of their efforts. Are you going to let people this tacky choose your reading material for you? ”

    This is truly frightening. Someone has I S S U E S !!!

    And as per the whole subject of “rudeness,” someone should take Amy/Arnold gently by the elbow, sit him/her down for some tea and crumpets and explain the Psych 101 concept of “projection.” Eureka.

  210. Zarquon said,

    February 19, 2010 at 9:41

    Or posts pictures of itself in tight skirts and a hat

    That dress makes her bum look big. Just sayin’

  211. red e fahmoar said,

    February 19, 2010 at 10:14

    @jgmurphy: Methinks you are absolutely right.

    I went to post a comment under redc1c4′s post and caught Arnold trying to alter the “redc1c4″ alias to “Denise Welvang”.

    For whatever reason Arnold changed it’s mind. Whatever. I got a screen shot of the attempt at any rate.

  212. Robert said,

    February 19, 2010 at 10:50

    Ahhh the irony is compounded by irony.

    First, I can’t help but note that the caricature in question appears to be based along the lines of Queen Elizabeth I. Given that she was one of the greatest leaders England ever had, and one of the strongest women in history…I find it hard to fathom that the maker could consider this in any way insulting.

    Its far more likely that the maker is in fact mocking YOU ALL, by getting to post a very complimentary caricature in a very insulting general tirade.

    I have no serious quarrel with the left as a rule, truth be told, while I am conservative in some respects I have grown to disillusioned with either party to align myself with either one except where a vote coincides with one of my own stances.

    That said, I find it utterly hilarious that so much is said here to malign Amy Alkon, which is so often contradictory.

    She’s insulted as an author…but you go to the trouble to read, or pretend to have read, her books just to fuel your dislike and attempt to hurt its sales. Leaving aside the obviously immoral act of lying, the rest of that is just plain childishly nasty.

    She’s exempted from privacy and thrown to public mockery because she is a “public figure” and a “published author” but at the same time, she’s accused of having delusions of granduer and importance.

    She’s accused of being a transexual as some kind of insult…which aside from being so obviously untrue, I thought was something that left leaning persons tended to be very tolerant of, thus suggesting the purported tolerance is something trotted out only when moral high ground is somehow necessary.

    My time is short, but I cannot help but point out one more thing.

    You’ve all spent minute after precious minute of your ever shortening lives, not to produce some work to outsell hers, not to make yourselves better, not to relax, not to learn, not to earn an honest buck, hell not even to earn a dishonest one, or play with your kids, or teach them something useful, or do anything at all good for anyone, including yourselves…you’ve used collectively I cannot even guess how many hours…days…weeks, heaping hate, vitriol, libel, and in some cases forms of harassment (I know this doesn’t apply to all of you) on a person with whom you just happen to disagree, even perhaps strongly disagree.

    And what has been the accomplishment as an end result of all that?

    She’s gotten free publicity.
    She’s expanded her fanbase as people who never heard of her, become aware of her through your cantankerous little anti alkon campaign, which ends up making people dislike you, and like her more by contrast. (Try understanding, let alone caring, or befriending, or convincing an angry person of anything, never happens, never works, angry people make other people make friends, and end up losing out themselves)

    Her book, which some of you pan so voraciously, will actually get EXTRA attention, and make more sales just because of the tactics you’ve undertaken.

    I’m not to fond of the right, but if all I knew about the left came from what I’ve seen right here, I’d head straight over to the right camp and never look back.

    Pleasant days!

    Robert

  213. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 11:23

    Idiot Robert.

    Try brushing up on your Elizabethan history a bit before you spew off platitudes about great leaders in England.

    The dress in the painting above is clearly from the Edwardian era during the reign of King Edward VII, who governed 1901 – 1910. Not Queen Elizabeth, who lived 1533-1603.

    You fail. Not only at your comment, but also at remedial English history.

  214. bjacques said,

    February 19, 2010 at 12:36

    Well, I’m torn. One the one hand, Alkon’s prose is exhausting to read and the “humor” consists of the occasional “zinger” such as “mad as a bag of ferrets.” It’s a stale brioche with rum raisins to few and far between to reward the effort of choking it down. She’s a “humorist” like P.J. O’Rourke after he stopped writing funny toilet humor for National Lampoon and put on a bowtie for the Cato Foundation.

    On the positive side, that wonderful mane of red hair, and the shoop atop this thread makes her look like Mary Woronov in “Rock & Roll High School.” ROWRRRRR!! OWROOOO!!!!! COMMIT TOGAR! DETENTION! DETENTION!

    I’ll get my coat.

  215. bjacques said,

    February 19, 2010 at 12:36

    “too few”" dammit

  216. bjacques said,

    February 19, 2010 at 12:42

    And Cato Institute. Also.

  217. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 13:50

    First, I can’t help but note that the caricature in question appears to be based along the lines of Queen Elizabeth I.

    Yea, but it wasn’t and your art history knowledge is thus shown to be as inadequate as your penis.

    Buhbye!

  218. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 13:52

    yo,

    Nevermind that Robert is right: the extra attention got TWO. WHOLE. PEOPLE. to buy copies.

    Assuming it wasn’t Arnold herself…

  219. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    February 19, 2010 at 14:13

    ROWRRRRR!! OWROOOO!!!!! COMMIT TOGAR! DETENTION! DETENTION!

    It’s been a looooong time since I’ve seen the movie, but, yeah, she was pretty damn hot in that “schoolmarmish” sense.

  220. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 14:49

    Did anyone besides me get the half-scrinchy face while reading Robert’s condescending little scolding? Aside from his embarrassing failed analogy regarding QEI, which eliminated one of the “ironies” in his “inrony compounded by irony”, he then gives us a lukewarm disclaimer about his political views, which has not been the subject of either the post or this comment section. Notice that Alkon also immediately politicized the criticism of her book/blog – we can’t be criticizing her in any honest way, because we’re LEFTISTS or LIBRULS or commies or pinkos. No, it’s all political and has nothing to do with our opinion that she’s NOT FUNNY. That she’s a LOUSY WRITER. That her self-obsession is BORING.

    That NOBODY CARES!

    Do you know why? Because it’s all political to them, and they have lived this way for years. Because they can’t let themselves like anyone’s work who is leftist, therefore, we can’t like anyone’s work who is right-wing.

    Now, it’s true that there is a dearth of real talent in the right wing these days, but there was a time when there were some good writers, good thinkers, and many a decent human being. Now? Not so much.

    I love this part of Robert’s screed:

    Leaving aside the obviously immoral act of lying, the rest of that is just plain childishly nasty.

    I love that it’s an “immoral act of lying” when everyone here who expressed an opinion of Alkon’s writing has obviously read her blog, read parts or all of her nasty 8th grade girl-hate book (and I know my 8th grade girls, let me tell ya), and has enough information to make a judgment about her skills as a writer.

    And, incidentally, Robert, has the pathological lying of one Sarah Palin bothered you at all? Did the criminal lying of Bush & Cheney, Rove, et al bother you a little? You voted for those clowns and you are in here moralizing about our opinions about a nobody-mediocre, Coulter-wannabe like Alkon?

    I will skip the entire silly paragraph you wrote scolding us for wasting time not doing more important things, because it’s the only part of your screed that is ironic – to praise a woman who makes a living ridiculing, stereotyping, and judging people she has never met nor will ever know and then scolding us for making fun of her is just too rich!

    As far as the transsexual joke, I couldn’t care less and I don’t know its origin. Perhaps it’s the idea that Alkon wants to be Ann Coulter’s little brother. I dunno. Both women have a lot of testosterone.

    You are right about this:

    Her book, which some of you pan so voraciously, will actually get EXTRA attention, and make more sales just because of the tactics you’ve undertaken.

    However, the book will speak for itself. Intelligent, thoughtful, busy people will not be attracted to it anyway. I suspect it will be Alkon’s last chance, since the publishing business does not reward failures.

    This, however, I smell as odiously insincere:

    I’m not to fond of the right, but if all I knew about the left came from what I’ve seen right here, I’d head straight over to the right camp and never look back.

    This is creepy, avuncular, pederast territory. Spare me the faux indignation.

    Have a really pleasant weekend, Robert!

  221. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 15:14

    As far as the transsexual joke, I couldn’t care less and I don’t know its origin.

    Not transsexual. Transvestite. From Transylvania.

    Which is an insult to Dr Frankenfurter because he can pick a dress.

    What we made fun of was Arnold’s sense of “fashion.” He dresses like a drag queen on the Strip.

    When I was a lad, I was acquainted with a man who owned a cross-dressing shop here in NYC. Not particularly discrete, at that (he was dating my swimming coach, and yes, there were attempts to proselytize).

    His line of clothes made Arnold’s look, well, like a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman.

    Arnold’s pathologic need to have attention paid to her, but only on her terms, is the weakness we’ve exploited time and time again. If he ever decided to dial it down a notch, we’d probably give her a miss. He’s hardly worth the effort as it is, except for the uproar and pantytwisting it causes amongst his male audience.

    Now, THAT’S fun!

  222. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 15:31

    The dress in the painting above is clearly from the Edwardian era during the reign of King Edward VII, who governed 1901 – 1910. Not Queen Elizabeth, who lived 1533-1603.

    Half credit.

    The painting is from the Tudor era but is Italian. It’s entitled “Lady With A Puppy” and was completed in 1532 or perhaps as late as 1536. QEI took the throne in 1558, ergo this was painted while Henry VIII was ruler. The only known Italian painter to paint QEI was Zuccaro.

    It saddens me the lack of knowledge of fine art by Arnold’s patrons. But it’s OK, Robert: I blame the Reagan department of education for forcing funding cuts to arts education.

  223. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 15:34

    She’s exempted from privacy and thrown to public mockery because she is a “public figure” and a “published author” but at the same time, she’s accused of having delusions of granduer and importance.

    I don’t see a contradiction in terms. She’s tried. She’s failed. She’s been weighed, she’s been measured, she’s been found wanting.

    Are you suggesting the only people who should try for fame and fortune are the people who are guaranteed it?

    You know, like a spoiled white child from the suburbs of, say, Detroit who had mummy and pater send him to some Christian-domnated private school where she was mocked for being a Jew?

    And even then, even with all those advantages, fails????

  224. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 15:54

    Another funny little observation about the gymnastics that the Alkoholics are doing over at the Amazon book review brew-ha-ha:

    Their most common Talking Point is “why don’t you cowards post under your real name? Your anonymity allows you to trash this fine, fine writer!”

    Note this kind of meaningless drivel only comes from positive reviewers. After seeing how the wingnuts, nutjobs, and ‘pigs of the world like Stalkin’ Malkin and Tranny Alkon go stalking and trying to personally destroy any negative commenters, methinks a bit of anonymity with such vulgar, boorish, rude, bullies is absolutely required.

  225. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 19, 2010 at 16:08

    Ooo, insulting women by saying they have testosterone (what, being male is an insult now, just like being gay apparently is?) and mocking the size of someone’s penis instead of making a sensible counterargument. Yep, sounds mature to me! Come on, let’s just get to “You’re a big poopy-pants” and let ya;ll take a rest, I’m sure your little brains are tired.

    I’m amazed to know I’m the only person posting in the entire internet using the momof4 moniker. It’s so awesome that it’s so rare that all posts are mine! I love being an original. (sarcasm off)

    Thank you all, though, as like many blogs with paid advertising, Amy gets paid by the # of people visiting, so go visit! By all means!

    Actor(I won’t out your name, since you seem too scared to), I’m still waiting to hear what you’ve acted in! Loretta, any books not panned by critics across the board? Or are you still trying to cash in on the “make murderers celebrities” genre?

  226. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 16:12

    Poor Farrar.

    Keep pedalling, little girl! One day you might make the Kindergarten X Games on your Big Wheel, dearie.

  227. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 16:34

    It’s pretty funny to see farrar still posting here after her lies (by yo, above) have been outed.

    As every ‘pig knows, if you lie – as ALL ‘pigs do with kleptomaniac-like intensity and repetition – and get caught, just scream louder.

  228. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 16:52

    Clearly, she’s a) not reading the posts, preferring a smear-and-run campaign and b) she’s emulating the Queen of Self-immolation, Arnold Alkon.

  229. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 16:53

    Oh, that reminds me:

    HEY ARNOLD!

    I slept really well last night.

    I know you did not.

    Wanna know how I know this?

  230. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:07

    Question for Farrar and Robert, as well as the other minions:

    Does Arnold share her profits with you, or are you doing her bidding for free?

    If you are, you’re morons and she’s exploiting you.

  231. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:14

    Looks like they “cleaned up” the negative reviews over at Amazon.

    Controversy is never good for sales…(rolls eyes)

  232. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:18

    Latest insane blather from Mr. Alkon over at Amazon, from the last negative review they left – interestingly, the only one that is possibly over the line wherein the tranny outs bookworm22:

    “I tracked him down and exposed him, and I’m proud I did. I’m find with people who disagree with me — put up a website criticizing me — I have no problem with that.”

    Seems like she has a BIG problem with that “website criticizing me [him]“, name of Sadly, No!

    Direct lies and hypocrisy from ‘pigs as self-unaware as Mr. Alkon are never a surprise.

  233. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:22

    She’s not using “tiny thugs” anymore to describe sadlynaughts. He’s using “anonymous thugs”.

    My observation about her obsession with her (perceived) enemies being tiny must’ve hit a nerve.

    Nothing that a bigger dose of Ritalin won’t help, Arnold.

  234. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:32

    Repig,

    My last comment directly to Arnold last night was taking the “tiny thugs” theme and then pointing out your observation about her eating a tiny person on the cover of her book…

    …then dropping the “Eat me” bomb on his ass! It seems that comment was taken down, however.

    I posted a new review :-)

  235. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:36

    By the way, Arnold?

    I want to thank your minions for all the hits at my various websites, including (especially) the ones where I share in the profits, like Qoop and RedGage. Indeed, my profile at Amazon has never seen so many hits and I especially thank those of you who went to all my comments. Amazon has bumped me way up the rankings of commenters now. I feel so empowered!

    And of course, my blog, the Non-Rapturist’s Guide To the Galaxy, Simply Left Behind.

    IPs have been grepped. ;-)

  236. tigrismus said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:49

    “I tracked him down and exposed him, and I’m proud I did. I’m find with people who disagree with me — put up a website criticizing me — I have no problem with that.”

    That makes you a thug, and a very small person. What’s more, you know this to be true.

  237. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 17:57

    No no, tig, we’re tiny anonymous thugs because we hampered her ability to earn a living, not because we criticized her royal worshipfulness.

    As if…

  238. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 18:29

    I tracked him down and exposed him, and I’m proud I did. I’m find with people who disagree with me — put up a website criticizing me — I have no problem with that.

    Hang on…so she’s OK with us criticizing her anonymously or from afar, but get in her face….???

    Isn’t that the premise of her goddamn fucking horrible book????

  239. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 18:29

    I had to post a new review. I don’t know how Alkon got all those reviews removed, especially ones that were from legitimate reviewers, since I could not get 90% of the fake personally attacking reviews removed from my book, but oh well!

    I will personally complain to Amazon (of which I am a huge customer and contributing author if they remove another one of my legitimate reviews.

    Here it is in case it goes poof:

    While I agree with Ms. Alkon’s observations about pervasive rudeness in our culture, her solutions are cynical, mean-spirited, and even more rude than the behavior she deigns to punish. I don’t know whether the author is capable of compassion, empathy or shame, but judging by this book, her columns and blog, she is either spoofing all of us or a cold, unhappy woman.

    Either way, this book fails in that it is not funny. I don’t find judgmental, angry belittling of mass-groups of people or ridiculing people’s dress, cell phone use, technology dependance, incompetence, or basic stupidity to be funny when Alkon deals with it. Unlike Kurt Vonnegut, Dave Barry, Erma Bombeck, and the inane but sweet Andy Rooney, Ms. Alkon’s observations are harsh, snide and unhelpful.

    The research documented in the book is pseudo-science at best, as well as unoriginal and trite, and proves nothing except that we are hard wired as a species to be aggressive, selfish and obtuse. We are also hard wired to be attention-deficit, hunters and killers. This proves what, exactly?

    My main issue with the author is that her book and other work fail to make me laugh, and that’s saying a lot, since I am very easily amused.

  240. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 18:37

    Hopefully, it will be voted helpful enough to show up on the front page.

  241. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 18:47

    I’m all for leaving Arnold in his plastic bubble. There’s six billion people on this planet and he’s welcome to the few dozen he’s managed to accumulate across the course of his angry, bitter, sexless life.

  242. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 19:25

    Oh, she’ll continue to attract fellow victims and drama hos. Her entire schtick is about being a dramatic victim. She chases and attracts ill treatment, abuse, damage, and negativity. She’s a magnet for bad karma, and she articulates this breast-beating rage very well.

    It’s fine if you like that kind of thing, but it’s just Not Funny.

  243. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 19:42

    top of the mid-afternoon to folks, just tuning in now…i so admire your vigilance! i’ve been reflecting on how much alkonetic engagement is folly, or more in the category of the occasional cigarette/4th-consecutive-gin.

    wow, as i write this, fresh off the presses from a…d/n:

    My issue is not with people “mocking” me, or criticizing me – this was part of a mob attack on my site to intimidate me and quash my free speech.

    well, that about settles that question

  244. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 19:46

    someone give me a cigarette – g&t anyone? popcorn?

  245. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 19:53

    I will personally complain to Amazon (of which I am a huge customer and contributing author if they remove another one of my legitimate reviews.

    i’m with you loretta, and glad to hear you have pull since i don’t — i’m wondering how much to crusade for bookworm222 on principle alone, who may not even be TF and isn’t pursuing this. letting the “out” stand is really sticking in my craw.

  246. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 20:28

    I was wasting time on the computer, waiting for a couple of stocks I’m watching to move (I daytrade among other things, nothing big, but it brings in a few ducats every now and then)

    So, seeing as how idle hands are the devil’s workshop, I’m idly looking at the 5-star reviews on Mr. Alkon’s magnum opus. The reason is to check out how many of the 5-star reviewers have reviewed nothing else besides their idols’ latest defecation. Naturally most of them fit that description.

    A few do review other things, mostly worthless trash fiction. But one guy manages to trash an anti-chimp book throwing in a nice “Bush Derangement Syndrome” in it. The same guy also reviews …. wait for it …. a vibrator designed to be shoved up your asshole.

    That reviewer is Trent Rollow (“real name” certified so I’m not revealing anything). Check it out if you want to beat the dead horse just a bit more, and want a hearty laugh.

  247. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 20:36

    And to think Alkon’s minions mocked me for reviewing pink silk pajamas with jade buttons along with eyelash serum, as though I was some kind of hussy. I really enjoyed being portrayed as a hussy, I must admit. ha!

    Going to see the vibrator guy…..

  248. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 20:48

    I expanded on my review after having an epiphany at lunch.

  249. Bryan said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:06

    “So, folks, if you’ve read the book, not liked it, and want to stand up for freedom of speech,”

    Um, freedom of speech derives from the First Amendment, which states “Congress shall make no law … abridging the freedom of speech.”

    Last I checked, Freedom of Speech acted only to block the government from making laws preventing speech. When an individual bars or prevents speech, or some other way limits it, its not a first amendment issue at all.

    So, nice try, but, sadly, no.

  250. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:24

    jesus christ this is worse than crack, but i’m still getting alerts on new amazon comments. i haven’t been over to the blog, but apparently a bystander has been outed:

    The irony of your statement “intimidate me and quash my free speech” is not only terribly ironic, but absolutely hypocritical.

    You rabidly outed a person on your blog last evening under the name of “shass” and posted the city shass lives in, unprovoked. Tracked down so cleverly according to your powerful IP Address Finder. You accused the poster of not reading your book. Shass’s review dated from early February, before any of this business started. That was but one shining example of your knee-jerk vindictiveness. You neither apologized nor showed any remorse for your unjustified smack-down to a poster who I’m sure will have some choice words for you that he/she will be sharing with friends and colleagues alike. “Quash free speech” indeed. Internet bully indeed.

    i’d like to join the rant but i’m trapped in a sudoku wit puzzle: how to ironically highlight such thick irony? actor, are you on it?

  251. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:25

    Bryan,

    We know that. Amy is pretending to be a government goddess. Please do try to keep up.

  252. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:26

    actor, are you on it?

    hadn’t seen it. Yet.

  253. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:32

    i’ll chime in too once i think of something — maybe IRL — but i just can’t keep up with you paragons of prankstery-ness. i want to build on the theme of how i’d love it if called me tranny or chris rock called me his n—ah. but even that bludgeony example might be lost on this crowd.

  254. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:32

    oops i meant if [insert here] called me “tranny”

  255. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:38

    I found it and got in on it.

    Arnold apparently has much time on his hands this week.

  256. KarenW said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:40

    I am not ashamed to say that I’m a regular reader of Amy’s blog. I’m not a worshipful follower, nor do I agree with everything she says – I simply find it entertaining and thought-provoking. I came here because I was genuinely curious about what you have against Amy. I thought I would find some debate about how her views are wrong and why they are wrong. Needless to say – what a huge disappointment. Just an endless scroll of “you’re ugly and your momma dresses you funny” style insults. Not one thought with any substance to it out of hundreds of comments. Now I’ll watch while you all decide I must have a fat ass or something instead of actually addressing anything I’ve had to say.

  257. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:40

    Is Amy paying you all? She must be. Keep up the good work, her sales are going up! Good job!

  258. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:41

    Arnold, please…you’re embarassing yourself! You might want to ponder that McGraw Hill probably lurks these threads keeping tabs on how their authors are behaving.

    my favorite of all, if only it were true. my mom worked for McGraw Hill. ooops! i’ve outed myself!! [runs to hide under rock]

  259. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:43

    KarenW

    aw Karen, only W?

  260. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:46

    Karen sweetums, as much as you want to have this be about you, it isn’t. It’s about that raging narcissist and rude stalker, Manny Alkon.

  261. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:48

    farrar, aka momof4, aka momof3, aka Proven Liar: you ‘pigs are always soft on that causation and logic stuff, aren’t you?

  262. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:53

    I don’t know who Red E Fahmoar is, but I want to buy him a drink.

  263. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:55

    I thought I would find some debate about how her views are wrong and why they are wrong.

    I’ll tell you why they are wrong:

    She hurts people to prove her point.

    I can do that. In fact, I’m doing that. I’m hurting Arnold to show her that by hurting people, you don’t prove a goddamn thing.

    Got a problem with that?

  264. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:56

    Now I’ll watch while you all decide I must have a fat ass

    I’m betting you do, actually. Or at least you’re worried that you do.

  265. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 21:58

    She hurts people to prove her point feel better about her own wretched life.

    Sorry for fixilating you, Actor, but it was needed since we have some really dense ‘pig visitors here.

  266. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:00

    Well, there is that, too. I said as much in my new review of her book, which I actually started to read…

    ….you know, for shits and giggles. Once, I even read a galley copy of Jonah’s book, “Liberal Fascists and the Fascists Who Call Them That” or whatever the title was…

  267. tigrismus said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:24

    Yeah, Karen, maybe we’re rude. When we write a book about how rude other people are and how we are the gods and goddesses of giving advice to combat the rudeness of a world full of tiny thugs we’ll deserve reviews calling us out on it.

  268. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:25

    THEY DELETED AMY’S COMMENTS! LOL! The one’s where she outted people and used my personal information to threaten to out me!

    I love it!

  269. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:30

    Oh, the thread those comments were deleted in:

    Bookworm

  270. yo said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:34

    I am Arnold.

    Hear me rawr.

  271. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:40

    When we write a book about how rude other people are and how we are the gods and goddesses of giving advice to combat the rudeness of a world full of tiny thugs we’ll deserve reviews calling us out on it.

    For me, that’s the funniest bit about all this: her minions are defending the same behavior they’re accusing us of.

  272. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 22:53

    If I’m reading Arnold’s comments correctly, we’ve broken her.

  273. red e fahmoar said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:00

    Dunno about that just yet. Arnold has a habit of copying and pasting bits and pieces from various posts over the years as a method of “argument”. There’s never anything original. Just copy/paste, copy/paste, copy/tweak/paste ad nauseum.

  274. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:04

    Manny Alkon likes to get even with people who dare to wrong Her Highness, instead of letting normal legal/etc channels take care of it. The difference between her, Micheal Douglas in “Falling Down”, and Joe Stack is only a matter of degree, not of attitude.

    As with all narcissists, she suffers from terminal Projection.

  275. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:07

    If I’m reading Arnold’s comments correctly, we’ve broken her.

    I don’t know about that, but her comments on the Amazon board indicate that her intelligence is nowhere near what she thinks it is. In a nutshell, she sounds kinda slow on the uptake – mildly retarded, or Triggy, if you will.

    Probably makes her hate the quick wits over here even more.

  276. red e fahmoar said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:12

    In a nutshell, she sounds kinda slow on the uptake – mildly retarded, or Triggy, if you will.

    Indeed. Bright, she isn’t. Which is why, as I wrote, she constantly copies and pastes her “arguments”. She’s never possessed the swiftness of wit to craft new ones. And never will.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if she has some MS doc cheat sheet full of (re)posting points that she refers to whenever she gets engaged in discussion.

  277. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:20

    Yea, but I think I had her backpedalling when she started posting “Why are you doing this to meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?”

  278. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:29

    mildly retarded, or Triggy, if you will

    beaten to the draw again. sudoku answer:
    “three stabs in, Marion realized Bates was mentally retarded”

    never before has irony this thick been completely involuntary. oh, and did I mention the mysterious #000000 phone calls I’ve been getting? arnie, next time I’ll pick up.

  279. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:38

    broken her

    oh HELL yes. she’s even rewriting all of her other comments which turns the whole thread into gibberish — now I understand why she flipped out at my “edits” which only corrected the spelling of her name, p-r-o-j-e-c-t-i-o-n but this whole exercise has just negated her entire manifesto. or rather, neutered it. tintin’s omniscient prediction of remainderment is looking good – if only we, like arnie, had been chronicling all this in PDF.

  280. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:41

    and may I add, nice work. S, F one, assholes zero.

  281. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:41

    and may I add, nice work. S, N one, assholes zero.

  282. SED the Infamous said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:44

    and may I also say, I’m posting/editing these comments with a mobile device.

  283. red e fahmoar said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:47

    For anybody not wanting to scroll through all of Arnold’s boring comments, this is Arnold synopsized for your pleasure on Amazon:

    Tiny thugs!
    Thug mob!
    You’re hurting my book sales!
    Amazon, delete these negative reviews!
    Stop quashing my free speech!
    That’s libel!
    I can take criticism! (throws out a hapless regular blog poster as a human shield)
    You’re libeling one of my blog posters! (even though he’s not a real person)
    Amazon, delete these comments!
    I believe in free speech!

  284. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:50

    Manny Alkon is back to excessive use of “tiny” and related synonyms to describe people she hates over at the Amazon hilarity-fest.

    There might be a linear relationship between her self-medicating level and dosage time lag, with respect to her insecurity, at any given moment. It would be foolish to not speculate….

  285. actor212 said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:52

    Amazon, delete these negative reviews!
    Stop quashing my free speech!

    This was the priceless bit for me.

  286. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:53

    For anybody not wanting to scroll through all of Arnold’s boring comments, this is Arnold synopsized for your pleasure on Amazon:

    Don’t forget

    “I don’t mind criticism from a valid website”
    vs.
    “You tiny thugs at Sadly, No! are really irritating me! I’m a Royal Highness!”

  287. loretta said,

    February 19, 2010 at 23:54

    Well, the whole incident piqued my curiosity about Alkon and several of her supporters on her blog and at Amazon; so, I decided to read many of her posts and columns and track down some of her less anonymous lickspittles. It has been an interesting journey and I think I can generalize the typical Alkon fan and play armchair psychologist (my favorite role-playing game, while wearing my pink silk pajamas with the broken jade buttons and sporting my very long eyelashes).

    The typical Alkon fan has a strong Judeo-Christian religious belief system, some more adamant and overt than others (see the vibrator guy, for example – he is very religious, believes he has experienced a ghost tapping on his shoulder, is self-righteous, hates his ex-wife, does not understand the concept behind the book “Why Men Marry Bitches” and is also an avid poker player, which may indicate he has a gambling problem. We have the trifecta here!) Others who comment on Alkon’s blog are similar to her in that they have great, big chips on their shoulders and have an unrealistic sense of entitlement. (See also Tea-Baggers.)

    Alkon is the manifestation of an unfortunate stereotype herself: the Jewish American Princess, aquisitive, materialistic, spiteful, bitchy, judgmental, critical, emasculating and anti-maternal who eschews common decency because she has a persecution complex.

    In sum: wholly unattractive.

  288. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:01

    Several of the 5-star reviews of Mr. Alkon’s book include the phrase “I don’t read a lot of books.”

    The unintentional irony is dripping so heavily over there that I fear a rip in the time-space continuum.

  289. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:03

    Loretta,

    Ever see the movie “Heathers”? (“Mean Girls” is similar)

    Arnold is one of the Heathers. You simply MUST worship Arnold.

    Me? I’m just Christian Slater….

    J/K Arnold! I don’t carry a gun to school!

  290. SED the Infamous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:04

    Yes repig, see “vortex” above. No full quote cuz I’m not on qwerty

  291. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:04

    re: the vibrator guy. It’s always fun to see religious types extolling the virtues of stuffing objects up their ass. I’m waiting for his review of using two wetsuits at once.

  292. loretta said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:05

    To be fair, 18 of the 33 5-star reviewers actually bought the book. That’s a little over half. I notice she does not criticize those who gave the book a rave review who have not bought it nor read it.

  293. loretta said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:12

    In one of the comments at Amazon, someone remarked that Alkon was a newbie to the Internets and did not appreciate the traditions.

    She uses AOL.

    Need I say more?

  294. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:13

    Checking out the 5-star reviewers is turning out to be a treasure trove of snarkalicious goodness!

    One of them (T. Gregory; again “real name” so I’m not outing anyone) calls herself a “book & music lover”. With a phrase like that, I thought, hmmmm, this one might be different. So I checked out her other reviews … 3 trash fiction books, a desk accessory, and a pair of generic earbuds.

    There really is nothing funnier on the intertoooooobz today.

  295. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:19

    More commenter funnies:

    Read the log-rolling comments by Margaret Carlson (real name, yadda yadda yadda). Each log-roll sounds exactly the same, give or take a few words.

  296. loretta said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:29

    B. A. Herzhaft – real name – has a review of “The Sartorialist” where she complains that the book contains 70% images of men instead of equally including women in the fashion chronology.

    Doesn’t Ms. Herzhaft know that “sartorial” is generally attributed to men’s tailoring?

  297. red e fahmoar said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:36

    See my reply to buttplug guy.

    This is Arnold’s audience. I’m so jealous.

  298. KarenW said,

    February 20, 2010 at 0:58

    “she sounds kinda slow on the uptake – mildly retarded, or Triggy, if you will” Are you fucking serious? “Triggy,” as in Trig Palin, is your phrase for calling someone retarded? You all are disgusting. How dare any of you say that Amy is mean-spirited. She would NEVER stoop so low as to use an innocent child as a means of insulting someone.

    Oh and by the way: “The typical Alkon fan has a strong Judeo-Christian religious belief system.” Wrong! Amy is an atheist as are most of her readers (I am an exception). Yet another example of the ignorance so prevelent on this blog.

  299. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:13

    Are you fucking serious? “Triggy,” as in Trig Palin, is your phrase for calling someone retarded? You all are disgusting.

    Whoa, backup there pardner! I made absolutely no connection to Governor Palin’s daughter! The word “triggy” is one that I and my friends used to use to ridicule stupid people who thought they were smart. But I see you made some kind of connection. Why do you hate retards?

    Wrong! Amy is an atheist as are most of her readers

    Did you get this info by stalking every one of them or by getting their IP addresses like Mr. Alkon takes a fancy to doing?

    Yet another example of the ignorance so prevelent on this blog.

    I admit there is a lot of ignorance here – as long as you’re talking about ignorance in understanding how many stupid people there are who worship a rancid trash writer like Alkon.

    Seriously, how often do you Alkonlytes burn the water when you’re boiling it for tea?

  300. red e fahmoar said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:18

    Ha. deleted by Amazon.

  301. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:22

    Ha. deleted by Amazon.

    I caught it before they deleted it. Priceless.

    It appears as if the Alkonholics personify the phrase “born being struck out, thinking they hit a triple”

  302. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:31

    She would NEVER stoop so low as to use an innocent child as a means of insulting someone.

    No. Of course she wouldn’t!

    “Little tragedy on legs” is one of my favorite smears…

  303. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:38

    From Arnold:

    I have a penis on my website.

  304. Robert said,

    February 20, 2010 at 1:55

    Actually I did not vote for Bush in either the first election, or the second. As a professional soldier, I hold to the apolitical traditions of military service, and do not involve myself in political affairs in any official capacity. The exception that I make is for idle political debate, which seldom fails to at least entertain new ideas. Those are vital the the progression of society, every positive form and function for government and society today after all, began as a new idea, vetted, scrutinized, tested, and gradually successfully applied. This also applies unfortunately, to the bad ideas and failed ones, some of which we still cope with today. But that is another subject. I will say this when it comes to politicians in general though, trust them only as far as you can boot them out of office, no matter which side of the fence you’re on. Assume every politician is a liar until proven otherwise. Its been a long time since Washington’s “I cannot tell a lie.” (Yes that is just a myth, but the honorable politician is as rare as feathers on a fish in the 21st century)

    ————————-

    Thank you actor212 for the correction regarding the portrait’s clothing, I had the right period, if not quite the right region. While I am fond of fine art, it is not a profession, nor even a hobby I can afford to indulge in often. Those with many interests can seldom indulge them all, that after all, is what retirement is for, and I’ve a good number of years left before that.

    (Seriously, a penis comment though? Am I dealing with a child star here? What next are you going to ask if I’m a cunning linguist?)
    ————————-

    If my political disclaim appears to be luke warm, well there you are correct. I lean to the right more often than to the left, but that has more to do with constitutional concerns than any one stance by either party on most current issues. Its not that you nor your particular little tribe here are unable to criticize in an honest way BECAUSE you are liberals. There are a fair number of liberal types on there that argue all the time. What politicized everything, to borrow your phrase, is that everyone ON THIS SITE, IS a liberal of a heavily progressive bent. Now I hold nothing against people for holding to their views, point in fact I have far less trust in people who hold no views, than those who are at least passionate about what they do believe.

    But the cold hard fact is that all the vitriol tossed her way in its worst forms, has come from the left. The right has certainly criticized her, almost invariably over issues religious or cultural, from evolution to gay marriage, the debates have gotten thoroughly heated. However none of them, however much you might like to think otherwise, have been accusatory about sexuality, used transexualism as a form of insult, deliberately attempted to sabotage book sales, nor attempted to shut down her website with spam or DOS.

    As a side note, I’d love to have a weekend, appreciate the sentiment, but it’ll be awhile before I have those again. Living overseas can be a real bitch.

    ——————————

    I can’t address issues of fashion. I wouldn’t know where to begin, I wear the same work clothes 7 days a week. And when it comes to casual clothing…I NEVER go clothes shopping without a woman, now they know how to make a man look good. I can’t help but wonder though, what drag queens are you looking at that often that you can identify a particular clothing style??? Is it like the “Goth” subculture where there is a pattern of clothing or particular set of stores or labels that help identify a group?

  305. red e fahmoar said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:04

    ­Crotch fruit is one of my personal favorites.

    It illustrates how how deeply she cares for children.

  306. red e fahmoar said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:08

    Robert said, February 20, 2010 at 1:55

    But the cold hard fact is that all the vitriol tossed her way in its worst forms, has come from the left.

    Robert, Robert, Robert, where to start…

    I adhere neither to the right or the left.

    I just don’t like assholes.

  307. Robert said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:16

    As a general rule red e fahmoar, neither do I. But there are lines.

    I get the feeling you’re not the sort to post fake book reviews to hurt sales. But some people are, and thus far against this author, all of them have come from one camp.

    Perhaps you’re not the sort to use spam to try to shut down a conversation over the internet because you didn’t like the content. But again with this author, all those who are, have come from one camp.

    Perhaps you aren’t the kind of person that would insult the use of a life improving medication. But those who have, with this author, have all come from one camp.

    Perhaps you aren’t the sort of person that would attempt to belittle someone by insulting them with an incorrect name, or use transgenderism as a form of insult. But those who have, with this author…have all come from one camp.

    See the pattern here? Lots of right wing people have disagreed thoroughly with the “asshole” in question, indeed I can readily understand why her work might not be to someone else’s tastes. That is well and good. To each their own. Everyone has their favorite & least favorite authors, public figures, whathaveyou.

    But the worst behavior has come from one direction, and it is only further highlighted, because ideally speaking, that should be the side that has the high ground morally, ethically, and in matters of personal conduct.

  308. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:17

    Seriously, a penis comment though?

    When you grow a serious penis, then I’ll take you seriously.

  309. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:18

    Perhaps you aren’t the kind of person that would insult the use of a life improving medication.

    Perhaps if that author hadn’t a) done the same thing to people who couldn’t fight back and b) hadn’t made that whole thing up about having it prescibed and just fessed to its recreational use, we might not have bothered.

  310. Robert said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:33

    “When you grow a serious penis, then I’ll take you seriously.”

    And that is your idea of debate…sounding like you get your political views from the biggest male porn stars?

    Out of curiosity, how the hell does someone use ritalin “recreationally”? I took the stuff for almost 20 years (yes it was authorized) and I’d never thought of anything fun to take.

    And just as a secondary point, I doubt there is any insult you wouldn’t have bothered with.

  311. Robert said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:34

    (in answer to earlier)

    Although I should also say that, as someone whose entire job relates to relating to the public, its not likely a pathological need for public notice, but rather a practical one. After all, the more people aware of her, the more will read her. Do we say Al Gore has a pathological need for attention when he promotes his own activities? Of course not, getting the public eye, for better or worse, is the only way to draw public money for services such as advice, writing, charity, or whatever activity one does that relates to the public as a good or service.

    Dialing it down a notch…would be quite counterproductive, to say nothing of economic suicide.

    ———————————–

    As to the question if she shares her profits. No. Is it “her bidding” also no.

    An I exploited? Eh, I am using some of my time for this, so perhaps a little bit.
    But I don’t really mind, sometimes after all, I learn something new. After all, I learned the difference between Italian clothing vs English clothing in the 1500s, and I rather like obscure knowledge. So, I call it a fair trade.

  312. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:38

    And that is your idea of debate

    Dude, it’s a comedy site…if you’re here to have an argument, that’s down the hall.

  313. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:38

    Ah, the old “most insults come from the left” lie.

    I must’ve missed all those liberals calling ‘pigs traitors, muslims, Hitler, terrorists, etc, like millions and millions and millions and millions of ‘pigs did to Obama.

  314. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:38

    I doubt there is any insult you wouldn’t have bothered with.

    It’s pretty late in the day for you to start telling the truth.

  315. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:41

    Robert sounds like one of those “I’m not left OR right” guys who somehow, probably just by accident, never voted for anybody to the left of Attila – and who consider Bush a “wild lib” (now, anyway).

  316. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 2:55

    Robert seems like a decent guy.

    Except for the fact he’s defending a bully who beats up on poor single mothers, someone who’s perfectly capable of defending herself, if her bullying is any indication, yet who has somehow been unable to stand up to even the minor assault we’ve put on her on an internet site.

    One wonders how she’d handle actually having to face us. I hope she comes to NYC on a book tour. I’d make a point of showing up to embarrass her personally

  317. SED the Infamous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 3:18

    One wonders how she’d handle actually having to face us. I hope she comes to NYC on a book tour. I’d make a point of showing up to embarrass her personally

    please grep my IP when you do, so you can drop me a line to come cheer you on.

  318. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 3:22

    One wonders how she’d handle actually having to face us. I hope she comes to NYC on a book tour. I’d make a point of showing up to embarrass her personally

    I’ll watch for it as well. I think we would have a quorum at any book signing of hers.

  319. SED the Infamous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 3:23

    Out of curiosity, how the hell does someone use ritalin “recreationally”?

    having never tried ritalin, i can’t speak to this personally but i heard on NPR the other day — science friday i think — about growing recreational use on college campuses of ritalin and other prescription drugs for ADHD. i’d go grab a link or something, but i’m getting off topic again…

  320. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 3:38

    I used Ritalin in college, altho we called it MPH back then.

    It wasn’t bad. Mild kick, but easier to get a hold of than coke.

  321. tigrismus said,

    February 20, 2010 at 4:34

    Yet another example of the ignorance so prevelent on this blog.

    It’s spelled “prevalent.”

  322. crella said,

    February 20, 2010 at 5:09

    “One wonders how she’d handle actually having to face us. I hope she comes to NYC on a book tour. I’d make a point of showing up to embarrass her personally”

    Go for it! That I’d love to see, you people getting your arses handed to you.

  323. crella said,

    February 20, 2010 at 5:14

    The definition of triggy is–

    1. exceptionally cool and awesome
    2. from the word ‘trigana’, meaning holy
    3. used predominantly in the phrase ‘that ciggy is triggy’

    What you wrote–

    ‘she sounds kinda slow on the uptake – mildly retarded, or Triggy, if you will’

    does not fit the definition, and the capital T makes it all the more obvious.

  324. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 5:50

    The definition of triggy is–

    Maybe in ‘pig world it is, but as we all know from the last 8 years of FAIL, you ‘pigs are the ne plus ultra, the epitome, the absolute ultimate in PURE FAIL.

  325. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 12:57

    That I’d love to see, you people getting your arses handed to you.

    Given how I have Arnold cowering in a corner in her own room from 3600 miles away…I wonder how much piss there’d be on the floor when I towered over her, blocking the sun?

    Bullies annoy me and I love annoying them

  326. crella said,

    February 20, 2010 at 13:48

    “Maybe in ‘pig world it is, but as we all know from the last 8 years of FAIL, you ‘pigs are the ne plus ultra, the epitome, the absolute ultimate in PURE FAIL.’

    You mind addressing what I wrote, and in English, please? I got that out of a dictionary , you tool.

    What does any of that have to do with you opting to use the name of a Down’s Syndrome baby to equal the word ‘retarded’?

  327. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 14:33

    I got that out of a dictionary , you tool.

    We make her trot out her dictionary, but we’re the tools…*snark*

  328. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 14:34

    I dunno there, Crella…you sound kinda Triggy to me.

  329. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 20, 2010 at 15:53

    Making fun of a trisomy-23 INFANT? Wow. You really are pooh-flinging monkeys, reacting to something that scares you in the only way you know how (as someone else has said). And now that you’re called on it, you’re desperately trying to backpedal, like a true coward that can’t stand behind what they say, even when it’s cowardly anonymous.

    And nice try saying you’re calling Amy a tranny because she dresses like a transvestite. I know you don’t want to seem like you’re mocking transgendered people, but you’ve made what you really meant very clear by all your posts calling her a man (like that’s an insult??) and asking about her penis and her adams apple and saying she hasn’t managed to have her surgery yet. Which you’d know, had you read her book, because the sadlyno coward posts are featured in it.

    Are you proud of yourselves? You pick on the most helpless members of society in your insults, post anonymously, and then try to backpedal. Cowards, one and all. My 5 year old is more mature.

  330. farrar stowe-sanchez said,

    February 20, 2010 at 15:55

    Actor, you’d shit your pants if you were ever confronted by Amy, or anyone else, if you ever left your basement. You’re a sad, trying-to-be-brave-when-”anonymous”-and-safe little man.

  331. loretta said,

    February 20, 2010 at 17:12

    Well, Farrar, you are free to love Amy and come here to her defense like a lap dog. That is your prerogative. I, for one, have never questioned Amy’s gender (I am absolutely certain she has two X chromosomes! No man would behave the way she does.), nor do I comment on the mentally retarded. Idiots, yes; the handicapped, no. I personally have much first-hand experience with handicapped children (and adults) and would never compare them to actual viscious, amoral idiots like Amy Alkon.

    I have just spent one of the most unpleasant hours of my life this morning reading the archives of Ms. Alkon’s Advice Goddess blog, and I find her opinions and viewpoint to be beyond abhorrent. She is really quite stunning in her vileness.

    I’ve known a few really mean people in my life, and it makes me sad just to be reminded of them. Amy Alkon makes me shudder. If you find her so wonderful and worth defending, that is certainly your right, but I would question the goodness of a person who would not only praise Ms. Alkon, but defend her.

    Mean people suck.

    Over and out.

  332. Rusty Shackleford said,

    February 20, 2010 at 17:30

    Farrar’s tryin’ to flex on y’all for gettin’ Triggy wit it

  333. Anonymous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 19:23

    Farrar’s tryin’ to flex on y’all for gettin’ Triggy wit it

    actually she has proved her bravado in the face of cowardice many times, just look how frequently she’s typed ‘c’ and ‘k’ directly adjacent to one another

    but…would it be out of turn to ask if farrar could keep it at momOf4 without escalating further? you know, with the overpopulation problem and whatnot.

  334. Amy's Crotch Rot said,

    February 20, 2010 at 19:24

    Amy has despicable beliefs.

    I love how this chick-with-a-dick comes to the defense of using Triggy but has no qualms throwing around the word “crotch fruit” in reference to kids.

    Get that, farrar? She thinks your kids are loathsome.

  335. Anonymous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 19:42

    Went over there for shits & giggles and this, from one of her regulars: A woman who does not smell clean really turns men off, but a horse smell implies a strong, healthy woman who likes animals and the outdoors.

    So, adding to the list of The Typical Alkon Fan, you could add:

    Feels strong attraction to horsey-smelling women.

    Guess that explains why dudes dig Alkon so much. She looks like a horse that guys wanna mount.

  336. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 21:54

    So, adding to the list of The Typical Alkon Fan, you could add:

    The worshippers of Mr. Alkon turn out to be quite a collection of (cough) LOSERS (cough)…maybe they’re all Triggy.

    We got your horse-smell lover, we got your religious divorced guy who loves shoving vibrators up his ass, we got a “book lover” whose reviews on Amazon encompass the astounding literary gold contained inside 3 trash fiction novels, and we got liars like farrar …. momof3 …. momof4 WhoKnows who openly lie about how long they’ve been part of Manny Alkon’s posse. What a bunch of uber-losers, but it’s only natural….

    Losers like Manny can only get bigger losers to be acolytes.

  337. J— said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:21

    Simple Justice says:

    The Sadly No blog is a monument to immaturity and narcissism.

    Yes and yes!

  338. SED the Infamous said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:34

    back for one more hit of crack. it’s old hat to you people but i just cant get enough.

    Simple Justice says:

    wasn’t he a contributor to this tour de force of contemporary jurisprudence:

    http://www.amazon.com/So-Sue-Me-Jackass-Avoiding/dp/0452295742/ref=cm_cr_pr_sims_t

  339. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:44

    Simple Justice says:

    He piles on the unintentional irony, and he does say that we don’t have jobs. The right wing just can’t get over thinking that little “insult” is somehow cogent, somehow cutting, somehow hurtful, to Liberals. They must think that if we hear it a billion times we’ll start crying or something.

    Their cluelessness and brainlessness never fails to make me guffaw.

  340. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:52

    Actor, you’d shit your pants if you were ever confronted by Amy

    Not really. I’d probably just head butt her and claim it was an accident, if I felt I couldn’t be bothered emotionally stripping her naked in public and leaving her in a pool of her own spittle.

    See, Farrar, the difference between you and I, the difference between Amy and I, is I’m as big a motherfucking prick in person as I am on the Internet.

    And I don’t pick on people smaller than me!

  341. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:53

    And Farrar?

    You sound kinda Triggy to me. I hope it’s not genetic.

  342. actor212 said,

    February 20, 2010 at 23:56

    Simple Justice says:

    Excuse me? “Saving Amy Alkon”?

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

    Their heroine? Their champion of taking on the big blustering bullies and beating them back into their own bullshit….needs saving??????????????

    Feet-o-clay, thy name is Arnold!

  343. SED the Infamous said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:02

    if only S, N didn’t have better things to do than shorter

    SCOTT H. GREENFIELD, ESQ.

    which one is he in that picture? (oh ahref, pls don’t forsake me)

  344. SED the Infamous said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:03

    i was forsaken.

    http://blog.simplejustice.us/2010/02/19/saving-amy-alkon.aspx

  345. actor212 said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:17

    SED

    I wouldn’t worry about it, unless you have young children:

    http://asshatlawyer.com/is-scott-h-greenfield-a-pedaphile-lawyer-or-just-a-pervert.html

  346. actor212 said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:19

    I have to laugh, tho. He uses my OLD review for his article…the one that was already taken down, so anyone who clicks thru will find…WHOOPS! There it ain’t!

  347. SED the Infamous said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:28

    SED

    I wouldn’t worry about it

    i’m SO bookmarking that. for the posterity of just-in-case. (oh shit! no pun)

  348. SED the Infamous said,

    February 21, 2010 at 0:32

    oh god…one more thing…

    from http://www.asshatlawer.com mr. greenfield, esq. is

    a self proclaimed closet gay

    how is that possible, or is it as recursive as that other amazon thread?

  349. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 21, 2010 at 1:20

    This is great. We can add a pedophile to the list of illustrious Alkonholics.

    The irony and hilarity meters are W-A-A-A-A-Y off the charts this time. The Infinite Improbabilty Drive has met its match.

  350. Sheesh said,

    February 21, 2010 at 5:17

    Is this thread still going?

    Fwiw, naming your Trisomy-G/Tri-g kid trig is a little more offensive to me than calling idiots ‘Triggy’; know what I mean?

    I mean, it’s such a fucking affront to the personal dignity of a human that may never even know it. It’s like slightly more despicable than punching babies.

  351. Sheesh said,

    February 21, 2010 at 5:19

    Also, too: I guess this never occurred to Farrar Stowe-Sanchez.

  352. crella said,

    February 21, 2010 at 11:46

    Wrong again. Don’t you know how to used a damned search engine?

    “Trig Paxson Van Palin gets his unusual name from a number of sources. Grandfather Chuck Heath told KTUU in Anchorage that Trig is named after his great uncle, a Bristol Bay fisherman, and Paxson comes from a well-known snowmachining area in Alaska.”

    Yes, “actor” the ignorance on this blog made me get out a dictionary. It’s nothing to be proud of , dear. I like to have actual facts to back my self up, unlike all of you.

    “The word “triggy” is one that I and my friends used to use to ridicule stupid people who thought they were smart.”

    It’s been a word for much longer than that. Which is why I posted a definition. I made my comment after this flash of brilliance in answer to the definition of ‘triggy’–


    Maybe in ‘pig world it is, but as we all know from the last 8 years of FAIL, you ‘pigs are the ne plus ultra, the epitome, the absolute ultimate in PURE FAIL.”

    I hope I helped you with your reading comprehension problems.

  353. actor212 said,

    February 21, 2010 at 13:22

    I like to have actual facts to back my self up, unlike all of you.

    Bringing facts to Sadly, No!, an award winning comedy blog is like bringing a cat to a gunfight.

    You really ARE Triggy, aintcha?

  354. actor212 said,

    February 21, 2010 at 13:23

    But Trigcrella, I hope I helped you with your reading comprehension problem!

    I’ve done my good deed for the day. Now I can go kick Arnold’s ass on Amazon again.

    Thanks for getting me warmed up!

  355. F'in Librul said,

    February 21, 2010 at 16:35

    “Trig Paxson Van Palin”

    I’m sorry, but that struck me like naming one’s chil Joe Jackson Van Halen. Except stupider.

  356. SED the Infamous said,

    February 22, 2010 at 0:10

    may i say, i’m so tickled to see this thread still going and

    the ignorance on THIS BLOG [emphasis mine] made me get out a dictionary.

    i think the horse’s leg just twitched.

    my husband accused me this morning of having a “blog crush…”

  357. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 22, 2010 at 15:49

    Yes, “actor” the ignorance on this blog made me get out a dictionary. It’s nothing to be proud of , dear. I like to have actual facts to back my self up

    Dear crella, you should’ve used the dictionary to look up the word “myself”.

    As always, the wingnuts write their own punchlines.

  358. actor212 said,

    February 22, 2010 at 16:25

    I like to have actual facts to back my self up

    how big a hard drive do you need to back your self up?

    And keep in mind this is one of Amy’s fangurls.

  359. You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,

    February 22, 2010 at 20:05

    how big a hard drive do you need to back your self up?

    An ancient, slow, 4MB flash drive is sufficient for the higher & lower autonomous functions.

  360. crella said,

    March 5, 2010 at 13:54

    Picking on typos means you have nothing of merit to say.

  361. Sarah said,

    March 21, 2010 at 8:10

    What sad, small lives you all must lead…

  362. amy alkon is a sick joke said,

    October 29, 2010 at 22:23

    Amy Alkon is a psychotic hypocrite. All her shitty writing really is written by a mentally ill women named Stef Willen. Alkon recently wanted to perjure herself in court to avenge someone onf Willen’s behalf. Stef Willen has been trashtalking Amy but Amy is so pleased that she is getting away with not paying her that she was willing to lie in a court of law. Amy Alkon is a nasty and disturbed little freak.

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