Nov
20
20
Happy Friday!
Oh hey look, it’s the Tea Party documentary trailer:
Things I love about this trailer:
- How they keep using footage of the same black guy over and over again to show that it’s not just an old white people movement.
- The fact that they really expect us to take them seriously when they’re dressed in tricorner hats and powdered wigs. Guys, even Raiders fans would be embarrassed to be seen with you.
- The angry, apocalyptic “IN A WORLD…”-style narration that’s used to lionize a bunch of goofy-assed white people dressed in tricorner hats and powdered wigs.
Boston readers, I’ll invite you to a screening of this fine film once I get my hands on it.
JM said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:01
Can anyone add ABBA’s “Our Last Summer” as the soundtrack to this?
A million quatloos and everlasting life to the masherupper.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:01
Didn’t I see those two in some Bartles & Jaymes commercials?
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:03
“Dr Fred”?
Sounds like a fucking vet.
wondering said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:04
Shouldn’t there be a Shorter for these kinds of things? So we don’t actually, you know, HAVE to.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:09
Palin fans, we learned last thread, are hopping mad at their heroine.
In keeping with this thread’s topic…yes, I’m staying on topic…Teabaggers are eating their own
Alex said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:09
After watching 2012, I’m afraid I’ve had my fill of documentaries for a while, so I’ll take a pass.
laym said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:11
Shouldn’t they have to, you know, accomplish something before being the subjects of a documentary?
Besides providing material for the better corners of the internets, that is.
tigrismus said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:12
Teabaggers are eating their own
Now THAT’S what I call flexible!
TruculentandUnreliable said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:13
Teabaggers are eating their own
I knew that they were zombies!
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:17
The DID accomplish something! They were able to get and erection for week after the march! First time they felt like a man since Palin personaly winked at them on TeeVee
Stephen said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:18
Somebody should just record another narration for the trailer. Something like, “They came… from another reality.” *shots of grim-looking teabaggers* “A reality where providing healthcare was somehow bad.”
laym said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:19
I wonder if Hoffman won in the movie version.
ignatov said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:19
In a world where voters go to the polls and cast votes in sufficiently high numbers as to effect the election a negro, one group has the courage to shit their pants…
Stephen said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:20
In a world where voters go to the polls and cast votes in sufficiently high numbers as to effect the election a negro, one group has the courage to shit their pants…
Well as alternate narrations go, this one is a million times better than mine.
justme said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:21
Yow.
Is that the same guy that did the voiceover for the Gathering of the Juggalos?
El Cid said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:23
If last summer’s tea party marches was the 2nd American Revolution, the standards for revolution carrying-outing must have lowered dramatically.
The 3rd American Revolution will presumably consist of a right winger refusing to walk to his mailbox in case a tax bill will be there. WOLVERINES!
Bitter Scribe said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:24
Guys, even Raiders fans would be embarrassed to be seen with you.
Patriots fans, on the other hand…
laym said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:26
Huh. Just surfed over to memeorandum, and apparently some hacked and leaked e-mails prove that global warming is a big, fat liberal lie. Somewhere, Michael Crichton is smiling.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:30
Laym, I saw that item too.
Apparently, the emails were from a climate change “authority” who already wrote some really crappy papers about the issue, and was not considered particularly reliable or authoritative.
In other words, i smell a set up.
Felonious Monk said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:30
Sometimes I look at how fucking loony these people are, and I sit back and wonder how they’d behave if an actual liberal came to power. My guess is head explosion, but I guess we’ll never know.
cyntax said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:33
Guys, even Raiders fans would be embarrassed to be seen with you.
Spoken like someone who has never been to a Raiders game and lives on the other side of the country from those cuddly individuals. Now if DA wanted to talk smack that would be impressive.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:35
Ref. Previous thread:
Mark Hemingway came to the rescue of Miller!
laym said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:36
These people are clearly in on the global warming conspiracy which is obviously a huge money maker for them because … *mumble mumble mumble* George Soros!
stryx said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:49
I could be wrong, but Teh Gazoogle found me someone with the name of Roark when I looked for Convergence Entertainment.
dcs said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:51
Please submit this to the Boston Independent Film Festival. I’d like to see it at the Somerville Theater. Thanks.
Smut Clyde said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:51
yes, I’m staying on topic…Teabaggers are eating their own
I followed the link, and found lots of quotes like this from the astroturfers:
It sounds as if they have a problem with astroturfees who do not realise the top-down nature of the situation, and are showing signs of independence.
gocart mozart said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:52
http://michellemalkin.com/2009/11/16/dear-oxford-university-press-get-a-clue-about-teabagging/ Malkin quotes Taibbi about Malkin
I have to say, I’m really enjoying this whole teabag thing. It’s really inspiring some excellent daydreaming. For one thing, it’s brought together the words teabag and Michelle Malkin for me in a very powerful, thrilling sort of way. Not that I haven’t ever put those two concepts together before, but this is the first time it’s happened while in the process of reading her actual columns.
Previously Michelle Malkin’s writing was on the edge of unreadable; she’s sort of like Ann Coulter, only without that tiny fraction of P.T. Barnum/Mick Jagger-esque self-promotional flair that makes Coulter at least vaguely interesting. When you read Ann Coulter, you know you’re reading someone who would fuck a hippopotamus if she thought it would boost her Q rating. That’s a rare quality and it commands one’s attention.
Michelle Malkin doesn’t have that. She’s just a mean little dunce who’s wedged herself into a nicely paying career as a GOP spokesclown, and she’s going to ride that gig for as long as it keeps gas in her minivan.
And that’s fine, good for her. But that doesn’t make her readable. However, this move of hers to spearhead the teabag movement really adds an element to her writing that wasn’t there before. Now when I read her stuff, I imagine her narrating her text, book-on-tape style, with a big, hairy set of balls in her mouth. It vastly improves her prose.
Smut Clyde said,
November 20, 2009 at 22:56
Teabaggers eating their own, illustrated by Ralph Steadman.
Tintin said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:00
Oh. My. Goodness. I think it’s time for Tintin to fire up the video editor and treat this trailer to the Sadly, No! Productions treatment
Judas Peckerwood said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:01
Please — these asswipes would all have been die-hard Tories if they’d been around for the Revolutionary War.
Alicia Morgan said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:05
“Are they going to be a bunch of fingers, or are they going to come together to be a fist?”
From the Politico article
Sometimes the humor writes itself.
Dain Brammaged said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:10
Teabaggers eating their own? Who had that bookmarked?
The Goddamn Batman Went To Town A'Riding On A Pony, He Kicked The Joker In The Balls And Called It Macaroni said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:12
Say what you will about Trekkies–I’ve heard it all thrice and personally lived out about half of it–at least the Klingon cosplayers aren’t a bunch of pompous asses like these yobs.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:17
at least the Klingon cosplayers aren’t a bunch of pompous asses like these yobs.
Pity you can’t say the same about the Ferengi fanbois.
Wyatt Watts III said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:19
SPOILER ALERT!
The dog survives.
Andrew N.P. said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:24
Hey, if they aren’t embarrassed to be Raiders fans, they can’t have much shame.
Also:
IN A WORLD…
Where a colored man sits in the White House…
Where a woman and a Mormon run the Congress…
Where the government no longer answers to 28% of the people…
Millions… I mean, thousands… will rise up…
And take back… what they never had.
Tea Party.
This November… teabag them… before they teabag you.
Pere Ubu said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:26
You know, in a sick masochistic way I’m looking forward to getting home this evening so I can see just how pitiful those AmRev cosplayers can be.
I bet the lot of them have never read The Federalist Papers, much less know anything about thw Revolution they didn’t learn from repeated watchings of Johnny Tremain and Schoolhouse Rock.
Pere Ubu said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:27
Millions… I mean, thousands… will rise up…
Tens.
Dozens, maybe.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:29
Millions… I mean, thousands… will rise up…
Tens.
Dozens, maybe.
Handful of people will rise up.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:32
Millions… I mean, thousands… will rise up…
Tens.
Dozens, maybe.
Handful of people will rise up.
Pam Atlass and Vern Troyer will rise up.
Sockpuppet #47 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:34
.. Rise up, and then sit back down again, panting heavily at the unaccustomed exercise.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:36
.. Rise up, and then sit back down again, panting heavily at the unaccustomed exercise.
At least Vern and Pam will see eye to eye on the issues.
Well, eye to teat.
ploeg said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:40
Will they become a fist, or will they become a single, extended finger?
Sort of answers itself.
Felonious Monk said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:43
Rise up, and then sit back down again, panting heavily at the unaccustomed exercise
…But they will still find a way to blame it on the government. Somehow.
Trying to take away their popcorn, or maybe give it to them.
Also.
Smut Clyde said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:44
“Are they going to be a bunch of fingers, or are they going to come together to be a fist?”
It is time to be printing up the sloganned t-shirts — “We Must All Hang Together or we shall End Up Well-Hung” — to sell at the next rally of the recently-retitled Fisters.
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:49
“We Must All Hang Together or we shall End Up Well-Hung” — to sell at the next rally of the recently-retitled Fisters.
I’m trying really hard not to laugh too loudly, what with my boss one door down shouting in the telephone…
J Neo Marvin said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:53
Please — these asswipes would all have been die-hard Tories if they’d been around for the Revolutionary War.
Is that why they’re dressed like Redcoats?
reverter said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:53
“Please — these asswipes would all have been die-hard Tories if they’d been around for the Revolutionary War.” Judas Peckerwood [still don't have ANY html skillz]
They also would have been shouting “crucify him” at Jesus.
reverter said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:54
That’s me that duznt haz the skillz, not JP
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:55
Is that why they’re dressed like Redcoats?
It would be irresponsible not to point this out to them
At an approrpiate moment.
phleabo said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:55
Why are there so many forcefully opinionated retards in America?
Pere Ubu said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:57
Unless they become a fist, how will they fap?
(I mean, sure, women can do it the other way, but that’s WOMEN and what do they know about Noble Revolution anyway?)
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:58
Why are there so many forcefully opinionated retards in America?
Impacted bowels from eating too much movie popcorn
actor212 said,
November 20, 2009 at 23:59
Unless they become a fist, how will they fap?
Iron fist, velvet glove.
So THAT’S where that saying comes from!
Andrew N.P. said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:02
Hm? Hm…
Excuse me for one moment. I’m off to buy some velvet gloves. For SCIENCE!
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:08
Who do you have to pork before Amazon will publish your snarky review? I can’t believe Hark Memingway got in there before me.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:08
Excuse me for one moment. I’m off to buy some velvet gloves. For SCIENCE!
Just make sure you don’t do it so much that you go blind.
You know, with science.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:09
Who do you have to pork before Amazon will publish your snarky review?
The Council on Foreign Relations
I drew the short straw and got Angelina Jolie.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:10
Rusty, are you Christopher?
It’s up.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:12
No, I’m not Christopher. Mine still isn’t up. I’d tell you my extraordinarily clever nym but I’m afraid Mark Hemingway [sic] would tattle.
Stag Party Palin said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:13
“Why are there so many forcefully opinionated retards in America?”
Remember, it’s the empty tin cans that make the most noise.
Tommmcatt said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:13
Oh, sweet Jesus, they actually are dressed as redcoats. I had to go back and look, because my brains obviously could not process that much ironic stupidity on the first go-round.
Next they’ll launch into a screed about protecting the world from fascism dressed as brownshirts, I suppose. Or protest gay rights dressed in workboots, cutoff shorts and a plaid shirt with the arms torn out..
pedestrian said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:14
Is that why they’re dressed like Redcoats?
I think those ones ARE Redcoats – at least the one saying “We’ll give them some fiscal stimulus” is.
See, the way it went down was, the British wanted to save the American banking system and improve infrastructure and offer healthcare, and that’s why the Patriots revolted. The Stamp Act was an attempt to create a postal service, which is also communist.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:18
Troofie is replying to the negative reviews of Miller’s “book”
Hi Troofie! It’s nice to see the ban is still in effect!
*waving*
Pere Ubu said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:20
Why are there so many forcefully opinionated retards in America?
Making them is the one manufacturing industry we haven’t outsourced yet.
*sings* LOOK FOR, THE WINGNUT LABEL…
ignatov said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:20
Amazon (re: Miller’s book [re: the previous thread]):
“The most helpful favorable review… 2 of 8 people found the following review helpful:”
Heh.
vacuumslayer said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:21
“IN A WORLD where morans threaten to deluge the streets to take back their country and super-straight men in wigs and tights fight for their rights to call uppity presidents ‘nigger’ with impunity…”
J Neo Marvin said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:22
I think those ones ARE Redcoats – at least the one saying “We’ll give them some fiscal stimulus” is.
Ah. Where would they be without their strawmen?
Alicia Morgan said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:27
I got Troofied! Lucky me!
Pere Ubu said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:30
“IN A WORLD where morans threaten to deluge the streets to take back their country and super-straight men in wigs and tights fight for their rights to call uppity presidents ‘nigger’ with impunity…”
Don’t forget the oily popcorn and Oily Taters.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:30
Where would they be without their strawmen?
Alone with their rubber ladies.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:35
You think you’re kidding, but I’ve got three words for you: Instant mashed potatoes. Don’t ask.
Dan Someone said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:41
“They’re fractured at the organization level, I think mainly because there are a lot of people who have not had managerial experience who all of a sudden are thrust into the limelight and become intoxicated with it. And when a potential rift comes up, instead of handling it and maybe agreeing to disagree, they splinter and go off on their own.”
They really should have taken a lesson from the Judean People’s Front, after their nasty schism from the People’s Front of Judea.
Pere Ubu said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:45
SPLITTERS!
J— said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:45
The teabagging documentary was written by Joel Aaron Foster.
Speaking of writing, some nuggets from the documentary’s meet the characters section.
Don’t miss William’s hefty resume. He, too, was moved to action.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:48
They’re fractured at the organization level, I think mainly because there are a lot of people who have not had managerial experience who all of a sudden are thrust into the limelight and become intoxicated with it.
These self-proclaimed paragons of spontaneity and independence are not paying enough attention to their instructions.
Boneless Meatloaf said,
November 21, 2009 at 0:53
If these doofi had been around in the 1700s they would totally have been royalists anyway. That’s the ultimate joke.
El Cid said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:01
Doesn’t the ventriloquist always follow the Stamp Act, but before the jugglers?
J— said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:01
Dr. Fred is vice-president of Docs 4 Patient Care, a kill any and all health care reform front group.
Dr. Fred’s 2008 political campaign contributions.
J— said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:03
And some rate your doctor fun.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:15
Clearly the man to go to for all your camera-up-urethra requirements.
Carrie Prejean's Schlick Flick Vol. 10: Autoneurotic Ass Fixation said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:25
Courtesy TPM: Teabagger [c]Rap arteste, Hi Caliber. This is not a veiled gonad reference.
At least, not more than usual.
Carrie Prejean's Schlick Flick Vol. 12: Letting the Wookie Win said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:29
Don’t forget the oily popcorn and Oily Taters.
Don’t eat too much oily popcorn and oily taters, y’all, unless you all want…
wait for it…
you know it’s coming…
Oily Taints, y’all!
Carrie Prejean's Schlick Flick Vol. 14: 'I hide my straight razor in here' said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:39
Actor, your review is up. I give it 5 stars. It has a beat and you can dance to it.
(Also, sadlynauts, if you don’t want that piece of crap tainting your Amazon recommendations, then visit this page to remove it from your browsing history.)
N__B said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:41
a lot of people who … are thrust into the limelight and become intoxicated with it.
Morons. You don’t drink lime gas. It’s poisonous.
Captain Shit said,
November 21, 2009 at 1:57
I wore a tricorn hat once. It was for a role in Dancing at Lughnasa. It was surprisingly cool. I can see why one would want to make up an excuse to wear one of those things.
noen said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:00
““Are they going to be a bunch of fingers, or are they going to come together to be a fist?””
Obviously what they need is something to bind these little ‘fingers’ or rods into one stronger bundle. What should we call that? Maybe fasces? Throw an ax in for good measure?
N__B said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:03
What should we call that?
Feces.
Throw an ax in for good measure?
Lincoln logs.
Woodrowfan said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:10
While I am not certain how historically accurate these uniforms are, some American units DID wear red uniforms..
But yeah, these teaclowns would have been die-hard royalists during the war. I can see them protesting the Continental Congress with “I Want My Colony back” signs…
J— said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:14
Writer J.A. Foster on the film.
J— said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:28
What do you know, they were filming for the movie when the supposed bomb threat came in.
El Cid said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:37
I WANT MY CLOVIS TOOL ERA BACK…
Pere Ubu said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:40
“I Want My Colony back” signs
More like “High Colonic” signs.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:40
I want my colon back.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 21, 2009 at 2:55
So, since the summer of teabag the health care bills have passed the house, the senate committees, and the Senate defied conventional wisdom to include a triggerless public option, making the bill even more socialest than expected.
Also a Democrat won NY-23 for the first time since there was a Whig party.
Yes, clearly this litany of accomplishment deserves a congratulatory documentary. Sheesh, at least liberals account the many times bigger demonstrations against the Iraq war to be a failure since, you know, the war still happened. We weren’t like “yay, we held a march, and people actually showed up! High fives!”
acrannymint said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:02
justme -
I am drawn back and back again to the “Gathering of the Juggaloos”
It might be that it has been a long frustrating week at work but I have approached a “I’m going to pee myself” laughing state.
justme said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:09
I wish I could find the whole infomercial. It was 15 minutes of unadulterated wtf.
M. Bouffant said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:10
Since you (almost) asked: More on Juggalos & their part in the justice system.
Shameless, but on the (current) topic. How long until the ‘baggers qualify as gang members?
M. Bouffant said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:14
justyou, try digging at ICP Central. (Dangerous to eyes & sanity.)
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:43
How soon before the Teabaggers start spraying each other with Faygo?
Jennifer said,
November 21, 2009 at 3:44
Well, if they’re going to stick with the “Tea Party” theme – having fled from the name they formerly adopted for themselves – Teabaggers – then what choice do they leave us? We shall be forced to photoshop them in pinafores and bonnets, with dollies and dainty little tea-sets. I would suggest photoshopping them into the Alice in Wonderland tea party, except I can’t narrow down who should be the Mad Hatter. So a generic tea party it will have to be – and that’s not so bad. While nothing will ever match the schadenfreudeliciousness of seeing the biggest homophobes in the country christen themselves “teabaggers” – until someone told them for a few months what it meant and they finally caught on – portraying themselves as a bunch of little girls isn’t very far off the mark, either – if we’re talking stupid, whiny, bratty little girls.
Rafar said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:00
This ace piece has to be worth a look.
“I have never in my life heard a man/woman rant so angrily about a woman’s vagina.”
http://minx.cc/?post=294877
Playdough and bacon?
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:01
a Libertarian [...] is risking the anger of family and friends
Protip: To heighten the dramatic tension of the film and to rouse our sympathy for the risk the character undergoes, it would help not to tell us right at the start that he defines himself by his unconcern about the anger of family and friends.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:07
We shall be forced to photoshop them in pinafores and bonnets, with dollies and dainty little tea-sets.
When she was of that age, the Doktorling Sonja never arranged tea parties for her toys. She did occasionally announce that they were going down to the pub, and would sit them down at a little table with little glasses of water in front of each one… which was all very well until Maxy the Cat would have too many and start talking trash about the spinor approach to quantum gravity — and Dead Ted would headbutt someone — and Sonja would ban them all until next time.
gocart mozart said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:08
Whatever consenting adults do in the privacy of their own bedroom should be their own business. Leave the teabaggers alone.
Bitter Scribe said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:15
Eric Zorn of the Chicago Tribune did a poll about the use of “Teabagger.” The choices were: “a childish insult that should be avoided,” “a perfectly fine descriptive term,” and the winner, “A childish insult, but who cares?”
Felonious Monk said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:16
How soon before the teabaggers start spraying each other with faygo.
As soon as we start a rumor that teh liebrals are planning to B&N it. And black and white face paint. And cheap rap music.
My God, this could be epic. This could be like those college students who tricked their professor into standing on a wastebasket.
Felonious Monk said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:19
So, since the summer of teabag the health care bills have passed the house, the senate committees, and the Senate defied conventional wisdom to include a triggerless public option, making the bill even more socialest than expected.
So, what are the odds that if I tune into some librul meeja, I’ll be berated with talk about how health care reform is ON THE MOTHERFUCKIN ROCKS and could be decimated any minute now?
I won’t, of course. I have my health to consider. But I do love telling my conservative acquaintances how “x will never be accomplished” keeps becoming a more and more liberal statement.
g said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:29
I got confused when they were talking about Lady Liberty. Aren’t they in Washington? Lady Liberty’s in New York. Are they going to break her off the island and haul her down to DC?
N__B said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:31
Aren’t they in Washington? Lady Liberty’s in New York. Are they going to break her off the island and haul her down to DC?
She’s hollow. If they blow enough hot air up her skirt, she’ll float in mid-air.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:31
Playdough and bacon?
To be fair to Ace, I call it a Facehugger myself!
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:37
Lady Liberty’s in New York. Are they going to break her off the island and haul her down to DC?
She’s hollow.
Also French, and welcoming to new immigrants.
N__B said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:38
She’s hollow.
Also French, and welcoming to new immigrants.
Oooh, lol lol
Bitter Scribe said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:42
An edited version of her poem:
Give meConcerning your tired, your poor, your yearning to be free,The wretched refuse from your teeming shore,
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tos’t
to memy best regards,I lift my lamp beside the golden door!
(h/t Tom Toles)
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:11
The fact is, liberals, fuck you. Seriously, Sarah Palin, a maverick for a new generation, is a phenon, and will be the next USA President, and before 2012 you betcha! You are all going down as the Real Americans In The Heartland show you how irelevent you are with your left wing media bias.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:20
The fact is, address my points, liberals! DEBATE ME WITH FACTS!
g said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:20
Is anyone here acquainted with the economics of the publishing business?
Who pays for book tours? The publisher? Do they deduct against the advance on royalties?
Flying a novelist around the country and putting him/her up in a hotel for the day he goes down and sits at a table in Borders is probably pretty cheap.
But what about a painted bus, the cost of fuel, a driver, hotel rooms for the entourage (she’s got Trigg and probably the whole fam damily along, plus managers), meals, plus with crowds that size they have got to have some security or crowd management personnel.
How much does all that cost, and who gets stuck with the bill? Has little Sarah read her contract carefully?
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:23
the fact is, g, shut up.
Obama sticks US the taxpayers for the bills for his photo-ops with terrorists and black people. Sarahs tour is paid for by the free market and the people.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:28
So how does Sarah Palin (or anybody other than Joe Biden, and so on down the list) become “USA President” before 2012 (actually 2013), exactly? Walk us through the details of this process, Gary. I’m fascinated!
green said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:32
Gary R., is it really you? Do you really exist? Did I actually just devote nearly a minute of my life to watching a trailer for the teabagger movie?
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:33
Seriously, Sarah Palin, a maverick for a new generation, is a phenon, and will be the next USA President, and before 2012 you betcha!
“Clusters of similar groups are termed phenons and phenons may be assigned rank according to the level on the phenogram at which they branch off.”
So Sarah’s a group-cluster in a dendrogram OMG THAT IS SO KEWL!!!
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:34
The fact is, the main reason we love Sarah Pailin Here In The Heartland is the Liberals hate her, do we need a better reason? Oh yeah, she supports the consitution and limited government and strong USA.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:35
The fact is, you all support Barry Sotero because he is affirmative action BLACKBLACKBLACK and no other reason. Debate that with me.
green said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:36
I’m calling fake Gary here. The real Gary never used obscenities (i.e., “fuck”). Also, he never made spelling mistakes (i.e., “phenon” for “phenom”). He was reliable that way, like a hangover.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:37
The fact is, why are liberals so supportive of BLACKS and FAGGOTS? Answer me that and address my point!
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:38
I WANT MY CLOVIS TOOL ERA BACK…
I swoon!
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 4:07 (kill)
That story is almost enough to make me want kid. But I’ll sober up.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:40
@ green:
Gary Ruppert is really a consortium, like Bourbaki. Yeah, just like Bourbaki…that’s the ticket!
Boneless Meatloaf said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:41
Sarah says you should exercise and quit eating popcorn.
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:42
I’m calling fake Gary here.
Maybe he’s a mean drunk? This one does lack a certain was weiß ich nicht, though.
g said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:42
Fake Gary.
Or psychotic Gary, take your pick.
Seriously, though, I’m really curious about the economics here. I have a relative who’s written a book, admittedly for an academic press. And his publisher hits him for all kinds of marketing costs.
What kind of advance did she get, 1.5 million? a month’s bus tour could eat into that pretty good.
green said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:43
Very Reverend, I always felt that Gary R. was some kind of mass hallucination. An undigested bit of beef, etc.
g said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:43
Sarahs tour is paid for by the free market and the people.
It might just be paid for by her. I’m just sayin’.
Jennifer said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:43
I think Smut’s wife is actually named Sophie, and was the protagonist in Sophie’s World.
Guest said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:45
“The fact is, why are liberals so supportive of BLACKS and FAGGOTS? Answer me that and address my point!”
I just fell in love.
jim said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:46
I want my 99 seconds back.
Except for the VO guy.
Hard to even put into words just how royally (heh) pissed I’d be if I was a Yankee & had to keep seeing a pack of goobers like this on my TeeVee, ignorantly hijacking profound historical tropes like the Boston Tea Party or the American Revolution for … for … who fucking knows what.
Methinks the REAL original Patriots would’ve just looooooooved to invite these blockheads to a wee party of their own – complete with a nice tar-&-feather wardrobe to take home afterwards.
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:54
Guest, don’t give in so easily, Gary can be so much hotter than that!
The Kid from Kounty Meath said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:55
I always thought of Gary as more of a wingnut Dread Pirate Roberts, given how many different personas he has. Of course, it’s equally likely that he’s just some shitbird who’s off his meds at varying degrees throughout the day.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:56
The fact is, why do I give so many blowjobs to BLACKS and FAGGOTS? Answer me that and caress my taint!
Guest said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:57
tigrismus:
hotter than that? *swoon*
i would follow that person and/or perl script to the ends of the *earth*
Gary Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 5:59
The fact is, all you hippies need a haircut. Also, eat a cheeseburger and salute the flag once in a while, would you?
Ruppert Kitteh said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:01
The fact is, i can haz cheezburger for USA FREEDOM.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:07
The fact is, all you hippies need a haircut.
You tell ‘em, Gary!
Jennifer said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:20
Zen koan for your typical tea
baggerpartier:I am eating a Happy Meal, yet I am filled with RAGE.
Really sums it up pretty well, I think.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:31
I’ve been operating under the assumption that all “gary” posts are sock puppet mocking of trolls. Am I wrong? Is there really someone who shows up here to start every post with “the fact is…” in complete seriousness?
M. Bouffant said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:31
Eat my haircut, reactionary!
M. Bouffant said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:35
In a … long, long ago, there was a actual conservative drooler (or at least an actual Internet identity as a conservative & drooler) who trolled under the name of Gary Ruppert. Now, Gary Ruppert is all robo-trolls, cheap imitations, parodists & other such web detritus.
Hoosier X said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:44
OK. So here’s my question. Does New Jersey not have any other bookstores, except for the one at the Fort Bragg commissary?
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:46
Now, Gary Ruppert is all robo-trolls, cheap imitations, parodists & other such web detritus.
I am
SpartacusGary Ruppert!!!WOLVERINES!!!!
Jennifer said,
November 21, 2009 at 6:46
The faux Gary Rupperts generally rank somewhere between mildly annoying and mildly amusing, though, making them superior to most robo-trolls.
Fake Garys/Various Young Girls in Support Groups said,
November 21, 2009 at 7:17
Gary Ruppert is inside all of us.
Nosfer-Blart-Two said,
November 21, 2009 at 7:22
I must call my claims adjustor toot sweet. My viewscreen has been pockmarked by a electro-hailstorm and sundry internet spewn gravel.
Art said,
November 21, 2009 at 7:26
For some extra teabaggery goodness, search youtube for a video by “Hi Caliber.”
Get some knitting needles first, you’ll want to shove them in your ears afterward.
We Are The Cargo Cult For Ruppert said,
November 21, 2009 at 7:30
We are the Cargo Cult For Gary Ruppert. We dwell upon our small island in the internets streams, drinking orange soda, and waiting for Gary Ruppert to wash up on our shores to disgorge invective, half-assed suppositions, and lies. Eventually we’ll toss him into the volcano.
wha? said,
November 21, 2009 at 8:25
So, it’s been so long since I’ve been here, that I’m not sure how to direct attention to particularly stupid/openly homicidal right wing blogs/comments. By tragic accident, I found a bunch of nuts crakcing jokes about murdering mexicans.
It’s beyond stupid. It’s shootingsportsman.com -”General Interest (best place to live) thread. Don’t worry if you don’t find the right thread, though. My guess is that they all end up discussing murdering people.
Please. Know up front. All hunters aren’t idoits like these guys. Also, it appears that the majority of them are from somewhere besides sweet Dixie (and I mean that).
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 21, 2009 at 8:30
If Gary Ruppert washes up with Meg Ryan on the raft with him, I’ll eat Abe Vigoda’s head…and hold her back when I throw him in the volcano.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 9:39
We dwell upon our small island in the internets streams, drinking orange soda.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 9:44
This one does lack a certain was weiß ich nicht
If that is German for “I need more wheatbeer”, then I know exactly how he feels.
phenons may be assigned rank according to the level on the phenogram at which they branch off.
I only read S,N! for the cladistics discussions.
RvB said,
November 21, 2009 at 13:40
Actually, what these teabaggers remind me of is an Adam and the Ants video: you don’t think, you’re havin’ a stroke, what do you do?
Andrew A. Gill, SLS said,
November 21, 2009 at 14:01
Wow. That really sounds like Don LaFontaine.
He died on September 1, though, so I suspect that’s not actually him. Huh.
(On the other hand, it might be interesting if it proves to actually be Don LaFontaine, because that would mean that they got him to read the copy for the trailer before the 9/12 teabagger rally. I don’t think any other documentary filmmakers will write the copy for a trailer before the events depicted in the trailer actually happen…)
Shell Goddamnit said,
November 21, 2009 at 14:06
Of course Ace is an asshole, wrong about almost everything, and hangs out with disgusting people, but I have to admit he’s got a point there about Sullivan & his Palin weirdness. The doctored cartoon is particularly choice. But then, I’m no fan of Sullivan’s anyway, so the Palin craziness is just another reason to ignore him. Which there are plenty of anyway. Also, &c, &c.
kiki said,
November 21, 2009 at 14:40
I love Nate. I think Nate has a future career as a spokestoken for the GOP. ‘Nate the Builder’, they’ll call him. And then we’ll find out that his name is actually Julian and he’s an accountant.
Snowwy said,
November 21, 2009 at 17:20
Jennifer, that koan just brought the sun up for me. Thank you.
Ruppert Kitteh said,
November 21, 2009 at 19:48
I maed u a logical argument, but USA FREEDOM eated it.
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 20:27
Eventually we’ll toss him into the volcano.
“The fact iiiiiiiiiiiis….” *splort*
And catnip and scritchies for the kitteh.
tigrismus said,
November 21, 2009 at 20:39
i would follow that person and/or perl script to the ends of the *earth*
I know, right? Though I think actually perl would be an upgrade. He’s probably written in some proprietary visual assembly script, “the power of LOGO with the ease of machine language.”
Simba B said,
November 21, 2009 at 21:20
Since no one did it.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2009 at 21:41
Excuse mah bunch of fin-GEHS comin together to be a FIST.
Mr. Wonderful said,
November 21, 2009 at 21:47
“An undigested bit of beef, etc.”
There’s more of gravy than of the Gary in him, then.
Josh Fulton said,
November 22, 2009 at 7:07
What is the US really doing with Iran’s “frozen” assets?
http://joshfulton.blogspot.com/2009/11/what-is-us-doing-with-irans-frozen.html
DAS said,
November 22, 2009 at 16:03
Sometimes I look at how fucking loony these people are, and I sit back and wonder how they’d behave if an actual liberal came to power. My guess is head explosion, but I guess we’ll never know. – Felonious Monk
I don’t understand why the Dems don’t run such a person for president. I know some people who aren’t all that liberal who would majorly support a moonbat just to see wingnut heads explode.
Although, FWIW, the same thing can be said about the GOoPers. Many GOoPers aren’t all that reactionary — they just happen to have an irrational fear of hippies and have forgotten the 1960s are over (or at least can’t stand the fact that, in spite of GOoPer political domination, social progress is still being made*).
* perhaps we should rethink the “GOoPers are effective but Dems are teh suck at political power playing” meme — in spite of their political dominance for so long, GOoPers couldn’t even stop the clock on certain issues … forget about turning it back.
Tim said,
November 24, 2009 at 14:08
got this link while reading Drudge Report this morning…
Wow! what a shallow group of kooks, I don’t even understand what most of you are trying to say….one word to describe–”stupid”
actor212 said,
November 24, 2009 at 19:16
got this link while reading Drudge Report this morning…
Wow! what a shallow group of kooks, I don’t even understand what most of you are trying to say….one word to describe–”stupid”
Unintentional self-referential humour is the absolute best. Reads Drudge, can’t understand, calls it stupid.
Gotta love it!
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