11
Don’t know much about industry
Over at RenewMyVows, Kristia Cavere has got it going on:
The list of industries which have failed is alarming: textiles, automobile, production, agricultural, energy, healthcare, banking, education. This is the logical outcome of the ever-growing Democratic control of American industry, which has, during the course of the past fifty years, accomplished their ideal form of socialism. The government now controls the innovation of business, and while commerce is floundering Washington is giving taxpayer-funded subsidies to their comrades.
Let us concede, right from the start, that we don’t care about the production industry. We don’t even know why anyone would even want to go into the producting industry. As for the rest Kristia is totally right: if there is one reason why the textiles industry has failed (alarming us in the process), it’s the government. It’s not competition from low-wage countries coupled with free trade agreements. No, no, no: instead the Democrats have achieved their goal of socialism which is to take control of an industry in order to ensure that it fails. (Or is the ideal form of socialism the goal of American industry? It’s hard to tell.)
And we do miss the energy industry — indeed, we’re glad we live in Germany and, unlike our US-based readers, can access Sadly, No! on electricity-powered computers rather than those that rely scurrying hamsters.
In 1993, Congress passed the Budget Reconciliation Act (now Section 162(m) of the Internal Revenue Code) due to their belief that financial executives weren’t taking enough risks. Instead of allowing salary to reward the performance of directors Congress favored stock options as executive compensation, which they believed would increase risk and which they allowed to qualify for limitless corporate tax deductions. Now Congress is blaming the very risk taking that they forced on the financial industry, as the reason for the current economic crisis.
Because in the old days, (short-term) performance-based compensation didn’t encourage risks, whereas stock options do, because the evolution of a company’s shares is totally unrelated to its performance. And when something is tax-deductible, it means that the ideal of socialism has been achieved. Along with the production industry. Also, management is typically made up of liberals:
The Democrats destroyed our industries, and those that were most controlled by the Democrats are the industries which are the most damaged through unions and left-leaning management.
Yet no introduction of a new wingnut would be complete without an Amazing Wingnut Fact:
It is a façade that Republicans control Wall Street and big business. Most of those who contributed to Obama’s campaign were from large businesses in the financial industry.
Well, we’d like to close with something innovative here but seeing as how the government controls the innovation business, to which we belong, we’ll offer this: Kristia has come here to chew bubblegum and make a total ass of herself. And she’s all out of bubblegum.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:00
Yeah, but Hollywood movies kick ass all over the world!
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:02
Yeah, but Hollywood movies kick ass all over the world!
That’s because Hollywood is controlled by Republicans, as you will often hear at Big Hollywood. Or maybe it’s the opposite, I can’t remember.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:06
Well, the Democrat-controlled abortion industry is doing quite well, but does Miss Cavegirl give the party its props?
cyntax said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:11
Sweet jeebus, save us from republican kewpie dolls trying to do economic analysis.
lefty wingnut gocart mozart said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:15
“Well, the Democrat-controlled abortion industry is doing quite well”
This soon will be outsourced to India. Damned Hindifascists!!
gocart mozart said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:21
fix my screen name dammit.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:22
Wait — past 50 years? Democrats have been in charge the past 50 years?
Holy fuck — the Republicans had the Congress from 1994 to 2000-fucking-6.
Have they gotten to the point that they truly believe no one else will remember as far as 3 fucking years ago?
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:24
Democrats have been in charge the past 50 years?
Yes. Including the entire span of the war with Iran which has been going on since 1979, and during which Democrat President Reagan sold arms to the enemy.
cyntax said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:25
Have they gotten to the point that they truly believe no one else will remember as far as 3 fucking years ago?
Since they don’t, why should anyone else? Putting themselves in the place of others ain’t exactly their wheelhouse.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:28
Have they gotten to the point that they truly believe no one else will remember as far as 3 fucking years ago?
Three years ago, when President Clinton melted down the statue of the bull on Wall Street and used the bronze to cast humorless dildos for man-hating lesbians? You mean that 3 years ago?
zsa said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:30
What are you? Some bottom-feeding, scum-sucking algae eater?
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:34
someone doesn’t know what “facade” means.
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:37
So democratic control started unabated 50 years ago? Oh where are brave GOP leaders like FDR and Truman when you need them?
Pauly Two Times said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:39
I used to work in the industry industry. Now I work in the business business. Now I’m going to get the papers get the papers.
gocart mozart said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:39
That whole Iran/Contra thing, fucking liberals.
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:40
Looking at her picture, it looks like the Facebook school of cropping- ” I love this picture but I need to crop out the loser behind me, no one will notice my arm at this weird angle and the half hand under it.”
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:40
The building industry has been hamstrung by unnecessary government regulations on façades and Potemkin villages.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:41
I used to work in the industry industry.
Then you got beri-beri and had to go to Baden-Baden for the cure-cure.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:42
In 1993, Congress passed the Budget Reconciliation Act (now Section 162(m) of the Internal Revenue Code) due to their belief that financial executives weren’t taking enough risks. Instead of allowing salary to reward the performance of directors Congress favored stock options as executive compensation, which they believed would increase risk and which they allowed to qualify for limitless corporate tax deductions.
Oh bullshit. The rationale at the time was that the outrageous salaries people were awarding themselves and their buddies were not related to job performance at all, while stock options were totally performance-based because the worth of the stock depends on how the company’s actually doing. Who takes bigger risks, someone whose salary is insulated from bad results or someone whose pay takes a big hit when s/he gambles on something stupid?
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:43
I used to work in the industry industry.
Hey I worked in the Walla Wall office of industry industry! Do you know Bob?
Galactic Dustbin said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:43
Walla WALLA
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:46
Also, apparently stock options as part of executive compensation became widespread in the 50’s according to Donald P. Delves.
Michael G. said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:46
I’m used to the “who’s GW Bush?” routine, but the “what Reagan?” bit is new to me. I need to go collect my brain from the splatter on the wall behind me.
N.C. said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:46
The “education industry” has failed?
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:47
Maybe “past fifty years” is just a fancy way of saying “some time in the past that I don’t know and frankly am too lazy to look up or whatever”.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:48
Note that what’s-her-face has a master’s degree, so yeah.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:48
The “education industry” has failed?
In at least one case, evidently.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:48
Luckily for Ms Cavere, the “Making Shit Up” industry has never been more lucrative.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:49
Go back to your own blog, Mr Gravitino.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:50
The beating-Smut-to-the-joke industry is doing swell.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:51
Eight million years ago, when George W. Bush was elected, the economic was successfuller. Now that Obama has been President for the last 300 million years, America has lost its spirit of innovation that Ronald Reagan gave to Adam Smith 200 billion years ago, and we may never get it back.
N.C. said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:52
Also, there are vegetables on that sandwich. Also.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:57
Kristia Cavere
Has thoughts she’d like to share.
She can’t maintain her bonhomie
Since Democrats trashed the economy.
Michael G. said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:59
So this is socialism?
Okay, okay. Mustering all of my sympathy, here’s my theory of this bit of nuttiness: Cavere can see that the economy isn’t working. It’s full of a corrupt union between corporate executives and politicians. But in her universe, bad politicians are called Democrats and corporatism is socialism. Maybe it’s all just a poverty of vocabulary on Ms. Cavere’s part.
well acquainted with the velvet glove said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:01
as always a grain of truth. she’s right that the same interests, families, and businesses stand at the whip handle end of both putative wings of the american property party. beyond that, of course, the poor girl child has made a regular pig’s breakfast of her own talking points.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:09
TORTURE THE KULAKS!!!
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:10
Link for the foregoing.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:12
I dress the neighborhood children up in costumes so that they may learn from recent historical events, but they never know what I’m talking about, and the parents are getting better with their restraining orders.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:15
Maybe it’s all just a poverty of vocabulary on Ms. Cavere’s part.
And I suppose you just want to redistribute vocabulary from those of us who happen to have earned ourselves more words?! You socialists are all the same.
Malaclypse said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:15
Sweet jeebus, save us from republican kewpie dolls trying to do economic analysis.
She’s worse than McMegan.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:16
I dress my kid up as a Kenyan birth certificate registrar and OFF WE GO!
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:18
And the libruls do not care what sort of inflation crisis they are endangerating by spending our vocabulary into debt.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:18
I coulda picked other quotes. Any other quotes of hers. Randomly. And has the same thing to say to any or all of them.
“These words do mean what you think they mean. None of them. Nor in any order you place them.”
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:19
Or “had.”
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:20
Three years ago, when President Clinton melted down the statue of the bull on Wall Street and used the bronze to cast humorless dildos for man-hating lesbians?
Boy, y’know, just sayin’, but those would be COLD, wouldn’t they?
Or maybe man-hating humorless-dildo-using lesbians LIKE cold. Hell if I know.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:22
It is a façade that Republicans control Wall Street and big business.
well, YEAH, other than the fact that
a) corporations are inherently conservative by their very nature, and
b) she doesn’t know what the fuck “façade ” means, but boy, did she do that “funny c” thing. How can you argue with high-ANSI, after all?
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:24
KICK AÇÇ!!!
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:24
I notice there’s been very little coverage of the Stupak debacle on this blog. Keep carrying water for the Democrats, folks. We told you Progressives would be thrown under the Hope™ and Change™ sooner or later. Looks like Obama and his party chose “sooner”.
Told you so! The biggest restrictions on abortion rights in a quarter century–passed under the party you voted for. Just goes to show what I said was right, that we have one party in this country with two right wings.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:26
Meant to say thrown under the Hope™ and Change™ Bus etc.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:27
There was a comprehensive article between the sports section and the op-ed page.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:28
And you all are still going to vote for the Democrats next time, aren’t you? And volunteer for them. And give them money.
Talk about battered wife syndrome…
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:29
I notice there’s been very little coverage of the Stupak debacle on this blog.
That’s the thing with the mayonnaise, right?
Every time I order it they always overcook the Stupak and it’s all mushy.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:29
Or maybe man-hating humorless-dildo-using lesbians LIKE cold. Hell if I know.
The fact is, this just proves that LIEberaals are the real homephobes.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:30
In New Zealand, in order to teach history in a creative and memorable way, the Nanny State draws a picture on the pavement with magic chalk, and we step into it.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:31
The fact is, this just proves that LIEberaals are the real homephobes.
I support the right of homophones to Mary.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:32
Shirley you meant “the rite of homophones”.
Andrew N.P. said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:33
Hey, does the Nanny State really wear those green and white striped socks, or was that just a creative liberty by the show?
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:34
Shirley you meant “the rite of homophones”.
Writes of homophones.
And don’t call me surely.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:35
The episode where Simon was beaten senseless by a chalk football hooligan was a little dark.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:37
I want to know where that poster who said the only reason I didn’t support Democrats is because I am a white male, and that we needed to keep Democrats in office instead of voting for the Green Party because Republicans would mean abortion restrictions, and I just COULDN’T understand that because I was a white male.
That argument looks kind of fucking dumb now, doesn’t it? You know, given the fact the Democrats just passed major restrictions on abortion rights.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:37
In New Zealand, in order to teach history in a creative and memorable way, the Nanny State draws a picture on the pavement with magic chalk, and we step into it.
That’s mighty caucasian of you.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:39
their mother dressed up Kristia and Jon in historical period costumes, and had them act out the historical events as she narrated the tale.
Examples include “The Rape of Lucretia,” “The Rape if the Sabine Women” and “The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire (with an emphasis on Rape).”
well acquainted with the velvet glove said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:40
a) corporations are inherently conservative by their very nature, and
As is the Democratic party, as it turns out.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:41
At least one other person on this blog doesn’t have Battered Progressive Syndrome.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:42
Vote for my shitty eighth-party candidates and thus get Republicans elected! Otherwise someone in power might restrict abortion access!
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:43
Buzz off.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:45
Come out in the open and debate me instead of engaging in cowardly nym-jacking, cobag.
octopod said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:46
Hey Progressive Voice, are you suggesting that this would have turned out better under McCain?
What we need is a new goddamn Constitution, folks. We’ve rules-lawyered this one into uselessness.
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:47
Stupak amendment
Democratic – 64 yes, 194 no
Republican – 176 yes, 1 present
Everybody vote Republican, the party that supports abortion rights!
The Kid from Kounty Meath said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:47
“Progressive Voice” is your real name? Are you one of Jason Lee’s kids?
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:48
I’m saying it would have made zero difference, octopod. The Democrats and Republicans are the right wing and far-right wing, respectively, of the Property Party.
We need to send a message that the Democrats need to move further to the left, and maybe after they lose a few times due to third party leftist candidates they’ll learn their lesson.
I mean, Jesus, even the wingnuts understand this. They’re effectively pushing the Republican Party to the right (witness NY-23).
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:48
It’s time to duel!
Progressive Alzheimer's said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:48
When looking for serious debate, I always head for wherever the snark and sniggering are loudest — because I am Wile E. Coyote, SUPER GENIUS!
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:49
I’d rather have thirty Democratic Senators that are to the left of Bernie Sanders than sixty Harry Reids.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:49
Examples include “The Rape of Lucretia,” “The Rape if the Sabine Women” and “The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire (with an emphasis on Rape).”
The re-enactment of The Rape of the Lock was less successful, as the hair-costume tended to chafe.
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:51
We need to emulate the wingnuts’ strategy! Because we all saw how well it’s been working for them!
St. Kid from Kounty Meath said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:51
I’d rather have a full bottle in front of me than listen to Purity Troll jerk off into his sweat sock, take a deep inhale and call it “serious debate”.
Battered Progressive said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:51
Come on guys, be patient. Someday the Democratic Party will love us–we just have to vote for them more. Give them more money. Support them. ONE day we will be loved–its usually our fault, anyway.
W.C. Fields said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:51
I’d rather have thirty Democratic Senators that are to the left of Bernie Sanders than sixty Harry Reids.
I’d rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42.
The REAL Battered Progressive said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:52
Come out in the open and debate me instead of engaging in cowardly nym-jacking, cobag.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:53
sixty Harry Reids
I had those once, but I got oneathem Brazilian waxing things I saw on a teevee infomercial and it cleared right up.
The Black Knight said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:54
It’s just a flesh wound!
James Carville said,
November 11, 2009 at 2:57
Jus’ retahn it when you’re done usin’ it, Pere.
jimmy said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:01
can you guys make fun of this please?: http://www.renewamerica.com/cartoon/dale/091104
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:02
Of course, some ladies prefer Nads.
But, then again, whadoIknow.
The Kid from Kounty Meath said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:08
I dunno if that dumbshit cartoon only had Obama smoking to make him look like Don Draper, but either way it mystifies me how the wingnuts have decided to go after him for smoking, while not pausing for a second in their insistence that only a commufascist would want to regulate the tobacco industry, and that any proof that smoking is detrimental to your health is just “junk science” (which is apparently defined by wingnuts as “science that might result in CEOs making less”).
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:08
“Of course, some ladies prefer Nads. “
The Teabaggers are especially fond of it, I hear.
stackozone said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:08
Fixxed-it
As opposed to the last 8 years, when the GOP platform of reducing taxes, reduce more taxes, repeal regulation and oversight, and repeal taxes, went on to make the US economy the greatest rainbow majick ponie in the 7 universes.
the new nathan detroit said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:09
well it does make a kind of sense for a progressive voice in the desert to wander here in order to better proselytize the meaty part of the curve. the writers at s,n (gavin in particular, natch) are top notch but most of the regular commenters are pretty run of the mill (no no, not you. you’re a special unique snowflake of unique uniqueness…i’m talking about the others. why you’ve said the same thing about them yourself, from time to time.). i mean there are already nuanced debates taking place in some places–why not minister also to the prostitutes and the money changers, ya know?
Progressive Voice said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:10
I’m more popular than Jesus!
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:11
Oh, hey, what a coincidence this Progressive Troll sounds a whole lot like those other trolls!
Victor Erice said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:15
I showed up coz somebody just called “troll! troll! troll!” and it’s about to get all Spirit of the Beehivey all up in here, y’all.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:16
. i mean there are already nuanced debates taking place in some places–why not minister also to the prostitutes and the money changers, ya know?
If he is unsatisfied with our snark, I suggest he wrap the unused portion carefully in tissue paper and return it to us for a full refund.
Or he could sit & rotate – that works, too.
qb said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:26
Well, at least this troll has an intriguing new flavor to it. I mean, Gary Ruppert is delicious and satisfying and all, but occasionally one wants to cleanse the palate with the taste of an exotic species of troll. Otherwise, internet ennui is liable to set in, and you know what that means; actually getting some work done.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:31
Well, at least this troll has an intriguing new flavor to it.
Nah, it’s just tw00fie in “Purity Troll” mode- nothing new under the sun.
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:33
“occasionally one wants to cleanse the palate with the taste of an exotic species of troll”
That’s swell and all and I understand the urge but really, this is just a recycled purity troll and thus…
thuss…
zzzzZZZZZzzz.
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:34
We hates the BBBB, precious! Yes we does! He’s tricksy and types too fast.
Biggo Baldins said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:36
Pity didn’t stay my hand this time.
In other words, “‘Scuze mah fin-GAHS!”
Jennifer said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:37
That argument looks kind of fucking dumb now, doesn’t it? You know, given the fact the Democrats just passed major restrictions on abortion rights.
What looks really fucking dumb is some troll blathering on about how the Democrats “passed major restrictions on abortion rights” in a bill that isn’t even halfway towards becoming a law. “Passing” when it comes to legislating means it became the law. Perhaps it flew right over your head, Shecky, that the Senate is making clear that they won’t accept the Stupak amendment. So who am I supposed to find more credible, the men and women who will, you know, actually be voting on the final bill, or some dipshit who shows up here under a stupid handle and spends hours screeching about how the sky is falling?
qb said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:38
I bow to your superior tastes.
a christian girl's problems said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:47
you shouldn’t take it so personally when someone shows up and wants to play. the occasional slap can bring that lost luster back to your pallid cheeks.
Nicely Nicely said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:49
Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down you’re rocking the boat.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 3:51
the occasional slap can bring that lost luster back to your pallid cheeks.
eeeewww ewwwww
TMI TMI
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:01
As far as I can recall, our choices weren’t between John McCain & Sarah Palin, Barack Obama & Joe Biden, and OUR TRUE LEFTIST REVOLUTIONARY FUTURE.
Our choices in this world, the real world, the one which exists, as opposed to the one comprised entirely of people talking about their consciences, were between letting the Palintide completely destroy everything or let some moderately sane representatives of the business classes run things.
I’m certainly happier that we chose the latter; I’m sad that I wasn’t on the ballot box to be elected Master of the Universe and Instant Winner of Every Big Lottery EVAR, but, you know, that’s because I live in the actual world, instead of the one made up of atoms of attitude.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:10
atoms of attitude
Quarks of Querulousness
Slavoj Žižek said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:11
I support Obama and think he’s doing a great job. Back to the gulag for you progressive purity troll.
beekeeper seeks ruth said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:11
shorter el cid-erino (if you’re not into that whole brevity thing):
i find it so amazing how….i go where i’m led, i go where i’m led. i go where i’m led. i go where i’m led.
(I suspect we could be losing out. please guard my bed. please guard my bed.)
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:13
My Mom was wunna them preverts what pernounced “Mary,” “marry”, and “merry” three differnt ways, but apparently it ain’t heredimatary-like.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:17
Oh, and Troofie…I’m sure you would prefer 30 Democratic Senators to the left of Bernie Sanders to 60 Harry Reids. Unfortunately for you, before you Tax Revolt™ assholes destroyed the “education industry”, it taught a few of us which number is larger.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:18
#
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:48 (kill)
The “education industry” has failed?
Note that what’s-her-face has a master’s degree, so yeah.
#
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 1:48 (kill)
The “education industry” has failed?
In at least one case, evidently.
ALL. ONE. GUY.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:19
I don’t think I have to agree with everything Obama does to prefer him, still, to the Republican seeders of Reaganite destruction. Our choices aren’t simply between leftist rebellion fantasy, libertard teabagger blargling, and Obama worship. This is a modern society with complex structures of power typically dominated by the uppermost economic classes. Any sort of change favorable to the majority of the population is, by design, difficult to achieve.
Honus said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:19
“Kristia is committed to serving and protecting her country in every way she can, thus ensuring her brother’s memory is honored and remembered.
After college, Kristia worked as a senior financial analyst in the healthcare field for five years until September 2007, when she began graduate school full-time.
In May 2009, Kristia received a Masters in Science degree in “Defense and Strategic Studies” from Missouri State University, which is located in Fairfax, Virginia right outside our nation’s Capitol. During the spring 2009 semester, she had an internship at the Pentagon in the Office of the Secretary of Defense.”
So Kristina, being committed to serving and protecting her country in every way she can, works for an insurance company, and then gets some weird degree from Missouri State University in Fairfax Virginia (?) and goes on the wingnut welfare circuit. Instead of say, enlisting?
the North Star said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:20
kids, you’re so lost, even i can’t bring ya home
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:22
“the occasional slap can bring that lost luster back to your pallid cheeks.”
Interest, newsletter, &c.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:23
So, the troll’s not only dumb, it’s repetitive. Great. Even better. The troops from the Revolutionary Naderite Front, Quitter Division, have assembled in the dark since Nader betrayed every single one of his promises that he was really running to build up the infrastructure of a national Green Party. Like most egoists, it turns out to have all been about him, and not the sort of institution building that people generally older than the 4-11 year range realize must occur in order to push for real change. Or maybe atavistic screams have more of a world-historic revolutionary effect that that idiot Karl Mark envisioned.
That fucking bourgie pussy Karl Marx said that it was urgent that workers use what power they had in the democratically achieved vote to attempt to tame the more dangerous and exploitative powers of the bourgeois state, but then he was some old fag who had never learned the anarchic power of the collage.
1995 (MCMXCV, for you purists) said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:25
“the occasional slap can bring that lost luster back to your pallid cheeks.”
Interest, newsletter, &c.
awesome simpsons reference, dude. newsletter. HA!
Honus said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:26
Hey, what a surprise. Missouri St at Fairfax turns out to be Scaife-funded incubator for republicans seeking to promete midle eastern wars.
http://www.rightweb.irc-online.org/profile/Missouri_State_Universitys_Department_of_Defense_and_Strategic_Studies
Honus said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:28
Ok, you guys know what I meant to spell.
here comes your xix nervous breakdown said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:29
Or maybe atavistic screams have more of a world-historic revolutionary effect that [sic] that idiot Karl Mark envisioned.
ahh yes. karl mark. solid guy. played intramural ultimate frisbee with him. great hair. red sox fan, though. :(
but anyway, what are allusions to marx in 2009 if not “atavistic screams”? silly, silly.
Lesley said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:32
I hope these crazies keep manufacturing crazy bullshit any moron can see through for as long as it takes for them to lose the next election and the election after that.
It’s not as if they are bothered by losses anyway since their crazy extends to turning every loss into a victory dance.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:35
i know totally omfg like i said total old fag who needs old farts like that who wrote stuff when you can listen to megan mcaddled on the radio box?
islmfaoscist said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:35
Hey, dancing koalas, cool!
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:37
The Republican Party of the neo-Confederate Ghost Shirts Rebellion.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:43
who the hell is cloning Harry Reid?
And why do we even need one of them?
Lesley said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:49
Evidently, this shameless beeotch has no problem exploiting her brother’s death to garner attention:
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
November 11, 2009 at 4:55
I am very concerned!
~
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:04
Via Balloon Juice: In wake of Fort Hood shootings, Marine defends America from Greek Orthodox priests:
Hmmmph. Should have known that the Obama-controlled police would be siding with the terrorists who are sinisteristically disguising themselves as old Greek patriarchs now.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:07
Oops, the priest wasn’t old. But he had a beard and was speaking some sort of mystical code language which wasn’t English, so it was obvious that he was a terrorist.
stryx said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:17
The list of industries which have failed is alarming: textiles, automobile, production, agricultural, energy, healthcare, banking, education
No clothes, no cars, no stagecraft, no food, no heat, no medicine, no money, no schools.
AW FUCK IS IT 1982 AGAIN?
Anthony said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:17
Sure, you can turn your nose up to this misunderstood Floridian patriot. But I myself have found myself in a similar predicament when I decked out a family of Japanese tourists thinking they were North Korean spies. It happens more often then you think.
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:18
…instead of offering help, “Bruce struck the priest on the head with a tire iron.”
spare the rod, spoil the greek
Andrew N.P. said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:19
No clothes, no cars, no stagecraft, no food, no heat, no medicine, no money, no schools.
No phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury?
SomeNYGuy said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:21
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a Greek Orthodox priest who wasn’t wearing a visible crucifix. I guess Mr. Bruce shares the opinion of Antonin Scalia that the cross is a non-denominational symbol, like the Nike swoosh.
Roger Miller said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:23
No clothes, no cars, no stagecraft, no food, no heat, no medicine, no money, no schools.
No phone, no lights, no motorcars, not a single luxury?
No phone, no food, no pets…
I ain’t got no cigarettes.
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:25
and you end up in Bangor, Maine
stibbert said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:26
hey, don’t that Nike swish look kinda like one a them islammunist crescent moons? Think about it.
jim said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:27
Funny how Cavere leaves out the part where companies just outright shipped massive numbers of jobs overseas, & even dismantled the fucking factories themselves & shipped them off to either the Third World or the Maquilladora Econo-Orgy-Zone, once they had enough Deregulation Moonshine under their unborn-iguana-skin belts to pull it off without having to worry about any penalty – I bet that kind of thing can put a real cramp in your industry industry.
That this went on almost exclusively under GOP administrations is a mere political/optical illusion, probably the result of swamp-gas! Who are you going to believe – a lady with a real bonafide DEGREE or your lying brain-cells?!?!?
Yep, if only it weren’t for those corporation-loving Democrats & their endless lust for deregulation!
NEXT UP ON GOLDSTARFISTER: Why do the Democrats hate big-business, free-enterprise & the magic of the open market? They’re strangling the helpless infant that is American business in its solid gold cradle with their anti-commerce fetish with over-regulation!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:31
Funny how Cavere leaves out the part where companies just outright shipped massive numbers of jobs overseas, & even dismantled the fucking factories themselves & shipped them off to either the Third World or the Maquilladora Econo-Orgy-Zone, once they had enough Deregulation Moonshine under their unborn-iguana-skin belts to pull it off without having to worry about any penalty – I bet that kind of thing can put a real cramp in your industry industry.
but but but shut up, that’s why!
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:36
unborn-iguana-skin
it complements my placental collagen mask (used by Jennifer Lopez)
jim said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:38
Sorry about that … here, have a little DIY fun to make up for it.
Brandi said,
November 11, 2009 at 5:57
So, the troll’s not only dumb, it’s repetitive. Great. Even better.
And yet you guys go for it all the same. And then you bitch about the low quality of trolls here. Isn’t there a Santayana quote covers this?
tensor said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:07
healthcare, banking,
Obviously two industrious productive, production industries, which have like totally suffered from ‘way too much government regulation of late.
Are we sure Bruce didn’t strike her in the head with a tire iron? It would explain her “writing” quite nicely.
Illumninati Repton said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:14
I am disappointed that no one has mentioned the latest PENIS news. .
Some scientist just grew a rabbit wang in a petri dish.
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:18
Some scientist just grew a rabbit wang in a petri dish.
Why, they’ll be able to breed like …….
stibbert said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:23
wow, let’s all bring it w/ the Santayana quotes. Also, some quotes from that guy who did peyote w/ Don Juan, that’d be cool.
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:26
the Santayana quotes
Black Magic Woman!!!
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:32
But are George Santayana and Giorgio Santillana two different people or not? I get their quotes mixed up all the time!
Concerned as Fuck said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:35
I am deeply concerned that Democrats have not learned their lessons after two consecutive massive electoral victories. My concern is concerning. I beg you, Democrats, stop doing what you’re doing. Now.
And I’m totally not the usual troll. At all.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:44
I am not comfortable about piling onto Kristia Cavere because
(a) her website leaves the impression that she is screwed up by the the death of her brother in one of Bush’s elective wars, and she is now looking around for ways that the Republican party is not to blame the state of things;* and
(b) she’s as cute as a button.
* It would be nice if people who have apparently acquired a degree in forensic psychology thereby became immune to the errors of cognitive-dissonance reduction, but that’s not the way it works.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:44
And I’m totally not the usual troll. At all.
I don’t know who you are but that hat is FABULOUS.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 11, 2009 at 6:51
First they came for the giant fiendish octopi, and I did not speak out because I was not a giant fiendish octopus;
Then they came for the sporacles, and I did not speak out because I was not a sporacle;
Then they came for the ancient coiled dragons, and I did not speak out because I was not an ancient coiled dragon;
Then they came for the gray elf wizards, and I did not speak out because I was not a gray elf wizard;
Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak out for me.
ckc (not kc) said,
November 11, 2009 at 7:04
cute as a button
stibbert said,
November 11, 2009 at 7:37
don’t be ashamed – the giant fiendish octopi never spoke out for anyone else, so it’s not down to you alone, if you never spoke out for them.
otoh, the sporacles are way pissed, ‘cos you ignored their pleas.
The domain sporacle.com may be for sale by its owner!
steve malkmus said,
November 11, 2009 at 8:14
If my soul has a shape, then it is an ellipse. And this slap is a gift, cause your cheeks have lost their luster..
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 8:46
Veiled penis reference?
Amidoingitrite?
BrianX said,
November 11, 2009 at 9:18
Can I just interrupt to say Smut Clyde’s post way the hell up in the thread may be the very first time I’ve ever seen a clerihew in the wild?
justme said,
November 11, 2009 at 10:07
I thought you used tire irons to separate Greeks.
I guess that’s Greek sailors. Or Catholic priests. You understand my confusion.
At Circus-circus?
Also known as – between the wetsuit and the humorless dildo.
That, I suspect, would be the humorless part.
?? said,
November 11, 2009 at 11:03
Also, apparently stock options as part of executive compensation became widespread in the 50’s according to Donald P. Delves.
pifu said,
November 11, 2009 at 11:07
Eight million years ago, when George W. Bush was elected, the economic was successfuller. Now that Obama has been President for the last 300 million years, America has lost its spirit of innovation that Ronald Reagan gave to Adam Smith 200 billion years ago, and we may never get it back
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 11:15
the very first time I’ve ever seen a clerihew in the wild
Hans Baldung Grien
Woke up feeling mean.
“Shall I draw ponies?
Or zombies and bonies?“
Christopher said,
November 11, 2009 at 12:04
You know what would make me happy?
If anybody who wrote these pieces had to acknowledge that their guys were in charge for quite a while there in the very recent past.
I’m not saying they’d even have to address it in a satisfactory manner. Just acknowledge that, to someone, somewhere, it might be a relevant fact. That’s all.
That’s not so much to ask, is it?
I feel like Oliver Twist asking for more gruel.
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 13:12
Ooooh, purity trolls: http://xkcd.com/661/
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 13:13
Anonymous was Mrs. __B’s computer.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 15:48
she’s as cute as a button.
Ehhh, I mean, de gustibus and stuff, and she has that long horsey face that I actually kinda like (shut up, so I’m a mutant, so what) but she just doesn’t do it for me, much less button-ish and all that.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 15:53
Ooooh, purity trolls: http://xkcd.com/661/
Now Billy needs to make a poster of her with a Hitler mustache and walk the school halls wielding an AR-15 and talking about Trees of Liberty and watering roots with blood.
‘Cause apparently that’s perfectly rational political discourse according to Teh Intrartubes here, as well.
(pardon me, Wingnut Boss-man and Crazy Anti-Health Reform Lady had a “consultation” at work last night. I didn’t hear any of it, but I somehow get the impression they were discussing THE EVIL BLACK USURPER and his nefarious socialistic plot to kill all the old people. Yeesh, just what I need – Wolverines in the pharmacy.)
game shows touch our lives said,
November 11, 2009 at 15:56
I am deeply concerned that Democrats have not learned their lessons after two consecutive massive electoral victories
the democrats can raise money and win elections, in order to raise more money to win more elections, so that more money can be raised and more elections can be won. naturally, pursuing issues like gay rights, significant environmental reforms, significant reforms in the regulation of the financial sector, any health-care package
running dogsblue dogs don’t support–well all these threaten the sacred cycle of raising money and winning elections.but yeah, dissenting points of view are trolling, and all trolls are troofie, and as a last resort point out in serious, self-important, somber tones that this is after all a comedy blog. which is true enough–the main page posts are often intentionally funny, whereas the comments often descend into a riotous circle jerk. last one to finish eats the cracker. ready, steady, go!
there’s probably a simpsons quote that addresses this, or an achewood. stay hip, my friends.
you can't get good riblets in space said,
November 11, 2009 at 15:58
Teh Intrartubes here, as well.
omg rofl internet spelling! hey man did you catch adult swim last night? totally edgy.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:01
The list of industries which have failed is alarming: textiles, automobile, production, agricultural, energy, healthcare, banking, education.
Let’s deconstruct this:
Textiles — have been failing for decades, ever since basically slavery was abolished, because it’s a lot cheaper to pay a Messican (and even they have an illegal immigration problem from Guatamelans taking those jobs over, which is forcing them El Norte) $5 a day than it is to pay an American even sub-minimum wage.
And that’s before you consider how much cheaper everything else, from transportation to raw materials, is in Mexico.
Automobiles — It’s not the governments fault that for twenty years the US auto industry has sat on its ass pumping out the same shitty designs using the same shitty materials and charging an arm and a leg for them. Toyota and Honda BOTH make cars here in the US in union factories, so you can’t blame the unions.
Oh. Wait. You CAN blame the government! The Republicans have consistently sided with the auto industry intiatives to sell bigger more profitable cars by offering tax credits for buying, say, a Hummer.
A tax credit of $100,000, essentially making the Hummer cost nothing.
Agricultural — Here, I’m afraid, she has a point: the government farm subsidies have allowed corporate farmers to become bloated and complacent and to not utilize their resources efficiently. When it’s cheaper to import straberries from Chile than grow them in California, there’s a real problem.
Energy — Dick Cheney. Nuff said.
Healthcare — Isn’t this precisely the debate we’re having now? When under our current system it’s cheaper to fly me over to Mumbai for open heart surgery than for me to go down the street to arguably the best teaching hospital in the world (Columbia Presbyterian), then the current insurance system is wacked. Period.
Banking — Well, SOMEone had to take the fall for lending to GM, Conagra, JP Stevens, et al!
Education — Excuse me, there’s an industry????
If you’re blaming the school system, how about looking at the culture as a whole, where we don’t value education except when it fails us. We deny science in favor of a promise by some nebulous being who says we can live forever after we’re dead (which is iffy at best), we tell mathematicians they’re fuzzy, and poetry and writing is a dying art, as evidenced by the death of newspapers and magazines that don’t feature Paris Hilton or Carrie Prejean on their cover.
Who the fuck is this nimrod????
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:04
The rationale at the time was that the outrageous salaries people were awarding themselves and their buddies were not related to job performance at all, while stock options were totally performance-based because the worth of the stock depends on how the company’s actually doing
And there was a failure from inception in that logic as well. This scheme rewarded immediate and increasing quarterly profits as opposed to the long-term health of the company. The stock options should have come with at least a ten year lock-up, and perhaps should not have been vested until the recipient retired from the company, thus creating an incentive for loyalty and stopping the bungie-cord executive management style.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:07
dissenting points of view are trolling, and all trolls are troofie, and as a last resort point out in serious, self-important, somber tones that this is after all a comedy blog
awwwww, I think we bwoke his lil’ heart.
No, “dissent” does not make you a troll. Coming on to a comments thread where you then proceed to work yourself into a fine froth about X Big Issue Of The Day and why we are not all talking about it in properly “somber tones”, well, that’s different.
And no, this is a comedy blog. Or at least a snark blog, which is kind of like comedy but darker. But as Emma Goldman said, “If I can’t snark I don’t want to be part of your revolution”. Or something like that.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:10
omg rofl internet spelling! hey man did you catch adult swim last night? totally edgy.
Tut, tut, my good man! Might I offer you my great pink gluteal surfaces to bite?
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:10
No, “game shows touch our lives,” dissenting views aren’t trolling. Assholery of your type is trolling. We’re not politically aware enough for you? Then go elsewhere where you and the other people who see everything we miss can sit around and discuss the utopia you’ll build once you convince everyone else that you’re right.
Speaking only for myself, I believe the regular commenters come here for mostly for laughs. We occasionally have arguments among ourselves because we disagree. I apologize that we don’t spend ever day in sackcloth because of the state of political affairs; I apologize that our humor doesn’t meet your standards; I apologize that we repeat jokes; I apologize that you haven’t been treated with the respect – no, grovelling respect – that your astute observations have earned you.
You fucking tool. Why don’t you kill yourself and simultaneously make the world a better place and end your horrible disappointment with a bunch of people you don’t know and obviously have no interest in knowing?
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:11
Who left their humorless dildo lying around?
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:11
Pere –
While I was typing away you both beat me to the punch and said it better than me. DAMN YOU TO HELL.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:15
When I’m looking for somber political discussions in an in-joke-free environment, I head to the House of Substance.
that time on the ledge said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:18
And no, this is a comedy blog. Or at least a snark blog, which is kind of like comedy
but darkervery rarely amusing.fixed it for you. or rather, as previously noted, the comments are rarely intentionally amusing. the front page often is.
But as Emma Goldman said, “If I can’t snark I don’t want to be part of your revolution”. Or something like that.
ooh. irreverent. HEY LOOK EVERYONE SOMEONE CALLING HIMSELF “PERE UBU” IS BEING IRREVERENT ON THE INTERNET!!!
Makhno said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:22
I really don’t think Purity Troll is Troofie. Even Soft Centred Growl probably isn’t. The thing I’ve always noticed about Troofie’s sockpuppets is that they all sound exactly like the original. He’s much too dumb to even attempt a different voice. So when we do hear different voices, the chances are we’ve got different trolls.
ca plane pour moi said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:23
You fucking tool. Why don’t you kill yourself and simultaneously make the world a better place and end your horrible disappointment with a bunch of people you don’t know and obviously have no interest in knowing?
the noise of your stamping feet. the sight of you shaking your tiny fist in the general direction of heaven. the flecks of spittle on your lips. your rubicund face as you yell and whine and mark your territory in tangy urine. all these belie your affectations of glib indifference.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:24
as previously noted, the comments are rarely intentionally amusing
Hey, nobody’s forcing you to read the comments, Charley.
There’s the door – don’t let it hit you in the ass on the way out.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:24
I really don’t think Purity Troll is Troofie.
I concur. We met this jackass a couple of weeks ago, didn’t we? And we directed him to a totally unfunny blog, like AmericaBlog or Eschaton, right?
and what IS the deal with grape nuts. i mean no grapes, no nuts! said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:27
Who left their humorless dildo lying around?
so many humorless dildos lying around here one more would hardly make a difference. YA BURNT
or did you mean “humorless dodo”. because there are plenty of those, too. DOUBLE BURN.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:29
the noise of your stamping feet. the sight of you shaking your tiny fist in the general direction of heaven. the flecks of spittle on your lips. your rubicund face as you yell and whine and mark your territory in tangy urine. all these belie your affectations of glib indifference.
You don’t know me and you’re a liar. Show me where I posted “glib indifference.” I come here to be amused and you are not only not amusing, you’re intentionally insulting to almost everyone here for no reason at all. It won’t convince us of anything, but of course you don’t care because we’re not worthy of your opinions, right?
If I needed any more evidence that you’re nothing more than a troll composed of used asswipe, it’s the fact that you’re nym-switching every post so that we can’t even use killfile on you. You won’t be ignored!
Congrats, little man, you win. I will ignore you, so you can run the table with your so-clever come-back.
it's a rainy day sunshine girl said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:29
And we directed him to a totally unfunny blog,
you mean http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com ?
oh man. you walked right into that one!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:29
And we directed him to a totally unfunny blog, like AmericaBlog or Eschaton, right?
Personally I’d recommend he go hang out with the Spartacists or someone like that. I’m sure they’re not only serious enough and politically pure enough, but I’m equally sure their commenters are much more insightful and never make silly offensive pop culture references. And there’s a total lack of Photoshops involving toilets.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:32
There’s the door – don’t let it hit you in the ass on the way out.
ROFLMAO! PMSL!
Oh, Pere, that was the most intentionally funny thing I’ve read….ever!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:32
Hey, sunshine?
I’m not trying to be funny there, so no offense taken and thanks for blogwhoring for me!
Have a nice day!
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:33
Oh, Pere, that was the most intentionally funny thing I’ve read….ever!
You’ve obviously never read Stan Lee’s letter section circa 1968.
Nuff said.
pajama party in a haunted hivemind said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:33
nt
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:33
There’s the door – don’t let it hit you in the ass on the way out.
There really is a disconnect on the part of some of the trolls. This place (to me, anyway) is like a local bar. There are regulars, semi-regulars, and a bunch of people that drop in from time to time to add their two cents to the ongoing conversations. The proprietors keep folks (usually) well-fed on consumable material and everyone comes and goes as they please. Like a bar, however, when someone comes in and starts annoying the staff or hassling the regulars, they are shunned or asked to leave or simply told to shut up.
What’s so hard to understand about this? I mean, huh?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:33
I’m equally sure their commenters are much more insightful and never make silly offensive pop culture references
My eyes glazed over just thinking about that possibility…
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:34
You’ve obviously never read Stan Lee’s letter section circa 1968.
Nuff said.
Hey now, I’m older than you!
Excelsior!
he's a whore said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:35
I’m not trying to be funny there, so no offense taken and thanks for blogwhoring for me!
anytime, homeskillet.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:35
And Peak Freans are a very serious cookie.
Also.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:36
There are regulars, semi-regulars, and a bunch of people who need more roughage.
Ah POOP! Where have you been for the last hour?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:36
he’s a whore said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:35
Yea, but I gave your mom a discount.
And it’s “Dad” to you, son.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:38
SERIOUS TOPIC OF THE DAY
Who flagged down the short bus and let this helmet-head off?
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:39
There are regulars, semi-regulars, and a bunch of people who need more roughage.
Veiled bondage reference. (or not?)
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:41
I can’t imagine why anyone would think a commenter whose only raison d’etre is to type cooler-than-thou ad hominem is a troll.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:41
There are regulars, semi-regulars, and a bunch of people who need more roughage.
Veiled bondage reference. (or not?)
Bondage goes too far
Ropes composed of fibrous shit
The Gimp is messy
my pal foot foot said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:41
There really is a disconnect on the part of some of the trolls. This place (to me, anyway) is like a local bar. There are regulars, semi-regulars, and a bunch of people that drop in from time to time to add their two cents to the ongoing conversations. The proprietors keep folks (usually) well-fed on consumable material and everyone comes and goes as they please. Like a bar, however, when someone comes in and starts annoying the staff or hassling the regulars, they are shunned or asked to leave or simply told to shut up.
to me, it’s more like that old fable about the grasshopper and the giant isopod. and the isopod harvested kelp all summer to stock up for the winter, but the grasshopper spent all his time playing video games and watching rockford files reruns. then, when winter came, the isopod was fine because he lived in the ocean anyway so the winter didn’t matter, but the grasshopper got caught by a 5th grader in a gifted science class and then dissected. then someone quoted that hilarious thing grampa simpson said once, and a few other people said really edgy things about religion.
cowboys are often secretly fond of each other said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:43
Yea, but I gave your mom a discount.
i always thought you were gay. just like dad.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:44
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:41
Aw fuck, we’re not going all haiku-y are we? I thought that was ceremoniously dumped when Sam Seder stopped blogging…
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:44
#
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 13:13 (kill)
Anonymous was Mrs. __B’s computer.
I am puzzled as to why she would name her computer Anonymous.
she's not a girl who misses much said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:45
I can’t imagine why anyone would think a commenter whose only raison d’etre is to type cooler-than-thou ad hominem is a troll.
fair enough. the real question is why people keep diving off the bridge despite the distinct odor of billy goats.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:45
i always thought you were gay. just like dad.
Luke, I am your father.
Gee, way to stay on topic, topic troll! You’re a very unserious and shrill commenter. You tried intentionally to be funny and EPIC FAILED your way into the Troll Hall of Fame.
Which is really just a stall in the men’s room at Minneapolis International Airport, but I digress.
oh bondage! said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:46
up yours!
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:47
Aw fuck, we’re not going all haiku-y are we? I thought that was ceremoniously dumped when Sam Seder stopped blogging…
I lack the limerick gene.
Anonymous was Mrs. __B’s computer.
I am puzzled as to why she would name her computer Anonymous.
You should hear what she calls the oven.
zen arcade said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:47
Which is really just a stall in the men’s room at Minneapolis International Airport, but I digress.
if you tap on the right stall in the aeroport in minneapolis bob mould appears.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:49
to me, it’s more like that old fable about the grasshopper and the giant isopod….
It has it some writing skills. People skills, not so much.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:50
Journey sucks.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:50
if you tap on the right stall in the aeroport in minneapolis bob mould appears.
Your personal hygiene is not at issue here. We know you rot.
edmund burke said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:54
paul mantarakis is stealing my schtick! he’s so schticky! like a frat boy’s cumsock in the august sun!
Jennifer said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:58
More to the point, more than once yours truly has said some things that other regulars, semi-regulars, and drop-in guests disagreed with (foreskin holocaust? humorless dildos? I’m sure I’m forgetting a few), but because I could actually defend my opinion as being not-totally-unreasonable, some or most of the others here could recognize that I wasn’t just trolling, because they agreed that my stated reasons for advancing my POV, and/or the POV itself, were actually more logical or rational than the reasons advanced by those whom I had upset or disagreed with.
A lack of personal attacks helps in that regard. Also.
So whenever I see someone such as our challenged friend here claiming that we “just don’t get it” because we’re all in imaginary lockstop, or we’re not pure enough, or smart enough, or whatever, I detect an overpowering aroma of bullshit.
And it comes down to what it usually comes down to in the end: some people just need to get the fuck over themselves.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:00
Some people enjoy troll-playing. But you knew that.
Jennifer said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:00
Brandi, where are you?
canticle for leibowitz said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:00
Your personal hygiene is not at issue here. We know you rot.
i dunno, man, i’ve seen you do better work. i have to assume your heart just isn’t in it, and that really hurts my feelings.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:02
OT/ TPM has a great update on that marine what assaulted a greek priest with his rigid tool.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:03
i have to assume your heart just isn’t in it, and that really hurts my feelings.
I can be cruel to be kind, in the right measure.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:03
Some people enjoy troll-playing.
I can only assume this is cosplay with humorless dildos.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:03
Well, I’M not smart enough, or good enough, and people don’t like me….
But hey, zombie!
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:03
Jennifer said,
November 11, 2009 at 16:58
Clearer (and yes, more to the point) than my version of the bar analogy. Good faith disagreements seem pretty rampant here. Alas, at times, bad faith ones do as well.
soda popinski said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:04
Some people enjoy troll-playing. But you knew that.
brandi has already made an appearance, shoehorning in an awkward reference to that fascist closetcase santayana.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:04
that marine what assaulted a greek priest with his rigid tool.
For a second there, I thought the priest’s name was Paul Mantarakis.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:05
I really don’t think Purity Troll is Troofie.
I dunno…. the obsession with actor is kind of a tell, isn’t it?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:05
Clearer (and yes, more to the point) than my version of the bar analogy. Good faith disagreements seem pretty rampant here. Alas, at times, bad faith ones do as well.
I disagree.
breaking news from the internet said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:06
I’m sure I’m forgetting a few), but because I could actually defend my opinion as being not-totally-unreasonable, some or most of the others here could recognize that I wasn’t just trolling, because they agreed that my stated reasons for advancing my POV, and/or the POV itself, were actually more logical or rational than the reasons advanced by those whom I had upset or disagreed with.
don’t kid yourself. it’s because you were already an established member of the tribe. the female name didn’t hurt, either.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:06
Say, didn’t our white supremacist troll yesterday mock Gen. Casey for pointing out there might be a backlash against Muslims following the Hasan slaughter last week>
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:06
I dunno…. the obsession with actor is kind of a tell, isn’t it?
You have your mindless shambling hordes of followers, Actor has…his mindless shambling hordes of followers.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:07
the obsession with actor is kind of a tell, isn’t it?
It’s the price of fame. I hear there’s an entire site dedicated to me at TownHall…
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:08
Actor has…his mindless shambling hordes of followers.
In fairness, my fan club gives away a kilo of pot with every renewal.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:09
I disagree.
But you’re a Zombie.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:09
On the positive side, it’s figured out a workaround on the killfile (I mean besides not being an asshole).
So there’s an indication that it is at least capable of learning.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:10
In fairness, my fan club gives away a kilo of pot with every renewal.
Interest, newsletter, enticingly aromatic package….
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:11
Zombies can’t disagree, Looch?
empire of lights said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:11
I dunno…. the obsession with actor is kind of a tell, isn’t it?
not really. actor, xecky, and tigrisimus are usually the most entertaining posters. doctor missus etc is the most likable. sometimes you’re pretty funny, although the zombie stuff sometimes gets out of hand (several regulars have confided this to me, privately, though i have been sworn to secrecy as to which ones). some of the older posters were also good, though many of them have disappeared. so it goes.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:11
you were already an established member of the tribe
Um, people skills.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:13
actor, xecky, and tigrisimus are usually the most entertaining posters
You LIKE me! You REALLY like me!
Andrew N.P. said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:13
So there’s an indication that it is at least capable of learning.
How’s that a good thing? If it keeps learning, eventually it’ll achieve self-awareness. And then, once you guys try to killfile it? Judgment Day.
flux of the pink indians said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:14
On the positive side, it’s figured out a workaround on the killfile (I mean besides not being an asshole).
consider it a philosophical rejection of the notion of personal identity.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:14
Interest, newsletter, enticingly aromatic package….
Send $40 to:
Third Pipe Along
Fourth Stall
Men’s Room
Grand Central Station Lower Level
10017
breakfast with blassie said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:17
You LIKE me! You REALLY like me!
occasionally.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:18
You LIKE me! You REALLY like me!
occasionally.
Gee, then crushing you is going to be like kicking the puppy with the sad eyes that followed me home.
I’d better wear steel shank shoes.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:18
Zombies can’t disagree, Looch?
Well, that raises an interesting question. What do Zombies disagree with among themselves? Branes?/No Branes? Seems kind of binary to me. Just sayin’.
LittlePig said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:22
consider it a philosophical rejection of the notion of personal identity.
More like OCD sufferer exploiting a platform flaw, but YMMV.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:23
What do Zombies disagree with among themselves?
We’re mostly in agreement. Oh, sure, we often debate lurching vs. shambling, and whether a diet of brains is better than one that includes flesh and other organs, but mostly, we find ourselves simply looking to assuage the existential ache of post-existence… by eating branes.
Oh, and there’s the occasional zombie asshole who supported Nader.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:24
One thing for sure is, when I was in Italy, the industry there was power and inspired by democracy, and unpolluted by filthy diseased cocksucking Somalians. The seafood was awesome, also.
Ben Richards said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:25
How come nobody’s talking about Creed on this thread?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:26
What do Zombies disagree with among themselves? Branes?/No Branes?
How about cooked v raw, steamed v braised, blanched v deep fried…I mean, the possibilities are endless!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:27
actor, xecky, and tigrisimus are usually the most entertaining posters
I knew I should have stuffed my codpiece.
(runs backstage, crying)
irma vep said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:29
I knew I should have stuffed my codpiece.
yeah. you i’ve never cared for.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:31
I knew I should have stuffed my codpiece.
You need a haddock.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:32
I knew I should have stuffed my codpiece.
You need a haddock.
I think he has a haddock. He needs a calamel.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:33
Oh, sure, we often debate lurching vs. shambling
PLEASE! Not another “lurching versus shambling” discussion, they can be worse than “Mac versus PC” derails. And besides, certain regulars have secretly complained about the “Zombie thing” getting “out of hand” and have secretly told other people — who are sworn to secrecy– just this. So we better stop this right now.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:33
I like you, Pere Ubu. I’ve always wondered if you took the name from the band or the play.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:34
How about cooked v raw, steamed v braised, blanched v deep fried…I mean, the possibilities are endless!
Some undead asswipes even serve ‘em with brussels sprouts.
They probably like Creed and Styx too. I stay away from that type.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:37
Many other regulars have told ME, in secret off line discussions where we drink mojitos with Diane Lane and Robyn Hitchcock, that the toilet photoshops are offensive.
Oh, and humorless dildos aren’t funny. Other regulars are ALWAYS telling me that. For realz.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:40
I like you, Pere Ubu
I do too, Pere.
The pants command me to.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:40
they can be worse than “Mac versus PC” derails.
And here I was considering making an insightful, witty and insulting comment about System 6. But I will hold off in light of your delicate sensibilities, Looch. I know what a painful subject that is for many. Hell, it CREATED many of the undead.
Jennifer said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:41
(several regulars have confided this to me, privately, though i have been sworn to secrecy as to which ones)
That in itself is a tell. You’re an Eschaton regular, aren’t you?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:41
Some undead asswipes even serve ‘em with brussels sprouts.
If you blanched branes, couldn’t you disguise cauliflower in them and get some much-needed veggies? It might help with the shambling.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:42
Admittedly, Zombie Things do have a tendency to get out of hand though. Hence, zombocalypse.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:43
Not another “lurching versus shambling” discussion, they can be worse than “Mac versus PC” derails.
But there’s nothing to argue about! PCers lurch, Macites shamble.
And Pere – Sam’s dog told me you’re okay.
michael pemulis said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:43
i am good, preternaturally good, at eschaton.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:44
Hell, it CREATED many of the undead.
Mebbe so. It sure as hell wakes them up.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:44
If you blanched branes, couldn’t you disguise cauliflower in them and get some much-needed veggies? It might help with the shambling.
I prefer a stir fry, myself. Broccoli is pretty good with medulla
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:45
It is totally Obama’s fault that in his first few months in office the intelligence agencies and the army didn’t detect the growing threat that Nidal Hasan represented, but it was totally Bill Clinton’s fault that George W. Bush Jr. was in office for 8 months and he and Dick Cheney shut down and/or avoided and dismissed every suggestion of terrorist threats until 9/11/2001 promoted Bush Jr. from a mere President to Commander Guy.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:47
i am good, preternaturally good, at eschaton.
Isn’t that kind of like saying you’re good at kindergarten?
have you heard the one about the disillusioned plastic surgeon? said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:49
he hung himself.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:53
Isn’t that kind of like saying you’re good at kindergarten?
I still EXCEL at napping.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:54
I’ve always wondered if you took the name from the band or the play.
If it’s any clue, MEDRE!
…I keep getting people telling me how much they love Dave Thomas and I keep thinking they’re talking about the Wendy’s guy.
song for cleomenes said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:57
Why is the purity troll naming him/herself after a Mountain Goats song? I know John Darnielle’s a vegan and a Kucinich supporter, but he is definitely not a petty asshole who would troll blogs because he felt they had the wrong tone for his liking. So leave John out of this, mmmkay?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 17:59
Heh. Dan Popp showed up in the last thread to respond to S,N! and it’s readership.
king of the carrot flowers said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:00
actually i like the tone of this blog. i even enjoy the commenters. i just may not enjoy them in the way they’d like to be enjoyed.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:01
Thanks! It’s been a long while since I read the plays, I should do so again.
random obscure indie-rock song said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:05
I see, you’re just fucking with us then, I take it.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:06
i even enjoy the commenters. i just may not enjoy them in the way they’d like to be enjoyed.
So for some bizarre warped reason, you believe that the entire world is provided for your amusement and if it’s not amusing you or informing you or entertaining you properly, you must, MUST, speak out and annoy everyone else?
PROTIP: Ur doin it rong.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:08
Ur doin it rong.
I bet he could use one of your subscriptions.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:13
actually i like the tone of this blog
Sadly uses Auto-Tune.
walpole said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:14
So for some bizarre warped reason, you believe that the entire world is provided for your amusement
Yes.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:15
So for some bizarre warped reason, you believe that the entire world is provided for your amusement
It ISN’T?
Crap. What am I going to do with all this popcorn?
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:19
Crap. What am I going to do with all this popcorn?
You and Smut should get together. You could make Varnish Popcorn Balls and sell them at the next Teabagger Gathering.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:21
When my beer nuts turn to popcorn balls, I’m coming home to you.
wapsie said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:22
the squiggly under the C is called a cedilla (rhymes with tortilla)
its odd deployment now and then makes a nice facade of linguistic competence
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:25
When my beer nuts turn to popcorn balls
A shot of penicillin will clear that right up.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:25
No, not all trolls are Troofy. Take you, Goober.
Your obsession with this place is friggin bizarre, man.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:27
A shot of peniçillin will clear that right up.
Sorry. For the façade of linguistic competençe
Steerpike said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:28
Trolling Sadly, No! is like trying to defend the cinematic quality of a movie by arguing with Tom Servo and Crowe T. Robot.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:28
I should also add that Goober, who demands that this place be more funny, is an AoS acolyte. I’ll submit that without further comment.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:30
The fact is, Killer Shrews is a great movie and is beloved in the Heartland.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:30
For the façade of linguistic competençe
Only a façade? I’m Çhattered.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:32
…and a born-again evangelical. Those types really know the funny.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:36
Only a façade? I’m Çhattered.
Çadly, yes.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:41
and a born-again evangelical. Those types really know the funny.
*snerk*
I am reminded of those lame-ass Christian “humor and common-sense wisdom” books by that lady, whassername. Anyone who’s seen ‘em ‘ll know, Barbara something I think. Lord, I get sick headaches just from contemplating them.
You know the kind of thing, though, “gosh being a parent is JUST SO CRAZY!” and all that. Bleah.
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:46
actor, xecky, and tigrisimus are usually the most entertaining posters.
Um, thanks!
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:53
i even enjoy the
commentersborn again evangelicals. i just may not enjoy them in the way they’d like to be enjoyed.Fecksed.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:53
Goober breaks bread with those types, but I wouldn’t say he himself subscribes to that level of laffs…his schtick is basically LOL it’s funny how dumb you are when you make fun of me. It’s that streak of flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing that I’m sure he loves in ol’ Ace.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:54
Annnd…I’m IT.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:55
Frankly, Xecky, I’m honored to be named alongside you, as faint as the praise may be given the source.
Tig…meh…not so much! :-)
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:56
If anyone is curious what it takes to make Goober laugh, the YouTube vids he made supply some clues. Here’s a hint: Rambling strawmen, ubiquitous butthurt.
how quick bright things come to confusion said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:56
Trolling Sadly, No! is like trying to defend the cinematic quality of a movie by arguing with Tom Servo and Crowe T. Robot.
on good days. some days it’s more like appearing on riff trax. the episode where james lileks guest-hosted. major bummer.
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:58
What’s with the generic posts, anyway? I want me some Brad or Gavin or HTML.
Steerpike said,
November 11, 2009 at 18:59
And what about our daily DASH, dammit!
midnight bicycle mystery said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:00
seriously, goober, scram. your schtick is tired.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:03
I’m miffed that I’m not considered likable. I am too totally likable, my mom tells me so ALL THE TIME.
Tigrismus' Mom said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:04
All the other kids are just jealous of you, Tiggy
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:04
Well, nobody mentioned me – either as likeable or non-likeable.
Hmmph.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:05
What’s with the generic posts, anyway? I want me some Brad or Gavin or HTML.
Generic nothing, that’s BRAND NAME posting; i.e. Seb, the Blogfather.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:05
Aw, Mom, you’re the greatest.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:12
I hope the guys are all ok, and this blog hasn’t been hijacked by some great Colussus: The Forbin Project supercomputer bent on destroying Blogtopia (© Skippy the Bush Kangaroo)
Cuz I emailed an article by Amy Alkon to TinTin and I wanted it posted, dammit!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:12
the episode where james lileks guest-hosted.
I do have to confess – when he’s not flogging the wingnut banner, Lileks can be funny.
I do own “The Gallery Of Regrettable Food”, and I got “Interior Desecrations” from the library, but he started to get too conservative in the latter. I saw his newest one at a library sale a couple weeks back – figured it’ d be best to give it a miss.
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:14
flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing
There’s an app for that.
Nymstradamus (ex-McNoob) said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:14
Well, nobody mentioned me – either as likeable or non-likeable.
I admit I bring nothing to the table.
I’m ok with that
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:15
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:04
Well, nobody mentioned me – either as likeable or non-likeable.
That’s just not true! Why you’re right smack in the middle of that list! Look closely at Tig’s name!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:15
Agreed, Pere. Lileks never got over pooping himself crazy on 9/11 though.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:16
flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing
There’s an app for that.
*nods knowingly*
The iWank.
jim said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:16
Hipster troll is cooler than you are.
Me?
I’m cooler than Keyboard Cat rickrolling the Star Wars Kid – & I’ve got the total absence of a social life to prove it!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:19
I’m cooler than Keyboard Cat rickrolling the Star Wars Kid – & I’ve got the total absence of a social life to prove it!
*GASP*
You’re the Numma Numma Dancer!
pedestrian said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:21
I am reminded of those lame-ass Christian “humor and common-sense wisdom” books by that lady, whassername. Anyone who’s seen ‘em ‘ll know, Barbara something I think.
That could only be Barbara Johson. That woman has had the most hilarious problems. For example, one time her panty hose tore and she dragged a piece for a whole block without even realizing! Ahhhh…. but isn’t God great?
someone must have been telling lileks about josef k said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:21
given a bunch of weed and a time machine, lileks could be pretty funny.
given a mountain of coke and a time machine, pj o’rourke could be pretty funny.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:27
flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing
There’s an app for that.
iFwap
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:36
flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing
There’s an app for that.
Not only that, but there’s a fansite and Heroes f-m s-l themed slashfic to be found as well.
And before you say it Mr. Purity, yes it’s all so five years ago.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:50
Whatever happened to the guy who made those clown videos about Gavin on YouTube? That guy ruled.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:52
The terror attack at Ford Hood has made it clear there can be no middle ground between Islam and the West. One must prevail, or the other. We need to get serious about the Muslim threat.
Of course libs probably popped little stiffies when they heard about the shooting, hoping it would be a member of the TEA party movement, but went flaccid as soon as the said terrorist was Muslim. Then they started making excuses for his terrorist act. Just goes to show who are the violent ones.
Here’s an idea: how about we start treating Muslims in the west exactly who, say, Saudi Arabia and Iran treat non-Muslims? Fair is fair!
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:59
FORT Hood, before you start making fun of a typo rather than talk about the point of my post.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 19:59
Yes! Let’s imitate the tactics of theocratic dictatorships, for….FREEDOM!
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:00
We can start by only allowing non-Muslims to live or even visit New York and Washington, just like Saudi Arabia bans non-Muslims from Mecca and Medina.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:01
It’s Ford hood, not Ford Hood.
Steerpike said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:01
Great idea, WWS–let’s do declare war on Islam. I mean, that’s only about a third of the Earth’s population, and the ruling majority of most of the oil-exporting nations in the world. What could possibly go wrong with a brilliant plan like yours?
Next troll, please.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:01
Will the West Submit?
The deadline is this Friday! We will not accept any late submissions.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:02
Steerpike, Israel is at war with essentailly the whole Muslim world and seems to do just fine.
After all, they’ve already declared war on us. And the whole of the West is about a third of the Earth’s population, too, and contains nearly all developed countries.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:03
Here’s an idea: how about we start treating Muslims in the west exactly who, say, Saudi Arabia and Iran treat non-Muslims?
But what you really want to do is submit, to be probed in every orifice by the throbbing, uncirmcumsized members of faceless, swarthy manbeasts.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:05
Here’s a deal conservatives could make with at least patriotic libs–we allow gays to serve openly in the military if you agree to ban Muslims from serving in the military.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:05
Great idea, WWS–let’s do declare war on Islam.
I’m still wondering why he thought a teabagger would be on a military base.
Is our hypothetical teabagger lost?
Steerpike said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:07
No, I’m agreeing with you, WWS! Let’s declare war on all Muslims right now, and finish the job we’ve already started of garrisoning all of their countries. I think it’s a great idea! I’m assuming you have already enlisted, naturally–when do you report for duty?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:09
I’m not talking about an active, shooting war, I’m talking about treating Muslims in the west as complete second class citizens, the same way non-Muslims are treated as second-class citizens in Muslim lands. Ban them from proselytizing Islam under pain of death, ban construction of new mosques, put current mosques under government survelliance, ban Islamic schools, etc. Make life very painful for them until they leave Europe and America, or give up practicing Islam.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:10
I’m assuming you have already enlisted, naturally–when do you report for duty?
He’s already made it clear that he has to wait for the appeal of DADT.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:10
Yep, that’d be Goober. One of the finest examples of Address my point, libs! you’ll ever see.
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:12
I like how it takes Troofy a few hours to change from one sockpuppet to another. It’s like he keeps putting on his costume backwards or something.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:12
Jeez, what is it, the weather?
We got Dan Poop over on the other thread who’s being Mr. Borey McBoringpants, and some douchenozzle over here who’s being all boring Islamophobic.
Better, or at least more riff-able trolls, bitte!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:14
BTW, speaking of Teh Stupide, did Gun Counter Gomer ever pop off the inevitable “if only people were armed!” w/r/t Fort Hood?
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:18
Glenn Reynolds did.
the decline of the west said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:19
if hassan is executed he will be the first soldier to be executed since 1961. god what a spectacle that will be!
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:23
hoping it would be a member of the TEA party movement
Yeah, us crazy people, thinking that folks who carry assault rifles to political protests and talk openly about “watering the Tree Of Liberty” just might possibly produce a fucking loony who’d open fire on innocent people.
Just like those nice Christians in the anti-abortion campaign and how they’ve been all peaceful and shit all this time.
LanceThruster said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:25
Step 1 – Collect underpants
Step 2 – ???
Step 3 – Profit!
(I think Step #2 may have something to do with the Japanese, and profit can be maximized in Step #3 if surfboards are somehow involved)
romance on short notice was her specialty said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:29
it’s ironic that the conservatives, who pray at the altar of mammon, don’t realize that the notion of nation is passe’, times being what they are (brutal). capital has flown the coop and its new high priests know no national boundaries. it is no accident that goldman sachs execs have taken to giving their sermons in churches lately (see taibbi for discussion). just a matter of time before they stand in scarlet robes and thunder at masses in a church in eastern europe where the altar is made of bones (it’s real) and the hymnals are made of human flesh that we are all, after all, nothing more than creditors and debtors in the hands of an angry godlessness.
the angels want to wear my red shoes said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:31
Step 1 – Collect underpants
Step 2 – ???
Step 3 – Profit!
HILARIOUS! dude that construction is timeless. it never gets old. keep using it forever.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:33
I notice no lib here has a good answer to my question about how come we shouldn’t treat Muslims in the West like non-Muslims are treated in Muslim lands? Hmmmm?
N.C. said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:33
The only thing better than stale catchphrases? People who love to point out all those stale catchphrases and endlessly bitch about the losers who aren’t on the avant-garde of comedy. I LOVE IT. CAN’T GET ENOUGH.
mithridates, he died old said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:34
I’m not talking about an active, shooting war, I’m talking about treating Muslims in the west as complete second class citizens, the same way non-Muslims are treated as second-class citizens in Muslim lands. Ban them from proselytizing Islam under pain of death, ban construction of new mosques, put current mosques under government survelliance, ban Islamic schools, etc. Make life very painful for them until they leave Europe and America, or give up practicing Islam.
hey homeskillet, i totally agree that tolerance is overrated. fuck pluralism, i say. i also say we do the same thing with christians, jews, and anybody else who worships some bizarre moon god formed of impotent rage and vestigial that lingers in the nerves and neurons from too many years in too many deserts. down with monotheism. down with death cults and the mortification of the flesh.
a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:36
The only thing better than stale catchphrases? People who love to point out all those stale catchphrases and endlessly bitch about the losers who aren’t on the avant-garde of comedy. I LOVE IT. CAN’T GET ENOUGH.
so you agree with me that he used a stale catch phrase. notch another one in the “win” column, bay-bee.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:36
I’m not talking about an active, shooting war, I’m talking about treating Muslims in the west as complete second class citizens, the same way non-Muslims are treated as second-class citizens in Muslim lands. Ban them from proselytizing Islam under pain of death, ban construction of new mosques, put current mosques under government survelliance, ban Islamic schools, etc. Make life very painful for them until they leave Europe and America, or give up practicing Islam.
The US is a democratic republic, so such actions would require amending our Constitution. Knock yourself out.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:38
And if the Muzzies wouldn’t like that, well, then they can change their laws about non-Muslims.
a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:39
an active shooting war as opposed to passive shooting wars.
cha ching.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:40
I notice no lib here has a good answer to my question about how come we shouldn’t treat Muslims in the West like non-Muslims are treated in Muslim lands? Hmmmm?
Because we wrote down our principles in big fancy documents using quill pens and calligraphy and damn it, it’s expensive finding a scribe these days who can edit on parchment so we’re stuck with the whole “equality under the law” and “all men are created equal” nonsense whether we like it or not.
a grue ate your mom said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:41
if i see someone praying when i’m waiting to board a plane, like being really obnoxious about it (muslim, christian, jew) i do find myself worried they have a suicide-related agenda.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:42
Tigrismus, the Constitution is NOT a suicide pact.
Having large Muslim minorities living in our country, breeding, is going to bring about a future catastrophe. Ask the Egyptian Christians how it worked out for them.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:42
umm, West Bozo, the argument “He started it!” ceases to be effective after third grade.
Also, bigotry. But I guess we knew that, didn’t we?
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:42
I notice no lib here has a good answer to my question about how come we shouldn’t treat Muslims in the West like non-Muslims are treated in Muslim lands?
I’m sorry, I assumed you’d read it already.
You were perhaps waiting for the movie?
your mom ate a grue said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:42
And if the Muzzies
muzzies? really dude?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:42
Or why don’t you ask the Serbs what having a large Muslim minority leads to? Hmmm?
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:43
And if the Muzzies wouldn’t like that, well, then they can change their laws about non-Muslims.
Because nothing says “Clash of Civilizations” like letting the other guy dictate to you what your principles are.
cop shoot cop said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:43
trolls feed trolls.
and so it goes.
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:43
I’m talking about treating Muslims in the west as complete second class citizens,
In the name of Freedom!! Wolverines!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:44
Having large [&GRANFALLOON] minorities living in our country, breeding, is going to bring about a future catastrophe
Same old song, new lyric. The classics never get old, do they?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:44
The terror attack at Ford Hood has made it clear there can be no middle ground between Islam and the West. One must prevail, or the other. We need to get serious about the Muslim threat.
Let me say this about that…
ALLAHU AKBAR!
That Girl said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:44
I’m not talking about an active, shooting war, I’m talking about treating Muslims in the west as complete second class citizens, the same way non-Muslims are treated as second-class citizens in Muslim lands. Ban them from proselytizing Islam under pain of death, ban construction of new mosques, put current mosques under government survelliance, ban Islamic schools, etc. Make life very painful for them until they leave Europe and America, or give up practicing Islam.
Is this some kind of reverse Godwin in the pike position with a double twist?
fukuyama's the end of history said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:44
huntington totally ripped me off.
clash of the titans was better than anything either of us ever did anyway, though, all things considered.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:45
Goober, shut up already,
BTW, why is he called “Goober”?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:45
your mom ate a grue
d00d – “your mom” jokes? Really? Isn’t that a bit over the line?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:45
We can start by only allowing non-Muslims to live or even visit New York and Washington, just like Saudi Arabia bans non-Muslims from Mecca and Medina.
Gee, that’s weird. I’ve been to both…
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:45
Or why don’t you ask the Serbs what having a large Muslim minority leads to?
Nothing, actually. At least not until foreign investors decided to start carving up Bosnian and Kosovar coal deposits and clear a pipeline route. Then it’s all “Mehmet the Conquer” this and “Ustashia clubbing competition” that and pretty soon Eastern Europe starts looking like it has for most of its history.
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:46
Hmmm……Hmmmm?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:46
So how about it, libs? Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
difficult fourth title said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:47
i think your mom is a bit over the line.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:47
the Constitution is NOT a suicide pact.,
Whew, I forgot that the founders included a “these rules don’t apply whenever you are actively soiling yourself in cowardly snivelling terror” clause.
What, is that like the zeroth Amendment or something?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:47
So how about it, libs? Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
FINALLY!
Troofie wants to enlist!
Willy said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:48
Having large Muslim minorities living in our country, breeding, is going to bring about a future catastrophe.
Oh, lookie, racism AND xenophobia.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:49
Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
So … all your puckering frisson would start being about the negroes, then?
My liege, the wound that bred this meeting here Cannot be cur'd by words; therefore be still said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:49
i’m willing to bet that less of substance and meaning has been said, in more posts, in this thread than ever before. let’s all take a second to give ourselves a nice round of applause.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:50
the Constitution is NOT a suicide pact
On this Veterans’ Day:
So of course WWS wouldn’t die for these principles. They aren’t his principles, after all.
I can easier teach twenty what were good to be done, than to be one of the twenty to follow mine own teaching said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:52
wws has his principles. if you don’t like them, he has others.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:53
Tigrismus, the Constitution is NOT a suicide pact.
It contains a method to alter itself. Like I said, knock yourself out.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:53
So of course WWS wouldn’t die for these principles. They aren’t his principles, after all.
He has principles?
Oh right. All niggers/spicks/towelheads/women/Chinks must die. Forgot.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:53
So how about it, libs? Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
I really, really like how you assume the authority to make such a deal. You da man!
Suit the action to the word, the word to the action said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:54
say what you will about muslims, there is something about a girl wearing kohl that is hot upon hot.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:54
wws has his principles. if you don’t like them, he has others.
Hee.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:54
Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
No deal. How about this compromise: Gays will serve openly, and people who call them “homos” will be banned for being homophobic because that is detrimental to unit cohesion.
And the conservative wailing and gnashing of teeth over this will be gentle music to our ears.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:55
wws has his principles. if you don’t like them, he has others.
Gets them at the iFwap store.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:56
Gays will serve openly, and people who call them “homos” …
… are the gays who are not serving so openly.
tis true that we are in great danger, the greater therefore should our courage be said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:56
So how about it, libs? Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
sounds like a good start. but only if we can also draft pretty little methodist girls into the infantry and have them serve on the front lines in their pretty little sundresses with pretty little bows in their hair. deal?
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:59
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:46
“Homos can serve ….”
Come out! Come out, where ever you are!
N__B said,
November 11, 2009 at 20:59
the iFwap store.
aka American Apparel
Major Kong said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:00
The terror attack at Ford Hood has made it clear there can be no middle ground between Islam and the West. One must prevail, or the other. We need to get serious about the Muslim threat.
That’s what keeps me coming back here. The overblown, bombastic “This is Sparta!!!!!” rhetoric from some of our resident trolls.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:01
but only if we can also draft pretty little methodist girls into the infantry and have them serve on the front lines in their pretty little sundresses with pretty little bows in their hair. deal?
Your pretty little methodist girls wear army boots. Just like your mom.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:04
aka American Apparel
Barely-legal girls with low self esteem and skimpy clothing. They hate themselves just enough to mate with you!
Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy! Buy!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:04
Your pretty little methodist girls wear army boots. Just like your mom.
Interest, newsletter, website, etc…
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:04
The overblown, bombastic “This is Sparta!!!!!” rhetoric from some of our resident trolls.
Which is exactly how I figured out that Fwappy McStinkfinger was a bitter, aging bottom.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:05
Barely-legal girls with low self esteem and skimpy clothing. They hate themselves just enough to mate with you!
Damn! Born three decades too early…
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:05
Homos can serve openly in the military..
And this would entice you enlist (and come out), I assume. Be honest, dear.
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:07
Goober: shut the fuck up.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:11
Goober: shut the fuck up.
See what I mean?
The boys just don’t come around much anymore, do they?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:11
Will the West Submit?
Personally, I’d prefer if we had to beat it into submission and then collar it and degrade it by making it blow all the other hemispheres at the bar.
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:15
I love the way troofie/goober/who cares? elevates Hasan to be the sole representative of all Muslims everywhere.
Because Hasan went crazy and killed a bunch of people, all billion plus Muslims will inevitably do the same thing and therefore must be collectively punished by the world’s policemans, Teh United Stateses of America!!one! Long may it wave!
Logic FAIL, again.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:18
So the trolls are now yelling at each other? Huh.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:18
I love the way troofie/goober/who cares? elevates Hasan to be the sole representative of all Muslims everywhere.
Nevermind that hundreds of millions of Muslims have never even heard of the United States or that a billion Muslims would wish us well.
No no! In their world, all Muslims must die because of one deranged killer.
So what to make of Timothy McVeigh or Eric Rudolph…
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:19
i’m willing to bet that less of substance and meaning has been said, in more posts, in this thread than ever before.
Haven’t been around here for long, have you dear?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:20
Islam is incompatable with the western way of life, full stop.
Look at what is happening in Europe.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:21
Oh, here we go, DADT repeal to be part of the next Defense appropriations bill:
http://www.advocate.com/News/Daily_News/2009/11/11/DADT_Likely_To_Be_Part_of_Defense_Bill/
I didn’t see any quotes in there about Barney Frank agreeing to a “no muslims” compromise in order to get this through! Oh well, maybe next Constitution, right bigots?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:22
Homos can serve openly in the military if we ban Muslims from the military in exchange?
May I presume to answer for most everybody here?
No. How about if everybody of any stripe or persuasion who has served in our military in any capacity kick your ass?
This would include GWB (but he would have to lose interest before actually delivering a blow), but not Dick Cheney.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:22
Is Mr. Fightypants still here?
Cripes, I’d figure’d he’d gotten bored and gone off to wank with his buddies at Gates of Vagina Vienna.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:23
Christianity was incompatible with the western way of life as we all now know it.
Look what happened in Europe.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:24
Gates of
VaginaVienna, that is.Fuck, it’s been a while.
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:24
Look at what is happening in Europe.
Indeed.
http://www.gayeuropa.com/
D.N. Nation said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:25
Troll fight!
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:26
Islam is incompatable with the western way of life, full stop.
I don’t know what your problem is with the Muslim fundamentalists. They hate gays, want to subjugate women, love brutal punishments and they worship the same sky fairy as you. They should blend right in with the 30% of Americans who are already incompatible with the western way of life.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:27
Islam is incompatable with the western way of life, full stop.
Look at what is happening in Europe.
You mean the single largest economy on the planet?
No. Tell me, what is happening?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:27
I don’t know why you libs love Muslim fundamentalists so much. They hate gays, treat women as property, and worship a God. so why do you defend them? hmmm?
Will the West Submit? said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:28
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened, Actor.
Google “America Alone”.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:29
so why do you defend them?
OK, now he’s arguing with imaginary people.
Doods! We broked the trool!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:29
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened, Actor.
Non-sequitor, Troofie. Mark Steyn is to enlightenment as Torquemada is to compassion.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:30
Every Muslim on the fucking planet = “Muslim fundamentalists”
Tolerance for other belief systems = “love so much”.
Pointing out the idiocy of your racist arguments = “defending them”.
Right.
Lurking Canadian said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:32
the Constitution is NOT a suicide pact.
First of all: SEZ WHO? The thing was written on a blank sheet of paper. If they wanted to include an Article that said, “Thif is not a suicide pact”, they bloody well could have. They didn’t. Instead, they included an Article to the effect of “Thif is the supreme law of the land, and if you don’t like it, MOVE”. The Constitution is the United States of America. Why do you hate America?
Second of all: suicide pact? Can you do basic arithmetic? Let us assume you can. Go and read sometime about Bomber Command’s joint strategic bombing campaign against Germany during 1942-1945. You will find that they did to Germany the rough equivalent of one 9/11 every two weeks for four years. To this day, historians are divided about whether or not this offensive had any effect on the war, with the most positive analyses suggesting that it probably made it marginally easier for the Red Army to flatten Berlin, and maybe shortened the war by a few months or so.
The massed “muzzie” hordes that cause you to wet your pants so frequently have managed one 9/11 scale catastrophe in nine years (well, actually, in ever). Why do you think (bigger, richer) America is weaker than Nazi Germany? Perhaps you think Americans, unlike Germans, are cowards who are unwilling to put up a fight? Perhaps you are a coward who is unwilling to put up a fight?
Again, why do you hate America?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:32
nah, we hate ALL fundamentalists. we just hate Christian fundamentalists more.
because they’ve done more damage to our country, you know.
we do, however, defend all of their rights to be crazy sky-fairy bottoms as much as they want in this country, as long as they do it quietly and don’t scare the horses.
To be specific, nobody has yet demonstrated that Hasan is a fundamentalist of any stripe. Of course, Fox has said that he is, but that’s kinda the same as Troofy making an election prediction.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:33
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened, Actor.
Yes, why don’t we ever read Mark Steyn around here? Hmmmm?
Looch said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:34
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened
Being a stupid, self-loathing, closeted moron is no way to go through life, son.
cyntax said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:47
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened
Enlightened about what exactly? Other than, of course, that Steyn is a complete barking idiot.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:51
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened
*snerk*
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:56
In a last-ditch attempt to escape the thorough spanking he was receiving, the troll throws a lifesize Mark Steyn doll at his foes and bravely runs away.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 21:56
Read some Mark Steyn and get enlightened
*snerk*
I had the same reaction. I wondered if this was more or less sillier than listening to Elmo lecture on interplanetary gas.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:02
There are many fine Canadians like Robbie Robertson, Leonard Cohen, and Neil Young, who have produced fresh, enlightening commentary about the U.S. in song form. Then there are the Mark Steyns and Adam Yoshidas, who are an embarrassment to both countries and should really shut the hell up.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:02
I agree with the previous common sense poster. Muslims should not be allowed to serve in the military, the same way that homos are not allowed to serve.
The only so-called “acts of valor” that Muslim soldiers have committed is opening fire on their own comrades. This is just one of many incidents involving Muslim soldiers committing acts of treason. Remember a few years ago the Muslim soldier in Iraq who threw a grenade into the tent of his fellow soldiers?
If they adhere to a religion that calls for the murder or forced conversion of “unbelievers” then they shouldn’t be allowed in our country never mind our armed forces!
And just in case you accuse me of being a spineless “chickenhawk” I’m a pfc in the Army National Guard. My company will be deploying to Afghanistan in a year.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:04
What do those two clauses have to do with each other?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:05
The only so-called “acts of valor” that Muslim soldiers have committed is opening fire on their own comrades.
So the people who killed Pat Tillman are Muslims?
And you say this on Veterans Day….shame on you, soldier.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:05
If they adhere to a religion that calls for the murder or forced conversion of “unbelievers” then they shouldn’t be allowed in our country never mind our armed forces!
Says the guy who would like to see a policy of murdering or forced conversion of those who believe differently than he does.
cyntax said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:05
How come the trolls never bring up people like Daniel Larison? Do they have some innate aversion to conservatives who actually know how to craft arguments? Not wingnutty enough for them?
That Girl said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:09
I was going to say something about Troofie’s consistency issues (one Muslim shoots people, all Muslims are bad; one Christian shoots/blows people up, eh, he was just a lone radical), but then I read the Mark Steyn comment and was rendered completely unable to function for a good minute because I was laughing so hard.
He can’t be serious and, yet, I think he is.
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:11
If they adhere to a religion that calls for the murder or forced conversion of “unbelievers” then they shouldn’t be allowed in our country never mind our armed forces!
“Murder of unbelievers”, huh?
Try reading (I believe) 2 Kings sometime.
Wheee! A military of nothing but pagans, Wiccans and atheists.
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:12
“homos are not allowed to serve.”
Who wants to break the bad news to him?
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:14
Paul Malaka said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:02
I’m a pfc in the Army National Guard. My company will be deploying to Afghanistan in a year.
Be sure and share your pork MRE’s with the locals. They love it when you do that.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:16
The only so-called “acts of valor” that Muslim soldiers have committed is opening fire on their own comrades.
Heaven knows, I am no expert on decent behaviour. But I suspect that if I were trying the Parody Troll shtik and found myself typing something as contemptible and easily refuted as that, I would change to some other hobby that involved less self-loathing afterwards.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:18
I would change to some other hobby that involved less self-loathing afterwards
He panicked. It’s Veteran’s Day.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:20
In theory, homos are allowed to serve if they are not open about their sexual orientation. In practice very few actually serve at all. Everyone knows those drama queens would have a hard time hiding their ways. They wouldn’t last two seconds in the barracks. Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either.
Besides, who would want to be in a fox hole next to a queer? Could you expect them to back you up in a firefight? More likely they would duck and scream like the queens they are.
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:21
The English language version of the 11th Article of the Treaty of Tripoli (“Treaty of Peace and Friendship between the United States of America and the Bey and Subjects of Tripoli of Barbary”), ending the fist Barbary war, as unanimously approved by the U.S. Senate:
Buncha long haired America-hating fags.
77south said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:21
“Wheee! A military of nothing but pagans, Wiccans and atheists.”
Crap. I’m going to get drafted.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:22
What are you, 12?
Major Kong said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:22
Tough talk from somebody who has yet to see combat.
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:23
Everyone knows those drama queens would have a hard time hiding their ways. They wouldn’t last two seconds in the barracks. Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either.
Is there anything more flaming than homophobia?
Major Kong said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:23
Buncha long haired America-hating fags.
They wore silk stockings too! And lace!
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:24
Besides, a lot of soldiers realize that you can fuck your fellow male comrades and not be one of them faggots. Especially if you’re giving and not receiving.
cyntax said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:24
Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either.
Besides, who would want to be in a fox hole next to a queer? Could you expect them to back you up in a firefight? More likely they would duck and scream like the queens they are.
Speaking as a combat veteran, you’ve got some learning to do. But here’s hoping your deployment goes well.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:25
That last comment was meant for the pitiful closet case who fantasizes about being in the Army having hot sex with a “screaming queen” in a foxhole.
America's Nemesis said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:26
Do you want to know just HOW sad our little Troober is?
As I’ve said before, I’m pretty certain it’s the same obsessional who used to do this at Eschaton as far back (at least) as 2002 as well… he’d start out claiming to be a Naderite, with an obsession about being “namejacked”, and then as the hours of trolling went by, get angrier and angrier that people weren’t falling for it; and so he’d escalate into swapping to multiple nymns himself from multiple proxied browser windows, trying to just swamp the conversation with them… of course, he’d get confused and post the wrong personality in the wrong window, often giving the game away completely, and so, when he really started to lose control, he’d set up a fake blog to try and take incoming I.P. addresses from it… from which he’d try and trace real life details and call up to vent his fury, also under a false name; “This is Atrios, stop posting at Eschaton, fuck you!” was the call I most remember him making… “fuck you!” was always the final line though, whether people got it at work, or what ever number he’d managed to connect with a stable IP…
The fake blog here by the way, with just one entry made (and made today), under what he thinks is a witty and subtle name that he thinks you’ll assume is a satire of himself, comes from “Romance” and “Angels” above… Monsieur Psychosis eh? Bound to be a satire of Troobus! But wait, there’s no actual satire of Troobus on the blog. And of course, his posting exactly as he started out as “battered progressive”, mocking posters here and their ironic use of memes, under that Angel name 2 minutes later rather gives the game away that it’s him fishing for hits again too.
Yup, we knew him as, amongst other things, America’s Memory then. Whether Truth is the same as Goober, as other’s have stated, who cares? They are both as fucked up and impotent as each other. But I’d bet that the person who made the Sadly No videos is absolutely this current troll, and the one who I gather nearly 8 years down the line, is still doing it at Eschaton too… he had the exact same obsession with trying to satirize the hated liberals in ways that just seem too infantile for words; half a decade later, I still laugh my fucking ass off at the fake Hesiod blog he set up, that spoofed the address and the format, but just consisted of what was literally a ham fisted child’s attempt to draw a human being, in crayons no less. But perhaps, because it had a distended nose, it was supposed to represent lying? Or god knows what was going through that diseased mind at the time? But the first thought any sane person had on seeing it was; “We’re dealing with a seriously fucked up individual here!” And they still thought that after the “this is Hesiod! Stop posting! Fuck you!” calls too…
My my my, what a small world, and what a small sad, SAD little man you are, creepy internet liberal stalker! Not that I’d admit you to ever admit it’s you… you’ve wasted too much of your life for there to be a “you” that you are even aware of any more I expect. But if you just follow the same recipe for hate again, maybe this time it’ll work, and you’ll prove your worth by humbling your liberal demons, eh??
He he he. Fucknozzle!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:27
Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either.
They’d interfere with the group showers.
LD said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:27
Well, it is a reasonable defense mechanism. Usually, the people who are quickest to point fingers do it for the fear, that if they won’t someone will point the finger at them.
It is the group instinct. The easiest way to avoid being prayed upon by group is to make the group prey upon someone else first, and join it.
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:27
I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks
Oh, you’re a top. Got it.
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:29
Frankly, Xecky, I’m honored to be named alongside you, as faint as the praise may be given the source.
Likewise.
But I say tig = teh awesum!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:29
I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks
Oh, you’re a top. Got it.
NOW DROP AND GIMME 69!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:30
But I say tig = teh awesum!
MEGAdildoes!
I mean, Dittoes!
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:30
Oh yes, and all you veterans here, have a good day.
I mean, I hope you do every day, but this one is yours, after all.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:32
“But here’s hoping your deployment goes well.”
Thank you. I appreciate that. I’m in the mountain infantry. It’s gonna be tough, Afghanistan is no cake walk.
Since almost the entire nation of Afghanistan is mountains, I reckon we’re needed there pretty badly.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:33
I’m in the mounting infantry.
FIXED!
Anonymous said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:34
Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either – unless it was John Wayne
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:34
Speaking as a soldier, I wouldn’t tolerate a homo in my barracks, and none of the other soldiers I know would either.
Apparently most soldiers don’t have a problem with it: “A 2006 Zogby International poll of military members found that 26% were in favor of gays and lesbians serving in the military, 37% opposed gays and lesbians serving, and 37% expressed no preference or were unsure. 72% of respondents who had experience with gays or lesbians in their unit said that the presence of gay or lesbian unit members had either no impact or a positive impact on their personal morale, while 67% said as much for overall unit morale. Of those respondents uncertain whether they had served with gay or lesbian personnel, 51% thought that such unit members would have a neutral or positive effect on personal morale, while 48% thought that they would have a negative effect on unit morale. 73% of respondents said that they felt comfortable in the presence of gay and lesbian personnel.” (wikipedia, which links the poll)
You and your little bigot coterie are a minority, and a shrinking one at that.
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:36
Aw, garsh! *toe invisible piece of dust*
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:36
You and your little bigot coterie are a minority, and a shrinking one at that.
Don’t say shrinking!! You’ll trigger him!
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:38
Don’t say shrinking!! You’ll trigger him!
YOU! Get out of my head!
No, really…it hurts!
tigrismus said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:38
Don’t say shrinking!! You’ll trigger him!
How about if I say… MONKEY PUZZLE.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:41
Don’t say shrinking!! You’ll trigger him!
How about if I say… MONKEY PUZZLE.
Whatever you do, DON’T SAY MATTRESS!
Tommmcatt said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:42
Besides, who would want to be in a fox hole next to a queer? Could you expect them to back you up in a firefight? More likely they would duck and scream like the queens they are.
You, Sir should be ashamed of yourself.
It is Veteran’s Day. Have some respect for those who have actually seen combat. A planned deployment is nothing- nothing at all- compared to those who have actually fought, been wounded and died in combat. That you would use your status as a reservist as a beatstick in an online comedy blog, and then proceed to denigrate the service of those who fought and died for this country on the day that we should honor them shows what a pathetic and shallow commitment you have to the ideals and values of this country.
You should not be allowed to serve.
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:42
And what about our daily DASH, dammit!
Young Dash deserves better than to have his photograph appear in the same thread as the troll-player’s current incarnation.
Commander Coriander Salamander said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:46
I don’t buy it. Why would someone join the National Guard if they wanted to “serve their country”? Why wouldn’t they join the real Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or Coast Guard?
g said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:47
Hear hear, Tommmcatt
acrannymint said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:47
I’m sure WWS would be proud of Jasen Bruce – Able to beat up Greek Orthodox priests and still have time to post those beefcake pics
Willy said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:49
Is there anything more flaming than homophobia?
A homophobe set afire?
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:53
I don’t buy it. Why would someone join the National Guard if they wanted to “serve their country”?
In an effort to minimize the cost of the war, which was presumed to be only a few months, “President” Bush called up the Guard for the war, not the regular military.
Which eventually he had to deploy anyway…
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/6585217.stm
SomeNYGuy said,
November 11, 2009 at 22:54
I’m sure WWS would be proud of Jasen Bruce – Able to beat up Greek Orthodox priests and still have time to post those beefcake pics
I don’t know much about art, but I know what I like!
Hey, Jasen — wanna try something Greek and UNorthodox? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrowl!
JM said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:08
Besides, who would want to be in a fox hole next to a queer? Could you expect them to back you up in a firefight? More likely they would duck and scream like the queens they are.
Life isn’t a movie, son. It’s time you learned that.
acrannymint said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:08
Jasen is also apparently your local steroid connection
Pere Ubu said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:10
You know who else wouldn’t tolerate homos in the ranks?
THE GOD-DAMN SPARTANS, THAT’S WHO!
THHIIIIIIIIIISSSSS ISSSSSS SPARTAAAAAA!!111AQ121211“`
WOOT WOOT WOLVERINES
…um, wait, what?
…They WERE?
The whole Sacred Band was?
HUH.
never mind.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:16
There’s no need to debate the bigoted Private First Class. He’ll learn next year when Congress repeals DADT and the world doesn’t end for US forces, just like it didn’t end for Canadian or British troops when they let their gay soliders come out of the closet and serve openly.
As he notes, he doesn’t know any gay soldiers, so it’s easy to make up a bunch of bullshit about how terrible it would be it they served. Then a good Army friend of his will come out, and he’ll either start hating the person or change his beliefs about gays. Most people choose the latter.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:22
As he notes, he doesn’t know any gay soldiers
I’ll bet he does, they just know better than to tell HIM.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:22
oops. Reading full comments, zombies don’t DO that.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:25
I’m in the mountain infantry. It’s gonna be tough, Afghanistan is no cake walk.
The Taliban has a mountain infantry? Hey, just like we do!
Smut Clyde said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:27
More interesting than specious claims from troll about latest fictitious identity:
Recent work on the language role of teh FOXP2 gene.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:29
Afghanistan is no cake walk.
I know the cakewalk. I have done the cakewalk. And I can assure you, the cakewalk is no cakewalk.
Seriously. Damned exhausting dance.
kg said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:29
Looks like the peeps over at TP (heh) have taken posting lessons from TinTin…
http://thinkprogress.org/2009/11/11/graham-censure-climatechange/
acrannymint said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:32
Suggested reading for the Afghanistan bound
OneMan said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:32
Y’all are giving Paulie too much credit. He’s as likely to be in the military as my dog is. And his homophobic comments are so laughably over the top that they must be parody.
acrannymint said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:34
Much as I dislike Graham – I do like this quote:
“Only in America can you make that much money crying,” said Graham, mocking Beck in early October.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:44
He’s as likely to be in the military as my dog is.
Yeah, I thought the same thing, but decided to hold off because of Veteran’s Day, or even Armistice Day. benefit of the doubt, liberal, zombie, you know.
Of course, if he’s a troll, spoofing his service, than he’s a total egregious squeezebag who deserves to have dung beetles forcibly inserted into his nostrils and cnadiru fish introduced into his urethra. Of course, since trolls are, for the most part, subhuman, he is likely to be incapable of recognizing the inherent repulsiveness doing that spoofing on this day, of all….
El Cid said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:51
Ultra-Realistic Modern Warfare Game Features Awaiting Orders, Repairing Trucks
slippy said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:52
I’ve got a better idea: why don’t we just jam our civil liberties down your throat while we’ve got you pinned to the ground helplessly, and you’ll just sit there and fucking DEAL?
Liberals have tried compromising rationally with conservatives for four decades and we’ve been told we’re shrill, unpatriotic, and unAmerican.
So I have a suggestion: drop the “patriotic” shit right now. You are NOT more American than I am.
After that, I have another suggestion: get used to liberals whose idea of compromise is this:
I admit, currently we’ve got too many spineless Dems in the Congress to implement this program wholesale, but the times they are a changin’ and you’re not the future. You’re the past. I suggest you get used to being ignored because the majority of Americans do not give a fuck what you think.
actor212 said,
November 11, 2009 at 23:59
I’ve got a better idea: why don’t we just jam our civil liberties down your throat while we’ve got you pinned to the ground helplessly, and you’ll just sit there and fucking DEAL?
Teabagging!
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:02
As long as SOMETHING gets rammed down SOMEBODY’S throat. An election’s gotta have consequences
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:03
OT, but hey, since On-topic is just troll-bagging at this point, what the fack….
via Shakes, Rod Dreher has noticed that it is the end of the Patriarchy:
http://blog.beliefnet.com/crunchycon/2009/11/god-first-america-second.html
So, you know, drinks are on the ladies tonight!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:04
Also, slippy is today’s Honorary Zombie.
Some view it as an honor.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:06
From Dreher’s article, a piece by Pat Buchanan that he endorses:
Um, I seem to remember a first generation…you might remember? Founding Fathers? “All men are created equal”?
Just a thought.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:06
Also, slippy is today’s Honorary Zombie.
Hey!
HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:13
Actor the trolls already love you.
OneMan said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:13
“HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!”
1) Who died and made the zombie the king? Oh wait…
2) Brane sushi? I’d pass, if I were you.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:16
1) Who died and made the zombie the king?
Everybody else.
Hullo? Zombie????
No-Visible-Means said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:20
He’s as likely to be in the military as my dog is.
If he is spoofing service, then he at least has done his homework.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/10th_Mountain_Division_(United_States)#Recent_deployments
Yeah, I was a skeptic too. Particularly since his Nym is a fictional soldier.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:20
I’ll say one thing about zombies, they’re rigorous.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:25
Since I am king today, i will penalize tigrismus 10 comments for unnecessary punning.
Also, for being popular with the trolls.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:29
500 comments?
I smell a whiff of Zardoz, even for Sadly, No.
Smut Clyde said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:34
1) Who died and made the zombie the king?
In the country of the bland, the brain-dead man is king. Or something like that.
Smut Clyde said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:44
while commerce is floundering
If there is no new post soon then I will resort to fish puns.
Anonymous said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:45
“Is there anything more flaming than homophobia?”
Its funny how you can light up a fag on the streets of London anytime you want and nobody bats an eye, but just try it one time in San Francisco and everybody freaks the fuck out.
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:46
I am anonymous above.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:47
i will penalize tigrismus 10 comments for unnecessary punning.
And I’ve only got 11 left so I’d better not waste… oh crap.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:53
If there is no new post soon then I will resort to fish puns.
Thank Spag this blog uses Auto-Tuna.
OneMan said,
November 12, 2009 at 0:53
“Its funny how you can light up a fag on the streets of London…”
Similarly, you can bring a faggot home and throw it into the fireplace anywhere in Europe and it’s OK but just try that in Seattle.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:16
I don’t think the troll is getting deployed anywhere. I don’t think it’s serving, either. Sure, it may have done some homework, but I would think given the troll character, the announcement of service would have come much, much earlier in the dialogue, if not the first outburst. Trolls want to be respected, what else could be said that would bring such a response (esp. on Veterans’ Day)? The lateness of the declaration of service, when all else fails, says to me the troll is lying.
The Long Dark Night Of The Lepus said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:27
I don’t know why the wingnuts think its their right to wheel and deal and declaim whether muslims or homosexuals are in the army. They’re in, and within a year or two will be publicly accepted. Homosexuals also.
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:44
“If there is no new post soon then I will resort to fish puns.”
Well, you can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish.
I have more and I’m not afraid to use them. Consider yourselves warned.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:51
If somebody uses that halibut pun, I will counter with one built around the word “whale”.
I’m totally not kidding, either.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:54
Tommmcatt is up on his perch.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:56
Don’t get me started. I have roe-d in the water at 3 Bulls. I will not brook disagreement; even if the Trout shows up.
You can see this thread starting to flounder.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 1:57
In addition, nobody had better try to turn this into some kind of cage match. Because I will come at you with some of the worst puns you’ve ever seed, believe me.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:02
I think we need to discus this further, Tommmcattfisssh.
Don’t get crabby though.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:14
via Atrios
Loud Obbs to leave CNN.
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:15
Well, I can see there’s not a whale of a lot going on around here tonight…
*ducks barrage of thrown shoes*
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:15
I’m sorry, ZMR. I’m just a little off because I had to cancel my tickets to a performance by some Benedictine Monks to which I really wanted to attend. They were going to do their traditional performance, yet with a twist- as it was taking place in a dinner theatre, it was going to be based around common light summer main courses.
It was called “Salmon Chanting Evening”. It breaks my heart not to be able to go.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:17
What, now puns are necessary? All the zombies I know are getting brain slugs for Yule.
Djur said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:18
Actually, terribly, she might know what façade means. See, Glenn Beck has been pushing Skousen on the wingnuts, and one of Skousen’s lasting conspiracy theories is that the nominally Republican captains of industry are actually secret commies. This is why Glenn Beck got all tweaked out about fascist/”progressive” imagery at Rockefeller Center.
It’s an important thing to keep in mind when dealing with teabaggers. In their mythology, corporations are left-wing. It’s sort of a distorted, corroded, and disgorged equivalent of the lefty notion of “corporate welfare.”
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:21
O well done. That would be a flaky, yet tender evening.
I presume you were using it to butter somebody up?
It sounds like a great e-ventral. I hope you didn’t pay more than a couple of fins for tickets. I hate spending several gills for a show and then not roe-ing.
Pere Ubu said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:27
the nominally Republican captains of industry are actually secret commies
Christ, Blecch finds the most interesting new ways to display his total batshit insanity.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:27
Great, anybody want to take my bets on Loud Obbs going to Focks?
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:31
Well, it’s not a total fluke. The guy that gave me the tickets thinks he’s Cod’s gift to mankind, and I hate to be beholden to that kind of shark. You know the type, try to hook you with a little gift, then all of a sudden it’s lunch every day, discussing inanities like the office pool, that kind of thing. I learned this in school: give somebody like this an op-perch-tuna-ty to take an inch, and you’ll find out later that it was a mile they shad.
Woodrowfan said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:35
She got her master’s at Missouri State in Fairfax, Virginia? I’m a professor in Northern Virginia and I’ve never heard of that school. I sense a “we don’t fail anyone whose check clears” proprietary university..
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:35
Better than even money, I would say. Either that or they caught him with his hand in the cookie jar. Or in some poor illegal alien call-boy, as it were.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:36
Dobbs 2010!!! Taking Kay Bailey Hutchinson’s seat!!! Run, Lou! Run!!!
N.C. said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:40
It looks like it’s a satellite program of the Missouri State in Springfield, MO, and not really a school of its own.
Pere Ubu said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:43
urging me to go beyond the role here at CNN and to engage in constructive problem solving as well as to contribute positively to the great understanding of the issues of our day
Well, Lou, considering you’re 0 for 0 on both those counts at the moment, maybe a change of scenery is indeed called for.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:45
Missouri State University in Fairfax, Virginia, is totally believable, though. After all, the University of New England is in…wait for it…Armidale, New South Wales.
The Kid from Kounty Meath said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:49
Proposed headline: Dey Took’er Dobbs!!!
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:51
It’s not just me.
Apparently he lives in Jersey now. Neither senate seat, nor the Govenor’s office is up for grabs in 2010. It’s gotta be Kay Bailey Hutchinson – assuming she resigns to run for Govenor.
OR… Dobbs for Govenor of Texas! OMG! DO IT LOU!!!
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 2:58
Dobbs would be a “Club for Growth darling for any number of Scozzafava-able districts.
(God I sure hope “to Scozzafava” doesn’t catch on as a verb. Waaaaay to hard to type, let alone pronounce. Needs to be short and punchy, like “Borking” judicial appointments. No good way to shorten it without sounding smutty.)
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:03
…for any number of Scozzafava-able districts.
There is no way in hell that Dobbs’ ego will settle for anything less than US Senator. Loud Obbs, representative of Jersey’s nth rathole district? (and I mean rathole in the most complimentary way possible) Nuh-uh.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:17
must I say it?
PALIN/DOBBS 2012!!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:18
I will also say, for the benefit of any wingnuts hanging about, that nothing would piss off liberals more.
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:23
I could see him angling for the veep spot on any GOP ticket. Romney-Dobbs?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:41
Steerpike, how is Romney funnier than Palin?
The only thing more amusing would be if he teamed up with Tommy Thompson.
Oh pleasepleasepleaseplease ….
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:41
The angry dumpy white guy vote would be SEWN UP.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:42
As well as the Troofy/Goober vote.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 3:52
Thompson/Dobbs in 2012.
I don’t think I deserve such joy in one lifetime. Almost nobody does.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:14
“Salmon Chanting Evening”.
You’ve been holding that for the right moment. When did you first spawn it?
and he showed him the Milky Way, and the earth here, so little in comparison with the hugeness of the heavens said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:22
steve ballmer/don nelson for prez, avec secretary of state john daly. angry, dull witted, white dude vote sewn up for keeps.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:39
First they came for the advanced chimeras, and I did not speak out because I was not an advanced chimera;
Then they came for the cannibal zombies, and I did not speak out because I was not a cannibal zombie;
Then they came for the living city ravens, and I did not speak out because I was not a living city raven;
Then they came for the rats, and I did not speak out because I was not a rat;
Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak out for me.
N__B said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:44
Really? The roaches were left and I’m sure they’d speak up.
my life with the chill pill kult said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:46
man in the past 5 days my xbox tells me i have spent 67 hours playing dragon age origins and i don’t even like the game. in fact, i hate it. it’s fucking terrible. and yet i just keep playing. what gives? is this what they mean by samsara?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:56
well, I would expect the engineers to speak up for the cannibal zombies.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 4:58
Plus, if Janus Node was outlawed, I would expect nationwide productivity to jump by a percentage point or two, just from allowing Substance to concentrate on something productive.
Snorghagen said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:36
Political office? Nahhh…
Dobbs is just talking about his ongoing battle with high-velocity flatulence.
Snorghagen said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:37
Not to be confused with flatulent-masturbatory self-loathing.
Ben Richards said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:41
Creed is awesome.
N__B said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:43
high-velocity flatulence
Add a wind turbine and you’ve got a whole lot of bean-powered electricity.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:46
Tell me this, liberals: what has your Boy King done for you lately? Socialism isn’t a sure thing. Fags still can’t get married. You still can’t get abortions wholesale. Muslims haven’t taken over yet, and the left has not shut down FOX so the truth still gets out.
People from Somalia smell like ass.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:50
In case you missed it, I am 10th Mountain Division at Ft. Drum and I am going to be deployed. They have mountains over there so it helps. How many of you liberals have served? None of you, I bet. Shut up. On today, of all days, shut up.
Anthony said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:51
we didn’t go to war with Iran, I don’t know what a wholesale abortion is, but I think you can that somewhere. I don’t know where in the left’s secret plans for America was make Somalis smell better but I guess that’s a desirable goal.
Anthony said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:52
It’s funny because you’re too incoherent to be a parody troll, I think…
Arky said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:58
The comments for this post will soon be longer than Dobb’s career.
Seriously, why have our hosts forsaken us? Have they succumbed to Pig Cooties or are they already camped out in front of WalMart so they’ll have first dibs on Failin’ Palin’s new book?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 5:58
Tell me this, liberals: what has your Boy King done for you lately
OK, fist of all, the term Boy-King is your own obsequious authoritarian construct, and nobody here views Obama as anything of the sort. It is more applicable, if at all, to how the rightwing delivered adulation and mindless support to George W Bush, but here in Liberal Land, we don’t play that Great Father game.
But and However, just in this last week:
He has told the senate to step the hell up and pass a health care reform bill.
And he has also told them that the Stupid abortion restrictions are RIGHT OUT.
And he has rejected all the warmongering option presented to him by the Chiefs in regard to Afghanistan, telling them to go the fuck home and try again.
And he’s established the disillusion of DADT.
Not bad, by Zombie Metrics.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:04
How many of you liberals have served?
If you’ve been paying attention, there are actually quit a few veterans hanging out here. Not to mention that the head of the Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America is clearly a progressive.
Not to mention men of conscience like good old mikey, who some may remember.
You discredit your own brothers and sisters in arms by your whines. Stop it. Live up to the standards of your service.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:05
Seriously, why have our hosts forsaken us?
relax, they are not zombies, they have lives.
The Tragically Flip said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:06
You still can’t get abortions wholesale.
I know, and this is an unconscionable violation of WTO rules, letting the wholesale abortions from China pile up on the docks like that, I thought we were past the era of protectionism!
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:06
already camped out in front of WalMart so they’ll have first dibs on Failin’ Palin’s new book
Hey, why bother?
In two weeks you can pick one up out of the dumpster in back.
Paul Mantarakis said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:08
Come on, liberals. Debate me with facts and logic. Oh, I forgot, you don’t have any! Never mind.
Snorghagen said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:11
Our federal constitution guarantees parody trolls the same rights to incoherence that all citizens enjoy.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:14
Our federal constitution guarantees parody trolls the same rights to incoherence that all citizens enjoy.
Fire Trucks!! Lump extreme satisfaction Tuesday octopus rice pilaf! Quince! Big lizard in my backyard, Mojo squandered Kamchatka accordion poopshovel.
Gary Ruppert said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:16
The fact is, why must every right wing voice be silenced by the bias of leftist liberalism? Where is your tolerance for differing views?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:25
Debate me with facts and logic
[Charles M. Bogart] This is the eternal cry of the Lumpy Internet Troll, frustrated by its inability to find a mate of any kind during its short lifespan. It flits from venue to venue, but is usually unable to find a mate, because of its abrasive personality and disgusting personal hygiene. It has no interest in facts or logic, but merely echos these terms that have been learned at more successful internet locations, thinking in a dim-witted fashion that the form is more important than the content.
eventually, it deceases in a drainage ditch, quivering in frustration and repressed sexual longing. Unfortunately, the breed is usually propagated by poorly-endowed individuals of otherwise viable species. [/Charles M. Bogart]
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:27
I tellya, it’s my finest free verse.
Snorghagen said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:28
That’s a complete fucking regurgilation of your usual toasted shrimp socialist bag of burning dog assholes! Goddamn Muslim asparagus-flavored piss-in-a-popsicle. Who’s gonna clean up Obama’s legos when Palin’s tits pop out of the motherfucking cole slaw? Huh?!
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:30
Come on, liberals. Debate me with facts and logic. Oh, I forgot, you don’t have any! Never mind.
Various commenters have already tried the facts and logic route, and it seems you have made a point of ignoring everything they’ve said. So let me be the first to say, go piss up a rope, loser.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:31
Fire Trucks!! Lump extreme satisfaction Tuesday octopus rice pilaf! Quince! Big lizard in my backyard, Mojo squandered Kamchatka accordion poopshovel.
My all-time favorite Syd Barrett lyric!
Standard Troll said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:36
Gratuitous insult! Outrageous hyperbole, dire prediction, humorous (sic) quip. Regurgitated talking point; unfounded assumption; ludicrous prediction!
Rhetorical question?
Indignant demand for response!
El Cid said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:38
Don’t you be bustin’ on quince.++
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:48
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:31
I give you free use to put it in a song, friend.
Substance McGravitas said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:49
JanusNode runs on zombie wetware.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:51
My all-time favorite Syd Barrett lyric!
Actually, i feel honored by the ref, although I know you were goofin.
Smut Clyde said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:51
Big lizard in my backyard
For once I would like to read a thread that does not descend to the level of veiled buttsex references. A clean mind in a healthy body, people.
What for the cake be laid by Snorkum?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:52
JanusNode runs on zombie wetware.
All the tech in the world doesn’t replace chemically-enhanced partially decomposed shambolic host vessels.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 6:58
Actually, i feel honored by the ref, although I know you were goofin.
It’s not that far removed from this, truth be told.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:05
Well, J Neo, i know he’s an englishman, but I though mine had more rhythm.
Snorghagen said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:07
…descend to the level of veiled buttsex references.
Just take the escalator down from the mezzanine.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:11
You still can’t get abortions wholesale.
And speaking as a member of the ghoul-American community, I can only say, how much longer must we pay retail>
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:13
Actually, I imagine your aphasia-licious entry being read out loud in a breathless voice by Allen Ginsburg. That’d be cool.
itwasntme said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:32
Well, apparently Lou Dobbs isn’t enough fresh meat for this thread…
itwasntme said,
November 12, 2009 at 7:38
(the jeering crowd, now silenced, waits in a restless mob for a new target; alcohol and weed do not dull the wit of the shambling untidy mass of underemployed posters; their pockets are full of barbs, ready for the next hapless troll to stumble near enough…)
Jay Are Eff said,
November 12, 2009 at 8:25
“to stumble near enough…)”
DEAR GOD THAT SMILEY ONLY HAS 1 EYE. Why the hell is it smiling? Have you drugged it?
OneMan said,
November 12, 2009 at 8:34
it coulda lost ‘em both. then it would be sad: }[
LD said,
November 12, 2009 at 9:25
Troll source:
REPEAT
{
Talkingpoint()
IF (IGNORED)
{
Address my post, libs !!!
}
else
{
Why must every right wing voice be silenced by the bias of leftist liberalism? Where is your tolerance for differing views?
}
}
Who would have quessed….
Col. Richard Hindrance (Mrs), VC, DSO and Bar, Buffet, Dancing 'til Late said,
November 12, 2009 at 10:41
If Paul Mantarakis is worried about the ghastly consequences of “being in a fox hole next to a queer,” with all the “ducking and screaming,” then he may be interested to see that my Great Island Nation’s very own Royal Navy has experienced similar problems.
Of special interest will be the frank admission at 4:20 of what a threat gay sailors pose to naval discipline.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3icDB3kRKPg
Be warned, toy soldier Mantarakis. It is worrying stuff.
a concerned citizen said,
November 12, 2009 at 10:57
PALIN/DOBBS 2012!!
Screw that. Bob Dobbs/Lou Dobbs 2012. That would be a balanced ticket.
Remember when there were people who thought Kerry/McCain ‘04 would be a good idea? Do you think there’s an alternate universe out there where it actually happened, and are the trolls any better in that one?
Modern day Zen koans.
Major Kong said,
November 12, 2009 at 12:25
In case you missed it, I am 10th Mountain Division at Ft. Drum and I am going to be deployed.
The 10th Mountain Division is an active duty unit. You said you were National Guard.
N__B said,
November 12, 2009 at 13:30
Well, apparently Lou Dobbs isn’t enough fresh meat for this thread…
Lou Dobbs isn’t enough fresh meat to make dinner for two.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:03
The 10th Mountain Division is an active duty unit. You said you were National Guard.
Uh-oh. Trolly McClosetpants done fucked up and got caught.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:04
And, impersonating a soldier on Veteran’s Day to score points. That’s nice.
Major Kong said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:06
Presumably he thought that since we’re all a bunch of hippie liberal peaceniks nobody would know the difference.
owlbear1 said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:12
random prediction of the day:
Hannity’s entire ‘defense’ of the conflation of 11/5 rally video images with those of the 9/12 rally will be the “earlier” label. “There was no dis-honesty since the 9/12 rally was clearly earlier than the 11/5 rally.”
He may go for the “Triple Dicky” and accuse Stewart of being dumb for not knowing this.
NobodySpecial said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:12
Keeping your fake story straight: Priceless.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:18
He couldn’t leave well enough alone, could he? Had to bring it up again, because he caught a whiff of respect from some of the posters and then over-reached to expose the lie.
More competent trolls, please (and new ones. This one has been at it for years and still executes first-year Troll faceplants. He is hopeless.)
Rightwingsnarkle said,
November 12, 2009 at 14:59
…men of conscience like good old mikey, who some may remember.
Alas, poor Mikey. I remember him well. He’d shoot six trolls and you’d never even see his pistol leave its holster.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:30
It was called “Salmon Chanting Evening”. It breaks my heart not to be able to go.
I was there. It was fine when they stuck to canticles and barbels, but when they sang that song from “Sound Of Music” about blessing Der Faderland…you know, “Alewife”?…I had to leave.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:33
Steerpike, how is Romney funnier than Palin?
Two words: under pants.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:35
…I had to leave.
So you just musseled through the audience to the door?
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:37
Socialism isn’t a sure thing. Fags still can’t get married. You still can’t get abortions wholesale. Muslims haven’t taken over yet, and the left has not shut down FOX so the truth still gets out.
Let’s flip this for a second:
Capitalism isn’t a sure thing. Fags still can’t be crucified. You still can get abortions wholesale. Muslims haven’t taken gone away, and the right has not shut down the Democratic party so the truth still gets out.
And that’s after THIRTY YEARS of conservatism.
Loserrrrrrrrrrrrrrrssssssssssssssssssssssss…….
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:37
So you just musseled through the audience to the door?
What the hake! When a man’s gotta go, a man’s gotta go.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:39
Debate me with facts and logic
Why? It’s much funnier mocking you.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:42
When a man’s gotta go, a man’s gotta go.
I hope none of the other patrons felt eel will towards you.
Makhno said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:43
New theory: Troofie IS Mark Steyn. It would explain a lot.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 15:57
I hope none of the other patrons felt eel will towards you.
I squid you not, one fellow carped a little.
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:11
Um…good morning? I think we need to alert the police to swing by the Sadly, No! compound to see if the entire
cultcongregation has succumbed to a natural gas leak or something. None of the members of the reclusive community has been seen since posting a thread mocking a columnist at Renew America over 40 hours ago!tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:14
“to stumble near enough…)”
DEAR GOD THAT SMILEY ONLY HAS 1 EYE. Why the hell is it smiling? Have you drugged it?
Sir, that smiley clearly has 3 eyes.
Why must every right wing voice be silenced by the bias of leftist liberalism?
Wait, are you still posting? Holy fuck, we missed one ALERT THE FEMA CAMP TRUANT OFFICERS.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:18
I squid you not, one fellow carped a little.
Probably best just to skate out of there, then.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:21
Probably best just to skate out of there, then.
I left him to flounder about.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:26
I left him to flounder about.
Well, I hope he wasn’t a wrasse about it.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:29
Well, I hope he wasn’t a wrasse about it.
I think he believed it was just a fluke.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:31
Ye Gods, it smells like day-old fish puns in here. If that fresh.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:32
I think he believed it was just a fluke.
That gives me a ray of hope.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:33
That gives me a ray of hope
Seahorse, be horse, I always say.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:34
Ye Gods, it smells like day-old fish puns in here. If that fresh.
It does have a certain tang, doesn’t it?
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:37
It does have a certain tang, doesn’t it?
Things are getting a bit corrado around here. We need a new thread.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:45
Ye
GCods, it smells like day-old fish puns in here. If that fresh.actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:50
Ye GCods, it smells like day-old fish puns in here. If that fresh.
The grouper with me in saying that was unnecessary.
Willy said,
November 12, 2009 at 16:53
It smelt fishy from my perch.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:02
Not form down the pike, it doesn’t!
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:03
With my nym, I think I’ll give the fish puns a pass, thanks
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:05
Or should I say, a BASS!
Sorry, couldn’t resist. Sometimes I just slay me.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:06
I think I’ll give the fish puns a
passbassFished!
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:06
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:08
Headlines the Catholic Church probably doesn’t want:
Irish priest kidnapped in Philippines released by MILF
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:19
Irish priest kidnapped in Philippines released by MILF
Sarah PalinElizabeth Kucinich is working in the Philippines?77south said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:19
Stop it this instant!
I demand an end to lazy fish punning.
you people are going after low hanging fruit. anyone can make a pun on flounder or tuna.
Aim for the stars people! use some of these fish:
African glass catfish
African lungfish
aholehole
airbreathing catfish
airsac catfish
Alaska blackfish
Albacore
Alewife
Alfonsino
Algae eater
alligatorfish
Amago
American sole
Amur pike
Anchovy
Anemonefish
etc.
list cribbed from wikipedias: List of common fish names.
dinosaur constellation said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:27
i don’t even know why you guys are so eager for another new post. we all know it won’t be a gavin post anyway. probably just another sad little “shorter” that you’ll all slobber all over and try to hump harder than a herd of ten peckered billy goats.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:32
TEN PECKERED BILLY GOATS NEED LOVE, TOO.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:34
No way Lou Dobbs would take the pay cut to go into public service. He’s going to Fox.
Sir Ellis P. Worthington III, Esq. said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:36
12 Banana Cream Pies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:42
Four Calling Birds!!!!!
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:43
TEN PECKERED BILLY GOATS NEED LOVE, TOO.
I’d pay good money to see a billy goat with ten peckers! I’d even pay good money to see a RAM with ten peckers!
Hell, I’d pay good money to see ten peckers IN a goat!
Woodrowfan said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:47
I fought for your freedom, so SHUT UP! /rightietroll
ken starr said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:53
i have just been given subpoena power in the mary peck affair and president wilson would be well advised to lay low for the foreseeable future.
yours in christ,
kenneth starr
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:53
Hell, I’d pay good money to see ten peckers IN a goat!
If that “sad little shorter” comes in here in heat, flouncing its 10 nanny goat vaginas around, what does it expect is going to happen? I’m just sayin’.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 17:54
Y’know, if we all went up to that “Contact” linky-dinky up top and sent an email to all of Sadly,No! contributors, I bet we’d get a new thread, fershure.
i'd be a yellow feathered loon said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:01
Y’know, if we all went up to that “Contact” linky-dinky up top and sent an email to all of Sadly,No! contributors, I bet we’d get a new thread, fershure.
collaborator. sympathizer. tory.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:02
tory.
Check your Spelling.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:03
You go to snark with the thread you have, not the thread you wish you had.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:11
OK. at everyone’s urchin, I’ll stop the fish puns.
and whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense pinafore said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:12
Check your Spelling.
check yours, homeboy. unless you’re insisting the “t” be capped, in which case, let me note, i’ve never seen you make the same insistence with a little letter called “a” in a little word called “america.”
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:15
Check your Spelling.
Aaron’s spawn.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:15
i’ve never seen you make the same insistence with a little letter called “a” in a little word called “america.”
Because “americA” looks funny.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:15
OK. at everyone’s urchin, I’ll stop the fish puns.
Fry dontcha?
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:16
Check your Spelling.
Aaron’s spawn.
I thought the capitalization was a dead giveaway, but apparently, our little troll friend ain’t that bright.
Looch said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:17
our little troll friend ain’t that bright.
Probably has a mullet.
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:17
Y’know, if we all went up to that “Contact” linky-dinky up top and sent an email to all of Sadly,No! contributors, I bet we’d get a new thread, fershure.
either that, or we’d break the hamsters.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:18
our little troll friend ain’t that bright.
Probably has a mullet.
And thinks we’re all knee gars.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:18
Oh hell, someone had to go there…
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:18
break the hamsters
I remember that song! Red Hot Chili Gerbils, wasn’t it?
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:22
I thought the capitalization was a dead giveaway, but apparently, our little troll friend ain’t that bright..
This your first time at the rodeo?
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:26
This your first time at the rodeo?
Keep hope alive, I say.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:32
No way Lou Dobbs would take the pay cut to go into public service. He’s going to Fox.
I swallowed hard this morning….go ahead, I’ll wait…
I swallowed hard this morning and watched Imus on FoxBiz, which could conceivably be the most annoying visual thing on TV, apart from Rosie O’Donnell and maybe Greta Susteren.
Anyway, I know that Imus and Lou are really good friends and I wanted to hear his take on things, and they had some bubbleheaded blonde from FoxBiz giving what passes for a business report. Imus asked her if she thought Dobbs was headed to Fox, and called him a psychopath…but he loves him.
I’m not sure Dobbs is heading there, but it would make a nice fit for him and would round out the rather…insane…line up of crackpot and conspiracists over there.
In a related development, Sean Hannity actually admitted that Olbermann was right, and that Hannity had used footage from another protest to DC to illustrate the size of the crowds for the Sept. 12 teabagging…I mean, protest.
Two months later, and all hushhush, of course. I wonder if you could actually hear him use the word “apologize”…
refrain, audacious tar said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:37
Aaron’s spawn.
eleazar, nadab, abihu or ithamar? poor, poor ithamar, whom everyone forgets just like julian lennon.
nevermind the why and wherefore said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:40
some bubbleheaded blonde from FoxBiz
should’ve gone with “bubbleheaded bleach blonde” for the don henley reference for the win.
D.N. Nation said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:42
It was Jon Stewart who pointed out the bogus clip, right?
Here’s what I like about all this: Bachmann and Hannity were claiming that 40,000 people came to the event (probably overestimating four times over), and using old footage to prove their point. The old footage was from an event that these goobers claimed had two million participants.
Double self-ownage. I love it.
Homer J Simpson said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:45
It was Jon Stewart who pointed out the bogus clip, right?
D’Oh!
Gimme two months. I’ll apologize to Stewart.
Homer J Simpson said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:46
should’ve gone with “bubbleheaded bleach blonde” for the don henley reference for the win.
She doesn’t bleach.
Ask me how I know.
Jim/TVB said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:49
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fictional_characters_in_the_Timeline-191_series
Paul Mantarakis is a fictional character in an alternate history novel by Harry Turtledove, one in which the Confederates win.
I suspect that’s why he types things like “I reckon we’re needed.” If that sounds anachronistic, it’s because the character died in 1916–staying in character.
(Apologies if this has been pointed out before. It’s also odd that he didn’t mention deployment in his previous visits here.)
twif said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:52
late to the party, but i have to say that i have always believed the only way to enact true change is to yell at anonymous people on the internet.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 18:54
Boy, leave your desk for a few minutes and your pseudonyms just try to take over…
slippy said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:04
I am never, ever going to be able to read this whole thread. I don’t have enough time, and it’s growing now like a bacterium invading some young home-schooled wingnut’s spinal fluids.
Speaking of which:
Paul, we done tried facts & logic years and years ago. We were told that we in the “reality-based community” were just fucking gay for thinking that facts mattered. Also, we were told we were not American enough because we failed to wear our Made in China flag pins ebulliently enough, and that besides we were cheese-eating surrender monkeys who would welcome our Islamic Overlords with open arms.
After that, fuck it. There was no point in a factual, logical, or polite conversation. I can only handle being told I’m not a real American (born in Utah, grew up in Colorado, spent my adulthood in Kentucky) and I’m just some Coastal Elitist bleeding heart queerbate who doesn’t know what Heartland America is about. I’ve also been told that because I’m a liberal I can’t have a real (six figure) job (in IT) and of course know nothing of family (two children, married 17 years — unfortunately recently divorced but at least not because my wife was lying on a hospital bed with terminal cancer unlike your paragon of Fambly Values Newt Gingrich) values or anything else.
At this point I, and probably most libs, had decided that you conservatools are bigoted, small-minded, ignorant, arrogant, assholes and that civility and polity have left the room since, oh, about 1997. So, in closing, fuck what you think sideways off into outer space.
cyntax said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:07
Well said slippy. Although 1997 seems a tad generous.
handy said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:10
Not a hard call. FOX News likes them the pure and Nordic wimmin folk.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:13
FOX News likes them the pure and Nordic wimmin folk
You mean Aryans.
Major Kong said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:16
slippy – that rant was a thing of pure beauty.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:18
If you leave a thread for long enough, eventually when you come back it’s like having a brand new thread!
Sorta.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:25
Slippy, if you start a blog I promise to read it every day.
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:27
So a few days ago we finally crossed the threshold–double digit unemployment this is despite Hopey’s “stimulus” program, he said WITHOUT the stimulus that we MIGHT see unemployment cross 8%. Waaaaaaay off there, BO. And when you take into account the number of people who have stopped looking for work, and those only working part-time who want full-time work, unemployment is closer to 20%.
How do you think those people who have been laid off or unable to find work will vote next time, libs? Do you think they will re-elect the Democrat Party when unemployment is 13% in 2012? Even if we miraculously begin adding jobs at a 1990s pace, unemployment won’t go below 6% until 2015.
Must suck to be in charge of the federal government right now!
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:30
Poor Troofie…dude, it must be tough being the last troll in on a long thread…I feel pity for you.
No, actually, it’s contempt. I lied.
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:32
And unlike Reagan, Hopey can’t lower interest rates (they’re already at ZERO) and he can’t cut taxes. In fact, he’s going to RAISE taxes soon when the Bush tax cuts expire, digging an even deeper whole for the economy.
Look Who Cares About The Common Man All Of A Sudden said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:33
Must suck to be in charge of the federal government right now!
No thanks to the idiots who were in charge the previous eight years, Troofus.
cyntax said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:34
Must suck to be in charge of the federal government right now!
Yeah, but at least it’s a problem he’ll try to address. Unlike BushCo who’d just be off at his ranch, playing at being a cowboy. Or your party of nope who’ll recommend… wait for it:
tax cuts!
Run along and let the adults try to fix your mess.
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:34
Blame everyone but himself–the new Obama/lib mantra.
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:35
The “adults” you speak of already tried to “fix the mess” with massive government spending (a ONE TRILLION dollar “stimulus”) and even by their own measures, it FAILED.
Own your failure, libs.
cyntax said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:36
In fact, he’s going to RAISE taxes soon when the Bush tax cuts expire, digging an even deeper whole for the economy.
Must suck to have so little understanding of economics that the only solution your ideology allows you to apply to any problem is tax cuts. Thank jeebus we had FDR when we needed him.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:36
Great, now it smells like old fish and wingnugget flop sweat. And who left the Limburger & egg salad sandwich in the sauna?
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:37
What do you think raising taxes by billions of dollars will do to an economy already in the toilet?
Taxes take money from productive people that could be used to invest and create jobs and confiscates it to use on an unproductive thing (government). Government does not produce any goods, and what services it does provide are of inferior quality to the private sector.
g said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:37
that’s our Troofy. Rejoicing in bad news. Why does he hate Amurika?
Look Who Cares About The Common Man All Of A Sudden said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:38
Own your failure, libs.
The failure is all yours, dumbass.
cyntax said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:38
Shouldn’t you be bringing up the Laffer Curve right about now?
No-Visible-Means said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:38
#
Major Kong said,
November 12, 2009 at 12:25
In case you missed it, I am 10th Mountain Division at Ft. Drum and I am going to be deployed.
The 10th Mountain Division is an active duty unit. You said you were National Guard.
Heeee!! The troll walked right into that one. The Mountain Division of the National Guard is from Vermont. Not quite Ft Drum, is it Paul??
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:38
The first thing libs need to learn about the world is “Government cannot create wealth, only private investors can”.
handy said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:39
The first thing libs need to learn about the world is “Government cannot create wealth, only private investors can”.
Spoof alert.
Troofy the Fox said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:39
Yeah, I didn’t want those grapes anyway!
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:40
“the failure is all yours”
I’ll tell that to Barney Frank and Chriss Dodd.
g said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:45
Troofy hasn’t got any solutions, anyway, so why listen to him? He’s like the nagging spouse (either gender) who has nothing to contribute but criticism. And when there’s trouble, all he does is nag and complain, never pitches in.
His annoying character here has to be an accurate reflection of his personal character in real life.
I hope he’s a single recluse – I’d pity someone living with him.
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:48
Solutions?
How about we cut wasteful spending from the government. How about less taxes, less programs, less government, and less burdensome regulation?
proud officer, that haughty lip uncurl! said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:50
seriously, dragon age is a terrible game and i don’t know why i keep playing it. i wish there were something that somehow combined the princess bride with the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy and also had a killer 80s soundtrack. i would never ever bother with real life again.
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:53
How about less taxes, less programs, less government, and less burdensome regulation?
“Now step over to the Taxcutinator and I will shout slogans at you!”
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:54
Yay! Less government! Less burdensome regulation! There’s still some beef in this country that doesn’t have Mad Cow in it! There are still some bridges that HAVEN’T fallen down! This is unacceptable!
N.C. said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:54
Yeah! Who wants to use those crummy government interstate highways, when we have such a delightful selection of privately-run ones?
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:56
Because after all, tax cuts for the rich are a solution that has never been tried before in all of our history. How do we know it won’t lead to a fabulous economic renaissance? You liberals have no sense of innovation!
Ted the Slacker said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:56
Frist!
The Party of Responsibility said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:57
The last eight years weren’t MY responsibility, nope, nope!
How High Will Unempoyment Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:58
If I remember the economy did very well under Bush until the Democrats took over Congress. Hmmmm….
OneMan said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:59
“How about we cut wasteful spending from the government.”
Excellent. Let’s start with the military. You know, the one we spend more on than the next 40 countries combined? How many Cold War era programs do we need to keep?
Then, lets cut the give-aways to the coal and oil industries. Let’s cut the subsidies to the agriculture industry.
Hey, this is fun!
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:59
705th!
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 12, 2009 at 19:59
i would never ever bother with real life again.
Again?
JM said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:00
If I remember …
Obviously you don’t.
JM said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:01
How about less taxes, less programs, less government, and less burdensome regulation?
Just like Somalia. Brilliant.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:01
If I remember the economy did very well under Bush until the Democrats took over Congress. Hmmmm….
I like this way of thinking.
“The stairs collapsed because you set foot on them, not because water has been eroding the bedrock underneath them for years! It’s all YOUR fault!”
The Party of Responsibility said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:02
I always blame everyone but myself for my mistakes, yup, yup, durrrr….
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:03
Just like Somalia.
Only without all those awful Somalians spraying their graffiti everywhere.
The Party of Responsibility said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:04
Mission Accomplished! Bring it On! Yup, yup, durrr…
kingubu said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:11
f I remember the economy did very well under Bush until the Democrats took over Congress.
Shuffling to the bathroom this morning I farted and right at that moment the sun peeked over the horizon. Y’all motherfuckers better keep feeding me homemade enchiladas or the sun might go away forever.
Eric Cartman said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:11
My mom says there’s a lot of black people in Somalia
The Party of Responsibility said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:17
Even though I admit that Saddam had nothing to do with 9/11, burning trillions of dollars on a pointless war against Iraq obviously had no effect on the economy! Yup, yup, durrr….
Rusty Shackleford said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:19
…burning trillions of dollars on a pointless war against Iraq obviously had no effect on the economy!
Au contraire, mon frere. It’s been great for the prosthetic limb industry.
gild the farthing if you will, yet it is a farthing still said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:19
i would never ever bother with real life again.
Again?
i make occasional excursions.
Lurking Canadian said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:20
Of all the wingnut whinging, I find the whinging about “excessive regulation” perhaps the most tiresome. Thus the following open letter:
Dear Wingnuts,
If your company can’t make a profit without killing, poisoning and/or maiming your employees; or without polluting air, land and water; or without producing substandard, dangerous or non-functioning products; if the only hope you see for the economy is a return to the days when human life was cheap, fraud was a way of life and the Earth was assumed to be infinite, U R DOIN IT RONG! Sit down and let somebody else have a turn.
No love at all,
Me
handy said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:22
Speaking of which, remember how under Dubya when it was obvious how things were sucking even then, that wingnuts never blamed Clinton or Carter or the liberal media, but totally owned up to their mistakes and made America a safer place? Remember that? Yeah, me neither.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:28
But but but I lust after Dragon’s Age: Origins like I have lusted after nothing before, not even Jason Scott Lee or B.D. Wong, and that is saying something. Please, please don’t tell me it’s terrible! I’m going to buy it anyway, and all your warning is going to do is make me feel bad the morning after.
justme said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:30
Damn, that stinks.
No more enchiladas for you, kingubu.
Oh, nevermind, it’s just Toofless.
I can haz better trolls nao?
pedestrian said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:30
Icky buttsecks makes Jesus say fuck the poor.
justme said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:32
Built of 100% win.
How High Can Dudgeon Go? said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:35
You libs want solutions? Here’s your solution: FIX EVERYTHING!
justme said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:37
Pedestrian,
Between this and their direct lobbying for Stupak the Catholic Church needs to lose their tax-exempt status. Unfortunately, that’s almost as likely as Lieberman losing his chair of the Homeland Security Committee.
N__B said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:37
And who left the Limbau
rgher & egg salad sandwich in the sauna?Fiqqst.
The Goddamn Batman Leaves S,N! Alone For One Minute, One Freakin' Minute, And What Does He Find? said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:38
Honestly, people.
wink is often good as nod said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:39
But but but I lust after Dragon’s Age: Origins like I have lusted after nothing before, not even Jason Scott Lee or B.D. Wong, and that is saying something. Please, please don’t tell me it’s terrible! I’m going to buy it anyway, and all your warning is going to do is make me feel bad the morning after.
well my complaints are mainly:
1) i’ve come to loathe the tagalong randroid mage whom i have to keep bribing with sad little trinkets to get her to like me so she keeps fighting well. she’s also basically an xp vulture against easy targets and useless vs more difficult magic resistant targets.
2) long cinematic scenes and dialogue scenes i can’t seem to fast forward through. these are supposed to make the game feel more like interactive fiction, but it cramps my killing and acquiring style.
3) everything is linear and quest driven. no blundering around aimlessly having random encounters. of course i haven’t played a next gen game yet that encouraged that, not even oblivion, so maybe that aspect of gaming is just passe’. maybe i’m just a dinosaur.
if you really want a piece of interactive fantasy fiction, it’s probably a pretty good game. and the voiceover work is really pretty good. i think some people will really have a serious hard on for the game, but personally i’m just waiting for left for dead to come out.
Jacob Singer said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:47
The pc version of Dragon’s Age: Origins is indeed completely awesome. Higly recommended to old-school rpg fans.
And yeah, Troofy, if M’cPalin had been elected everyone in America would be gainfully employed, there’d be now wars, the economy would be surging, and you’d be getting laid, right?
Jacob Singer said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:48
Freakin’ typos… grrrr…
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:50
Yeah, I would have a hard time deciding between Left for Dead 2 and a willing JSL. Perhaps it speaks to my advanced age, but at this point I would actually lean toward the video game…
justme said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:51
The question is, ‘no” or “new”?
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:52
Can we get a thousand comments, folks? Don’t stop now!!!
The pc version of Dragon’s Age: Origins is indeed completely awesome. Higly recommended to old-school rpg fans.
So, political correctness has now infected the “kill things, take their stuff” genre of gaming? How is it PC? Are the orcs misunderstood freedom fighters, driven to sack villages because they’ve be plowed under by the evil faerie/industrial complex? *snerk*
Teh Original Sadly Zombie Thread said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:58
I WILL NEVER BE DEFEATED
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 20:59
And yeah, Troofy, if M’cPalin had been elected everyone in America would be gainfully employed, there’d be now wars, the economy would be surging, and you’d be getting laid, right?
You Liberals and your idealistic fantasy worlds. Try living in REALITY sometime, crazypants.
but nothin' can change the fact that we used to share a bed... said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:00
cs lewis, th white, cp snow, and jrr tolkein walk into a bar.
note the use of the oxford comma, to snub the cambridge men. i am a very subtil zemblan
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:01
It would take more than the demonic miracle that would cause a Palin presidency to get Troofus laid. Unless we are talking about goats again.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:04
In fact, he’s going to RAISE taxes soon when the Bush tax cuts expire, digging an even deeper whole for the economy.
1993: The Clinton administration raises taxes, thus creating the single biggest economc expansion, not in American history, but in the history of the world.
You might want to study economics, shit head.
troofus and the plastic ruppert band said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:06
Troofus laid. Unless we are talking about goats again.
whatever gets me through the night
it’s alright
alright
alright
(don’t need a gun to blow your mind)
pedestrian said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:06
justme,
Couldn’t agree more. I just can’t believe that even that Catholic Church would hold homeless people and orphans hostage in order to deny civil rights to others. Why does religion make people so evil?
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:08
If I remember the economy did very well under Bush until the Democrats took over Congress.
Guess again, shithead!
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:16
When a six-year-old plays Mozart from sheet music, is it Mozart’s fault that it doesn’t sound good?
So when a group of selfish, closeted pigs interpret a thousand-plus year old set of spiritual ideas to mean that they should deny people rights and starve the poor (while they diddle choirboys), in direct opposition to what the set of ideas actually exhort them to do, why do you blame the ideas? Isn’t it more the fault and responsibility of the pigs?
Correlation said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:17
1993: The Clinton administration raises taxes, thus creating the single biggest economc expansion, not in American history, but in the history of the world.
Oh, hey there. You must have me confused with my brother.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:17
Why does religion make people so evil?
An immortal, omnipotent superbeing would get really, really bored, so it would stir up all kinds of nasty crap just for shits and giggles.
On a good day, such a being would cook up something wacky, like the platypus, but on a bad day-WATCH OUT!
As Tom Waits put it, “Don’t you know there ain’t no devil, there’s just God when he’s drunk.”
open up your eyes just to check that you're asleep again said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:21
When a six-year-old plays Mozart from sheet music, is it Mozart’s fault that it doesn’t sound good?
and when a ten year old mexican boy copies and pastes republican talking points onto the internet, you get gary ruppert. http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/003612.html
proudly awards self s,n! lore merit badge
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:23
Correlation said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:17
Shhhhhhhhhhh, it makes as much sense as the crap Troofie posts.
Unfortunately, it happens to be true…
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:25
On a good day, such a being would cook up something wacky, like the platypus, but on a bad day-WATCH OUT!
Personally, I’m with Spinoza on this issue:
God created the earth and heavens and universe and then went off and made himself a nice ham sandwich.
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:41
An immortal, omnipotent superbeing would get really, really bored, so it would stir up all kinds of nasty crap just for shits and giggles.
Gods used to be much more with the god+people sexytime. Sure, godly golden showers and swan-rape can get old, too, but stirring shit up over and over is boring AND orgasmless. Unless you’re a neocon, of course.
welcome to your life, there's no turning back said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:44
i’m with kierkegaard, generally speaking. but also wittgenstein.
obama is down with tillich, which i find one of his more troublesome leanings.
although it could be worse. if we ever have a president who reads plantinga, i’m moving to zembla.
the dreams in which i'm dyin' are the best i've ever had said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:47
golden showers and swan-rape
i saw that film. a pinter/losey collaboration, i think. later referenced in songs by lovers and sad giants, the psychedelic furs, and, strangely enough, an episode of hill street blues.
the dreams in which i'm dyin' are the best i've ever had said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:49
sad lovers and giants, rather. they might be sad giants, too. but giants have no reason to be sad, since they were watchers and taught the comely daughters of men to wear eyeliner then fucked their brains out. it wasn’t until robert smith that someone taught the comely sons of men to properly wear eyeliner.
g said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:51
Roy has the advance SCOOP on “Going Rogue.”
Hilarious.
i knocked 'em dead in dallas, and i didn't pay my dues said,
November 12, 2009 at 21:56
actually i thought roy phoned in his palin piece. if you replace references to middle american icons with “starbucks” and “american apparel” and “i’m paying 3000 dollars a month for this apartment? seriously?” it could read like an unfunny corn pone comedian making fun of new york.
the best take on palin, naturally, comes from taibbi. http://trueslant.com/matttaibbi/2009/11/02/palinoia-sarah-palin-going-rogue-book-autobiography-memoir/
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:07
756th
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:09
I think it was Descarte who famously said “Go fuck yourself Troofie!”
Nietzsche said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:12
That which does not kill the thread makes it stranger.
imagineer said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:13
A thousand? Can I hear one-thousand?!
tigrismus said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:13
Quand viendra la
saisonposte nouvelle,Quand auront disparu les froids,
Tous les deux nous irons, ma belle,
Pour cueillir le muguet aux bois;
Sous nos pieda égrenant les perles
Que l’on voit au matin trembler
Nous irons écouter les merles
Siffler.
PeeJ said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:14
I’d advise skipping the mayo.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:16
Wham
bang
mon chat “Splash” gite sur mon lit a bouffe
Sa langue en buvant trop mon whysky
Quand a moi peu dormi
vide
brime
J’ai du dormir dans la goutiere
Oil j’ai un flash
ouh
ouh
ouh.
En 4 couleurs
allez op
un matin
Une louloute est v’nue chez moi
Poupee de cellophane
cheveux chinois
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:18
Sure, godly golden showers and swan-rape can get old, too, but stirring shit up over and over is boring AND orgasmless.
Yeah, the current deity only got it on with one gal- WTF? Whatever happened to those gods who were into gender-bending barnyard sexytime?
swan-rape
Resisting the urge to post duck-rape links yet again… sorry, I am simultaneously creeped out and obsessed with the Anatidae- they look so comical, but, as I wrote before- WATCH OUT!
Marion in Savannah said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:18
One small word from Savannah, one small comment closer to 1000…
g said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:20
As Twoofy would say:
“Hmmmmmm. Hmmmmmmm?”
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:21
…but ducks can’t be raped!
PeeJ said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:24
Zevran!
Note: Possibly NSFW.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:25
…but ducks can’t be raped!
Because they dress so slutty — they’re just asking for it.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:26
Because they dress so slutty — they’re just asking for it.
Flicking their asses back and forth, I know, has many times made me ponder it…
I mean, some men.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:26
They don’t just ask for it…they flock to it.
Andrew N.P. said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:27
Shhhhhhhhhhh, it makes as much sense as the crap Troofie posts.
Unfortunately, it happens to be true…
Oh. Well, all right then.
And while we’re on the subject, you know who else kickstarted the economy by passing a massive tax hike? Hitler.
model for hobos and mirror of misers said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:31
i’ve seen this kind of thing happen before. this site has been abandoned. there will never again be another main page post. bookmark it.
Marion in Savannah said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:36
773
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:37
this site has been abandoned.
I’m not willing to write it off just yet. Elton Beard’s site, now that’s dead.
But even the Poor Man Institute has awakened again, for the moment, so there is yet hope.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:37
Man, this thread is separating the men from the boys.
Except for the elf video.
HAL 9000 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:37
Well, I don’t think there is any question about it. It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before and it has always been due to human error.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:38
Oh, wait, was that gay nsfw?
See, now I’m gonna click on it.
Arky said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:38
Our hosts went Galt then they were bitten by zombies and now they ARE zombies and their fingers keep flying every where when they type.
IT’S TRUE!
Coach Mike Woodson said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:39
Super sup, crazy commies! Da Cooler Coach here, live from Phreaky Philips with J-SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! Too bad you loony libs can’t withstand the HIGHLIGHT of LOSING soon to be dunked all over you in 2010 and 2012 once America gets downwind from Obambi’s socialist overreach! Ya better believe that the Comeback Cons are leading the way with Spectacular Sarah, the Proud Palin! Moh-moh-moh-MONSTER KILL, libs! Woody out.
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:40
Daisy..daisy…give me your…answer do…
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:41
Orly court filing, Ahooga!
http://wonkette.com/tag/pt-eww/
http://www.scribd.com/doc/21451147/Lucas-Daniel-Smith-10-12-09-new-Declaration-SACV09-00082-DOC-Anx
A choice excerpt from page 9 of the court filing. Yes Court Filing.
Verbatim quote from ex-lover. shudder.
“She’s a bitch. She’s crazy. She’s a crazy bitch.”
That Girl said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:42
And when you take into account the number of people who have stopped looking for work, and those only working part-time who want full-time work, unemployment is closer to 20%.
It’s kind of funny how this stastistic only exists during Democratic administrations.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:43
Oh god, his description of sex with Oily Tits….I’M BLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIND!!!!!!!!
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:52
Verbatim quote from ex-lover. shudder.
“She’s a bitch. She’s crazy. She’s a crazy bitch.”
Look, if you’re trying to ruin my lunch, why wouldn’t you go with:
Because it is these half-measures, finally, that defeat us.
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:52
Looks like Coach Urban Meyer changed his name. Fresh from his 9th grade remedial English class and trying too hard to be cool. Oh and turn your baseball cap around the right way DUDE! That shit went out when you were in diapers.
Steerpike said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:55
This thread has been declared dead more times than John Travolta’s career.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:55
hotter, hornier, wetter, tighter, more of a nympho than I’ve ever met, in fact.
Think of the children, man!
THINK OF THE ZOMBIES!
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 22:55
why wouldn’t you go with:
Copy/paste fail. I was going to excerpt a couple of paragraphs.
mankind is destroyed, sprinkled in the void. la la lalala la la lalala said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:00
actually coach urban meyer is one of my favourite posters. i always look forward to his appearances.
HAL 9000 said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:00
I feel much better now, I really do.
The We Give A Huge Shit Squad said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:02
actually coach urban meyer is one of my favourite posters. i always look forward to his appearances.
Thanks.
hipster coach urban meyer said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:07
ding dong dilly, lame-o libs. i’m here to serve up a spread of truth about the obummer.
itwasntme said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:08
Re-reading the actual post this time, I notice that the wingnuts have made two contradictory claims:
1. Dems are socialistcommies who want to destroy corporations; and
2. Dems have ruled corporations for the past 50 years.
We sure took our time destroying them, didn’t we?
the man who mistook his hat for a wife said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:09
Thanks.
You’re welcome. Pleased to meet me.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:11
We sure took our time destroying them, didn’t we?
That’s where “Dems are incompetent” fits in.
This Is The Way Teh Sadly Ends said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:14
Not with a bang, but with a plethora of Goober posts.
handy said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:24
Goobers just aren’t the same since they got bought out by Nestle.
gocart mozart said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:26
798
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:28
**Sigh**
Thread..so..heavy…hard to…carry..forward…
J Neo Marvin said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:28
That’s where “Dems are incompetent” fits in.
If you’re looking to have things truly DESTROYED, there’s only one party to vote for. It’s the one thing Republicans do well.
Smut Clyde said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:34
when a ten year old mexican boy copies and pastes republican talking points onto the internet
That’s Amore!See, I can move on from applying the same joke on every occasion.
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:39
See, I can move on from applying the same joke on every occasion.
That’s no more!
Ignorance and Apathy, LLC said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:40
I don’t know and…oh shit, look at the time…
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:44
Boy howdy, I tell you…the proprietors of this place are going to owe us thread, tubs of thread….
Smut Clyde said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:44
Sous nos pieds égrenant les perles
Tigrismus lowers the level of discourse with a pearl-necklace reference.
OneMan said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:46
I don’t know what it says about me that I’ve read every single one of the 800+ posts in this thread but I’m pretty sure it isn’t good.
But now that we’re here, let’s push on to four digits! C’mon, trolls, you can do it!
Tommmcatt said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:51
Yah, where is troofus? Aren’t there pages to be bookmarked, great liberal freakouts to be a-started? Back in the day, trolls had a WORK ethic….
actor212 said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:54
Back in the day, trolls had a WORK ethic….
I’m very concerned.
I mean, he’s even stopped stalking me on-line, and Googling me and sending threatening e-mails to my spamtrap…
slippy said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:59
Jesus, your memory SUCKS.
The economy took a giant steaming SHIT almost as soon as Bush was appointed and started vehemently talking it down. It took another SHIT when 9/11 struck, and then unemployment went WHEEEEEEE for just about everyone starting in 2002, and the job market swirled down the shitter and has basically NEVER recovered.
What fucking fantasy land were you living in when the economy did well over the last 9 years? Nobody else thinks so, doofus.
Jacob Singer said,
November 12, 2009 at 23:59
Troofie’s still working on that magnum opus which will utterly disgrace the diabolical Obama children.
So far, he’s pretty sure that since they’re girls, they most certainly have cooties.
Scott said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:00
I mean, he’s even stopped stalking me on-line, and Googling me and sending threatening e-mails to my spamtrap…
Tell us a story?
Also, are our proprietors going to come back tomorrow, post a lengthy rant about “safe spaces,” and demand to know if we’re “all in”?
cyntax said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:01
Is it me or is this thread starting to feel like we’re trapped in the S,N! version of a Beckett play?
Waiting for Godot or Endgame?–your call.
actor212 said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:02
Also, are our proprietors going to come back tomorrow
I would have put even money on that…until SOMEone posted details from the Orly Taitz civil suit documents…
*glaraing at gocart mozart*
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:02
From the department of bad writing and overwrought metaphors:
http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/11/tea_parties_misunderstood_and.html
Elected officials of every political stripe ought to be shaking down to their Gucci loafers and pumps. History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house. Yet they seem utterly oblivious.
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:03
Get up till I embrace you!
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:04
*glaraing at gocart mozart*
(hides head in shame)
slippy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:09
But, but, Laffer curve, Heritage Foundation, bork bork bork splutter blurhglaghalghr!!!! And also!
actor212 said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:10
History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.
Members are stiffening as openings are created for penetration into the deep dark dusky recesses of…
I need some water, please.
Snowwy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:10
Now is no time for dissension and pointing fingers of blame.
So I’ll just be over here, putting my fingers to other uses.
The Truth said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:11
Ahh, my beloved liberal droogs, imitating and obsessing about me forever and ever. It’s adorable the way you long for me to post, the way you create sockpuppets to mimic me (poorly) or pretend like very lost troll soul who happens upon this pathetic place is The Truth. Pretty soon you’ll lose all memory of your Gary Ruppert clown and have “The Truth” and all forms thereof starting off posts with the classic “The fact is…”
Amazing that you can’t handle victory. Mostly because it wasn’t victory at all, merely a corrupt media/ACORN/racist voter-influenced bump in the road for conservatism; truly a few years in the wilderness are doing the GOP well. Just look at the passion of the tea parties! Look at the millions we’ve had descend on Washington! Look at all that and pretend like you’ll still have majorities in 2010 and the White House in 2012. It is to laugh.
Unaware of your own demise, you poor, poor droogs fritter away here at this lousy site, obsessed with your own trivial humor and faux-hipster obsessions. And me, always me. Bookmark this, libs, the clock ticks, ticks, ticks.
Snowwy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:13
millions
A whole political movement of people who never learned to count. It is to weep.
actor212 said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:14
Bookmark this, libs, the clock ticks, ticks, ticks.
I’m guessing he doesn’t have a digital clock…
Snorghagen said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:14
But it ain’t separating the men from the ducks, if you know what I mean and I think you do.
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:14
really, PeeJ. That was gay.
actor212 said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:15
So I’ll just be over here, putting my fingers to other uses.
Diddling, Bo?
Snowwy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:16
Let’s just say I’ll be in mah bunk.
actor212 said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:16
if you know what I mean and I think you do.
I have NO idea! And who left all this down around my feet????
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:20
Ah. So the teabaggers are protesting for a vague … um, concept?
Boy, that should turn out well.
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:21
This comment contains some tough news. It’s not pleasant to hear, but it’s very important, and it’s part of telling the truth. If you disagree with my claim that The Truth is hell-bent on suppressing our freedom, then read no further.
For brevity, I won’t comment further on that but rather on the way that Truth’s idiotic claim that rash roustabouts are all inherently good, sensitive, creative, and inoffensive is just that, an idiotic claim. Truth says he’s going to create an ideological climate that will enable him to use paid informants and provocateurs to annihilate a person’s personality, individuality, will, and character sooner or later. Good old Truth. He just loves to open his mouth and let all kinds of things come out without listening to how shiftless they sound. By the same token, he shouldn’t engage in the trafficking of human beings. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to wait for the answer, exiting the auditorium before the response. Both of those actions draw unsuspecting antagonists into the orbit of immoral, unholy beguilers.
I could accept, perhaps, bunco games backed by the forces of logic and powerful reasoning. Rantings marked with hypocrisy and contradiction, however, merit none of my respect. I don’t need to tell you that Truth is battening on us. That should be self-evident. What is less evident is that Truth has been trying for some time to sell the public on an emotionalism-based government. His sales pitch proceeds both pragmatically and emotionally. The pragmatic argument: Truth is as innocent as a newborn lamb. The emotional argument: Interventionism forms the core of any utopian society. As you can see, neither argument is valid, which should indicate to you that the wild thugs that comprise Truth’s cameralism movement are as thick as thieves. If one of them is willing to undermine liberty in the name of liberty, then they all are. What’s more, none of them is able to accept that Truth has been known to say that his decisions are based on reason. That notion is so maladroit, I hardly know where to begin refuting it. Because The Truth is so caught up in trying to provoke terrible, total, universal, and merciless destruction, I’d like to conclude this letter by quoting to him the last line of R. M. Rilke’s poem, “Archaic Torso of Apollo”: “You must change your life.”
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:23
the
mankakapo who mistook his hat for a wife said,Fized
Looch said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:25
So, via TPM is this piece from a NY Daily News writer’s chance encounter with The Prez at Arlington Cemetery. A bit of a contrast from, “Now watch this drive.”
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/2009/11/12/2009-11-12_my_solemn_surprise_meeting_with_the_president_at_my_friends_resting_place.html?print=1&page=all
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:26
In the
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:26
interest of
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:26
getting this thread
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:27
past the 1K mark
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:28
, at which point we hope to be granted a new thread,
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:28
may I suggest
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:28
I’m personally obsessed with my own trivial obsessions, including an Obsession obsession, an Obsession obsession, and even an obsession obsession, but I have to say as a Christian, a family man, and a small-business owner that your obsession obsession obsession can lead nowhere good.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:29
WOLVERINES!!!!!
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:29
breaking up your comments
J Neo Marvin said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:31
BURMA SHAVE!
nonym said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:31
a Christian, a family man, and a small-business owner walk into a bar…
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:33
Rejected obsessions: “Obsession”, The Obsessed, Ossessione, visiting my alienist to deal with my issues with the river Ob, Circle of Two, Glenn Greenwald.
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:33
“this piece from a NY Daily News writer…”
See, he’s just a big phony. He should be in Texas, clearing brush like a real man.
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:34
History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.
That is HOT. But leaves me confuzzled, nonetheless.
“Unalienable rights” was a phrase I heard over and over again.
“Inalienable” is usually the phrase I hear, but then again I don’t grow ear potatoes on a commercial scale.
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:34
What this thread needs is a little Dash.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:35
WOL
J Neo Marvin said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:36
OK, since we’re all bored and trying to keep the thread poking along, how about a song?
The Granite Countertops cover “Lullaby For Hamza” by Robert Wyatt.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:36
VER
Looch said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:36
What this thread needs is a little Dash.
A pinch? A skosh? Or a **cough** dash?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:37
INES!!!
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:37
Who opened the troll jar? Was it you Actor?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:37
one
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:37
I had my proverbial brick wall torn down so that my aphorisms could roam free.
Looch said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:37
So I have used Macs and I have used PCs and I just wanna say…
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:39
EAT FAT
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:43
Maybe we should complain about Harry Reid for a while.
Andrew N.P. said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:45
History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.
So… people who live in glass houses shouldn’t… have… brick walls… built… next to… them?
Is there something in the conservative mindset that prevents them from using figures of speech correctly? Or is it just that none of them are native English speakers?
J Neo Marvin said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:48
What is the brick wall supposed to do to the glass house? Fall over on top of it? That would seem to be a metaphor for “we’re destroying ourselves and taking you with us!”, which, come to think of it, is a good summing up of the teapartyists’ goals.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:48
TDOS Wanker tells a “joke”.
http://confederateyankee.mu.nu/
“You know what the difference is between Bill Ayers wanting to put Americans in concentration camps for believing in capitalism, and Nancy Pelosi wanting to put you in prison for not buying government-rationed insurance?”
have you ever eaten ostrich? i have. said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:48
i don’t care what anyone says, mike was the better mst3k host than joel, even though joel’s skits were better. but mike’s rapport with the bots in the screening room was first rate.
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:49
Stupid is their mother tongue.
And they’re all about tongue-jacking the firm, firm bricks and showing us all through the transparent walls of their glass houses.
The Phone Company said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:50
Invoice for Mr Truth
For phoning it in – $0.01
Why not try our Unlimited Plan, with Rollover
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:52
Wait, I thought the point of a joke was to be funny…
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:52
So wait, maybe… history is firming up hard as a brick wearing two wetsuits and it’s peering in a conservatory at Congressional… tomatoes?
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:53
Magnificent Obsession: 1935 version with Irene Dunn and Robert taylor or Sirk’s later Wayman/Hudson remake? Show your work.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:55
Maybe we should complain about Harry Reid for a while.
He always leaves the toilet seat up. This alone makes him history’s greatest monster.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:55
I think the correct proverb is “It is easier for a brick wall to go through a stained glass window than it is for a camel to poke you in the eye with a needle.”
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:56
I will metion that Wayman was originally cast but Wyman stepped in after only a few days shooting.
Taylor. Also.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:57
Sirk, by a mile. Two words: Agnes Moorehead.
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:57
I blame WordPress.
And FY also.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:58
really, PeeJ. That was gay.
By now, you should know that it’s a feature, not a bug!
Now, PeeJ. what are you cooking?
J Neo Marvin said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:58
The Weather Underground did a lot of crazy and downright stupid shit, but I never heard of them planning concentration camps. WTF is he on about?
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 0:58
130 to go, libs!
Andrew N.P. said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:01
The Weather Underground did a lot of crazy and downright stupid shit, but I never heard of them planning concentration camps. WTF is he on about?
Simple. We all know that FEMA is building death camps. And what else does FEMA do? Clean up after natural disasters. And what causes a lot of natural disasters? Weather. It’s all connected, people! </glenn-beck>
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:02
Also, I think TDOS is confusing Bill Ayers with Michele Malkin. Also
OneMan said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:02
I call fake Glenn Beck.
No tears.
SomeNYGuy said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:10
That’s because he switched to Johnson & Johnson baby shampoo.
No-Visible-Means said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:11
Honestly, I think our overlords were sitting around a bar, and decided to start a pool. “How long can We not post but the commenters, will. Days? Weeks?
Whatever!! It’s a lot less work on Our part! The bet is on!!!
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:14
I will try to translate.
Elected officials of every political stripe ought to be shaking down to their Gucci loafers and pumps.[She' talking to you Lindsey Graham] History is forming and firming up harder than [veiled teabag reference]the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.[??] Yet they seem utterly oblivious.
Hmm, it must be a typo. I think she meant “dick wall” or “wall of dicks” as in the original Hebrew translation from Leviticus.
Paul T. Lazaro said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:15
I’ve rolled up my sleeves–let’s get this thing did!
Xecky Gilchrist said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:16
“How long can We not post but the commenters, will. Days? Weeks?
Whatever!! It’s a lot less work on Our part! The bet is on!!!
Current champeen: The Poor Man Institute, 33 days.
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:17
Because this thread is going longer than it should, I proudly present my list of novel slang terms for unspeakable acts:
- Soaking the cheadle.
- Admitting Florida.
- Boysenberry topping.
- Snickerdoodles.
- “Sad Men”.
- Teabagging the glass house.
- Hot glue pistol.
- The Wasilla Miracle.
- A “smoky eye”.
- Eggers.
- Calling in Thomas Paine.
- “The Prestige”.
- Unemployment insurance.
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:17
I know, BBB, I just thought I might point it out to PeeJ.
Also Bookmark My Balls, Troofus.
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:17
I personally believe they will return with a post that will rival both Catch 22 and Breakfast of Champions in it’s satirical magnificence, and bring the pillars of our corrupt plutocracy down in one grandiloquent thump.
I mean, they better, after all this…
Andrew N.P. said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:19
I mean, they better, after all this…
Don’t jinx it, or we’re just gonna get a crappy little “shorter.”
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:20
Also.
The Truthful Problem With Ruppert said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:21
Come down from your rage high enough to try and post normally have we, Troofus? But here’s the thing, even when you are relatively “sane”, for a trooful definition of sane, you and your life have just become an absolute parody… Observe!
Ahh, my beloved liberal droogs,
Quoting Clockwork Orange because, despite what those nasty liberals say about you, you aren’t a violent anti social fuckwit? Bound to work!
imitating and obsessing about me forever and ever. It’s adorable the way you long for me to post,
But you said you weren’t ever going to post here again! Why would we want an honest upstanding convservative to break his… Oh! I get it, you’ve been “pwned” as you sometimes claim you do to others here, and don’t yet realise it!
the way you create sockpuppets to mimic me (poorly) or pretend like very lost troll soul who happens upon this pathetic place is The Truth.
Now I could sit here and explain that no, no one really misses you, until we all fall about laughing at a reminder of you, as you yourself just stated… but that would be too painful an awareness to have wouldn’t it? Incidentally, the reason those “sockpuppets” are so “poor” is because no one cares enough to put any more effort in. This message is on course to have taken me maybe 5 minutes to type, including quote formatting. Ooooh such an important person you are, yes you are wikkle diddums!
Pretty soon you’ll lose all memory of your Gary Ruppert clown and have “The Truth” and all forms thereof starting off posts with the classic “The fact is…”
LOL WUT? I thought we thought everyone here was you? So you now claim that there’s more than one troll mocked here? And despite this place being so terrible, you admit now you obsessively read and learn and remember (even though you try to forget, addiction is a terrible thing isn’t it?) the other memes and habits of Sadly No! But don’t worry, that Bitch Ruppert won’t steal all your beloved attention forever! You’ll show him won’t you?! You’ll batter the progressives at Sadly No until they love you and you only!
Amazing that you can’t handle victory. Mostly because it wasn’t victory at all, merely a corrupt media/ACORN/racist voter-influenced bump in the road for conservatism;
And there’s the Troofus we all know and “love”! If Troofus can’t have the liberals, NO ONE CAN! Troofus DESTROY all sense of liberal accomplishment (he wishes)!
truly a few years in the wilderness are doing the GOP well. Just look at the passion of the tea parties! Look at the millions we’ve had descend on Washington!
Except… well, does it really need pointing out that Troofus’ amazingly wrong political radar claims millions for the Tea Bagging Orgy on the day when Glenn Beck himself has to admit he’s running video of a different event in Washington entirely, which itself never claimed anywhere near 3 figure attendance in the first place? How can one man be so consistently disconnected from actual “Truth”?!
Look at all that and pretend like you’ll still have majorities in 2010 and the White House in 2012. It is to laugh.
Sometime, somewhere, Troofus heard “it is to laugh”. And it wormed it’s way into his OCD addled mind and he thought; I must repeat that at every possible opportunity. And no one knows why. But he’ll do it, all the same, because argle bargle waaagh!
Unaware of your own demise, you poor, poor droogs fritter away here at this lousy site,
That you can’t give up either, don’t forget! :)
obsessed with your own trivial humor
That you try and parody, don’t forget!
and faux-hipster obsessions. And me, always me. Bookmark this, libs, the clock ticks, ticks, ticks.
And you, always you of course!
Ending with “Bookmark this, libs” though? In tribute to the previous prediction which got absolutely every state and the Presidency wrong?It’s just the cherry on the perfect, insane cake of idiocy! Come on, own up, which of you “libs” wrote this as a parody of The Truths fractured mind? It’s just too delicious a cake to be real, right?!
4 minutes 20 seconds to write by the way. Or WAS it? Am I making a hipster reference then? Or JUST PRETENDING to be a hipster, because we’re all “faux” hipsters, what ever that means in whacko world apparently? Poor old Truthy, hipsters stole a girl he used to sit in the bushes leering at (he never did get to talk to her) and wouldn’t accept his extreme reactionary views in their hipster student bars (he never wanted to go to them or get an education anyway) and now HE’S BEEN REJECTED BY PEOPLE WHO AREN’T EVEN REAL HIPSTERS!
Troofus…. RAGE! Troofus… SMASH!
cyntax said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:22
@ alec
What no “hiking the appalachian trail”?
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:22
In other news . . . Fuck the Catholic Church.
http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/us-bishops-vote-mandatory-feeding-veg
Paul T. Lazaro said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:23
Bravo, Alec. Might I suggest “The Mung Sprout?” It’s like 2 “smokey eyes,” but with a slightly larger pillow.
The Truth said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:23
The nature and extent of our current national crisis, as well as its causes and cures, are the subject of intense political struggle. I offer this letter as a contribution to that struggle and debate in hopes of helping to hone in on The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s faults with laser-like precision. For the sake of review, what The Truthful Problem With Ruppert is doing is not an innocent, recreational sort of thing. It is a criminal activity, it is an immoral activity, it is a socially destructive activity, and it is a profoundly grungy activity. Although I generally try to be tolerant of unabashed laziness, defiant incompetence, willful ignorance, and combative arrogance, he spouts a lot of numbers whenever he wants to make a point. He then subjectively interprets those numbers to support his endeavors while ignoring the fact that he keeps saying that the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved, beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters. This is exemplary of the nonsensical rhetoric and scaremongering that typifies the language of refractory spoilsports and other audacious, self-indulgent criminal masterminds.
Unsettling as that is, the more infuriating fact is that the main dissensus between me and The Truthful Problem With Ruppert is that I insist that it is of paramount importance not to let The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s worshippers keep essential documents hidden from the public until they become politically moot. He, on the other hand, contends that ebola, AIDS, mad-cow disease, and the hantavirus were intentionally bioengineered by lascivious, pudibund quacks for the purpose of population reduction. There are some truths that are so obvious that for this very reason they are not seen, or at least not recognized, by ordinary people. One noteworthy example is the truism that he wants to prevent us from commenting on his allegations. If he manages to do that, he’ll have plenty of time to focus on his core mission: turning boeotians loose against us good citizens. We need to look beyond the most immediate and visible problems with The Truthful Problem With Ruppert. We need to look at what is behind these problems and understand that The Truthful Problem With Ruppert has been trying to convince us that he has been robbed of all he does not possess. This pathetic attempt to force people to act in ways far removed from the natural patterns of human behavior deserves no comment other than to say that The Truthful Problem With Ruppert once tried to promote mediocrity over merit. If you consider this an exception to the rule then you clearly don’t understand how The Truthful Problem With Ruppert operates. I hope, however, that you at least understand that anyone who hasn’t been living in a cave with his eyes shut and his ears plugged knows that there is a format he should follow for his next literary endeavor. It involves a topic sentence and supporting facts.
All of these things are related: Bonapartism, The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s animadversions, and the general breakdown of our society. I’ll even tell you how they’re related. It’s really very simple. In essence, I plan to contribute to the intellectual and spiritual health of the body politic. This is a choice I have made; your choice is up to you. But let me remind you that The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s lickspittles have decided, behind closed doors and in closed sessions, to foster and intensify The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s drug-drenched drama of immorality. Well, that’s getting away from my main topic, which is that he always looks the other way when one of his zealots gets it in his head to write off whole sections of society. Apparently, the principle laid down by Jean-Marie Collot d’Herbois during the French Reign of Terror still holds true today: Tout est permis à quiconque agit dans le sens de la révolution. I can see from the length of what I’ve written so far that I should save the rest of my comments about The Truthful Problem With Ruppert for a future letter. Let me close by stating simply that The Truthful Problem With Ruppert’s meandering and maundering comments definitely indicate that he intends to sully my reputation by the next full moon.
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:25
Not if you’re old enough to swear, dear.
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:26
Indeed.
Paul T. Lazaro said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:26
Fuck the Catholic Church. Also.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:28
All right: Sadly, No! Industries can’t be arsed exposing the greatest swindle in history—an issue so explosive that it’s never mentioned in any of the weak-ass political polemics we see tossed back and forth by our two determined-to-conceal-the-crimes-of-capitalism political parties—so I will:
Cutting chocolate cake into square pieces does not magically convert it into “brownies!”
There! I said it! Let the heavens fall! WOLVERINES!!
Breaking News! said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:28
I’ve found the Truth’s wife, and boy does she like to Tart It Up!
itwasntme said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:30
wha?..
you in a cocktail skirt and me in a suit, well it just wouldn't work said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:30
personally believe they will return with a post that will rival both Catch 22 and Breakfast of Champions in it’s satirical magnificence,
you’re going with catch 22 and breakfast of champions with good as gold and cat’s cradle on the table, respectively? really?
t4toby said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:31
Yes, Reverend. Tell me about these ‘Magical’ ‘Brownies’.
No-Visible-Means said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:32
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:17
I personally believe they will return with a post that will rival both Catch 22 and Breakfast of Champions in it’s satirical magnificence, and bring the pillars of our corrupt plutocracy down in one grandiloquent thump.
Resist setting the bar to high!
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:32
I proudly present my list of novel slang terms for unspeakable acts:
You are such a newsletter tease.
Unaware of your own demise, you poor, poor droogs fritter away here at this lousy
Great, now I want fritters.
And the fact is, Gary’s hotter.
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:34
I loved Cat’s Cradle, by the way.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:34
History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.
Also, a tidal wave AND a perfect storm.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:36
How about just:
“forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick,
going Bachmann on her ass, and
making the one eyed Beck cry.”
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:36
Well if no one else is going to post the Sarah Palin hearts Moose Christmas Tree ornament, consider it done.
~
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:37
Somehow that is not the organ that leaps to mind when i hear the phrase “One-Eyed Beck”.
J Neo Marvin said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:39
Hey Rocky! Watch me pull a failed vice-presidential candidate out of my hat!
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:40
By the way, thanks,The Truthful Problem With Ruppert: I never thought of A Clockwork Orange, probably since it’s been 40 years since I read it. I truly wondered where the pseudo-Russian came from. I kind of assumed Troofy, like a lot of neocons, was an ex-commie, but then decided, no, he was too illiterate for that.
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:40
good christ. He actually said “it is to laugh!”
cyntax said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:41
“One-Eyed Beck”.
Wasn’t he in “Nailin Palin?”
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:42
Now, PeeJ. what are you cooking?
Nothing yet and I’m off to the market just now. Rest assured, whatever it is, it will be gay.
It’s chilly and rainy so I’m leaning towards something hearty and comforting. I’m also trending toward easy. Let me think … maybe …
Okay. Belgian stew (beef, braised in beer with onions, and carrots) ladled over garlicky smashed potatoes.
I’ve got some pears: clafoutis with poached pears might be on the table this evening.
Note to self: Pick up a few extra bottles of whatever dupel looks good.
Yeah, that will work.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:42
I’m also running an “Overstocked” sale on commas.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:42
In other news . . . Fuck the Catholic Church.
http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/us-bishops-vote-mandatory-feeding-veg
In response to recent Papal Bull, US bishops are considering whether vegetables should be mandatory.
I am outraged.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:43
Just look at the passion of the tea parties!
The power of Crist compels them.
~
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:47
History is forming and firming up harder than the proverbial brick wall right outside their congressional glass house.
Also, a tidal wave AND a perfect storm.
Mmm, how about the Winds of Change? And A New Broom?
FWIW, I’d think that a firmly hard brick wall right outside someone’s glass house would actually be a good thing, seeing as how it would protect it from thrown or falling objects.
N__B said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:48
Dateline: A mediocre hotel in DC.
So what’s new at S,N!?
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:50
I’ve got some pears: clafoutis with poached pears might be on the table this evening.
One of my fave fall desserts is a french pear tart with dark chocolate on the bottom of the shell. arrange the pears on the chocolate, then fill the shell with an egg/cream custard flavored with a little poire william, and bake.
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:54
I think she just got herself confused and mixed up the words. Perhaps she meant to refer to the proverbial brick shit-house and somethihng about a congressional glass slipper.
Excuse mah PIGLAHWIGLAHS.
Paul T. Lazaro said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:55
Brick Shit Moat?
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:57
Tonight for tea it is Diet Dr. Pibb, 2006 vintage, over white bread; for dinner a yam and a large bag Original Fritos.
Dessert: raw slab of pork fat with W Ketchup, America’s only ketchup, and rock salt.
PeeJ said,
November 13, 2009 at 1:59
really, PeeJ. That was gay.
t4toby, what else would you expect from me?
The power of Crist compels them.
Now THAT is gay.
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:00
FWIW, I’d think that a firmly hard brick wall right outside someone’s glass house would actually be a good thing, seeing as how it would protect it from thrown or falling objects.
Ruins the view, though.
One of my fave fall desserts is a french pear tart with dark chocolate on the bottom of the shell. arrange the pears on the chocolate, then fill the shell with an egg/cream custard flavored with a little poire william, and bake.
Ooh, share please!
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:03
Tomorrow’s breakfast is bologna to taste, and for lunch (if all goes according to plan) half a bottle of Italian dressing with a chaser of $2 worth of hard liquor.
Bitter Scribe said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:03
Cutting chocolate cake into square pieces does not magically convert it into “brownies!”
It does if Rush Limbaugh sits on it first.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:04
People who live in glass houses should not own trebuchets. Ivory towers, on the other hand, are fine.
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:06
Also, the only brick I care about is the brick of imitation crab I left out to dry for tomorrow’s tea.
Jacob Singer said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:08
Tonight I’m having lobster Thermidor aux crevettes with a Mornay sauce garnished with truffle paté, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:09
Cutting chocolate cake into square pieces does not magically convert it into “brownies!”
It does if Rush Limbaugh sits on it first.
Those are “crepes.”
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:10
I thought what you found attached to Big Pharma’s ass was Republican congressmen.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:12
In other news…
As it turns out, JiSM did fuck Palin after all.
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:22
She said when she asked the McCain campaign if it would help her financially, she was told McCain’s camp would have paid all the bills if he’d won; since he lost, the vetting legal bills were her responsiblity
For some reason, I don’t believe this. Did they pass the cost of vetting any other potential candidate around?
also, $500,000 seems like too much to pay for the little amount of vetting they got.
The Truthful Problem With Ruppert said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:25
Oh I noticed it straight away (having tried to learn the language, and my degree being in Russian History, filthy communist that I am) but you don’t want to think too deeply about the fact that The Truth seriously self identifies with Alex DeLarge… especially when you remember what he does to a Liberal and his wife in both book and film. Because whilst Burgess included that element partly as a catharsis for his own wife’s rape, and his struggles with the emotions it brought forth for a decent person in a violent, shitty world, The Truth quotes it because…. well… the nicest we can hope for is just a complete lack of any social awareness at all and he’s easily distracted by Kubrickian shinies. Hopefully.
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:25
Palin laments that she wasn’t allowed to bring up loads of family members to the stage while McCain gave his election night concession speech, the vice presidential candidate having found out minutes earlier that she wouldn’t be permitted to give her own speech.
Puh-lease! It’s still all about her, isn’t it?
She alleges that Couric and CBS left out her more “substantive” remarks and settled for “gotcha” moments.
I predict the upcoming release of some out-takes.
Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:30
One of my fave fall desserts is yet another beer, at the close of dinner.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:32
One of my fave fall desserts is yet another beer
What’s an Irish seven course dinner?
A potato and a six-pack.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:33
also, $500,000 seems like too much to pay for the little amount of vetting they got.
I think your dog got more vetting.
~
Tommmcatt said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:36
A $500,000 for vetting Sarah Palin at that point in her life is tantamount to paying $250,000 for each event that wasn’t typical for your average community college graduate housewife.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:37
(1) Back before she had a regular income stream from the lecture circuit,
Palin hit up her supporters for $$$ “to pay her legal bills for frivolous ethics complaints”.
(2) Someone queried why so much money was needed, and whether they can expect back any of it that wasn’t used.
(3) Palin explains that half a mill was actually reimbursement to the McCain campaign (who evidently pressed their expense claims more forcefully than the RNC did with its clothing bill).
Should we believe her? Decisions, decisions.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:37
Q. Do the wingnuts love you?
A. Yes.
Q. Are you a vaginal-american and have PUMA appeal?
A. Yes.
Q. Will you throw around baseless incendiary charges about my opponent, stuff like “palling around with terrorists” and “not a real American”?
A. OMG! You betcha!
Done and done. Now let’s invoice half a million.
very lost said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:39
I can’t remember what this thread is about.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:43
942th
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:44
Also, contingent fee waivers. A sign of truly ethical behaviour.
a warning said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:44
We are approaching PEAK THREAD
chimpevil said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:45
“The enemy of my anemone is my frond.” OK I know the fishy puns on this thread were like last week, but I was gonna post it when the trollish creatures were yelling at each other somewhere up there. Always fucking late, even on a neverending thread.
Snorghagen said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:49
Ultimately, all threads are about POOP.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:49
I think it has something to do with production. We must produce a 1000 comments or else. We should form a union and ask for double pay and overtime.
Bitter Scribe said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:51
That “she has to pay $500,000 for being investigated” stuff seems ridiculous to me.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:52
This thread lacks penis so, PENIS!
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health/researchers-create-working-penises-for-rabbits-from-cells/article1358365/
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:53
So if she’s so dumb she signed off on being responsible for her own vetting, didn’t know who was paying for the clothes, couldn’t hack it with that Big Meany Katie Couric, and had the idea that it would be cool if the losing VP candidate got to speak on Election Night, just how good a candidate is she?
Seems like by airing all her petty grievances about how all those meanies in Big Politics and Media flimflammed her, she’s pretty much pointing out she’s not qualified.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:54
The Fraternity of Meth-Addled Hamsters have a fair bit of clout with S,N! management, ever since their militancy during the last strike. Don’t know if they admit commentors.
tigrismus said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:54
I think we should seize the means of production.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:55
Incidentally, if Iris, or fake Iris gets 1337 again – I WILL NOT BE AMUSED.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:56
Penis Hummer!
http://www.wired.com/autopia/2009/11/dartz/
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:56
Pour souper demain nous aurons les “moon cakes” au jus.
Dessert: vinegar and Robotussin.
alec said,
November 13, 2009 at 2:59
“Overtime”? “Unions”? For shame. As if the thrill of socialist competition and the rewards it gives the most inspiring squadrons – localvore troll, visit from chief liberal chuckle-wit Keith Olbermann, or even honor of name Sadly No Comment Section “H.L. Mencken” – were not enough.
Boneless Meatloaf said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:00
This thread, vast as it is, has a distressing paucity of Hitler.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:00
TITLE=”Greg Wood? Really?”>PENIS.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:02
Did someone say poop?
http://www.bathroomjokes.com/poop/list.htm
Ghost Poopie
The kind where you feel the Poopie come out, but there’s no poopie in the toilet.
Clean Poopie
The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Wet Poopie
The kind where you wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don’t runie them with a stain.
Second Wave Poopie
The kind that happens when you’re done poopie-ing and you’ve pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize you have to poopie some more.
Turtle Poopie
The kind of poopie that pops out a little and goes back in a few times before it finallly comes out
Pop-a-Vein-in-your-Forehead-Poopie
The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
Lincoln Log Poopie
The kind of Poopie that is so huge you’re afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the plunger.
Gas-sy Poopie
The kind where it’s so noisy, everyone within earshot is giggling!
Drinker Poopie
The kind of Poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It’s most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
Corn Poopie
(Self explanatory)
Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Poop Poopie
The kind where you want to Poopie, but all you do is it on the toilet and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap Poopie
That’s the kind when it hurts so badly coming out, you swear it was leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks Poopie (The Power Dump)
The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your butt cheeks get spashed with water.
Liquid Poopie
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots you of your butt and spashes all over the toilet bowl.
Mexican Poopie
The kind that smells so bad your nose burns.
Upper Class Poopie
The kind of Poopie that doesn’t smell.
The Suprise Poopie
You are not even at the toilet, because you are sure you are about to fart, but, OOPS—a Poopie!
The Dangling Poopie
This Poopie refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poopie-ing. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:02
FYWP!
pedestrian said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:03
That “she has to pay $500,000 for being investigated” stuff seems ridiculous to me.
That’s because it isn’t true
g said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:03
gocart, you could’ve broken that up into separate comments and we’d be farther along.
Smut Clyde said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:04
You Can’t Get Whale-Penis Leather Seats After All
Penis Hummer bummer.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:04
Just as a warning to y’all – I have a PENIS in moderation, which while very slightly NSFW, is not going to get cut. Thus the comment count is going to get bumped up when someone Fetches Yon Worthy Post.
gocart mozart said,
November 13, 2009 at 3:06
Did someone say Kitler?