Teh Internets owes teh Sadlies $19717.3. This is true.
Meanwhile, did you also know that God speaks through earthquakes? And not just any old earthquakes, but ‘multitudinous earthquakes’? And not just any multitudinous earthquakes but ‘present-tense quakes’ that move mountains out of their sockets?
‘Included in the End Times signs are earthquakes,’ reports J. Grant Swank, ‘such as the Earth is experiencing today.’ And also several times in the past, we might add, but plate tectonics is probably just a tool of the Devil.
At any rate, per Swank, earthquakes mark the Second Coming of Jesus, whose ‘holy blood was shed from seven body fountains.’ Counting the legionnaire’s spear wound, the crown of thorns, spikes in each hand and one through the ankles, that still leaves two ‘body fountains,’ so we’re assuming a bloody lip and anal discharge.
Whatever the case, it’s pretty creepy, so we want our $19717.3 up front, no questions asked.
Of equal importance, this oldie but goody:
J. Grant Swank, Jr.
Barack Hussein Obama was stunned in delivering his speech before Congress. When he promised that illegal aliens would not get a penny of his healthcare, someone cried out loudly ‘Liar.’
Everyone heard the word. Nancy Pelosi and Joe Biden looked stunned. Pelosi turned to Biden. Biden lowered his head. Pelosi then scanned to her left trying to decipher who yelped the key term.
Biden then stunned Pelosi. Pelosi cradled his head. Biden gulped the key term. Pelosi straightened her perm. Biden glanced to his right and Pelosi put up a fight. Biden then went to bed. Pelosi showered instead. Kool-Aid is red and pencils are made out of lead.
The Associated Press reported the interruption but did not mention the identity of the town crier.
UPDATE: Still no idea who it was.
I know who that was who gave forth.
Woe Jilson, Mongresscan from Couth Sarolina? Close?
It was the patriot who represents every American who knows the truth. Obama is indeed a liar.
So it was, like, Everywingnut or the collective voice of two million teabaggers crying out in rage or something?
He is so for he is Marxist Muslim. Allah permits Muslims to lie in order to further Islam World Rule. It is a virtue to lie. It makes points for the hereafter. It makes Allah’s heart happy.
Whereas denying health care to poor people makes Jesus’ heart happy. And makes touchdowns for the theretofore. Crucial difference, and you go straight to Hell if you don’t know it.
Obama is surrounded by “czar” liars. He was mentored by Jeremiah Wright liar. He was tutored by liar Louis Farrakhan, Nation of Islam mouthpiece.
Jeremiah Wright should get business cards printed up that say ‘Jeremiah Wright liar’ — no comma. They’re only for people who tell the truth. And hate immigrants, which is the same thing.
What can be expected by an individual who will not produce his actual birth certificate, for instance, when there is such a clamor for just that document.
What can be expected by such an individual is that many more batshit crazy demands will probably come his way.
Scores believe he lies when stating he was born in the U.S.
Scores? Really? And to think, it only takes a bushel of people to pass a Constitutional amendment, give or take a peck. Obama’s presidency is effectively over!
Then show us the certificate, Obama. He refuses. Why? Because Obama lies.
This is also why he is evil and also why he lies.
A left-of-left Congressman, more leftist than Ted Kennedy, Obama has survived in liberalism’s colony by lying.
And by forming an alliance with Biden to vote off Hillary. And winning the Immunity Idol for three straight weeks.
He claims to be Christian, for example, while tramping all over biblical ethics. One cannot be a Christian while applauding abortion. One cannot be a Christian while sanctioning sodomy.
Further, Obama as ‘Christian’ does not know his Bible when telling inquirers during the presidential campaign to read the Sermon on the Mount to find out what Christ said about endorsing homosexual lifestyles. There is nothing whatsoever in Matthew 5-7 that refers to homosexuality.
Which absolutely wasn’t Obama’s point in bringing that up.
Obama played ‘Christian’ during the campaign by sponsoring gospel concerts in the Bible belt. Obama is Muslim; there is no way he agrees with the redemption message sung at those testimonial festivities.
Obama lies. He is not Christian.
A tip for encountering Obama and his identical non-lying twin at a fork in the road, where one path leads to civilization and the other to certain death in the trackless desert — ask either twin: ‘If I were to ask your brother, would he tell me that the path on the right leads to civilization?’ If the answer is ‘no,’ then take that path, if it is ‘yes,’ then take the other path.