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That guy is the worst, Jerry. The worst!
Never let it be said that Reagan’s Children aren’t a clever bunch:
Now before the guy over at the aptly named World O’Crap blog loses his composure–which, if his latest vitriolic rant correctly represents his understanding of normal intellectual discourse, might be a good thing–let me state the obvious.
Those are not Cheetoh stains! But wait, Ryan has more (to say, not stains. Well.):
Although many have claimed that Saddam abandoned his WMD programs after 1991, recent tape recordings demonstrate that, as early as 1995, Saddam had concealed from the UN the true extent of his biological weapons program.
And what was the true extent of his biological weapons program when the US decided to “disarm” him? Somewhere between zero and nil?
A tape from 2000 even records a discussion between Saddam and Iraqi scientists in which the dictator indicates his interests in pursuing a nuclear weapon.
Brad R. is interested* in having sex with Angeline Jolie — should she go out and buy condoms now, or can it wait?
In the tapes, Saddam also talks about his clandestine plasma uranium program, which was probably news to weapons officials at the UN.
Yeah, and why would anyone think for even a second Saddam couldn’t pull that off? Oh:
The plasma separation process (PSP) has been studied as a potentially more efficient uranium-enrichment technique that makes use of the advancing technologies in superconducting magnets and plasma physics. [...] The only countries known to have had serious PSP experimental programs are the United States and France. PSP became a part of DOE’s Advanced Isotope Separation research and development program in 1976, but development was dropped in 1982 when AVLIS was chosen as the advanced technology of choice. The French developed their own version of PSP, which they called RCI. Funding for RCI was drastically reduced in 1986, and the program was suspended around 1990, although RCI is still used for stable isotope separation.
If you need Ryan, he’ll be conducting further experiments in his polyester-Cheetos separation program.
* Theoretically.
Bradrocket adds: My desire to get it on with Angelina Jolie is more than just a theory.
Also, Seb left out the very best part of Ryan’s post (my emphasis):
As I argue in my book, just as Pearl Harbor shaped the collective foreign policy perspective of the “Greatest Generation,” so also has 9/11 shaped the outlook of today’s young generation. The 21st century presents us with new threats–threats we can’t placate with “containment” or tolerate through “peaceful co-existence.” We must, as we have in Afganistan and Iraq, boldly and unwaveringly confront Islamo-fascism and its material and idealogical enablers.
For us young people, there is simply no other viable option.
I assume that means Ryan is going down to his recruiting office right now and enlisting in the armed forces. If not, then that last sentence should read, “For young people whose parents can’t afford the tuition at Hillsdale College, there is simply not other viable option.”
g said,
February 27, 2006 at 21:20
“his latest vitriolic rant ”
OK, well, now I’m convinced that right wingers live in an alternate dimension.
Sarcastic? yes. A put-down? yes. Funny? yes indeed! But “vitriolic” and “ranting?”
It’s kind of like going to the Amazon reviews of Horowitz’s books and seeing his supporters describe the critical reviews as “squealing” and “hysterical” and “spewing hate”. Gee, I thought they were pretty well-reasoned, and more importantly, FUNNY!
Kathleen said,
February 27, 2006 at 21:23
I love it when the wingnuts respond to the snark.
and when they assume S.Z. is a man.
MCH said,
February 27, 2006 at 21:44
“squealing” and “hysterical” and “spewing hate”
In the absence of actual, objectively present squealing, hysterics and hate-spewing (a hate-cano blowing forth an infinity of molten Hate, perhaps?), these accusations become the typical content-free copy that adorns the writings of bullshit apologists everywhere. (Oh yeah: include “bias!” as well.)
Look what arrives in the e-mailbox when a doctor who does research takes on “alternative medicine” (a field that, like conservatism, is 90% crap and 10% possibly-useful): Jeers for Quackwatch. They start out so reasonable, but like conspiracy theorists, Holocaust deniers, and wingnuts, they can’t contain themselves when their false worldview is dashed before their eyes and they are as yet unable to admit that. (They also are great typists.) To wit, from a chiropractor (that’s at least four years of college, you’ll recall):
Subject: LOSERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
YOUR A QUACK,,,,,YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO THE WORLD,,,,,YOU LITTLE BITTER MAN,,,,GO CLIMB IN YOUR HOLE,,,,,I HOPE EVERYONE ON YOUR LIST SUES YOU GOOD. TAKES EVRYTHING YOU GOT YOU PIG.
I love it when people not only type in all caps, but think ellipses are made of commas. Add some ranch to that, buddy?
The rest of the Quackwatch site rocks.
woodrow said,
February 27, 2006 at 21:47
Wanker.
S.Z. is a FemiHottie, not a “guy”.
MCH said,
February 27, 2006 at 21:51
Ooops, the link didn’t work:
http://quackwatch.org/00AboutQuackwatch/comments.html#jeers
Jay Brida said,
February 27, 2006 at 22:37
I ran across this renewed vigor for the WMD argument today at another idiot site. I don’t get it, even the Bushies aren’t trying to gun for that one anymore.
I do love the logic though. Yeah, Hussein got rid of his weapons before the invasion! Which makes you wonder why dicators have weapons anyway — to hide them instead of fighting with them?
What an odd world these people live in.
Hysterical Woman said,
February 27, 2006 at 22:41
s.z. (or Pat as we like to call our friend) does not use hysterical rants. Her style is more calm and sarcastic. In her posts she comes off as more bemused than angry. Oh, and the “World O’Crap is crap!” thing is so unoriginal it has come around the bend to being original, just to become a cliche again.
JiuNoon said,
February 27, 2006 at 22:50
the guy over at the aptly named World O’Crap blog
Oh man! How were they able to make such a winning double-entendre of the name of the blog? Man, whoever picked the name “World O’Crap” must be crawling into a hole after having the hidden meaning of the title exposed so thoroughly through masterful right-wing sarcasm!
Despite the administration’s occasional incompetence in overseeing post-Saddam Iraq, its mistakes do not ultimately diminish from the administration’s original arguments in favor of invasion, which are now as solid as ever.
Even if Saddam was found surrounded by canisters of yellow cake and mustard gas, how would that prove that he has ties with Al Queda? Oh, you meant the OTHER original argument in favor of the war.
Yosef said,
February 27, 2006 at 22:55
What’s this? Saddam had a PSP back in 2000?! I didn’t think Sony even released them before last year!
I guess we know who the real terrorists are: all those people watching movies and playing games on their portable devices.
teh l4m3 said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:03
I want to see Reagan’s Children get served by Jerry’s Kids.
Bring it the fcuk on!!!
Brad R. said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:09
Brad R. is interested* in having sex with Angeline Jolie — should she go out and buy condoms now, or can it wait?
Not theorectically. Am very interested. Wouldn’t want to use condoms (would make sure both of us were tested beforehand, though).
Brad R. said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:12
The reason many people assume that SZ is a man (myself included when I first started reading W’OC) is that men are normally the ones who enjoy brutally taking the piss out of other people.
And yes, I know I’m completely generalizing and being a sexist bastard here, but on the whole I think it’s true.
D. Sidhe said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:24
I think the other reason is that many of them are sexist bastards to begin with. (See: Mike Adams.)
And, Brad, additionally, weren’t you the one who admitted recently that women don’t count, at least in terms of dividing the world into two kinds of people? (Not those-with-dicks and those-with-vaginas, but those-who-want-to-screw-chocolate-cakes and those who don’t.)
I think this merely enhances my point. So to speak.
(Yes, I’m teasing. I got nothing but love for Brad. Mostly nothing. Forget I said anything.)
Brad R. said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:29
And, Brad, additionally, weren’t you the one who admitted recently that women don’t count, at least in terms of dividing the world into two kinds of people?
that was kinda a joke.
But I admit that I find it difficult imagining myself with a vagina.
Lucy said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:32
I don’t think Angelina would want to use condoms, either. After all, it’s been conclusively proven that she likes men named Brad, and that she likes babies. So why wouldn’t she want BradR’sBabies (I advise you to have the name tradmarked in advance of the inevitable new blog-roundup site)?
Brad R. said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:36
After all, it’s been conclusively proven that she likes men named Brad, and that she likes babies. So why wouldn’t she want BradR’sBabies (I advise you to have the name tradmarked in advance of the inevitable new blog-roundup site)?
That’d be pretty sweet. Then she could pay ME child support!!!!11!1 LMFAO!11!11!
Lucy said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:39
I forgot what we were talking about. Oh, Saddam. And s.z. For what it’s worth, accusations of hate spewing, vitriol, hysteria, etc., seem to be par for the course when a winger is confronted with an expert, dispassionate, yet funny evisceration such as those in which s.z.’s World O’ Crap specializes. I don’t know why; maybe it’s all they’ve got (discredit the messenger, a primo right-wing tactic), or maybe they’re . . . projecting? After all, to the man who has only a hammer, the whole world looks like a nail.
Brad R. said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:41
Oh, Saddam. And s.z. For what it’s worth, accusations of hate spewing, vitriol, hysteria, etc., seem to be par for the course when a winger is confronted with an expert, dispassionate, yet funny evisceration such as those in which s.z.’s World O’ Crap specializes.
Yeah, no kidding. World O’Crap is consistantly hilarious. It’s mean-spirited, sure, but so are we. And honestly, the best humor generally is.
g said,
February 27, 2006 at 23:41
MCH, thanks for picking up on my comment re: spew, hate, and hysteria.
And doesn’t it seem like there must be a “Style Manual for Wingnuts” out there that these people all have? Cuz they all write the same.
I vote for a moratorium on the verb “spew”.
Lucy said,
February 28, 2006 at 0:32
Oh, man, I just had so much fun over at the ReaganBabies site.
teh l4m3 said,
February 28, 2006 at 0:51
Nice. Bradrocket capitalizes on my comment at ReaganCrotchlings.
Killer said,
February 28, 2006 at 0:54
I say from now on “spew” refers to the acronim “Society for the Promotion of Elvish Welfare”
Brad R. said,
February 28, 2006 at 0:54
ReaganCrotchlings
How about BonzoCrotchlings? Or Gipper’s Groin Spawns? I think you’ve got the right idea, at any rate.
LA Confidential Pantload said,
February 28, 2006 at 1:11
But..but..they’re so young. So very young..and so much wanking…
Geez, by now these bozos have more hair on their palms than they do on their chins….
tigrismus said,
February 28, 2006 at 1:36
I see s.z.’s got some “tutoring” to do on these folks.
Anne said,
February 28, 2006 at 2:04
s.z.’s style is so far from vitriolic and ranty that the guy just makes himself more ludicrous by trying to claim otherwise.
One wonders if he’ll see this post and attempt to make some sort of “Sadly, No!” joke.
erquirk said,
February 28, 2006 at 2:20
Hey, I don’t want to imagine Brad R. with a vagina, either!!!
Clif said,
February 28, 2006 at 3:05
I did a little more research on Ryan which you can find here.
You guys and s.z. always find the best wingnuts!
pessullivan said,
February 28, 2006 at 3:56
Let’s see the US gave up plasma technology 24 years ago and France gave it up 16 years ago. And they had been working for 30 years. HMM, think Saddam or any other country has the capital to waste on that type of program?
But thankfully they didn’t give it up completely because I love my plasma TV!
teh l4m3 said,
February 28, 2006 at 4:07
“How about BonzoCrotchlings? Or Gipper’s Groin Spawns?”
Naptime Nuggets? Jelly Belly Beanie Babies? Supply-Side Sin-Fruit? Iran/Contra Onyocks?
Is “Bratz Easton Ellis” too much of a stretch? Yeah, probably…
bertrand said,
February 28, 2006 at 4:10
Ehm, Clif, i believe that is the wrong ryan walsh…
verplanck colvin said,
February 28, 2006 at 4:17
Oh, this place could be fun for awhile. These folks are dense. Now they’re conflating abortions with the Holocaust and everything. Except that he means birth control. I think. I’m not sure, my brains are starting to ooze.
FlipYrWhig said,
February 28, 2006 at 4:47
But I admit that I find it difficult imagining myself with a vagina.
I’ve had months like that.
Oh, you mean on your OWN body. Instead of…
Carry on then.
Marq said,
February 28, 2006 at 5:17
For some reason, I am now picturing the following scene:
Angelina Jolie lays there, naked but for the strategically placed slice of chocolate cake covering her nether regions. The door opens, and it’s our hero, Brad R.! “Take me,” Angelina whispers huskily. Barely batting an eye, Brad R. tears his clothes off as he hurls himself towar the bed (and Angelina! and, the cake!)….
OK, that’s where I black out, due to an unholy panic.
Dan Someone said,
February 28, 2006 at 5:49
Didn’t Angelina Jolie just adopt another kid from the nether regions?
Clif said,
February 28, 2006 at 5:50
Apparently I’ve maligned a Hillsdale student Ryan Walsh,who is also an actor, by comparing him to another Ryan Walsh at Hillsdale, who is also a chickenhawk. My apologies to the actor for calling him a chickenhawk, even though it is only the chickenhawk who is complaining that I’ve accused him of being an actor.
D. Sidhe said,
February 28, 2006 at 14:52
But I admit that I find it difficult imagining myself with a vagina.
I don’t.
(Was that uncalled-for?)
Otto Man said,
February 28, 2006 at 15:59
I want to see Reagan’s Children get served by Jerry’s Kids.
Christ, I nearly choked on my oatmeal there. Well played.
Lucy said,
February 28, 2006 at 17:22
Okay, does anyone here want to take credit for the comment about Saddam’s pony over at the Crotchlings site? Because that is the cutest damned thing I have read in, like, forever.
dAVE said,
March 1, 2006 at 1:11
One of my favorite misuses of a word is when people write about someone “spewing your hate and vile!”
Of course, they mean “bile”
I dunno, I just think it’s funny. Maybe ’cause it makes my brain wait for the noun that should come next - then I realize that the writer is using “vile” as a noun. It’s just so darn cute.
Marq said,
March 1, 2006 at 7:01
Wait, the Crotchlings allow comments?!? Well–!
So young.
So naive.