Comments on: Ooo Eee, Ooo Ah Ah

By: Scott

Scott — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 16:38:06 +0000

Not only *literally* laughing his ass off (clunk! who’s cleaning *that* off the 7-11 floor?) …

But also: “…there’s a ‘brown’ fellow with terrible English due his accent at the register.”

Yes, just *terrible* English.

By: St. Bina, Queen of Sheba

St. Bina, Queen of Sheba — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 17:55:04 +0000

I wouldn’t give Dan Riehl the time of day if he asked me nicely. Not because I’m whiter than he (which I probably am, unless he’s an albino), but because he’s just plain patronizing and dumber than sailor’s shit.

By: Hysterical Woman

Hysterical Woman — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:48:40 +0000

The only way a white person can be racists is if they immediately shoot any brown person they see. This does not apply to the police.

By: actor212

actor212 — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 15:36:30 +0000

You know, I work at an airport and I’ve never seen a black jet.

There’s a couple dozen on that football team!!!!! Why are you saying they’e racist in the NFL????

By: kingubu

kingubu — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 14:25:41 +0000

I will pass along your dismay at his absence.

Thanks, Lady Doctor Missus. Yeah, I’m sure things are completely crazy at Maison d’M, right now. If you pass along anything at all, just let Gavin know that we noticed he was missing.

By: Megan

Megan — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 14:14:53 +0000

So he’s not a racist because he’s man enough to admit publicly that some dark-skinned foreigners were nice to him? What would he have done if he WERE a racist, called the INS on them after they gave him directions?

By: Ludwig "Crazy-hair" Wittgenstein

Ludwig "Crazy-hair" Wittgenstein — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 13:52:10 +0000

If a God could speak, we would not be able to understand him.

By: address my envelope, lips!

address my envelope, lips! — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 13:42:48 +0000

Yes, I, a personage of the female persuasion, will totally stop and walk over to strange men in cars who ask me for directions, because I have no sense of self preservation, and any woman who does not do the same is showing remarkable selfishness about valuing their personal safety over the directional needs of a creepy guy who resembles the Green River Killer.

Anyway, as far as I can tell from trying to read his excruciating kindergarten-level writing, she *did* give him directions, and pretty good ones for DC, where the standard direction giving is “you know where the Smithsonian is? Well, don’t go that way”.

I assume if I can’t understand someone that *my* comprehension skills are lacking, but then, I’m not a racist asshole. I did get lost in Northeast DC once, when I was newer to the place, but the nice people that gave me directions were very patient and friendly, and did not steal my purse for crack, or whatever it is that wingnuts think black urbanites do when not serving as objects of their derision.

By: zombie rotten mcdonald

zombie rotten mcdonald — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 13:39:56 +0000

What language does God speak?

I visualized the end of that Priceline commercial:

“The language…. of the Deal”

Shatner is Gawd!!

By: actor212

actor212 — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 12:59:28 +0000

What language does God speak?

The language of luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuv….

By: TLV

TLV — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 12:59:08 +0000

My comment was to that Dan fella’ – naturally.

By: TLV

TLV — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 12:48:33 +0000

What language does God speak? If he/she spoke and you could not understand, would you make fun then too?

By: justme

justme — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 08:09:16 +0000

Or do you just put them all in a box labelled “darker than me”?

Clearly, he has two boxes. One labeled "Darker than me" and one labeled "Darker than him, so dark that the fellow in box #1 and I can both laugh at him."

By: Marco

Marco — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 07:55:20 +0000

Why would a woman of any color look down upon Dan. Is it because he’s accosting her in a parking lot and looks one fake arm cast short of being Bundy 2009?

Just asking.

By: he flips

he flips — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 06:22:11 +0000

All of a sudden I’m imagining Rex Ryan signing Vick. Why is that?

By: M. Bouffant

M. Bouffant — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 05:57:01 +0000

The Black Jets: You thought the black helicopters were a-scary!

By: he flips

he flips — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 04:25:58 +0000

You know, I work at an airport and I’ve never seen a black jet. Jet is a geological material and is considered to be a minor gemstone...The adjective jet-black is better-known perhaps than the substance from which the descriptive phrase derives. I did not know that.

By: he flips

he flips — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 04:15:55 +0000

His village was Fairfax, but the bar was in Arlington. He was born in Africa but his parents faked a birth certificate so he could live here. The parrot is a common site in Fairfax. I’m surprised you didn’t know the style originated there. I thought that was implied.

And no the end tables, or Värdelös Trä, were never on sale. They just made the price sign bigger as if it was a good price.

By: tincture

tincture — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 03:40:47 +0000

I’m confused. he flips, was the bar in the African parrot fancier’s village or not? If it was, was the IKEA in the same village or somewhere else? Also did the man ever find the IKEA he was looking for and did they still have those end tables on sale?

By: Sirius Lunacy

Sirius Lunacy — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 03:38:15 +0000

“jet black”*
*Not, oddly enough, “coal” or “ink/inky” black. Heh.

You know, I work at an airport and I’ve never seen a black jet.