Jun
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A Defecated Follower Of Fashion
Ann “Babe” Huggett, RenewAmerica:
Michelle Obama: First Lady of fashion victims
June 11, 2009
Above: Hello, mens!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Lady Doctor Missus Marita said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:22
Wow. The glass house that the lady in the cheetah print blouse lives in sure looks nice.
Huh. I wonder what she’s doing with those stones…
Julie O. said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:25
She?
OMG, I thought that was Eddie Izzard.
Wait, Eddie is much more stylish.
der svedish chef said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:26
Vheele-a U.S. Preseedent, Bereck Oobema, is beck frum epulugeezing tu oooor inemeees fur Emereeca’s ixeestence-a, Furst Ledy, Meechelle-a Oobema, tuoored Lundun’s Vestmeenster Ebbey oon Tooesdey in un ooootffeet su ooootlundeeshly seelly thet it eppeered she-a vunted tu gu thet oone-a step foorzeer und huld up Emereeca es un oobject ooff reedicoole-a. Zee Droodge-a Repurt hes a crupped peectoore-a ooff her in a cheeldish und unfflettereeng bereebbuned und 3-D flooered tooneec neepped in et zee veeest veet a bleck checked belt, tupped veet tvu sveeters und veereeng vhet cun oonly be-a descreebed es a retru-nud tu 80′s tepered punts. Under thees peectoore-a ooff a fesheeun deesester oon zee huuff ere-a sooch glereeng heedleene-a leenks es Lundun Shuck Fesheeun und Meechelle-a und zee Oorunge-a Sneke-a.
Bork Bork Bork!
Righteous Bubba said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:30
Peter Kirsanow’s moustache would go well here.
Brandi said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:34
Eddie has a more well-proportioned nose. (Seriously, she comes perilously close to looking like those horrible old cariacatures of Irish people from the 19th century.)
kc said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:36
Yikes. That was a rather unfortunate fashion choice on Michelle’s part. Normally, she looks fab, but even she can’t pull off the orange-frill-around-the-hips look.
pedestrian said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:46
It looks like a tribute to London in the swinging 60s. It’s cute, colorful and fun, but it does make her hips look big. I kan hz gay card back?
islmfaoscist said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:48
Triceps envy is an ugly, ugly thing.
g said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:51
Can’t follow the link till later, but with that outfit, she’s criticizim Michelle Obama?
Tropical Fats said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:52
What an ugly human being, in every sense.
Sophist FCD said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:52
…what.
Seriously, what the hell is she trying to communicate here, besides “Obama am bad bad bad”? Michelle one made a joke about fixing world hunger, therefore Hitler? Somebody help me out here.
Another jim said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:52
Michelle = developed triceps. Hugget = undeveloped triceratops?
Jennifer said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:53
Hey, I figured out what the “Babe” refers to.
Remember that movie about the pig? The pig was named “Babe”, but in the pig’s defense, it was cute. Unlike this “Babe”.
islmfaoscist said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:56
Good writers use a wry concluding joke to emphasize the seriousness of their main point.
pedestrian said,
June 13, 2009 at 1:56
while she was at it, she should have worn some big white boots – you know, give us somewhere else to look.
Jennifer said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:10
You know, it really is eerie how like a prednisone-swollen version of Eddie Izzard she looks in that photo. Though I agree with Julie O.: Eddie is much more stylish.
El Cid said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:14
Vrom deh vebsite:
Man, you know I’m tuning in for that!!!
Righteous Bubba said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:21
Somehow I don’t believe the “knocked-up daughter” wailing is really a selling point for Palin.
DrDick said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:26
Oh goody! Fashion advice from the budget trailer court. Rosanne would be so proud.
Daphne Chyprious said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:51
So which month does she represent on the Hot Conservative Women calendar?
Molly Ivins said,
June 13, 2009 at 2:52
I’ll tell you one thing for goldurned sure is that this whole goshdurned column is a hornswoggle and a boondoggle and a rootin’ tootin’ (just put the latte over there, Maria, and then you can go home. be back in the morning at 6 sharp, you need to set the breakfast table) and woooo-hooooo these Rightwingers sure is crazier ‘en a whole goshdurned prairie dog town on LSD, wa-hoo.
PeeJ said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:00
Getting fashion tips from Babe Hoggett er, Huggett is like getting culinary tips from Jeffrey Dahmer.
wiley said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:11
More than 1100 words in tantrum over a top?. She would have to make a movie to review one.
I’d rather wear that unfortunate shirt than read all that frothy wingnut belly-achery over a garment. What’s wrong with these people?
mextremist said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:19
that’s the shortest “shorter” piece evar.
Just Alison said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:25
Whether he’s taking stock of Michelle’s shoes
Do the Obamas then have a stocktake sale?
or insultingly displaying the soles of his shoes as his feet are propped up on his desk during an Oval Office photo op of him talking on the phone to Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu,
Take zat, you despicable Israeli pig dog!
Obama is a man without a plan when it comes to world events.
Mebbes he gets his instructions from Gahd. Like the last incumbent.
He is all about show on the domestic front and world stage without the attention to vitally important detail that is necessary for an effective leader in an increasingly hostile and dangerous world.
I must have missed the numerous occasions on which Obama launched into a quick tap routine while at the podium. Although I have seen him do the “Watchthiswatchthiswatchthis!” routine to astound travellers on overnight bus trips.
Even the President’s wife can dismiss him with a trivialization reference to world hunger as he roots through her wardrobe.
Obama’s a cross-dresser? Who knew?
Such shallowness on both their parts ultimately makes us all fashion victims.
Excusing moi, missy, but who’s got the impressive law degrees here? T’ain’t you, I’m guessing, and I know for sure it ain’t me. That just leaves a couple of O-fashion-victims.
And getting a law degree is not like getting spot on a wingnut blog, and thank FSM for that, else we’d be in very deep shit indeed.
Mister DNA said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:25
I’m looking forward to Ann “Babe” Huggett’s next article, Tommy “Tiny” Lister: Master of the Ironic Nickname.
Pere Ubu said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:33
insultingly displaying the soles of his shoes as his feet are propped up on his desk during an Oval Office photo op of him talking on the phone to Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu
*sigh*
Let me guess – if the Boy King Bush had done that, Ann would have been gushing over how casual and average it made him, and how it linked him to the Great Common American Man and Walt Whitman and Sandburg and suchlike that there.
Just Alison said,
June 13, 2009 at 3:43
Oh and I appreciate the Kinks reference: I still have that song on vinyl, sitting somewhere in my top cupboards. Bless ‘em. Ray Davies was a potful of sex with sugar on top.
In fact, here’s the very thing from youtube: Dedicated Follower of Fashion.
And since we’re strolling down memory lane, here also is Apeman and the classic Lola. Oh, the glory days of my yoof.
Grace Nearing said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:02
Babe, Babe, Babe — you gotta stop buying Home Shopping Network closeouts at three in the morning just because they come in size 4X, are made with fungus-resistant material, and feature “extra-comfy” elastic waistbands.
SomeNYGuy said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:06
OMG, I thought that was Eddie Izzard.
Are you kidding? Babe looks like like she swallowed Eddie Izzard. And then went back for seconds.
SomeNYGuy said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:08
So … Babe is a Muslim?
kingubu said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:14
Babe looks like like she swallowed Eddie Izzard.
I don’t recall hearing Eddie complain about it, either. Just saying…
Sheesh said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:16
Hey SNYG,
If you do a Google for ["Ann Huggett" muslim] **With the brackets for extra certainty** you’ll notice that the MSM isn’t reporting on this issue, therefor is must be true!!
(Note the results are all Freep and Twitter and such.)
Sheesh said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:16
Er, therefore. Also.
SomeNYGuy said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:18
I don’t recall hearing Eddie complain about it, either.
How could you hear him from inside that beast? Unless she opened her mouth really wide…
Monstro the whale, IIRmyDisneycharactersC.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:24
Babe looks like like she swallowed Eddie Izzard.
I know an old lady who swallowed an Izzard
Which wriggled and squiggled around in her gizzard.
She swallowed the Izzard to catch the lizard…
etc. etc.
Robt Ludlum's The Szslakian Szyzygy said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:32
okay, i’ll admit it, I don’t get the fauxtrage about Barack having his feet up on his own desk in his own office while talking on the telephone. Isn’t that what an office is for? And I don’t get the frothing anger against Michele’s clothing. I mean frothing, jowl-shaking anger by these supposedly “worldly women”. I don’t get it.
M. Bouffant said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:37
Re-posting post that disappeared (never as good when you have to remember & re-type them):
Babe the Blue Ox there looks like a victim of life. Fashion victimization extra & self-inflicted.
Why does the horrid, hateful, non-existent gawd of the wing-nuts make all his most faithful so fat, ugly & stupid?
And we see that Gavin has referenced his footnote of this morning: Lots of “string-theorying” going on around Babe’s head there.
Now admit Dr. Strange is Ditko, not Kirby, so we can get back to arguing about Todd Palin raping Letterman’s cows or whatever the subject is.
SqueakyRat said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:42
This human baked potato mocks Michelle for being “pear-shaped.”
M. Bouffant said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:47
Robt Ludlum’s The Szslakian Szyzygy just doesn’t get it.
This answer might be worth making a macro of, because it’s really is hard to get, & the question will be asked again &again:
“He’s a Negro, a colored Gentleman, a minority group member, not even a dirty Mediterranean-type white person, let alone of the noble Scotch/English/Irish types who have comprised 95% of our Preznits.”
And, of course, he used some zombie powder voo-doo to pull the wool over our eyes & hoodwink us into voting for him. It must have been mass media hypnosis. He’s not legitimate. he just can’t be!!
In short, there’s not a reasonable answer to be had to your question.
Smut Clyde said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:56
The glass house that the lady in the cheetah print blouse lives in sure looks nice.
People who live in glass houses should definitely not say ‘Jehovah’.
Spiny Norman said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:56
Ann Huggett is a fashion victim, in several senses. I pity her.
Mole on Gary Ruppert's ass said,
June 13, 2009 at 4:56
Can someone photoshop a pig-nose onto “Babe”?
It would look so perfect, but my skills are weak.
Willy said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:14
So which month does she represent on the Hot Conservative Women calendar?
Smarch.
Bitter Scribe, who digs deep & analyzes the news with his usual insightful and historical approach all the while being as politically irreverent as possible, said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:16
Does Sadly, No! have some version of Photoshop with an “add rosacea” function?
Anyway, her calling M.O. “pear-shaped” is the beachball calling the fruit round.
Lesley said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:26
Since she leads with Barack Obama is back from apologizing to our enemies for America’s existence, one can be fairly certain she will not follow with a constructive objective critique of Michelle’s dress choice.
PeeJ said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:27
I don’t get the fauxtrage about Barack having his feet up on his own desk in his own office while talking on the telephone. Isn’t that what an office is for?
NO. And don’t you dare show up without a tie, either. Even if it’s a clip-on. That would be unconstituionaml and aid and abet our enemies. Who, may I remind you, all have DARK SKIN JUST LIKE SOMEONE ELSE I’M NOT SAYING WHO.
And I don’t get the frothing anger against Michele’s clothing. I mean frothing, jowl-shaking anger by these supposedly “worldly women”. I don’t get it.
She so desperately needs a few gay men to help her out. It’s tragic, really, the way the trailer trash WalMart fashonistes have gotten even fifteen seconds much less all the whing time they do get. The gurl could use a couple,….., um tips, know what I mean?
Lesley said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:28
Does Sadly, No! have some version of Photoshop with an “add rosacea” function?
That filter costs extra, and you won’t find it in Alien Skin’s “Eye Candy” line.
Lesley said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:35
Bush Feet Desk
PeeJ said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:38
Bush Feet Desk
But….BUT…BUT..CLENIS!
SomeNYGuy said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:44
Can someone photoshop a pig-nose onto “Babe”?
We have referred your request to the Department Bureau Agency of Superfluous Redundancies.
Righteous Bubba said,
June 13, 2009 at 5:48
George W. Bush, like all liberals, does not know or follow office protocols.
Nom de Plume said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:01
Says Ann Huggett:
Alright, all you conservative fashionistas out there;
“Out there”? Doesn’t she mean “in there”?
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:15
George W. Bush, like all liberals, does not know or follow office protocols.
Dude, it’s Friday (or at least it still is where I’m sitting). That means Bush is a conservative.
Lesley said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:16
George W. Bush, like all liberals, does not know or follow office protocols.
Conservatives praised and admired His rebel qualities.
g said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:29
Ok, finally got home from the Factory and can visit sites.
I spent about 20 minutes crafting a point by point rebuttal of Babe’s article. And then I looked at Babe’s photo.
I deleted it. There is nothing more to be said.
Can I get another round here?
PeeJ said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:41
If ONLY you could you delete Babe’s photo from the interducks. Forever. Oh, you meant your comment. Sorry. I’ll go attend to my duck confit now.
A Squirrel said,
June 13, 2009 at 6:46
Nothing of substance to add…someone just had to throw props for that Kinks reference up in here
commie atheist said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:05
Can I get another round here?
Pitcher of Margaritas, coming right up.
Knights in White Satin said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:26
“add rosacea”? Well, here are a couple of suggestions:
“Paint Daubs” filter: “Light Rough” although “Sparkle” could be fun.
Add red, of course
OR the “Sponge” filter, reddened. Then play around with the “Distort” filter.
I may find a photo of a pig-snout to place on this lady’s face, but I fear it would actually be an improvement.
a different brad said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:29
She is not Eddie Izzard, folks.
Benny Hill.
Totally Heterosexual said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:36
I would fuck Benny Hill before I’d lay a finger on Ms Huggett. And yes, I am taking into consideration the fact that Hill has been dead and decomposing for several years.
Smut Clyde said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:39
The cut of Ms Huggett’s cheetah-skin top is completely irrational. That makes her a Dedekinded follower of fashion.
St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,
June 13, 2009 at 7:52
Well, the fauxtrage is very simple.
See, these are the same ass-goblins what swooned over the idea that Reagan never even took off his (forgotten-he-had-it-on) jacket whilst in the confines of the Oval Office. So if anyone actually treats it as an *office* that they’ll be stuck in for the next four years or more, why sacrilege, blasphemy, heresy!
As you can see, it’s more Reaganite-image bullshit.
he flips said,
June 13, 2009 at 8:41
Can never have enough yakety sax
justme said,
June 13, 2009 at 10:20
“Babe” has something of a self-awareness deficit if she thinks she has any place referring to anything or anyone else as a “disaster on the hoof”.
Lesley, from your link, this kind of made my day,
Perhaps Pappy was jumping out of a perfectly good airplane hoping for a chute failure and an honorable death.
Just Alison said,
June 13, 2009 at 10:40
A Dada kind of Fulleroo of fashion? (A billion dollars to anyone who spots the ref).
Australian dollars? Oh, well, not worth bothering really.
M. Bouffant said,
June 13, 2009 at 10:55
Uh, Buckminster Fuller? Fuller Brush?
59 Les Paul Copy said,
June 13, 2009 at 14:23
Finally, someone online mentioned the name of my band, the Snappy Acronyms. Haz record deal forthcoming?
lobbey said,
June 13, 2009 at 14:54
completely off topic, did someone mention that they were playing EVE, or was it a dream I had?
Gabriel Ratchet said,
June 13, 2009 at 14:54
So what does your family do?”
“Well, both my grandfathers had covert dealings with the Nazis during WW2 and one of them tried to organize a fascist coup against the US government; my father bailed out of his plane during combat and left his crewmates to die, then later conspired to sell arms to a country that was technically our enemy in order to finance death squads in Central America, then avoided prosecution by pardoning anyone who could have given evidence against him; one of my brothers looted a major savings and loan institution while another helped rig an election to make me president; my mother sneered at disaster refugees and dead servicemen, my wife “accidentally” ran over her ex, and my daughters’ drunken antics got them thrown out of Argentina; meanwhile I dodged the draft, drove every business I’ve ever been involved in into the ground, spent my time as governor signing death warrants and playing video golf, ran up more debt than any other president in history, lied the country into an unnecessary war that left hundreds of thousands dead, let an entire city drown, legitimized torture and illegal spying, and stocked every possible level of government with incompetent hacks, toadies, and ideologues, the better to enrich my cronies.”
“What do you call yourselves?”
“The Aristocrats!”
Pere Ubu said,
June 13, 2009 at 14:58
OMFG that face is no easier to confront in the harsh light of morning.
I KAN HAZ NEW TRED PLZ KTHX
59 Les Paul Copy said,
June 13, 2009 at 15:19
G. Ratchet, I believe we have a winner. But, still, Clinton, etc.
El Cid said,
June 13, 2009 at 15:42
As sure as eggs is eggs.
PopeRatzo said,
June 13, 2009 at 15:54
She looks like Devine’s little “sister”.
Here’s a joke:
Q: What do you do if you’re stuck on an elevator with a gun, three bullets and “Babe” Huggett?
A: Shoot yourself in the head three times.
Dr. BDH said,
June 13, 2009 at 16:04
His supporters—the few that remain—point out that this was a presidency knocked sideways by the terrorist attacks of September 11th 2001, which no one foresaw.
Bullshit!
The Economist (which endorsed Bush in 2000) can go fuck itself. The attacks were foreseen and Bush did nothing to stop them. I am sick and tired of the ceaseless rewriting of history to airbrush out Bush’s responsibility for 9/11. If he’d paid attention — and if Condi had listened to Clarke — he might have done something. It’s convenient to say the attacks couldn’t have been prevented, but we’ll never know what a competent President might have done with same CIA information that Bush ignored. Bush’s incompetence didn’t start with the Iraq war, it started in January of 2001 and never let up.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
June 13, 2009 at 16:20
…this was a presidency knocked sideways by the terrorist attacks of September 11th 2001…
Yeah, knocked sideways – LIKE A FOX!
Srsly, Gee Dumbya said it himself – 9/11 was the trifecta for him. I agree that it was more likely incompetence than malice that let the attacks go ahead, but the administration’s response to them was a total disgrace.
Anonymous said,
June 13, 2009 at 18:08
I is late for the party, but obviously you’ve misspelled “Fascism” in the title of your blog post there.
Carry on.
pedestrian said,
June 13, 2009 at 18:11
“What do you call yourselves?”
“The Aristocrats!”
Winz
zombie rotten mcdonald said,
June 13, 2009 at 18:16
The Molly Ivins parody troll proves one thing:
Talentless asswipes can’t match the Real Molly’s writing.
PeeJ said,
June 13, 2009 at 18:42
I have no idea how many new threads are going but I have to add to this one. I hereby award one internets to Gabriel Ratchet.
Andy said,
June 13, 2009 at 20:00
“So which month does she represent on the Hot Conservative Women calendar?”
March, April, and part of May.
justme said,
June 13, 2009 at 20:04
Exceptional, Mr. Ratchet. Simply exceptional.
SomeNYGuy said,
June 13, 2009 at 20:32
Must add my late but wholehearted praise for G. Ratchet’s masterpiece. I’m forwarding it far and wide.
GoatBoy said,
June 13, 2009 at 20:43
I wouldn’t Hugget with rented arms.
Knights in White Satin said,
June 13, 2009 at 22:47
Mr Ratchet, I commend you. Five -no ten!- gold stars for you! I, too, am forwarding your screed to friends.
Greg L said,
June 13, 2009 at 23:11
Damnit all to hell! I clicked on the goddamn link. Now my eyes need bleaching.
Barney said,
June 14, 2009 at 1:49
As sure as eggs is eggs.
That’s why Obama’s using the desk – Aching Men’s Feet.
Just Alison said,
June 14, 2009 at 1:56
M. Bouffant, Folleroo is a dog mentioned in a poem from the post-apocalyptic novel Riddley Walker, by Russell Hoban. Here‘s a blog post including the poem.
For what it’s worth, Riddley Walker is one of the most powerful books I’ve ever read – every time I read it I’m dumped into another world, and it keeps coming back to haunt me. Highly recommended reading.
tigrismus said,
June 14, 2009 at 15:43
We are talking about a “what’s-bred-in-bone-comes-out-in-face” pear-shaped woman with excruciatingly average-to-bad taste in desperate need of an apolitical professional stylist
The apple-shaped lady photographed wearing an all-over leopard print top with a deep v-neck questions Obama’s breeding based on her body-shape and being photographed in an unfortunate outfit– I, um… wow.
Andrew A. Gill, SLS said,
June 15, 2009 at 19:31
I heard him say that everything is really soft and the temperature is quite comfortable.
Given A Choice Between Cake Or Death, The Rainbow Batman Chooses Death--Kidding, Just Kidding! I'll Have Cake, Please said,
June 15, 2009 at 21:26
Good grief. What can I say about her that hasn’t been already, here? I suspect that her relationship status rhymes with “swag flag”, let’s leave it at that.