May
5

Joe The Plumber’s Phone Is Ringing




Posted at 9:37 by Gavin M.

Erick Erickson, RedState:
Palin Is In

For those who were questioning the National Council for New America based on who was not on board, one of the names of those not on board has been Sarah Palin. She is now on board.

If you can imagine the part of a parade with the Shriners in fezzes driving miniature cars, that’s the National Council for a New America — except instead of fezzes it’s ignominy, and also ignominy instead of miniature cars.

Another way to see it would be as The Five Doctors, but instead of the first five guys who played Dr. Who, you hear that familiar scrapey, sireney sound, and out of a materialized Port-a-San comes Haley Barbour, Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, John McCain, and Mitt Romney.

Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teaching tour.

Americans think we’ve gone nuts. Let’s tell Americans to shut up and send our failed candidates out to lecture them.

Keep it up like this, Agent Erickson, and you will surely have a dacha and an automobile after the Great Redistribution.

377 Comments »

  1. sarah said,

    May 5, 2009 at 9:45

    For those who were questioning the National Council for New America based on who was not on board, one of the names of those not on board has been Sarah Palin.

    is it a crazy republican thing that sentences have to be awkward and repetitive? this is bordering on a bushism.

  2. JGabriel said,

    May 5, 2009 at 9:48

    Gavin M.:

    If you can imagine the part of a parade with the Shriners in fezzes driving miniature cars, that’s the National Council for a New America — except instead of fezzes it’s ignominy, and also ignominy instead of miniature cars.

    I’m guessing that makes Palin captain of the booth babes at the Shriner’s convention, except instead of booth babes ignominy?

    And for some reason, whenever I see the words ‘ignominy’ and ‘Republicans’ in close proximity, it always makes me think of hominy grits.

    .

  3. JGabriel said,

    May 5, 2009 at 9:51

    sarah:

    is it a crazy republican thing that sentences have to be awkward and repetitive?

    No, it’s a stupidity thing, though granted, there’s an enormous amount of overlap.

    .

  4. joestork said,

    May 5, 2009 at 9:54

    Dacha… nice.

    Is that really what Rush said? Sweet suffering Jesus.

    Also, just had a look at Steele’s recent comments about moderate Republicans having a “seat at the table” so long as they keep their damn traps shut (I paraphrase).

    What a stupid, bogus party. I mean, really just the worst. And they’d been riding so high for so long… just seemed like it’d be that way forever. Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.

    Not even my dirtiest, sexiest West Wing Democrat fantasies could have prepared me for these times.

  5. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 9:58

    Hmmm, ignomnomnominy.

  6. JGabriel said,

    May 5, 2009 at 10:05

    joestork:

    What a stupid, bogus party. I mean, really just the worst. And they’d been riding so high for so long… just seemed like it’d be that way forever. Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.

    Right? It’s like the country suddenly and inexplicably went sane. Although there are still some who act like the GOP only went nuts in the last half-decade, I’m shocked by the number who will now, finally, admit that the Republicans have been crazy for at least the last 30-40 years.

    .

  7. Wyatt Watts III said,

    May 5, 2009 at 10:06

    Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teaching tour

    …of the Dominican Republic.

  8. JGabriel said,

    May 5, 2009 at 10:24

    Remember, Republicans learn more from listening to Rush Limbaugh than they learn in school – things like how to grind and snort Oxycontin.

    .

  9. Another Kiwi said,

    May 5, 2009 at 10:41

    The new GOP now with more ignominy.

  10. Funkula said,

    May 5, 2009 at 11:11

    Where have you gone, Sam Wurzelbacher
    A nation turns its squinty eyes to you

  11. Grace Nearing said,

    May 5, 2009 at 11:33

    Well at least the on-boarding of Sarah Palin reduces the quotient of scrotal sag somewhat.

  12. Ted the Slacker said,

    May 5, 2009 at 11:45

    Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teachingbagging tour.

    fizt.

  13. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:00

    Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.

    And yet the light remains out for Dave Broder, Fred Hiatt, and company.

  14. owlbear1 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:06

    National Council for New America

    Newest Council of American Nationalists

    Ahh, that’s better…

  15. M. Bouffant said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:27

    Relevant web log pimping:

    More on the NCNA.

  16. Gary Ruppert said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:35

    The fact is, the biased media and your liberal brainwashing insures you liberals believe things about USA that are not true. Truth is, we are about God and Freedom, and we do not like class war and homosexuality

  17. N__B said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:54

    Well at least the on water-boarding of Sarah Palin reduces the quotient of scrotal sag inane statements somewhat.

  18. Lady Arky said,

    May 5, 2009 at 12:56

    Rush on the importance of sitting down and shutting up:

    “But everybody else on this bus tour—for the most part—is responsible for where we are. We did it their way in 2008. We did it with the candidate and approach that they thought would work. Pandering. ‘We got to listen to the American people.’ I maintain that when a politician says we have to listen to the American people and learn, we are pandering. We’re not leading.”

    Everybody else = Everyone who is not Jeb Bush. We = A sign Rush considers himself a politician, I hope, I hope, I hope.

  19. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:04

    Rush is right. Only losers like Hillary Clinton go on listening tours. Rush also said Jeb! and the others hate Palin because she’s the only Reagan Republican out there and that’s why she’s not on the not-listening tour. But now she is on the tour, so let us give thanks and praise to Rush for her addition.

  20. M. Bouffant said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:07

    And since you mention Sam “The Almost Plumber” Weaselwalker:

    He doesn’t let his “queer friends” near his children.

    And:

    God is recognized as, if you will, America’s religion.

    Yep. And also.

  21. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:12

    For those who were questioning the National Council for New America based on who was not on board

    Oh, yeah, THAT’s why we were questioning it.

    *snort*

  22. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:13

    Another way to see it would be as The Five Doctors, but instead of the first five guys who played Dr. Who, you hear that familiar scrapey, sireney sound, and out of a materialized Port-a-San comes Haley Barbour, Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, John McCain, and Mitt Romney.

    Indeed, I cannot wait for the GOP ticket in 2012: Darlek/The Master “We will will exterminate humanity!”

    Strangely, they’ll do better than Palin or Jindal as the newly sane American public enjoys the refreshing honesty of this platform.

  23. henry lewis said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:37

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

  24. mingo said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:37

    oh, please. please, dear God/FSM/Universe/whatever, please let them go on a lecture-America tour, telling us what a bunch of whiners we are and to just suck it up and be thankful for the crumbs corporations might see fit to throw us. you know, we really need to hear that; it would be most bracing.

  25. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:47

    The new GOP now with more ignominy.
    If that is the same as less gnominy, then surely it is a change for the better. Bloody gnomes.

  26. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:48

    I maintain that when a politician says we have to listen to the American people and learn, we are pandering. We’re not leading.

    Hint, Pigman: leaders in a democracy/republic like the United States, they listen to their consituents ’cause that’s what the whole “democracy” things’s about. “We The People” and crazy shit like that.

    What you’re thinking of there, Oxy-Man, is what we usually call a “dictatorship”. Maybe you’re comfortable with leaders like that, but I have the funny feeling the American people as a whole aren’t.

  27. Brad Hanson said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:49

    The NCNA said they weren’t going to kowtow to the religious right and they stuck to their guns for almost 24 hours before they folded.

    Teaching tour = Authoritarian Lollapalooza

  28. PopeRatzo said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:49

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.

  29. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:55

    Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teaching tour.

    Because shut up, that’s why.

  30. Honus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 13:59

    The thing that strikes me as obvious, and Imthink most of the country now sees it too, is that while the democrats are trying to address the problems that are facing the country, the solutions the republicans are looking for is how to win elections again.

  31. Honus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:00

    The idea that an intellectual engine like Palin must be on board with this movement just highlights the craveness.

  32. Lady Arky said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:04

    He doesn’t let his “queer friends” near his children.

    I saw that this morning and thought that’s pretty funny coming from Jeff “Sperm Cannon” Gannon’s long-lost twin brother.

    I do wonder how this works. Does he lock the kids up before the queer friends come over? Does he tell them “Hey look, we can be friends but if you look at my kids I’ll shoot you?”

    Could it be “queer friends” means a cashier/bank teller/bartender he thinks is gay whom he is labeling as a friend for the purpose of making an ass of himself. Again?

    Nah.

  33. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:05

    This central to my point.

  34. henry lewis said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:07

    Any Republican with even an iota of a smidgen of mainstream appeal will be slapped down by Rash Limpbowel and consigned to the wilderness. The GOP devolving into a whackjob fringe party feeds his lust for power.

  35. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:10

    Palin/Bachmann 2012!

    Also known as the “Throw Restraint To The Wind” strategy.

  36. javafascist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:13

    All that’s missing is a Princess Leia slave costume (and perhaps a case of viagra) to achieve the largest circle jerk in history.

  37. henry lewis said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:16

    He doesn’t let his “queer friends” near his children.

    Hey, everybody, I’m miserable and paranoid and I’m doomed to make the same mistakes millions of asshole dads before me did.

  38. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:31

    Teaching tour = Authoritarian Lollapalooza

    Now with extra looza!

  39. Legalize said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:37

    There is so much gold whenever Not Joe the Not Plumber speaks. For instance:

    “It’s not like ["queer" is] a slur, like you would call a white person a honky or something like that.”

    Gold, I tells ya.

  40. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:50

    Maybe Palin can make her lecture into a slide show, and the GOP can film a documentary about it.

  41. Derelict said,

    May 5, 2009 at 14:57

    Some see the dream ticket as Palin/Jindal. Wrong.

    The REAL Republican dream ticket is Palin/Bachmann. Just think of the unbridled lunacy!

  42. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:01

    Coming to a pizza parlor in a mall near you.

  43. henry lewis said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:06

    I wonder if the republicans know that NCNA is urban slang for humping your cousin in the ear?

  44. Cargo said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:09

    Not even my dirtiest, sexiest West Wing Democrat fantasies could have prepared me for these times.

    I couldn’t possibly agree more. The GOP is now exceeding the Aaron Sorkin caricatures and what’s more, people aren’t actually falling for it (much) anymore

  45. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:11

    Funny, we haven’t heard much from Jean Schmidt lately…

    U.S. Reps. Mike Turner and Jean Schmidt plan to introduce a bill that would allow communities refusing stimulus money to give that money back to the U.S. Treasury.

    The bill comes after Warren County commissioners refused $373,400 in stimulus money for new transit buses in March. The commissioners said they opposed the idea of federal deficit spending for buses and vans, and Warren County Commission President Mike Kilburn was quoted saying he would let Warren County “go broke before taking any of Obama’s filthy money.”

    Smart thinkin’.

  46. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:11

    Coming to a pizza parlor in a mall near you.

    Amazing. Amazing. Click on “National Leaders” to see their “National Panel of Experts” leading off with Lamar Alexander, Roy Blunt and John Boener.

    When you eschew science, education, academia and reason generally, I suppose then that the elected leaders of the Republican party can be “experts”

    I wonder if they’re going to propose Tax Cuts? That always works, they should keep using it.

  47. Gary said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:16

    Gary Ruppert said above, “The fact is, the biased media and your liberal brainwashing insures you liberals believe things about USA that are not true. Truth is, we are about God and Freedom, and we do not like class war and homosexuality.”

    What are you babbling about? You have been foisting class war on the middle class for thirty years.

    As for homosexuality, you don’t have to practice it, no one is forcing you to.

    Anyway, I’d rather have homosexuality than genocide and confederacy any day.

  48. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:22

    Warren County Commission President Mike Kilburn was quoted saying he would let Warren County “go broke before taking any of Obama’s filthy money.”

    Some have worried that the bench strength of Republican crazy is thin, and after Palin, Cantor, Boener, Inhofe, Cornyn, Romney, Perry and Jindal leave the scene, they might run out of nuts. No, my friend, the Republican farm teams are still churning out some solid talent.

    I look forward to the Kilburn 2020 Presidential campaign. His plan to blow up the moon will form an awesome wedge issue, putting Democrats in the uncomfortable positions of being soft on werewolves and in league with the environmental wackos like NASA who will oppose the plan.

  49. SqueakyRat said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:36

    Tax cuts and a free slice!

  50. Gary Ruppert said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:41

    Anyway, I’d rather have homosexuality than genocide and confederacy any day.

    It’s no surprise that a liberal like you would prefer the option that explicitly goes against God.

    Also, I’m sick of leftists treating “Confederacy” like it’s a dirty word — it’s long past time we conservatives reclaimed it.

    If it weren’t for fascist looters like Lincoln forcing their unfunded mandates on the entrepreneurs of the South, we wouldn’t have all these problems that we have today.

  51. Peter Principle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:46

    Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.

    And yet the light remains out for Dave Broder, Fred Hiatt, and company.

    They’re paid to keep the lights out.

  52. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:47

    Also, I’m sick of leftists treating “Confederacy” like it’s a dirty word — it’s long past time we conservatives reclaimed it.

    That is a brilliant idea. Please encourage your GOP leadership to do so. If that doesn’t cure the ails of an all white party floundering in a decreasingly white America, nothing will.

    WRITE YOUR SENATORS

  53. Randy P said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:50

    It’s no surprise that a liberal like you would prefer the option that explicitly goes against God.

    Also, I’m sick of leftists treating “Confederacy” like it’s a dirty word — it’s long past time we conservatives reclaimed it.

    If it weren’t for fascist looters like Lincoln forcing their unfunded mandates on the entrepreneurs of the South, we wouldn’t have all these problems that we have today.

    Here’s how far the GOP has descended into nut territory: I am now completely unable to discern whether a comment like this is a joke or a sincere transmission from Rush’s planet.

  54. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:51

    Yeah, I am having second thoughts about the seriousness of that post too. I think it’s the “entrepeneurs” of the south – no real conservative would use a pansy frenchified word like that.

  55. CKDexterHaven said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:52

    You still have Gary Ruppert? The other blogs will be so jealous. To see him in here ‘reclaiming’ treason is waay fun.

  56. g said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:55

    I wasn’t aware that Joe the Not-Plumber even had kids. Let alone gay kids.

  57. Ann Naughthouse said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:03

    Multiple parody Gary Rupperts is an internet tradition of which all Sadly Naughts are aware.

    And why aren’t you talking about me anymore?

  58. kiki said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:05

    As for homosexuality, you don’t have to practice it, no one is forcing you to.

    Oh, but they are. Those damned fags keep coming up and sucking Gary’s cock every time he goes to the White Swallow Men’s Bath House. There’s nothing he can do about it.

  59. The Cat said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:17

    And reciprocation is only polite.

  60. Lesley said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:35

    “On board” what? The Titanicon?

  61. MrSparkle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:43

    Slightly OT, but please allow me to use my Richard Cohen voice.

    *ahem*

    How dare the GOP cave in to the forces of affirmative action by using one of their few non-white guys in that advertisement? As a “conditional liberal”, I am appalled that this spot on this new group’s “panel of experts” didn’t go to a white man who would have obviously been better qualified than that crazy Indian character Bobby Jindal!

  62. Anonymous said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:44

    Hey, at least the Shriners care about burn victims…

  63. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:48

    “On board” what? The Titanicon?

    That’s Titanicon A.E., buster.

  64. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:49

    Slightly OT, but please allow me to use my Richard Cohen voice.

    Not bad, but where’s the “gimme five bees for a quarter” and the part about the yellow onion on your belt?

  65. El Cid said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:50

    I think what America really needs is a tour by libertarian engineers screaming at them that everybody else is stupid and Ayn Rand had it all figured out in that book and also shut up with your fag marriage shit.

  66. JM said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:53

    Except that John McCain his caught in a time warp with Romana and can’t contribute.

  67. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:54

    Except that John McCain his caught in a time warp with Romana and can’t contribute.

    What, he doesn’t know to wiggle K-9′s tail? N00b.

  68. kiki said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:56

    Conservatism has failed, so they’re all libertarians now. It’s just that they happen to be libertarians who hate the homos and think you should be killed if you don’t worship Jesus. Which is completely different to conservatism.

  69. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:57

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.

    It can’t be long before per se wanders in.

    Oh, there it is!

  70. Bitter Scribe said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:58

    Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.

    More like a hole developed in America’s collective wallet.

  71. El Cid said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:59

    Conservatism has failed, so they’re all libertarians now. It’s just that they happen to be libertarians who hate the homos and think you should be killed if you don’t worship Jesus. Which is completely different to conservatism.

    Today’s NuLibertarianism includes the view that things like habeas corpus and fair trials and rights against unwarranted search and surveillance are optional and that the government can choose to ignore those so-called ‘inherent’ limits depending on how it happens to feel that day about the targets of those coercive activities.

  72. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 16:59

    Teaching tour = Authoritarian Lollapalooza

    LOLapalooza? If you will.

  73. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:13

    They’re all bozo’s on that bus.

  74. justme said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:24

    Gary Ruppert said,

    May 5, 2009 at 15:41

    Best Gary in ages.

  75. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:25

    I wonder if they’re going to propose Tax Cuts? That always works, they should keep using it.

    I went to the National Council for a New America site, clicked on “Principles,” clicked on “The Economy,” and then clicked on “Learn More.” That took me to Cantor the Whip’s “Economic Solutions Center,” and that’s when I stopped listening.

  76. DrBB said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:31

    Um, Gary, old sock, I think that particular “fascist looter” is pretty generally regarded as the founder of the party you’re apparently attempting to defend here.

    I do think you’re idea about the GOP making it a central aim of their messaging to reclaim “confederacy” as a positive term is a great idea though. You should definitely continue to promote it. We’re all behind you on that one.

  77. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:31

    Interesting. The NCNA was supposed to be about moderating some of the nutcase voices on the right in the Republican party.

    This is like the fox asking the farmer to be put in charge of the hen house and the faramer saying “Sure! We could use a moderate vegan like yourself!”

  78. commie atheist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:32

    For those of you who didn’t click on M. Bouffant’s link above, here’s Not-Joe the Not-Plumber’s insightful views on homos, in their entirety:

    In the last month, same-sex marriage has become legal in Iowa and Vermont. What do you think about same-sex marriage at a state level?

    At a state level, it’s up to them. I don’t want it to be a federal thing. I personally still think it’s wrong. People don’t understand the dictionary—it’s called queer. Queer means strange and unusual. It’s not like a slur, like you would call a white person a honky or something like that. You know, God is pretty explicit in what we’re supposed to do—what man and woman are for. Now, at the same time, we’re supposed to love everybody and accept people, and preach against the sins. I’ve had some friends that are actually homosexual. And, I mean, they know where I stand, and they know that I wouldn’t have them anywhere near my children. But at the same time, they’re people, and they’re going to do their thing.

  79. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:34

    Anyway, I’d rather have homosexuality than genocide and confederacy any day.

    It’s no surprise that a liberal like you would prefer the option that explicitly goes against God.

    So God is PRO-genocide?

    No wonder so many Jews died in WW2…

  80. commie atheist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:38

    Speaking of J. T. Plummer, has there ever been an equivalent moronic leftist spouting incoherent, poorly-thought-out platitudes getting this much media space, six months after an election rendered him irrelevant? I can’t remember any.

  81. El Cid said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:41

    So God is PRO-genocide?

    No wonder so many Jews died in WW2…

    According to the WWII documentary Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark, God only gets mad and intervenes when you touch His stuff without His permission. You can kill as many of His chosen people as you want, but just don’t open His Ark.

  82. DrBB said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:43

    Palin aside, I’m actually most pleased to see my BFF Lamarr Alexander up there on the “onboard” list. He earned my eternal love for picking my top fave “Most Unintentionally Self-Revealing Campaign Theme Song in US History” for his presidential bid back when. “Same as it ever was” by Talking Heads. Guess he liked the title and never listened to any of the lyrics.

    “You may find yourself living in a shotgun shack”

    “You may say to yourself, my god, what have I done!”

    Truly a distillation of GOP policies and philosophy in musical form, though perhaps not quite in the way Mr Lamarr probably thought.

  83. MzNicky said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:43

    commie atheist: They’ve gotta fill those 24/7 news slots with something. And I think it was Jon Stewart who asked “Why?”

  84. Wyatt Watts III said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:44

    I’ve had some friends that are actually homosexual.

    As opposed to friends who are fraudulently homosexual?

  85. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:44

    Speaking of J. T. Plummer, has there ever been an equivalent moronic leftist spouting incoherent, poorly-thought-out platitudes getting this much media space, six months after an election rendered him irrelevant?

    Jerry Brown, circa 1992.

    Not that I dislike what Brown had to say in the primaries or his positions, but by then he had been so thoroughly rejected by so many different voting populations that it was hard to think of anything he said seriously.

  86. MzNicky said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:47

    DrBB: Oh sure, easy for YOU to say. You don’t have Lamar! [sic] “representing” you in DC.

  87. mmy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:47

    So Sarah Palin is now on board, eh? I can just see the interview in 2012:

    “Which boards are you now on?”

    “Oh, all of ‘em.”

  88. SFAW said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:49

    Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teaching tour.

    God will doubtless smite me for this, but …

    While on tour, Rush will be teaching “boyrigami”.

  89. Mr. Wonderful said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:53

    “Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.”

    And such as.

    Do not fail to read that interview w/ Joe the Idiot. He will be in my prayers to keep him front and center in the (stifles laughter) “Republican comeback.”

  90. Arky4That1 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:55

    If it weren’t for fascist looters like Lincoln forcing their unfunded mandates on ^down the throats of the entrepreneurs of the South, we wouldn’t have all these problems that we have today.

    Fixed to correct squawking point Fail.

  91. JMP said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:55

    actor212 – Yes actually; if you read some of the early parts of the bible, god loves him some genocide, and commands it many times; in fact, he got pissed off at the Israelites for not killing the enemy’s children at one point. One of the things that turned me off from Christianity.

  92. Wyatt Watts III said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:57

    Yes actually; if you read some of the early parts of the bible, god loves him some genocide…

    Almost as much as he loves slavery. And hates shrimp.

  93. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:58

    JMP,

    Ah, see, I draw a distinction between God wiping out his creations in a flood or raining plagues down on Egypt and men killing other men despite, you know, the silly little Commandment thingie…

  94. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 17:58

    Almost as much as he loves slavery. And hates shrimp.

    And football.

  95. histrogeek said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:02

    “Of course, as Rush said today, we don’t really need a listening tour. We need a teaching tour.”

    What you really need Rush a scolding tour in which you tell Americans what a bunch of stupid, ungrateful butt-munches they are.

  96. Dave in NYC said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:04

    In fairness, Jindal and Jeb Bush really aren’t “failed candidates”.

  97. justme said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:05

    And hates shrimp.

    That’s what turned me off to the whole Judeo-Christian philosophy.

    I mean, if I can’t have shrimp, what’s the point in any of it?

  98. joestork said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:08

    “Then, suddenly a light went on in America’s collective brain, and boom, out they went.”

    “More like a hole developed in America’s collective wallet.”

    Yeah, true. But hopefully, once the economy stabilizes somewhat, people won’t IMMEDIATELY go back to the Republicans. I mean, they have shamed themselves quite enormously these past 100 days. It’s very strange to see a party go from a position of near-insurmountable power to being a complete and utter international laughingstock in such a short span of time. Being a young guy, I’ve never seen anything like this before. I didn’t know it could happen like that.

    Somewhat relatedly, I was reading a post on another website by someone who was unemployed and suffering from cancer. She seemed pretty convinced that these salad days of Democratic domination were already numbered — that America was not in any way “cured” of conservatism, that the GOP would return sooner than people thought, and that Democrats should put all their political capital behind establishing a nationalized healthcare system as quickly as possible, even if the cost was letting other initiatives — including the torture investigations — drop. She said it was a horribly cynical position, but for her, there “were no other priorities.” I don’t agree, but it kind of gave me pause.

  99. PopeRatzo said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:11

    Sadly, No! should never miss an opportunity to include a photograph of people like Erik the Erikson.

    I almost often find that seeing their faces gives me new insight into the opinions and literary constructions of these goofballs.

    I’ll often think to myself: “Where do the things people like this say come from?” and then I’ll see a photo, say, of “K-Lo” or “Jonah Goldberg” or Ramesh Ponorruuruu and I’ll think, “Ah.”

    My grandma used to say “Beauty is as beauty does” and I’m not sure what that meant, but anyway, she said that.

  100. Overconfident Much? said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:12

    We’re coming back fast. Watch the Governor’s races this year–they’re the bellwether. Democrats are too busy doing victory laps to notice they’re about to get blindsided!

  101. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:19

    Speaking of J. T. Plummer, has there ever been an equivalent moronic leftist spouting incoherent, poorly-thought-out platitudes getting this much media space, six months after an election rendered him irrelevant? I can’t remember any.

    I certainly don’t remember Al Gore or John Kerry getting a quarter of the attention that McCain gets. Kerry was still a relatively senior sitting Senator. To be fair, that might be because Kerry and Gore just had some common decency to hold their tongues for awhile after losing, while McCain just can’t bring himself to skip a Sunday show invitation.

    Joe the Plumber wasn’t even a candidate, he holds no office, and is essentially a right wing celebrity. At least now we can point to him when the right grouses about Bono or Clooney.

  102. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:22

    There was a left-wing JtP. Her name was Cindy Sheehan, you may have heard of her.

  103. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:25

    Shall we bookmark it, overconfident?

    My Dad used to say, “beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes all the way to the bone.” Never had the opportunity to test it.

  104. pedestrian said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:29

    I would absolutely agree that our number one priority should be to establish comprehensive, effective national healthcare while we still have the votes. In every country in which a left-leaning government has done that, it has immediately become an untouchable right. Suddenly conservatives have a choice between accepting a fait accompli and fighting to boot sick kids out of hospitals.

    But here’s what I think we will get instead: A “public option” that is administered by well-connected corporations, has unaffordable premiums, and severely limits access to treatment. If we are lucky we may also be legally required to buy health insurance from our choice of five national providers. I’ve seen the future, and it is Massachusetts.

  105. SFAW said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:31

    We’re coming back fast. Watch the Governor’s races this year–they’re the bellwether. Democrats are too busy doing victory laps to notice they’re about to get blindsided!

    So that’s why Massachusetts had 47 Republican governors in a row! It’s really a solidly red state, but the voters, and polls, and Preznitential candidates didn’t know that.

    In fact things are looking so good, that I hear Barry Goldwater likes his chances in ’12.

  106. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:32

    Yes, god forbid people should have a CHOICE of health providers!

  107. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:32

    God only gets mad and intervenes when you touch His stuff without His permission.

    Yup. As my dear departed mother always said:

    “You can rape their women and kill their children, but don’t ever fuck with their money.

  108. pedestrian said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:38

    You can rape their women and kill their children, but don’t ever fuck with their money.

    What if I kill the women, fuck with the children, and rape the money?

  109. SFAW said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:40

    “Now where’s that Eskimo woman I gotta wrestle?”

  110. tata said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:43

    Yes, god forbid people should have a CHOICE of health providers!

    That’s the Republican plan EXACTLY!

  111. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:43

    So THAT’S them, the people. Curiously pale crowd there, seems to me. On the other hand, Drier and McConnell are on board so they’ve got the closeted homo community pretty well represented.

  112. kiki said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:44

    There was a left-wing JtP. Her name was Cindy Sheehan, you may have heard of her.

    Cindy Sheehan lost her son. Joe the Plumber lost a few dollars off his tax bill. Priorities, people!

  113. Lawnguylander said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:46

    His phone is ringing off the hook but he’s not a plumber.

  114. pedestrian said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:46

    Curiously pale crowd there, seems to me.

    With the exception of Boehner.

  115. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:50

    Yes, god forbid people should have a CHOICE of health providers!

    Yes, in America, the poor and lower middle class have their CHOICE of insurance providers who will reject them or charge more than they can afford.

    Later, when they get sick, they can CHOOSE which hospital to have bankrupt them.

    Now that’s FREEDOM.

  116. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:51

    Cindy Sheehan lost her son. Joe the Plumber lost a few dollars off his tax bill. Priorities, people!

    Never mind that Obama talked to Joe-The-Not-Plumber face-to-face. Bush & Sheehan? Not so much.

  117. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:52

    Cindy Sheehan lost her son. Joe the Plumber lost saved a few dollars off his tax bill. Priorities, people!

    Clarified.

  118. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:54

    We’re coming back fast. Watch the Governor’s races this year–they’re the bellwether.

    So, the goalposts have moved from NY-20, I see. Especially since your predictions were so tragically faily, with a big sidecar of ignominy.

  119. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:56

    Having NOTHING isn’t a choice.

  120. freepatriot said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:56

    lushbo limpballs says the repuglitards need to go on a “Teaching Tour” ???

    by all means, lushbo, please take it upon yourself to tour America, lecturing people on why exactly they are NOT real Americans

    I can think of no greater advertisment for electing Democtrats

    America just loves like lectures from limp dicked drug addled junkies

    bring it on, doofus

  121. Iggy Nominy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:56

    Why does everyone hate me so?

  122. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 18:58

    Also.

    When every Republican governer is tossed on their ass, where will the goal post move next?

    “The county school boards are the real bellwether! Then you will be cowed with our power over your sweet, succulent, unprotected children!”

  123. Mysticdog said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:00

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.

    Per Se.

    Heh. Indeed.

  124. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:00

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

  125. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:02

    America just loves like lectures from limp dicked drug addled junkies

    Hey! He only too all those drugs ’cause… ummm… ummm…. ’cause Hillary MADE him do it! Yeah! Yeah! Her husband stressed the Pigman out so much he had to send his maid off to buy shoeboxes full of illegal narcotics. Yup yup yup.

  126. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:03

    So that when you get the bankrupting cancer, you don’t die in a gutter.

  127. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:03

    TEDISCOREPUBLICAN GOVERNORZ WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINS MOTHER FUCKERS!

    Suckbookmark it libs, suckbookmark it hard!

  128. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:03

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

    Like “getting sick”?

  129. Ms Hannigan said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:03

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

    Why anyone would choose to be an orphan is beyond me.

  130. Olexicon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:04

    “Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?”

    You mean like when yoiur insurance premiums go up?

  131. Marion in Savannah said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:05

    Yeah, Austrian. My aunt was such a fool when she DECIDED to get breast cancer…

  132. Mysticdog said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:05

    “Having NOTHING isn’t a choice.”

    But we have been told Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose. So from that perspective, the total absence of health care is the ultimate health care freedom.

    Oh sure, you could lose your actual health, but that really doesn’t affect your health care freedom.

    Please hire me American Hospital Association! I can rationalize this shit in my sleep!

  133. Steerpike said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:06

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.

    Per Se.

    Heh. Indeed.

    If you will

  134. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:07

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

    It’s only fair. Your mother made a bad decision in not aborting you and that has cost all of us dearly. Call it fairness, call it payback, call it whatever the fuck you want. We’re going to cal it the law.

  135. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:08

    Yep. And also.

    As it were.

    So to speak.

    Per Se.

    Heh. Indeed.

    If you will

    Such as.

  136. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:09

    But we have been told Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose.

    If I remember right, the wise Republican consultant to say that crashed a race car into a cactus and died.

    So fuck that guy.

  137. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:10

    Your mother made a bad decision in not aborting you

    Objection! Assumes facts not in evidence!

  138. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:12

    Objection! Assumes facts not in evidence!

    Yeah, for all we know he could have been budded off like so many other fungi do.

  139. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:14

    I’m talking about someone who smokes six packs a day, eats shit, never exercises, drinks heavily, etc.

    No private insurer would ensure him. But under single payer the government would FORCE me to help pay for his bad decisions.

  140. Olexicon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:15

    Austrian Economics is smart he doesn’t even have to spell insurance correctly to make his point

  141. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:17

    So THAT’S them, the people. Curiously pale crowd there, seems to me. On the other hand, Drier and McConnell are on board so they’ve got the closeted homo community pretty well represented.

    One person of color, two women, and the rest old boys. New America indeed, so long as one ignores demography.

  142. D.N. Nation said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:17

    Glibertarians are so cute when they beg the question. Just wanna pinch those rosy cheeks.

  143. Aaron said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:18

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

    Same reason I have to pay for W.’s war in Iraq. Same reason I have to pay for the mistakes of incompetent bankers. Same reason I have to pay for a justice system that’s all too often unjust.

    Because we’re all in it together, whether we like it or not. You’re going to wind up paying for my bad health decisions, just like I’m going to wind up paying for your bad investment decisions, because sooner or later the bill always comes due. It just costs less when you pay up front. Instead of complaining about the system (from which we all, including you, benefit way more than we pay in), it would be way more productive to try to think of ways to make it work better, because the system ain’t going away. It’s a feature.

  144. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:18

    No private insurer would ensure him. But under single payer the government would FORCE me to help pay for his bad decisions.

    They already do, since now you have to subsidize his use of the emergency room when his undiagnosed diabetes becomes acute. Then you have to pay for his family’s social assistance after their primary breadwinner dies, the sherriff to evict them from the house they can’t afford, the police and prisons to lock up his kids when they turn to crime…

    Instead of paying for all that, you could have had a doctor diagnose and start treatment for $500. But I guess you understand fancy economics in a way us liberals don’t.

  145. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:19

    Just wanna pinch those rosy cheeks.

    There’s a market for that, you know.

  146. El Cid said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:20

    Yes, god forbid people should have a CHOICE of health providers!

    Why should I not be able to choose a public service health plan because a bunch of Ayn Rand and von Mises infants think it’s tyranny?

  147. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:21

    eats shit

    Ah, the common house fly, aka Insecticus Republicanus. Subsitsting entirely on a diet of bullshit from such sources as FAUX News, Glenn Bleccch, the Pigman, The American Spectator u.s.w. the common house fly is presently considered an endagered species but is neverhtless recommended for hunting, if not eating.

  148. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:22

    I thought the talking point was that government-provided health care is just another word for “NWO eugenics-based rationing”, which is directly orthogonal to this new talking point where the government will be powerless to deny unhealthy people that delicious, delicious healthcare money.

  149. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:24

    it would be way more productive to try to think of ways to make it work better, because the system ain’t going away. It’s a feature

    Alternatively, you can move your anti-social ass to Somalia. They are your kind of people – a man is only limited by his ingenuity (and weaponry).

  150. Johnny Pez said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:24

    I was questioning the NCNA because it didn’t include Lord Cheney, and it still doesn’t include him so I’m still questioning it.

  151. g said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:24

    There was a left-wing JtP. Her name was Cindy Sheehan, you may have heard of her.

    I don’t recall any national Democratic candidate inviting her up on the dais with them, or invoking her as an icon for “the people” during a debate. nor do I recall the time Democratic congresspeople invited her to advise them as a group.

  152. g said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:25

    Why should I have to pay for someone that made bad health decisions?

    You already do! That’s how private insurance works!

  153. The Tragically Flip said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:26

    Well, he’s also still operating under the bullshit RW talking point that UHC means a government bureaucrat will make health care decisions for him. Maybe in the Soviet Union it worked that way, but I’m not aware of any other UHC country that lacks choice of provider/doctor/hospital.

    Just ask someone in an HMO how much CHOICE they have.

  154. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:27

    They’re not decisions so much as they’re rolls of the dice.

  155. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:28

    Just ask someone in an HMO how much CHOICE they have.

    Yeah, but in an HMO some schmuck is making money, the highest Republican good. They don’t mind getting screwed over, they just don’t want the government to do it.

  156. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:28

    Don’t employers already have to insure fat, crap-eating smokers, usually at the same group rate everyone else pays?

  157. g said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:29

    Don’t employers already have to insure fat, crap-eating smokers, usually at the same group rate everyone else pays?

    God knows mine does!

  158. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:31

    Don’t employers already have to insure fat, crap-eating smokers, usually at the same group rate everyone else pays?

    At my previous job in an office of seven people, my health insurance rates (for a 20-something non-smoker with no preexisting conditions) were jacked up because the same plan had to cover my boss (50-something smoker with high blood pressure), so it goes both ways.

  159. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:41

    It’s so amusing, the whines about otherpeople who eat crap coming from a Frito Lays preferred customer. That truckload of Cheetoh’s aint gonna eat itself, y’know?

  160. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:43

    Also, I like the impression it provides that he’s going to be specifically asked to pay medical costs for one guy.

    Tell you what, ever seen Superman 3? With the whole percentage of a percentage of a single cent that the banks just toss out because they can’t use it?

    That’s how we’re gonna pay for people’s medical costs. Everyone together will have a slim ten-thousandth of a penny shorn off their taxes, then we’ll combine those ten-thousandth of a penny into pennies, which will become dollars, which will cover the costs of medical bills for everyone!

    Then when you get sick from the projected morbidly obese heart disease, cirrhotic-liver, destroyed smoker’s lung, stomach ulcers and hemorrhoids from being angry and evil all the time, and the cancer which will always come to get you, you’ll be covered.

    By us.

    All of us.

    Because we care what happens to you, and don’t want to see you die in a gutter penniless, alone, and eaten by rats and feral dogs.

    Because that’s sad and depressing, even for an asshole like you.

  161. Blue Mommy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:47

    Please don’t compare the NCNA to Shriners, even in jest! Our local Shriners Hospital provides orthotics for my son (who has CP) that my HMO refuses to pay for. They will continue to do so completely free of charge until he turns 18.

    I do suspect, though, that if they began campaigning for free healthcare for disabled children, they might find that their claim to the moral high ground got a little more traction with voters.

  162. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:50

    A government “option” is just a trojan horse for simgle payer.

    It will keep costs very low in the beginning (it will be able to do this through taxes and printing money. Something the private sector can’t do.)

    Then once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality.

  163. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:50

    I do suspect, though, that if they began campaigning for free healthcare for disabled children, they might find that their claim to the moral high ground got a little more traction with voters.

    That will happen when Winged Malkins start flying out of gooper behinds.

  164. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:50

    Aw c’mon. We all know that teh gummint can’t do anything as efficiently as the GREAT AND GLORIOUS FREE MARKET.

    Nelson’s problem, he told CQ, is that the public plan would be too attractive and would hurt the private insurance plans. “At the end of the day, the public plan wins the game,” Nelson said. Including a public option in a health plan, he said, was a “deal breaker.”

    Yeah, the private, for profit, GREAT AND GLORIOUS FREE MARKET FROM WHENCE ALL GOOD THINGS COME couldn’t compete. Go figure.

  165. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:51

    The government is like Walmart?

    You learn something new everyday!

  166. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:54

    Then once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality.

    OH NOES! OUR PLAN IS EXPOSED!!11! CURSES, FOILED AGAIN!!!

    But please tell me, Mr. Thoroughly Discredited Whacko Economic “Theory,” why would teh evil gummint do that? Why? No, I’m serious. What possible reason could there be if there’s not a profit motive?

  167. Parody Troll said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:54

    I’m sure that if everybody here refutes my arguments in exactly the right way, you have a chance to actually change my mind.

    It’s not as if I’m going to come back tomorrow and say the exact same shit all over again.

  168. mingo said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:54


    Because we care what happens to you, and don’t want to see you die in a gutter penniless, alone, and eaten by rats and feral dogs.


    and there is the difference between them and us. Even though we abhor and despise their viewpoints, we still are willing to have them benefit from the (vastly more efficient) single payer/universal health model. They are sociopaths, and to them a person fallen in the gutter needs to be kicked hard, not helped up.

  169. Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:56

    Then once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality.

    So, your argument is we shouldn’t allow the government to do this because the private industry wants the monopoly first?

  170. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:56

    why would teh evil gummint do that? Why?

    Remember these doofi want the gummint to be run like a business, and their idea of business is to drive all your competitors under then jack up the costs.

  171. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:58

    There.

  172. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:58

    Parody Troll said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:54

    I’m sure that if everybody here refutes my arguments in exactly the right way, you have a chance to actually change my mind.
    =========================================================
    A fair point. I couldn’t help but point out that troll just outlined Walmart’s business plan when describing how the government would shaft the people. And now, it’s back to the office!

  173. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 19:58

    The government does it because governments always want more power over you and your life. As Washington said government is like fire–a dangerous servant and terrible master.

  174. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:01

    I’m talking about someone who smokes six packs a day, eats shit, never exercises, drinks heavily, etc.

    No private insurer would ensure him. But under single payer the government would FORCE me to help pay for his bad decisions.

    You’re right.

    No private insurer would insure him. So he does without insurance, probably missing out on health maintenance help.

    So when he goes to the ER for the heart attack and can’t pay, whom do you think pays that bill, hmmmmm?

    You do. I do. That’s why an aspirin costs $12.

    So rather than have the government “force” you to pay $5 to help him kick the habits and lose weight, you’d rather the HMO “forced” you to pay a few hundred a year.

    Smart decision, boy-o….No wonder Republicans were voted out of office.

  175. Galactic Dustbin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:01

    Another way to see it would be as The Five Doctors, but instead of the first five guys who played Dr. Who, you hear that familiar scrapey, sireney sound, and out of a materialized Port-a-San comes Haley Barbour, Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, John McCain, and Mitt Romney.

    Vote Saxon!

  176. Olexicon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:03

    Shorter Austrian Parody

    “The roof The roof the roof is on fire”

  177. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:03

    Austrian Economics said,
    May 5, 2009 at 19:50

    A government “option” is just a trojan horse for simgle payer.

    I happen to know that horse, and he told me you absolutely refused to wear a Trojan.

    Also, you promised him you’d call. Bastard.

  178. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:04

    So rather than have the government “force” you to pay $5 to help him kick the habits and lose weight, you’d rather the HMO “forced” you to pay a few hundred a year.

    I think the idea is just to close the ERs to anyone who doesn’t have insurance.

    And then outlawing protests about it.

  179. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:04

    As Washington also said, “goddamn, but these wooden teeth were an awful idea.”

  180. Austrian Economics said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:04

    I agree the government shouldn’t pay for emergency rooms for people who can’t afford it. It should be left to private charity.

  181. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:06

    Then once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality.

    We already pay more per capita for healthcare than any other country on the planet.

    So the problem is….?

  182. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:07

    I agree the government shouldn’t pay for emergency rooms for people who can’t afford it. It should be left to private charity.

    TRANSLATION:

    I see dead brown and old people everywhere and smile.

    Hater.

    We tried that for 150 years in this country and had the one of the highest death rates among people over 50 in the world.

    Try again, son, only first, go read a real book.

  183. George Washington said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:07

    Quote me in your douchebag glibertarian rants and somehow reconcile that with the fact that I believed I was morally justified in owning other human beings! Go ahead! Try it!

  184. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:08

    To paraphrase a commenter at Wonkette, isn’t “Austrian Economics” when you put on a brown shirt and march around seizing businesses and property from the Jews?

  185. Teabagger said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:09

    TEH AMURKAN TAXPAYERS R JOOS FOR OBAMA’S OVENS!!!!

  186. g said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:10

    A government “option” is just a trojan horse for simgle payer.

    It will keep costs very low in the beginning (it will be able to do this through taxes and printing money. Something the private sector can’t do.)

    Then once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality.

    You know, this is a capsule version of the mind-set of these guys. It’s not even ideology, it’s insane paranoia. They truly believe that “the government” ZOD-cyclopean Entity, or whatever, has a long-range goal to – what? To provide BAD SERVICE to citizens.

    No, not misguided socialist ideals, not the belief – naive or not – that citizens deserve benefits, not some kind of egalitarian impulse that some people disagree with – but the end goal is to provide BAD SERVICE.

    And in order to achieve this goal it will provide excellent low-cost service only to tdeliberately urn the excellent low-cost service into BAD SERVICE once all other options are gone.

    You’d at least think that wingnuts would be sane enough to credit government with holding misguided beliefs that it would fail to deliver on due to bureacratic incompetence.

    But these idiots believe that the motive driving “government” is to simply make citizens as dissatisfied as possible, deliberating choosing to do so.

    Since that is in fact the goal of the Norquist arm of Wingnuttitude, once again we have a perfect example of Wingnut Projection.

  187. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:11

    As Washington also said, “goddamn, but these wooden teeth were an awful idea.”

    He also lied his ass off about that cherry tree, but he knew a good PR push when he saw (said) one.

  188. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:12

    But these idiots believe that the motive driving “government” is to simply make citizens as dissatisfied as possible, deliberating choosing to do so.

    Which does explain the modern Republican Party.

  189. George Washington's Slaves said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:12

    He blamed that one on us, actually.

  190. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:13

    When New America fails, will they try Crystal America?

  191. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:13

    But these idiots believe that the motive driving “government” is to simply make citizens as dissatisfied as possible, deliberating choosing to do so.

    Because the gubmint is keeping them all from being squillionaires!

    These spoiled brats are too much. They’d be whining for Mommy after a month or so, after the world put a heapin’ helpin’ of butthurt on ‘em.

  192. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:14

    “Austrian Economics”? Why don’t you just name yourself “Phlogiston Theory”?

  193. Marlowe said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:14

    “When New America fails, will they try Crystal America?”
    Given their lionization of Beck, Santelli and all the other dickhead frat-wingnuts, I’d guess they’ll go with Jolt America.

  194. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:15

    When New America fails, will they try Crystal ^Meth America?

    Fixed your post for you.

  195. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:16

    When New America fails, will they try Crystal America?

    I LOLed.

    I think they’ll go with “America Classic”.

  196. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:17

    But these idiots believe that the motive driving “government” is to simply make citizens as dissatisfied as possible, deliberating choosing to do so.

    As evidence, they cite the “inefficient” Postal service, conveniently forgetting that the USPS is mandated to provide an identical level of service to every community across the country at the same low price, no matter how remote.

    A mandate neither Fedex, UPS or any other private service would dare try to match. But they’ll be happy to sop up whatever profit centers the USPS has and thus make the USPS an even “worse bargain”

  197. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:17

    Vanilla America! Diet Lemon America! Cherry Chocolate Dr. America! America Throwback (with the great retro taste of Goldwater!)

  198. N__B said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:17

    What possible reason could there be if there’s not a profit motive?

    Because they’re eeeeviiil sooooocialiiiiistsssss!

  199. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:18

    Why don’t you just name yourself “Phlogiston Theory”?

    The (four) humors are on you now, eh, Rusty?

  200. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:19

    Because they’re eeeeviiil sooooocialiiiiistsssss!

    I honestly believe that rightards can’t conceive of any way to behave other than their own greedhead scheming. It’s like when that idiot was saying that pacifists were going to come murder us all because “the struggle” demands that every ideology, even nonviolence, be spread through violence.

  201. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:20

    I am feeling sclerotic and sanguine, actor.

  202. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:21

    I myself often feel phlegmatic.

    *hock ptew*

  203. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:21

    I am feeling sclerotic and sanguine, actor.

    Clearly a phlegm/blood imbalance.

  204. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:22

    I’d guess they’ll go with Jolt America.

    I’ve been meaning to mention this, not that it likely applies to anyone here. Rockstar is the energy drink choice of fascists everywhere.

  205. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:22

    The reasoning:

    I don’t like government
    Therefore, government is the opposite of me
    I like freedom
    Therefore, government must want not-freedom
    Therefore, everything the government does is done to make everyone less free
    WOLVERINES

  206. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:22

    I am feeling sclerotic and sanguine, actor.

    Sclerotic doesn’t mind, but Sanguine will sue you for sexual harassment.

  207. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:23

    I believe my rotund state is a result of a Humor, that being, Good.

  208. St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:23

    Sclerotic doesn’t mind, but Sanguine will sue you for sexual harassment.

    Wasn’t she that dancer from “Moulin Rouge?”

  209. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:24

    Rusty, I think your djartklom needs a tune-up.

  210. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:25

    Hussein Obama Motumbe X has declared Purple Drink America.

  211. N__B said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:25

    I honestly believe that rightards can’t conceive of any way to behave other than their own greedhead scheming.

    We’re back to the whole zero-sum issue. In their view, there’s a constant amount of assholery in the world, which cannot be reduced. It can be converted, but e=mc² says that the result explosion would make life on earth untenable.

    It’s like when that idiot was saying that pacifists were going to come murder us all because “the struggle” demands that every ideology, even nonviolence, be spread through violence.

    I missed that, but like it. When Vermont and New Hampshire merge, their license plates could read “Peace, or Die.”

  212. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:27

    The worth of Austrian economics is truly measured by its success in the marketplace, which is like unto that of Diet Crystal Pepsi with Lime.

  213. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:28

    Also, Maine will soon be in our hands!

    Suck it, asshole bigot freichtards!

    BWAHAHABWAHAHA

  214. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:28

    Rusty, I think your djartklom needs a tune-up.

    Volkswagen really need to rethink their model names.

  215. Julia Grey said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:28

    The thing I noticed about The New American I’m Not Listening La-La-La Council is that already-running South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford is not on it.

    This bodes ill, but not for Sanford. He doesn’t think he needs to listen, either — he has all the answers and the divvil take the hindmost — but he’s even more arrogant in not even deigning to pretend he will.

  216. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:28

    Rockstar is the energy drink choice of fascists everywhere.

    Rockstar is Weiner juice?! Yuck.

    I’m glad I switched to Ed Hardy.

  217. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:29

    Also, Maine will soon be in our hands!

    Suck it, asshole bigot freichtards!

    Darling, I think that’s what they are afraid of!

  218. Mouthful of Kelp said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:30

    Sounds to me like they’re into Redstate Bull.

  219. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:30

    Rusty, I think your djartklom needs a tune-up.

    So I Googled “djartklom,” and the website I found appears to be half English/half Middle Elfin.

  220. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:32

    I thought Jew blood was the drink of fascists everywhere.

  221. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:33

    djartklom

    I thought it was the place Danish photographers developed their work.

  222. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:33

    Gurdjieff? Really?

    God damn I love the internet.

    Amity Milford (from Wonkette) and djartklom in the same day.

  223. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:33

    Unity Milford. Whatever.

  224. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:35

    The government does it because governments always want more power over you and your life.

    So in the mind of someone who calls themselves “Austrian Economics” the government is not of, by, and for the people, but is instead the hand-rubbing moustache-twisting villain out of a real shitty comic book.

    If you really want to base your political philosophy on the American government as some sort of third-rate Dr. Doom, hey, whatever. Just dom’t be surprised when we laugh at you.

  225. pedestrian said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:35

    …”The police officer would say things to me like, ‘Your son is going to child protective services because you are not saying what we need to hear,”

    Guillory, who practices in nearby Nacogdoches, Texas, estimates authorities in Tenaha seized $3 million between 2006 and 2008, and in about 150 cases — virtually all of which involved African-American or Latino motorists — the seizures were improper.

    “They are disproportionately going after racial minorities,” he said. “My take on the matter is that the police in Tenaha, Texas, were picking on and preying on people that were least likely to fight back.”

    Daniels told CNN that one of the officers who stopped him tried on some of his jewelry in front of him.

    “They asked me, ‘What you are doing with this ring on?’ I said I had bought that ring. I paid good money for that ring,” Daniels said. “He took the ring off my finger and put it on his finger and told me how did it look. He put on my jewelry.”

    Texas law states that the proceeds of any seizures can be used only for “official purposes” of district attorney offices and “for law-enforcement purposes” by police departments. According to public records obtained by CNN using open-records laws, an account funded by property forfeitures in Russell’s office included $524 for a popcorn machine, $195 for candy for a poultry festival, and $400 for catering.

    In addition, Russell donated money to the local chamber of commerce and a youth baseball league. A local Baptist church received two checks totaling $6,000.

    GLORY!

  226. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:35

    Unitard Milfy?

  227. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:37

    Unity Mitford. I can’t help it crazy ass British people give their children crazy ass names.

  228. Gary said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:37

    Gary Ruppert: “It’s no surprise that a liberal like you would prefer the option that explicitly goes against God.”

    I don’t believe in God. That is my right as an American not to believe. Many of the founders were deists, not Christians. Nothing un-American about that.

    Accept that the U.S. is made up of all kinds of people, just as the founders intended. You have a right to live as you do, so do I.

    Live and let live. Chill out.

  229. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:38

    Was Gurdjieff too obscure? For this crowd!?!!?

  230. SomeNYGuy said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:39

    $195 for candy for a poultry festival

    Jeez, what do they serve at the candy festival — pork chops?

  231. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:40

    I can’t help it crazy ass British people give their children crazy ass names.
    Please allow me this reprise.

  232. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:40

    I ain’t a cultured pig. Sorry.

  233. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:42

    Please allow me this reprise.

    That’s not crazy ass – that’s just evil.

    “What are you doing soldier! You are a MAJOR DICK HEAD!”

    (from across the base) “Sir?”

  234. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:42

    So many comments… so many topics!

    And for some reason, whenever I see the words ‘ignominy’ and ‘Republicans’ in close proximity, it always makes me think of hominy grits.

    Ignominy grits are made of finely ground crow.

    I’m talking about someone who smokes six packs

    Finally, getting back to the topic of Gavin’s high-lair-ee-ous post, I have only a cursory knowledge of Dr Who- shameful for such a geek as I. I followed some of the Wikipedia links, and found this tidbit, which exactly describes the NCNA’s blarging and harumphing:

    The sound effect of a Yeti’s roar is created by slowing down the sound of a flushing toilet

  235. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:50

    Was Gurdjieff too obscure? For this crowd!?!!?

    The only reason I knew about it was this weird little ad that appeared on the back of the Village Voice every week that said “Gurdjieff Speaks!”

    I wondered why they couldn’t shut him up.

  236. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 20:56

    Was Gurdjieff too obscure? For this crowd!?!!?

    Speaking for myself only, sadly yes. But I like learnin’ new stuff.

  237. jim said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:00

    Yeah … when I think “greatest minds of our time” I immediately think Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, & Mitt Romney – launching the “GOP 2: Teabagging Boogaloo” tour in a pizza parlour … move over Stephen Hawking, the AniBrainiacs are in the muthafuckin’ hood!

    I wonder if this brain-trust are the ones that led Steele to welcome moderates into the party that’s in the middle of ruthlessly purging itself of them. Such cunning strategery from The Party Of No.

    once all private insurers are driven into bankruptcy, the government will jack up costs and lower quality

    Talking-points may sound way hella kewl, but they make for really shitty ammo in a real debate of real issues.

    Private insurers are more likely to smell the coffee & sell out long before they’re insolvent – in the real world, that is.

    It might help me not to giggle at you if you can show even one place on Earth where this actually happened as a result of a shift to public healthcare. Come up to Canada & try that line – we can always use a good laugh. Our healthcare is some of the best in the world, it’s shitloads cheaper than yours – & we’re all covered 24/7. America can have the same universal coverage we enjoy the minute it sets its mind to getting it, stops swallowing the horror-story horseshit the HMOs keep shovelling, & decides to get it done.

    Before you start baaawing “OMG SOCIALIZED MEDICINE, OH NOEZ” keep in mind that it’s our health insurance that’s state-run … the hospitals here are every bit as private-sector as yours are. Enjoy your fail.

  238. Southern Beale said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:07

    For a true cavalcade of stupid, y’all need to head over to my place and check out the pro-gun wingnuts imagining all sorts of bizarre scenarios to justify their gun lust. It’s hilariously funny.

  239. Sly said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:11

    “The government does it because governments always want more power over you and your life. As Washington said government is like fire–a dangerous servant and terrible master.”

    Which explains why we avoid all forms of combustion.

    FIRE BAD!

  240. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:13

    I’m talking about someone who smokes six packs

    I was always afraid the moniker “beer bong” would confuse some folks.

  241. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:15

    I wasn’t aware that Rauchbier was any worse for you than regular beer.

  242. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:21

    I’m talking about someone who smokes six packs

    Six-packs are merely licked and sucked on. Pole is for smoking.

  243. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:21

    I wasn’t aware that Rauchbier was any worse for you than regular beer

    Can there be said to be such a thing as “regular beer”?

  244. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:23

    Can there be said to be such a thing as “regular beer”?

    Only if it’s sold in the tank next to the Diesel Beer.

  245. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:25

    Can there be said to be such a thing as “regular beer”?

    Well, I have one almost every night, is that not regular enough?

  246. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:25

    Can there be said to be such a thing as “regular beer”?

    Yes.

  247. jack said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:28

    Link submitted for your amusment… http://picasaweb.google.ca/partial.to.music/PoliticsStuff#5332425190044842834

  248. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:31

    I stand corrected.

    Furiously googling images of generic food.

  249. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:31

    FIRE BAD!

    You laugh, but I bet there was some Neanderthal Newt who sat around saying “So what’s WRONG with raw meat? You people just want to control my life!”

  250. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:34

    I hate WordPress. WordPress I hate, with its link eating propensities and comment-dropping trip.

    http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/articleAID=/19840101/REVIEWS/401010375/1023

    I think I need a beer.

  251. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:36

    You wanna try that again?

  252. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:47

    I wasn’t aware that Joe the Not-Plumber even had kids. Let alone gay kids.
    They live with their mothers.

  253. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:49

    WordPress and its “Document not found” messages.
    Were you thinking of a Generic Food scene from “Repo Man”? Have a Generic Beer.

  254. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:55

    Dickhead troll doesn’t know how risk-pooling works. Risk-pooling is the basis for all forms of insurance.

    Long story short – increasing the size of the pool is the best way to go, as far as the participants are concerned.

    Want to make a really big risk pool that benefits all involved? How about making it the size of the whole fucking country.

    Dickhead troll is a dickhead.

  255. Till said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:56

    Can there be said to be such a thing as “regular beer”?

    In Tschermanie, I think any pils will do.

  256. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 21:58

    No generic beer for me tonight, strictly Dos Equis to celebrate the heroic victors of Puebla. The local taco place cooks three cow heads a day, and I love telling the fetching counter girl, “Quereria cabeza.”

  257. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:01

    I wasn’t aware that Joe the Not-Plumber even had kids.

    I thought he just carried the eggs around in his cheek pouches until they were mature at which point he’d spew them forth to carry on alone.

  258. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:03

    Is today Sink-o duh Mayo, where I have a ham and mayo sandwich?

  259. Southern Beale said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:04

    (not)Joe the (not)Plumber does indeed have children, I remember that info coming out when John McCain first foisted JTP onto the American stage. I think he has full custody, IIRC.

  260. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:10

    Is today Sink-o duh Mayo

    Aieee! Reconquista! Reconquista! The Mexicans is coming! RUN FOR THE HILLS THE DAM IS BUST
    Someone call Loud Obbs and order the Malkin a basket of snotchos To Go!

  261. kingubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:20

    So in the mind of someone who calls themselves “Austrian Economics” the government is not of, by, and for the people, but is instead the hand-rubbing moustache-twisting villain out of a real shitty comic book.

    Pretty much, unless there’s a Southern White Male in charge in which case everyone should fall in line while he gets on the with the righteous smiting and so forth.

  262. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:22

    I wasn’t aware that Rauchbier was any worse for you than regular beer

    Teh Great Gazoogle tells me that there was indeed, as it were, a wave of concern in the late 70s / early 80s about nitrosamine compounds in beer, with Bamberg Rauchbier often mentioned as the worst offender by far, so to speak.

    …a technical committee was formed and headed by Dr. W.A. Harwick of Anheuser-Busch, Inc. This lead to various procedures that could be used to control N-nitrosodimethylamine (NDMA) levels in malt.

  263. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:28

    I have one of those generic beer cans in N.C.’s picture. Useta collect beer cans when a kid. The great thing about them is they take up a great deal of space while simultaneously failing to appreciate much in value.

  264. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:33

    This lead to various procedures that could be used to control N-nitrosodimethylamine (NDMA) levels in malt.

    I don’t want no NCNA in mah beer.
    MDMA, otoh, would be acceptable.

  265. henry lewis said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:33

    Austrian economics:

    Austria is well known for a generous social system. Although spending has been reduced in recent years, you will still find very good healthcare and a strong social security system. There is an extensive network of hospitals and doctors covering even the remotest areas of Austria.

  266. @ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:38

    Isn’t this wonderful? I remember the bad old days when people actually thought governments had a limited amount of money and couldn’t afford to indulge every idea, even ones that seemed attractive. Praise be to our Dear Leader, with whom all things are possible…for a while.

  267. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:43

    First, I have to ask whether Rusty has an Olde Frothingslosh (so light the foam is on the bottom!) can. I have a couple, somewhere or other.

    Second, since things are slow, via GayPutzRiot, somebody call a waaambulance for Calamity Shlaes.

  268. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:44

    PeeJ, I do believe I have an OF or two down in mater’s basement.

    Ah, the ’70s…

  269. @ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:45

    Too bad Bachmann isn’t as brilliant as Biden, who said Franklin Roosevelt went “on the TV” and “talked about the stocket market crash” and plagarized.

    Or how Obama said there were “57 states”.

  270. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:45

    Amity Shales needs to learn how to spell her own damn name.

  271. J— said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:46

    Austrian School means Salma Hayek—lots and lots of Salma Hayek—and I Love Von Mises to Pieces, but absolutely, positively no Schumpeter. Keep him out of the discussion at all costs!

  272. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:46

    I made a generic “Little Girl” t-shirt for the Doktorling when she was smaller.

    May contain the following: natural sweeteners (sucrose, fructose, glucose, lactose); permitted natural flavourings (cloves, nutmeg, cardamons, cumn, coriander, cinnamon); and Everything Nice.
    Assembled in New Zealand using organic materials & natural processes.
    CONTENTS MAY BE GENETICALLY MODIFIED

    As Washington said government is like fire–a dangerous servant and terrible master.
    The Googles could not provide me with a source for this oft-repeated line so I’m guessing that it was really Santayana.

  273. Johnny "Wet Start" McCain said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:47

    How many houses do I have again?

    Cindy?

    Anyone?

  274. Ronald Reagan said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:48

    The SS were victims, just as much as the Jews.

    Now look at this picture of me on a horse while I raise your taxes!

  275. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:49

    Rusty, is this yours?

    It has your name on it.

  276. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:49

    The difference is that Biden says dumb stuff accidentally, while Bachmann fully intends her stupidity.

  277. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:50

    B4, I can’t claim credit. I’m too lazy to put together a site like that.

  278. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:51

    Rusty, if you have a can of Bearwhiz Beer, that ought to be worth a bunch.

  279. @ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:52

    “The difference is that Biden says dumb stuff accidentally, while Bachmann fully intends her stupidity.”

    How the hell do you know? Biden talked about FDR on the TV with a straight face, but the MSM just ignored it. Meanwhile, Palin said you could see Russia from Alaska (a TRUE STATEMENT) and she was mocked endlessly. Bias, anyone?

  280. Rusty Shackleford said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:53

    No Bearwhiz, actor, but I have a full sixer of Billy Beer.

  281. Mark Foley (R)-FL (ex) said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:53

    how my favorite young stud doing

  282. Sarah Palin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:55

    Dinosaurs and humans walked the Earth at the same time.

  283. N.C. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:55

    Bias, anyone?

    Yeah, I’m biased towards thinking you’re a putz. Sit on it and spin.

  284. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:55

    coriander

    Know in some circles as… wait for it, wait for it-

    CILANTRO!!!11!1!

    evil cackling ensues

  285. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:56

    Clearly a phlegm/blood imbalance.
    I recommend more tax cuts leeches. Trust me. I’m a doctor.

  286. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:56

    Meanwhile, Palin said you could see Russia from Alaska (a TRUE STATEMENT) and she was mocked endlessly.

    She was, it’s true.

    Not because you can see Russia from Alaska, but BECAUSE SHE SAID THAT QUALIFIES HER TO BE A WORLD LEADER!

    OhmyfuckingGODcouldyouPULEEZgetafuckingclue,Nancy?????

  287. @ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:56

    “Dinosaurs and humans walked the Earth at the same time.”

    She never said that, either. Another lie, along with the book burning.

  288. Mark Foley (R)-FL (ex) said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:57

    you need a massage

  289. Sarah Palin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:57

    I believe the Earth is 6,000 years old.

  290. Sarah Palin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:58

    Abstinence only works! Just ask Bristol

  291. Sarah Palin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:58

    I read all the newspapers, except the parts about the Bush Doctrine.

  292. Sarah Palin said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:59

    In what respect, Charlie?

  293. Matt T. said,

    May 5, 2009 at 22:59

    Meanwhile, Palin said you could see Russia from Alaska (a TRUE STATEMENT) and she was mocked endlessly.

    To be fair, Sarah Palin provided a near endless sources of dumb shit to mock. Please make her the head of the GOP for the next four years, I for one could use the yuks.

  294. Mark Foley (R)-FL (ex) said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:00

    cool hope se didnt see any thing

  295. Bitter Scribe said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:00

    Biden talked about FDR on the TV with a straight face, but the MSM just ignored it.

    Meaning you found out about it…telepathically?

  296. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:00

    I cheated in law school and took kickbacks from credit card companies.

  297. Mark Foley (R)-FL (ex) said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:01

    Don’t forget to measure for me

  298. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:01

    I plagarized a speech from a British politician, word for word.

  299. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:01

    Biden talked about FDR on the TV with a straight face, but the MSM just ignored it.

    Excuse me, but didn’t this interview happen on, you know, Dan Rather’s old program????

  300. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:01

    Oh, and then there’s this little tidbit:

    “The Democratic vice presidential candidate’s mistake was picked up by the Associated Press and several other news organizations after the interview aired.”

  301. Mark Foley (R)-FL (ex) said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:02

    did any girl give you a haand job this weekend

  302. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:02

    I graduated near the bottom of my class.

  303. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:03

    She also believed she needed to be protected from witches through a blessing.

    Which is either evidence that Katie Couric isn’t a witch, or that guy was full of shit.

    Oh, the choices stress me so! One, the other, how to decide?!

  304. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:03

    Article I of the Constitution talks about the Executive Branch.

  305. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:03

    The French and NATO kicked Hizbollah out of Lebanon.

  306. Dick Cheney in June 2005 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:03

    The insurgency in Iraq is in its last throes.

  307. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:04

    The trolls today give me comfort in their desperation.

  308. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:04

    You can’t GO to a 7-11 or a Dunkin’ Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent!

  309. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:04

    I’m Vice President of the United States, following Obama’s decisive victory over John McCain and Sarah Palin.

  310. Smut Clyde said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:04

    I plagarized a speech
    Remember, class: ‘plagiarism’ without ‘I’ is a leading cause of epidemics.

  311. David Vitter said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:05

    Pampers, bitch!

  312. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:05

    Wow. The schaden really does freude itself!

  313. John Edwards said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:06

    Love child!

  314. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:06

    Abstinence only works!

    I prefer absinthe, that’s just me.

  315. George Bush said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:06

    I murdered hundreds of thousands of humans for oil co. & war profiteers. Mission Accomplished!

  316. Barney Frank said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    I paid a gay prostitute to fuck me up the ass.

  317. George W. Bush said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    I looked Putin in the eye. Found him to be straightforward and trustworthy. Got a sense of his soul.

    Now watch this drive!

  318. tigrismus said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    I guess school just let out in Teh Assland.

  319. Ted Haggard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    Yeah, but did you snort meth off *his* ass?

  320. Ronald Reagan said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    I dumped my first wife because she couldn’t suck cock as well as Nancy.

  321. PeeJ said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:08

    Twoofie sed:
    I graduated near as the bottom of my class.

  322. John Sidney McCain III said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:08

    I graduated nearat the bottom of my class.

  323. Ted Haggard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:09

    The second Mrs. Reagan did have quite the reputation in Hollywood for that talent.

  324. Bill Clinton said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:09

    I used to snort cocaine with my brother Roger while I was in the Governor’s mansion.

    I also used state troopers to round up women to have sex with me. But I support women’s rights!

  325. Johnny "Wet Start" McCain said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:09

    Ronald Reagan said,
    May 5, 2009 at 23:07

    I dumped my first wife because she couldn’t suck cock as well as Nancy.

    I feel you, RR. When they can’t get you hard anymore just what the fuck good are they?

  326. John Sidney McCain III said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:10

    My father and grandfather were successful admirals.

    I crashed six planes.

  327. Johnny "Wet Start" McCain said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:11

    Also, thank God for my daddy and granddaddy, or wrecking all those planes (not to mention the Forrestal unpleasantness) would have got me kicked out of the service before I could exploit my time as a POW.

  328. cowalker said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:11

    at 17:41 El Cid said,

    . . . . God only gets mad and intervenes when you touch His stuff without His permission. You can kill as many of His chosen people as you want, but just don’t open His Ark.

    .

    He must keep his journal in there.

  329. Bill Clinton said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:11

    I had phone sex with an intern the morning of my speech opening in the 1996 Olympics. Read the Starr Report!

  330. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:11

    The timing does support the “junior high let out for the day” theory.

  331. M. Bouffant said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:11

    Twoofie sed:
    I graduated near as the bottom of my class.

    PeeJ wins.

  332. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:13

    The timing does support the “junior high let out for the day” theory.

    You forgot detention.

  333. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:13

    Still obsessing over the Clenis™. Poor inadequate ‘Pubs.

  334. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:14

    Isn’t it great that the troll has to go all the way back to Barney Frank and Bill Clinton to try to trump a negligent parent of a single teen mom who can’t speak English?

  335. actor212 said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:14

    Mea culpa, Lil Pig, for the toe step.

  336. Bill Clinton said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:14

    I cost you libs the 2000 Election. If I had resigned, Al Gore would have won easily as a sitting President.

  337. LittlePig said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:16

    Mea culpa, Lil Pig, for the toe step.

    Well, kinda throws the whole ‘stealth’ thing out of the window.

  338. Big Bad Bald Bastard said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:17

    Wow. The schaden really does freude itself!

    The troll has the schaden without the freude.

    Now, in honor of Cinco de Mayo, here’s the best thing Robert Rodriguez did since El Mariachi. Except, of course, for that bit o’ teh n00dity by Salma Hayek in Desperado.

  339. Elliot Spitzer said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:17

    Don’t forget me!

    I’ll pay extra for a quick screw with no condom!

  340. Bill Clinton said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:18

    I had phone sex with an intern the morning of my speech opening in the 1996 Olympics which is more sex than most Republicans ever have.

  341. Laura Bush said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:19

    Please tell the Douglas family I’m a little sorry for murdering their son.

  342. George W. Bush said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:20

    I put the “W” in AWOL!

    And… done. Thanks, veal, tip, &c.

  343. The Truth said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:20

    Bookmark this, libs. Here is how it will go down.

  344. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:25

    for the love of his Noodliness, can anybody around here resist teh “Statements from Opposition figures” version of trolling?

    It’s very tiresome. I would say tres tiresome, if I wasn’t scared of starting the whole fake french thing up again.

  345. Principal Blackman said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:27

    Some see the dream ticket as Palin/Jindal.

    And some of those folks do so unironically! Note the banner at the top.

  346. Pere Ubu said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:37

    I remember the bad old days when people actually thought governments had a limited amount of money and couldn’t afford to indulge every idea, even ones that seemed attractive. Praise be to our Dear Leader, with whom all things are possible…for a while.

    You mean like giving tax cuts to the rich while at the same time prosecuting an agressive war against a country that posed no threat?

    Wow. The Irony.

  347. Al Gore said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:41

    I did fucking win the 2000 election, did you forget that, asshole?

  348. Joe Biden said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:44

    I quoted Neil Kinnock 100 times in speeches, forgot to attribute it once, and the right-wing noise machine hasn’t shut up about it to this fucking day!

  349. St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:48

    La souris est sous la chaise.

    Le chat se repose au-dessus de la chaise.

    Le singe est sur la branche.

    La souris est mangée par le chat.

    Le chat obstrue sur la souris.

    Le singe rit du chat.

  350. Lady Doctor Missus Marita said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:51

    Well if everyone else is going to wander off topic, I will too. I feel the need to complain:

    Bad Cold + Pregnancy = Serious Suckage

    Back to your regularly scheduled troll feeding.

  351. James G said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:55

    “Or how Obama said there were “57 states”.

    Actually he said Heinz has 57 varieties.

  352. Right-Wing Noise Machine said,

    May 5, 2009 at 23:59

    Silly Vice-President. Since when have we ever let anything drop, ever?

    Christ, we’re like a dog with an old shoe. We still bring up Jane Fonda and Chappaquiddick every chance we get.

  353. zombie rotten mcdonald said,

    May 6, 2009 at 0:05

    oo, Dr. MM, that has gotta be bad.

    In good news, Tom Tomorrow has a children’s book coming out:

    http://thismodernworld.com/4757

    Plus, some very weird bloggers have a weird alphabet:

    http://sayingyes.typepad.com/saying_yes/2009/05/were-already-up-to-p.html

  354. Smut Clyde said,

    May 6, 2009 at 0:27

    From the Tom Tomorrow link: I landed with a small publisher, Ig
    Another example of Ig-nominy.

    My Dad used to say, “beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes all the way to the bone.”
    My extensive observations allow me to say that this is not so.

  355. tigrismus said,

    May 6, 2009 at 0:48

    Now that you mention it, Dad was a chemist at the USDA for much of that era, and usually tested meat, so he may well have been talking about a different set of skin and bones.

  356. Smut Clyde said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:20

    I think I saw the documentary about your family.

  357. Cerberus said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:32

    I’m still constantly amazed at how accurate the lack of empathy theory is for explaining right wingers (of all varities, as if there were any difference between the fundies and the libertarians on substance). They really have absolutely no ability to begin to grasp that other people aren’t exactly like them and that opposing viewpoints aren’t a matter of applying their wants and desires to “evil” rather than “good”.

    It’s constatntly amazing how evident this principle is when they try and take down the assumed authority figures, assuming naturally that we are equally authoritarian in our hero worship and that legacy protection is the highest good. I think this is why they also see mockery as hate speech or “attacking” because when they pull the projection and the liberal looks at them sideways and begins cracking up, without that empathy to comprehend that another person may have a whole nother way of looking at the world, they have to justify it in their worldview. Thus, conspiracy theory filters wherein laughter are authoritarian counterattacks that are absent context.

    I would almost feel sorry for these people. What a frightening world it must be to be that horrendous and literally unable to escape themselves as they displaced that by sheer deficiency on everyone they met. I can empathize, but I can only imagine how horrific that’d be on a mind not protected by the layers and layers of delusion they use.

    On the original topic, I think we’re seeing the flare-up between the libertarian more money for the rich and the Rapture Ready crowd that has been threatening for awhile now. The Rapturists figured out that they were most of the base numbers and want some real control and the money crowd wants to block that not realizing that their own philosophy is just as discredited. As the base gets smaller, the Rapture crowd will have more and more power and I’m really hoping the money crowd keeps fighting the good fight so we can drown them both in the bathtub and allow a real leftist party to form.

  358. Two said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:38

    “Who to Rassilon’s tower would go, must choose above, between, below.”

  359. John Kerry said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:41

    Despite my being a multi-medal winning genuine war hero who went out of his way to seek out a combat assignment, my reprehensible opponent portrayed me as a coward and convinced a large number of credulous morons that this was so.

  360. John McCain said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:43

    I too am a war hero, but my opponent never once questioned it, and went out of his way to remind audiences all across America of my honorable service, while beating the paste out of me on the actual issues of which I had only the most tenuous grasp.

  361. John Kerry said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:46

    I faked my own injuries, exageratted my record, then lied before Congress about “war crimes” I could never substantiate. I also participated in a radical leftist group that once plotted the assassination of Richard Nixon, among other things.

    I’m also a giant fucking loser with no political future left. I wasn’t even picked for Secretary of State!

  362. Barack Obama said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:47

    I’ll be joining you in 2013, John!

  363. Jimmy Carter said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:48

    Don’t worry Barack, being a failed one termer isn’t so bad. You can make a career out of hating Israel, for example.

  364. Blago said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:48

    After you pardon me at the last minute of your failed term, Barack, you could even get a radio show!

  365. Tony Rezko said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:49

    Ohh! Don’t forget me!

  366. Rev. Wright said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:50

    Will you come back to my Church once you no longer have to pretend not to agree with my sermons for political reasons? It’s lonely under this bus!

    Oh, and GODDAMN AMERICA!!!!

  367. ACORN said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:50

    We’ll always welcome you, Barack! Help us commit vote fraud!

  368. Hans Von Spakovsky said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:57

    Ha. You think you know about voter fraud. The real election rigging action is on the inside.

  369. Ronald Reagan said,

    May 6, 2009 at 1:59

    I wasn’t sure I’d win, so I threw in a little treason by making a deal with a hostile foreign government holding American citizens to not release them until I was inaugurated.

    Later, I would sell them weapons. Meanwhile, the morons who support and venerate me criticize the guy I beat for being insufficiently supportive of Israel.

  370. John Kerry said,

    May 6, 2009 at 2:02

    I’m chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations committee. I have more policy influence than all federally elected Republicans combined.

  371. Newbie McNoob said,

    May 6, 2009 at 9:36

    Another way to see it would be as The Five Doctors, but instead of the first five guys who played Dr. Who, you hear that familiar scrapey, sireney sound, and out of a materialized Port-a-San comes Haley Barbour, Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, John McCain, and Mitt Romney.

    In one of the new series episodes, the Daleks planned the “destruction of reality itself”:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Journey's_End_(Doctor_Who)

    Sounds like the potential 2012 GOP platform to me.

  372. Newbie McNoob said,

    May 6, 2009 at 9:44

    I hate it when a link I post breaks. Oh well, copy and paste in address bar if you want to. Or skip it. Either way I can’t be arsed to repost it.

  373. J Neo Marvin said,

    May 6, 2009 at 16:02

    Don’t stop now, Republicans! Stay on this winning path!

  374. Newbie McNoob said,

    May 6, 2009 at 17:52

    …but instead of the first five guys who played Dr. Who, you hear that familiar scrapey, sireney sound, and out of a materialized Port-a-San comes Haley Barbour, Jeb Bush, Bobby Jindal, John McCain, and Mitt Romney

    Even though I’m not a Sarah Jane Smith fan, the above analogy is semi-tolerable so long as Sarah Palin isn’t likened to Sarah Jane Smith,

  375. George Bush said,

    May 6, 2009 at 19:33

    I knew terrorists were going to attack America, but I let it happen anyway.

  376. Wax Mundane said,

    May 6, 2009 at 19:50

    I have single handedly discovered the exact point of origin of the “Swine flu”.
    It’s Rush ” Radio Daycare” Limbaugh. Can anyone name a bigger, filthier Neo-con
    Fascist PIG? He’s the “Original Omnivorous Ungulate”.

  377. why are my ears ringing said,

    February 6, 2013 at 17:58

    I really like what you guys are up too. This kind of clever work and coverage!
    Keep up the excellent works guys I’ve included you guys to my personal blogroll.

Leave a Comment

  • Things of Interest

  • Meta Goodness

  • Clunkers

  • httpbl_stats()