24
Kyle Williams: About to Take Some Time Off to Spend With His Family
Kyle, if you don’t stop writing things like this, your days as a WorldNetDaily columnist will soon be over:
Unfortunately, being born in 1988 had its own share of disappointments. Paramount of these would be not being exposed the great literary accomplishment of Karen DeBrecht and her new children’s book, “Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed!” Looking back on it, I can see I could easily have become a partisan hack by the time I was 5. Apparently, Rush Limbaugh has given her book a rave review and the book has shot up the Amazon.com charts, but I have to ask: Is this a joke or are parents really going to teach their children liberals are monsters?
Memo to Kyle: this is not a good career move. Being a partisan hack sells. Look at Ben Shapiro: despite being a virgin, he’s just about the biggest whore for the Republican Party you’ll ever see.
Dr. BLT, The Song Blogger said,
September 24, 2005 at 18:09
I used to agree with the sentiments apparently expressed in this book. When I visited this site, it didn’t help matters much. My little social experiment seemed to support the notion that liberals engage in a technique known in Amish communities as “shunning,” where those who don’t use the right language and those who don’t conform are bitterly rebuked, called names like “troll,” and much worse, then ignored until they eventually leave. I even wrote and recorded a song about how bittterly sarcastic and cynical you all are, called (The Folks I Sadly Know) At Sadly, no!” But then I introduced a donate-to-download program whereby individuals can download for free songs I wrote and remakes of songs like City of New Orleans and Me & Bobby McGee, with new lyrics telling stories of the victims of the hurricane. And while a vocal minority condemned me, visciously berated the songs, and tried to discredit me, the apparently silent majority of you participated in my donate-to-download program. You gave, and then you downloaded my songs, even bringing up the demand for the songs so much that college radio stations began airing them. So, as a result, I took down the Sadly No song at my site. I realized that I had tried to generalize a stereotype I had of all of you based on a few, vocal, hostile individuals who hated me (mostly for my conservative views). Now the song no longer represents my sentiments and I have actually made good friends with some of you who have e-mailed me privately. The song is now a collector’s item, no longer available at my site, or anywhere else for that matter. I now apologize for assuming that you are all poisoned by the cyanide of cynicism. I appreciate your support for the songs and for the survivors of the hurricane. I encourage you to keep donating to a charitable organization of your choice (based on honor system), and then helping yourself to Blue Orleans, City of New Orleans, Me & Bobby McGee, or any of the other songs at my free mp3 jukebox:
http://www.drblt.com/freesong.htm or
http://www.drblt.com
THANKS AGAIN! I now give many of you the benefit of the doubt and declare, in opposition to the book depicted above, “Not all liberals are monsters!”
Jefe said,
September 24, 2005 at 21:40
First of all, let me say what an honor it is to follow Dr. BLT in the comment thread. Everybody give it up for the sandwich man.
Second, Brad writes:
“[Ben Shapiro's] just about the biggest whore for the Republican Party you’ll ever see.”
Uh, what about Jeff Gannon?
Brad R. said,
September 24, 2005 at 22:17
Uh, what about Jeff Gannon?
Touche!
Marq said,
September 25, 2005 at 0:08
Not on your life!
Dr. BLT said,
September 25, 2005 at 3:28
Jefe, no, I insist, the honor is all mine for having preceded you.
Jamsie said,
September 25, 2005 at 3:43
Has anyone bothered to introduce Dr. BLT and Marie? While a successful union between them could potentially produce some of the scariest spawn known to humankind, I think it might be worth it just to see what kooky ideas those two could come up with if they put their heads together!
Dr. BLT said,
September 25, 2005 at 7:59
Marie, would you like to join me in the studio to record a duet? Jamsie, are you down with being the producer?
Dr. BLT said,
September 25, 2005 at 8:50
Jamsie, you’ve really got my creative juices flowing now. We could call the song, “Shunned Like Amish Outcasts.” The idea would be to draw parallels in the song between the practices of the vocal minority at “Sadly, no!” (who do everything short of banning non-conformists from the site) and the practice held by elders in Amish communities known as shunning. The idea of shunning actually has survival value. In order to preserve the prevailing groupthink of the Amish colony, those who show signs of breaking from the prevailing ideology, rules of language, and codes of behavior, are ostracized, ignored, ridiculed, rebuked, and condemned for their idolatry. Then, if conformity does not resume, they are eventually cast out. Of course if I were to be cast out of this site, and forced to go from being a one-man band to one man, banned, that would present a real dilemma for the elders and protectors of the site, who want to be seen as die-hard advocates for free speech. So they grudgingly allow the conservative speech to continue “freely,” but attempt to break the spirit and the will of the nonconforming individuals, so they will simply shut up of their own accord and quietly disappear. No, coming to think of it, scrap that idea. That would be far too cynical a concept for a song. Maybe we should just succumb to the pressure, and conform to the prevailing liberal groupthink. The duet will have to wait. In the meantime, here’s a message for the beloved silent majority at Sadly, no! who support my music: Check out my duet with the lovely, if extremely liberal, Alyssa Kaess, and myself at http://www.drblt.com/freesong.htm
It’s called The Ballad of Johnny and June, and it tells the story of Johnny Cash and June Carter. Johnny Cash, by the way is my hero, not Rush Limbaugh, though Rush comes in a close second (the rock band that is).
chimera said,
September 25, 2005 at 9:34
and forced to go from being a one-man band to one man, banned,
heeee heeeeeeee! Good one, Sammich Doc!
I’m gonna have to check out your Ballad of Johnny and June; Johnny Cash is/was/forever will be incredible..
s.z. said,
September 25, 2005 at 10:03
Brad, I’m getting the idea that Kyle is trying to get WorldNetDaily to fire him, which shows that he’s ready to cut all his ties with wingnuttery — he’s certainly come a long way from the kid who used to be happy when people compared him to Rush Limbaugh.
Yes, Kyle is only 16, but he’s way more mature than columnists like Dr. Mike Adams can ever aspire to be. I am hoping that Kyle will come and speak at the Wingnuts Anonymous group I am starting up. (I thought that Doug Giles might be ready for the program, but recent developments have proved otherwise.)
Rowan Berkeley said,
September 25, 2005 at 10:10
Considering that one of the Twelve Steps is to make apologies to all whom one has wronged, I don’t know if a Twelve Step program for wingnuts is really wise. They should so just shut up.
GuinnessGuy said,
September 26, 2005 at 0:44
Terrifyingly enough, it seems that Kyle’s early literary experiances were similar to mine- the Chronicles of Narnia was my parent’s big thing, as Dr. Seuss was earlier. Tell us he watched Mr. Rodgers instead of the Power Rangers and I’ll be downright frightened.
Could it be that the long known but never fully understood lessons those books teach have finally started to make sense in his mind, as they did in mine (albeit at an earlier age in my case)?
That would kick ass- and if he says it, will Alan Keyes dismiss C.S. Lewis (a devout Catholic) as a “godless secularist”?
Only time will tell…
Bistroist said,
September 26, 2005 at 10:44
I see that GG has already been there, but did the rest of you see this?
Methinks there’s still hope for young master Williams.
Timmah420 said,
September 26, 2005 at 17:53
bwhahahahaha
The folks at sadly no was the only BLT song I have ever listened to (or plan on listening). I somehow had the amazing foresight to save a copy of the song, so it still exists and i’ll send it to anyone here if theres demand.
Although i really couldn’t understand why anyone would want it, while I will give BLT the satisfaction of knowing my friend liked it, I found it something akin to having a robot fucking me in the ear, was that recorded in an vet where they crush cats to death or were you just scraping metal against a chalkboard the whole song? (seriously i’m sure your other songs might be better but wtf, my poor goddam ears)
King Arthur said,
September 26, 2005 at 23:01
“We have found a witch, may we burn her?!”
She needs to be more careful, otherwise…
Dr. BLT said,
September 26, 2005 at 23:34
Timmah420, it looks like, (though the silent majority at this site now support my songs overwhelmingly), the song was a success in terms of creating the effect I intended it to have on the group I know refer to as the vocal minority. Though it may never be released (because it was also based on a false generalization on my part that all folks at this site are like you) you should have heard the dance mix.