25
Name That Stooge (Sunday Edition)
One of the persistent myths of wingnutdom is that newspapers intentionally delete the party affiliation of Democrats when they engage in chicanery but put that affiliation in 128 point bold when a Republican should be caught in one of those rare instances when a Republican engages in, say, page fucking or diaper sex with prostitutes. And if there’s anyone who’ll jump on the opportunity to parade around spouting this numbskull notion, you can always count on Scott Johnson, the laziest of the three stooges over at PouterLine.
In my copy of Saturday’s New York Times national edition (page A9), William Yardley reports on the disgrace of Portland’s openly homosexual Mayor Sam Adams. Adams admitted last week that he had a sexual relationship with a then-18-year-old male intern in the state legislature and that he had repeatedly lied about the relationship. …
I’ve read the Times story in my hard copy and online. I can’t find any reference to Mayor Adams’s party affiliation. It’s possible that I missed it, but Tim Graham indicates that the same obscurity afflicts the coverage of the Oregonian and the AP.
By contrast, no such obscurity affects the Times’s story on the indictment of former state senate majority leader Joe Bruno (page A15 of my copy of the national edition). The Times story is headlined “Longtime New York G.O.P. leader indicted by U.S. on corruption charges.”
Now you’d think that one of the Time Bloggers of the Year for 1908, who presumably won this distinction for his keen analytical ability, might not respond to this puzzling dilemma by simply shouting “see, they did it again!” Indeed a “Blogger of the Year, might even fire up ye olde Google and try to get to the bottom of the disparity. Sadly, as we say, no.
But to be fair to Scott, figuring out why Adams’s party affiliation wasn’t mentioned requires a two-step thought-process which is probably fairly challenging for a guy who once punctured his septum while picking his nose. So we can’t really expect Scott to stop for a moment and ponder first whether Portland holds a partisan election for the Mayor. What says Google? Well, my stars and stooges, it seems that Portland holds a non-partisan election for that position. All candidates run in one primary and the top two in the primary are in the general election.
Nor can we expect Scott to take the second step and wonder why, if a person wins a non-partisan election, they should or even could be identified by party affiliation, can we? Someone with a slightly sharper edge than Scott would understand that identifying a non-partisan mayor by his party affiliation is somewhat like mentioning the party affiliation of a blogger each time a newspaper reports his or her latest shenanigans, as in “Scott Johnson (R) piddled on himself yesterday in the ladies lingerie section of the Lake Minnetonka WalMart.”
Loneoak said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:05
As per the last thread, it might be more accurate to assume a political figure caught in a gay sex scandal is probably a Republican. How many Democrats other than Barney Frank have ever been busted in this regard?
Jennifer said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:19
The math on this is pretty simple: Democrats don’t get caught in gay sex “scandals” because 1) they don’t consider being gay to be a scandal so 2) they’re already out which 3) means they don’t have to go trolling airport bathrooms or seeking out impressionable youths who they can intimidate into silence as sex partners.
Not all that hard to figure out.
R. Porrofatto said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:34
What’s he worrying about? If there actually is a scandalous Dem whose party affiliation goes unmentioned in an article somewhere (and even if there isn’t) Fox News will falsely label at least a dozen GOP pederasts as Democrats to make up for it.
J— said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:42
I like the tie. Nice touch.
jurassicpork said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:49
Did someone say “stooge”? I got 50 of ‘em.
Assclowns of the Year #75:Diamond Jubilee/Inauguration Edition is now up, and this one is a doozy. Far from the weekly list of the top 10 assclowns of the week, this is a year-end retrospective of 50 of the biggest assclowns of 2008. A must-read.
PeeJ said,
January 25, 2009 at 21:56
To be honest, a republican couldn’t get elected doggie-doo-bagger in Portland.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:03
Sam Adams is a Democrat who made endorsements in Democratic primaries.
But then again, the media won’t identify the party ID of any Democrat in dispair. They didn’t do it for Spitzer, Paul Morrison, John Edwards.
Also.. interesting how Democrats who want to put terrorists in this country want to put them at Leavenworth, which is a threat to my life. But they won’t agree to put the terrorists on Alcatraz island, which is a secure prison.
But then again, Obama wants to punish the people who didn’t vote for him by putting them at risk for a terrorist attack.
owlbear1 said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:04
Oh yeah the Portland Democratic machine is a sight to behold.
PeeJ said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:04
One writer to the Oregonian editor opined that, it being Portland, being gay probably helped Sam get elected.
Also, there is no sex scandal here. There isn’t even a crime. Sam said he didn’t fuck the kid. But he did, after he was legal. He gave the wrong answer when asked about it. Fearing no one would believe he had not in fact molested an underage boyman, when asked whether they had boffed, he said “no.” The right answer would have been “I did not rape a 17 year old. Beyond that, it’s none of your fucking business.”
owlbear1 said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:05
But then again, Obama wants to punish the people who didn’t vote for him by putting them at risk for a terrorist attack.
snicker
His Grace said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:07
Yes Gary, we should keep all very dangerous people away from places like Leavenworth.
FlipYrWhig said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:13
Alcatraz has all kinds of catacombs and air-shafts and stuff, which makes it very easy to infiltrate and escape. I saw it in this documentary, “The Rock.”
Lesley said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:14
‘We had fun.’ George W. Bush sums up his time in office.
Lesley said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:17
Globe quotes are enjoyable today.
Jon said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:21
But then again, the media won’t identify the party ID of any Democrat in dispair. They didn’t do it for Spitzer, Paul Morrison, John Edwards.
What fool would need the party ID of Spitzer and Edwards pointed out? These two were national figures; it would be like pointing out that Bush is a Republican, were he caught in a similar situation.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:25
Sam Adams was the chief of staff to Portland mayor Vera Katz. Katz’s office included terrorist members of the Portland 7. Seeing as Adams was a chief of staff, he probably hired that person. So Adams has had judgment problems for a long time, from the time that he decided to become gay, through his entire political career.
What kind of “natural” lifestyle dooms people to always seek out vastly younger naive people? The vast majority of homosexuals go on to seek vastly younger partners. For example, Barney Frank has a taste for men 30 years younger than him.
Also, Leavenworth is not fit to house terrorists and it is too close to civilians. Only Guantanamo or Alcatraz are fit for the job.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:29
What fool would need the party ID of Spitzer and Edwards pointed out? These two were national figures; it would be like pointing out that Bush is a Republican, were he caught in a similar situation.
Bush has failed. Therefore, he is a liberal. There will be many right-wing funded stink tanks catapulting this propaganda, so it must be true.
bklyn said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:29
why does gary want to put terrorists in a federal park instead of a military prison like fort leavenworth?
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:35
Alcatraz is a secure institution that terrorists cannot escape from. Leavenworth is too easy to escape from, and the escapee would be far from Leavenworth after escaping.
Also, people live too close to Leavenworth, and putting terrorists there would destroy the local real estate market.
But, at least it would destroy Kathleen Sebelius’ political career, so it’s not a 100% bad idea. Just 99% bad with one good outcome.
tigrismus said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:45
But then again, the media won’t identify the party ID of any Democrat in dispair. They didn’t do it for Spitzer, Paul Morrison, John Edwards.
They did do it with Spitzer and Edwards in the articles I read. Don’t remember any on Morrison, but I bet you’re wrong there, too; I can set my Ethical/Reality compass by you because you ALWAYS point to True Wrong. I’ll tell you what WAS different: Democrats Spitzer and Morrison resigned, while Republicans Vitter and Craig didn’t. Maybe they set their compasses by you, too, just the other way ’round.
Matt T. said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:46
What kind of “natural” lifestyle dooms people to always seek out vastly younger naive people? The vast majority of homosexuals go on to seek vastly younger partners. For example, Barney Frank has a taste for men 30 years younger than him.
How much younger than John McCain is Cindy McCain? For that matter, how much older is Dennis Kucinich than his smokin’ hot old lady? And Barney Frank’s 68, for Christ’s sake. I’m 33 and the dew is long gone, son.
Galactic Dustbin Althouse said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:47
What kind of “natural” lifestyle dooms people to always seek out vastly younger naive people?
Yes, let us end the practice of ‘trophy wives’ now! Lets string up Fred Thompson!
Steerpike said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:47
One of the places that has been mentioned for Guantanamo inmates is the “Supermax” prison here in Colorado. This facility currently houses the likes of Ted Kaczinski (sp?), Ramsi Yousef and other dangerous criminals, but putting the “detainees” there (I hate that word, by the way–sounds like they’ve been temporarily inconvenienced–let’s call them what they are, “political prisoners”) would somehow be an unacceptable risk. Well, is it “Supermax” (“Super” maximum security) or isn’t it? If a bunch of rag-tag third world irregulars can escape, what business do we have putting anyone there?
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:48
So, when did Rod Blagojevich and Bill Clinton resign again?
Since you Dems want to play the “We resign during our scandals” card…
PeeJ said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:51
What kind of “natural” lifestyle dooms people to always seek out vastly younger naive people?
The widow Anna Nicole Smith wonders why you use that word, doom.
Fredrick Alphonse Kenneth Eagleton said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:51
Mr. Ruppert is correct. The Terrorist want to be shipped to American prisons so they can escape and infiltrate our communities and sneak into our houses and do unspeakable things to us.
…
…
….
and THAT’S BAD!!
Horrible
just awful….
…
yep, real bad…
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:52
Obama isn’t considering Supermax. It’s too rough for his terrorist buddies, yaknow.
Also, the percentage of homosexuals persuing partners who are 20-30 years younger (or underage) has to be way over 50%. Homosexuals are more prone to child molesting and such activities than normal people. They have to feed their depraved lifestyle somehow. Homosexuality is like drug addiction. Both destroy the body and mind of people involved.
Sirius Lunacy said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:52
Of course, heterosexual men NEVER seek out vastly younger naive female people. Um… those “barely 18″ web sites are so popular because the kids love em.
Matt T. said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:52
Since you Dems want to play the “We resign during our scandals” card…
Nah, I’d rather play the “Marrying someone significantly younger than you is horrible and depraved” card. I think the GOP should really run with that one, along with “Everyone does not deserve health care” and “We support the troops except we won’t fund the VA nor will we adaquately equip soldiers in the field” cards. And Sarah Palin. She’s a keeper.
Davis said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:54
Whatever happened to the real Gary Ruppert? I miss him.
Matt T. said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:56
Thirty-eight is underaged? For Henry Hyde, mabe…
sgwhiteinfla said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:57
Gary Ruppert
Are you one of those ocwardly Republicans who beat their chest when talking about going to war or torturing people but then start pissing your pants at the prospect of having those terror suspects whose torture you were just cheerleading coming to a prison near you? Say it aint so Gary. Surely you and your Faux Nooz tough guy friends can just watch some more episodes of 24 and figure out how to make sure they don’t build a plane inside a supermax facility while on 23 hour lock down and then fly it into your house. Just think WWJBD?
I swear man its amazing how willing the Republicans are to show just how weak kneed and cowardly they really are over this issue. They are starting to make Harry Reid look like MacArthur
PeeJ said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:58
That has to be the lamest assertion shoving I’ve seen in a damn long time.
Homosexuality is like drug addiction
Yes it is. I can’t get enough of either.
tigrismus said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:58
Well, Gary, I didn’t actually say that, but Blagojevich is a nut and Clinton didn’t do anything. To be perfectly frank, I’m not in the “folks should resign for sexual dalliances” crowd, but then I’m not a member of the “Moral Majority/Character Counts” party. See how that works? If YOU say some ethic is vitally important and I don’t, YOU are expected to act accordingly, NOT ME.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:59
the difference between a younger woman marrying an older man and a younger man having sex with an older man is that the traditional relationship can lead to children and happyness. The gay relationship only leads to the twisting of another person and more destruction.
So, why is Sam Adams seeking out 18 year olds anyways?
Sirius Lunacy said,
January 25, 2009 at 22:59
“Homosexuality is like drug addiction. Both destroy the body and mind of people involved.”
That’s why we beat our wives into submission and pump our kids full of Ridilan, to protect them from the evils of drug addiction and homosexuality.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:01
“Clinton didn’t do anything”
other than adultery. Which is what David Vitter is accused of doing.
Clinton also committed perjury and obstructed justice. He shouldn’t be a global jetsetter now, he should be in jail for his crimes.
owlbear1 said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:02
That’s not Gary!
That’s The Twit!
PeeJ said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:02
Gary, let me throw you a bone, so to speak. If you want to make provocative assertions in your trolling, you should avoid making those assertions that are quickly, easily, thoroughly, factually debunked.
Good gawp man! Either put some effort into it, or some cleverness (yeah, I know, I know) or come back when you’ve had some more practice.
Matt T. said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:03
Clinton also committed perjury and obstructed justice. He shouldn’t be a global jetsetter now, he should be in jail for his crimes.
Say, there’s a thought. Were Clinton’s alleged crimes jailable, wouldn’t he be out by now?
Smut Clyde said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:06
other than adultery. Which is what David Vitter is accused of doing.
Not only has Gary decriminalised prostitution, he has gone back into history to rewrite the charges against Vitter. I am in awe at his powers and can only hope that he does not choose to misuse them.
bklyn said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:11
gary can also make alcatraz a secure prison even though it hasn’t been an actual prison in 45 years. and an actual prison at a military fort is easily escapable by those wily terrorists.
Fozzetti said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:15
Ya know, I read about the Portland politico and I also noticed no party affiliation. MY conclusion: Probably Repub, especially probable if its an AP article. Then I forgot the whole sad story. Till now. I admit, if I’d really wanted to know I’d have used the GoogleTubes. Very useful they are!
pedestrian said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:17
Also, the percentage of homosexuals persuing partners who are 20-30 years younger (or underage) has to be way over 50%.
I know a little something about this, because I spent some time as a homeless gay teenager who had been dumped by his Christian parents and had an unhealthy attraction to men who were too old for me. It isn’t as easy as it sounds. I’m not going to make up numbers like Gary, but I would say that a healthy majority of the 40-somethings I pursued were only into guys their own age. And this was on the intertubes, where all the perverts hang out.
The older men who did hound after me were basically like children who had never grown up. They had wasted their formative years trying to be straight, and were trying to recapture their youth with someone younger. That or they saw youth as status and it was a power trip.
El Cid said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:18
Yeah, but we all know that “non-partisan” means Democrat, except when it don’t.
Jennifer said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:18
“Clinton didn’t do anything”
other than adultery. Which is what David Vitter is accused of doing.
Uh, no. Vitter committed adultery with a prostitute, and prostitution is illegal – on both the part of the prostitute and the customer. Let’s try again:
Clinton also committed perjury and obstructed justice.
Perjury is defined as lying under oath about a fact germane to the case under review. A question about whether a man sexually harassed a woman who could technically be considered an “employee” really has nothing to do with whether or not the same man had consensual sexual relations with a different woman. Most men have consensual sexual relations with women; some of them sexually harass other women at work, most of them don’t. The (Republican-appointed) judge pretty much said as much when she dismissed the sexual harassment suit as being without merit – which makes a question about consensual sexual activity even less relevant. This is why he wasn’t charged with perjury, because it wasn’t perjury.
He shouldn’t be a global jetsetter now, he should be in jail for his crimes.
I’m not aware of anyone losing a house or a job because Clinton got a blowjob or because he lied about it. Other than Bob Livingston and Newt Gingrich, anyway!!! Heh heh. It wasn’t a jailable offense. Get the fuck over it.
His Grace said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:20
I don’t understand how the terrorists are infinitely more dangerous at a military installation at Leavenworth than a military installation at Guantanamo…. Are they wizards or something and Kansas is too close to a power point?
pedestrian said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:20
the difference between a younger woman marrying an older man and a younger man having sex with an older man is that the traditional relationship can lead to children and happyness.
I guess it’s possible, if you like having a 90 year old father and a gold digging mom.
Jacob Singer said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:20
This is the worst Gary yet. Next!
owlbear1 said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:21
Has Obama been floating the idea of Leavenworth?
That would indicate to me that he intends all of the terror suspects to remain under the military justice system and not the U.S. courts.
Galactic Dustbin Althouse said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:21
gay relationships can lead to children and happiness. ( although I know some people who would say that kids and happiness are in no way linked). Or are you saying that hetros who never have kids or adopt are perverts?
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:26
Are they wizards or something and Kansas is too close to a power point?
No, they did repeatedly escape from Gitmo and go ravaging around Cuba keying those beautifully-maintained 1950s Cadillacs that people drive down there, and stealing cigars. Then the American soldiers would wander over and catch them again, punking the comically inept commie Cuban police.
It is a fact well known to those who know it well that no prison can hold an accused terrorist. The news just never reported it because of liberal bias.
Smut Clyde said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:26
the traditional relationship can lead to children
Hang about, I thought Gary was trying to support traditional trophy-wife relationships.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:27
I know some people who would say that kids and happiness are in no way linked…
For my own part, I think there would be a mutual-exclusion kind of thing going on. I will never find out for sure.
Smut Clyde said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:30
Then the American soldiers would wander over and catch them again, punking the comically inept commie Cuban police
Give that man the green light for his movie script.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:38
“Perjury is defined as lying under oath about a fact germane to the case under review.”
No, it’s defined as lying under oath.
“Has Obama been floating the idea of Leavenworth?
That would indicate to me that he intends all of the terror suspects to remain under the military justice system and not the U.S. courts.”
It’s a very real possibility. Especially since putting them in US civilian courts means they get out on bail and then escape to never be seen again.
“I don’t understand how the terrorists are infinitely more dangerous at a military installation at Leavenworth than a military installation at Guantanamo”
there is no way to escape Guantanamo. You can’t jump a fence to Cuba or swim out because it’s not possible.
Put them in Leavenworth, then they tunnel out, and go on to execute attacks all over the midwest.
The fact is that a terrorist attack on America in the last four years is probably 100% likely due to Obama’s soft stand on terrorism.
tigrismus said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:41
Vitter, like Spitzer, visited prostitutes, which is illegal; Clinton did not. As for Clinton’s “crimes”, the Clinton perjury charge would never have stood up in court, as he believed he didn’t have sex according to the shitty incomplete legal definition of sex given by Paula Jones’s lawyers, which is why it wasn’t pursued. And what obstruction? He testified, which he shouldn’t have, and didn’t keep anyone else from doing so. YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT as per usual.
None of this has anything to do with the point, though. I’ll try again with an analogy: if you’re pro-life and I’m pro-choice, it would be hypocritical for you to get an abortion, but not for me to get one. Get it? I wouldn’t think you immoral for getting an abortion, because I’m not pro-life, but I would think you’re a hypocrite, and if you tried to stay on your moral high-horse after I’d think you were not just a hypocrite but also an asshole. You are the party who makes a big deal about all this, so don’t get pissy when we notice you don’t practice what you preach, and for Christ Almighty’s sake quit lambasting US for not practicing what YOU preach that WE DON’T BELIEVE IN.
WereBear said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:41
The older men who did hound after me were basically like children who had never grown up. They had wasted their formative years trying to be straight, and were trying to recapture their youth with someone younger.
True insight, pedestrian, and it works for straights as well.
In that case, it would be men who “wasted” their formative years either struggling to stay faithful, or sneaking around, and are ready for a trade-in.
Of course, there are the many who don’t grow up at all, and their pursuit of young, naive, women continues until their hearts or their bank accounts give out.
Jennifer said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:43
No, it’s defined as lying under oath.
No, dumbass, it isn’t.
See first paragraph re: “material and relevant to the case.”
Oregon Guy said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:43
A couple of points:
The US Army Disciplinary Barracks at Fort Leavenworth was recently rebuilt. The new barracks (er, prison) is of pretty much the same design as the Supermax in Florence, Colorado.
Leavenworth:
http://usacac.army.mil/CAC2/usdb/
Florence:
http://www.bop.gov/locations/institutions/flm/
Accused individuals probably have more procedural rights under the Uniform Code of Military Justice than they would in the civilian system and certainly more than they would before a “military commission.”
These are both big improvements, if true.
tensor said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:43
While Gary Ruppert 128.0 is a screaming bore, he does nicely capture the ethos of what we used to call the Republican Party. No Republican can ever do anything wrong, even when they violate the very moral preaching they use to sucker rubes like Gary. It’s a truly scary dynamic: we have fellow citizens who want politicians to lie to us, so long as the liars refuse to take any responsibility for lying.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:47
testimony about sexual relations with employees is important to establish a pattern of conduct that makes sexual harassment a certainty for the Jones case.
If there’s an America left in 2012, it will elect a Republican to replace Hussein Obama
Jacob Singer said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:47
I love this idea that Scary Bad Terrorists are gonna spring a masterful escape from Leavenworth and then hang around Kansas to terrorize the yokels.
I hope they hit the Creationism Museum first.
Still, don’t sweat it Gary, I doubt you’ll ever have to serve one at the drive-thru.
Fozzetti said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:49
HaHaHa! Can you imagine the reaction if Obama announced that he was going to send the Gitmo prisoners to ALCATRAZ? Oh, How I wish he would!
Johann said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:50
Y’all remember the Gary Ruppert shout-out from Amy Alkon? I do.
Man, that was funny.
Oregon Guy said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:50
Hell, I’m on the verge of calling Real Gary.
Jennifer said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:50
testimony about sexual relations with employees is important to establish a pattern of conduct that makes sexual harassment a certainty for the Jones case.
No, dumbass, it isn’t. A person’s consensual sex life in no way can prove or disprove a charge of sexual harassment, for the very simple basic reason that consensual sex is the opposite of sexual harassment, which even an earthworm could understand.
Oregon Guy said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:51
Johann:
What? Please elaborate – I missed it.
His Grace said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:52
I’m just trying to keep track of things here. Gitmo is impregnable since the terrorists lack the ability to swim and hop fences, yet they are masters of invisible digging, dirt hiding, seamstressry/disguise and at acquiring explosives while being chased by the military and law enforcement. Wow Gary, are you sure Gitmo can hold them? Maybe we need to build some sort of penal colony on the moon.
Fozzetti said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:56
I suppose Gary & Friends fear other terrorists will attack the prison with BLACK HELICOPTERS and guys in ski masks and turbans, and and and explosives, and maybe even nukes! Then they’ll kill everyone in the vicinity of 10 miles. Then they’ll go somewhere to celebrate.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:57
Maybe we need to build some sort of penal colony on the moon.
That’s even worse! What’s between the Earth and the moon? Vacuum – which is just a word for nothing! Nothing would stand between these hyper-terrorists and the entire Earth!!!!!!1
WereBear said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:59
Hmm, Alcatraz would then be impregnable since the terrorists lack the ability to swim and hop fences.
Unless, of course they had access to raincoats, toilet paper, and soap.
But get that taken care of, and I think we’re golden.
owlbear1 said,
January 25, 2009 at 23:59
we have fellow citizens who want politicians to lie to us, so long as the liars refuse to take any responsibility for lying.
It’s so situational tho, if the lie is about mass death and destruction. SHHHHH!
but if the lie is about sharing body fluids. OMG! TEH HORROR!
I wonder why that is.
owlbear1 said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:02
Maybe we need to build some sort of penal colony on the moon.
Harsh, Mister!
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:03
The older men … trying to recapture their youth with someone younger.
Standard attitude among most middle age gay guys I know goes like this:
“I’d like to fuck that cute young guy over there. But he’d probably want to try to have a conversation. And that’s too painful to contemplate.”
I used to say it was good to be a chickenhawk because chicken is “anyone younger than me” and thus, there would always be an increasing supply. But when I used to say that sort of thing, I was myself recently considered chicken.
J— said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:04
Oregon Guy: Amy Alkon discovers the truth about Sadly, No! and Gary Ruppert.
Loneoak said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:07
So, why is Sam Adams seeking out 18 year olds anyways?
To fuck them.
This was easy answers to questions asked by morons, part eleventybillion.
Djur said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:10
I am no great fan of Sam Adams (due to issues with his personal and managerial style and certain right-wing deviations like supporting drug-free zones) but this is a complete mountains-from-molehills situation.
And I’m sure Adams is a Democrat — Vera Katz was — but he’s never run for a partisan office and it would be improper to identify him by party affiliation.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:12
Sez Rug-burn:
Is it willing to apply this to certain other criminals? One of whom will be drinking himself to death in a Dallas neighborhood (we can only hope) rather than “jetsetting,” but you know what I mean.
Loneoak said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:14
Gary, why are you so anti-American? Just because you are chickenshit pants-pooper scaredy-cat shouldn’t mean that you cannot trust the military police to keep a bunch of half-starved elderly and teenaged chumps in a cage. Gawd, you are such a fucking cowardice-stuffed sack of fear.
Has Obama been floating the idea of Leavenworth?
That would indicate to me that he intends all of the terror suspects to remain under the military justice system and not the U.S. courts.
Does he mean the federal penitentiary or the military prison? Anyone know?
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:15
Mmm, great point, but if they had self-awareness, this mayhem would be over like, thirty years ago.
Smut Clyde said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:15
why is Sam Adams seeking out 18 year olds
You have to seek out 18-year-olds in the US?! What, are they all kept in separate neighbourhoods or something? You lucky sods. In NZ the little bastards are allowed out into the wider community, where they steal the jobs of proper citizens and flaunt their non-baldiness.
Also they wear their trousers down around their hips, listen to music without any tunes, and they get on my grass. Hmph.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:17
That is an entirely appropriate way to reacst the it as the only place he could jet to/from would be Argentina. Without taking too many chances, I mean.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:17
That is an entirely appropriate way to recast it as the only place he could jet to/from would be Argentina. Without taking too many chances, I mean.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:19
Does the “real” (or “virtually” real, in that he had a Facebook pg., or Republican Dating entry, or someone found a Republican operative by that name somewhere) G. Rot-Brain live in Kansas?
As he seems to have it in for Gov. Sibelius. (The Anti-Palin.)
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:21
Whose music I’ve always dug.
Better her than Arnold, if you must elect a “creative” type as your gov.
Gary Ruppert said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:26
Nope, I live in the Kansas City suburban area in Missouri. I used to live in Johnson County, Kansas but that area was too insanely liberal. I grew up in New York City and got out as soon as possible.
Hoosier X said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:26
Are all Republicans eager to turn America into a Nation of Bed-Wetters? Or is it just the Republicans who talk, serve in Congress or post on this site?
Rusty Shackleford said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:29
I grew up in New York City and got out as soon as possible.
Yeah, nobody wants to live in that hellhole. That’s why the cost of living there is so low compared to Kansas City.
Another kiwi said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:30
What will happen when the be-turbaned and , I suspect, mustachioed terrorists escape from the Halliburton cardboard boxes that they have been put into and discover the hordes of sexually promiscuous 18 year old Democrats milling around trying to be picked up by Mayors-of-no-political-affiliations?
They will rush back into said cardboard boxes begging to be re-incarcerated so as to protect their strictly religious and insane, yet coldly calculating, minds.
Being Ruprecht means never having to say “hello” to Mr. Brain
Gary Ruppert said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:36
While the New York Yankees are the best team in baseball and will win the World Series. Queens or New York City isn’t really that great a place to live in, unless you love crime, corrupt leftist government, and being cramped. I prefer having a yard out here instead of being 300 feet in the air in a tiny box for thousands a month.
Anyways, my vote counted this time. That wouldn’t have been the case at all in New York, where the far left has seized power.
I like the weather better here than if I would have just moved to New Jersey or Staten Island.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:38
This almost implies a support of drug-filled zones. Any news on that?
Mooser said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:39
The fact is that a terrorist attack on America in the last four years is probably 100% likely due to Obama’s soft stand on terrorism.
Well, it looks like Obama has done a good job, then!
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:42
I’d say it’s probably !00% likely myself, but I wouldn’t want to go out on a limb or anything.
Djur said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:44
I’m doing my part.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:47
[Holding hands three mins. apart] Ooooh, missed it by that much!
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:51
How about a terrorist attack in the last 8 years, Gary?
Simba B said,
January 26, 2009 at 0:58
If this Gary is honest about living in Kansas City, he’s not the “real” Gary Ruppert.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:00
Figure this one out:
OK, the “far left” has seized power (by voting). So it moves to suburban KC where its vote will count (be the same as everyone else’s)?
From sheer Sunday p. m. boredom (“Where NFL games?”) can anyone tell us about the non-Bizarro World© version of
Curious as to its definition of “insanely liberal.”
Simba B said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:01
The Facebook profile we found a while back (which I still have screenshots of, oddly enough) claimed Indianapolis. I don’t know if he’s the Ur-Gary or not but I had a brief exchange with him (he sent me a friend request on Facebook) and he seemed to be a genuine conservative/Republican, ie. not a parody troll.
Gavin has said he knows where the real Gary lives, and his e-mail and IP addresses, such as they were. But in keeping with the management policies here he has never disclosed that information.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:09
Per Wikipedia, Johnson County KS holds this distinction: In 2008 CNN/Money and Money magazine ranked three cities in Johnson County on its list of the “100 Best Cities to Live in the United States.”
Those lying commie bastards!
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:12
Ah, filthy w/ “limousine liberals.” Perhaps more envy than political difference.
Not that I give a fig about who the real or un-real Gary may (or may not) be. But geography is often informative.
Doctorb said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:23
Look, it’s okay for Gary Ruppert in 2009 to be obsessed with Bill Clinton’s penis, and where the Clenis has been that it maybe shouldn’t have, and what the Clenis Support System said about said Clenis-positioning after the fact. But shit, man, “Bill Clinton got a beejay” should be right up there with “Chappaquiddick!” and “dead Chicago voters” and whatever the hell else, which is to say ignored.
FlipYrWhig said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:23
Per Wikipedia, Johnson County KS holds this distinction: In 2008 CNN/Money and Money magazine ranked three cities in Johnson County on its list of the “100 Best Cities to Live in the United States.”
Aha! The Terrorists are using Money magazine to determine their next terroristical target, starting by finding which pleasant cities are closest to notoriously lax federal prisons! Dig slowly, put up some girlie posters to conceal your handiwork, then it’s, pow, take that, Kansas, hotbed of capitalist decadence!
His Grace said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:25
Well, IIRC Show-Me Gary showed up here around the 2006 elections… The “real” Gary Ruppert was here earlier and I thought only cut and paste diatribes off right wing nut sites. There was little if not any interaction with the commenters.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:37
On my last visit to Wichita (granted, it’s no Eternal Kansas City) I shared an elevator with a man who had a t-shirt with a picture of a worse-for-wear fetus on it.
Kinda put a damper on the whole roast beef thing, for which Kansas is justly known.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:41
Dig slowly, put up some girlie posters to conceal your handiwork, then it’s, pow, take that, Kansas…!
That no longer works. They disallowed girlie posters after those bedam liberal sexual harrassment rules said that the posters create a hostile environment.
Marc A said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:43
How’s this for a reason why Sam Adams’ affiliation wasn’t mentioned and Bruno’s was: Bruno holds a partisan poition and Adams a NON-paritsan one. Mayor of Portland, like many positions in Oregon, is not elected by party.
Loneoak said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:56
Curious as to its definition of “insanely liberal.”
Can say the word vagina without sniggering or tut-tutting.
Steerpike said,
January 26, 2009 at 1:59
Actually, Obama is considering Moving the prisoners to Supermax. And naturally Constipated Conservatives are worried this would put the area in danger as a potential terrorist target. Never mind the fact that Ramsi Yousef and Sheikh Abdel Rahman have been there for years without incident.
Hoosier X said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:01
Hee hee hee.
You said “vagina.”
He hee hee.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:05
Snigger, snigger.
(Is that right? Something looks “funny” about it.)
I should stick w/ the tut-tutting, maybe.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:13
The guy who animated the “Whammy” on the game show Press Your Luck is Savage Steve Holland, who directed Better off Dead.
Once I get on Wikipedia, I’m like an addict, I swear.
The sad part is, half the trivia I know is too trivial to do me any good on Jeopardy.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:13
Steerpike: link NG. Couldn’t find the story on the site. Help!
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:16
The guy who animated the “Whammy” on the game show Press Your Luck is Savage Steve Holland, who directed Better off Dead.
How about that. My wife and I just watched “Better Off Dead” last week in a fit of 1980s-pop-culture nostalgia.
Do they make teen movies that unabashedly goofy anymore?
Smut Clyde said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:16
I should stick w/ the tut-tutting, maybe.
I prefer to tsk-tsk, in the fond belief that it means something obscene in ?Kung.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:21
For me, the only teen movies remotely watchable are the ones by Savage Steve Holland.
Well, there’s the ones where teens have sex and get murdered, but most of those are lousy, too.
Steerpike said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:36
Sorry for the bad linky. Try This one
Anne Laurie said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:40
To be honest, a republican couldn’t get elected doggie-doo-bagger in Portland.
“Mr. Ruppert, when I said ‘properly disposed of’, I did *not* mean by smearing it on the walls, or selling it to the public-school lunch program. No, I don’t CARE that you find it ‘tasty and nutritious’ — ugh, take that out of your mouth right now! And stop trying to grab my dog’s crotch!… “
Ed Marshall said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:52
The “real” Gary Ruppert was here earlier and I thought only cut and paste diatribes off right wing nut sites. There was little if not any interaction with the commenters.
Nah, that’s real Gary. He was a drive-by player at Sadly No! but this is the guy I remember from Atrios circa 2003. Thick-skulled and impervious to thought as ever. I drink his tears in the new dawn of Obamunism.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 2:54
Thanks, Steerpike. And blame WordPress, don’t apologize.
As far as I’m concerned, send ‘em to Florence. When they use their magic flying prayer rugs to escape, they’ll be close enough to Colorado Springs to slaughter all the Xian infidels there.
Sammy said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:03
Perhaps he should purify himself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:11
I don’t like WordPress. This is why.
Why Gary left NYC (or Queens) for the heartland of fly-over country.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:13
Preview, what is wrong w/ you?
You break my heart, then you come through.
henry lewis said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:22
Preview, what is wrong w/ you?
You break my heart, then you come through.
O Preview.
Why do you do me like you do?
SomeNYGuy said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:42
Dear A COld Lake,
Go jump in one. Thanks.
Fozzetti said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:55
Gary: “…Nope, I live in the Kansas City suburban area in Missouri…”
Sooooo…. is everything up-to-date there? Do you like the Burly-Q? Can you walk the privy in the rain and never wipe your feet?
Simba B said,
January 26, 2009 at 3:56
Ok. I’m going to break a self-imposed ban on this topic to say this one thing—don’t feed the troll. No, really. DON’T FEED THE FUCKING TROLL. Don’t talk about him, his posts, or even acknowledge his existence. It does seem we are doing better, but seriously—this is what gets his rocks off, when we acknowledge his existence. Even if you are not addressing the subject matter of his posts, if you reply to him in any way—that gives him a little Troofie boner. No one wants that.
He probably doesn’t realize it himself, or he doesn’t believe it, but all you guys have to do is outlast him, and he’ll get blue balls and go somewhere else. And I’ll bet he’s a little attention horndog, and it won’t take much to rid ourselves of him.
This is a tough bunch; we can outlast this little dipshit easily.
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:03
More Single White Female, huh?
Boring.
SomeNYGuy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:04
Fozzetti, it’s “never WET your feet.” I’m sure Oscar Hammerstein would have endorsed ALWAYS wiping your feet after a visit to the outhouse.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:07
Simba, we are desperately bored because production is down around here: Once we’ve deconstructed & punned to death any of the red meat placed out for us, we must turn on ourselves, or the trolls. Better the trolls than each other. And better not to engage them. But …
tigrismus said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:07
I’d just like to point out to no one in particular that malicious non-obvious name-stealing has resulted in the stealer being banned here before. It’s possibly permissible if it’s funny, but a certain someone doesn’t seem quite able to swing funny. Ever.
opie_jeanne said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:08
I know this is way off topic, but does anyone remember seeing an amusing essay written by a gentleman who was once a fan of Ayn Rand’s philosophy and was invited to her salon, and became an unfan as a result? He described his interview with her as a series of attacks, and the slavishness of her acolytes who agreed with her every word.
I can’t remember who the author was or when I saw the link here (I’m pretty sure it was here), maybe in October around the 9th, which I haven’t been able to locate.
Help please?
Fozzetti said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:08
Oh, Dang! Wet yer feet it is. But I beg Gary doesn’t. Wipe his feet, I mean.
Fozzetti said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:09
I BET Gary doesn’t wipe his feet.
SomeNYGuy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:13
Actually, I suspect Gary’s every trip to the bathroom results in wet feet.
Snowwy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:17
I knew a thing named Preview
I guess you could say it was a post-fiend
I met it on a website splash page
Captivating all the geeky teens
It said “How’d ya like to waste some time?”
And I could not resist
When I saw that Preview line.
George Smiley said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:17
“Actually, Obama is considering Moving the prisoners to Supermax. And naturally Constipated Conservatives are worried this would put the area in danger as a potential terrorist target.”
Well, let’s face it: the coasts have done yeoman duty in taking the brunt of the Terrorist Threat. It’s long past time for the Heartland to step up and take some of the risk. Ruppert, most of all…
ahem said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:20
There was a Ruppert that seemed real enough who was traced to a pig-sexing college in Arizona. That may be the ur-Ruppert, but until the payroll for GOP semi-pro trolls is revealed in court, we can only speculate.
Bookmark This, Liberals said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:22
Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.
My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.
Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:22
If we don’t move the suspected terrorists to Colorado, how ever are the Wolverines going to form?
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:23
Stop that. It didn’t care about that election to start with, it just thought that would be annoying. And now, months later, it finally has become annoying because of reposting it every goddamn thread it appears in.
Cletus von Clausewitz said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:36
I think we should incarcerate detainees in the basement of the Alamo.
Candy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:37
Does he mean the federal penitentiary or the military prison? Anyone know?
I guess I’m not up on my prison studies. I didn’t even know there were two Leavenworths.
SomeNYGuy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:44
More than two, if you remember to count One- through Tenworth.
Cletus von Clausewitz said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:47
There is only one Leavenworth. The other one is Twelveworth. If you drive the Topeka toll road for five hours, you leave Deuceworth.
SomeNYGuy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:48
And well worth the effort, too.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:52
The prison that goes to Elevenworth. Awesome.
Candy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:53
Hmmmmm. I’m very tired and hungover. This is all sailing right o’er me head. There must be a tradition of which I am not aware.
Candy said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:54
Oh. Oh. Now I get it. D’oh.
My excuse is that I drank a lot of Steel Reserve last night. Really.
Steerpike said,
January 26, 2009 at 4:56
Now, I always thought “leaving a deuceworth” was a hip eupemism of the euphemism “going number two”
tigrismus said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:07
Now, I always thought “leaving a deuceworth” was a hip eupemism of the euphemism “going number two”
And speaking of loaves, isn’t “ye olde Leavenworth” the amount of yeast required to raise one loaf of bread?
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:07
opie_jeanne: I’m using all my powers (google fu) to track it down. In the meantime, I’ll share this one I hadn’t encountered before: “Ayn Rand – the Anne Coulter of philosophy”
Steerpike said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:11
We can have even more fun with “Deuce of Spades” and (ew) “Flopping Deuces”
Teh Internets said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:13
Oh. Oh. Now I get it. D’oh.
Man, people are gaining awareness of our traditions as fast as we can get them out the door.
Cletus von Clausewitz said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:18
Steerpike said, January 26, 2009 at 4:56
Now, I always thought “leaving a deuceworth” was a hip eupemism of the euphemism “going number two”
yes, steerpike, your analysis is correct. ( sigh. )
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:18
Steel Reserve? The one that refers to specific gravity on the big ol’ can? Eeeeekk/Eeeeww!
Steerpike said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:25
fine, color me dense
Cletus von Clausewitz said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:31
I’ve spent weeks and months in Topeka, Manhattan-Junction City metroplex, Wichita, Salinas, Great Bend, Hayes, and Dodge City. I’m confident that the jayhawkers can muster up gumption to stand up to al queda since they stood up to Quantrill. quit yer f**king whining, ruppert.
Bina said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:45
O rly?
My gay best friend, who is legally married to his long-time partner (they’ve been living together since we were all at univeristy) picked someone the same age as himself. His words to me, shortly before he and his hubby met, were, “If I’m gonna be gay, I’m gonna be gay with someone my OWN age!”
Oh, and their marriage has also led to children. Two sons, legally adopted in the state of Minnesota.
So, Gary, in short, SUCK IT.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:48
I grew up in New York City and got out as soon as possible.
Typical of the the Bedwetter Brigaders – run away! run away!
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:56
I saw that movie back in high school in D.C.
It changed my entire life!
Candy said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:57
Steel Reserve has a high alcohol content and it’s cheap. Everything else is a minor consideration at this point, M. Bouffant. It was SR or Natural Ice. $6.99 a twelve pack. Need I say more?
Honestly, it doesn’t taste all that bad, certainly no worse than any other American mass-produced fermented slop.
I knew a wait-person in a little rock club who had a scam going. The bar had Bud and Bud Lite on tap; they also had Old Milwaukee, which cost a dollar less a pitcher. When someone would order a pitcher of Bud, the first pitcher she’d bring would actually contain Bud. The second pitcher they ordered would be Old Mil; she’d pocket the dollar difference. No one ever complained. It all tastes the same. The only difference is advertising budget.
Please note: I am not in favor of ripping off customers, even stupid pretentious customers. Unless you see them pull into the parking lot in a Hummer. Then you can rip them off AND spit in the beer. /disclaimer
I wonder how many snotchos the average Hummer pilot consumes in a given year?
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 6:05
Before I read the whole comment, I was going to say that they all taste the same after the first one or two. Then I read the whole comment. So my point is…um central to whatever my point is.
PS – my google fu is not strong this evening
Smut Clyde said,
January 26, 2009 at 6:10
a guy who once punctured his septum while picking his nose
Objection your honour! The insult presupposes the continued existence of nasal septum.
jim said,
January 26, 2009 at 6:34
Outrage Troll Fail on Aisle Five.
Adams was a winner of a non-partisan election, so his official affiliation is pretty much academic – he could just as easily have had to beat a fellow Dem to take office, if I understand the terms of the race correctly. Comparisons to John Edwards? Yeesh, he was running for POTUS – maybe which set of debates he appeared on would be a bit of a hint, huh? Vitter? Affiliation front-&-center from day one. Blago? Likewise.
Adams may like the young bucks, but so fucking what? Regardless of whether it squicks you out or not, 18 is not jailbait in his bailiwick, so the entire “Horrific Scandal Worse Than Teh Holocaust” thing is moot.
Oh, & the Gary Rupperts of America need to understand that if Commandante Bush had a lot of those terrorists tortured, they won’t be kept in custody in Leavenworth, Sing-Sing, Alcatraz, Supermax, or the Chuck E. Cheese ball-pit for that matter – they’ll be in excellent shape to be set free on appeal, courtesy of their oh-so-helpful BFF the ex-president. If Truth In Advertising applied to political parties, the GOP motto would be “Al-Quaeda First” … Bush was AWESOME at keeping Americans safe after 9/11: just ask the surviving staff at the US Consulate in Yemen … or Baghdad … or Karachi.
A broken Janus node said,
January 26, 2009 at 6:43
Stooge Poutine
6 turtle lips, tenderly sanctified
1 objectivist, teasingly planked
4 quarts thyroid, divided
1 septum, pierced diligently
Puree the thyroid religiously. Gently toss with objectivist. Combine semiotically with flambed septum. Adorn with turtle lips.
Immediately serves three.
pedestrian said,
January 26, 2009 at 6:49
Gently toss with objectivist
In my experience, objectivists prefer to be tossed aggressively.
Snowwy said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:10
In keeping with the Golden Rule, why should we give a fuck how Objectivists prefer to be tossed?
opie_jeanne said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:12
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 5:07
opie_jeanne: I’m using all my powers (google fu) to track it down. In the meantime, I’ll share this one I hadn’t encountered before: “Ayn Rand – the Anne Coulter of philosophy”
Bless you Peej. I thought I had it bookmarked in my blog, but no, so I too am trying to track it down. My google-fu doesn’t seem so strong tonight.
Righteous Bubba said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:25
Michael Crook, Hunger Artist.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:34
Candy, you needn’t describe the appeal of Steel Reserve. I only “eeew/eeeked” because of personal experience/knowledge therewith. Hope you can get better stuff soon.
opie_jeanne said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:39
Peej, got a link? I’m not even able to find the article you mentioned, so weak my google fu is.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:48
Too fecking precious. And here we were, all hoping he’d have the courage of his convictions. There’s something about a Happy Meal (or whatever) that;s irresistible to whingers. At least he’s doing is best to develop cardiac disease, we’ll always have that.
noen said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:48
Three days? That’s it? There have been plenty of people who went on hunger strikes for worse reasons who lasted longer than that.
Don’t Muslims fast during Ramadan? (Checks wikipedia) Oh! They fast all day long, from sunrise to sunset, for a month. While not the same as going completely without it does take quite a bit of dedication. Something apparently Michael Crook lacks. What a loser.
Snorghagen said,
January 26, 2009 at 7:53
Not necessarily, Gary.
Immediately after escaping, the escapee would be very close to Leavenworth, and would remain close if he escaped but did not move. If the escapee did move – and moved in a perfectly straight line – he would be close to Leavenworth shortly after escaping, but progressively less close with the passage of time. As his distance from Leavenworth increased, it could eventually be said that he was ‘far’ from Leavenworth. However, after he passed the mid-point of his circumnavigation of the Earth, he would begin to draw nearer and nearer to Leavenworth and would finally have to re-enter the prison and return to his cell.
Another Kiwi said,
January 26, 2009 at 8:08
Obviously Snorghagen has bought into the “Round Earth” scientific hoax. Ruprecht will not fall for that one!
noen said,
January 26, 2009 at 8:13
Round Earth indeed! Citation needed.
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 8:15
It is too round! What’s w/ you people? Don’t you understand that it’s hollow, & that’s where the aliens & black helicopters come from?
noen said,
January 26, 2009 at 8:32
and Nazi UFOs. Can’t forget them.
Snorghagen said,
January 26, 2009 at 8:32
Absolutely!
It stands to reason that if there are four corner days rotating simultaneously around a four quadrant-created Earth, then sub-harmonic oscillations would pull all Earth matter to equal distances from the central spiritual anti-God node. Thus the Earth is round and hollow, with an interior filled with floating ectoplasmic blobs and giant storehouses for zombie Republican voters.
Anne Laurie said,
January 26, 2009 at 9:12
Three days? That’s it? There have been plenty of people who went on hunger strikes for worse reasons who lasted longer than that.
Hell, I know plenty of people, mostly women, who’ve done liquid-only diets for a lot longer than that just to get ready for swimsuit season / the prom / wearing that one-size-smaller-than-usual wedding dress. And they didn’t expect to get any medals for it, either.
Tehanu said,
January 26, 2009 at 9:46
Don’t have time to read all the comments, so maybe I’m repeating someone else’s remarks, but … Gary Ruppert seems to know a whole lot about Federal prisons, doesn’t he? Would it be irresponsible to speculate? I feel it would be irresponsible not to ….
Loneoak said,
January 26, 2009 at 9:53
I hope we get to talk about the Pope-tastic ex-excommunication of the Nazi-apologist 9-11 Truther Bishop Williamson tomorrow. ‘Cuz that dude is crazier than Gary Ruppert and he’s Ratzi the Nazi’s BFF.
An even more pendantic asshole said,
January 26, 2009 at 9:54
Technically, it’s an oblate spheroid.
pedestrian said,
January 26, 2009 at 9:59
Oooh there is some FIERCE drama going on over at RedState.
Apparently, some “highly respected anti-stimulus economist” tried to use WWII as a model to prove that massive government spending is a feeble tool for increasing employment and consumer spending. Paul Krugman dutifully points out that the period under consideration already had full employment and severe restrictions on consumer spending because, during WWII THERE WAS A WAR. Go read it. It’s hysterical: http://krugman.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/22/war-and-non-remembrance/
WELL, Pejman, the resident economics expert at RedState, can’t believe that Krugman could be so rude, and declares his team to be the winners anyway, since Krugman didn’t even attempt to explain basic macroeconomics to them:
http://www.redstate.com/pejman_yousefzadeh/2009/01/26/quote-of-the-day-10/
DOCTOR: Nurse, get this man on an antibiotic drip immediately!
NURSE: But doctor, shouldn’t we bleed him? They bled George Washington!
DOCTOR: Yes, and it killed him, now quit trying to think and move!
NURSE: (sobbing) You’re mean to me, and you didn’t even try to give any historical examples! Just for that, we’re using leeches!
M. Bouffant said,
January 26, 2009 at 10:30
Loneoak, thanks.
Been watching that all wknd, but didn’t see what Randy Andy (or his flunkies) had put up today.
Quite the subject for discussion indeed.
Prospero said,
January 26, 2009 at 11:33
It’s a well-known fact that terrorists can’t cross running water.
Erik W. said,
January 26, 2009 at 12:01
Quite the subject for discussion indeed.
Sick and twisted political ideas are not grounds for excommunication. The SSPX’ers were excommunicated because they refused to submit to the authority of the Pope after Vatican II.
I haven’t clicked on an Andy Randy link in ages. The neocons really fetishize poor George Orwell, don’t they. The man was a socialist anarchist for heaven’s sake!
Smut Clyde said,
January 26, 2009 at 12:15
DeLong, Krugman and all the rest are content to launch calumnies
When I move into my underground laboratories concealed within a volcanic island, dibs on the name Calumny for my ground-to-air rocket defenses. I rather like the sound of “The forces of good have arrived! But too late, haha!! Minions, prepare to launch calumnies!”
Smut Clyde said,
January 26, 2009 at 12:15
It’s a well-known fact that terrorists can’t cross running water.
Nor can they enter a private dwelling without an invitation.
davek said,
January 26, 2009 at 14:18
Gilchrist FTW.
Can you please explain your name? I’m baffled. Is it something to do with Scrabble?
Lex (Agent of Chaos) Azagthoth said,
January 26, 2009 at 14:43
Awwww, don’t knock my Pope. Bar-B-Q Pope either. I love that song.
Dragon-King Wangchuck, Still Godless After All Heathen Years said,
January 26, 2009 at 14:52
Michael Crook, Hunger Artist.
So, he lasted five days – I don’t know who had that picked in the pool.
And after five days of starvation, what was it that broke his spirit? Fucking Golden Arches. Now we know the truth – the reason Ronald McDonald wears all that clown make-up is becaues he’s really one of them Negroes. Laughing it up at us in white-face, and taunting all the Hunger-Striking Defenders of the White Race. Perhaps Michael Crooks can start a crusade against Ronald, force him to change his name back to Kunta Kinte or whatever it was.
alec said,
January 26, 2009 at 15:12
BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA
BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA
JESUS CHRIST MY LORD AND SAVIOR WHY WON’T YOU LET ME STOP EATING DOG SHIT HOMPH HOMPH HOMPH
BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA
alec said,
January 26, 2009 at 15:14
He’d only enjoy it. You know how they are in the SS.
alec said,
January 26, 2009 at 15:27
Pains me though it does to say so, I have to say that Ratzy (being basically his ideological and theological BFF for quite some time) is JP2’s boy through and through. Hell, one can go farther and say that, assuming John Paul II could have reasonably be expected to outlive the decade (and start appointing large numbers of officials and making significant decisions), this kind of thing would be inevitable: the move from the Catholic discourse as attacking or defending a peculiarly Roman Catholic institutional malaise to the Catholic discourse as a sort of institutional echo of the wider European right’s perception of modernity. What we are seeing is the inevitable fruit of the appointment of Walesa, a member of a bishopric that basically saw the French and Russian Revolutions as the same thing at heart.
It is not necessary for someone whose political relevance is mostly limited to a very certain kind of Italian to think seriously about quietly pardoning Holocaust deniers. Unfortunately, what with the Holocaust denier crowd being a pretty big constituent of the hard right in Europe, all that the expedient measure of ignoring which kind of Semites a political ally and/or Church underling is in the business of hating has going against it is the whining of said Semites and other Communists.
This is going to be the norm, not the exception, and it’ll be a hundred times worse once Ratzinger is dead and replaced with someone with less painfully self-evident ties to Europe’s breathtakingly checkered past on race. Hell, get someone in whose country Islamophobia isn’t a serious issue – Spain, maybe, or one of the less pleasant American countries – and you can quote all the Crusaders you like.
donuts said,
January 26, 2009 at 15:33
Seen in today’s New York Times:
This is William Kristol’s last column.
Hellelujah.
alec said,
January 26, 2009 at 15:58
Wojtyla. There really is no excuse for that and I lack the requisite level of piss and vinegar to accuse Poland of being a massive West Slavic hive-mind.
Lex (Agent of Chaos) Azagthoth said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:10
Well, I guess I know old Butthole Surfers songs better than my own Pope, eh?
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:20
I have a conservative friend… actually, he’s pretty reasonable so I won’t call him a wingnut… who trots out this trope every so often, and mentioned this story in particular.
So I pointed out that there was an article in the New York Times last week about Joe Bruno’s troubles that never even mentioned his party affiliation, ever!
OMG! The hew and cry that rose from the email response was amazing!
Suddenly, reality bit him on the ass, and he was in complete denial.
Rusty Shackleford said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:44
All those years of buying King Cobra and I had no idea what the specific gravity was.
Our Dead Selves said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:47
Did Joe Bruno’s *ahem* troubles make it to the national news? I heard about it locally (being in his former district and all), and if it was only reported in upstate, there would be no need to publish his party affiliation.
I love Ol’ Joe’s “poor me” speech he gives every time he gets accused of wrongdoing. I’ve been hearing it for years now, but it never fails to make me giggle.
pedestrian said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:56
I rather like the sound of “The forces of good have arrived! But too late, haha!! Minions, prepare to launch calumnies!”
As I said previously, I’m more of a catamite luncher than a calumny launcher.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 16:59
As I said previously, I’m more of a catamite luncher than a calumny launcher
Catamites…do those grow up from the ground or down from the ceiling?
Bina said,
January 26, 2009 at 17:15
Up from the ground, if I recall correctly. (Google the terms “top” and “bottom”.)
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 17:18
(Google the terms “top” and “bottom”.)
Please. I practically grew up in Greenwich Village.
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
January 26, 2009 at 17:50
It’s a well-known fact that terrorists can’t cross running water.
And yet, somehow the oceans no longer protect us.
Can you please explain your name? I’m baffled. Is it something to do with Scrabble?
It was generated by one of Righteous Bubba’s JanusNode scripts. I just liked the look of it and was in the market for a new name.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 17:55
I’m glad to know I’m not alone; did one of those all day tooling around sessions, didn’t find anything, posted something about what I was googling for, and got roasted like the last peanut in Hell, because someone else found it in ten seconds.
Sigh. Maybe the toobs were clogged this weekend.
Righteous Bubba said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:00
My jackal just died touchingly after almost 17 years – he was the love of my cocksucking horrible life. I don’t know how he got stuck in that kettle. I’m sure you know a jackal needs creativity but I had no creativity left.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:18
It’s a well-known fact that terrorists can’t cross running water.
And yet, somehow the oceans no longer protect us.
Those waters are at a slow jog, tho.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:25
I’m all for digging up Nixon and using an ash stake. Theoretically.
Once you get rid of the king vampire, all his followers are supposed to turn to dust.
Would be cool.
Loneoak said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:27
It’s a well-known fact that terrorists can’t cross running water.
Then we should keep those shit moats runny.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:38
My jackal just died touchingly after almost 17 years
I gave my jackal to Goodwill after I bought a suit. The tie stayed, tho.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:55
Oh, and BTW, that dude broke his five day fast for MickyD’s?
Eleventyzillion!
I’d go for a fine pizza, at the very least.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 18:59
Someone with a slightly sharper edge than Scott would understand that identifying a non-partisan mayor by his party affiliation is somewhat like mentioning the party affiliation of a blogger each time a newspaper reports his or her latest shenanigans, as in “Scott Johnson (R) piddled on himself yesterday in the ladies lingerie section of the Lake Minnetonka WalMart.”
This brings up another point about this “Dems never get named, but Republicans are prominently identified” meme.
Nine times out of ten, when someone points out an article to me about a republican, they quote a piece from Huffington Post.
Errrrrrrrrrr, guys? HuffPo is an opinion blog, not a factual news source, so you can expect the rules of journalism to be tossed!
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:10
Oh, and BTW, that dude broke his five day fast for MickyD’s?
I’m laying odds that, despite his severe hunger, he was going to hold out much longer, but then ended up watching cartoons on Saturday morning…oddly, he has no kids…and saw all the McD’s commercials and finally broke down.
WereBear said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:14
A plausible scenario. Though if that is really how it happened, a five day fast followed by a probably large McD’s meal… that could lead to having yer colon draped over the shower rail.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:14
Nope, I live in the Kansas City suburban area in Missouri.
David???? Is that you???
Holy crap…I don’t believe I get yet ANOTHER chance to kick the living shit out of you online!
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:35
opie – I missed your request last night, sorry.
Um….. here is the Ayn Rand” “the Anne Coulter of philosophy” (near the bottom)
You might also look here for a bunch of links to various Rand criticism &c.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:43
Mang! I just ran across Study Sees an Obama Effect as Lifting Black Test-Takers at the NYT. (thanks, brendan!) I definitely want to see this study repeated (somehow).
He is the messiah! He is the messiah!
Bigby said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:47
So, um, if these terrists do escape from Levenworth, then what? They gonna go to the local Ace Hardware (in orange jumpsuits, not speaking a word of English, fuckin’ illegal aliens), get some boxcutters and duct tape and go kick ass all over the Jayhawk State (pursued by probably the largest manhunt ever seen in the USA in it’s history)? That’d be eleventy billion times cooler to watch on the Tee Vee than OJ in his white Bronco!
Righteous Bubba said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:57
So, um, if these terrists do escape from Levenworth, then what?
We give them cut-rate mortgages and a copy of Heather Has Two Mommies.
Righteous Bubba said,
January 26, 2009 at 19:59
Sauteed Guilty Tasmanian Devils with Whisked Evaporated Milks
Ingredients:
3 pints adult Tasmanian devils, paranoidly salted
6 portions evaporated milk
6 pounds ethereal berry
5 cups unprincipled tarpon fin, pickled
1 portion mint
7 bunches basil
Sacrifice a nearby grunt or a creature of similar size. Discard remains furtively. Separate Tasmanian devils foot from tail. Inflate tail. Use a food processor to stir the berry with the evaporated milk. Stuff the resulting goo into the Tasmanian devils. Find some soya milk and drink it. Salt – very exhalingly – the tarpon fin, mint, and the basil. Dab the latter combination on to the former. Bake for 101 hours. Serves 14.
opie_jeanne said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:34
Thanks, Peej. I did see all of those links.
The one I’m driving myself nuts trying to find describes an evening in her salon written by a man who was invited there when he was a grad student, or fresh out of grad school. He’s someone who’s a Big Deal now, and his essay was very amusing.
I’m almost certain that one of the regulars here posted the link to it, and I seem to remember it was in a thread that also had a link to Molly Ivins’ hysterical essay about Camillie Paglia, if that rings a bell. I did bookmark that one, had no problem finding it again.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:35
So, um, if these terrists do escape from Levenworth, then what?
Marry rednecks and father the 51st President of the United States.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:36
So, um, if these terrists do escape from Levenworth, then what?
We give them cut-rate mortgages and a copy of Heather Has Two Mommies.
And 72 Virgin Ben Shapiros.
noen said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:41
PeeJ — Thank you for the list of critics of Ayn Rand. They are very good. I especially like Robert Bass as I’ve come across him before. He is more accessible to me than some of the deeper criticisms.
Legalize said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:45
I think it would be pretty fun to drop these fellows off in a wealthy suburb somewhere in Teh Heartland followed by FOX television cameras. Give them 100 bucks, a miniature Arabic-English dictionary, 1 pair of nylons, 1 pack of chewing gum, sleeping pills, pep pills, morphine, some rubbers, and some lipstick. I’d watch that show.
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:48
Legalize,
We could call it “The Rumi Man”!
OK, that’s probably going to need some explaining…
opie_jeanne said,
January 26, 2009 at 20:58
Oh Peej!!! I found it! It’s here, a “morality play in one act” by Murray Rothbard called “Mozart was a Red”.
http://www.lewrockwell.com/rothbard/mozart.html
Snowwy said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:31
actor212,
Richard Dawson is retired. Just who were you thinking of to host this show?
actor212 said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:32
Richard Dawson is retired. Just who were you thinking of to host this show?
*whew*
Someone got it….
Um, well, Louie Anderson? He did such a bang up job on Family Feud.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:33
That shit is teh funnay!
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:35
I refer, of course, to the Ayn Rand satire. Who the fuck is Louie Anderson?
Rusty Shackleford said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:39
Perhaps we could get Conan O’Brien to host the show.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 21:59
we kin haz new fodder now?
thxbai
Rusty Shackleford said,
January 26, 2009 at 22:00
A funny libertarian. Who knew?
commie atheist said,
January 26, 2009 at 22:04
What I want to know is, has Obama whipped out his huge stimulus package and shoved it down the throats of the Republicans yet? Time’s a wastin’.
PeeJ said,
January 26, 2009 at 22:17
here is the link you woefully neglected to include
59 Les Paul Copy said,
January 27, 2009 at 1:35
“My jackal just died touchingly after almost 17 years – he was the love of my cocksucking horrible life. I don’t know how he got stuck in that kettle. I’m sure you know a jackal needs creativity but I had no creativity left.”
I know how you must feel– my peccary has mesothelioma. I’m really gonna miss his feverish grunting and burrowing.
Kj said,
January 27, 2009 at 4:45
Gary says, “What kind of “natural” lifestyle dooms people to always seek out vastly younger naive people? The vast majority of homosexuals go on to seek vastly younger partners. For example, Barney Frank has a taste for men 30 years younger than him.”
I dunno. Ask my husband. He wasn’t naive, but he was just 20 when I–a newly-divorced woman of 33–spotted him. That was ten years ago. We’re married and still together. Neither of us feels very, uh, “doomed.”
But then again, we’re straight, so you’ll easily overlook this, I guess.
Another Kiwi said,
January 27, 2009 at 8:28
TPM prove that Gary Ruprecht is John McCain
Or is just a spooky coincidence????