21
The End Of Confederate Yankee As We Know It
It wouldn’t be fair to leave it unremarked that Bob “Confederate Yankee” Owens — fact-checkerer, debunker and rebunker, and scourge of the liberal MSM — has written what appears to be a post calling for the investigation of official misconduct not allegedly committed by a political enemy, i.e. a ‘liberal,’ a set of ‘liberals,’ or ‘liberalism.’
That is, even amidst this recent crime wave of liberals liberalling and unrepentant terrorists being elected to the White House, not to mention the impending dawn of the Glorious Socialist Revolution and all the statues of Mumia that are slated to be cast out of melted gunmetal and multi-cartridge rifle magazines,* he seems in this case to be applying universal standards to things. Because no, check this out:
Friendly Fire Coverup Comes to Light
Read this article and watch the 12 minutes of edited video. There is some circumstantial evidence here that two U.S. soldiers in an apparent overwatch position were mistaken for insurgents in Ramadi in 2006, and were then killed by a single shot from the main gun of a U.S Abrams tank. Audio in the clip also seems to indicate that the coaxial 7.62 machine gun on the tank also opened up on the position following the discharge of the main gun.
Friendly fire occurs in every war, even though our soldiers try very hard to minimize the risk.
Here, though, it seems that a coverup began to form within 30 minutes of the incident, before the second soldier who died was even evacuated. As his sergeant blamed the incoming fire on a tank in a radio call, he was immediately told by a superior who was not on the scene that the deaths were the result of enemy mortar fire.
That someone then ordered the rushed shredding all documentation related to the men further reeks of a coverup. I suspect we have some Captains, Majors, and perhaps even a Colonel or higher who are involved.
The Army needs to get to the bottom of this, and fast.
A new leaf? If so, this new suspicion toward the military comes at a fortunate time. As it happens, today would have brought embarrassment like no other day (which is to say, at least more than none) to our tireless identifier of AP ‘fauxtography,’ our critic of alleged Associated Press photos of so-called ‘dead’ Middle Eastern alleged children, who can not be independently proven to have been killed exactly as shown, and are therefore, like Schroedinger’s cat, neither dead nor alive, forever.
Yes, we wandered those shores with him, but today we find that he must walk alone.
* Should the US government ever confiscate guns for the purpose of statuary production, we believe the statue should be a monumental rendering of Cold Dead Hands.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:00
Cover up? You mean like when Pat Tillman was shot? What did he say back then?
Hoosier X said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:02
What have you monsters done to Confederate Yankee?!?!?!?
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:13
the statue should be a monumental rendering of Cold Dead Hands.
Awesome idea. Here’s myfirst draft.
Tommmcatt said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:22
Clearly, Obama will do anything to keep his wife’s “Whitey” album from coming to light, even blowing up US American soldiers in a country miles away from the API.
Why CY has not yet come to this conclusion is beyond me. Perhaps George Soros got to him? Wheels within wheels, my friends….
Loneoak said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:22
I would like some Blackazoid statuary already.
Upgrayedd said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:24
What about a government scheme where you trade in your filthy AK-47s for wonderful shiny new BBQ grills?
Grand Moff Texan said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:24
That someone then ordered the rushed shredding all documentation related to the men further reeks of a coverup. I suspect we have some Captains, Majors, and perhaps even a Colonel or higher who are involved.
Which used to make them “patriots” in CY’s world.
.
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:24
He’s just warming up to be in full “anti-government” mode by the time Jan 20 rolls around.
All the wingnuts are slowing down their brains (if that can be imagined), preparing them for doing 180’s. Gov’t wiretapping will be bad. Habeus Corpus will be a basic right rivalling Saint Second Admendment. And so on.
Pere Ubu said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:27
Gosh, the military covers up a blue-on-blue incident in an unpopular war?
Huh. Imagine that.
Must be Obama’s fault.
J— said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:29
A new leaf?
Not if his commenters can help it.
islmfaoscist said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:32
I’d melt the guns down and make a giant statue of a stick of butter.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:34
Even now, Claes Oldenburg is sketching designs for a giant memorial statue in the form of a toppled BBQ grill. Provisional title is “Monumental Blunder”.
In the meantime, this charcoal grill is several kinds of awesome.
Loneoak said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:39
He’s just warming up to be in full “anti-government” mode by the time Jan 20 rolls around.
The genius of the wingnut “mind” is that since conservatives are anti-government, when conservatives run the government the government is simultaneously the government and not the government.
A =/= A = A
In this formulation, conservative government has nothing to do with governance, it has only to do with spiting “the government” which is by definition liberal.
Smut Clyde said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:41
I would melt the butter down and make a giant statue of a gun. Except the last time I did that, it annoyed the Frau Doktorin and she banned me from the kitchen for two weeks.
actor212 said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:43
the statue should be a monumental rendering of Cold Dead Hands.
I gladly volunteer my ex for modelling purposes.
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:47
> The genius of the wingnut “mind” is that since conservatives are anti-government, when conservatives run the government the government is simultaneously the government and not the government.
It seems the wingnuts/nutjobs/whackjobs are only happy when they are in Bizarro World.
Rick Massimo said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:53
A message which they scream every day from all corners of the mainstream media, which of course is run by liberals who never allow conservatives to get their message out.
P.S.:
Other countries’ soldiers, however, think that killing their own comrades is the best way to win a war. This is why we are the bestest and strongestest of all countries.
StringonaStick said,
November 21, 2008 at 23:57
Shoe, meet Other Foot. Other Foot, I’d like you to meet my good buddy Shoe.
Robert said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:05
Instaputz (the actual putz, not the site mocking the putz) has already starting marketing the ‘dissent is patriotic NOW’ meme.
Hasn’t been for eight years, but now? Now REAL patriots speak out against gummental oppression. Sheesh.
Duros Hussein 62 said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:11
all the statues of Mumia that are slated to be cast out of melted gunmetal and multi-cartridge rifle magazines,
Clearly, you meant Mom-Ra.
NobodySpecial said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:14
CY from the comments, extra comedy gold:
.
That;s my gut, folks, and I am on occasionally wrong on this sort of stuff, but my track record is that I’m more often than not right.
Do I REALLY need to elaborate?
Loneoak said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:17
Clearly, you meant Mom-Ra.
Do you mean Mumm-Ra?
Because that is really fucking weird. I just commented in the previous thread with a Thundercats joke.
actor212 said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:18
In this formulation, conservative government has nothing to do with governance, it has only to do with spiting “the government” which is by definition liberal.
OW!
My neck!
ice weasel said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:29
Why bob owens hate the military and this country? Doesn’t he know what claims like this do to morale?
Loneoak said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:30
My neck!
Go get an Islamo-gaybortion and use some of them stem cells to fix yer neck. Always makes me feel better.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:35
Why bob owens hate the military and this country?
It’s perfectly okay to hate America when the President’s a Democrat.
islmfaoscist said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:35
Actually, his gut is what tells him that his track record is more often then not right, too. It’s self-supporting, like a geodesic pretzel of wingnut logic.
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:44
Did someone say self-supporting geodesic pretzel?
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:50
That;s my gut, folks, and I am on occasionally wrong on this sort of stuff, but my track record is that I’m more often than not right.
Sadly*, No!
*or not
tigrismus said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:52
People who live in self-supporting geodesic pretzels shouldn’t throw scones.
Rob G said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:57
From my (admittedly superficial) study of American military history, I got the impression that friendly fire was a feature rather than a bug. All that running around screaming at everyone, whaddaya expect?
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 0:58
People who program in C++ shouldn’t throw pointers.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:00
All that running around screaming at everyone
Rather like what I’d envision a NRO cruise as being like.
Smiling Mortician said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:06
My theory is that Smut Clyde has his own private HOV lane for teh internets.
Righteous Bubba said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:07
People who give in as spouses shouldn’t grow bones.
OneMan said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:07
You guys! You guys! I have the best idea: a statue of two cold, dead hands…
…made out of butter!
And people who program in C shouldn’t throw exceptions.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:08
People who live in gas trousers shouldn’t row phones.
MzNicky said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:09
Smut Clyde is making my ribs hurt.
MzNicky said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:10
You’ve ALL got the sillies tonight, it seems.
MzNicky said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:10
People who seive in crass blouses shouldn’t blow crones.
RUGGED IN MONTANA said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:11
Should the US government ever confiscate guns for the purpose of statuary production, we believe the statue should be a monumental rendering of Cold Dead Hands.
The geys will get my heterosexuality from me when they pry my hands off of my cold, dead privates. That’s in the Bill of Rites.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:11
Cats who are past mousers shouldn’t stow clones.
MzNicky said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:12
sieve.
mikey said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:12
It is a wise man who, when digging a miserable little hole from which to try to survive the night, arranges to have the minimal number of heavy weapons inside the perimeter directly BEHIND him.
Things get a little warm and Ma Deuce and the mortar pits start throwing ordnance all over hell’s half acre, you’d really much prefer not to be on the outgoing flight path.
My advice? Cozy up next to the M60 anchoring one end of the line or the other. Things might be a little thin if you start to get overrun, but at least then you’re likely to get killed by the enemy instead of those idiot redheads from kentucky. Yeah, you know the ones…
mikey
RUGGED IN MONTANA said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:15
but at least then you’re likely to get killed by the enemy instead of those idiot redheads from kentucky. Yeah, you know the ones…
The ones who ain’t natural redheads?
tigrismus said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:17
And people who program in C shouldn’t throw exceptions.
Don’t be so definitive in your pronouncements: there’s always an exception.
Snowwy said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:21
No RUGGED, let me fix that for you.
The ones who ain’t natural
redheads?Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:28
Whose idea was it to start an Artificial Rocks Factory?
Who cast the first stone?
dumpendebat said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:28
>all the statues of Mumia that are slated to be cast
>out of melted gunmetal and multi-cartridge rifle magazines
That is about the funniest thing I’ve read all week.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:29
People who stone houses shouldn’t throw glass.
Or something.
mikey said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:37
People who live in glass houses better not be shy nor overly modest.
Whether they throw shit or not…
mikey
OneMan said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:39
Stoners with mouses shouldn’t kiss ass.
Loneoak said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:42
People shouldn’t live in glass houses. It’s a stupid idea.
MzNicky said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:48
People shouldn’t live in glass houses. It’s a stupid idea.
Yeah, well, tell it to Billy Joel.
Pere Ubu said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:55
Well so what the hell am I supposed to do with all these brass blouses I owned?
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:56
People who sieve in crass blouses shouldn’t blow crones.
UR DOIN IT RONG
The quality of mercy is not strained.
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:59
The Egyptians once tried making statues of Mummia, but it smelt funny and tended to melt in the sun, so they used it to embalm bodies instead.
Ripley said,
November 22, 2008 at 1:59
She’s a glaaaaas house!
She’s mighty mighty
Just lettin’ it all hang out
The neighbors are none too pleased but the kids seem to enjoy it.
justme said,
November 22, 2008 at 3:23
That’s actually tensegrity at work there, rather than geodesics.
Pardon the Fullerquibble.
Kilo said,
November 22, 2008 at 3:43
Speaking of which, is it too soon to dig him up ? He did say we could.
actor212 said,
November 22, 2008 at 4:27
Purple Hookahs Scousers. Shunt Blows Homes.
F'in Librul said,
November 22, 2008 at 5:22
If you guys want real comedy wingnut gold posing at reasoned commentary, check out the Baton Rouge Business Report. The publisher, one Rolfe McCollister, is George Bush lite; bron into money, never had to work, but instead uses his moneyed position to inform like-minded wingnuts of the business climate in his moribund city.
His latest execrable scribbling notes that Obama should clean up the mess he made by getting elected…and that joker’s got six months to do it! And besides that, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton had better shut up, because now a black man is president, so obviously racism doesn’t exist anymore.
http://businessreport.com/news/2008/nov/17/buck-stops-obama-now/
Comedy gold!
Sporkey said,
November 22, 2008 at 6:55
That someone then ordered the rushed shredding all documentation related to the men further reeks of a coverup. I suspect we have some Captains, Majors, and perhaps even a Colonel or higher who are involved.
The Army needs to get to the bottom of this, and fast.
Just like they did with everyone else, then? So, like, a million years from now?
Yeah, and Abu Gahrib was a few bad apples, Pat Tillman’s death was, well, whatever they call it, and we’re AWESOME.
Yeah, it doesn’t remind me of anything….
jhc said,
November 22, 2008 at 8:48
Why am I thinking about a giant gun mettal gray plowshear?
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 8:58
What jhc said.
Though I’m going to spell it ‘ploughshare’, because I win more points at Scrabble that way.
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 9:35
This was on show at the British Museum a couple of years ago.
kiki said,
November 22, 2008 at 16:22
People who live in glass houses better not be shy nor overly modest.
Whether they throw shit or not…
The idea of people in glass houses throwing shit presents an interesting, if not terribly pleasant, mental image.
Randy Owens said,
November 22, 2008 at 16:37
Are you sure it isn’t more of a Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead sort of thing?
jim said,
November 22, 2008 at 20:05
Yeah, the timing around CY’s magical shift of perspective sure has a pong of fish alrighty … & his fanboyz seem less than enthused.
If at first you don’t fail, get it wrong harder.
A turd in the hand is worth poo in the tush.
When in doubt, hesitate.
Smut Clyde said,
November 22, 2008 at 21:51
Come friendly fire, fall on Slough!
It isn’t fit for humans now,
There isn’t grass to share a plough.
Mo's Bike Shop said,
November 23, 2008 at 10:07
Leonard Bernstein!
Honus said,
November 23, 2008 at 16:40
This land has lots of trousers
This land has lots of Mausers
and kitty cats to eat them when the sun goes down
Mentis Fugit said,
November 23, 2008 at 23:35
People who live in glass houses shouldn’t.