Nov
11

I’ll have what Hindy’s smoking, please




Posted at 14:26 by Brad

I don’t even know what to say to this, so I’ll just respond to it with YouTube clips:

The Importance of Being Careful

[...]

Obama thinks he is a good talker, but he is often undisciplined when he speaks. He needs to understand that as President, his words will be scrutinized and will have impact whether he intends it or not. In this regard, President Bush is an excellent model; Obama should take a lesson from his example. Bush never gets sloppy when he is speaking publicly. He chooses his words with care and precision, which is why his style sometimes seems halting. In the eight years he has been President, it is remarkable how few gaffes or verbal blunders he has committed. If Obama doesn’t raise his standards, he will exceed Bush’s total before he is inaugurated.

That’s carefulness we can believe in, my friends!

In all seriousness, expect the Powerline boys to lead the charge over the next few years to re-imagine George W. Bush as this generation’s answer to Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill and Jesus combined. Unfortunately, since Bush became preznit at the dawn of the YouTube age, I doubt they’ll have much success.

(Via.)

123 Comments »

  1. His Grace said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:34

    If gross incompetence and complete dumbassery didn’t keep assrocket from deifying Bush during his term, nothing will stop powerline from continuing this process in the future (except political expediency as determined by the RNC).

    Personally, I look forward to postings such as “George W. Bush: Greatest President Ever or Greatest President Possible” which wax nostalgically about the Bush years will simultaneously blaming everything bad that happened on Bill Clinton, Obama and Jimmy Carter.

  2. PeeJ said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:35

    Assrocket thinks he is a good writer, but he is often undisciplined when he tries to do it. He needs to understand that as Arguably America’s Most Influential Conservative Pundit, his words will be scrutinized and will have impact whether he intends it or not. In this regard, President Bush is an excellent model; Assrocket has obviously taken lessons from his example. Bush can’t form a coherent sentence. He chooses his words randomly, which is why his style sometimes seems halting. In the years he has been Arguablky America’s Most Influential Conservative Pundit, it is remarkable how few logical constructs he has committed to paper.

  3. Rufus Leaking said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:36

    It must be very strange to be President Bush. A man of extraordinary vision and brilliance approaching to genius, he can’t get anyone to notice. He is like a great painter or musician who is ahead of his time, and who unveils one masterpiece after another to a reception that, when not bored, is hostile.

  4. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:44

    It’s in the interest of, uhh

    Sing along with me, peeps!

  5. Jennifer said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:46

    Bush never gets sloppy when he is speaking publicly. He chooses his words with care and precision, which is why his style sometimes seems halting. In the eight years he has been President, it is remarkable how few gaffes or verbal blunders he has committed. If Obama doesn’t raise his standards, he will exceed Bush’s total before he is inaugurated.

    Now that’s the type of shitbox tongue-jacking that will get you named as TIME’s blog of the year!

  6. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:46

    Next Assmissile will predict that Obama will be unable to survive his encounter with teh Pretzel, unlike courageous George.

  7. Gary Ruppert Number Two said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:47

    Now that is a major breakthrough in Butt Propulsion technology. That could get us to Mars in a week. What’s next, Butt Warp Drive?

  8. ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:48

    You might want to bring this to Jay Carney’s attention, Jennifer.

    (And by that, I mean rub his nose in it, of course.)

  9. Gary Ruppert said,

    November 11, 2008 at 14:48

    The fact is, he is correct. Obama is a gaffe machine, while Bush is very Presidential. Obama needs to learn or he may be impeached and get us attacked by terrorists.

  10. Mudge said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:04

    Impeachment due to excessive malaprops. Interesting concept.

  11. forked tongue said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:06

    Were you ever eating something and all of a sudden you feel a big SNAP in your jaw and you realize that oh shit, there was an olive pit or something in your food and a little part of a tooth just broke off?

    That’s how I felt in my brain when I read that.

  12. attaturk said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:11

    So, Stalker or Moron?

    Reminds me of this old Saturday Night Skit about the “Mr. Belvedere Fan Club”

    Mr. Chairman: Oh, alright. Well, take a seat, make yourself comfortable, sit anywhere. We’re just getting ready to move on to our next ordr of business, but anything else?

    Doug: Yeah, I’d like to say, partly to talk about it, and partly to let the new guy in on the mood here a little bit. Uh.. Mr. Belvedere is.. the light of my life. Um.. I know I speak for the others.. uh, when I say he is.. so amazing.. you know? And, uh.. he’s just.. I wish.. you know.. I wish I could know him more, you know? Because.. he.. he is one of a kind, you know? He’s.. I think about him all the time, and.. well, I’m wondering – should we kill him?

    Mr. Chairman: [ stunned ] For God’s sake, no!

    Kevin: Uh.. we usually vote, Mr. Chairman.

    Mr. Chairman: Well, okay, but before we vote, I’d like Doug to explain why he wants to kill Brocktoon!

    Doug: Uh.. I want to meet this girl, and, uh.. I know that she’d be, you know, pretty impressed if she knew I hung out with Mr. Belvedere.

    Mr. Chairman: Well, why kill him, then?!

    Doug: Um.. because.. so he wouldn’t know how unworthy I am to hang out with him..?

  13. LittlePig said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:11

    The weird part is that it has to be love. W is soon to be as relevant as a fart in a hurricane, so why bother to climb the analingual heights?

    Laywers in love.

  14. LittlePig said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:12

    I hate when that happens.

  15. Till Eulenspiegel said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:14

    Bush never gets sloppy when he is speaking publicly. He chooses his words with care and precision, which is why his style sometimes seems halting.

    I could’ve sworn that those words exactly have often been used to describe Obama. Personally, I couldn’t stand listening to him in the early primary debates, and he still has that clipped speaking style that’s occasionally irritating.

    Maybe Hindy’s just confused, and he thinks Obama has been President these last eight years, and Bush is the President-elect. In that case you probably don’t want what he’s been smoking.

  16. owlbear1 said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:15

    Gary Ruppert said,
    November 11, 2008 at 14:48

    The fact is, he is correct. Obama is a gaffe machine, while Bush is very Presidential. Obama needs to learn or he may be impeached and get us attacked by terrorists.

    Main Entry:
    stale
    Pronunciation:
    \?st?l\
    Function:
    adjective
    Inflected Form(s):
    stal·er; stal·est
    Etymology:
    Middle English, settled, clear (of ale), not fresh, from Anglo-French estale, probably from Middle Dutch stel old (of beer)
    Date:
    15th century

    1 : tasteless or unpalatable from age [stale bread]

    2 : tedious from familiarity [a stale routine]

  17. milo said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:24

    What’s the frequency, Kenneth?

  18. javafascist said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:24

    Ah arserocket, how does it feel knowing that your surrogate daddy will never tan your backside the way you so richly deserve? So lonely. So very very lonely…

  19. Jennifer said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:26

    I think the clip where Bush talked about gynecologists not being free to share their love with women was unfairly excluded.

  20. dave said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:29

    In other news, NPR reported this morning that when Bush and Obama met, Bush said he would support the auto manufacturers aid package if Congress would give him his free trade deal with Colombia. Jeezus…I really hope Obama’s balls are at least that big.

  21. Medullah Ibrahim said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:30

    Merry Christmas, Mr. Hinderaker

  22. J— said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:36

    Hinderaker:

    The only news Barack Obama made in his first post-election press conference was when, in a classless moment, he falsely ridiculed Nancy Reagan for holding “seances” in the White House.

    How does one ridicule falsely? Actually, the falsity is in Hinderaker’s claim that Obama said Nancy Reagan held these sessions at the White House. He did not.

    The Voice of America reports Obama’s rep says he did not say what Kaczynski says he said, but Hinderaker, who is an honorable man, finds this highly unlikely.

  23. J. said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:41

    I love how quickly the comments over there go south. Jeebus, it’s three straight pages of mock. Awesome.

  24. MzNicky said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:48

    I think the clip where Bush talked about gynecologists not being free to share their love with women was unfairly excluded.

    To be fair, there are so so many to choose from. There are entire books full of Bushisms.®

  25. MzNicky said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:48

    The “can’t get fooled again” is still my fave.

  26. chris said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:53

    You forgot my favorite, May 24th 2004, addressing the Army College as the Abu Ghraib scandal was breaking, and Bush totally fucking mangled “Abu-Ghraib” (something anyone who had listened to a radio or tv for three minutes the preceeding week could pronounce) three fucking times–after practicing, even. It sounded like, “Aboo….guh…rape”. He got an ovation at the end which I think was just for getting through the goddamned speech.

  27. RobW said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:54

    It’s like praising Taft’s athleticism or Wilson’s folksiness or Johnson’s subtlety.

  28. Peeance Freeance said,

    November 11, 2008 at 15:57

    You forgot Poland! (Wanna buy some wood?)

  29. kiki said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:15

    Earn $$$s as a conservative blogger! All you need is an unconsciously homoerotic nickname, a shame-ectomy and a blunt blow to the head as a child.

  30. JoeBuddha said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:27

    I know we give ‘em a lot of crap about being reality challenged, and, though it’s true, we have been known to exaggerate the smallest bit for the sake of snark. However, I have to ask the obvious: what planet is this guy from and when exactly did he get here? This is absolutely the finest example of honest-to-goodness black-is-white up-is-down newspeak I’ve ever been confronted with.

  31. dan b said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:29

    Bush totally fucking mangled “Abu-Ghraib” . . . It sounded like, “Aboo….guh…rape”.

    Dag! I love me some Abu Grape! All with some peanut butter on a couple of slices of Wonder Bread . . . ridiculous good sandwich.

  32. Mark B said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:31

    I don’t believe Bush should be given anything, except maybe a swift kick in the ass on his way out the door.

  33. monkey knife fight said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:33

    I love how quickly the comments over there go south. Jeebus, it’s three straight pages of mock. Awesome.

    Uuhhhhh…this is your first visit to teh sadly no, isn’t it? If anything, our comments can only go north.

  34. monkey knife fight said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:36

    Oh crap!! You said “there,” not “here.” This is me: Duuuuuhhhhhhh

  35. Major Kong said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:41

    I’ll almost miss listening to George W. Bush wrestling with the English language – and losing.

  36. Legalize said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:44

    Now watch this drive.

  37. jim said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:58

    Yeah, judging from the comments there, Hindy managed to blow one of the walls out of the echo-chamber with this … er … thing.

    Still my all-time favorite Bush Koan:

    “I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.”

  38. D. Aristophanes said,

    November 11, 2008 at 16:59

    Shorter Buttscud: The F1-winning McLaren-Mercedes race car should really try to emulate this rusted-out Edsel sitting on concrete blocks in the overgrown yard of a condemned shack.

  39. J. A. Baker said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:08

    Assrocket thinks he is a good writer, but he is often undisciplined when he tries to do it. He needs to understand that as Arguably America’s Most Influential Conservative Pundit, his words will be scrutinized and will have impact whether he intends it or not.

    Just call him “Spathi“.

  40. Strider said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:10

    I NEVER tire of seeing that “Hinderaker-eats-a-corn-dog” picture! NEVAH!

  41. kc said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:15

    John “Buttrocket” Hinderaker is the greatest comedian in the history of America, perhaps the world. A man of surpassing wit, approaching genius. He never fails to make his audience laugh harder than anyone has ever laughed since the beginning of time.

  42. a concerned citizen said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:21

    shorter every hinderaker post ever:

    Hey, man, you don’t talk to the Preznit. You listen to him. The man’s enlarged my mind. He’s a poet-warrior in the classic sense. I mean sometimes he’ll… uh… well, you’ll say “hello” to him, right? And he’ll just walk right by you. He won’t even notice you. And suddenly he’ll grab you, and he’ll throw you in a corner, and he’ll say, “do you know that ‘if’ is the middle word in life? If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you”… I mean I’m no, I can’t… I’m a little man, I’m a little man, he’s… he’s a great man. I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across floors of silent seas…

  43. Robert Denby said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:25

    How can one be unaware that Bush has supplied enough material to fill eight years worth of “Bushism of the Day” calendars?

  44. nationalplumbingcodehandbook said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:26

    If Arguably America’s Most Influential Conservative Pundit wants to go down this path, there’s only viable response: Bring It On!

    The sad thing about “George W. Bush as this generation’s answer to Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill and Jesus combined” is that, pragmatically speaking, we have to assume that they really mean that. It’s like the kids in HS who said “Richard Bach is America’s greatest living writer.” You can argue with that because anyone who believes it, hasn’t read anything else.

    Corn Dogs! America’s Greatest Food!

  45. HelenWheels said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:31

    I think peance freance is my all-time fav, but “we’re here to put food on your family” is pretty great. I still like to use shrub-isms like “strategery” and “terrist” …. then there’s 8 years’ worth of “nucular” to top ‘em off.

    I agree with the above poster, I think AssRocket’s description is nearly a complete copy of a similar thing I heard someone say about Obama’s way of speechifying.

  46. MTS said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:33

    When I first saw this quote I thought it had to be satire; no one could possibly believe that Bush is a better public speaker than Obama. Even those who despise Obama the most admit that he is a powerful and eloquent public speaker. I’ve yet to hear Obama say anything cringe-making, while Bush does it practically every time his mouth, even on the rare occasions when he says something true.

  47. STI said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:37

    More FAIL . . .

    “Bloggingheads: Obama vs. Congress
    Ann Althouse of the University of Wisconsin and Glenn Reynolds of the University of Tennessee debate whether Obama will stand up to his party’s liberal base.”

    God help us all.

    (I can’t bear to watch. If you can, my initials have the link.)

  48. bayville said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:43

    Mr. Hinderaker,
    I REPEAT. DO NOT TAKE THE BROWN ACID!

  49. Djur said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:43

    J.A. Baker: That is an insult to a noble race of intelligent cowards.

  50. Candy said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:45

    I’ll bet this corndog huffing jackass watches Letterman every night to see Great Moments in Presidential Speeches because to him they really, truly are great moments in preznidenshul speeches.

    Sheesh, what an assrocket.

  51. MaryRC said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:46

    Now that Ronnie’s a saint and Nancy’s on her way to being beatified, we seem to have forgotten all the little scandals of the Reagan White House years — at least we did until Obama made his little quip about seances.

    That’s right, kids, President Reagan’s public appearances were planned with the help of Nancy’s astrologer. Didn’t know that, did you?

    Then there was the china, the spiky relationships with the children, the millions of dollars worth of designer clothes and jewels “loaned” to Nancy, her wealthy cronies with their embarrassing domestic mishaps, making herself a laughingstock in England by trying to outshine the royals, the Blackglama ad – one entertaining scandal after another.

    Thanks, Barack, for the memories.

  52. Quaker in a Basement said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:47

    OK, that’s it! We finally have conclusive proof that Hindraker is the greatest prankster of all time. This post can only mean that he’s about to reveal that he’s really Andy Kaufmann.

  53. noen said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:54

    I think Hindrocket knows how stupid this looks. He just believes that this is what is required of him and that someday someone will tap him on the shoulder and he’ll be invited to join the big guys. Eventually it will down on him that he’s stuck out here on the prairie forever. That’s when the true horror will set in.

  54. noen said,

    November 11, 2008 at 20:54

    Dawn… damnit, dawn.

  55. Smiling Mortician said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:00

    There I was, all set for my first h/t ever, and it just didn’t happen.

    Snif.

  56. pdq said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:05

    It must be very strange to be John Hinderaker. A man of extraordinary obsequiousness and toe-sucking approaching to weiner-worship, he is like a great bootlicker or chair-sniffer who is ignored by his BFF Dubya, and who unveils one masterpiece of idiocy and unrecognized self-caricature after another to his cretinous followers which, when not wanking, are wondering where Mom left the Cheetos.

  57. Some Guy said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:08

    Shorter buttrocket, with altered nouns for comedic effect:
    “It is staggering how many prostitutes Jack the Ripper didn’t murder.”

    What can men hope to do against such reckless ignorance?

  58. Marco said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:10

    No words.

    (but those two)

  59. Smut Clyde said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:11

    “I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.”
    I tried that, but the fish mugged me and stole my bicycle.

  60. Snarki, child of Loki said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:21

    Well, I think everyone has forgotten how Bush promised to bring honor and “dignitude” back to the White House.

    Honestly, I think he was being modest. The White House never had any “dignitude” before Bush brought some.

    And man, did he ever! Why Bush had dignitude out the wazoo, if you know what I mean.

    As for ButtScud, I think he has a teeny tiny little….point. In political terms, a “gaffe” is “accidentally telling the truth”.

    And Bush never did that. Telling the truth that is, accidentally or otherwise.

    Perhaps now ButtScud can come out of hiding, and stand forth boldly as an amazing straight-faced comic. He could be the new Yakoff Smirnoff of the intertubes: “on Soviet Blogs, thread hijack you!“.

  61. David said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:42

    Holy cow, those guys might as well be living in a parallel universe, they are so out of touch with America.

  62. actor212 said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:44

    I tried that, but the fish mugged me and stole my bicycle.

    So that’s why my wife filed for divorce! She didn’t need me anymore!

  63. David said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:49

    Btw, I’m glad the youtube “Bring it on” statement was first on the list…. the was also most egregious “Bushism” that I thought of also.

    Big talk from a small guy that never saw a day of combat.

    I won’t miss that arrogant smirk… I’m surprised no one ever called Bush on that stupid, arrogant smirk.

  64. luneylegume said,

    November 11, 2008 at 21:50

    Thye key is in the alternate
    safety and wisdom may be found in abundance
    held in escrow or obeyance
    Cheeto’s M W F
    Cheerio’s T TH S SN(sadly , no day)

  65. Quaker in a Basement said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:14

    Actor212 wins the Obliquey!

  66. RUGGED IN MONTANA said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:20

    Eating food that has been cooked in lead pots can be injurious over time…

  67. nationalplumbingcodehandbook said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:35

    I also hear a lot of “Compared to Clinton, the Bush WH has been clean as a whistle.” and/or, for example, this kind of stuff:

    …. The Bush administration was barely partisan at all, compared to the Clinton administration. Obama is demonstrating that he intends a return to the harsh partisanship of the Clinton years. Again, this is no surprise; I never believed they were serious when they were complaining about Bush, nor did anybody with the slightest awareness of political reality. It was all a hoax. We’re about to see what real partisanship looks like…

    http://www.plumbbobblog.com/?p=1942

    I think, once you accept that they mean what they say, you have assume that wingers who say this kind of stuff are beyond argument, they need professional help. I guess it’s useful for weeding out the human from the zombies, if nothing else.

  68. Not Sarah Palin said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:43

    In this regard, President Bush is an excellent model
    In what respect, Charley?

  69. nationalplumbingcodehandbook said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:46

    This is OT but, hey, is there a reason why the chick–I forget her name–in Conservatism’s Best Cartoon Evha, Day by Day, hasn’t been wearing pants all week? Is that, like, her thing? As a liberal, she just doesn’t wear pants? It’s weird. I thought, seeing one panel, a few days ago that the chick was, I dunno, going to make out or go to bed or something but, sadly no, she’s just wanders through the day in her panties. Am I missing something? Should I drop a note to the cartoonist to let him know that his chick character is missing her pants. Maybe it’s a just a misunderstanding, like Scarbough and the F-word?

    See, for example: http://www.daybydaycartoon.com/2008/11/11/#004897

  70. George W. Bush said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:48

    You’re all a big bunch of wankers. Just after my second inauguration I said,

    Because the — all which is on the table begins to address the big cost drivers. For example, how benefits are calculate, for example, is on the table; whether or not benefits rise based upon wage increases or price increases. There’s a series of parts of the formula that are being considered. And when you couple that, those different cost drivers, affecting those — changing those with personal accounts, the idea is to get what has been promised more likely to be — or closer delivered to what has been promised.

    Does that make any sense to you? It’s kind of muddled. Look, there’s a series of things that cause the — like, for example, benefits are calculated based upon the increase of wages, as opposed to the increase of prices. Some have suggested that we calculate — the benefits will rise based upon inflation, as opposed to wage increases. There is a reform that would help solve the red if that were put into effect. In other words, how fast benefits grow, how fast the promised benefits grow, if those — if that growth is affected, it will help on the red.

    and you didn’t even mention it in this entire thread. Hinderaker’s right — nobody appreciates me.

  71. The Goddamn Batman Was Never Wink Martindale, He Doesn't Care What They Say said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:48

    In a few short months, W will be retconned into a cute Jack Russell terrier who would occasionally piddle on the Oval Office carpet, but he would give everyone such a cute, doleful look with his big puppy eyes that everyone would go “Awww!” and forgive him. All mischief was ultimately the fault of Cheney the Persian Cat.

  72. Monkay said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:52

    It’s like the kids in HS who said “Richard Bach is America’s greatest living writer.”
    True, but wouldn’t Ayn Rand be a better example?

  73. J. A. Baker said,

    November 11, 2008 at 22:59

    J.A. Baker: That is an insult to a noble race of intelligent cowards.

    Heh. I’m glad that someone recognized my geeky game nerd reference! :)

    Shorter Butt-Missile: “Surprise and Terror! I am greeted by the smooth and hostile faces of our old enemy, the Hootmans…no…the Huge-glands, no, I remember, the Hunams!”

  74. commie atheist said,

    November 11, 2008 at 23:04

    This is OT but, hey, is there a reason why the chick–I forget her name–in Conservatism’s Best Cartoon Evha, Day by Day, hasn’t been wearing pants all week?

    Isn’t she the one that was pregnant recently? Sure doesn”t look it. And I don’t remember her boobs being so ginormous.

    I’m so out of touch. Sigh…

  75. actor212 said,

    November 11, 2008 at 23:52

    To quote George Bush, when asked to comment about Bhutan’s recent conversion to representative democracy:

    hamatahamatahamatahamata

    I think that’s central to Hindrocket’s thesis.

  76. Duros Hussein 62 said,

    November 11, 2008 at 23:54

    Bush never gets sloppy when he is speaking publicly. He chooses his words with care and precision, which is why his style sometimes seems halting. In the eight years he has been President, it is remarkable how few gaffes or verbal blunders he has committed. If Obama doesn’t raise his standards, he will exceed Bush’s total before he is inaugurated.

    Wait, who are we talking about?

    George Bush?

    George W. Bush?
    George Walker Bush?

    Not Jeb, right? George? Seriously? That’s who we’re talking about?

    Is there a Paypal button to donate to Con’s self-awareness?

  77. actor212 said,

    November 11, 2008 at 23:54

    This is OT but, hey, is there a reason why the chick–I forget her name–in Conservatism’s Best Cartoon Evha, Day by Day, hasn’t been wearing pants all week?

    Wardrobe malfunction. They’re testing Obama’s new and improved Hays Code.

    (boy, I think I just dated myself)

  78. jurassicpork said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:05

    Obama Tours White House, McCain Senate.

  79. chocolatepie said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:14

    gwb is like the demon gene splice baby of Yogi Berra and Bob Dole.

    Or George H.W. Bush and Barbara Bush. *shudder* I don’t even want to think about it.

  80. Smut Clyde said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:17

    I just dated myself
    It makes for a cheap night out.
    If I didn’t say it, RB would.

  81. J— said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:20

    Not Jeb, right?

    Oh, just you wait for Jeb!’s run for president. Hinderaker’s obsequiousness will be doubled because his muse’s rhetorical ability will come in not one but two languages. Hinderaker will suddenly, by the grace of blogger self-referentiality, become an expert critic of public discourse in both English and Spanish.

  82. bughunter said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:30

    Next from The Assmissile:

    B. Hussein needs to be more careful lest he come across as an elitist. In the eight years he has been President, it is remarkable how seldom George W Bush sounded condescending or came across as if he were scolding an eight-year-old for being stupid, and he certainly never sounded like a pedantic poser tone-perfectly regurgitating the talking points drilled into him repeatedly by a frustrated and clearly superior Vice President Regent who must repeatedly debase himself by having to coach a fucking idiot for a puppet figurehead and goddamit where’s my Blue Label and soda… Ahem-hem… If B. Hussein’s doesn’t curb his use of perfectly-pronounced words and warm, congenial tone, he will exceed Bush’s disapproval rating before he is inaugurated.

  83. ckc (not kc) said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:42

    Actor212 wins the Obliquey!

    …but not the obloquy, right?

  84. nationalplumbingcode said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:52

    Hmmm, okay, so I’m not crazy. Thanks for the help. So, the pantie, or is it a thong?, wearing chick in Conservatism’s Best Cartoon Evha is kinda weird. She used to wear something below her waist, right? Is she just airing out for Obama or something? Maybe she wet her pants last week and just hasn’t gotten around to putting them back on? That comic is really hard on the brain. It’s like trying to read a Bush press conference. Hmmm, god oh fucking mighty, I hope Assrocket keeps his pants on.

  85. FlipYrWhig said,

    November 12, 2008 at 0:58

    I tried that, but the fish mugged me and stole my bicycle.

    So that’s why my wife filed for divorce! She didn’t need me anymore!

    Hmm. If the fish badly needed a bicycle, shouldn’t your wife badly need you? I think you may be able to fight that divorce in Surreal Court.

  86. Rightwingsnarkle said,

    November 12, 2008 at 1:01

    Assrocket and friends are irrelevant.

    Still worth ridiculing, but ultimately irrelevant.

  87. OneMan said,

    November 12, 2008 at 1:08

    “(boy, I think I just dated myself)”

    hey, if nobody else will…..

  88. Tribal Sovereignty said,

    November 12, 2008 at 1:29

    means just that.

  89. Malixe said,

    November 12, 2008 at 1:40

    Shorter: “Him Obama, he no talk so good.”

  90. Lesley said,

    November 12, 2008 at 1:50

    Would it be possible to force Hinderaker over here and rub his nose in those videos?

  91. Tehanu said,

    November 12, 2008 at 2:42

    what planet is this guy from and when exactly did he get here?

    Planet of the Apes? no, insults monkey intelligence.

    Ferenginar? no, Ferengis only suck up for money — not stupid enough to do it for free on teh Intertoobz

    Tatooine? A howling desert populated mostly by primitives and galactic gangsters? A wretched hive of scum and villainy? I think we have it!

  92. sagra said,

    November 12, 2008 at 2:53

    Day by Day makes me sad. The place where the funny should be is just so… empty.

  93. RUGGED IN MONTANA said,

    November 12, 2008 at 3:16

    George Walker Bush?

    Wrong one. Our Mr. President is George Willard Bush.

  94. Smut Clyde said,

    November 12, 2008 at 3:30

    Willard? Wasn’t that the horror movie where the guy kept pet badgers?

  95. Another kiwi said,

    November 12, 2008 at 5:12

    Hindy’s pushing , oh yeah baby, for the Minister of Propaganda position in the Cheney “very legal and my colleagues made me do it” armed coup.

  96. actor212 said,

    November 12, 2008 at 5:22

    I think you may be able to fight that divorce in Surreal Court.

    Rauschenberg is my co-respondent.

  97. nationalplumbingcodehandbook said,

    November 12, 2008 at 5:39

    …Day by Day makes me sad…

    I’m always surprised to see that it still exists. Other than PJ media blogs, I never see or hear of it. Which is just as well. I keep thinking, well, someone finds this funny or whatever and that’s fine. I usually don’t get pissed off at it. However, whenever I actually read it, I think “What the fuck? Did someone put a ‘lude in my acid” Every strip was some thing along the lines of the panty character and the more I try to make sense of it, the worse I feel about life, the universe, everything, and the strip itself. I’ve been trying think of another piece of art that generates similar feelings, perhaps some of the post-Herbert Dune books? Maybe the novelizations of that TV show where a plane carrying kids crash lands and they have to fend for themselves? The art of that strip makes, oh, Journey to the Center of the Earth in 3-D look like a masterpiece. Oh, fuck it, I mean, really, why do I care if one of his characters is running around in a thong? Enough brain cells wasted. I’m going to go read some D-list wingers to rinse out my brain pan.

  98. Doctorb said,

    November 12, 2008 at 5:48

    http://www.watsonswildlife.com/images3/praying_for_peace_RDF.jpg

    “We’re not angry, just very disappointed and sad”

  99. ahem said,

    November 12, 2008 at 8:31

    Assrocket is just Gary Ruppert with a law degree and a corndog.

  100. Quaker in a Basement said,

    November 12, 2008 at 9:00

    …but not the obloquy, right?

    Wow! Excellent!!

  101. islmfaoscist said,

    November 12, 2008 at 9:46

    “And I think the world would be better off if we did leave. Uh-buh-dee ub-buh-deh If we didn’t if we if we left the world would be worse.”

  102. nationalplumbingcode said,

    November 12, 2008 at 10:28

    See also: http://www.kevinwolf.com/images/BushGW.jpg

  103. TheInternets said,

    November 12, 2008 at 11:04

    Sons of Liberty? Someone’s been playing too much Metal Gear.

  104. watchdog said,

    November 12, 2008 at 11:23

    KABLAM!!!!

    The republiCons strike another blow in their never-ending “War On Reality”TM.

    where will they hit next? Will they release more books with made-up facts like the P.I.G books, or perhapse another tome by Little Orphan Annie Coulter proving that Mussolini was not that bad a guy and was instead betrayed by that evil leftist Hitler.

    This is a center-right country after all, all those wonderful good things that APPERED to happen under ole Slick Willie Clinton were actually due to the brilliant leadership of King George the first (this does kind of suggest that the recession during the Bush 1 years was the fault of Saint Ronnie of Regan but I’m sure they can find another culprate), and make no mistake, when things get better under ObamaNation they will be due to the asstounding skills of our fearless leader King George the second.

    The war continues on, more fronts will be open (and never finished).

  105. Teaflax said,

    November 12, 2008 at 11:41

    Camille Paglia does for Palin what Assrocket just did for Bush:

    There is a powerful clarity of consciousness in her eyes. She uses language with the jumps, breaks and rippling momentum of a be-bop saxophonist.

  106. Doctorb said,

    November 12, 2008 at 12:12

    She uses language with the jumps, breaks and rippling momentum of a be-bop saxophonist.

    In what respect, Camille?

    I do agree that Palin’s eyes convey consciousness. Her irises contract when you shine a light in her eyes, and she focuses on objects, even tracking movement. In my opinion as a doctorb, plastic surgeon, and bone thingy guy, she is definitely alive.

  107. conumbdrum said,

    November 12, 2008 at 12:25

    It’s simple, folks. The Assrocket sees his winning last year’s Golden Wingnut Award (for his Bush = “man of extraordinary vision and brilliance approaching to genius” mindbender) as a rare honor, rather than the colossal extended middle finger it happens to be… and wants to lock up this year’s trophy months in advance. No other explanation makes sense.

  108. Mike N. said,

    November 12, 2008 at 16:33

    And beautifully, almost poetically, CNN prints an article with the headline:

    Bush: “I regret saying some things I shouldn’t have said.”

  109. Ken Lowery said,

    November 12, 2008 at 16:36

    Teaflax:

    Warn a brother, would you? That Paglia thing is the dumbest thing I’ve read in a long time.

  110. tigrismus said,

    November 12, 2008 at 17:31

    There is a powerful clarity of consciousness in her eyes

    Usually seen on deer by the light of one’s car’s headlights.

    She uses language with the jumps, breaks and rippling momentum of a be-bop saxophonist.

    Be-bop saxophonists can do that because they know what they’re doing: they know their instrument extremely well, have a deep understanding of music, and know what they want to do and say. Palin’s use of language is more like the jumps, breaks, and rippling momentum of a stampeding herd of some sort of wild animal, muddled confusion with little in the way of intelligence or intent guiding it. Maybe lemmings.

  111. actor212 said,

    November 12, 2008 at 17:40

    Obliquy, obloquy…

    Life goes on.

    Bah.

  112. J— said,

    November 12, 2008 at 19:16

    And beautifully, almost poetically, CNN prints an article with the headline:

    Bush: “I regret saying some things I shouldn’t have said.”

    Which includes this quote from Bush:

    My wife reminded me that, hey, as president of the United States, be careful what you say.

    Careful. Funny word. I think I just read it somewhere.

  113. Smut Clyde said,

    November 12, 2008 at 21:28

    Obloquy and obliquity have become ubiquitous.

  114. Duros Hussein 62 said,

    November 12, 2008 at 22:32

    I keep thinking, well, someone finds this funny or whatever and that’s fine.

    Cons don’t read it for the funny. They read it for the panties.

  115. actor212 said,

    November 12, 2008 at 22:34

    Obloquy and obliquity have become ubiquitous.

    Suddenly you’ve become a Ubiquitist?

  116. Smut Clyde said,

    November 12, 2008 at 23:06

    Ubik. Safe when used according to directions. Do not exceed the recommended dose.

  117. putnam said,

    November 13, 2008 at 0:24

    Why would a woman suggest that her political party be called the “Sons of Liberty”? Is that the funny?

    Or is it that SOL is short for Sons of Liberty, which is funny because, uh…?

  118. Jim Lippard said,

    November 13, 2008 at 0:47

    Don’t forget Andy Dick’s contribution:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_RSQSYgGB4

  119. simon said,

    November 13, 2008 at 5:03

    If you took all the drugs I did when I was in college, they would never match Assrocket’s sweet hallucination.

  120. maxcat06 said,

    November 13, 2008 at 12:37

    Don’t forget that the French have no word for “entrepreneur”…..

  121. Hugh said,

    November 13, 2008 at 22:53

    Assrocket!!!

  122. Kip W said,

    November 18, 2008 at 20:22

    This is the same single standard (gop GOOD) we saw years ago, when Jimmy Carter was mocked if he happened to misstate the second valence band of an isotope, but Ronald Reagan was hailed as an elder statesman if he wore pants onstage and didn’t short out his microphone with drool.

    Nice to know that some traditions will never die.

  123. JABbering Stooge :: Better late than never… :: November :: 2008 said,

    November 25, 2008 at 7:47

    [...] * Cf. [...]

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