21
E-Fail
Well, this1 is certainly a riveting turn of events.
———- Original Message —–
From: Ed Hale2
To: William Bower
Sent: Friday, October 17, 2008 7:17 PM
Subject: Audio TapeHi Will: I have been in contact with the African Press International, who ran the Michelle Obama story. I have talked to them about releasing the audio tape they have of her. It would appear that this is going to happen. The format will be, I will bring the reporter on and let them tell us how they obtained the tape, and then I will run the audio tape, and bring the reporter back on to verify that it is the real thing. Once I have this done, I will place it on my web site, file for and get a copyright on it. Once I have this done, I will contact you with the link. What I would like for you, since you live in Washington DC, to do is contact CNN, Fox, NBC, CBS, ABC and MSNBC. Let them listen to the audio tape. I will then take bid on this tape. The starting bid will be 2 million dollars. Once you have received the high bid, we will break the money down this way, 45% to Bar H Farms Inc, parent copy of Plains Radio network, 45% to African Press International and 10% for yourself. If you can do this, please call me at 806-447-[XXXX]. Thanks Ed
That would be this Ed Hale and this William Bower. And also, as it happens, this William Bower.
If the email is a fake, this game is being played at a level that we can only admire.
But Confederate Yankee, Gateway Pundit, Stop The ACLU, Newsbusters, and the rest of the herd must still be feeling pretty positive about their endorsement of the original API story, given all evidence. And indeed, all of our jollity and sprightly impudence could recurse tragically upon us at approximately 4PM Norwegian time on Monday, October 20th, when the…
…Oh wait.
But apparently, the train keeps-a-rollin’, as it were. Please give a warm hand to our next contestant, Mr. Jerome Corsi:
Author : jerome.corsi (IP: 167.136.[XXX.XX] ,[XXX].com)
E-mail : jerome.corsi@[XXX].com
URL :
Whois : http://ws.arin.net/cgi-bin/whois.pl?queryinput=167.136.[XXX.XX]Comment:
I intend to serve as a facilitator who will help you draw your own conclusions about Ed Hale. That is, I’ll be your “guide on the side”, not a “sage on the stage”. With my assistance, you’ll soon gain a deep understanding of how Hale’s sense of humor runs the gamut from rude and crude to disingenuous and barbaric. For complete details, I refer you to my forthcoming book on the subject. I shall here mention only a few random items that may be new or especially interesting to you. For instance, Hale appears to have found a new tool to use to help him pander to prolix schmoes. That tool is denominationalism, and if you watch him wield it, you’ll unquestionably see why on several occasions I have heard him state that truth is whatever your grievance group says it is. I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a comment. What I consider far more important though is that Hale has come up with proven methods to subvert time-tested societal
norms. All you have to do is let your guard down.However sappy the national picture already is, Hale’s wisecracks are based on a denial of reality, on the substitution of a deliberately falsified picture of the world in place of reality. And this dishonesty, this refusal to admit the truth, will have some very serious…
1 Story background here.
2 All IP, phone, and email data redacted.
D.N. Nation said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:15
So, you’ve got it all figured out, don’t you?
Gerald Curl said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:17
Since you live in a city where none of these networks are headquartered and you have access to a telegraph and steam locomotive, please deliver my phonograph recording to them.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:19
Any reason that tape looks like an ape suit in a freezer?
whitey said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:21
Sure, go ahead and laugh, but when you LEAST expect it, they’re I’ll be.
Um, WHEN you least expect it…
I said, WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT…
Dammit…
Caitlin Sith said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:22
“Listen, Jerry, we’re gonna need a lot more than $2 million OK? Blood has been SHED! Blood has been SHED!”
“Now hold on, Ed” (in the background someone complaining about TruCoat), “I thought the deal was 4:00 p.m. Norwegian time, ya?”
Zandar1 said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:24
Shortly after the Michelle Obama tape was auctioned off for $2 million worth of cheetos and a sammich, the files mysteriously disappeared from the African Press International offices.
CS Lewis Jr. said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:26
If the lesson here is that wingnuts will believe anything, no matter how obviously ridiculous, as long as it reinforces their fantasy world … I knew that already. Thank you for making this mildly entertaining, however. It does provide a break from the “Obama is an Arab Muslim Socialist Terrorist and, what the hell, Gay Black Abortionist” howler-monkeys.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:28
Why don’t they just put the tape up on eBay?
Gary Ruppert said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:28
The fact is goddam, even I’m not that gullible.
SamFromUtah said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:30
If Elwyn Tinklenberg can raise $2M in two days, the wingnuts should be able to raise it much faster. Tinklenberg was limited to the tiny minority of Democrats and anti-Americans who, mysteriously, run everything.
Dave M said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:32
According to a commenter at that last link, “Barack is going crazy on national news to get people to vote early and now. He is pushing hard for early votes, due to your tapes.”
Shouldn’t that be “early and often”?
Coach Urban Meyer said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:32
Well, well, well! The Cool Coach spies the loony libs here at Sadly, D’oh! getting a little bit worried over the Obummer’s flaws. Getting a bit worried, lefties? Worried about a SPREAD of VICTORY, perhaps? Worried that McCaniacs are gonna come out in full force to say no to Obummer and Joltless Joe?
Well ding dong dilly, you better believe that the Cool Coach sees it! You loony libs are runnin’ scared, afraid of the SPREAD of TRUTH offered by the Comeback Mac and Super Sarah, the Power Palin!
Badoodle-boo-yeah! You just got told, lefties! Urban out.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:32
Wow, that API web site is one swell piece of work.
I especially like the little black-diamonds-with-questions-marks-in-them characters that they have sprinkled throughout.
It reminds me of the symbols used in downhill skiing, in the “Now, here’s a steep trail rated safe only for expert skiers. Should I take a chance and try it anyway?” sense of the sport.
Legalize said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:34
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:35
Badoodle-boo-yeah! You just got told, lefties!
God damn it, I just got told again. When will I learn?
Gavin M. said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:36
[Updated with new link and add'l quote...]
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:36
Any reason that tape looks like an ape suit in a freezer?
*muttering*
fuckingratbastardRBbeatmetotheBigfootjoke…
SamFromUtah said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:37
Wow, that API web site is one swell piece of work.
Ain’t it just? I noticed that my eyes unfocused after about 2 seconds of reading Corsi’s scrawlings there.
Then I noticed the same thing happened when I tried to read the excerpt here. Huh.
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:38
Gavin,
Based on the Corsi update, it does seem as tho that $2 million will be, um, subject to a suit for fraud?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:39
The recording that shows Michelle Obama saying disparaging things about white folks is for real. It is not part of some elaborate dirty trick. The people who have seen her comments describe it as “stunning” or “devastating.” I have not spoken directly with the people who have seen the tape, but I have spoken to two of my friends who are friends with those who watched the tape/dvd.
I now appreciate somewhat how Cofer Black, the head of the CIA’s Counter Terrorism Center, must have felt as he tried to warn Condaleeza Rice and the Bush White House about a brewing terrorist attack in the days leading up to September 11th. And please, I am not equating the Michelle tape with the attacks of 9-11. Rather I am focused on the point of what happens when someone has incomplete information, which warns about a future event, and tries to raise the alert. Just because Cofer Black could not say in late July 2001 that the coming attack would be carried out by 19 hijackers on four commercial airliners did not mean his intelligence was wrong.
Those who want to vilify me for having the audacity to raise this warning can have at it. I ran up against similar attacks and skeptics in May of 2003 when I warned that the Bush Administration had cooked the intelligence on Iraq. It is only now that we get a Senate Intelligence Committee Report and a book from Scott McClellan confirming what I said five years ago.
Let me conclude with this–I think there is at least one tape/recording that will be released sometime after the August convention and is likely to be very damaging to the Barack Obama presidential campaign. While I hope that Super Delegates wake up and realize that Hillary is their best shot for victory in the fall, I realize I am swimming upstream. So word to Barrack and team–the tape is coming at some point and you folks better be ready to deal with it because, unlike the situations with Jeremiah Wright and Michael Pfleger, you cannot divorce your wife in the middle of a campaign.
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:42
Er, Coach CUM?
That was 4:00 PM Oslo time…YESTERDAY!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH The only fail more epic than APIs is YOURS!
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:44
Does anyone else get the same sense that I get, that Cornfed and Gateway and all them are trying to find a black woman to do a voiceover on a cassette?
Loneoak said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:47
The funny thing is, white folk don’t need MIchelle Obama to disparage us. We do just fine on our own.
OT: my friend has produced some really great Obama fundraising T-shirts that any nerds in the house will likely love.
Larry Johnson said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:49
Yeah, what Dragon-King said.
g said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:50
Did you redact the part where Ed asks them for their bank account numbers and says he is writing on behalf of a very important government official who is unable to access his funds?
Grand Moff Texan said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:51
What the fuck is going on?
.
PeeJ said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:51
All you have do is please forward by this communication important informations will allow to place tape directly in your
bankwebsight.Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:51
fuckingratbastardRBbeatmetotheBigfootjoke…
Join us as we go in search of… a better Bigfoot joke.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:53
Am I out of my mind or is the API site now blanked?
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:54
I’m out of my mind. Woo woo!
F'in Librul said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:55
If that’s how Corsi’s books are written, he is breathtakingly bad. Just. Wow.
“prolix”? Is he TRYING to become the butt of Catch-22 jokes?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:00
I’m out of my mind. Woo woo!
Good thing, else you’d be missing:
g said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:02
API and a US Law firm
Yes, but are they a New York Law Firm?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:03
There are those who doubt the legitimacy of the tapes – but to those that do, I offer this one simple argument:
Teh Buttocks.
Cain said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:05
How does Philip Berg’s business model work? Since he seems to soley represent complete wackjobs (including himself) whose cases always end in dismissal, I’m guessing he doesn’t work on contingency.
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:06
“prolix”? Is he TRYING to become the butt of Catch-22 jokes?
Prolix? Buttocks? Get it? *winkwink*
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:07
LAW OFFICES OF PHILIP J. BERG
Lionel Hutz, Of Counsel.
HumboldtBlue said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:08
I recommended that the API folks get that tape to Africa Bambaataa immediately! Stat! ASAP!
Then FOX News can talk with Africa Bambaataa about what it all means, because I’m sure none of you whitey’s can understand African like FOX News can.
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:10
Join us as we go in search of… a better Bigfoot joke.
(cut to Robert Stack in trenchcoat)
Tonight, on Unsolved Mysteries, the case of the missing sense of humour…
bladule said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:16
I’m not an american, nor a native english speaker, so could anyone of you sadlynauts confirm that the grammar/syntax of Ed hale’s email is, er…, questionable?
Also, as far as I know, nobody “file for and get a copyright on” anything. Or, maybe, I missed something and Norvege is no longer part of the Berne Convention (Or maybe the US)?
Tom65 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:18
I’m confused. Does Will Bower have to show up in Nigeria before they deposit the $2 million in his bank account, or after they’ve withdrawn the $100 million?
PeeJ said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:19
Just released, McCain campaign job interview videos.
I am stunned. I never thought the 101st Fighting Keyboarders and Kerners Auxiliary could out-fail those dimwits. Somehow, they keep surprising me by redefining “inanity.”
Smut Clyde said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:25
Was Jerome Corsi’s letter written by the Insult Generator, or was the Insult Generator seeded with examples of Corsi’s prose? I am genuinely bumfuzzled.
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:28
Definetly the A team iis on this.
From Law.com. (can’t get linky to work)
Finding that a Pennsylvania lawyer had committed a “laundry list of unethical actions,” a federal judge has imposed more than $10,000 in sanctions and ordered the lawyer to complete six hours of ethics training.
U.S. District Judge J. Curtis Joyner’s 10-page opinion in Holsworth v. Berg is packed with criticism of the conduct of attorney Philip Berg of Lafayette Hill, Pa.
“Other attorneys should look to Mr. Berg’s actions as a blueprint for what not to do when attempting to effectively and honorably perform the duties of the legal profession,” Joyner wrote.
“This court has grown weary of Mr. Berg’s continuous and brazen disrespect toward this court and his own clients. Mr. Berg’s actions … are an enormous waste of judicial time and resources that this court cannot, in good conscience, allow to go unpunished,” Joyner wrote.
In the suit, Berg is accused of legal malpractice by former clients who claim his failure to respond to an ERISA claim against them led to a default judgment.
http://www.law.com/jsp/article.jsp?id=1122023117263
kiki said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:29
Par for the course, I suppose. Many of these people genuinely believe that Jesus is going to come back one day and kill Jon Stewart for them.
Gary Ruppert said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:30
McCain is already outdrawing Obama in numerous sites.
For example, McCain drew in 28% of the population of Belton, while Obama only drew in 17% of the population of Kansas City and 3% of the St. Louis Metro Area.
That’s not even accounting for the fact that Obama rallies are not as large as you all think. For one thing, the organizers inflate totals by as much as 50%
Rightwingsnarkle said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:33
I think PeeJ is trying to get us all to look at porn.
Thank you, PeeJ.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:35
Thank you, PeeJ.
Seconded. It’s pr0n, but not the pr0n you think it is. It’s really just an incredible compilation of boobs. Some of them so hot that they are literally on fire.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:36
I call real Gary.
kiki said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:36
Was Jerome Corsi’s letter written by the Insult Generator …?
On reading the whole thing, I think it clearly was; someone having a little fun, perhaps, or maybe Jerome’s just a lazy fucker as well as a lying piece of shit.
Josh St. Lawrence said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:38
Hi, folks. I haven’t dropped in lately because my doctor thought I might be missing part of my brain. But the tests show that it’s all there, just smaller than usual.
I want to take exception to yiour Bigfoot jokes. No serious researcher in cryptozoology would ever joke about “Bigfoot” which is properly called Sasquatch. There are several credible videos of Sasquatch. I can’t find any credible evidence for Bigfoot, nor have I ever seen any Bigfoot video. I suspect the reason there is no evidence for Bigfoot is that the Yeti killed them off long ago, thus preventing us from collecting any specimens.
I hope some of you will take the opportunity to learn more about the exciting and lucrative field of cryptozoology. One great way to get into the field can be found at SallyStruthers.com.
Smut Clyde said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:39
not the pr0n you think it is. It’s really just an incredible compilation of boobs.
Fortunately I am easily pleased.
Mr. Wonderful said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:40
Grand Moff Texan said,
“What the fuck is going on?”
What he said.
But wait–why the link to the November calendar, Gavin? To remind us that Nov. 23 is National Cashew Day? As if anyone here could forget?
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:42
Is a pumpkin a sasquatch or is it a gourd?
Matt McMahon said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:42
What would I do without Barack Obama to provide me with a non-stop source of blockish memoranda to complain about? First off, there is one crucial fact that we must not overlook if we are to perceive our current situation as it is, rather than in the anamorphosis of some “ideology” such as radicalism or Maoism. Specifically, I would unmistakably like to comment on Obama’s attempt to associate hedonism with teetotalism. There is no association. The next time someone says that the rules don’t apply to Obama, look that person right in the eye and reply, “Obama’s goals coalesce with those of gin-swilling uppity-types.”
Note that it is not uncommon for Obama to victimize the innocent, penalize the victim for making any effort to defend himself, and then paint the whole effrontive affair as some great benefit to humanity. He has stated that war is peace, freedom is slavery, and ignorance is strength. That’s just pure obscurantism. Well, in Obama’s case, it might be pure ignorance, seeing that this is not wild speculation. This is not a conspiracy theory. This is documented fact. Despite total incompetence, Obama is often afflicted with an amazing conceit that causes him to engage in the trafficking of human beings.
Believe you me, Obama insists that those of us who oppose him would rather run than fight. This fraud, this lie, is just one among the thousands he perpetrates. The truth hurts, doesn’t it, Obama? In conclusion, let me just say that one immanent characteristic of Barack Obama’s publications is that they show us a gross miscarriage of common judgment.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:44
Fake Josh as the latter was eaten.
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:49
Matt McMahon said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:42
Yeti or Bigfoot?
Nessie said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:49
This is just to say,
I have eaten the cryptozoologist that was tooling about in a long range submersible and which you were probably saving for insights into the Sasquatch.
Forgive me, but he was delicious. So sweet and so thorough.
Smut Clyde said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:50
Expanded and modified from that previous zoocryptology thread:
The sexual life of the sasquatch
Is stranger than you’d ever guess.
One day in the blindness of passion
He went for the ass of Loch Ness.
But Nessie’s posterior passage
Is blocked by the sounds of denial
Which accounts for the “big foot” of Sasquatch,
And Nessie’s inscrutable smile.
J— said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:50
So many
piratesfreelancers, so little time before the election.actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:52
For example, McCain drew in 28% of the population of Belton, while Obama only drew in 17% of the population of Kansas City and 3% of the St. Louis Metro Area.
Wow, that Belton, nobody goes there anymore, there’s too many people!
Josh St. Lawrence said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:52
Like Jonah exiting the whale (not to be confused with Jonah the Whale) I survived my time in Nessie to be ejected through her poop chute in fine fettle though now resembling a right wing pundit.
actor212 said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:54
I can’t find any credible evidence for Bigfoot, nor have I ever seen any Bigfoot video. I suspect the reason there is no evidence for Bigfoot is that the Yeti killed them off long ago, thus preventing us from collecting any specimens.
They all are posted here, Josh: Bigfoot.net
protected static said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:57
Corsi’s ‘email’ has to be a cut-and-paste job… The phrase “I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a comment.” positively leaped out at me – it’s a quote from Charles Babbage*.
Also, the specific sequence “I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a comment. What I consider far more important though is that ” occurs way too often to be real…
*I had the full Babbage quote taped to my cubical walls for years…
protected static said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:59
Hunh. The St. Louis Police Department is organizing Obama’s rallies? Who knew?
Smut Clyde said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:59
Ddn’t Harlan Ellison write a story where the soul of Charles Babbage becomes trapped inside a software Letter-of-Complaint Generator?
J— said,
October 21, 2008 at 22:59
Chief Editor Korir (emphasis in original):
No sign of money involved? Now that’s un-American!
protected static said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:03
@Smut Clyde: if he did, I’d love to read it.
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:05
Obama rally draws 100,000 in St. Louis
The Associated Press
That’s only 3%?!
Southern Beale said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:05
Who are Bar H Farms Inc. and Plains Radio network?
Southern Beale said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:09
Oh, never mind. I just googled Bar H Farms and Google says “Bar H Farms is a pure bread [sic] cattle entity located in Western Pennsylvania.”
Pure bread.
Words fail.
MzNicky said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:10
why the link to the November calendar, Gavin?
Only one of many, many questions I have about this whole situation.
And no wingnutzes have yet made a big point of Obama using that old “sick grandmother” excuse to leave for two days in HAWAII just as the well-respected and totally not-made-up African News International or whatever is getting ready to expose Michelle Obama’s racist rage rant recording to the whole world? Slackers! It’s like they’re not even really trying anymore.
Chief Editor Korir-bot said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:14
API has an ongoing discussion on the best way to go forward in a negotiation to reach an agreement as soon as possible so that the process of releasing Michelle Obama tapes can be made available to FOX NEWS specifically before the vote allienation day – the 4th of November when finalising the hand-over of the tapes and any legal matters that may get really hot and wet with nasty action 24 hour girls direct to your room get off with no sign of bears involved or misused by those who may wish to satisfy their own interests and achieve an erection lasting three or more hours should see Phillp Berg finally gets access to its contents and use them wisely but may see side effects such as shortness of breath, nausea or visiting Free Republic the touchy interview tapes of Michelle Obama that has a good reputation in the US, one that has listeners interested in the erections lasting more than three hours we ask the readers to bear with us. We owe you the truth and the tapes being released.
Bar H Farms said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:15
Hi Will: I have been in contact with the Cryptozoology Press International, who ran the Bigfoot story. I have talked to them about releasing the video tape they have of him. It would appear that this is going to happen. The format will be, I will bring the reporter on and let them tell us how they obtained the tape, and then I will run the video tape, and bring the reporter back on to verify that it is the real thing. Once I have this done, I will place it on my web site, file for and get a copyright on it from those copyright people in DC. Once I have this done, I will contact you with the link. What I would like for you, since you live in Okeefanokee, to do is contact CNN, Fox, NBC, CBS, ABC and MSNBC. Let them watch the video tape. I will then take bid on this tape. The starting bid will be 2 million bags of cheetos. Once you have received the high bid, we will break the deliciousness down this way, 45% to Bar H Farms Inc, parent copy of Plains Radio network, 45% to African Press International and 10% for yourself-dood, that’s two hundred THOUSAND bags of synthetic orange goodness. If you can do this, please call me at 806-447-[XXXX]. Thanks Ed
Smut Clyde said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:18
Bar H Farms is a pure bread [sic] cattle entity
I for one welcome this dawning of a new age of genetically-engineered self-slicing steak sandwiches.
Don Mega said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:20
Grand Moff Texan said,
October 21, 2008 at 21:51
What the fuck is going on?
*******************************
Here’s the rundown:
1. In all her spare time, Michele Obama decides to give an interview to an “African Press International” organization that no one has ever heard of that uses a free Typepad account.
2. During said interview, Mrs. Obama decides to cut loose and really let us whiteys know how little she cares for us. Because, ya know, they are ALL the way over in Africa…err Norway, and Mrs. Obama is unaware of the Intertubes.
3. The same cast of morons and halfwits who claimed to have the last oh-so-shocking “whitey tape” pour forward like a bunch of retarded ants crowing about their non-existant “proof”.
4. The sane world yawns.
protected static said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:21
@Snort: The city proper is approx. 350,000. The greater metro area is approx. 2.8 million, so 100,000 would be 3.6% or so.
A bunch of retarded ants said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:22
Don Mega will regret that comparison, next time he goes for a picnic.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:23
I for one welcome this dawning of a new age of genetically-engineered self-slicing steak sandwiches.
I cannot bear when the younger and smaller ones are slaughtered. The bunyips will haunt me to my dying day.
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:23
Slackers! It’s like they’re not even really trying anymore.
Can’t. Even the strawman got so sick of their crap he took a hike.
MzNicky said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:24
4. The sane world
yawnslaughs itself silly once again.Fixey.
Gary Ruppert said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:28
Obama’s grandmother is the one who has admitted tht her grandson was born in Kenya, so it’s no stunner that she’s being swept under the rug by Obama.
Anyways, it’s time for McCain to go on the offensive as Obama is away.
rerun said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:29
he must have a great lawyer to advise him on “filing” for the copyright.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:30
We must stop the copyright filing or I will never be able to say “all dirt” again.
Snort said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:33
Anyways, it’s time for McCain to be offensive as Obama is away.
Fixey day.
Thanks protected static. I didn’t realize the metro area was so big.
T. Hussein said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:33
Nevermind the Buttocks?
g said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:36
Okay, who let the cryptozoology people in?
Righteous Bubba said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:37
Who let them out?
The Goddamn Batman Wishes That He Could Punch Out People Over The Internet, Right Through Their Monitors, Biff Bam Pow! said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:40
Some people say that I should track down clowns like these and make them pay, but you know, I do one cybercrime case, next thing you know I’ll never get out of the Batcave and Alfred will have to put me on a diet. It’s like, the other day, Clark was all “you should tackle cybercrime” and I’m like “why” and he’s like “I just think that you would be very well-suited to do so” and I’m like “what the hell are you trying to say” and he’s like “look man you go out there all the time and wail on these dudes and one day you’re going to get your jaw shot off and you know that I can take them out without getting hurt even the Joker” and I’m like “as long as we’re talking about how powerful you are I gotta ask you something” and he’s like “whut” and I’m like “why haven’t you reversed time by flying around the earth until you change its rotation and saved John Lennon’s life” and he’s like “well even a Superman shouldn’t interfere in mankind’s destiny” and I’m like “it’s because all of his future albums would suck isn’t it” and he’s like “whoops there goes Jimmy’s signal watch gotta fly.”
What a farm boy.
League of Smarty Ants said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:51
WE OBJECT to the use of the phrase “retarded ants” in any context, as a juvenile insult against ants in general, or toward so called “retarded” ants in particular. When we find a “slow” or “incapable” ant in our army we eat them so they do not slow us down in our quest for colony growth.
Josh St Larry said,
October 21, 2008 at 23:56
We have found Chupacabra!
Jose de Pepe said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:15
In Mexico, cheetohs eat chupacabra!
SamFromUtah said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:16
I voted early, teh yhey!
With two weeks left to go before the Real American Election, I can get to work using up some of those fraudulent ACORN registrations.
Anybody seen my Captain Ahab fake I.D.?
Gully Foyle said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:26
I voted early, again.
Vito Corleone said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:26
I voted early. I’ll do it again tomorrow.
John McCain said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:27
I tried to vote early but I couoldn’t figure out how to use that computer thingy.
Every Hanna Barbera and Warner Bros. cartoon character said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:29
We all voted today.
Principal Blackman said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:30
I’m guessing he doesn’t work on contingency.
Works on contingency. No money down.
TROY MCCLURE: “Oh, this thing’s all wrong.”
Works on contingency? No, money down!
Righteous Bubba said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:31
Every Hanna Barbera and Warner Bros. cartoon character said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:29 (kill)
We all voted today.
I’m betting nobody challenged the Grape Ape.
Joseph "Big Daddy" Stalin said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:31
I don’t give a fuck who votes. My buddies at Diebold and ESS will be counting them so eat my iron shorts.
John Bigbutte said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:34
I tried to vote today but the only registration they had was for John Bigabooty. Cursa you Banzai!
T. Hussein said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:34
ftfy
Every Disney cartoon character said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:48
We would have voted today, but Mickey hadda go blabbing and blew it for us.
Boo Boo Bear said,
October 22, 2008 at 0:53
But Yogi, Ranger Smith’s not going to like that…
MzNicky said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:10
I will early-vote tomorrow, although I do love Election Day. I was explaining this to the Spouse tonight at dinner. As a Type A obsessive-compulsive sort he voted the first day of early voting “to get it out of the way.” I on the other hand actually enjoy standing in line to vote. It’s like people-watching at the airport. I like to eavesdrop on politically-charged citizens’ conversations, even if they’re not overtly Dem. It’s like a secular holiday, I told the Spouse, and I love it more than Thanksgiving which, given my vegetarianism yet familial obligation to serve a huge-ass dinner to 25 or 30 extended-family members each year, blows.
The Phool said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:12
I’m like “why haven’t you reversed time by flying around the earth until you change its rotation and saved John Lennon’s life” and he’s like “well even a Superman shouldn’t interfere in mankind’s destiny” and I’m like “it’s because all of his future albums would suck isn’t it” and he’s like “whoops there goes Jimmy’s signal watch gotta fly.”
Typical of you ignorant punk rockers to disrespect John Lennon this way.
Self-important conspiracy bore said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:14
Superman was right not to interfere! I know people who told me sordid things about Lennon, and I believe every word!
Wesley Willis said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:17
I wupped Batman’s ass.
J— said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:22
Bertha Butt and her three sisters voted today.
Gary Ruppert said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:23
The fact is, Your Boy Obama is GOING DOWN. Hard. He is being exposed as a socialists, which means real Americans would never vote for him. You coastal eleiteists are as fake Americans as he is, and here in the Heartland we’ve got no use for you faggots.
killer said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:26
bootay! tay! tay!!
Orange Tom said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:27
Shit. These fukkers are shafting us sideways:
http://bailoutsleuth.com/2008/10/more-bailout-contracts-contain-blacked-out-portions/
Orange Tom said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:30
It’s like a secular holiday, I told the Spouse, and I love it more than Thanksgiving which, given my vegetarianism yet familial obligation to serve a huge-ass dinner to 25 or 30 extended-family members each year, blows.
Tofurky, babe!
Gary Ruppert said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:30
The fact is, the liberal media is in the tank for Obama, and they are not reporting on the poles that show McCain in the lead with the Military, keeping us safe, the vote that liberals want to disallow because they hate the military, who are keeping us free and the USA and freedom. They also want Shania Law just to be nice to Muslims but the 10 commandments — ILLEGAL. You faggots trying to get us all killed are traiters and should be shot and pissed on.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:32
Poll: Palin Is Now The Top Concern Voters Have About McCain
mikey said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:33
Worst fake gary yet.
Truly bottom of the Ruppert stuff.
Shove the eliminationist shit right up your ass.
And what the hell. The rest is just stupid, old and boring, so shove that up your ass too…
mikey
MzNicky said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:33
Orange Tom: Mais non, mon cherie. The flesh-eaters are required to bring their own dead bird products. I make pies, cranberry sauce, spinach salad and smashed taters and offshore the rest.
Mr. Wonderful said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:35
Gully Foyle said,
“I voted early, again.”
Good idea. What with the synaesthesia, the jumping around, the burning, etc. Better to get it over with while you can.
John Whorfin said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:35
I didn’t vote today! It’s not my goddam planet!
Gary Ruppert said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:35
The fact is, I think liberals deserve to die, because they make babies die, allow Americans to die without payback and they also poo and pee on our flag and call it free speech. Obama does not respect our flag, and we notice this in the Heartland. He will loose.
MzNicky said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:36
“offshore”? What am I even trying to say? “outsource,” I guess. Bah.
protected static said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:36
@Gary:
Admit it, Gary… You don’t come here for the hunting, do you?
Righteous Bubba said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:38
Any word verbs in English.
a bunch of retarded ants said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:41
Where’s the picnic at?
Righteous Bubba said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:43
Where’s the picnic at?
Jesus Christ. OVER THERE.
Righteous Bubba said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:45
The tiny hockey helmets are kind of cute though.
Snorghagen said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:47
A commenter on the API Jerome Corsi thread:
Yow!!! Sheep riots!!! Lemme outta here!!!
SamFromUtah said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:48
The tiny hockey helmets are kind of cute though.
LOLz!
Rightwingsnarkle said,
October 22, 2008 at 1:50
I filled out an absentee ballot at the Town House today.
For some reason, we don’t call it ‘town hall.’ Maybe it’s not big enough to be a hall? Or maybe the term ‘town house’ is more in line with the quaint and intimate atmosphere we try so hard to cultivate here. Tourists like quaint.
Anywhoozle, since absentee is the only early voting option available in the People’s Republic of Massachusetts, and since I gotta work on the 4th and will leave before the polls open and return only after they’ve closed, it was absentee or nothing.
I’m happy to do my part to put the Bay State in Obama’s column. It was looking pretty dicey there for a while.
John Kerry will probably also have the race of his life this time around. At least Jim Ogonowski failed to get enough sigs for a spot on the ballot. Ogonowski woulda creamed Kerry.
Ah, ha ha ha! For a moment there, I actually felt like a wingnut.
Whew. Where’s the bartender?
OneMan said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:00
“Yow!!! Sheep riots!!! Lemme outta here!!!”
Don’t mess with the sheep!
Smut Clyde said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:07
Sheep riots are no laughing matter.
Dimwitted anteater said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:09
Nom nom nom OW
Fucking crunchy bits.
Ultravox said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:12
Some vote too early
and some vote too late.
Orange Tom said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:15
“offshore”? What am I even trying to say? “outsource,” I guess. Bah.
Nah, “offshoring” your dinner sounds very classy, like having it flown in from Switzerland or sumthin’.
mikey said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:19
Outsource.
Offshore.
Offworld.
Off my rocker.
Outta my mind.
I’m messing around with a new Caprese Salad recipe tonight.
With the eloquent and non-carnivorous MzNicky in mind…
mikey
YooHooligan said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:25
They also want Shania Law just to be nice to Muslims but the 10 commandments — ILLEGAL.
If this comes with a box of Timbits and some poutine, sign me the fuck up.
Mmm, Timbits.
ckc (not kc) said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:26
Canned Heat, Sadly, No!, and shiraz….
…aaaahh
Jrod said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:30
I’ll be your “guide on the side”, not a “sage on the stage”. I’m the “man with the plan” to guide you through this “bungle in the jungle”. We’ll “rule with the cool” and we’ll “bevel on the level”. This is about “truth raising the roof” not “spin for the win”. This investigation is “serious not delirious” and isn’t “pie in the sky”. “Why ask why”? Wait, what was I talking about? Oh, right, Michelle Obama was caught on tape killing and skinning white children. It was awesome! I mean horrible, just horrible.
Orange Tom said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:32
I’m messing around with a new Caprese Salad recipe tonight.
Ah, synchronicity! I’m trying insalata di finocchio from a recipe in the October issue of La Cucina Italiana. Simple and delicious!
mikey said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:33
The interesting question, especially if the election is effectively over before the polls close out here on the left edge, is whether excitement over Obama will bring out the vote that will defeat the repugnant Proposition 8, or will california’s disgust with Prop 8 bring out the vote for Obama?
mikey
mikey said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:38
I’m trying insalata di finocchio…
Dude, you’re making a salad out of a wooden puppet’s nose?
Isn’t that going to be kind of tasteless, not to mention hard to chew?
And waitaminute, didn’t they use Lead Paint to finish those puppets?
Seems all wrong to…
Huh? Really? You sure?
Ok.
Never mind…
mikey
Orange Tom said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:44
Dude, you’re making a salad out of a wooden puppet’s nose?
Some would think so. Finocchio = fennel, sliced as thin as possible (break out the Bron Mandoline and watch yer knuckles), salt, toss with extra virgin olive oil (lots) and sprinkle with black pepper. I haven’t eaten that since I was a kid, just out of the Legion. Took a leaky sailboat from North Africa to Sardinia and found culinary Heaven!
Rightwingsnarkle said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:45
They also want Shania Law…
Ah
Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip yip
boom boom boom boom boom boom
Get a job
PeeJ said,
October 22, 2008 at 2:46
Jaques Pepin made a “fancy” caprese salad on one of his PBS shows. He sliced the tomato vertically, but not sliciing all the way through. Slices of mozz and leaves of basil go between the slices. Thing looks sort of like a bird. Then he sez, in that cute Frenchie accent, “In the restaurant, you know, you charge $7 for caprese salad but do it this way and you can charge $12 you know”
Among the funniest cooking show moments ever.
SamFromUtah said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:28
They also want Shania Law just to be nice to Muslims but the 10 commandments — ILLEGAL.
You know, if they outlawed the 10 commandments, many of these jokers wouldn’t miss six or seven of them, on account of not knowing them and all.
I think that instead of outlawing the commandments, we just replace half of them with stuff like “thou shalt not impose regressive taxation schemes” and see if anybody notices.
justme said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:36
Those guys at API really need to have a chat with whatever developmentally disabled chinchilla passes for a webmaster. It doesn’t make them look good. Literally .
MzNicky said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:42
I’m happy to do my part to put the Bay State in Obama’s column.
Lucky bastard. As a denizen of a “so totally red state that neither McLame nor Barry X even bother to come down here,” I will as usual cast my basically useless vote for the Dem.
MzNicky said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:45
I’m messing around with a new Caprese Salad recipe tonight. With the eloquent and non-carnivorous MzNicky in mind…
Oooh, talk fresh spinach and mozzarella to me, baby! Can you still get decent tomatoes this time o’ year over there in Cali-forn-i-ay?
owlbear1 said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:54
Isn’t it a bit tragic how many gyrations Republicans have to go through just to get an erection?
Bitter Scribe said,
October 22, 2008 at 3:56
Is insalata di finnochio served with spaghetti alla puttanesca?
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 22, 2008 at 4:08
Isn’t it a bit tragic how many gyrations Republicans have to go through just to get an erection?
Personally, I like the gyrations to start after I get an erection – but I’m always game for something new.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
October 22, 2008 at 4:12
Also, as a lazy fucker who thinks the idea of using a knife on salad is just way too much work – I like grape tomatoes, boccocini, basil chiffonade – simple oil, balsamic, sea salt and cracked black pepper dressing. I eat it out of a bowl. I call it a salad bowl. Salad plates are elitist.
Anonymous said,
October 22, 2008 at 4:26
Gary (apparently the real one) Ruppert said:
For example, McCain drew in 28% of the population of Belton, while Obama only drew in 17% of the population of Kansas City and 3% of the St. Louis Metro Area.
Ho. Lee. Crap.
I live in Belton, Texas. The incorporated area had a population of 17,300 in 2007.
I had NO IDEA John McCain had a rally here. It must have flown completely under the radar, unlike our Fourth of July parade and the Bell County Rodeo.
But what’s really scary is: WAS GARY RUPPERT IN BELTON? He had to be, right? Counting the people at the McCain rally to make sure the MSM didn’t fudge the numbers?
OH MY GOD, GARY RUPPERT WAS IN MY TOWN, COUNTIN’ MY DOODZ!!!!!!ELEVEN!!
Nigel Tufnel said,
October 22, 2008 at 4:27
The previous message by “anonymous” was posted by me. And these go up to eleven.
EnfantTerrible said,
October 22, 2008 at 4:32
Hey! I’ve got Edison cylinders of Jeremiah Wright and Bill Ayers rapping Lil Jon’s greatest hits. I want in on this action.
Az said,
October 22, 2008 at 5:27
The tape will not be published which will prove beyond all doubt that :
1. The tape was for real and
2. it was stolen by Barack Hussein Obama .
As bonus it will also prove that all Africans/Balcks are scamsters and it was all a conspiracy to make the wingnut blogosphere look foolish .
SamFromUtah said,
October 22, 2008 at 5:38
As a denizen of a “so totally red state that neither McLame nor Barry X even bother to come down here,” I will as usual cast my basically useless vote for the Dem.
Right there with you.
jim said,
October 22, 2008 at 5:57
Thank you for the latest ride on the Lollercoaster – good thing I was strapped in this time. The cameo by Jerome “Swift Boat BS” Corsi is especially piquant.
The American Media has been disgraceful. Fox stands heads and shoulders above the rest
Well, give ‘em 1/2-marks, anyway.
Bit of an enigma here, though – I mean with the API’s whole “we’re fiercely dedicated to getting Teh Truth about the Obama Tape out there to the public” schtick & all … logically assuming the existance of an API website means they’ve got a PC & a modem, why not just PLAY the friggin’ tape on a podcast?
Podcasting is an excellent means of spreading info that’s both instant & global. A podcast is basically free to anybody with a cheap-ass computer & a connection to La Interwebz. Sheesh!
Are podcasts banned in Norway or what?
Smells a tad like over-ripe kippers to me.
Grover Gardner said,
October 22, 2008 at 6:29
And I often wonder who would be so stupid as to fall for those Nigerian emails. I need wonder no longer.
Jerkah Wankberg said,
October 22, 2008 at 6:44
So, when does the Rick Astley tape show up?
Bony Baloney said,
October 22, 2008 at 7:10
Protected Static: that leaped out at me, too. I think Parliament was asking Babbage about his machine and one of them asked if putting the wrong numbers in would still produce the right result.
One of the Axis powers had the high command questioning their scientists about atom bombs, and asked something like “This design requires a buttload of uranium. Why not use a similar buttload of conventional explosives?” The response was something like “Did your parents have any kids that lived?” I can’t imagine a Japanese saying it, or a German saying it to the Nazis, but I vividly remember reading about it. Ehh, it was probably made up.
protected static said,
October 22, 2008 at 7:42
@BB: That’s the one!
justme said,
October 22, 2008 at 8:40
Jerkah,
Michelle is never going to give you up…
krassen said,
October 22, 2008 at 13:07
This is all a bunch of BS. there are nutjobs on both sides; I even heard how evidence will be leaked that – get this – the McCain campaign has spent a few grands of RNC money on Sarah Palin’s hair!
Sadly, No! » From Case File: No, Wait For It said,
October 29, 2008 at 21:46
[...] I know. The punchline? There are still, even now, right-wing bloggers falling for this tragical shark-jumpery: Michelle Obama Tape to Be Released – Finally?****UPDATE: TODAY? Report of Obama Campaign [...]
Barry from Alaska said,
January 4, 2009 at 14:01
Join us as we go in search of… a better Bigfoot joke.
Try here, it’s Ed! He shot Bigfoot!
http://theregulator.net/?p=1503
Bandita said,
January 6, 2009 at 14:47
BIGFOOT–It’s no joke.
Listen to Ed hale admitting to it
Ed Hale killed two of them, if you don’t believe me see here!!
http://theregulator.net/?p=1561
Bandita said,
January 6, 2009 at 14:48
Hey Barry! LOL!