Oct
7
7
Shorter Rich Lowry
- We can’t rely solely on peddling stupid bullshit if we want to win this time. Instead, John McCain must craft a smart economic program that will benefit the middle cla… oh, who am I kidding? We’re screwed, screwed, screwed!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Me said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:32
Excuse me, but is that an exploded Death Star behind Mr. Lowry or a disco ball?
Loneoak said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:36
Dude, if your handle is “Me”, you cannot start a sentence with “Excuse me.” It makes you sound like Joe Biden.
Hand the Tank Paulson said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:36
Have you met mt boy Kashkari? He’ll be disbursing that 700 billion. No worries…
Righteous Bubba said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:37
Excuse me, but is that an exploded Death Star behind Mr. Lowry or a disco ball?
Now witness the firepower of this fully operational bullshit station!
Rich Lawry's said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:38
I season my campaign advice with a whisper of MSG!
You said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:40
exploding death star or planet earth, it’s all the same to conservatives. The Dark Side exists for a reason.
D.N. Nation said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:43
Except for, you know, the fact that Obama really doesn’t have a “relationship” with a terrorist*.
* who has never been convicted of a crime, I might add
javafascist said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:45
Alternate Shorter Rich Lowry: Today I begin laying the groundwork for why John McCain lost and, you can rest assured, it will be because he was too liberal. Long live Conservatism! (Oh, and Sarah, call me. Please? We can just chat. We’ll be friends…to start.)
tigrismus said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:45
Poor Lowry, still a mite drained from the VP debates.
dBa said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:46
When the Palin/McCain camp whips their crowds into a frenzy chanting “Kill him, Kill Him” in reference to Obama, you can bet the next 4 weeks aren’t going to be a partisan love-in.
I really hate republicans, and Gary Rupert too.
Gary Ruppert's Stunt Double said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:46
* who has never been convicted of a crime, I might add
Nothing a couple years in Gitmo couldn’t fix. Wait…
montysano said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:49
Every time I see a Lowry post at Sadly No, I sit up a little straighter.
Johnny Coelacanth said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:51
Palin/McCain camp whips their crowds into a frenzy chanting “Kill him, Kill Him” in reference to Obama
I’m not sure this happened. Supposedly one lone shmoe at a Palin appearance yelled “kill him,” though it could have been about Ayers -or- Obama. Still, your point stands. As the desperation mounts, it’s going to get mucho mas feo.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:52
Shorter Rich Lowry?
Wouldn’t that make him an inny?
P.S. Unhappy Country.
Grand Moff Texan said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:52
The problem the Republicans face right now is that they don’t give a shit about the people they need to vote for them, and the votes know it.
.
dBa said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:54
If Obama can pal around with terrorists at the age of 8 I can practice some latitude in regards to actual truth.
The real problem is that man wasn’t issued a rebuke by McCain…that’s what’s sick about that old fuckers campaign.
forked tongue said,
October 7, 2008 at 19:58
If the name “Winky Starburst” doesn’t get a deathgrip on Rich Lowry at least as unshakeable as “Doughy Pantload” has on Jonah, I say the left blogosphere has failed to do its job.
Rabid Republican said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:03
Terrorist! Treason! Kill him!!!!! KILL!!! KILL!!!
Mo's Bike Shop said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:07
It is however his fault that he is so deluded with Republican double-think that he couldn’t possibly respond.
OneMadClown said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:09
If the name “Winky Starburst” doesn’t get a deathgrip on Rich Lowry at least as unshakeable as “Doughy Pantload” has on Jonah, I say the left blogosphere has failed to do its job.
Winky Starburst…this screams for a Bowie-esque p-shop.
PeeJ said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:11
The remaining faithful are sick, vile, dangerous people. The only thing they’ll be satisfied with is blood. Watch – it’s going to get worse. Much worse.
The upside, of course, is that McCain/Palin will be hoisted on their own petards. If there’s an actual election (as in, the October surprise isn’t martial law) McCain will be hard pressed to come up with 100 electors. I’m forecasting a landslide. Both for Obama AND the “Democrat party.”
Go ahead, John, bring it on. You’ll be sorrrry.
Rip rappin' Bob Owens said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:12
Yo yo yo I says put up da Bens for mah charcoalizzle greeeeeeeeeyull if ya feels me
Dr. BDH said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:14
Excuse me, but is that an exploded Death Star behind Mr. Lowry or a disco ball?
It’s Rich’s latest “starburst,” of course.
And I definitely second Rich’s recommendation that McCain talk more about the economy. That will help a lot. And the war in Iraq, he should talk that up, too. And tax cuts for the weathiest Americans. And reproductive rights, that’s a great issue for McCain. And drilling off-shore — since there’s millions of gallons of spilled petroleum products polluting the Gulf of Mexico after Ike, that’s another winner.
And don’t forget immigration reform.
James K. Glassman and Kevin A. Hassett said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:15
Dow 3,600: The New Strategy for Profiting From the Coming Drop in the Stock Market
mmm...fadgey! said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:23
That’s my bet, you backwards-tie-wearing mofo!
mako rojo said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:25
If he admits that McCain has run a lousy campaign and has no ideas, and Obama looks like he’ll follow Clinton’s good example of budgetary discipline, what’s the reason to vote for McCain? Oh yeah, stupid me, Obama’s black.. I must have lost my mind.
Legalize said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:26
Whenever Lowry write a column I see little starbursts and sparkly bunnies, and end up waking up in the desert without shoes. Is there a remedy for this ailment.
Oh, here it is: beer.
javafascist said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:28
That is so full of win and teh awesome it’s almost a new internet tradishun..
kth said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:29
Amazing how clear one’s mind is after a good wank.
bayville said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:30
My heart’s a flutter. I think he’s pointing at me with that stick!
El Cid said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:41
I can’t wait ’til John McCain exposes Barack Obama tonight for his associations to George Metesky, the mad bomber who attacked New York from 1940 to 1956. Both were obsessed with health care issues, Barack Obama because he’s a crazy Indo-Kenyan Muslim Communist radical Black Nationalist La Raza lover, and Metesky because his lungs were severely burned on his job and then he got screwed out of benefits. Coincidence? I think not. Barack Obama loves mad bombers.
PeeJ said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:42
I have been instructed to inform you, gentle readers, that my Ho’s sluttiness, which I had mentioned in a previous comment, is more of the theoretical, dispositional type. In actual practice, he’s not so slutty.
Am I off the hook now, dear?
Johnny Coelacanth said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:44
“Winky Starburst”
Oh dear God, but for a good old-fashioned Google bombing…
PeeJ said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:46
Also, to the t4fadger, I *may* occasionally wear a tie backwards but as for being a ‘mofo’, that depends on the ‘mo’ to which you refer. The only mother I ever fucked was…… oh forget it. I can’t even say it without getting a little bit sick.
Nimrod Gently said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:49
Help me, I can’t help waiting for the other shoe to drop.
mmm...fadgey! said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:54
I was using mofo in the broadest of terms, PeeJ. I’ve probably sported more ties backwards than you, anyways…
Fozzetti said,
October 7, 2008 at 20:55
Yesterday, a poster on Digby, after being mocked a few (107) time, wrote: I AM VOTING FOR MCCAIN BECAUSE I *HATE* YOU LIBS!!!!!
That sums up the Repug mentality pretty well.
mikey said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:02
Barack Obama loves mad bombers.
Now that I think about it, so do I.
Here’s a vote for the “Let’s Blow Shit Up” Party!
mikey
HelenWheels said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:03
“Winky Starburst”!! Oh that’s gooood. Can’t wait to have an opportunity to use it.
HelenWheels said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:03
PeeJ I also think martial law is going to be the october surprise. All signs point there. UGH.
Fozzetti said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:08
I think Richy Rich is holding a 4th of July sparkler.
eidos said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:33
Lowry argues here that when it comes to the economy McCain has been a derelict Senator. It doesn’t occur to Rich that this is rather problematic in someone aspiring to be President?
The whole article is weak. Really, when the subject isn’t Sarah Palin Lowry’s prose becomes very flaccid.
Bigby said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:35
Sooooo glad I’ll be out of the country for two weeks starting Friday. Please, no martial law til after 10pm this Friday, mmmmmkay?
Legalize said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:43
I have no love for mad bombers. Happy and gay bombers, on the other hand ….
MzNicky said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:45
If Obama can pal around with terrorists at the age of 8 I can practice some latitude in regards to actual truth.
Only if you want to be as disingenuous as a wingnut.
Smut Clyde said,
October 7, 2008 at 21:52
Mad Bomber in Love.
MaineMan said,
October 7, 2008 at 22:45
. . . . McCain/Palin will be hoisted on their own petards.
I didn’t realize that either of them had a petard in sufficient working order to hoist anything.
David in NYC said,
October 7, 2008 at 23:23
McCain/Palin will be hoisted on their own petards.
Not to be nitpicky (well, yes, exactly to be nitpicky), but the past tense of “hoist” in this context is “hoist”. McPalin will be hoist on their own petards.
As for martial law, just see this earlier post at S,N! (second video):
Sounds like they’re already softening us up.
Tricky Dick had the Rand Corporation do a study on the feasibility of imposing martial law back in the 70s (Kent State apparently being the impetus for the suggestion). I would bet dollars to donuts that that study is still lying around somewhere (probably in Cheney’s bunker).
Even more Pedantic Bastard said,
October 7, 2008 at 23:37
Actually it’s “hoist by one’s own petard.” Or substitute with for by.
http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/hoist%20by%20your%20own%20petard.html
David in NYC said,
October 7, 2008 at 23:40
Actually, we’re both wrong: it’s “with” one’s own petard:
Hamlet:
There’s letters seal’d, and my two schoolfellows,
Whom I will trust as I will adders fang’d—
They bear the mandate, they must sweep my way
And marshal me to knavery. Let it work;
For ’tis the sport to have the enginer
Hoist with his own petard, an’t shall go hard
But I will delve one yard below their mines
And blow them at the moon.
Hamlet, Act 3, scene 4, 202–209
I ain’t gonna argue with Shakespeare.
Lolly said,
October 7, 2008 at 23:55
I think Richy Rich is holding a 4th of July sparkler.
Winky! Put that thing down! You don’t know where it’s been!
/Winky’s mom
Smut Clyde said,
October 8, 2008 at 0:28
‘Petard’ is short for ‘pedantic bastard’. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some hoisting to do.
Megann McAlthouse said,
October 8, 2008 at 0:35
The guy’s a complete fucking idiot. “We need to brand Obama a jobkiller” is a terrible message to broadcast to people who have had their jobs killed by the Republicans.
SamFromUtah said,
October 8, 2008 at 0:56
“We need to brand Obama a jobkiller” is a terrible message to broadcast to people who have had their jobs killed by the Republicans.
I believe he’s invoking the time-honored wingnut strategem: “I know you are, but what am I?”
Rusty Shackleford (not that one) said,
October 8, 2008 at 16:42
Rich Lowrey is living the little right-winger’s dream of one day owning his own blue suit and pointing device and standing in front of a podium with some shit plastered on the front and boring the hell out of people. Because that is being a Real Man.