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Welcome To The Palindrome
Earlier today, Clif was poking around The Corner and said, “Later in the day these folks will be singing the praises of Sarah “Mooseburger” Palin who is waaaay more experienced and waaay more ready to be President than Obama.”
And sure enough, here we are later in the day, and as I sit here typing, Bay Buchanan is having a screaming conniption on CNN, creating an imaginary Sarah Palin who’s not only more experienced than Barack Obama (a man, it turns out, who has “done nothing but campaign for president”), but who “knows more about how to create jobs than anyone else in both campaigns.”
And now, tout à coup, it’s McCain flack Michael Duhaine, like Buchanan piling words on top of words as fast and fervently as possible. “Obama’s accomplishments next to Palin’s are insignificant,” Duhaine explains. A particular strength of Palin is her foreign policy credentials, for “she’s the Commander-in-Chief of the Alaska National Guard, and has a son who’s going to Iraq.”
Needless to say, we’re still not thoroughly convinced. But let’s check in with an expert in the art of explaining-things-to-people. Hooty-hoo, Hugh?
Victory and Energy for the Second American Century: Cheering the Palin Pick
Friday, August 29, 2008Conservatives are thrilled with the selection of Sarah Palin as John McCain’s running-mate. Scroll through the postings at RobinsonandLong.com, or listen to the hosts and callers on any of the talk shows today.
There are six reasons, all of them huge and enduring.
First, over the past month we have gone from hoping Senator McCain would win to thinking he might actually be able to win. With the selection of Governor Palin most of us are convinced he will win. Which means the country will be well led on the war for at least another four crucial years. The reason behind this new confidence leads us to the second factor.
Sarah Palin is a real deal conservative, down the line, on all of the issues. This has the immediate effect of energizing the base to battle to keep the White House and to close the gap in or take back the House of Representatives. It is especially important that she is ardently pro-life, and the story of her family is certain to resonate with those values voters who prize faith and family as the center of life.
Third, the Palin pick guarantees that the party will remain a conservative party long-term. If Senator McCain had picked a…
For counterpoint, let’s turn to this classic and oft-remarked argument, by one Hugh Hewitt:
“Cheney”
Wednesday, August 01, 2007Stephan Hayes’ new Cheney: The Untold Story of America’s Most Powerful and Controversial Vice President is a tremendous read. Hayes will be my guest today but even a long interview won’t do the book justice, so order it and read it for yourself.
I have been rereading a couple of chapters this afternoon which detail the response to the attacks of 9/11. Perhaps because of this morning’s meeting I am more aware of how consuming the defense of the country has become for the president and the vice president, but Hayes brings home the relentlessness with which the threats to the country have been pursued.
The next president has got to chose a vice president as skilled as Cheney and a team as experienced as that which was around President Bush after 9/11 if only because the scale of the responsibility is so great and the need for clear thinking so profound. The people diseased with BDS will never get this, but the country is extraordinarily blessed to have had President Bush and Vice President Cheney and their senior aides during these first few years of a very long war.
D.N. Nation said,
August 30, 2008 at 2:54
Hooters Hewitt is a pathetic hack, and always has been. If the GOP told him to go down on an electric eel, he’d do it. He isn’t worth the shit in my body.
El Cid said,
August 30, 2008 at 2:54
The war in Iraq for another 4 years? Or another 4 years of the Eternal War Against Islamosexualism?
comsympinko said,
August 30, 2008 at 2:55
Watchin’ the wheels come off and off
Off and off, off and off
Watchin’t eh wheels come off and off
Hy-ster-i-cal!
noen said,
August 30, 2008 at 2:58
Sarah Palin, Republican Vice-Presidential Nominee, Plugs Romney, Paul — But Not McCain — In MTV Interview
In this interview, Palin calls controversial Republican presidential hopeful Ron Paul “cool.” “He’s a good guy,” she added. “He’s so independent. He’s independent of the party machine. I’m like, ‘Right on, so am I.’ ”
ahem said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:02
Can we please have a reprise of Spew Spewitt’s enconia to Harriet Miers? He was, after all, a supplier of arslikhan right to the sad (and hilarious) end.
Hanx.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:07
baddabing1 wrote:
What an INCREDIBLY SEXIST EDITORIAL. This woman has WAY more executive experience than OBAMA DOES–Obama has NONE! And for that matter, NEITHER DOES BIDEN! She’s Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard, and her state has a long border with a foreign country–
==========================================
By long border with a foreign country, do you mean Canada, or the Pacific Ocean, baffoon?
~
8/29/2008 9:01:22 PM
(at the WaPoo)
All the wingnuts are running around with their blast faxes (and sharp pairs of scissors…hanx MzNicky for that image), and promoting Palindrome’s executive leadership of the Alaska National Guard.
It is to laugh. We all knew they were lemmings, but now they are marching over the cliff and into the sea, just for our amusement.
Jennifer said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:13
Well, there is this: doing something incredibly stupid if not batshit insane is one way to get people talking about something other than how you totally got owned last night.
But if you end up just owning yourself when you do the incredibly stupid and/or batshit insane thing, is that really an improvement?
Lesley said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:15
How soon before Ms Palin shoots someone in the face on a quail hunting expedition?
Apparently she hates polar bears because they get in the way of her hubby’s oil profits. I wonder how many she’s tried to shoot.
mikey said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:19
Well, to borrow a phrase, the fact is it depends on what your goals look like.
If you could force McCain/Palin to describe the world they hope their children will inhabit in 2030, it would be frightening to behold.
Of course, since you can’t even get Senator McCain to describe what he means when he uses the word “honor”, you’re not likely to get this information.
But it’s a nasty, tragic, dystopian world where wealthy people live in gated communities behind private security that regularly kills hungry scared people who venture too close, and they do so without consequences. In this world very wealthy people run multi national corporations that manufacture goods using slave labor in third world countries and use american military power to dominate an competing nation.
I don’t want to live in this world. Indeed, I will NOT live in this world….
mikey
Aaron said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:24
Third, the Palin pick guarantees that the party will remain a conservative party long-term.
Was this in doubt? They ran all the moderate and liberal Republicans out on a rail thirty years ago. Wtf, son?
Hypatia said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:25
Can anyone explain to me how this is not, at minimum, the fourth American century?
g said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:27
Like I said in the last thread, these guys are just chomping into the shit sandwich with great gusto, and smiling while they tell us it’s delicious peanut butter.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:31
Not to mention reason number seven. McCain, you see, is short. Typically short people don’t get very far in politics – so almost all of the other potentials were people who absolutely towered over Johnny-boy. What were we going to do? Make McCain wear platform shoes all the time? Dude was a POW for five and a half years, he can’t balance in platforms. He can’t even raise his hands over his head – so as soon as he loses balance, there’s no flailing for balance – it’s straight to face plant land. Kinda describes his oratorical style…
Where was I? Yeah Sarah Palin is shorter than McCain. Now there’s so quality problem solving there. You think you can compete with this tepy of resourcefulness? Well you can’t, you can’t do it my friends.
Doctorb said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:32
It’s too bad it’s a written column, because I would love to see him try to say “Commander-in-Chief of the Alaska National Guard” without giggling or at least stifling a chortle.
Also, this is only the Second American Century because the pre-Imperialist* ones don’t count.
*You know, just colonialist.
henry lewis said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:33
She’s apparently big on border security.
Cuz if it isn’t drunken Canucklevanians busting up Skagway’s taverns it’s Rooskies crossing the Bering Strait on spruce rafts.
Tim (The Other One) said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:34
she has “crazy eyes”.
just sayin’
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:39
Ace responds to your snark:
“Our Very Smart Lefty Friends Don’t Seem to Understand Irony”
Complete with a Merriam-Webster definition.
http://ace.mu.nu/archives/271934.php
Just Alison, without Qetesh said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:41
I mis-read Hewitt’s headline as Victory and Energy for the Second American Century: Cheering the Palin Prick. Am I a bad person?
Also, Mikey: your Republican dystopia sounds an awful lot like O Zone by Paul Theroux. An interesting novel, although not one of my faves. Features a bunch of rich folks venturing out of their sanitised, gated existence into the wild, getting lost, and meeting icky dirt and godawful poor people.
Just Alison, without Qetesh said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:42
Hey, I never realised that irony consisted of saying lots of dumb things and then pretending to be clever. Is it as easy as that?
Sadly, no!
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:43
Also from Ace;
“PS: This choice really seems to be wigging them the f**k out.”
This HehIndeed goes to 11.
Arky The Islahomobamaist said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:44
I wonder if the fReichtards realize they’re talking about Palin as though she’ll be the next president.
Doesn’t anyone think McCain will last another four years?
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:48
Any of you guys cheering on Gustav like Michael the Michigan Manatee?
http://hotair.com/archives/2008/08/29/michael-moore-this-hurricane-is-proof-that-there-is-a-god-in-heaven/
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:49
Booger, go tell ace to look up “whistling past the graveyard”.
Just Alison, without Qetesh said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:53
And apropos of Palin, I too spent a confused while thinking they meant Michael Palin, who’s one of my idols.
Because how could conservatives argue with that nomination? He’s got boggins of foreign experience, with all his travel docos; he’s been fightin’ man as a Knight of King Arthur; he knows how to cut down trees while singing; he’s even been a torturer (in Brazil). Plus he’s worked with Jesus, or at least Brian.
And he’s universally known as “the nice Python”. What better candidate for VP? Indeed, why stop at VP: how about Prez? Or how about Supreme God-Emperor?
Jennifer said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:53
I actually think it’s quite likely that McCain will last another four years. After all, his mother is still living (and seems to be sharper than him) and longevity does run in families.
That doesn’t make his selection of Palin any less irresponsible.
I heard a rumor that Palin was the last-choice pick, that Romney, Jindal, and Pawlenty had all turned it down, which would explain a lot. Then again, WaPo talked with someone in the Romney camp that said both Romney and Pawlenty are pissed for having been strung along, working all the while for POW Johnny’s campaign.
Who knows? And really, who cares? The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice.
pch1013 said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:54
Hey, am I the only one snickering over all those headlines reading, “McCain taps Alaska governor for Vice-President”?
I mean, ew.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:55
The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice.
We are talking about the rethuglican ticket, so the only surprise here is the woman part.
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:56
Booger, go tell ace to look up “whistling past the graveyard”.
Done. It’s way down the thread so I don’t know if he’ll see it.
Doctorb said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:58
So, the comment “this has to be parody” was pretty much accurate then?
Oh wait, he’s not talking about us.
Well anyway, his “correction” was wrong too, so there’s a certain … incongruity there.
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:58
“The woman isn’t qualified and it’s an irresponsible choice”….
…said the Obama supporter.
*snicker*
bklyn said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:58
Today I heard Palin say that she fought the good old boy machine.
Seems to me the way she fought it was to join it.
Hooty is right (did I just say that?) the conservatives will love her because she is a cold heartless SOB, And she shoots stuff and ‘Alaska is littered with the bodies of those that got in her way’ and other maverickylicious things.
And oh, she is CIC of the Alaskan National Guard which is almost as good as POW. Just as good though will be the ‘baby with downs syndrome’ card ‘ ,which I am already sick of hearing.
And she eats moose.
Friggin moose.
Well YE HAW.
Who knows what will be served at the next BBQ in Scottsdale.
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:59
“Just as good though will be the ‘baby with downs syndrome’ card ‘ ,which I am already sick of hearing.”
You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.
Lonny Martello said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:03
JOHN MCCANE HAS SELECTED SARA PALING IN A DESPERT ATTEMPT TO PROTECT HIMSELF FROM THE ONRUSHING MENASE OF TEH FUCHING FERRETS. SARA PALING FREQUENTLY STRIDES OUT INTO THE ALASKEN SNOW AND RIPS OFF ALL HER CLOATHES AND RUNS SHREEKING IN SEARTCH OF A POLER BEAR. WHEN SHE FINDS ONE SHE STRANGELS IT WITH HER BARE HANDS AND RIPS ITS GUTS OUT AND WEARS THE BLOODY PELT BACK TO TOWN TO SHOW HER FERCENESS. SHE ALSO ONCE DID THIS TO ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF THE PTA AND FROM THEY DAY FORWARD EVERYONE IN TOWN SOILED THEMSELVES WHEN THEY SAW HER COMING. SHE ALSO USED TO HAVE SIX CHILDREN BUT ATE ONE OF THEM APPROXIMETLY FOUR YEARS AGO. A POLER BEAR IS NO MATCH FOR TEH FUCHING FERRETS SO IT WILL BE ABOUT AN EVEN CONTEST WITH PALING. THAT IS THE BEST JOHN MCCANE CAN HOPE FOR TO PROTECT HIMSELF FROM HIS DATE WITH FACE EATING DESTINEY. JOE BIDAN SHOULD BRING A BURP GUN OR MAYBE AN RPG IN CASE HE SEES THAT TELLTAIL EYE TWITCH DURING THERE DEBATE.
bklyn said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:07
You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.
Sadly, no.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:09
Booger said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:58
D00d, you’re typing ace.mu at us. You’re a moron.
Doctorb said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:10
So, of course *every* governor is Commander in Chief of their state’s National Guard. Sort of. During a war or a national emergency, the POTUS can call the national guard up to active duty (changed from last year, when the POTUS was able to do that just for shits ‘n’ giggles, which was a really really weird law).
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:11
I got your Palindrome right here:
skcid fo gab gib tae nac nilap haraS
George Smiley said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:12
Every picture of her that I see, she’s wearing a different pair of glasses. WTF? Does she collect eyeglasses the way McCain collects houses?
commie atheist said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:13
Do tell.
Doctorb said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:14
ZOMG Lonny Martello broke my lungs.
commie atheist said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:15
Why am I reminded of “The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming” all of a sudden?
Jeff Gannon said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:15
Six — no, nine enduring, throbbing, uncut reasons.
Wait, what?
Righteous Bubba said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:15
Every picture of her that I see, she’s wearing a different pair of glasses. WTF?
She has clearly anticipated that people need a funny photoshop theme for her and she went for young hitmaker Elton John.
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:18
If ‘wigging the fuck out’ means ‘laughing my fucking head off’… well, then I’d have to agree.
Lancelot Link said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:19
Don’t be surprised when the right discovers the word “misogyny” for the next few months only.
Vavid Ditter said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:19
Would I be terminally groady if I expressed my desire to see a video of some Cindy McCain-Sarah Palin donut bumping?
SamFromUtah said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:21
It does look like the (vice) presidential requirement of “experience” has now morphed into the requirement of “executive experience”. As I said before, they’ll find some way of making it as convoluted as “weapons of mass destruction-related program activities” and try to claim they’ve been saying the same thing all along.
George Smiley said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:21
She’s a creationist. Gotta give her props for that one. She revels in her own stupidity — doesn’t even pretend, like the “intelligent” design crowd does. That’s a woman who knows who she is.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:22
Vavid Ditter said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:19
Would I be terminally groady if I expressed my desire to see a video of some Cindy McCain-Sarah Palin donut bumping?
You’re not fooling anybody, Grampa McSame. Now put that onion back on your belt and get the fook outta here.
N.C. said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:23
IOKTNHEIYAR.
(It’s OK to not have experience if you are a Republican.)
J— said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:24
That’s David Frum.
Hugh Hewitt's Right Hand said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:26
here are six reasons, all of them huge and enduring.
Enduring?!?! Try that on some other sucker. I can understand finishing during the bridge, but Hughie doesn’t even last to the first “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love Baby.”
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:26
That’s David Frum.
The AEI poultry are taking the non-Lieberman hard, aren’t they?
henry lewis said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:30
one of the most self-sacrificing, gallant, and honorable men ever to seek the presidency.
I’m putting an imaginary circle around that along with ‘Prove!’.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:39
AHHHHH! Sarah Palin!!!! She hunts and is like a total NRA gun nut! With Boobies!!! I’m wigging the fuck out!!!!
AHHHHH!!! The pro-lifer is gonna turn all the PUMAs against us, especially with all that complementing Hill’s on her whining skillz!!! Wigging out!
Teh Alaskan beauty queen is gonna eat moose meat! Alaska is really close to Russia! Her experience dealing with Chukotka delegates and officials from the Kamchatka Peninsula is gonna give her massive foreign police props! And the crazy gold miners from teh Yukon! I’ma WIGGING OUT!!!!
Saddling a town of 9000 with almost two million dollars of legal fees for fucking up the land deal for the new sports arena – that’s sound economadoohickey! Wigging Out I am!!!
THREE ELECTORAL VOTES (that weren’t really in play anyways)!!! We can just kiss those good-bye! Wigging Out!
J— said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:40
Mudflats also has some amusing reactions by Alaskan politicians to today’s news.
Me said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:41
Hey, am I the only one snickering over all those headlines reading, “McCain taps Alaska governor for Vice-President”?
“Five Die Laying Alaska Pipeline!”
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:42
Asking awkward questions, eh? Sounds like David Frum has taken his first fateful step on the downhill path to DirtyFuckingHippieLand. Soon he’ll be smoking cheap pot out behind the dumpster, muttering “Whaddafuk’s reality?”
noen said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:42
Apparently Sara Palin comes with her own snarky photo. Mighty nice of her.
John O said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:45
I gotta know: Are you sure HH reads this site, or do I have to send this to him?
Gosh darn it, Hugh is one funny dude. You know, not counting the future of the country and all.
I’m super happy knowing I don’t have to be a law professor, or even hold a law degree, or even be Sean Hannity to understand that education has nothing to do with intelligence.
Wow, I say. Again, please someone send me Hugh’s contact information, if we’re sure or even doubtful that he comes out here and reads the reaming.
D.N. Nation said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:45
Goober-
Your shit is old. FOAD.
Henry Dearborn said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:46
You do have to be careful of those pesky Canadians, you know. For all their politeness and hockey hair and beaver enthusiasm, they are a crafty bunch.
MzNicky said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:50
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 3:59
“Just as good though will be the ‘baby with downs syndrome’ card ‘ ,which I am already sick of hearing.”
You’re only hearing it from your side, bkln.
You are, as always, incorrect, goober. Pat Buchanan, among others, has been screaming it at the top of his lungs since around 4:00 pm today.
MzNicky said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:52
She’s a creationist. Gotta give her props for that one. She revels in her own stupidity — doesn’t even pretend, like the “intelligent” design crowd does.
She also sez she’s not had much time to give any thought to the war in Iraq, seeing as how she’s been so busy with the five kids and governing Alaska and all.
jim said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:53
The probable nominees all turning it down sounds very plausible – nobody wants to buy a ticket on the HMCS Fail during iceberg season.
I thought Wet-Start couldn’t possibly find someone more pathetic & ridiculous than he is as a running-mate.
Live & learn.
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:55
From J’s Alaskan politicians’ reactions link at 4:40, Alaska House Speaker John Harris ( R ) comments on Palin’s qualifications:
“She’s old enough. She’s a U.S. citizen.”
Can you feel the enthusiasm?
SamFromUtah said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:56
Live & learn.
I’m pretty surprised by this too. GHW Bush’s choice of Quayle didn’t surprise me too much back in the old days, because I knew that he’d need somebody who didn’t outshine him. I guess I could have foreseen something like this Palin pick on the same principle, but I’ve figured the Redoublechin Establishment wouldn’t allow anybody who wasn’t one of the big names on the ticket this time around.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:56
Don’t forget about shooting those illegal polar bears trying to sneak over the border from Canada, MzNicky.
From helicopters, of course.
J— said,
August 30, 2008 at 4:58
And wolves.
Principal Blackman said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:04
*ahem*
The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.
commie atheist said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:05
Wow, even Republicans in her home state don’t like her. Hmmm…
Principal Blackman said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:06
*ahem*
The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.
Principal Blackman said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:08
The first McCain-Palin campaign poster is out.
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:11
It sure surprised me, once I figured out what an utter zero Quayle was. It reminded me of what a Houston powerbroker said about an especially inept mayor back in the 1970s: “I like my mayors dumb, but not this dumb.”
As for Palin, the commentary I’m seeing from Alaskan bloggers seems to confirm that she’s widely regarded as a lightweight. I’d love to know the background on this strange decision. I’m assuming that the McCain people had trouble getting their first choices to take the job, became pressed for time, and just fucked up.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:14
would you put an untested small-town mayor a heartbeat away from the presidency?
Well, that depends on the mayor. It depends on the small town.
And it depends on the presidency, of course.
Ham-fisted mayor of Berlin, New Hampshire for vice president of the Coos County Chamber of Commerce?
Yeah, sure, why not?
Penurious mayor of New Braunfels, Texas for vice president of the World Bank?
I’d need to sleep on that one.
Formerly curvaceous mayor of Wasilla, Alaska for vice president of the United States?
I really want some of whatever John McCain was smoking last night.
J— said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:17
Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.
Palin Comparison « Beware The Man said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:26
[...] 8: How am I to keep up? Sadly, No! points out the wondrous and spectacular intellectual consistency of the right-wing blowha…, who it is alleged has a law degree. Meaning he’s a “smart” wingnut. Possibly [...]
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:26
Ha ha ha. Nice try Lie-bruls. What about Alaska’s THREE ELECTORAL VOTES (that were extremely likely Republican already)? You got a snippy come back for that one? Absolutely wigging out – that’s what you DFH’s are.
Arky The Islahomobamaist said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:41
Well Commie Atheist, it is obvious that Lyda Green is a big nasty woman-hating … Um. Well she’s a Democra- Er.
She hates guns! That’s it! See, it says so on her official website:
Life Member – National Rifle Assocation [sic].
Well. She’s old so who cares what she thinks?
Not that I have anything against old people. Just old women.
Who disagree with John McPOW.
Yeah.
thomas said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:42
Clearly, Republicans like making bold decisions. They also like making bold decisions that are a surprise to everybody. Bold and surprising.
But I think there is a danger, in light of how the Bush administration has operated like a fighter jet at full throttle with the drunken pilot slumped over the controls, that Bold and Surprising will at this point actually read like authoritarian, bullying, out of touch, I make the decisions around here, paternalistic, don’t tell me what to do, I know what’s best, look at me look at me look at me pronouncements. And at this point America has finally caught up to the rest of the world in that we are all really tired of that shit. After the DNC’s brilliant “you are a necessary part of the process, we can’t do it without you” hope and change message is McCain’s message really going to be “Prepare yourself! You have no idea what I’m going to do next!”
Jas said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:42
nobody reads my blog, so I’m going to put this here…
Heard Ms. Palin on the radio tonight, heading to the store, and took but a second to realize that she was worth her weight in gold for the coming debates and election for one reason and one reason only.
She sounds exactly like Grace, Ed Rooney’s secretary, from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.
Somebody keep Tina Fey from voting, because if this ticket makes it all the way to the whitehouse, she’s got at least three, four Saturday Night Live appearances a year for the next four all wrapped up.
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:47
Oh yeah? Well, we’ve got Delaware sewed up!
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:56
I’ve been giving it some thought – and while it is imperative that POW-y McBombs-a-lot must be kept as far away from the White House as possible, I think I don’t have a problem with Trooper-Gate. Should the state’s govenor be interfereing with personnel issues of the local police? Generallu I would say no – but this Mike Wooten guy is a real piece of work.
http://www.adn.com/politics/story/476430.html
And he got five days suspension – and I believe is back on the force, with his badge and gun.
Mike N. said,
August 30, 2008 at 5:58
Beautifully done, SN.
Some Guy said,
August 30, 2008 at 6:09
Wouldn’t being the Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard kind of be like being the Fire Chief of the Bedrock Volunteer Fire Department?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flintstones#Overview
thomas said,
August 30, 2008 at 6:13
At first I thought, “if Biden can make it through the debates without a condescending sigh or a “yeeeaargh!” this sucker is a done deal.” And then I saw the lineup photo at the event with Palin holding her infant, the youngest of five, and thought, ‘holy crap, how is Biden going to beat up on a breastfeeding mother without looking like a monster?” Welll played, McCain. Well played.
Rightwingsnarkle said,
August 30, 2008 at 6:15
Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.
Hey, you forgot to mention the crab on the coffee table.
That’s a motherfucking King Crab. The deadliest catch.
But the photo does provide fodder for some bad three-way/bestiality jokes.
Not that I would make any, or suggest that others do so.
But John McCain just might…
…and when she woke up she murmured, “What was the name of that marvelous crab?”
Mo's Bike Shop said,
August 30, 2008 at 6:24
So, “Experience” is a dog whistle for “White” ?
I’m just catching up, is it possible that McCain is using the Chewbacca Defense?
thomas said,
August 30, 2008 at 6:32
Obviously she and her husband TOBY are corrupt, compromised, lightweight crooks. But is she breastfeeding? And when is it OK to run down the symbolic value of breastfeeders?
WereBear said,
August 30, 2008 at 7:29
Sadly, No!
Dear Partner chortled over it all evening. Especially after I pointed out that McCain was checking out the new Veep’s accouterments during her speech. Realized he was doing it on national TV, stopped… and then couldn’t resist doing it again.
I foresee a lot of late nights at the office, working on the campaign. He has to discuss policy with his new running mate, after all. They need to work very closely together, hammering out the details of their administration’s sexual education guidelines.
Cindy was wearing her hair down and staring daggers at Miss Mooseburger. We just might see some washed-up-rodeo-queen-pill-freak-fake-only-child smackdown action here!
Snarki, child of Loki said,
August 30, 2008 at 7:44
Rightwingsnarkle:
Palin in her Anchorage office, with dead bear.
Hey, you forgot to mention the crab …
Wait, she’s got crabs? Who’s doing the vetting on this?
Red said,
August 30, 2008 at 7:48
Well, if things keep going the way they are, it’s conceivable we’ll see the first President with Down’s Syndrome.
bad person said,
August 30, 2008 at 7:54
Superduper scenario #1
[Rove's telephone rings]
Karl Rove: Hello?
Sarah Palin: Hello Mr Rove? You told me, in February, to call you if circumstances changed.
Rove: Palin? Palin? Aren’t you the governor of…Litchenstein?
Sarah: Alaska. I’m the governor of Alaska. Your group made a pro forma tour of the world asking republican drones if they were interested in being veepee.
Rove: Oh, okay. Well, we’ve already made a decision and its not you.
Sarah: Oh, okay. I was just calling to tell you to stop considering me, if you were considering me, because I just found out I’m pregnant for the sixth time.
Rove: Wha..? You have five kids already and my staff let you get pregnant again?
Sarah: Its not their fault. My husband is unaffiliated.
Rove: Aren’t you the republican governor with big boobs?
Sarah: Only republicans say that to my face, but yes. Arnold has some impressive pecs, but I still outmeasure him, cupwise. Anyway, I have to withdraw my name from consideration because I’m pregnant and my baby can’t tolerate a long campaign. My last was a less-abled child, and I want to do my utmost to have this one as healthy as she can be.
Rove: Does anyone else know you’re pregnant?
Sarah: No, I called you first….
[fade out]
[fade in]
Sarah: …and so it is with deep regret that I withdraw my name in nomination for The Republican Candidate for the Vice President of the United States, in order to care for my child, in hopes that it not become a Full Retard, yet still cognizant of four Supreme Court Justices yet to be replaced. Although too late to be confirmed at a full convention of Republicans, I’m sure that [name to inserted later] will be approved by acclamation of old rich white men. In the meantime, I’ll return to Alaska where emergency appropriations for Alaskan citizens payouts will insure my reelection for many years to come.
[end]
Fozzetti said,
August 30, 2008 at 8:46
McCain does like the Beauty Queens, doesn’t he? Maybe he should have picked Miss America?
Some Guy said,
August 30, 2008 at 9:05
Fozzetti raises an excellent point. Someone needs to find out the legality of being both Vice President AND First Lady at the same time. Cindy may want to contact whatever Wife x.1 Alpha-Build’s name was, and find out how the divorce process usually goes.
owlbear1 said,
August 30, 2008 at 9:24
Goober, you are absolutely correct! Two years as a queen of Alaska has been more than enough time for Mrs. Palin to show her mettle. You keep telling everyone how full of shit McCain was for making such a big deal of Obama’s scant 8 years.
“Commander and Chief of the Alaska National Guard”??
Oh fuck is that funny!
Anne Laurie said,
August 30, 2008 at 9:37
I’d love to know the background on this strange decision. I’m assuming that the McCain people had trouble getting their first choices to take the job, became pressed for time, and just fucked up.
Nah, the Permanent Republican Party has just officially announced that they plan to spend the next four years in the peanut gallery, doing their mighty best to obstruct President Obama’s efforts to clean up the mess they’ve left him (us). Mrs. Family-Values has a newborn whose best chances of growing up a functional member of society depend on the kind of one-on-one care he gets during the next five years. If we’re going to give Palin credit for her professed beliefs (yes, she’s a Republican, but bear with me), there’s no fvcking way she can dump young Trig with a team of nannies for the next four years. On the other hand, she can spend the next eight weeks acting the pert, smiling Talibangelical backdrop to Old Lame John, especially if she’s got a fat Wingnut Welfare guarantee to backstop the family fortunes when she goes back to her part-time-legislature federal-welfare day job. And her “sacrifice” preserves the unsoiled electability of all the Real, Serious (male) Rethug candidates for 2012 (cf the Empire Strikes Back).
Prog Gold » Blog Archive » Grandpa & Mary-Ellen Go To Washington said,
August 30, 2008 at 10:01
[...] UPDATE II: Courtesy of Principal Blackman in SN’s comments: [...]
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:10
What?!! She’s a creationist??? No way, man!
A professing Christian who believes the Bible???
SCANDALOUS, I SAY!
WereBear said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:17
If we acrostic “goober” we get “booger.”
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:19
goober,
Normally I don’t have a problem with poking fun at someone’s religion, because I’m a bit of a dick. This case is no exception. Particularly because, as a major government figure, she has significant influence on education policy.
http://scienceblogs.com/afarensis/2006/10/27/intelligent_design_and_the_ala/
If you don’t understand why that’s a problem… well I guess I wouldn’t be surprised considering your display of intelligence so far.
Dreamweasel said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:21
…said the Obama supporter. *snicker*
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sarah Palin: the first genuinely sarcastic Vice-Presidential choice in American history.
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:50
I can’t see that. The wingnuts would never willingly give up being in power. I believe they understand that once they’re tossed out they might never get back in. Nor can I see McCain throwing the election for the good of the Republican Party – I haven’t seen any evidence that he gives any more of a shit about his party than Bush does.
No, I think the choice of Palin was a simple, old-fashioned fuck-up
goober said,
August 30, 2008 at 15:53
Palin has made no move to see that Creationism is taught in schools (unlike Jindal).
But, like all good proggs it’s the intentions that matter to you, not results.
One more time, with feeling: PALIN HAS MADE NO MOVE WHATSOEVER TO SEE THAT CREATIONISM IS PART OF ALASKA SCHOOL CURRICULUM.
She merely expressed her personal belief.
If you can’t tell the difference, perhaps YOU are the one whos intelligence should be questioned.
His Grace said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:01
Uhh goober… she’s only been governor for what? Less than two years?
Just imagine the wingnut outcry if she was an atheist and suggested that she personally believed that kids should be taught that “there is no scientific evidence of God.”
Gary Ruppert said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:02
“Palin has made no move to see that Creationism is taught in schools (unlike Jindal).
But, like all good proggs it’s the intentions that matter to you, not results.”
The fact is, she should have.
And I hope that when McCain wins, she can concentrate on returning our institutions, corrupted by liberal bias influence, back to to freedom and Bible based values of the Heartland.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:07
Gee, booger.
You’re saying that if results mattered to us, we’d all be voting for 4 more years of bush?
Damn you wingnuts are stupid.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:07
PALIN HAS MADE NO MOVE WHATSOEVER TO SEE THAT CREATIONISM IS PART OF ALASKA SCHOOL CURRICULUM.
Great choice: someone who professes the kook position but doesn’t really give a shit. See David Kuo on ways to lose the Republican base.
Rary Goobert said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:08
Palin will make an awesome vice president, as she stands to take the oath of office while breastfeeding her Down syndrome son with one hand and putting her other hand on the awesomest book ever, the Bible, which as we in the Heartland, which totally excludes Illinois, know, tells us in no uncertain terms that Jesus rode dinosaurs and therefore she, the hottest breastfeeding VP ever in the history of the world, will be free to institute the result of her intention, which is that no child be left behind in knowing the Word of the Lord instead of all that scienc-y stuff, which is just theory anyway and not real facts like the Bible, which tells me so.
Suicidal Zebra said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:12
So, I wonder which is a better qualification for being Vice President:
Commander in Chief of the Alaska National Guard
or
Colonel-in-Chief of the Norwegian King’s Guard.
Cos I’m betting the only sizeable difference is the amount of clothes each role requires.
Also, if the Right are going on about meaningful experience, i.e. ‘Executive Experience’ being akin to job roll of a state Governor, just how much ‘Experience’ does John McCain have?
Snorghagen said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:13
Be sure to use your spell-checker on any sentence that questions someone else’s intelligence.
I notice that this goober/booger troll keeps getting easily smacked down but keeps coming back for more punishment.
Has anyone ever done a study on political masochism?
Rary Goobert said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:18
Mr. Zeebra: Listen here, buster, John McInsane did executive duty in the Hanoi Hilton for five and a half years, probably before you were even born since he’s about 85 years old, and that’s all the “experience” anyone needs to be president, so stick that in your hippie crack pipe and smoke it.
Legalize said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:22
I would pay 5 bucks to go back in time (in a time machine) and be in the room when Joe Lieberman found out he was being passed over – for Mandy Mooseburgers. I wonder if Holy Joe is now reconsidering his horse in this race.
ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:27
Colonel-In-Chief Sir Nils Olav!
Eight tons of awesome…hanx Suicidal Zebra.
"Oh Stewardess, I Speak 'Nut" said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:45
“Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sarah Palin: the first genuinely sarcastic Vice-Presidential choice in American history.”
What, have we already forgotten Spiro T. Agnew? And Dan “Mr. Potatoehead” Quayle? For shame!
Not to mention Dick “Halliburton” Cheney. Where’s teh love, people?
Righteous Bubba said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:53
Scrambled Crocodile with Stuffed Spun curd Cheeseses
Ingredients:
1 pound crocodile, bootlessly shredded
1 pound naked spun curd cheeses, peevedly baked
4 cans stupid soybean, salted
6 bunches springbok liver, grated
7 tablespoons baking soda
2 pinches soy sauce
Pre-heat your oven to 440 Farenheit. Tamely grease a cookie sheet. Separate crocodile eye from foot. Consume foot. Use a food processor to mash the soybean with the spun curd cheeses. Stuff the resulting concoction into the crocodile. Shred – very self-pityingly – the springbok liver, baking soda, and the soy sauce. Pound everything together enviably. Do not bake for hours. Instead, scramble as if your femininity depended on it. Serves friends with tan stomachs.
Righteous Bubba said,
August 30, 2008 at 16:54
FYWP.
actor212 said,
August 30, 2008 at 17:58
How is Hugetits still relevant?
SamFromUtah said,
August 30, 2008 at 19:35
Eight tons of awesome…hanx Suicidal Zebra.
Seconded! That picture of Sir Nils inspecting the troops is priceless.
Dragon-King Wangchuck said,
August 30, 2008 at 22:01
I’m so sad that I didn’t get a chance to pick the booger when it was timely.
booger, when your defense of a person comes down to – but she didn’t act on her convictions – well, that’s just kinda sad.
Is Palin dumb as a bag of rocks? maybe. Dangerous to the education of children – well according to booger – definitely not since she wasn’t able to implement “teaching the controversy”. Hey, that sounds like a great reason to have her a heartbeat away from the Presidency.
Kip W said,
September 4, 2008 at 15:08
People with bumper stickers trumpeting their prejudice and ignorance to the world are thoughtfully warning us not to take stock in anything they say. In written columns, this vital function is performed by the artful use of the initials “BDS.” Once you see those three letters, presented that way, you know there’s no reason to believe anything else that writer says, and you can use the free time to eat flan or look for funny typos in the newspaper.