Jul
8
8
Atrios Wounds Us. We Respond in Kind
So this is how we’re going to play the game, eh?
Well then, let’s start off with a li’l classic called “Thank You, America.” It goes a little somethin’ like this:
And from there, we move onto this guy, who might very well be the most insane honky I’ve ever seen:
Next, here’s a patriotic rap ditty called “Warrior Nation” by a different crazy white guy:
And here’s Ted Nugent, who sings a song telling anti-gun liberals to “kiss his glock”:
And finally, here’s David Hasselhoff singing “Hooked on a Feeling”:
May God have mercy on your so-called “soul.”
Otto Man said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:22
The Force is strong in this one.
Matt Browner-Hamlin said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:23
Please, stop, I surrender. How many more civilians must die in this senseless violence?
Brad R. said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:24
Matt- we’re sorry that you had to be collateral damage. But in this fight, the forces of liberty and shitty videos must prevail. We shall remember to put your friends’ names on the memorial wall.
Jay said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:32
I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion, and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids…
Gavin M. said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:32
I can’t believe that Benatar video hardly left a mark.
It might be time to bust out the experimental weapons… Korean skinhead bands and the like…
MarkC said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:38
Hasselhoff.
Who could have anticipated that you would violate all norms of civilized warfare?
Have you no spark of human decency?
Raoul_Duke said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:39
DEAR SADLY, NO!
you have violated the haseelhoff video accords in your postings.
as such, please admit defeat in this unholy war.
“Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.”
CS Lewis Jr. said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:42
Er… what exactly does Knight Rider think he’s doing? Is that supposed to be camp? Was everybody involved in making that video high? I mean seriously, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?
Blackbird said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:42
If you want patriotic, search for “Just Say Whoa.”
Or if you want to stick with weird, you could go with a Finnish glam metal band covering a Creedence song– http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDp24CmAHbo&search=hanoi%20rocks
CS Lewis Jr. said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:46
Also, I cannot tell you how relieved I was when they guy in the flag hat stood up at the end of his video and he was wearing pants.
J— said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:47
PsyOps time—drop Eek A Mouse’s “Safari” on ‘em.
Raoul_Duke said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:47
Jay –
“Fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face.”
until this began…
Blackbird said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:47
Speaking of Finnish oddities, you can’t go wrong with the Leningrad Cowboys, either. Here they are singing “Sweet Home Alabama” with the Red Army Choir- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mt2YuLds48k&search=leningrad%20cowboys
Dweeze said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:48
I was content to just sit back and watch until you unleashed Hoff. That sort of things requires something like this.
(Please, Goddess Shakira, let the html work right.)
fourmorewars said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:50
Wow. Listened to it for the cheesiness, then what to my wondering ears should appear, ‘Warrior Nation’ ends up antiwar!
Jillian said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:51
For the love of God, you must STOP!!
There is but one thing that can come of this…
An entire generation – a Lost Generation – of blogosphere expatriots will cynically turn their backs on the internets and move to the real world, where they will wander, despondent and alone. They’ll gather in quite little (non cyber-)cafes, drinking coffees and citron presses and pass the time making wry, bitter observations about the naivete of their youth, whne they thought that life in the internets would somehow be better. Shellshocked, disfigured, and hopeless, they will be your final legacy, the offspring of your madness.
Have you no shame?
And of you all, I would have thought better of Gavin. After all the time he has spent fixing the internets, I never thought I’d live to see the day where he was the architect of their destruction. O tempora! O mores!!
Emboldened » Blog Archive » Give peace a chance said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:53
[...] That’s all I’m saying. [...]
kenlac said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:53
And to think that we have Al Gore and his marvelous invention to thank for all of this.
Terry C, Patriotic Dissenter said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:54
Okay, to quote the late great Graham Chapman, this has just become too silly!
kenlac said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:55
HOOKED ON A FEELING!?!? Damn, Brad, we didn’t know you were a nuclear state!
Matt Browner-Hamlin said,
July 8, 2006 at 19:55
Brad – The greatest memorial you could leave for my lost comrade is a lasting peace. Plaques and monuments mean nothing if their is no end to hostilities.
fourmorewars said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:02
Yep, I wasn’t mistaken. Antiwar. I think the last clip, Cronkite’s ‘that’s the way it is, march –, 1981, I betcha anything that’s the birthdate of the guy’s daughter, at least if it’s a true story, which seems plausible.
J— said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:05
Perhaps it’s time to summon the Greatest American Hero.
Jay said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:09
Raoul Duke, do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk, ice cream? Ice cream, Mandrake? Children’s ice cream!
[sigh] Anyone else hot?
byteb said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:12
Can’t we all just get along? (suppresses heartbreaking sob)
K. Ron Silkwood said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:15
This is madness. Roaches will inherit the Internets. Won’t someone think of the children?
Raoul_Duke said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:19
Jay
I have heard such and, as a result, i am praying 379 linguini noodles to the flying spaghetti monster in hopes that that He will bring an end to this madness.
“Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!”
Baseballgirl said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:22
Wrong in so many levels *hides*:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9rWFZesV8s
Marsupial said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:26
Enough! Tone-deaf jingoism can only carry a side so far. I beg you: break out the Haysi Fantayzee!!
celticgirl said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:41
My eyes and ears are bleeding!!1one!!eleven!
*sobs* Oh the humanity….
Bistroist said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:49
At last! Thank you, baseballgirl, I was wondering why Yatta hadn’t turned up yet.
With that is out of the way, I wonder if I may introduce you to my late countryman Tommy – best crappy video ever, in my humble opinion.
Another one I wondered why you’ve left out is Europe – The Final Countdown. I can’t recall if this one has been mentioned yet, but it’s probably the worst crime Phil Collins has ever commited against humanity.
I’m a young whippersnapper, see, so in order to dole out some proper crap, I’d have to draw on some more recent groups like
Las Ketchup or even worse, the Cheeky Girls – that last one is so bad it’s not even funny, though.
One final mention; Daler Mehndi is pure, unadulterated teh awsome!!eleventy!
spalding said,
July 8, 2006 at 20:55
hey hey!
i’ve been in reno for six weeks. what did i miss?
oh…oh no. oh no. this can’t be.
einstien said ww4 would be fought with sticks and stones, but this is monstrous.
Marq said,
July 8, 2006 at 23:03
My gawd, Brad, you made Jillian make a *typo*! That’s a violation of the Geneva Convention!
Grumpasaurus.com » Armageddon said,
July 12, 2006 at 0:53
[...] There was recently a battle of awful YouTube shenanigans. I am surprised that during the entire festivities, this was never brought into the fray: [...]
Feeblemind » The horror… the horror… said,
July 13, 2006 at 22:39
[...] We are only just beginning to recover after the massive devastation. Initially I have to admit I thought we could survive unscathed, having built up a strong missile defense system through years of extensive research. We watched in awe as attack after vicious attack struck home, arogantly believing that we would be spared from the devestation. However, without the patented “Joe and the Bots” shield in place, our defenses quickly crumbled. [...]