Feb
18
18
Good God
Y’know, as much as I bitch about the Christian Right in this country, at least they don’t do shit like this:
A Pakistani cleric announced a $1 million bounty for killing a cartoonist who drew the Prophet Muhammad as thousands joined street protests after Friday prayers.
Let me just go on the record in saying that my scorn for religious fundamentalists is 100% non-denominational.
LA Confidential Pantload said,
February 18, 2006 at 21:27
Dr. Evil lives in Pakistan? Who knew?
mr. memento said,
February 18, 2006 at 21:56
I’m sure glad Pakistan are our allies in the Great War on Terra.
Brad R. said,
February 18, 2006 at 22:10
Yeah, no kidding. I hope he said, “I am issuing a bounty for this cartoonist for… ONE MILLION DOLLARS!!!”
Cargo said,
February 18, 2006 at 22:19
He would do it himself but clerics cannot use edged weapons.
celticgirl said,
February 18, 2006 at 22:27
The only reason Fred Phelps hasn’t tried this yet is because he’s too cheap. I’m sure he’d issue a fatwa if there was a Christian equivalent.
Then there’s Pat “I’m calling for assasination of a foreign leader” Robertson.
They’re all fuckwits if you ask me.
Red and Black said,
February 18, 2006 at 22:50
Let me go on record as saying that my scorn for religion extends beyond just the fundamentalists. It’s all bad. It’s all training folks to abandon critical thinking and to bow down to authority.
aaron said,
February 18, 2006 at 22:55
This is a morbid question, but how do they verify this? Do you have to show up with the guy’s head in a bag, like some scene from Jabba’s palace or some such?
fiver said,
February 18, 2006 at 23:08
He would do it himself but clerics cannot use edged weapons.
Suuuuuuuure. I bet he’s got “back problems” too.
Marq said,
February 19, 2006 at 1:12
Y’know, in this country, if I heard a pastor make a similar pronouncement, I’d report him to the cops. And while traditionally, the pastor would be in trouble, I’m beginning to think the cops might arrest me instead, these days.
Birdseatbugs said,
February 19, 2006 at 1:44
Cargo — Ha! Seriously, though, that’s never made any sense to me. Clerics are supposed to be all about the healing and the kindness, right? What’s so kind about bludgeoning someone to death? It seems like it would be far more time-consuming and painful…
Edmund Schluessel said,
February 19, 2006 at 2:26
The Christian Right shoots doctors.
J. A. Baker said,
February 19, 2006 at 3:45
Y’know, as much as I bitch about the Christian Right in this country, at least they don’t do shit like this:
They don’t?
Pastor Pistle said,
February 19, 2006 at 8:54
Friends, not to be outdone by some sand digger, we at Landover Baptist are contemplating the creation of a non-prophet organization to raise money for similar offers from the Christian Right. We Christians have a proven track record with injun scalp bounties and we are sure that Halliburton will be a huge financial contributor as well as supplying free napalm and white phosphorus weaponry. The problem is that not even we can see the point of killing a cartoonist for drawing a cartoon. However, GOD commands us to kill anyone who “pissith against a wall”. (1Kings,16:11-12). Or has otherwise touched “the accursed thing”. And friends, we are almost absolutely sure that at least SOME Muslim has touched the “accursed thing”. So we are praying
that our GODLY President, who was appointed personally by JESUS, will follow Mr Cheney’s example in the middle east except with a nuke-u-lar shotgun.
shargash said,
February 19, 2006 at 18:03
Pat Robertson failed to include a bounty on his call for Chavez’ assassination. The main difference appears to be that Robertson is a cheap-ass SOB. Put your money where your mouth is, Pat!
Jillian said,
February 19, 2006 at 22:19
I would say that the main difference is that Pakistani-Americans go out of their way to distance themselves from nutjobs like this.
Fundicratic-Americans, however, go out of their way to verbally fellate homicide-ideating psychopaths like Pat Robertson every chance they get.
GuinnessGuy said,
February 19, 2006 at 23:59
It’s a matter of distance in that case- the nutzies in Pakistan can’t harm Pakistani-Americans, whereas dissinters in the Evangelical Churches can be ruined by their fellows for speaking out here, whereas I suppose Evangelicals away from Robertson’s political structure can afford to condemn him. Some who are a little closer did actually condemn Crazy Pat, so there’s hope on all sides.
Still- this guy might be a little more ballsy than Pat, if not much more (if at all more) insane.
Major Woody said,
February 20, 2006 at 6:23
Cartoonists get a big AC bonus against clerics, too.
GuinnessGuy said,
February 20, 2006 at 9:37
True- Cartoonists also get Favored Enemy: politician, cleric or celebrity as a class feature.
Sneak Attack +1d6/2 levels cobagz!
Anonymous said,
February 20, 2006 at 20:07
A Pakistani cleric announced a $1 million bounty for killing a cartoonist who drew the Prophet Muhammad as thousands joined street protests after Friday prayers.
Yep, and some of our homegrown wingnuts shot doctors, left a bomb at the Atlanta Games and at a women’s clinic.
I fully believe that the main difference between the “oh so violent” Muslim fundies and our own Christian fundies is that the Christians live in America, where we have TV, porn, ice cream and beer to assuage the daily misery and suffering, making ‘Murricans of all stripes much less likely to want to blow themselves up. Plus, we’ve got a giant kickass military to do the blowin’-up for us.
Why throw rocks at an embassy when you’ve got drones and cruise missiles to level the whole damn city?
Then we get crypto-racist Westerners who write poo like “multiculturalist liberal asshats are gonna get us killed”, when it’s our heads up our asses that are gonna get us killed.
MCH said,
February 20, 2006 at 20:08
Sorry, sorry, that was me, didn’t mean to be an anony-moose.
elemental said,
February 20, 2006 at 21:56
Pakistan is a poor country, if that mofo has a million bucks he ought to be helping out with earthquake relief or something else that actually benefits his ‘flock.’ Fucking asshole.
BTW, mr. memento, the government of Pakistan, the fundy cleric, and the general population – not all the same person. In the context of this story, your criticism seems to ignore that fact.
GuinnessGuy said,
February 21, 2006 at 0:16
Pat has his Tax Shelter U, Quareshi gets a mattress full of cash- actually, the offer currently stands at:
“$1 million dollars from the association of the jewelers bazaar, one million rupees ($16,700) from Masjid Mohabat Khan and 500,000 rupees ($8,350) and a car from Jamia Ashrafia as a reward,”