12
Mr. Some-imagine, meet Mr. Few-had
Everyone else has yoinked onto this already, but here’s Jonah at Townhall.com singin’ that Duran Duran late-career fave, ‘Too Much Information’:
While my undergraduate experience was not exactly the late-night Cinemax adventure some imagine when they hear that there was a roughly 30-to-1 female-to-male student ratio, I did find the experience rewarding on several fronts.
A ratio of 30-1?
Worst. Sexual History. 3V@R!!1!!!!111!!eleventyone11!!!
My alma mater had a ratio of about 1.2:1, and you grabbed on and rode that .2, man. Over 4 years, that yielded large dividends.
Are pictures working yet? Can we post that pic of Jonah with Kennedy at that MTV thing — the one where he’s holding the microphone like it’s a boinky wiener in his lap?
Nah, too depressing. 30-1. Jeez.
A Confessional Moment said,
January 12, 2006 at 9:39
Finally I am jealous of Jonah for one single thing. But am I really? I have the feeling that I only want to be in the club where Jonah could not be a member, but something tells me that there are more clubs that would take a squishy layabout playboy than would take a human stick figure lowest form of nerd possible- the kind other nerds look down upon, the un-nerdly nerd. Why couldn’t I have been more nerdly! Or squishier? Or more layabout-ish?
Sadly, No! said,
January 12, 2006 at 10:00
The answers are yes and no.
shingles said,
January 12, 2006 at 14:57
His attempts to pass himself off as the “Fifth Duke of Cleveland” didn’t help much.
spencer said,
January 12, 2006 at 15:49
My alma mater had a 1.5-to-1 ratio, made all the sweeter by the knowledge that the ratio at our cross-state rival school was closer to 0.6-to-1.
Made it a bit more palatable when they beat us in football.
norbizness said,
January 12, 2006 at 15:53
There a joke about masturbating while eating Cheetos in that sexual history somewhere.
One of Jonah's First said,
January 12, 2006 at 15:54
It was the only sexual experience that I can honestly say smelled like yeasty rising sourdough.
DJ said,
January 12, 2006 at 17:44
The ratio could have been 60:1 and Jonah still wouldn’t have gotten any play.
tigrismus said,
January 12, 2006 at 18:07
was not exactly the late-night Cinemax adventure some imagine
Thwartalicious! That tidbit tells us everything we need to know about why he chose Goucher, and that he left it a beaten man. So to speak.
ambidextrous_girl said,
January 12, 2006 at 18:31
This hurt me. Why oh why did I click the link?
I liked this line in his column though, he’s clearly unaware of ‘alternative’ ways to read it:
“I think it’s a great book, and I truly would not say so if I thought otherwise.”
brian said,
January 12, 2006 at 20:09
My first college had about a 1 to 2.5 ratio, so to achieve any kind of dating episodes at all, you had to be pretty aggressive and/or inventive to begin with.
30 to 1? I would have been friggin KING. Or at least Wilt Chamberlain.
Jonah’s a putz.
Alexander Wolfe said,
January 12, 2006 at 20:19
Well, the important stat is the ratio of hot chicks to guys.
Kathleen said,
January 12, 2006 at 20:20
I would think that someone with such weird mother issues wouldn’t be attending a school with a 30-1 female/male ratio.
I also see why Jonah took so much umbrage about Digby’s purporting definiton of becoming a man (fighting in a war or getting laid A LOT). see http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2006_01_08_digbysblog_archive.html#113691469969412456
Li'l Innocent said,
January 13, 2006 at 8:22
Thing is, when you’ve got that large a female majority, the girls are fully capable of getting together and developing a mind-melded collective sneer about a guy.
Sure, going to an all-girl school can make nubile young women crazy – -
- – but not that crazy.
Former girls’ college attendee,
Li’l Innocent
chefrad said,
January 14, 2006 at 22:20
The girls’ verdict was that Jonah had every quality of a dog, but loyalty.